Books, Life n More

Doctors - Proxy Gods or Devils in Disguise?

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Fri, 01 Jun 2012 02:49:00 PDT

It is 4 weeks that Satyamev Jayate started and it was only last week that I watched an episode properly (still couldn’t see full episode but yes better than the past episodes). I can very easily say that it managed to scare me. Not that what had been discussed there was new to me but despite all I had heard and seen I still had an inherent belief in a doctor that, come what may they will not stoop to a level where they will risk a patient’s life.

My hubby is quite suspicious of doctors, so much that I hated his aversion towards them. Last year when BIL fell ill and was admitted everyone in our family reacted in different ways. MIL panicked, FIL was worried but in control, I was worried but believed that he is being treated well but hubby wanted BIL to checkout of the hospital because he felt that the doctors were lying and they were exaggerating his illness because on surface he wasn’t showing the symptoms of the grave disease which was being talked about. He was worried that they would do something to his organs.

At that time I felt hubby was overreacting and that at the end of the day we will have to trust a doctor otherwise there is no way out. Within a month the picture was clearer, he was suffering from Kidney ailment; his creatinine count was very high and doctors recommended Kidney transplant. All that was left on us was too choose a hospital for it. We checked out 3 places in Mumbai, one in Nadiad, 1 in Jaipur, 1 in Jodhpur & one in Nodia. The last two places where we had gone at somebody’ recommendation were the places where the doctors were on honest and told us that transplant can wait easily for some more time, that is unless it is a dire situation. After much deliberation we decided to go with that advice and also prayed that some miracle happens in future.

It has been almost a year and situation though bumpy once in a while but is under control. Few months back however a doctor told my BIL that all these problems (breathlessness->high BP->Affecting kidney) is because of a growth in his nose (sinusitis) and he needs to get it operated. The said operation was minor, done by administering local anaesthesia & would take only 15-20 mins. BIL decided to get the same done in Indore. Last week he & his wife reached Indore and showed at a prominent hospital there and this is what they said,

“Though this operation is minor but as your case is special (high BP & Low creatinin) we would administers complete anaesthesia and you need to be on dialysis before & after the operation.”

Mind you, BIL has till date not been on dialysis because with the help of his wife he has managed to control his life style in such a way that things have not only been in control but have also improved so when the doctors said what they said we were shocked. When we prodded them further they said, dialysis might not be needed but they have to be prepared for all kinds of situation and the expenses would be accordingly. Our antennas shot up.

We decided to consult few more doctors and finally the operation was done this Monday, he was administered local anaesthesia and is on the road to recovery by God’s grace. What if we had decided to agree with the 1st doctor? We would have not only spent unnecessary money but my BIL would have been administered things which were actually not needed and as I came to know later they were trying to club another surgery which was actually not needed.

As I was writing this I remembered another incident (which I feel I might have already talked about here but I am repeating it nonetheless). In Jaipur, my BIL had gone for an overnight test and he felt that the doctor had not done it properly and said so to the doctor. He replied, ‘ya! That day I was in a hurry to attend a marriage.’ He then proceeded to ask how much money was left in BIL’s mediclaim which he gets from office. When my BIL quoted X amount this doctor says, ‘good! we would need X amount only for the operation.’ !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Though small but incidents like these make me doubt the intention of the doctors and the cynicism of hubby doesn’t look without reason. And then when I saw this episode of Satyamev Jayate and heard the horror stories of the people there I had Goosebumps. When we are seriously ill it is the doctor whom we trust. I remember saying so many times to my hubby that the doctor is educated and if he is asking to take me a medicine it won’t be for my bad but is it really true? Does the trust that we put in our doctor, really worthy?

I am not saying that all the doctors in this world are bad but what we cannot deny is that these practises are blooming. I remember that when I was recuperating after my delivery, a teenager was brought in the clinic and her baby was aborted. In fact one of the employees had told us that the foetus which was 4-5 months old was thrown downstairs in the dustbin and she went on to add that the doctor does this kind of operation every once in a while. Trust me when I say my gynaecologist is one of the best in this side of city and if she could do this any doctor could do it. BTW the abortion was not because it was a girl child but apparently the girl had been brought by her employer (who was quite old) and it was some kind of cover up, why am I saying so? If nothing was wrong in the whole process then they wouldn’t have done it at the wee hours of morning as if it is a secret operation.

Next day after that episode when I spoke to few of my colleagues they all had their own set of horror stories to tell. What surprised my however was the No reaction from blogging world. I have so many people in my reader but nobody has talked about the issue, I wonder why. Is it because we are scared that there would be no hope if we stop trusting the doctors?

I mean we need to trust the doctors as there is no other way out and that is why it is better to be in denial than to openly distrust them? I don’t know because even I am confused.

Why I decided to write this aimless post? I was appalled by this

An umbrella body of 21 medical institutions Wednesday asked Bollywood star Aamir Khan to apologize for accusing doctors of malpractices in his TV talk show 'Satyamev Jayate'. Medscape India said the representation of malpractices supposedly perpetrated by doctors was 'rather sad' and Aamir Khan should offer his apologies.

"It is rather sad that doctors should be made the object of such shameless, unilateral scrutiny," Himanshu Mehta, co-founder and advisor to Medscape India, said.

As we try to dodge the Nahin! Missiles Shot by the brat!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Wed, 30 May 2012 03:39:00 PDT

Sometimes I feel time flies so very quickly that we never realise; though I am sure this feeling is relative to what situation we are in. Remember when we were in school we were in a hurry to grow up so that we could take our own decisions and man how slowly the summer vacations would end. A little more grown up we were always in a hurry to stand on our own feet and enjoy the world and used to hate those long winter breaks in college, time crawled back then. But as soon as we enter the oh-looking-so-glamorous-from-outside world of standing on our own feet we crave for the summer vacations we used to have as kids, we crave for time to slow down so that we can catch those precious winks. Alas!! We get what we wished for.

Wondering why I am talking about this? Well, with Arnav in our lives we never have a dull moment and there is a feeling that time is flying, we do not realise and he is growing up, too quickly.

Besides talking nineteen to dozens, the brat has become too smart for his shoes. You know, he has this flap book of ‘Poohie and his friends’. I read it to him as I feed him (that is the reason that you can find pieces of food stuck on it) and animatedly say ‘Arnav tell me who is hiding behind this tree’, I would then turn the flap and exclaim with surprise and tell him the name of the animal. With time he started copying my actions and expressions as well. He would turn the flap and cover his mouth, exclaim ‘hawwww’ and would eventually tell me the name of the animal hiding behind the flap. It was fun to see him doing all that and then he turned the tables on me a couple of days back.

Me: Arnav, please tell me who is hiding behind the fence?

A: Nahin!

Me: *shocked* tell na please.

A: *grinning* Nahin!

Me: Oye! Please tell na.

A: *Very animatedly turns the flap and covers the animals with his tiny hands as if he is hiding secret weapons and says” Nahin!

Go figure!!

Few days back when we had gone for a drive the following conversation happened between Me, Hubby & Arnav.

Hubby: put him in the back seat, he will sit happily.

He was sitting on my lap in the front seat, Arnav that is :D

Me: No re it is ok.

H: Arrey! Listen to me, he enjoys sitting there.

Me: Not when I am sitting in here! I know he won’t sit there alone.

And then we decided to ask the brat himself,

H: Arnav, will you sit peeche?

The brat who had been patiently listening to us says

A: Nahin!

Matter finish, chapter closed.

Gone are the days when you could put him anywhere and expect him to sit silently. He now knows how & when to use the word Nahin and trust me he uses it at strangest time.

And then one day as I was readying him I did some mistake and muttered to myself ‘Mumma bhi buddhu hai’ and the bugger picked it up. Now he goes around the house saying, ‘Mumma buddhu, Daddy buddhu’. Ask him to say Arnav buddhu and he will never repeat it. Smarty two pants!

He has started saying full sentences like, ‘Annao Alibaugh jayenge, bali bali car se jayenge’, prod him further and he will say ‘Daddy car chalayenge, Mumma bhi jayengi.’ If translated it means, ‘Arnav will go to Alibaugh, Daddy will drive the big car, Mumma will also go.’ Before you ask, yes, he is still obsessed with Alibaugh guess we need to make a trip there soon ;)

And then that day he was behind his Dad to show some videos on the ‘kamputer’ but since it was his dinner time, hubby told him that he needs to finish his meal first then only he will show him anything on the computer. So this guy comes to me, grabs my kurta and takes me to the bean bag (where he sits for dinner). Like a very obedient child he eats and as soon as he is done he gets up and goes to his daddy to say, ‘kamputer chalao, bali bali car dakhao’ (switch on the computer and show me the biiiig cars) and sitting on his Daddy’s lap he picks up his shirt to show him his full tummy. No you cannot fool this kid the same however cannot be said about the other way round. vWe will not realise and it will be time to send him to school. Sigh! Time does fly.

Though the same cannot be said about me because from the day I have started controlling my diet the day literally crawls. I feel hungry before I have eaten anything and hungrier after I have finished eating. Sigh!

In other news, I have finally received my Adhaar card and just for info I look horrible in it. I remember telling the guy to re-click my photo because it had not come out nicely and the bugger had said, ‘madam this is not a studio’ and I had so badly wanted to show my tongue to him. The best part in getting this card was that my FIL was the 1st to apply for, I applied a week after him and my Hubby & MIL applied some 20 days later. The beauty was that my hubby & MIL were the first to receive it followed by my FIL and I. Gorakhdhandha I say! To top it their website says our cards are yet to be dispatched. God knows when will we stop botching up.

Botching up reminds me, this post has become hotchpotch no? But I love writing such aimless posts hope you love reading it as well and if you don't you are allowed to say, Nahin!!! I am used to it ;-)

The Edge of Desire

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Tue, 29 May 2012 04:23:00 PDT

Title: The Edge of Desire

Author: Tuhin A. Sinha

Price: INR 195/-

Publisher: Hachette India

Shruti Ranjan, wife of Deputy Commissioner of Kishanganj is raped brutally by the local goon Salim. Their attempts to get justice are stonewalled by the politicians and to add to her woes her character is questioned. She is depressed and even attempts suicide when her hubby in a moment of weakness questions her character.

When Sharad Malviya, the charismatic leader of opposition party shows her a ray of hope she grabs it. With the support of Sharad & her husband Rohit, she contests & wins the Lok Sabha elections. Her only purpose to get into politics was to get justice for herself and she does exactly that. Salim, her rapist is brought behind bars and this when the real trouble begins in Shruti’s life.

Rohit, her husband expects her to leave the political career because he feels that it had served its purpose but Shruti is hesitant. Thanks to Sharad Malviya she grows in politics and is hesitant to leave it.

The novel charts her journey as a politician and how her personal life turns to shambles as she chooses politics over her personal life.

My Verdict

I had high hopes from the book as the topic is quite explosive and had full potential to be a fast paced novel but it is everything but that. Set in lawless Bihar, the book had so much potential but what failed the book was characterisation. Despite the tragedies that our protagonist faces I could not sympathise with her not that she does anything wrong to become strong in politics but it is the way she handles certain situations that you end up feeling she is confused or rather she was using her husband to get over her past relationship and was far too ambitious to even take the half-hearted relationship forward. I somehow could not relate to the flawed protagonist not that I am not flawed but for me to love a book I need to connect/ relate/ empathise with the characters.

The other thing that I couldn’t digest in the book was the quick rise of Shruti, come one she had no political background and the only thing she had going for her was the right mentor but the scale of heights which has been shown achieving in super quick time is IMPOSSIBLE in Indian politics. Plus from being a journalist to a housewife to a politician her journey never shows her as overambitious but suddenly when she leaves everything to serve country, the whole set up looks a tad too convenient.

To add to the woes of the book, post her joining politics the book loses its pace. It becomes a kind of commentary on the issues that had happened in the past which beyond a point becomes boring.

What the book successfully brings across is that woman is the easiest target to malign. Even the purest relationship between a man and a woman can be construed to a level that is beyond imagination. And sadly nobody thinks even for a second that what a woman must be going through when her character is being maligned.

To sum it up, to say I was disappointed with the book would be an understatement. The author had such a good plot line, wish he had decided to tell the story differently.

My Rating 2/5

Weighty Updates!!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Mon, 28 May 2012 04:10:00 PDT

Want to see what I ate on Saturday & Sunday??

All Images courtesy Google Uncle

Have I already broken my vow?? Am I being dishonest to myself? Continue reading here

My Attempt to Lose Weight - A Beginning

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Thu, 24 May 2012 23:12:00 PDT

Off and on I have been talking about my weighty woes. In August 2009, I had delivered Arnav and during my pregnancy I had paid two hoots to the advice that that my weight might increase if I eat too much. I had on the contrary decided to enjoy this once in a life time phase and the free licence to eat anything & everything.

Fortunately for me, I had managed to gain only 13kgs which was quite decent and within limits. Post my delivery I was tied to the bed for 1.25 months and my sweet MIL took care of me and my house in that period. The food that I ate was always light as I was feeding my son at that time and thankfully my weight reduced a bit. After completing 3 months we went off to Chennai i.e. to my Mom’s place and that is where the trouble began. The last trip that I had made to Chennai was of a week and the longest that I had stayed with my parents after moving out for college was way back in the summer of 2002 when I was looking out for a job.

I am sure all of you can relate to me when I say that staying with your own parents has a magic which is irreplaceable. The magic of eating food cooked by your Mom is something which cannot be described in words. I stayed with my parents for almost 2 months and did just three things (besides taking care of Arnav) ate, slept & watched TV the result was such that I added some 4-5 kgs onto my frame and strangely I wasn’t worried about it because everyone around had been saying, ‘eat properly now because you are feeding and don’t worry about weight loss, once you join work you will automatically lose weight’.

Once I came back to Mumbai, I resumed office and expected the weight to disappear itself. Strangely nothing happened; the fat remained as it is. Months passed away and I joined a gym in September with a hope that I will finally lose weight. Unfortunately for me, I have never loved gym as I find it boring but despite my disinterest I was regular for 20 days and then I took one day off. That one day turned to 2 days, 3 days and then a month passed away. I was feeling guilty for being irregular but somehow my legs never took me there. It was in November end that I met my BFF who managed to throw me in the guilt pit. I decided that in a months’ time when I meet her for my birthday I would be slimmer. I resumed gym with a new determination and was regular for a month. Come January I again stopped going there and this time I was shameless, I didn’t even renew my membership. The gym manager was asking around for me because when they had opened the office gym during office hours I was the happiest person on this earth.

I didn’t go there and came up with an excuse, ‘I get bored of gym so I have decided not to waste money but I will do something else myself and lose weight’. What a nut case I was because I just thought but never acted. I did ABSOLUTELY nothing to lose weight, I didn’t control my diet; on the contrary I was on full on eating mode because I felt I am already fat what more do I have to lose, I should at least enjoy my life. As it is I will be losing weight tab sab chala jaayega.

Who was I kidding? The whole situation was getting scary, in the heart of my heart I knew that what I was doing was not right, that I was hurting myself in the process and should stop the relentless/ shameless piling on of weight. I was also realising that hiding behind ‘I was pregnant’ or ‘I am too much a foodie to diet’ were excuses which sounded lame to even my ears. I was waiting for a warning or rather jhatka which would shake me out of the reverie.

And it came around a fortnight back when the suit which I had taken recently (post the weight gain) felt a little tight around my waist. It was also quite visible that I was having trouble in getting up. If that wasn’t scary enough nothing else could be. And then there were random comments from people. I know a bunch of people whom I meet regularly at CCD and after he saw me after a month he made a random comment, ‘start walking & stop eating ice creams, thoda weight kam ho jaayega.’ Though I laughed out at that time but honestly I was ashamed.

These things plus a couple of more random incidents were trying to wake me but I knew one thing; gym is something that I was very difficult for me to pursue in the long term, I could always resume my aerobics class but that would mean leaving home 2 hours before my usual time and whenever I thought about it Arnav’s face would appear before me. The only alternative in front of me was diet control.

Thus on Monday morning I decided to call a cousin of mine who is a dietician by profession and is supposed to be very good at her work in fact she too has delivered a baby just a year before me so she kind of knew what I was going through. It took me some time to convince her that I was serious about weight loss (I am sure she must be getting panicked calls from people who want to lose weight but do nothing about it).

She promised to help me on one condition, that this plan would not be a one off thing for me, she expected me to make a commitment and be serious about it. I decided to take the plunge and thus began my Weight Control Program.

But me being me I decided that the way people have a Bachelors party before marriage, I too would have an eating party before I begin dieting. Yes, I am shameless that way. So that day I ended up stuffing myself so much that I was buried under guilt. In a way it was good because it increased my determination to beat the greedy foodie in me.

The challenges that lay ahead of me

I am supposed to drink a glass of milk daily as apparently for my blood group milk reduces weight. You can read my views about Milk here. I hate milk and this is the biggest hurdle I crossed yesterday night. I hope to continue the determination.

I have to say No to potatoes. Unfortunately I live on them. Surprisingly this is my fourth without them.

I have to eat a fruit a day. Unfortunately I hate them. Surprisingly I have already 2 eaten apples in past 4 days.

I am supposed to have dinner before 8:30 pm. I thought that was never possible but from last 2 days I eat as I feed Arnav.

Today it is the fourth day and I have been following the regime strictly and have realised that it is all in our minds. If we really wish we can change ourselves the only thing that we need is determination. I hope I manage to be strict with myself.

I have also decided to chronicle my weight loss through a diary. I have added a page on the blog and will try my best to update it daily.

Wish me luck and share your weight loss stories because that would encourage me.

Between the Headlines

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Thu, 24 May 2012 03:32:00 PDT

Title: Between the Headlines

Author: Shweta Ganesh Kumar

Price: INR 125/-

Publication: Good Times Book Pvt. Ltd.

Satyabhama Menon works for N.E.W.S, India’s premier new channel. After having worked at the backend, she was dying to be in front of the camera and to be in the thick of the news. When opportunity knocked in she readily moved to Bengaluru as reporter. Initially forced to do some inconsequential reports, Satya starts carving a place for herself in the office. She starts enjoying her job, that of bringing the truth in front of the nation when the changes begin to happen.

Her news channel decides to focus on CRIME which is the only story that sells. In the process they compromise the basic sanctity of journalism and that is when the unrest & frustration creeps in Satya.

Will she survive the crime wave or will she move out towards something else which might be her true calling?

Read the book to know more.

My Verdict

Written in flashback the novel traces the journey of Satya. The book gives us a rare insight towards how a news channel functions. The channel Vs reporter conscience has been captured quite well here and gives you an insight that though we all curse the reporter for showing us non news but the fact is that they are working under the dictates of their bosses for whom nothing matters beyond TRP & money. The book also captures the office politics quite well.

The book reminded me of Earning the Laundry Slips by Manreet Sodhi Someshwar, which was the story of a girl who joins HLL and tries to break through the male dominant sales market. A lovely read it was and the same can be said about this book. A well written book which keeps you glued all the time and as I said gives a rare glimpse of the insides of a greedy newsroom.

I loved the book for its simple yet gripping narrative and the innocence which is there in the whole proceeding making the book a worthy read. A light book but with a message that it is never too late to chase your dreams and I am sure most of us relate to that feeling.

My Rating 3.5/5

Reservation Via Tatkal - A Takal Solution Needed

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Fri, 18 May 2012 00:33:00 PDT

Have you ever tried your hands in getting reservation through Tatkal? I have several times and my success rate is say 50% which if you compare to my hubby’s success rate which is 0%, is very good. This is the very reason that I am called in for trying Tatkal reservation whenever the need arises. I have always said this thing that getting a reservation in Tatkal is like getting a lottery because there are so many hurdles before you that it gets frustrating. Let me list them here

If you log in before 8 AM and try reservation after the gates open up the site automatically logs you out. Never seen this happening with any other E Commerce site.
If it isn’t your lucky day (which never is) it will not let you log in before 8:15 by when all the tickets would be taken.
By any chance if you manage to log in it will not display the station codes.
If by chance station codes are displayed it will get stuck at displaying date and dare you refresh you will be logged out, so restart the process.
If your stars are shining it might even display the trains to you but it will get stuck in showing seat availability.
Once I had managed to cross all the above hurdles and entered the details but you know got stuck where? ‘Verification Code’ which comes at the end of the form, no I am not kidding. It never displayed the verification code and then logged me out automatically because of time out.

My Bhabhi & nieces were to leave for Chennai today morning from Ahmedabad. There is just one train between the two cities and their reservation was in waiting which finally crawled on to RAC but since the journey was too long and she was travelling with two little kids we decided to try our hands at Tatkal yesterday morning. My dad was trying in Chennai, I was trying in Mumbai and brother was trying at Jamnagar. As far as my luck was concerned all the above points mentioned happened with me i.e. I was unable to log in. My Dad called me at 8:05 AM (note the time as Tatkal opens at 8 AM) and told me to quit trying, I said why? It is just 5 mins into 8 and what he told me was shocking. Within 2 mins of the Tatkal gates opening the quota of 60 seats came down to 20 seats and by 8:05 tatkal went into waiting list, Mind boggling.

I was unable to login, my dad was unable to log in and I am sure that if 30 people would have been trying to access the site they would have also said “we are unable to log in” then where did the seats go? Did the brokers book the seat? Read on.

We then decided to wait till 7 pm (the train was today at 6:30 AM) before cancelling the RAC tickets and unfortunately nothing happened. We decided to cancel the plan and try for Tatkal for the coming days but since we were sure that it would be difficult to get the same through the efforts of us lesser mortals, I decided to use my old contacts in Ahmedabad and managed to speak to a broker and this conversation happened.

Me: Rasesh bhai, do you deal in railway tickets?

RB: Yes ma’am, for which location do you want the tickets?

Me: Ahemdabad to Chennai

RB: Not possible ma’am, I am sorry.

Me: not even in Tatkal?

RB: Ma’am there is some setting there, tickets vanish in 2 mins. I am really sorry for saying no but it is not possible.

Disappointed and shocked I disconnected the call and called another contact in Gujarat. As per him his broker was reliable and had never disappointed him and he would get back to me by 10 next mornings. Though I was not very hopeful but I decided to be positive.

Back at bro’s home, my niece was crying and my Mom in Chennai was pretty disappointed because in last 20 days two of our close relatives have passed away and my Mom was pretty depressed about it. She had pinned her hopes on this visit and even I was expecting that the visit would cheer up everyone.

Today when I received the call that I was waiting for I got the expected response. My colleague was however very shocked, he informed me that the broker had immediately said no, he had told that getting Tatkal in Navjeevan express was impossible. My colleague was shocked because this guy had never disappointed him and had given him confirmed tickets in dire circumstances as well.

Post all this, if I say my blood is boiling then that won’t be wrong. The ba******s open the ticket booking four months before the travel date, now tell me how can people who are working and whose leaves are decided at the last moment book tickets 4 months in advance? Today only I randomly checked the availability (Ahmedabad to Chennai) for 19th August the result was waiting list. Bloody train is full 4 months beforehand?

What if somebody has to travel on an emergency? How does one get a ticket? Tatkal via home is like I said a lottery, if you go to a broker he charges anywhere between 200 to 500 Rupees for a ticket! We are as it is paying extra money for a Tatkal ticket and these buggers charge you so much over & above that.

You might say go to the counter and get a ticket? Well, my Dad did exactly that when they had to book a ticket from Delhi to Chennai. They were in Rishiskesh & fixed this up via a broker and will you believe that the queue for next day Tatkal started building up at 10 pm? My Dad’s fellow was 2nd in the queue and they just managed to get a ticket (their first preference was already into waiting list). In fact one broker had told me point blank that it is better to try through home because nowadays there is no guarantee to get a ticket at counter as well.

My friend tells me that once he had gone to his brokers office and worked on his PC and never faced any problem which we face when are trying from home. He tells me that his broker friend has 5 people working under him who just book 5 tickets in morning and earn 2500 rupees out of it. His servers & log in is different from ours and they never face trouble like we do.

What I fail to understand is that why is Indian Railways existing? To provide economic and speedy travel? But it does everything but that. In the name of easing things they have created so many hurdles in a common man’s path that getting a legitimate ticket is next to impossible. They have given us a fancy website but it never works when it needs to. They say that they have given us flexibility by opening reservations 4 months in advance which is creating more problems than solutions. They have supposedly increased the quota for Tatkal but those tickets when needed are not available. Who is gaining from all this?

The quota which has been increased in tatkal has been taken out from general seats which means those tickets were available for normal price but are being sold at higher price.
They charge extra money for tatkal.
They do not cancel tatkal tickets which means if your seat is in waiting the money will go to the railway.
They give you waiting in Tatkal which cannot be cancelled. Where does the money go? No prizes for guessing the answer.
They do not extend the benefits usually attached to senior citizens & children in tatkal tickets so they are minting money there also.
Earlier Tatkal was booked from source station to destination station which prevented the misuse of the facility. Now for long distance travels people do not get tickets because people book tatkal tickets for short distances and block the seats.

And despite all this we still do not manage to get tickets, why? Because the system is not made for us, it is made for Railways to mint money.

And who will think about the common man? The common man who has every right to travel anywhere in the country but is unable to do so because the system doesn’t allow it.

I have seen so many people cribbing about the issue, I also see random news of some racket being caught but what happens after that? The problem still persists! Who will give us answers and solve the persistent issue?

What I need to know is how do we wake this incompetent sleeping system? This system which is so busy in making money that it forgets the purpose of its existence! Do you have any answers? I am sure no! But what I am sure is that you have experiences which I urge you to share here.

Of Paani Puri's, Potty & Cars!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Tue, 15 May 2012 00:42:00 PDT

Last to last week we had some relatives visiting us and we decided to have chaat program, chaat bole to not the virtual one but the eatable version ;) and in preparation of that I made Aloo Tikki’s, Imli ki chutney, hare dhaniye ki chutney, hari matar, all the stuff for golgappa i.e. aloo, khatta paani and then other Knicks n knacks. When the aloo Tikki’s were sizzling on the tawa hubby came in with a packet of golgappa’s and I proudly showed the golden brown tikki’s to him expecting a word of appreciation. After the required ooh’s and aah’s I told him

Me: I think I should professionally start making & selling chaat.

Him: Really? With the way you make the stuff it won’t be a profitable business.

Me: As in?

Him: if you use good quality stuff you will not earn and you cannot sell it at the market price.

Me: Why not? See you got this paani puri packet for 50 bucks? It has 100 pcs and if I sell one plate for 10 bucks I will get the money back in 5 plates only.

By then I started thinking how I behave in front of a paani puri wallah after he is done with his 6 puris a plate and one free sukhi puri.

Bhaiya, ek aur sukhi puri dena na!

Aap bahut acchi banate ho ek aur dena na.

Arrey bhaiya bacche ke liye ek sukha golgappa dena na.

What I didn’t realise was that I was thinking aloud and hubby joined in

Arrey bhaiya bacche ke liye ek aur dena and then your son will say “uncle uncle” and he will give one more golgappa to him.

Shudders!!! It is crystal clear with customers like me around; this business is not for me. Please tell me I am not alone in this torture that we inflict on the poor chaatwallah’s and let me not even think that it is because this that they cut cost and start supplying susu puri’s.

On other front Arnav is getting naughtier day by day and has discovered the joys of digging his nose. I am partly to be blamed for that because when he wouldn’t let me touch his nose to clean it I started telling him that it has “kachra” (dirt) in it let Mumma clean it and rest as they say is history. I have to keep telling him not to touch his nose but he outclassed himself when he dug something out of it, looked at it said “kachra” and tried putting it in MY mouth. I yelped and saved myself in the nick of the time.

You can say that my reaction was a little subdued but then that comes from the fact that by offering me his potty to eat, not once but twice, this lad has prepared me for worst. The first time he did it was when he was onto doing potty and suddenly in a matter of seconds he wiped a piece off the floor, tried putting it first in his mouth (I saved him by whisker) and then he tried offering it to me. I remember going ewww!!

The second time when he did it I was saved by a whisker and ended up screaming which in turn offended the young boy and he started crying. Ya, I had refused to eat something that he had offered so sweetly, bad mom I am. Now we have educated him that potty is something which is not supposed to be eaten. Joys of motherhood I tell you.

Did I tell you that he is still obsessed with Alibaugh? When I reach home in the evenings and ask him, “what did you do the whole day?” his response is fixed, “car & Alibaugh” which means he played with car & went to Alibaugh!

His vocabulary is increasing day by day and obsession with car is getting scary. When he is playing with them he forgets eating, sleeping & anything else. Will you believe that he makes them sleep also? He would upturn the car and pat it saying “ninna, ninna”. In an effort to make him sit and do potty I started keeping the cars in a vertical position and told him, ‘see even cars sit and do potty’. So now his cars basically go brrrr!, then they go to sleep and in between do potty as well ;-) such human cars we have!

Car reminds me, that day when we had gone to big bazaar there were this set of small cars on display right in front of the lift so that kids do not miss them. As soon as my brat saw them he grabbed a set. Hubby was against buying it because he had already broken one set which his naani had brought but then we finally decided to buy it for him because they were reasonable priced (joys of marketing!). The bugger wouldn’t leave the set he had in his hands & was even trying to extract one car out of it. While hubby was handling him I was standing in the queue to get our stuff billed (cannot tell you which was a tougher) and when our turn came hubby got another set of car for billing because we knew that if we took the one with which he was playing he would scream and crate a scene. No we cannot control him and take the easy way out, ~~bad~~ smart parents we are!

Post the billing we started moving towards the elevator when I saw a girl sitting in a trolley and crying at the top her voice, her mother pointed towards me & Arnav (who was busy playing with his cars) and said “see that bhaiya, he is such a good boy is he crying?”

I laughed out loud and said to her, ‘wait & watch’ and with that I took away the car set that he had in his hands (remember the one we had bought was packed in our stuff?) and bang on he started crying ‘Car! Car! Anaao ki car’ it was after much coaxing that he decided to see the other set that we were offering to him.

Earlier when I used to see kids crying over games in a mall I used to feel can the parents not control their kids? Now I know better!

Such is life, it teaches you with experience and tells you repeatedly, don’t judge others before you really know what they are actually going through. And not to forget you reap what you sow!!! So very true specially in context with parenthood.

A Curious Indian Cadaver

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Mon, 14 May 2012 03:36:00 PDT

Title: Inspector Singh Investigates: A Curious Indian Cadaver
Author: Shamini Flint

Price: INR 350/-

Publisher: Hachette India/ Piaktkus

Inspector Singh is on a sick leave and not loving it a bit. So when Mrs Singh proposes that they should better utilise the holiday and attend the marriage of her cousins daughter he cannot refuse. All he was expecting from the wedding was some nosey relatives and loads of tasty food (yes Mr Singh loves food) but what he had never expected was that he would be solving a murder mystery.

Upon reaching Mumbai shock is what they had when they were informed that the bride was missing. When Mrs Singh doesn’t leave the opportunity to inform her relatives that her husband is a famous inspector in Singapore, the grandfather (a famous business tycoon) of the bride wishes that Inspector Singh should investigate the case. They do not want the local police to be involved because with the wedding just 2-3 days away the case had the potential of becoming a major controversy.

A body is found & identified by the brother but people close to Ashu (the bride) find it difficult to digest that a girl like her could commit suicide thus forcing Mr Singh to investigate the cause behind it.

Was the bride murdered? Or was it honour killing? Too many suspects, too little motive, a strangely behaving brother & safely stashed boyfriend. Mr Inspector has his hands full, will he manage to solve them mystery?

Read the book to know more :-) and do read it.

My Verdict

This is my second book in the series and I had found the previous one pretty average. But this one is much better and makes for a good read. A taut thriller, well written & entertaining is how I will define the book. What works in its favour is that the inspector is not your smart, tall dark & handsome fellow but a potbellied middle aged man who works on his instincts which makes the whole thing believable.

*spoiler alert*

The only thing I didn’t like was the amateurish handling of the whole terror attack angle. Though the motive behind it was strong enough but the whole handling was a little kiddish.

*alert ends*

All in all a good page turner with enough twists & turns to want you finish this book in one sitting. Go read it.

Rating 3.75/5

The Lost Story

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Thu, 10 May 2012 04:25:00 PDT

Title: The Lost Story

Author: Amit Goyal | Sudhanshu Gupta

Price: INR 200/- (Available for INR 150/- @ Flipkart)

Publisher: Grapevine

When Sandy, an aspiring author sends one of his best story to Saleem Afzal who has been his role model, what he expected was a word of appreciation at most but what he ends up getting is a chance to meet him in person. His happiness has no limits and thus he lands at Saleem’s step on the appointed time.

Saleem has not published a novel for last 23 years and in Sandy he sees an opportunity, he makes an offer to Sandy which no aspiring writer can refuse. He proposes a novel idea where each writer writes one half of the story, leaving it for the other to finish and thus they embark upon a journey which is akin to the game of cat & mouse.

While writing these stories Sandy is intrigued by Saleem, a man of few words (verbally i.e.) is a mystery which Sandy takes upon himself to solve. What he uncovers could change his life and could free Saleem from the clutches of the past. A past which has left him crippled psychologically, crippled in a manner where he is unable to finish stories & hallucinates about the characters of the stories he writes.

Will Sandy be able to help Saleem?

Will he discover the mystery behind Saleem?

And what is THE lost Story that Saleem keeps referring to? What is the mystery behind the locked room in Saleem's house?

Read the book to know more.

My Verdict

When I had picked this book I was under the impression that it will be a collection of short stories but to my pleasant surprise the stories have been in such a way in the narrative that you will not feel that these are short stories that we are talking about.

Each story in itself is a gem, ranging from a haunted house, to the story of a man who is on his way back of home to meet his lovely wife but the journey is turning out to be a nightmare, to the simple story of finding love in all conditions; the stories have been written well and give you many thrills & chills. The ending though is a tad unbelievable takes you by surprise.

Few things that I need to write in bullet points about this book

The book in reality has been written by two authors and they have followed the concept of the book. Started by one finished by other, amazing concept no?
The book brings forth a concept, what happens to writers for whom the characters become their life, what happens to them when they start living the story they write? How would you feel to be trapped inside what you had created and when everything else ceases to exist for you? Scary no? This is the very concept that this book explore beautifully.

A must read because is a daring book which explores ideas & concepts which are new & different as far as Contemporary Indian Writing is concerned.

My Rating 4/5

The Blackheads of my Life!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Tue, 08 May 2012 00:42:00 PDT

I have never been a fan of visiting beauty parlours unless I am in dire circumstances. When I do visit them it is mainly for a haircut or pedicure but post my delivery even that is not happening. I can go to the extent of saying that I have never been conscious about my looks not even when I was a teenager and garnering the attention of male species was deemed to be critical.

In hostel the other girls used to have a very strict beauty regime. One Sunday they would be applying Mehndi on their hair, the other Sunday would be booked for applying dahi all over their body etc. I was usually a mere spectator of those things and would rather spend time reading a book. Unless I was forced to I would never do any of these things and yes there were times when I was tempted to try either of the stuff but eventually gave them up because I didn’t have the patience for them.

Would you be shocked if I tell you that till date I have never had my upper lips done & neither have I got my eye brows shaped ever? Thankfully in both the cases I am blessed naturally & I am not a mobile jungle. 8-9 years back I would hardly visit a beauty parlour and the only visits that I would make would be for a haircut but that too was avoided with the excuse “parlours are closed on Sundays”.

It was in 2003 that I found a parlour in Ahmedabad that was open on Sundays and the lady there introduced me to the concept of “Face Clean up”. While she was trying to sell it to me I was clear that I do not want bleach (My Mom had strictly told me not to try that as it would spoil the face) & it was only after much deliberation and assurance from her that bleach would not even touch my face that I got ready to get cleaned.

It was during that first face clean up that I got introduced to the creatures called “black heads”, I cannot forget how she removed it them from my nose. It was such a painful process that I had tears in my eyes. The lady very sympathetically told me that since I had never had them removed before it was taking time to go away and that I should get them removed regularly to avoid such a situation in future. After that I have been very conscious of black heads. My hand would inadvertently go to my nose to check the roughness of it. I started reading about it and would look out for products to use to remove them and the only thing that I could find was some “blackhead remover caps” which you need to stick on your nose for some time and then remove it.

You would laugh at me when I tell you that I have even lost some sleep over it, no seriously. I would lie sown to sleep and my hand would touch my nose and then rest is history. The only other thing in my body that had affected me like this before was split hair. I remember that for a year I had lapsed in taking care of my hair (before that I would regularly apply curd or eggs on them) and didn’t even bother to trim them. Result was that I had split hairs which didn’t even go when I had a trim. I remember sitting on my desk at office and twiddling with my hair, finding a split hair and cutting it either with a scissor & if that wasn’t handy I had even chewed them off. Eventually I went in for a boy cut to solve the situation. I avoid falling in the same situation with blackheads because though they are small creatures but they have the capacity to give immense pain.

They have now become a part of my life; a part which I know exists and needs to be removed periodically. That is why I keep touching my nose, keep postponing visiting a parlour it is only when I feel it is too thorny that I take out time and rush to the nearest parlour to subject myself to absolute torture and then I promise to be more proactive the next time but never keep the promise.

This was the very reason that the mail from somebody from Garnier caught my attention. I have accepted books for review but I have never accepted or rather received any requests for writing about an ad campaign of a product but since the product was something about “blackheads” they had my attention.

Garnier Pure Active has come up with a campaign where they are trying to educate people about blackheads. To quote them

Talking and educating people about Blackheads is not the easiest task to accomplish. So Garnier Pure Active has come up with a campaign that will not only educate the audience but also engage them in a way never done before. So after a lot of outrageous thinking by some imaginative people, Garnier Pure Active has unveiled the Bust Blackheads Campaign.

The thought behind it was to get the Blackhead talking! Give an identity to the blackheads and educate the audience through quirky characters, instead of going the usual preachy way. How is that done?

Design characters that are likeable yet have a personality annoying enough for them to eventually die at the hands of the hero the “Blackheads Uprooting Scrub”. The task is to ensure that when a person sees these characters, he knows they are ‘Black Heads’ in the true sense of the word. In order to engage the users, the brand will be running a series of contests and fun interactive quizzes which allow Fans to be a part of Faceville and interact with them.

For this campaign they have created some funny posters and even given names to the blackheads, sample these pictures.

I agreed to write about this on my blog because blackheads are a problem which I have never managed to fight with and I feel that we seriously need a product which can help us fight the devils. You can read more about the campaign here http://www.facebook.com/GarnierPureActive

Here is a link to Faceville’s Weekly newspaper http://www.facebook.com/GarnierPureActive/app_339015726161647

I just hope that the product is as good as the campaign ;-) waiting to use it.

Home Search Chronicles -Part IV-Getting the Loan Disbursed

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Fri, 04 May 2012 03:26:00 PDT

You can read the Part I, II & III of the story here, here & here.

Warning: Long Post Ahead

If the last part of the series was dedicated to the brokers of the city then this one goes for the bankers. After much searching around, organising & re organising our finances we had found our dream house. No, change it house because my dream house would ideally be a quaint bungalow and would be located at a foot hill, If wishes were horses. Sigh!

Visit to the builder’s office was made, bargaining done and deal finalised. When I see in retrospective I feel we could have bargained more but then that’s the beauty behind bargaining, you always feel you could have bargained better. So post the handing over of the signing amount the dealer’s person told us that once we give them the Pre-Approved loan letter from the banker the registration of the house would be done & within a month of that we would need to make the 90% payment. We assured them that there is no need to worry as we were model citizens and our loan would happen in a jiffy. When he asked which bank we were thinking to go to, we told him SBI. To which his reaction was quite negative, in fact he tried his level best to dissuade us from going to SBI because as per his experience SBI was very slow. We however were clear that we wanted to go to SBI as many people had given us the feedback that they are the best post the loan is taken. We applied for the loan in the end of November 2011 and thus began our journey.

I had an SBI branch in our office and therefore the responsibility fell on me to apply for the loan. Apply I did and knowing quite well that follow up would be needed to get our things done quickly, I started building pressure on the SBI officer, “Amol” from day one. He had assured me that the initial approval, which decides how much loan we are eligible for would come in 7 working days.

We filled in all the forms, gave all the necessary documents and the wait began. 7 days turned into 8 days turned to 10 days and finally the approval came in 15 days.

When I confronted Amol he had a feeble reason saying that our loan officer was unwell. We decided to let it pass and started the formalities for the registration which happened on around 20th December and post that we got a letter from the builder stating that we would need to pay the balance eligible amount by 25th January 2012 failing which they would charge us some interest.

We submitted the registered agreement & other required documents at the bank by 24th December 2011 and the wait began again. Every 2nd day I would visit the bank branch and would ask him the status. Amol confirmed that it should take maximum of a fortnight and we would receive calls from various verification agencies. The point to note here is that our branch forwarded our file to their home loan division on 28th, it took them that much time to verify the data and to top it their branch manager was transferred and new one had not joined.

On 2nd January I received a letter from SBI Jamshedpur stating that our loan has been sanctioned and we should contact our local branch to complete the formalities. We were very happy because all this was done in a record time, the fact that letter had come from Jamshedpur did confuse us but we were not ready to let it dampen our spirits. Next day when I went to the branch with that letter, water was splashed on our hopes.

As per Amol, the letter was some kind of system error because it is impossible that the loan could be approved so soon. He took a copy of the letter and told me that the processing would take more time. On 7th January we received a letter from builder stating that if we failed to make the payment by due date, they will charge us an interest of 18%.

Armed with that letter I reached my bank, I decided to play cool and once Amol had read the letter I fired him. Demanding to know what was the status of our file and would the bank pay us the interest that would be charged to us for the delay? Thankfully by then a new branch manager had joined in and the matter was escalated to her. They again made a copy of the letter and decided to escalate the matter. After getting an assurance that they will personally get our file processed at the earliest I came to my seat.

After continuous follow up; on 14th my hubby received a call from a valuator. Apparently he was a 3rd party valuator who was going to inspect our property and was just informing my hubby about his movements. That call gave us some relief that at least things were moving and when I visited the branch I grilled them about the status of the loan (I continued building pressure on them because they had proved time and again that they are no better than government offices) and you know what I was told?

The officer who was working on our file had been temporarily transferred to some other department and once he is back on Monday he would work on our file. To say I was angry would be an understatement, I blasted them. First he falls sick, and then he sits on our file for 10 days only to go away at the last moment. Despite my insistence they were not ready to transfer the file to someone else and requested me to wait till Monday, that would mean just 10 days in for disbursement, it already looked like a losing battle to me.

Monday I camped at the bank and the branch manager assured me that she is on the case and would get everything done at the highest priority and further she promised that the disbursement will happen on time. On Tuesday morning I went to the branch to meet Amol and as soon as he saw me he said “Ma’am good you came, I just now received a call from the loan branch saying that page no 8 from your registered agreement is missing, can you please give us a copy of that?”

When I had made a copy of the registered agreement I had made 3 copies of which one was given to the bank, 2nd was left at home & fortunately I had one with me at office. Though it is beyond me that 2 out of 3 copies had that relevant page but the agreement which was given to the bank didn’t have it? When I went to give the copy of the missing page the BM tells me, “Ma’am I have just now received a call from the loan branch that you need to open a joint account with us otherwise the loan won’t get processed.”

I was furious; I had converted my Savings account with SBI to a salary account because that was the pre-condition to avail some discount and now at the last moment they say this. After apologising to me profusely, she started the process of opening a joint A/c at her branch. At around 4 pm I got a call from her asking me to come to the branch and she informed me that, “the valuation report had come in and their valuator had valued our property at a value which was approx. 30% less than the value we had paid for the property.” Which effectively meant that the loan disbursed would be around 70% of what we wanted. I almost had a mini heart attack.

We spoke at length and she said the following things.

The difference in calculation stemmed from the fact that our agreement had carpet area mentioned in it (which is always less than the super built up area) and the valuator had only added the built up area to it and calculated the rate.
If we could get a letter from the builder stating the super built up area things MIGHT work.
She could get an opinion from another valuator and put up the case for a re look but chances of things changing were bleak as the branch would never increase the amount of loan.
In the whole Vashi area SBI had lost the business of 3 crores because of this difference in valuation.
She said that she is fighting for our case and things would get clear by next day.

I & hubby discussed the whole thing at length and decided to wait till next day. My instincts were however working overtime and I decided to go by them, immediately I got in touch with my contact in HDFC (I was always interested to take loan from them but for hubby it was choice 2) and went to visit them. I told her the story and asked her that how soon she thinks that the loan would be processed. She promised that she can get it done by month end in any condition. I took a list of all needed documents from her and went home.

Next day I & hubby camped at SBI and had a heart to heart with the BM who was in touch with her seniors & she reiterated the points she had said earlier. In fact she called up two valuators in front of us, of them one valued the property as per the rate we had paid and the other valued it at much less value.

We talked talked & talked but knew that this wasn’t leading anywhere. The BM called up her senior who told us to wait till 3-4 PM because they were holding a meeting on this issue. What I would want to highlight here is

As a practice builders in Navi Mumbai write just the carpet area only in the agreement and our builder refused to give the super built up area in writing.
The agreement was already registered which meant we had agreed to pay that much amount to the builder so there was no case of writing an increased value. THIS MEANS WE WERE NOT AT FAULT, THE ONLY POSSIBLE ISSUE WE CAN SEE HERE IS THAT SINCE WE WERE PAYING IN FULL WHITE THE VALUE WAS MORE. Price to pay for being a model citizen?
We had given every possible document to the bank and yet they managed to lose some important ones at the last moment.
When we contacted HDFC we were told that there would be no issue with valuation which meant problem was with SBI only.
BM was in a way saying that despite their efforts chances are bleak that the branch would go back to their word and accept a higher valuation of the same property.
A tipoff from the builder gave us the info that the owners of the flat right above ours had taken an SBI loan from the branch and the valuation was in line with the market value. Despite our efforts to make them use this case as a benchmark the bank didn’t relent.
As a practice if a property is valued once the value should be used for all future loans of the same property but SBI doesn’t believe in that. They would rather waste time on valuing it again & again and even charge the customer for it.

We left the branch in a worried state of mine and pondered. The loan request to HDFC was duly signed and ready with us. If we submitted it before 3 then the loan process would start the same day. Hubby left for his office and I came back to my desk. He wanted to wait & I wanted to apply, thankfully better sense prevailed and I rushed to HDFC with all the papers and applied with them on the afternoon of 18th January. I had already given them the background of the whole thing and even told her that if by chance SBI decides to change the approved amount we will have to stop the process and fortunately they were ok with it.

At 4 O’ clock I received the call I had been waiting for. The BM with regret informed me that they will not be in a position to increase the disbursed amount and wanted to know whether we would accept the sanctioned amount. I controlled myself and told her that it is impossible for us to arrange the balance funds so we decline the loan and asked her would they be refunding the amount (Approx 11K) that we had paid to them in the form of various processing fees? She replied in negative saying that they have approved the loan and it is us who were declining it. Though she was sounding apologetic but I was furious. We had just 1 week in our hand to make payment to the builders and these worse than government employees had spoiled everything.

By evening I went to their branch & collected our papers back and insisted that we need the approval letter for our records. I was fuming and I wanted to hit them and I said as much. I told Amol, “if you ask me I want to bang your head with this fat file but I am controlling”, poor fellow replied “ma’am if it improves the situation please do so.” I could say nothing and agreed with my hubby who had said, “They are mere employees and have nothing in their hands, do not abuse them”.

I came out dejected; we lived hundred lives in these 20 days. The thought of some 80k as fine was too scary. People around us were telling us that you can fight with the builder but we were scared and did I tell you we were shifting to a new rented place during the same time? Yes we were.

With just a week to go and a public holiday looming over us and daily incessant calls from the builder the deadline looked deadlier. Would HDFC deliver in time? Read the next part to know more.

On a lighter note isn'tthis picture apt? (Recieved it in a forward)

If you notice the lady at the counter is holding an SBI Passbook

Love, Me and Bullshit!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Wed, 02 May 2012 02:56:00 PDT

Title: Love, Me and Bullshit!

Author: Vivek Kumar Agarwal

Price: INR. 100/-

Publisher: Srishti Publisher

The protagonist works with a software firm and wishes to break in CAT and get into IIMA.

He struggles, gets in, falls in love with a girl, cannot confess, finds a job, still harbours feelings for her and cannot get over her. Something big happens in his life and he discovers the real purpose of his life and ta-da life looks better.

That is the story of the book and it didn’t work for me because

The pace of the book is very slow.
There is too much philosophy and gyaan in which has never worked for me.

And the main fact is at the end of the day it is one more “IIM” book in the market. Before you question me about why I picked another IIM book, this was a review copy given by the author and I was hesitant in accepting the request because of the publisher. I have always felt that Srishti publisher is doing nothing but filling the market with sub-standard books. But when Vivek confirmed that the book has been edited by a third party I decided to review the book but for now no more IIT IIM and discovering yourself books. I am finally done with them.

Sadly the book had no Love, loads of Me (as in self talk) and loads n loads of bullshit!

I wish good luck to the author and hope that he writes something different next time.

Rating 1/5

**********************

As I have been saying that lately have been reading a lot and if I take the number of books that I had targeted to read then I am already at 44% achivement, yay! to that :) but there was one book which I had read last year, loved it a lot but couldn't review it. The reason behind that was that I loved the book so much that I felt inadequate to write about and trust me this isn't the first time that it has happened like that. Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni's "Arranged Marriage" & the "Ladies No 1 Detective Agency Series" by Alexander McCall Smith are few such books about which I am unable to write as I loved them.

But the book I am talking about here is "The House of Silk" by Anthony Horowitz. I have not read many Sherlock Holmes mysteries & when this book was sent to me by the publisher I couldn't help picking it up and once I began reading there was no stopping. What nicely written thriller. There are so many twists & turns in the 320 pages that you are always on the edge. And the best part is that You can even guess the suspense and when revealed it shocks you. Awesome read it is and I would rate it 5/5.

When we bought a Car & Almost Lost It!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Fri, 27 Apr 2012 03:07:00 PDT

We’ve bought a car. Yay!! It is an Alto K10 and is of maroon colour. It was delivered on Akshya Tritya! Double yay to that :D

I & hubby drove back with it to home where My In-Laws and the brat were waiting. We had been preparing him for the event and as soon as he saw the car he said ‘bali-bali car’ (meaning big car) and man wasn’t it good for our egos? While we were thinking which car to pick I was feeling that we are taking a small car whereas my husband felt that a- it was fuel efficient car b- the maintenance cost would be low and c- it was what we could afford over & above the house loan (I know I need to update the Home Search Chronicles, hopefully next week). So, with the son saying, what he said I was like, feeling good and no I do not want to think about the car with which he is comparing our car ;)

So, after picking everyone we went to a temple and did a puja of the car. The punditji was quite nice and he did the pooja nicely. Post the pooja when we gave him the dakshina he says “I will not take anything less than 501, you’ve bought a big car and this is what you give me?” (Of course with a smile on his face)

When we upped the amount (not as per his wish but ours) and decided to touch his feet he said “may you prosper and buy a big car”. Ha! Paradoxical but I decided to let it go.

After that we decided to go for a ride never forgetting to slow down in front of all the temples on the way and paying our respect to Gods. Hubby got adventurous and we moved further ahead and realised that we were in the vicinity of “Iskon Temple” and thus decided to go there. The car was parked a little away from the temple on the main road. While we were getting out my hubby asked everyone to lock their doors & to close the windows properly. I would not be exaggerating by saying that he plastered us with 2 mins of gyaan on that.

Anyways, I had Arnav with me and along with my MIL we entered the temple premise when my MIL commented, “see there is enough parking space in here also, why did we park on the main road? Our car has a garland etc. and is easily visible that it is new, will it be safe?” I assured here that all will be well as many people had parked their vehicles there. So we moved ahead, deposited our footwear, washed our hands and went inside the temple only to see that the curtains were down on the idol as they were preparing for the Aarti and it was then that my heart started beating at double rate and I called my hubby.

Him: Let’s wait for the aarti.

Me: No let us go, it is only 8:10 and it begins only on 8:30

Him: It is just 20 mins.

Me: When we were entering mummyji had said about car getting stolen as it is parked on the main road and I am not getting good vibes, let us leave.

Him: Arrey! Nothing will happen why are you so worried?

Me: But no I am not feeling good about it. Plus the papers are also inside.

Him: What papers?

Me: The original papers of the car

Him: What? Why didn’t you get them along? How could you forget?

Me: It didn’t even come to my mind plus even you didn’t remember.

Needless to say I got a glare for that but my revelation had the desired effect and hubby went to his parents to tell them that we are leaving. As soon as we stepped out of the temple my hubby realised that he didn’t have the keys! My heart which was beating a little high rate started pounding. We half ran and half walked towards where we had parked the car. I made an attempt to look out from quite far that whether the car was still there not and when I couldn’t see it I was shit scared. My only solace was that since we had parked it behind an MUV it might not be visible.

Last few steps towards the space were made in a haste and I cannot tell you the relief that I felt when I saw the car sitting innocently where had left it and yes the keys were locked inside. Before you ask me where the duplicate key was, well both of them were bunched together. So much for the gyaan that husband had given to us, all the doors and windows were locked properly. I would have laughed at the paradox but situation was serious.

We went inside the campus of the temple to look for a scale (it is popularly known that maruti vehicles can be opened with a scale) but were not lucky. My hubby then took a lift from someone and went to look out for a mechanic. Me, MIL, FIL & sonny boy waited near the car. Thankfully, the brat had eaten a piece of sweet after leaving the temple and thus was not hungry otherwise it was his meal time. There was a niggling worry of dinner getting late and then my stomach grumbled. I had not eaten anything post lunch which was also only half eaten as had received a call from my boss and had to rush out of lunch. What? Do you think these were not pressing matters? Ha! I always knew that the car would open and a woman has many things to handle you see ;)

Some 15 mins later hubby walked in with a mechanic and a couple. As hubby later told me he had met the couple when he was walking down with the mechanic. These guys were out for a walk and thankfully vigilant. When they came to know about our predicament the guy said he knows how to open the lock as he himself has left the keys in quite a few times. So, with the help of a big knife (which was scary) a wire with a loop at its end was slipped in and after a few failed attempts they managed to open the lock. Needless to say we heaved a sigh of relief. As my hubby says we were gifting the car to a thief along with the original papers & both the keys.

Surprisingly when I narrated this incident at office with few of my colleagues I came to know that each of them had a similar story to share i.e. mishaps on the day you buys a car. Anyways, I feel that with this experience we have learned it quite early and my hubby would not forget the keys again. But then you can never say never because I have a colleague who tends to forget his keys inside the car twice every month and is now an expert in opening the door with a scale.

But as is said all is well that ends well, post the recovery we ate out and crashed out after a very eventful day.

P.S. Take a look of this pic, the punditji has a striking resemblance with Narendra Modi no?

Two Fates!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 02:58:00 PDT

Title:         Two Fates – The Story of my Divorce
Author:     Judy Balan
Price:        INR. 150/-
Publisher: Westland

Rishab & Deepika had a love marriage; they have what others call a “perfect marriage.” People quote them as role models for being a couple which is just made for each other. What no one realises is that the couple in question has actually fallen out of love and have decided to go in for a divorce on mutual consent.

They decide to break the news to their family but things are never as easy they look are they? Theirs was Punju meets tamilian marriage which happened in the backdrop of family opposition. Cut to present the same families have now turned inseparable. They are thick as thieves and are onto bigger conspiracies. They have the project “make Deepika pregnant” in their hands. The only thing that they can do here is pushing the couple together and that is what they do.

Unfortunately for Rishab & Deepika this is trouble with capital ‘T’. Imagine a couple into thick of divorce being sent for a 2nd honeymoon.

Why don’t they just break the news to their parents?

What happens when they go for their 2nd honeymoon?

Will they survive the mush surrounding them & get divorced?

Read the book to know more.

My Verdict

Had heard a lot about the book from fellow bloggers and finally picked it when my favourite store was offering some 30% discount & never regretted the decision.

Breezy from the word go this book pulls you in. I fell in love with the contemporary characters and had quite a many laugh out loud moments. What I also loved about the book was the tongue in cheek humour with which she has turned around 2 States by Chetan Bhagat.

The writing is such that you empathise with the protagonist and while reading there was a time when I thought why are they separating and not only that I was even disappointed with the prospect. If this isn’t that a sign of a good writing then nothing else is. So go grab a copy of this romantic cum humorous cum rollercoaster cum cute ride. Worth every penny and surely to be finished in one sitting.

Rating 3/5

A Quick Post on the Alibaugh Trip

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Fri, 20 Apr 2012 00:50:00 PDT

No updates!

No Book reviews!

No replying to comments!

Commenting erratically in fellow blogger’s post!

I am bad!

But what if I tell you that I am loaded with too much work at office?

Doesn’t work?

What if I tell you I was sick!

Works?

But I am lying! ;-)

What if I tell you my maid has fallen sick and has not been there for a fortnight (almost)?

Ah! I knew that will work :D

But honestly I have been guilty of neglecting this place but what to do, there has been so much to do that I hardly get time to read blogs and writing one is out of question. I have even not been able to keep my promise of reviewing 2 books a week, hope to restart it soon and to get back on track. The only good thing that has happened in recent past is the trip we made to Alibaugh. What fun it was.

You cannot see but I am holding three balls :D

Yaay!

We left from our place at 8ish and were there by 11. There was a stopover in between for breakfast but otherwise it was smooth sailing. It being Arnav’s first trip of this kind we were anticipating him to be quite excited and he didn’t disappoint us. He had total fun in the bus. You don’t believe me? See this.

We were a group of 16-17 people and there was one more family besides us. They had 2 children and who were older to Arnav. The kids were introduced and we asked the brat to say hello to both the girls. He very sweetly started calling them didi! It was much later that we realised that one of the kid (2+) was actually a boy but since his hair cutting ceremony was pending he had long hair. Till the end of the trip we were busy correcting Arnav, ‘beta didi nahin bhaiya’ and then he would repeat “bhiya”. Phew!

Once we reached the place where were putting up Men left no time in hitting to the swimming pool. Though we tried putting in Arnav there but he for some reason didn’t like the pool. I then took him to our room for a bath and man what a blast he had. He bathed for some 20 mins and was hyper excited. Post lunch we rested for an hour and left for Birla temple. We quite liked the place and post that we headed towards Kashid beach.

The beach was beautiful more so because a) It wasn’t crowded & b) it was clean. We had loads of fun there. Hubby went for a banana ride which turned out to be one hell of an experience. We even hired a sand bike and did horse riding. In fact the later turned out to be an embarrassing experience because I had so much trouble climbing up the horse. The trouble was because of two reasons, one I am short and 2nd I am over weight. Arrgh! I do not even want to remember it. As hubby said “chadha to diya, utrogi kaise?” (We managed to haul you up what will we do when you have to climb down). I even took Arnav with me (he was crying when I was climbing and then he started crying when he was on the horse) and they say women have difficulty deciding.

Kaam!

Dumppper truck!!!

Mumma's feeble attempt!

But the highlight of the beach was the fun that Arnav had. He had total blast in the water. As soon as he would see a wave coming he would yell with excitement and then wait for the next wave to come. Post that he had fun with sand he played played & played with it so much that I cannot even put it here in words so see the pictures that follow.

We reached the bungalow where we were putting up at 9, freshened up & had dinner. It was during dinner that Arnav pulled up a trick. He has this habit of walking with a squat and saying batak! Batak1 (duck) and he did just that in front of the whole group and what an endearing sight it was. Everyone was amused and till the end of the trip people kept requesting him to repeat the act but the brat he is he kept people waiting.

Next day we decided to visit Kulaba Fort in Alibaugh. The interesting thing about this place is that it is some 1.5 kms inside the sea. The way to access is to either walk down the (at a point water would touch your torso) or hire a horse cart. We did the later and had an experience of a lifetime. Needless to say Arnav also had fun and the highlight of the ride was him repeating the guy who was riding the cart. The brat picked up the tone & words of the driver and would say “haait, haait” (the way the guy was saying to make the horses run) and if the guy would stop doing it my brat would yell, uncle uncle haait haait. Even today when tell him ,’Arnav what was the uncle in Alibaugh saying to the horse?’ pat comes his reply ‘haait, haait’! The fort in itself was kind of O.K.

Have few more things to say but I will let the photos do the talking because I am bored of writing :P

Happy Weekend guys

About to Kick!

Whether I play or not is Immaterial I should Own!

Chal diye!

Haait! Haait!

Mumma in the Step Well!

So much water!!!

With Mumma!

Aiyo! Is it gonna kiss my Daddy?

Today I smile because I can see A Light at the end of the Tunnel!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 03:57:00 PDT

Life has been hectic. Period!

I have not replied to so many comments here that I feel guilty putting up an update.

But I don’t like my blog being silent, so here I am with a quick update.

What have I been busy with?

We attended 2 birthday parties (of kids) in 2 weeks and though to some of you it might not sound as a big number but for someone who had not attended even one birthday in God knows how many years it is big. It reminds me that I am a Mother now (not that I do not have enough proofs for it) and am getting trained for future when there would be more parties to attend to. With that said, Arnav loved the parties that we have attended. The 1st one was a grand affair and was theme based and Arnav got his first tattoo there needless to say he was super excited. After that party I had been preparing him for the 2nd party and this conversation happened between us n number of times

Me: Arnav what will you say when we go to the party?

A: Appy buday!

Me: Good! (the first time he said those words, I was so overwhelmed & proud that I can not put in words)

A: Tattoo!!! Uncle!!!

He meant that he will get a tattoo made by the uncle.

By Friday the conversation took this route

Me: Arnav what will say when we go to the party?

A: Tattoo!!! Uncle!!!

Me: lol!!! That’s true but what will you say there?

A: Tattoo!!! Uncle!!! Tattoo!!! Tattoo!!! Anaao!! (Uncle will make Tattoo on Arnav’s hand)

Me: Yes uncle will make a tattoo but what will you say at the party?

A: Appy buday!

Talk about setting priorities. But despite the hula boo when we went for the party yesterday and offered Arnav’s hand for tattoo he was fidgety and lasted only till a face was created. I went ahead & got tattooed to encourage him and when I asked now will you get one? He says Nahin!

Kids I tell you! It is hard to believe that he was muttering tattoo in his sleep also! No I am not kidding, he was.

Besides attending kiddo b’day parties it is work that has been keeping me busy. Loads to do, generating new MIS’s launching it on some site and then fielding questions & queries on it, that’s a normal day in my life. But then there are incidents which give us a reason to smile, no change it to laugh!

Last week I had left my Sodexho coupons on my desk (yes I can be careless that ways) and security people took it away leaving a post it to contact them. Upon contacting I was asked to go and collect it from their office which is some 1.5 kms away from where I sit. After dilly dallying for two days I went there on Friday to collect it and guess what? They cannot find it!!!

Imagine, security people confiscate something from my desk to keep it safely and they lose it. Paradoxical! Not that I am letting the matter end like this but I cannot help laughing at the situation.

On the books front I finished reading “House Rules” by Jodi Picoult and though the book was good but it was a painful read. 30% down the book I had guessed the mystery behind the murder (around which the book was woven) but had to read the whole book to wrap it up. I could have left the book in between but the thought “what if my guess is wrong” made me finish the book. The reason I could guess the end was that after having read so many books from an author you know the pattern of their writings.

In other news after deliberating for almost a month I finally ordered Sophie Kinsella’s latest!!! Yay!!! And I start reading it today. Talk about silver lining!!! Man so many times I was tempted to leave House Rules to start this one but I controlled. Wish had the same kind of control on dieting. I like to lose weight like NOW but not doing anything for it. Sigh!!

Aah! There is one more silver lining at the end of tunnel. This weekend we are going to Alibaug for two days. Yay!!! I badly need the break!

So how was your weekend?

Did I tell you that I had spent the better part of yesterday scrubbing the walls of kitchen & bathrooms? No? Here I have told you but then I see myself enjoying at the beach next Saturday and forget all my woes!!!

Not to self: stop being self-centred.

I repeat my question how was your weekend?

And here I leave you with 2 snaps of the little devil.

Happy Monday :D

So Finally you managed to click a pic huh?

Maaish with poww!!! (Maalish with Powder)

Taming of A Thief & Some other stories from Life....

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 03:58:00 PDT

I think this happened a couple of months back. At office we have a habit of keeping stuff to eat with us. The fact that there are kiosks in our canteen which sells stuff like biscuits, cakes, chocolates, Khakhra, wafers, namkeens & stuff doesn’t help our cause of losing weight as we keep stocking up stuff and keep munching every now & then.

So on that fateful day I had picked up some namkeen (aloo jeera) which I usually avoid to buy as it is deep fried but that day I decided to pamper myself and bought it. Everything was duly kept in my drawer and I left for the day. Next morning when I came in with my cuppa coffee I opened the drawer very earnestly only to find the packet I was lusting for missing. I searched every nook & corner. I had brought other stuff with it as well of which half a packet of biscuit remained and rest all had disappeared. I was furious, sad & depressed, come on I had not even opened the packet and I just simply love aloo jeera, I love it so much that I can finish one full packet in one sitting (& later suffer acidity willingly). While I was undergoing the whole gamut of emotions I had also given away a wail of cry because of which my colleague who sits next to me got up. I shared my woes with her only to realise that even her ~~larder~~ drawer had been raided.

We realised that we had by mistake left our drawers opened which had resulted in this robbery. Sadly we also knew who was behind it; the housekeeping personnel who come in night shift were notorious for this. Slowly when we exchanged notes we realised that we were not the only sufferers. These idiots had not even spared the cabin guys. We contemplated complaining to the security guys but decided against it because we knew that we would ultimately be blamed for not locking in the drawers. We thus decided to reload our larders and be extra safe in locking.

So for next few weeks things went as planned, we were cautious and the days when we forgot to lock we (as in I & my neighbour) would call each other to lock the drawers. But cannily the days we missed locking in the stuff would get stolen. We were amazed with the efficiency of the buggers, they always checked all the drawers. I mean imagine on a floor where 50-60 people sit not even a single unlocked drawer would survive these idiots. In fact one day I had left a packet of biscuits on my desk but was pretty sure that it won’t go because it was kept in a corner, buried under a diary and heaps of paper.

No prizes for guessing that even that was gone. It was then that I decided that I had had enough. I knew I had to act but wasn’t sure what to do. It was at home when I decided upon the POA. What happened was that while I was taking out some stuff from my kitchen I saw a box of old cookies. These were expensive cookies but were old (as in 2-3 months old) & I had been thinking of throwing them but didn’t have the heart to do so. Next day I brought them to the office, kept them in a nice dabba and very purposefully hid them under the papers on my desk.

As was expected they weren’t there the next morning.

That was the day & it’s today, there are days when I forget to lock my drawer but none of my stuff is stolen.

We do try to imagine what would have happened to the housekeeping guy but the only thing that I can manage after my imagination is that of ending up in a fit of giggles :D

Have you ever faced any such situation? How did you handle it?

Another day at work

Me on phone: Sir, I wanted to ask about that XYZ thing, it was supposed to be finished by yesterday na?

Him: *laughs out loud* I must say one thing you are very prompt in following up.

Me: *makes small noises of laughter* that’s my job sir, but what is the update?

Him: You ask difficult questions.

Me: No problem sir I will ask an easy one, how are you?

Him: ha ha ha ha!!!!

And the ice gets broken and I get all my answers.

An incident @ Home

I was feeding my son yesterday and was reading out from a book to him. He as usual was dodging every bite that I was offering. We play this tug of war kind of thing, I offer, he rejects, I offer again, he rejects again, I insist, he insists against it, I show him something in the book, his attention gets diverted & I manage to put the bite in his mouth. Phew!!!

So while were at it yesterday he looks at me puts a finger on his lips and says chup! He has picked this habit from my maid and very cutely says chup to his cars which blares horn & sirens. I digress. So he said chup to me & I immediately questioned him with a glare, “why should I be chup?” The smarty pant realised his mistake and immediately says “didi”.

Which basically meant “I was not saying it to you but to didi” (the full time maid). Ha! she was not there in the room also but I decided to let the matter rest because I think he realised that he had used the word at a wrong place.

The only solace that I give myself is at least he is a smart & fast thinker.

The Lake of Dreams

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Wed, 28 Mar 2012 03:02:00 PDT

Title: The Lake of Dreams

Author: Kim Edwards

Price: INR. 399/-

Publisher: Penguin India

Unable to get over her father’s death Lucy moves out of her home, gets educated and becomes a wanderer. She keeps jumping jobs, continents & relationships till she meets Yoshi. Together they move to Japan. Living in an earthquake prone city Lucy leads a tranquil life. When she hears of her mother’s accident she decides to visit her.

The city that she reaches to is on the brink of major changes, things are not like before. Her brother has joined the family business which was being run by the much her hated uncle Art. Her mother is on the brink of an exciting relationship which is minor shock for Lucy. And to top it all Keegan, her best friend and her ex was in town. As if she didn’t have enough on her plate she discovers some letters which she shares with her mother. Who in turn shares a fabric which she had a couple of years back.

One link leads to the other and Lucy starts unravelling a past which is so enchanting that Lucy forgets everything and gets on to finding more & more about Rose, who she finds out is the sister of her Great Grandfather.

To add to her complex life there is that pressing issue of her mother wanting to sell their beautiful lakeside house to Art, Lucy somehow feels that there is something amiss in the whole deal.

To further complicate the matters she gets on to the wrong foot of her brother when she by mistake shares his secret with their mother.

And what about the pull that she feels towards Keegan and the doubts that are creeping up on her about her relationship with Yoshi.

Where will this trip lead to?

Will it be life changing for Lucy & her family?

Will she manage to find the whole truth about Rose & her daughter Iris?

Where will the past that she is so hell bent to discover lead to?

Will it be akin to opening a can of worms?

Or will Lucy learn it the hard way “that some incidents are better buried than discovered.”

Read the book to get your answers.

My verdict

Let me be honest, I picked this book because of the author’s last highly acclaimed book, “Memory Keepers Daughter”. I had picked it up last year despite the high price because the reviews were very good but I never read it because somehow I had a feeling that it will be a depressing book (I felt so because of the blurb) and how wrong I was.

Though a little slow in the beginning the book blows you away as it progresses further. When Lucy starts discovering her long forgotten/ ignored relatives you start waiting with a baited breath, what will happen next. The letters written by Rose to her daughter Iris are worth a read and take you to a not so liberal era where women were fighting for their rights and a night in jail was such a big issue that they were thrown out of their homes. So well written the letters make you feel for Rose who suffered a lot but never allowed her spirit to die.

The best part about the book is that the author has so many aces up her sleeve that you just can’t get enough of it. Towards the end when the secrets explode you will feel, “I didn’t even think of it”.

This is one of those books which you want to finish in a hurry because you wish to know what will happen next and eventually when you are done reading with it you regret finishing it too soon. An awesome read, I finished some 200 pages in one sitting and had a headache & paining eyes for the whole day but didn’t regret it.

A Must read!

My Rating 4/5

The Norway Custody Case - My views!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 05:47:00 PDT

Have you been following the case of the custody row of an Indian couple in Norway? To put it briefly last May the kids of Anurup & Sagaraika Bhttacharya were taken in custody by Norwegian court because it was felt that the children were not being cared for properly. As quoted in the article from NDTV
You can read the full article here Norway custody row: Mother was depressed, needed help with children, says report.

In November last year, a Norwegian court ordered that three-year-old Abhigyan and one-year-old Aishwarya would live in a foster home till they turned 18. The two children were taken away from their parents in May last year by the Norwegian child welfare services, who alleged that the Bhattacharya’s had "an emotional disconnect" with their children and that this could be harmful for the children's safety and development.

NDTV has accessed that court order, a confidential report of November last year, that supported a recommendation that the children of Anurup and Sagarika Bhattacharyya should be put in a foster home as the parents were unfit to bring them up. Three-year-old Abhigyan and one-year-old Aishwarya have been in a foster home for the last 10 months. They were taken away by the child welfare service in Stavenger, Norway, and the court found reason not to re-unite them with their parents because kindergarten staff and child welfare professionals who were in their home to assist them, said Sagarika was clinically depressed and needed help with the children. Sagarika says she has not been tested medically before being termed clinically depressed.

The court also found her attitude towards the children "erratic". It noted that son Abhigyan was diagnosed with attachment disorder; the boy, the court said, reacted if the mother raised her hand, as though she intended to hit him and concluded that he had either been hit before or had seen physical violence between the parents. It also criticised Sagarika for describing Abhigyan as arrogant and for leaving infant Aishwarya "in dangerous situations when changing diapers."

When I had started following the news I was depressed & enraged with the way things were happening with the couple. I kept a tab on the news and started reading as many related articles as possible & the picture that came to my mind was that the parents were right here and it was the cultural difference that was causing all the distress. I also came across an article where it said that these kinds of things keep happening in Norway and Foster Parenting is almost a parallel business because the allowances for foster parents are very attractive. (I am unable to find a link to the said article but will search and update in case am able to locate it.)

I kept following the news of how the Bhattacharya’s were pressing the government for support and how leaders from opposition (read Brinda Karat & Sushma Swaraj) sat for a dharna in support of the couple.

When I read the news that the custody might finally be given over to their uncle I heaved a sigh of relief because it is beyond my imagination that kids are not under the care of their parents despite the fact that they are alive and for the simple reason that government authorities didn’t feel that they not being brought up properly.

I also saw few videos (appended in here) where the parents were meeting their kids after 3 months (they meet them once in 3 months) but what struck me was the stony look in the mother eyes I felt as if she is posing for the camera but then I scolded myself for being prejudiced.

Of & on I kept reading articles about how our government was speeding the process and putting pressure on the Norwegian government. Everything seemed to be going on track until this news was reported

Norway custody case: Husband accuses wife of 'psychological problems'.

Post this news the wife has also accused husband of the abuse and then they say they have patched up and been misquoted by media.

The Norway child custody case involving an NRI couple which has already sparked off a diplomatic row has taken a curious turn following the husband and his parents alleging that the wife had "psychological problems".

Anurup Bhattacharya, a geophysicist and the father of two children Abhigyan aged three and one-year-old Aishwarya, who were taken into care by Norwegian social services, has accused his wife Sagarika of having "psychological problem" and is mulling separation from her.

To say I was shocked would be wrong because somehow I had been expecting this kind of news. Let me tell you why. While reading the articles I came across 2 statements made by the mother which looked kind of out of place to me.

She’s Not Coming Back

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Thu, 22 Mar 2012 03:37:00 PDT

Title: She’s Not Coming Back

Author: Hans Koppel

Price: INR. 350/- (Available for Rs. 263/- @ Flipkart)

Publisher: Hachette India

Ylva is held captive. Kidnapped, raped repeatedly and at the mercy of her captors. The irony is, she is in the basement of the house opposite to her own house. To add to the torture her captors have installed CCTV across the road and she can see what her husband & daughter are doing.

When she 1st goes missing her husband feels that this might be one of those one off trips and he doesn’t do much to find her because he was too scared of what he might find, how could he forget her past liaisons. But when she doesn’t turn up on the 2nd or 3rd day he decides to call in police only to become their prime suspect.

In another city a filthy reach guy & his journalist friend sit reminiscing about their past. They keep thinking about a group of four friends who had specialised in torturing everyone in school. He has this desire to know what happened with them. A little dig here & a little dig there they realise that of the group only one is alive. The discovery jolts them into action.

Is the discovery related to the kidnapping of Ylva?

Will she ever escape her captivators?

Will her daughter & husband stop looking for her?

Read the book to know more.

My Verdict

I think you will agree with me that you start expecting great things from a book when it comes with recommendations like “The most terrifying crime novel I have read”, “The Swedish Thriller phenomenon” etc. It was a long time that I had read any thriller and thanks to the long list of recommendations (at the back cover of the book) I decided to pick this book which I had received from Hachette India.

A revenge crime, this book chronicles every stage of how a captivator tortures his/ her bait. The book though well written & captures the tortures inflicted on the Ylva in an impassionate manner which does add a dash of cruelty to the whole thing. Because when you there are no detailed explanations of the crime you start imagining the situation and isn’t that gory.

Unfortunately for me that was the only thing that worked in the book. The characters are half baked, the policeman are clichéd, the drive with which Ylva’s classmate start following the case is not justified, I mean you cannot just wake up one morning and start tracking the people whom you had never liked in first place. The build-up to Ylva’s character is such that you will not sympathise with her, not that anything justifies crime but still.

The book however highlights the crimes that keep happening against women. Have we not heard enough horror stories of how women were kept captive in a basement for years? And what scares you the most is how ladies help men in inflicting sexual crimes against other woman. Isn’t it scary?

All in all a decent book which could have been better. I also felt that had it not come with such heavy recommendations I might have liked it a notch better. But if thrillers are your cup of tea then this book is for you because despite the title you keep turning pages to know will she ever come out.

My Rating 2.5 / 5

Meaningless Quirks That We Carry Around...

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Mon, 19 Mar 2012 03:48:00 PDT

....only because they are Important for us ;)

Do you have any quirks? Like the desire to straighten that turned corner of the bed sheet or the inability of seeing anything lying out of place? Or that queer feeling that you might have left the door unlocked? Everyone has their share of quirks or must do things and unless those are in place you don’t feel comfortable.

I have one such quirk, I need to shave off the hair from my legs and arms once every week and if I don’t do that I feel uncomfortable & unclean. In fact the idea of this post came to my mind yesterday. Last week there was a water problem in my area which resulted in a scheduled water supply i.e. between 6-7:30 AM an ungodly time for a bath. This resulted in me taking hurried baths with rationed water and all this snowballed in me being unable to shave off the hair from my legs. I faced the consequences day before yesterday when I was wearing a stretchable chooridar and I felt as if the hair on my legs where getting stretched and paining me. Yes I know a lot of it was my imagination & a little psychology at play but it was damn irritating. The day water supply was restored I went to the task and felt as if my legs were lighter.

There is a history behind the shaving quirk. I remember I was in the 3rd year of my college and we decided to do Nagapuri group dance for the college fest. We had worked hard and it was when we did a dress rehearsal that a friendly senior told us, “girls, your dress ends 5 inches before your ankle and if you don’t clean the hair on your leg the rowdy seniors in the audience will inflict torture in the name of hooting & rude comments.” Needless to say we were scared and went into a huddle. While most of the voices said waxing, I was scared.

When I was 12 I had accompanied a cousin of mine to the beauty parlour where she was to get ready for her wedding day. When I saw her screaming while getting waxed I had decided that I am not ever gonna inflict that kind of torture on myself.

So amidst the majority of voices that said waxing when I heard a voice which saying “shaving” I was joyous. It was my close friend Himali which had given that idea, I took her aside to get more details. Yes I was kind of naive back then and she easily educated me and I decided to follow her. We went to the market and bought a razor. But as it happens in a girl hostel, you cannot keep a secret thus hundreds of advices were thrown on me and the most common ones were

What if you cut yourself? So much for being good supportive friends.
Don’t use razor, the hair that grows later is hard. The most common myth and just for records it isn’t like this. While it is a different matter that I don’t let the hair grow enough to know whether it is hard or not but what difference does it really make? Body hair isn’t supposed to be glowing & healthy.
Use of razor makes the skin go dark. As if it makes a difference to an already dark skin. But seriously, then why aren’t the chins of all men dark skinned?

I didn’t listen to anybody and went ahead as we had planned. And I can easily say I have never looked back. The whole process is addictive, time saving & cheap (ya I am cheap that way :P).

I have friends who do not shave off the body hair because of lack of time, they say who has the time to go to a parlour for waxing and I tell them every single time to follow the shaving path. It takes barely 2-3 minutes of your bath time and leaves you clean & smooth ;). The market is flooded with razors for us ladies but trust me the Gillette razor specially designed for us and the usual 7 O’ Clock one designed for Men are no different. The only thing that you need to do is to lather yourself well and be careful while doing the deed and voila! You are through.

And just for records I have never gone the waxing path, nah! Not even during my marriage. I am scared of the pain even now, see am I not strange? Not scared of the operation or delivery but scared of things like these, may be because I have an alternative. Will you believe me when I say that I have never had my eyebrows set? And no they don’t look like a jungle, fortunately God has bestowed me with shapely eyebrows and they don’t need to be set up. *small big pleasures of a girl’s life*

One more quirk that I can think of is I don’t like messy hair. Now that I am growing my hair I clip it up and hate when even a strand of hair comes out. Even when I had short hair I used to comb them at regular intervals during the day. Though my friends used to laugh at me because I could actually put them in place by running my fingers through them. But for me it matters. In fact after waking up and going through the morning jobs the first things that I do is combing my hair with half closed eyes.

I also cannot stand wearing synthetic clothes. One day I had worn a chiffon lucknawi kurti and was irritable the whole day. I had headache & was majorly flustered. As soon as I reached home & changed I was as fresh as daisy. In fact this quirk of mine is from childhood. My mom tells me that when I was very-very young we had gone for a movie and by mistake she had dressed me in a synthetic frock. I had cried in the whole movie and my parents had to take turns to take me out of the theatre.

Do you have any such strange quirks? Do you get irritated by small things that shouldn’t matter in larger scheme of things but make a hell lot of difference to your world?

Artist, Undone

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Sat, 17 Mar 2012 02:45:00 PDT

Title: Artist, Undone

Author: V. Sanjay Kumar

Price: INR. 495/-

Publisher: Hachette India

‘I can see where you are going. Up shit creek…with a paddle.’

He was right. That is where I was going.

It was the kind of thing that my analyst had always warned me against: ‘you are at an inflexion point, in a mood to do the irrational and the irreverent.’

He forgot irreversible.

Harsh Sinha, forty, decides to take a year off from his work to spend some quality time with his family. He was based in Mumbai and his family in Chennai. After years having spent weekends with them he is fed up and wants a change. When he reaches his home & shares the news with his wife he expected a warm welcome. What he didn’t expect was being thrown out of his own home & the realisation that he had no family.

His wife Gayathri tells him in clear terms that their relationship is over. What she doesn’t tell him that she is more interested in Newton, the crazy artist who lived next door. Well, how could she, it was yet to happen, the relationship that is.

Newton is a crazy artist who has often been termed a thief because his art always imitated his inspiration. Add to the fact that he was a womanizer and thus the fodder that every journalist dreamt of.

After the rejection Harsh moves back to Mumbai & keeping him company is a 27 Lakh painting that he had bought on a whim because he saw himself in the muse. In a bid to unload the painting he starts exploring the art galleries and gets sucked into the industry which functions strangely and ends up meeting Manoj Tyaagi, who after inadvertently getting entangled in a financial scam is termed as “The Naami Chor”. Together they forge a friendship and make a foray in the art world. And it is here that his life connects with that of Newton.

What happens further is best read.

My Verdict

Quirky, strange, entertaining and immensely readable is how I will describe this book.

There are lengthy discussions on Art which according to me should have been boring but strangely that wasn’t case, I guess that says something about the writing. In fact I would go to the extent of saying that the book is like Newton in some ways. A little crazy & yet entertaining. It is full of sub plots and entertaining characters which connect at some point or the other. There were times when I felt where is this going but then the writing was such that it kept pulling me back.

A different book in terms of treatment but a nice read and at the cost of repeating myself, a little crazy just like the cover ;)

My Rating 3.5/5

Two Pains - The Story of my Delivery

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Tue, 13 Mar 2012 03:51:00 PDT

Let me come straight to the point.

Are you scared of needles?

I am!

I was unwell for the better part of last week; I was feeling giddy, had a body pain & there was always that nagging puckish feeling. Before you jump to conclusions, I had my periods just a week back so no I am not expecting. I showed to a resident doctor at my office and when she said may be I was suffering from indigestion or acidity, I ridiculed her and refused to take any medicine. I was majorly down on Wednesday but when I woke up on the day of Holi I was feeling better and thus ate samosa’s for breakfast. It was by afternoon that the stomach ache surfaced. By evening I had vomited twice and the pain was unbearable. Thus we decided to visit a doctor who declared that I was suffering from Minor food poisoning.

After she had written what she had to write in the prescription she said to me, “I have written the medicines for you but the kind of pain that you I have I don’t think that the medicines will help much so I will give you an injection, ok?” and I was like if it is absolutely necessary. Needless to say according to her IT was necessary.

So as I lied down I told her to go easy and she just smiled.

To be really honest I ridicule myself for my fear because at the end of the day it is just a prick but I don’t know why but I am scared. No need to laugh at me because when I tell you my delivery story you will laugh louder. No, not because I was scared of the operation, in fact I was super cool about it but for someone who took the operation in her stride, to be scared of a needle is ridiculous.

When I was in the 8th month of my pregnancy my gynaec had told me that the baby was in a breach position and that would mean we will have to go for a Cesarean. Till the point this was told to us we were very clear that I will be having a normal delivery (though in the heart of my heart I always knew it will be a Cesarean for me) so we were shocked. We consulted another doctor with a hope that she will tell us something different but the verdict remained same.

My gynaec advised us to choose the day & time of the operation. After much deliberation we decided on a date & time and accordingly my Mom & brother planned their trips.

9th August afternoon was the chosen date & time. I was given a list of instructions which included that I was not supposed to eat anything after 8 am. My mother in law was tense and my mother cool. As far as I was concerned I was more worried about what I will eat before checking-in in the hospital because

a) I was not supposed to eat for 1-2 days after the operations

b) I was told that my diet post the delivery would be Boring.

Thus I decided to have aloo ka paratha and sooji ki kheer early morning before going to the hospital. 8th evening was spent playing carom, chatting with my nieces & doing time pass. I went to sleep at around 11ish and then an hour later I started feeling a pain in my tummy. I thought my stomach was upset so I picked my novel and went to the loo. Since I was also told that I won’t be allowed to read anything post the delivery I was keen to finish my novel (sadly it still lies unread). I came out after spending 10 mins inside and some 10 mins later I again felt the pain and managed to spend more time inside the loo and it was then that my mom who was sleeping with me grew suspicious.

When I came out she asked me what the issue is. I told her I think my stomach is upset and I am having cramps because of it. Being the experienced one she immediately guessed that I was having labour pains.

Everyone, (read my Husband, MIL, FIL, brother & SIL) was woken up. A call was made at the nursing home and we decided to check in immediately. I took a bath, got ready, paid respect to the Gods adorning our Pooja and was ready to leave. We reached the hospital in no time and got admitted immediately.

There was just one nurse there at that time and she checked my vitals and informed the doctor. I guess it was 4 AM then and according to her there was no hurry. Since there wasn’t much to do hubby & bro left back for home and our wait began. Some instruments were tied onto me to keep a tab on my baby. My Mom & MIL were there with me at that time. Slowly the frequency of my pain increased and so did the worry of both the mothers. They were worried majorly for two reasons, one, the nurse didn’t look efficient enough and it seemed she was in no hurry. And two, since mine was a breach case any delay could result in a major complication.

Slowly time ticked away and gradually the pain increased. I started counting the gaps between each cycle & did the breathing as I was told to. It was then that my hubby & bro walked in. Insensitive as they are (by they I mean “Men” in general) one sat near my head and other near my feet and asked me to shift. As I was breathing hard my hubby asked kya hua?? (he is asking this question when i have already gone through a labor pain for past 4 hours!!!!) And immediately my bro asks me “yoga kar rahi ho?” (Who will say he has two kids).

Before looks could kill or rather I could murder them, they were saved by Mom. By this time it was already 9 and the head nurse had arrived who very efficiently took over everything. It was after she had come that we breathed a sigh of relief and by 9:30 doctor had also walked in. Here I must tell you that my Gynaec has one of the most assuring personality and she instills immense confidence in her patients. Though it is a completely different matter that I adore her sarees and I have talked about it here.

After all the preoperative procedures were done I was asked to walk in to the operation theatre and on the way the nurse asked for my specs. Pat came my reply, “but I need them before I reach the theatre” and I walked in the theatre with a grin and no fear whatsoever. When I went in the doctors greeted me & I was introduced to each of them. And then began the drama. No don’t worry nothing worrying happened, it was just that I started talking nineteen to dozens. I was awake till the time Arnav was pulled out and even muttered “I always knew it will be a boy but my hubby wanted a girl.” I remember telling the paediatrician about something that was mentioned in Arnav’s scan reports. After the delivery I lost my consciousness and woke up only after I was stitched. My Mom tells me that later the doctor was telling her that your daughter is a non-stop blabber box. As per her I wasn’t quite even for a moment in the operation theatre and she had to practically sedate me to shut me up.

Even after coming out of the theatre I was talking non-stop and was finally scolded to be silent for better recovery. My recovery was good thanks to my will power and I had started walking on the 3rd day and discharged a day before the planned day. My Mom tells me that my MIL was more worried about the pain & operation that I had undergone.

Till date I feel that the hue & cry about the whole process is overrated. For me it was a cake walk but yes when I read other experiences I thank God for being kind to me & also my doctor who made the whole experience easy.

The beauty of my delivery was that despite that fact that I had a planned delivery; Arnav had a mind of his own and decided to come in early but thankfully stuck to the decided date. And the best part was he made me experience the pains of a normal delivery & the operation as well. As they say, I am getting back what I gave to my parents.

So now tell me what do you feel? Do you feel like laughing that somebody who was so brave or rather indifferent about the operation can be scared of a mere injection?

At least I am laughing at myself :D

P.S. Yes the title is inspired and you know from where :P

The Art of Belonging & Using It Effectively!

noreply@blogger.com (Smita) — Mon, 05 Mar 2012 02:39:00 PST

Have you ever faced this question, “aap kahan ke rahne waale ho?” or as we say in English, “you belong to which place?”

I have faced it many a times and in fact even I have a habit of putting up this question. Not that I have a bias towards a place but it is my curiosity which makes me put up this question plus I have this habit of guessing the home state of the person based on the language or tone he/ she speaks. Thanks to this habit of mine I have made several friends. Let me tell you how.

When you come to Mumbai you will realise that the vegetable/ milk/ newspaper vendors, golgappa wallahs, autowallahs etc are mostly from U.P.

The place where we used to previously stay had people mostly from Allahabad & Banaras areas. I had struck friendship with them with the logic that I am also from U.P and we have stayed in Banaras (my Dad was stationed there for 3 years and the time that I have spent there would total to max to max 1 month but nobody goes into finer details you see ;-)).

The place that we have shifted now is also full of vendors from U.P. with the only difference being that people are mostly from Gorakhpur & nearby areas. As I came to know of this fact I was quiet happy because I was born in Gorakhpur. The result of the knowledge is that I have a very healthy friendship with the nearby vegetable waali mausi and she gives me freshest vegetables at a price which is much less than the market price. In fact couple of weeks back when I was getting mehndi applied on my palms I had a very healthy discussion on the politics of UP because the boy who was applying Mehndi was from U.P. and I was a customer who was ready to listen to him. Even the golgappe Wallah who stands under our building is a friend. What delicious golgappa’ s he makes (RM reason for you to visit us).

The fun begins when I am at the answering end of the question “you belong to which place?” Let me tell you why.

From my birth till date I have stayed in Uttar Pradesh (was born there and we are basically from U.P), Orissa (Dad’s job took him there), Rajasthan (I studied there), Uttaranchal (I did my MBA there), Gujarat (twin connection, my Dad worked there & I began my career there. Have spent 5 years there), Madhya Pradesh (Hubby belongs to the state), Maharashtra (presently staying here) and by the sheer logic that you belong to the state where your parents are staying I can also add Tamil Nadu to the list as my Dad is currently working there.

Now tell me which State do I belong to?

How would you answer the question if you are in my place?

I use my husband’s logic. My answer changes depending on whom I am talking to.

Here I must share how my husband uses my multi-state connection. He uses it as per his convenience and as per the need of the hour.

A case in example is this incident. He came home one day & said, “Remember that Gujarati colleague of mine? He was under the impression that you are a Gujju”.

When I asked him how did that happen, he tells me, “Oh I was having this conversation with him when he told me that he was from Ahmedabad then I had told him that even my wife was from Ahmedabad and rest as they say is history.” he further tells me that post that incident that guy had been extra friendly with him and always enquired about me.

Even when we shifted to this new place he met the supervisor of the building. Information was exchanged and it came to his knowledge that the guy was from Banaras, pat my hubby says, even my wife is from Banaras. This got the Sup very excited and he prodded further, Banaras main kahan se hain madam? Needless to say my hubby has no answer to that in fact leave him, even I don’t know the exact details because it is 3 years that my parents have moved from there.

So his approach is simple, when he meets a Gujarati I am from Gujarat, if he meets someone from UP I am from there, same stands true for Chennai and other places that I have mentioned above. Smart no?

Tell me have you ever reaped benefit as I have?

Have you ever felt that the guy who is usually indifferent to you starts seeing you in a different light when they realise that there is a connection between the two of you?

I have seen changes in behaviour after this kind of disclosure. Though I want to believe that the change comes because of the connection but I know things are not as simple. Their behaviour changes because not everybody bothers to talk them. Not everybody gives them a chance beyond haggling or bargaining. Sometimes I have seen people talking to the vendors in very rudely and if not that they speak to them as if they are the lowest in the ladder of prosperity. The fact that I give them a smile, talk to them properly and give to know about them breaks the ice. Add to the fact that we belong to the same place and it becomes a win-win situation. And no I don’t do the talking because I have an ulterior motive in my mind. It is just that I am this way. I want to break ice & be friendly with people who build a wall around them or people whom nobody usually speaks to and if I manage to break the ice (my success rate is 98%) I feel like I have achieved something great.

So after all the ranting’s let me put up the qustion here, where are you from? And how was your weekend? Bolo Bolo Tel Tell….and ya do you agree with what I blabbered here?