Quintessence

Escaping the Mechanical Maze & Reconnecting with Nature at Dharamkot

2023-06-25T23:31:00.000-07:00

Escaping the Mechanical Maze & Reconnecting with Nature at Dharamkot

Your dearest writer writing from the most beautiful place in Northern India.

This blog post captures the transition in the perspective of someone who travelled from a monotonous mechanical world (with 9–8 job) to a beautiful, serene hilly place where the only sound you could hear is bird chirps, cow’s moos, breeze-filled rains, and soft storms & absolute calmness.

For someone whose day starts amidst a chaotic environment with instructing an ever-shouting maid and grumpy cook, while trying to come to fullest sense even at 8 am in the morning, only to struggle and find her office stuff lost amidst a messy house; And somehow finally getting ready while still parallelly attending a 9 am meeting, and pushing the so-called breakfast down her throat, so she could get stuck and travel like a headless chicken amidst countless others in a scorching 38 deg weather with full on traffic, where she sweats endlessly to the extent that half her make up vanishes by the time she reaches office!!!! — I’ll allow you to take a breath as you finish reading this sentence that describes our regular lives.

Source: Unsplash

For someone whose day starts like this, almost meaningless, almost mechanical, almost following a pre-written algorithm of how to live a life, while trying to find whatever purpose is left, this vacation of mine to Dharamshala/ Dharamkot came like a blessing.

Nadi Village, Himachal Pradesh

Right now, at this moment, I’m sitting in front of snow-capped mountains, surrounded by lush green trees everywhere, where birds chirp endlessly and dogs come & sit next to you, neither scaring you nor getting scared by you. A place where oneness is defined, where you become something along with nature; where your morning starts with a long trek up the hills, and even that is tough, especially for someone who hasn’t worked out in ages. But that small trek every morning, trying to capture nature in its truest form, like wanting to look at your love, the moment she wakes up, those finest morning moments, the pearly droplets hanging down every leaflet, the damp road, the cool & serene environment, and chillness striking every single cell of yours despite the innumerable layers you have covered yourselves with, the slow walk along with friendly dogs & cows like we all are one and the same in the world. You do you, I will do me, and as long as our paths run parallel with no interruption, we have nothing to worry about.

And amidst this deafening silence, you will sometimes find a huge sense of void, an empty space inside, that crawls outta nowhere as you are not used to such a calm environment where you gotta do nothing but relax, chill, and enjoy. Your mind gets scared a little bit too. “ Oh, god, I’m not used to such a state, I need problems, I need pain, I need worry, I need to rant about how my life is going meaningless down the drain”. Coz without all that we haven’t defined ourselves who we are, beyond all that noise. And when we get that chance, we really don’t know what to do about it.

I guess beauty lies in understanding that void, that empty space, accepting it & trying to figure out what to do with it. I see innumerable no. of ppl, going for chakra healing, Reiki, energy healing, guided meditation, art journalling, hatha yoga, dance meditation, sunset watching, etc.

All these experiences I’m sure are set to understand & explore more of us, try to find joy within and outside while trying to find meaning in life. There is so much of us that is still left to explore, and there is a high chance we are just letting it go.

Makes me wonder, what are we doing while being on the other side of the world, other than running like headless chickens living the world like “we have been told to”. Who are we? What do we Love, what do we despise? Did we take a minute today to stop by and watch the sunset? Did we take a pause to greet the person who passed by? Did we call that friend to ask if she is doing ok? Did we or we didn’t?

Life is all about living and unfortunately, we are doing everything except that, lost in our deepest worries, and fears, of what might or might not happen.

Are we really doing justice to parts of ourselves that crave to explore beyond this mechanical world we are stuck in today? Are we feeding our souls just right? We might not have our answers until we put ourselves out there and know for ourselves what is that we are missing out.

I’m not much of a traveler myself, although innately I wish to be one. But this travel while it has just started is teaching me so many things, that life couldn’t. To not live in a cocoon, to not stay limited, to try, dare take that step you always wanted to and show yourselves how the world outside is so beautiful & how there are so many things out there that are still left to explore.

Well, I have just started my journey and I know I have so much to learn. I just hope I stay addicted to this part of my life enough to live life this way and not get lost in the usual.

Hoping to hear a lot of amazing stories from all your travel,
so I could stay pinned to this world that is finally making some sense.

With love,
Your N,
This time writing from a place far better than heaven.

How do you find the right love of your life? An unanswered million-dollar question

2023-05-25T09:21:00.004-07:00

How do you find the right love of your life? The unanswered million-dollar question

You can also read the article in medium - link

Unraveling the Enigma of Meeting Your Life’s Ideal Companion

Pretty often we are confused about what we want from someone in a relationship, that we end up hurting ourselves and the other person in the relationship. The way I see it, relationships get messy when both parties are not sure of what to offer and expect from the other person, that it brings in a world of chaos where both parties tend to suffer.

Sometimes people think that there is one single person on the earth who is born for you, who is going to take care of you, love you the way you deserve, and everything in life is gonna be super awesome in life from there. It makes them wonder why I should suffer in life, why can’t God make me meet that person right away, so I don’t go through all this.

I strongly believe timing is everything. “You” today is not the same as “You” 5 years ago, and probably “You” 10 years ago. As humans we are constantly in the process of learning, enriching, deep diving, and consuming life in the way it is. You might be a wrong fit for someone today, but as life happens and makes you go through difficult stuff, it will make you organically undergo a huge transformation that will make you a different person from who you are today.

There are 788 crore people in the world, nobody is born right for you. You have a certain set of life, you meet your friends, you date someone, you fall into wrong relationships, and make terrible mistakes. And then life punishes you and shows you the ugly side, the dark part of the world you never knew existed. It questions your ability to trust the world again and you might probably lose the hope of ever falling in love again.

But then one day amidst this feeling of dejection comes a slow transition, slowly one day at a time you progress towards your healing journey, when you start to reflect on the mistakes you had done, the red flags you missed noticing, the likes and dislikes of your own, and you will figure it out… You will figure out what you want, and most importantly what you don’t want in someone. You become selective wrt who you wanna invite into your life coz by then you’d have realized that the entry of people into your life has a huge toll — The energy they bring in, the influence they have, the changes they could bring; You understand the effect of all of this and you learn to listen to your gut little more, coz you know, your mind/body has now gotten a sense of what fits your life and what doesn’t.

And when you are in that stage, at that point, you will have the ability to filter out the negative energy from your life. You will still make mistakes, it’s not that you have mastered the art of living and have become your perfect version already. It is just, this time, you accept the mistakes & flaws and you embrace them openly like comforting evening embraces breezy zephyr. And it is this open acceptance of your identity, your personality, and your imperfection that makes you the best fit for the world.

And then, when the time is right, the universe will make you meet someone, someone who makes you feel comfortable, feel loved, feel accepted the way you are, someone who doesn’t make you feel anxious or stuck; someone who knows the value of who you are, and treats you just right. You will meet that someone and if it’s destined to be maybe you will end up together.

But even in the togetherness, you will get misunderstandings, fights, and petty issues, coz life is not all rainbows and sunshine. But this time you will know how to navigate through those misunderstandings. Slowly with time, you both will know how to be mindful around your significant other. You will make mistakes, and you will Sc#ew up, but you will still figure it out together. You will always figure it out together.

And do you know why this time, the relationship was not toxic or a wrong fit? It wasn’t because the guy was perfect; It was you. It’s because this time you knew what you wanted. It all started with self-awareness of first you knowing yourselves, who you are, what you want, what you don’t want, and what you wanna attract in your life. When you become conscious of that and mindful of who you wanna let in your life, you will make every effort to ensure it stays a safe space for you and everyone around you.

I hope you are aware of this, if not- there are three attachment styles in a relationship — Anxious, Avoidant, and Secure attachment. And this newly found relationship with this person will be so peaceful that even if you are someone with anxious style, slowly you will adopt secure attachment and for the first time in your life you will feel at “peace”, you will get an understanding of what calmness and peace means. And in that moment you will know, every struggle in your life has made sense this moment, that, it is in all those moments, the good, the bad, the dark, the light, the ugly, the unhappy, and the ones that made you almost give up — it those set of moments that will make you who you are and bring you to this point in destiny — Right Self, Right Partner at Right time.

And in that infinite moment, you will know,
It was all worth it.

Coz this peace,
It’s what you deserved all your life.

When I Met Poetry

2021-12-13T22:13:00.004-08:00

Poetry is the last medicine for bleeding souls.

And it heals you like a magic potion.

First time I had a taste of what masqueraded as love,

First time my heart shattered to billion pieces

First time I learnt about the bittersweet reality called life,

That's when I first encountered poetry.

And when I met poetry,

She came like a soothing quilt in freezing winter,

A long awaited shade in a beautiful summer,

And like the last leaf of autumn.

She came when I least expected her.

And she stayed, like true love.

Like a shoulder I can lean upon,

Arms I could embrace,

And a soul I'd merge into.

And everytime I wrote

She didn't give me smile

She gave me life.

Smoke - It Makes You Fly

2021-07-08T01:06:00.006-07:00

Note: I have always been fascinated by the experience my peers share in terms of their smoking, so I took to personally interviewing some of my friends (almost an ethnographic research) towards getting to understand their world & experience so I could write this post for you all.

Disclaimer: By no means are we encouraging smoking behavior among any age group, cohort. The post is purely written with a mixture of imagination and experience derived from participants in the research.

Credit:Unsplash

Flanked by a confounding number of strangers from diverse walks of life, from diverse vocations, status, mentalities, you have one spot where the probability of 10 completely different people meeting at one random place, become one. It ain't holy, it ain't saint-like, it ain't Christian. Yet it is one that invites a lot of these completely unrelated souls. “Chai Sutta ka Tapri” (Tea kadai with cigarette)

Though there are million other places in the world, a mall, a theatre, a restaurant, or a retail store, this place has something unique about it. However uncommon the customer base is, the experience is innately and inexplicably liberating. Maybe it is the uncommonness that makes the experience so liberating.

Soothing zephyr of night, the chaotic crowd of the evening, unwelcoming warm weather of noon, or unready-yet-ready moment of morning, you call it, there is no moment that isn’t right for it. Maybe all it needs is not a cloudy sky, but a clouded mind to rejoice the disturbingly calm experience the smoke gives. It knows no weather, no vocation, no bucks your empty pocket may encompass. 17 rupees is all it takes to slip away to a seductive world of the sensory state where sorrows sway for seconds

Yelled at by your manager, petty fight with your girl, untraceable stress creeping its way to your soul, a fag makes it fade like it was never born.
“Harmful it is, the soul knows;
Sustainable way it isn’t, the mind knows;
Not a bit healthy, all of you knows;”

Yet your fingers pull them up from a pack of tightly packed army of magic like magnet clasps metal from a messy mess. And you drag like the world around you has faded and it is just you and the fag, in a toxic relationship knowing you are unhealthy for each other, yet not letting go because you can’t see a life without it.

You put it in the between of your lips like “style” in the mid of a flower; you light a narrow streak of fire, that pops at times cute, at times ferocious; And you breathe. You breathe like that was the first-ever time you breathed or your inhaler just worked after million light-years. You know you are taking in a substance made of unhealthy ingredients, yet somehow magically it calms your soul, soothes your mind, with panacea transiently popping in front of your eyes. And you wonder how the way for a healthy solution is sometimes, something unhealthy. Like the way for positivity is a little bit of controllable negativity, like a pinch of salt makes lumps of sweet better.

And you pause for a second and take a look around, you see thousand other messed up souls, associated yet disassociated, tangled yet liberated, standing next to you yet flying in their own worlds

And you think to yourself, “If this isn’t magic, what else is?”

Smoke, it does make you fly; even if it is an inseparable & insanely toxic relationship between the two of you.

Am I in a relationship or not? I don’t know.

But the question is - Are you?

Little Longer, Little Stronger

2021-07-06T04:03:00.002-07:00

Little Longer, Little Stronger

Sometimes life wouldn’t offer what you want,
In fact, it takes away what you already have.
Sometimes it breaks your heart
It could also give you traumas...
Makes you question your existence
And may make you wanna end everything…

But you know what?
It also makes your stay, makes you endure
Makes you look at light at the end of tunnel
Makes you believe in yourself and
Stay a little longer,
A little Stronger…

For deep inside, beyond all those traumas and pain
You still want to wait and feel love if possible
You still hope one day life will bloom
And you will experience Love, happiness and joy
After so long in your life…

Maybe you would,
Maybe there will be giggles and laughter
Maybe you will have shoulders to lean on to
and have your tears wiped as well...
That Day,…
that day you will be glad,
You will be glad,
That you stood when the world expected you to sway,
That you bolstered when they expected you to break,
And so you Smile
You’d see those who wanted to hurt you, cover their face with a shattered smile,
Because you defined your own life.
And you held,
a little longer and a little stronger…

A little longer

And

A little stronger…

Last Few Days of Bachelorhood

2021-07-01T02:05:00.025-07:00

Warning : Phase reaching expiry period :)

Millions of butterflies fly in my tummy as I write this post with utmost happiness reminding myself of the last few days left in bachelorhood. A phase that wasn't spent chilling and hanging out with peers/friends in distant land but spent simply as precious time with most valuable people of life- Family. Parents, Siblings, Cousins, Niece, Nephew and a cute little one waiting to join us soon. The bliss of being with your family after ages and subconsciously migrating to the setup of joint family with your peepz. Well, that is a different kinda joy.

I've travelled to so many cities, states, had different journey but nothing was as rewarding and as reminiscing as time with your own fam jam. People & Experience that are just yours :

- Scolding from dad for mistakes you didn't do
- Unconditional love from mom which you wonder if you ever deserve
- Sisters with whom you get the once in a lifetime opportunity to live together all over again- fight, gossip and cook meals with, play games with, all that fun time that you can’t get elsewhere.
- And as a cherry on top of the cake, two little munchkins who love you a tonne that they keep sketching & coloring something and gift you whether you are sad, happy, doing nothing, doing lot. The kids who don’t fail to show up at your door every evening, "Chithiiiii, yoga time".... Chithi let's make cookies, let's make garlic bread... And the incessant fight- Who loves Chithi more, conclusion to which can never be arrived at... My two pillars, who were my steel at the toughest times of life...

And in this whole lockdown period, whether I was spending my lone time, or fam time, all I wanted was to get soon to the man of my life and start a beautiful life with him.

To love and be loved.
To care and be cared.
To have a little life of my own...
A small tiny world.

But today as I have only few more days left for the D-day I couldn’t quite come to terms with what all I'm going to miss.

- All the lazy mornings where I'd wake up late and still have mom's chai freshly made for me.

- All the evenings where Dad and I would randomly go for a leisurely walk in our street & park which was usually empty due to covid.

- All the times I'd sit with my sisters and talk about random girl stuff, work stuff, makeup, art, food and even share sisterly advises sometimes.

- And all the weekends where all of us in fam would huddle up in terrace with snacks, water, juice and chit chat about random things- family, funny incidents from childhood, what to cook next day, what Aunty told, uncle told, and the incessant teasing each other..

These days, these moments, these experiences, and these people... This is what bliss should feel like.
To be somewhere and to feel belonged..
To know you're truly loved and accepted.
To get lost in your own comfy nest even if it means meaningless drama at times.

Few more days left for me to start a life of my own. One I was looking forward to, and now I'm there, mind can't start to calm itself for a million questions keep popping...

I'm getting someone special in my life...
But I'm also moving far away from other folks who mean a lot to me

How do I let one go, to have another...?
How do I...?

Is this how it's supposed to feel like?
Going away from what was yours to find out
What is going to be yours?

May be ...
May be not....
We'll figure out eventually..

#LOST #ONLY_TO_BE_FOUND_AGAIN\

When I Painted My Hair Red...

2020-03-20T04:36:00.000-07:00

I ruffled through the pages of my diary to figure out when was that moment in history when I made that quirkiest decision of my life. the one I have always been wanting to take. Not for one, two years, but for ages I could remember

Painting my hair Red.

To be honest, the color wasn’t pre-decided. It was anything far from black. And one I wouldn’t regret. But for someone with this desire to color the hair for ages, I hardly made a search to finalize on the precision of vibrancy. I did one thing which 93.45% girls do. Ping BFF. I pinged my best friend who should at least by then block me for my incessantly pinging her and bothering amidst her regular chores. Red may look good on you, she said sharing a few pics, which I took exactly to the bestest salon in the city of Chennai. Trust me, as someone having a hair of good texture (Well, not bragging, if anything I would only tie it to heredity, the fact that everyone in my family has it, from grandfather till granddaughter), the last thing I would do was spend lots of bucks on styling my hair, least of all coloring, one every one in my family was opposed to. Yet, I did. Just like everything else, I do.

I went to one of the best salons at Teynampet, and they made me wait at the bay next to reception, where a few minutes later they sent a tall, handsome guy, who was going to style my hair, that would change my entire one year from then. But the limelight wasn’t any of that, it rather was the woman who sat next to me, with her pre-decided copper blue variant on coloring, and you know who that woman was? Famous Tamil actress “Bindu Maadhavi”. Tinsel town had its crowd walking in and out this salon every now and then. I sat glued at the bay with my eyes lodged onto the sample style, that I showed to Ronald, the guy who was going to color my hair then. Not able to speak the language of a stylist or women who frequent their visits to parlor, I showed him the picture saying, “I want like this, the color, the style and the bottom fadeout, can you do that, can you?”

He looked at it for like 5 seconds, said some terms, and told, “Sure, we can do this.”

“Sure, we can? Exact same?” I reiterated, to which he nodded and we went to the hair cut area which then seemed like Mahal of mirrors of Rajasthan. As someone who thought attention was the last thing she needed, I had in ten minutes, 4 stylists operating on my head. I felt like a patient with 4 neurosurgeons around on a “Awake craniotomy”, but that is little zyada. Yet, I had 4 stylists, one trimming my hair, other holding a tuft in a peculiar angle, and other already getting ready to de-color the black, and one more taking the foils ready. I felt different but as not as different as I was gonna feel a few minutes later. One strand at a time, one tuft at a time, in a dramatic way, I was losing who I was and was transforming to something else or better, someone else, I wondered if I would ever feel the same way when I look into the mirror, or when I take selfie, if it would be different. If so, good different or bad different or whatever. For someone who has thought this hair coloring thing through for ages, I still had too many questions in my head unanswered. Should I stop all of this and walk away, thinking it is not too late to stay the way I am. Just adore the black beauty, and not change a bit of it. But what I didn’t realize was my hair was half way bleached already by the time I was processing these questions and trying to answer each of them, so there Is no going back, else I might as well look like singer Sia Kate, when she had half black and white. So I sat through, tossing few more questions in my head like I just decided to sit through a shaadi without thinking about the guy, and I ruminated over and over. And one good thing to all of this was - the Tamil heroine was seated right beside me. So whenever I took a pause from my mind-breaking thought process, I had my eyes lodged on to her styling process. It wasn’t copper blue. The Color, it was Royal Blue, my favorite color. Only I wouldn’t want it on hair. Royal Blue streaks, good choice, I thought. She was happy, she enjoyed the change she was undergoing, the only thing that would have probably caused her discomfort was the woman next to her, starring without blinking her eyes. So I had to shift attention to elsewhere and it went back to my head. And it was scary because in a few moments from then, I became a barbeque chicken dressed in desi masalas and covered in aluminum foil, except for the fact my head was the chicken and instead of masalas I had bloody beautiful red variant applied all over my hair. I couldn’t help but wonder what if it gets to something like crimson red. Would I be able to live with it?

But hours went by, it started settling in, the sun disappeared, possibly into my hair, lending me some of its redness, and with time I got comfortable too. My questions weren’t questions anymore; they were only moments of wonderment of how my new style was gonna look. The heroine got done with her streaks and vanished like a feather in air, bidding everyone a bye, moment I regretted I didn’t take a selfie with her. Well TBH I can’t look like a barbequed chicken and have my picture clicked next to a cute actress. It might only add salt to suffering. I let the moment pass, as if she and I were neighbors and I might as well see her the next day or the next month. “Remember Red! Hope is a good thing, may be best of things and no good thing ever dies.”Sssh!!! Not to use the beautiful quote from Shawshank Redemption at this mid-life crisis moment, but it still was a perfect fit, Wasn’t it?

“We are ready Ma’am” Ronald said. That is when I realized, they are going to get me to reality. They are gonna wash the magic off my hair only to re-create another version that was going to last forever. Read it right –Last forever, unlike mid 20s relationship. We walked up to the wash bay, with fancy stuffs, which is when I realized I was the last customer left in the parlor. Receptionists, Ronald , and apparently every other soul in Teynampet that time wanted me to get done with this, so they could go back to their home peacefully and get onto their bed whining about this customer who came today with a picture in her hand like a lost kid in exhibition.

The faucet was opened and with every drop that fell onto my hair, I felt I walked close to reality, only this time it’s a new reality and I would have a different dimension, something that is tinted with red. And have the entire world look at me different and stare back at them with the consolation, “Nothing wrong, nothing wrong, they are just starring at the redness of your hair, it is all cool” typical thing any woman had to tell herself when the world is nothing but one giant dot, staring at you like you are spoiled art.

In few minutes it was all done, and I knew I was as scared as I was excited, as happy as I was worried, as red as I was black, and I knew for once, I was ready to look at the newer version, like a chicklet that has just gotten birth. I kept my head down or rather eyes partially shut as Ronald and 3+ stylists then got the hair dried and started curling it. Haa, curling, my favorite part. As someone stuck with straight hair for long, I liked having intermittent curls, one I adore like chai guy adores once in a while ice-cream or vice versa. The curling was done; the setting-the-hair-right part was done. He dropped the comb safely back to where it belonged. And he said the words I was waiting to hear for hours then.
“It’s Done., You may look up now.”

I looked up, still not ready to face the fate I changed for myself. Redness was glaring from crown till curl, the color had changed then completely. There was a smile on my face, one I couldn’t control, one I was trying to hide, I smiled like a kid that cried for candy and got it finally. It went till ears, and that moment I knew I didn’t make the world’s worst decision, I knew I didn’t hate that version of me and that my bucket-list could then be ticked off. I pushed back my red colored voluminous tuft and looked at Ronald and said , "Thank you, that was Job Well-done”.

He smiled and vanished towards the end of his day with glee,
And so me, only with a brighter and redder version of me.

The new face/phase of August

2018-08-12T22:43:00.000-07:00

Oh, I was sitting on the most comforting sofa of my new house in Mumbai and looked outside the window. Our window is too big to be called a mere window, it's more than a door, at times door to the outside world we are all so wanting to go…. It’s the most underrated place as many don’t know the value and magic it possesses. The fluffy pillow, the bouncing to gravity softy sofa, the newly bought plant that blossoms on your face saying you a mandatory hello even if you don’t want to..the aroma from it that mixes with your lovely ambiance making it the most wanted place… All of it just makes this one little-underrated corner of the room, the USP instead…

Put some nice piano music in Spotify, plug your headset in, settle there, and get lost forever!!

For its pure bliss !!

All those things entangled in your mind for so long would start unspinning , the world that meant nothing to you till then would start making sense, you start to see the real world, you see it for it is, what it has given, and what you have taken from it, only this time much better.

People always used to tell, Bschool gives so much pressure, fortunately, or unfortunately, I never felt that last one year, in fact, I thought that statement is rather a myth or is left to pure subjectivity. I couldn’t see stress or pressure anywhere, it was just loads of works getting piled up over and over which any way you had to finish off.

But this August, it wasn’t what it was last year, it is not like any of the last 10 months, it rather came like a refurbished month, a beautifully dressed damsel but with a devilish smile wanting to take everything off you, appearing nothing less than an ultimate synonym of Stress.

Where deadlines become the most heard word.

Where conversation between friends is not “Let’s party” or “Let’s go for a trek”,

but “I’m coming to your house, let's finish this off!!” , “Let’s check the BSC once”

Where eyes don’t roll in not excitation, but in panic.

And in times like those, in days like those, you don’t want anything other than some little space and time for yourself where you can settle in and star at the sky like you have nothing to do.. Get lost in the deepest nothingness of the world from where you don’t want to get back, for all the deadlines are still waiting on the other end.

I’m glad, I’m chuffed, and rejoiced that I have the magical cushion that could cuddle me into a beautiful world and unload me like I’m a newborn ready to hit the road fresh...

What is your magic?

Pic as taken from unsplash, doesnt denote description

Muse From A Distant Island

2018-03-16T20:43:00.000-07:00

I Dont Overthink. I Just Think Without A Gap

2018-03-16T20:34:00.001-07:00

Nothing is going on in my mind

The morning breeze was blowing on my face, and just like every other day, the intricately lined window blocked its passage, like soldiers blocking enemy army, and yet some found their way in. I pushed off my sheets and looked up. It was 7.05 am already. I grabbed a coffee before I could grab my brush, as the incident last night impacted my mind, more than anything would. I tried to throw them off, when I sidled back the coffee and walked down the stairs to get ready for my college. Post pulling myself into a comfortable accouter, I slipped myself to my bike, as I started for college, and there it started, the musings. I crossed a guy sauntering in that hot weather. He was dressed in rags, his skin worn out, I wondered, “Is he a vagabond, why is his teeth red? Did he have pan? Why everybody here has pan? What do they find in it? And before I could finish my thought, a passerby, a fellow traveller spitted his pan onto my pant. I know it didn’t make me furious. Getting furious for pan spit, is like getting furious because a crow has shitted on you. It just so frequently happens in here. So frequently. You just have to wipe off and go. I reached my class little late and I stood there at door, knocking for almost5-6 times. She turned around, threw a reckless look & continued the class. That was very disrespectful. “Is she rude? How can she react like this? She should at least say Get out! Oh wait, there I mistake on my side too? Why did I leave late? Don’t I deserve this? ” And before another thought could find its way to my mind, I learnt she was screaming my name for like 4 times…Niveeedhithaa!!!!Niveeedhithaaa!!!!!!!! I shook myself to reality, “Yeaaaaa Mammmm!!” I gave her the sincerest of apologies and said if she wishes I would leave the class. That’s when she asked me to get in. I placed myself comfortably in the uncomfortable first row, and the whole first row gave me a damn look as if I had occupied their territory. Finance and accounting was running on board, but something else was running in my mind. “What happened to the series I was watching last night? What would have Claire done? Isn’t she awesome? She’s always. Much better than Frank Underwood. Oh wait, what other movies has Frank starred in? They said some American…” And before my mind could build further thoughts on, I stopped for a while, as people were screaming from the last row “Assets, Liabilities, and Earnings”

If my mind was a room, then the thoughts would be the cob web, fragile, yet strong enough to build more upon. Doesn’t matter how much is there already. You still have space for more.

So, I built them one by one, the web, so I could swing by them when I’m jaded by reality. One thought, and then you’d never know where you will land up next.
That's the problem with over thinkers like me.

“H046…H046” she screamed my number to throw couple of questions. That’s when even being lost in class will still be obliterated coz somewhere in your Goddam way you pre-read those Harvard modules your college shared with you before course commencement. I did escape in a narrow manner and saved myself of an embarassment.

Three classes went by like flash, and I just had to drop myself to cafeteria to munch whatever I get. But nothing was scarier than queues there. It was as long as Nile, as crowded as Ranganathan Street, Chennai and as meddled as the cobweb of a dusty room

My friends crossed by, smiling and waving. “Isn’t her shoes awesome? What brand would that be? Does it really match with her dress? Wow, she has an adorable taste!!Doesn’t this look like one in Confessions of a shopaholic? Definitely Yes. Oh that girl in green scarf, how much she loves writing. OH man, I should also write” I took another bite of the vada pav pushing the masalas along with my thoughts.

I slipped fast in a lift and got myself ready to attend an important interview. There were multiple interviews scheduled for the committees of my college and I had to attend one at that point. I was rushing late and somehow reached there on time. I placed myseld in the seat provided . Having a panoramic view of the world around, my mind started to muse again, "Is this girl gonna make it, does her accoutre suit her? Is it gonna give her extra brownie points? Where would she have bought it? Oh wait, Which state is she from? And who is this guy next to her? Boy Friend? Brother? Dont they look alike?" Sshhh!!! The girl next to me Sshheed me as if I was thinking aloud and my thoughts had some sound attached that it really created a turmoil for her.

I was called in for the interview and to my control, I turned the overthinking part off for sometime. Because thinking builds a man, but overthinking? You will never know! I was focused on the interview and she asked me that goddamn question first

“What’s going on in your mind?”

"Me? Nothing!! Really! Nothing is going on in my mind”

A voice inside echoed, “If nothing is the new synonym of “Million things “

Steel for Lifetime

2018-03-07T19:02:00.001-08:00

The New Infanticide

2016-10-06T06:44:00.001-07:00

Following a morning debate with few folks on - why women don’t make it to top positions in the country, this thought crept the inundated mind:

The very reason why women don’t’ make it to top position is not because they are not talented. We all know very much how women stand ahead of men in education.

Women don’t make it to top because they are tied and pulled to a smaller society by a medium called marriage.

Their Society is limited to 3-4 people. Their thinking power is restricted. They are made to think for welfare of the family , than for the welfare of society or country at large.

Their wings are still present but are cut off virtually by the commitments.

If every women is allowed to be who she wants to be and is liberated from her “Restricted Self” , the world will have many women leaders . They will equally compete with Men!

Tying women to homes is not slavery, Restricting their potential itself is one.

So , next time before you ask someone why women don’t make it to top, ask yourselves , “ Am I letting them ?”

DON’T LIMIT A WOMEN’S POTENTIAL.

“Killing A Women’s Dreams Is Tantamount To Female Infanticide”

Disclaimer : Just because I post something doesn’t mean I’m completely going through it. They are my views upon the things I encounter;) Share this article if you like it J

You might also like
>> Shaadi ke Baad Zindagi : http://nivedhitha-quote.blogspot.in/2012/11/shadi-ke-baad-zindagi.html
>> Three Knots Trees You not : http://nivedhitha-quote.blogspot.in/2011/08/three-knots-trees-you-not.html

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