The Money Store

NFL Week 4

2013-09-29T09:43:00.000-07:00

Alright, we finally had a nice day going 5-2 yesterday. Now let's carry that momentum over into today and make some mutha' fuckin' money. To be honest, there's not a lot I like on the board today. The NFL this year has been very hard to read and everyone has been getting absolutely smoked by Vegas so far, so I would say proceed with caution until things start to make a little more sense.

Lock Pick
Lightning Bet "Buzz of the Week"
TITANS -3.5 over Jets - While the Jets are better than anyone is giving them credit for, they aren't within a FG of being as good as the Titans. The Titans take care of the ball and have a stout defense. Buzz the Titans and watch them win by double digits.

Standard Play
Pats +3 over FALCONS - I know people are down on the Pats. I know that the Falcons typically never lose at home since Matty Ice has taken over as QB. But the Pats are still the Pats and whenever they are getting points I think you have to take them. I also think, for fantasy purposes, you can look for breakout games from "Banana Hands" Aaron Dobson and RB Brandon Bolden.

CHARGERS +2 over Cowboys - Everyone is high on the Cowboys, and whenever everyone gets high on the Cowboys, Tony Romo goes out and throws 4 picks (definitely one of which will be a pick-6). The Cowboys are still the same old Cowboys, and they're gonna lose outright to the Chargers today.

NFL Week 4 (College Football Saturday)

2013-09-28T08:51:00.002-07:00

Lock Picks
UCF +7 over South Carolina - I think this UCF team is a sleeper team and SC may be overlooking them. The UCF QB is legit and is gonna make some plays to keep his team in this game and possibly even win it outright.

Florida St. -22.5 over BC - Florida St. is just demolishing teams and BC sucks a fat one. Bet FSU no matter how big the spread is when they're playing crappy teams.

AZ St. -4.5 over USC - USC sucks and AZ St. is a very good team, especially at home. HAMMER this line.

Texas A&M -14.5 over Arkansas - Jonny Football...that is all

Standard Plays
Iowa -2.5 over MINNESOTA - Iowa is sneaky good this year and, even though Minny has looked decent, I don't think they're any match for this Iowa team. As less than a FG favorite, Iowa is a bargain here.

WASHINGTON -9 over AZ - This Washington teams has been smashing teams at home this season. AZ is 3-0 and has beat up on some teams as well, but I don't think they have the fire power to keep up with the Huskies.

Oklahoma -4 over ND - I would have made this a MEGA Lock Pick except for some reason I lose no matter what when I bet on or against ND. OK is so much better than the Domers and should destroy them, but that's what I said last year when I placed a $300 lightning bet on OK and subsequently lost $2k on the game.

NFL Week 4 Thursday Night Football

2013-09-26T17:11:00.002-07:00

Lock Pick
RAMS +4 over 49ers - Everyone loves the 49ers tonight, just like everyone loved the 49ers last year against the Rams (myself included). You know what happened in those games when everyone loved the 49ers over the Rams last year? They lost outright to the Rams when they played them in St. Louis and they fucking TIED the Rams when they played them at home in SF.

The 9ers D isn't what everyone thinks it is. In their last 9 games their defense is ranked 29th out of 32 teams, and that's without taking into consideration that their 2 best defensive players are out with a groin and a drinking problem.

Sam Bradford sucks, I get it. You're not gonna feel good about this bet while you're placing it because on paper it looks like a sure fire loser. But as soon as the Rams go up 7-0 and everyone who bet the 9ers is sitting there with a shocked look on their face you'll feel much better.

NFL Week 2 Recap

2013-09-25T10:16:00.000-07:00

Not off to a great start...may be on hiatus next week with a shitty slate of college games coming up while we work out the kinks. Hope to be back the following week with a full weekend of winners and maybe even a podcast that works. For now, here are the results from week 2.

College
MEGA Lock Picks
The Ron Popeil "Set It, & Forget It" Lock of the Week
PSU -4.5 over UCF - If the PSU offense puts up 30+ points they have to win the game, that's the bottom line. That UCF quarterback made some unbelievable plays and they appear to be a pretty legit team. The Penn State D needs to get its act together before I feel comfortable betting them heavy against any good teams, but against shitty teams look for them to cover big spreads.

"helen's Six-Pin" Lock Pick (if you don't get the reference click here)
NORTHWESTERN -28.5 over Western Michigan - Thanks for making me eat my words NU. I didn't see this game so I have no idea what happened, but watching the Wildcats get blanked in the first quarter on my phone made me want to puke.

Lock Pick
The "Grab Your Umbrellas" Lightning Storm Pick of the Week
Arizona -25 over TEXAS SAN ANTONIO - Push. Can't buy a bucket.

Standard Play
JONNY FOOTBALL +9 over Bama - Back door cover for Jonny! Bet on this guy every week for the foreseeable future.

Bonus Play
The "They're Already Holding Players Only Meetings" Lock Tease
BC +20 over USC and Saints +2 over Bucs - USC finally showed up but Lane Kiffin is still a pussy. It's easy to show up against BC, but I'd bet my life savings against USC against any real opponents.

NFL
Lock Pick
The "I'm Betting Strictly Against Christian Ponder on the Road Outdoors" Lock
BEARS -6.5 over Vikings - This game was ugly. I think the Bears are still gonna be good this year, but be weary taking them against big spreads as it appears they're gonna play to the level of their competition and let crappy teams hang around.

Standard Play
The "All of My Friends Are Convinced It's a Winner So It Must Be A Loser" Lock Pick
BUCS +4 over New Orleans - The Bucs can't win a game but they sure can cover spreads. No idea how this happened except that the Saints got mushed by every gambler in the world betting on them.

The "I'm Gonna Regret Sticking By My Browns Prediction" Lock Pick
Browns +7 over RAVENS - I was wrong about the Browns, they suck. That's what I get for believing in a team from Cleveland.

Bonus Play
BIG MONEY 3-Team Money Line Parlay
Bucs +157 over Saints
Cardinals +110 over Lions
Dolphins +130 over Colts

We were a Bucs shanked field goal away from pulling this one off. It was that kind of weekend. Fuck.

MEGA Lock Picks - 0-3
Lock Picks - 1-2-1
Standards Picks - 2-2
This Week 2-4-1
NFL - 1-2
College - 1-2-1
OVERALL - 2-4-1

NFL Week 2

2013-09-15T09:33:00.003-07:00

The Money Store is off to a BLAZING start with a record of 2-7. Holy shit, you couldn't try and pick more losers than I'm picking right now. But you know what that means? I'm due to go on a HEATER. The heater starts today, so get in on it while you can.

Lock Pick
The "I'm Betting Strictly Against Christian Ponder on the Road Outdoors" Lock
BEARS -6.5 over Vikings - The Bears are gonna be a contender this year. They're playing a division rival, but all they have to do is stop AP because Christian Ponder may as well be throwing left handed. I realize that stopping AP is a big task, but the Bears D is legit and will be up to the task (and by that I mean he'll still have 120 yards and 2 TDs). The Bears still will by 2 touches easy, get it before it moves to -7.

Standard Play
The "All of My Friends Are Convinced It's a Winner So It Must Be A Loser" Lock Pick
BUCS +4 over New Orleans - I think the Bucs suck. Yeah, I told you to bet against the Bucs in a tease just yesterday. But when all of my friends are so certain that the Saints are a winner, it has to mean that they're a loser. Don't get caught sitting around with all of your friends watching the Bucs win this one outright and wondering what happened. Sniff out the trap now and bet the Bucs instead.

The "I'm Gonna Regret Sticking By My Browns Prediction" Lock Pick
Browns +7 over RAVENS - The Browns D is serious. The Browns offense sucks. The Ravens D sucks. The Ravens offense is suspect. I don't know, I've talked myself into the Browns for some reason so I'm just going with it. I'm losing all of my bets so you should probably just take the Ravens.

Bonus Play
BIG MONEY 3-Team Money Line Parlay
Bucs +157 over Saints - Bucs will win because everyone thinks they're gonna lose.
Cardinals +110 over Lions - Cards are sneaky good and Detroit is sneaky shitty.
Dolphins +130 over Colts - I think I was wrong about the Dolphins and they're gonna be pretty decent this year. I think I was right about the Colts and they aren't as good as advertised this year.

Throw $50 and make a quick $500. Low risk, high reward.

NFL Week 2 (College Football Saturday)

2013-09-14T08:33:00.002-07:00

With two weeks of college football under our belts I now feel like I'm starting to get a read on the teams. Lots of great games this weekend so here are a few winners.

MEGA Lock Picks
The Ron Popeil "Set It, & Forget It" Lock of the Week
PSU -4.5 over UCF - Set it, & Forget it!

"helen's Six-Pin" Lock Pick (if you don't get the reference click here)
NORTHWESTERN -28.5 over Western Michigan - This line has dropped from -31.5 and may continue to drop so be sure to keep an eye on it before placing your bet. NU has only not covered 2 spreads since the beginning of the 2012 season so continue to bet on them until they do otherwise.

Lock Pick
The "Grab Your Umbrellas" Lightning Storm Pick of the Week
Arizona -25 over TEXAS SAN ANTONIO - Arizona vs who? Rich Rod puts up points and AZ has been blowing teams out by 35 a game. It also appears Rich Rod learned how to coach defense since Arizona has only given up 13 points total so far this season. It seems like this UTSA team isn't all that bad, but AZ has the potential to win this game by 50. Place a lightning bet on this one and get your calculator ready because you're gonna be adding up dollars for every point scored.

Standard Play
JONNY FOOTBALL +9 over Bama - No real rationale here. In fact, Bama probably wins this one in a blowout. But I LOVE Jonny Football so I have to bet on him so I can root for him.

Bonus Play
The "They're Already Holding Players Only Meetings" Lock Tease
BC +20 over USC and Saints +2 over Bucs - I usually don't include teasers on here, nor do I mix and match college and NFL picks, but this is too good to pass up. Both USC and Tampa Bay have turned on their coaches and are ready to implode. Tease BC up, tease the Saints down, and start counting your money.

NFL Week 1 Recap

2013-09-14T07:47:00.003-07:00

Well it wasn't the best start, but I always tend to have a tough time the first couple weeks before I've had a chance to see the teams actually play. With 2 weeks of NCAA and 1 week of NFL under my belt, I expect things to pick up significantly next week.

Below is a recap of last week''s picks. Winners are in black and losers in red as usual.

College
Standard Play
PSU/Eastern Michigan UNDER 49.5 - PSU put up 5 more points than I thought, but the defense did their part and held Eastern Michigan to zero points so the Under should have hit. Unfortunately we gave them a free TD on a fumble-6 that blew up the spread.

Lock Pick
Syracuse +17 over NORTHWESTERN - Thank God I cancelled this bet. Don't bet against the Cats. In fact, be sure to bet on them for the foreseeable future.

MEGA Lock Pick
Notre Dame +5.5 over MICHIGAN - Woof. Never listen to me when I bet on or against ND because I somehow always find a way to lose.

NFL
Lock Picks
The "Lock of the Millennium for This Week" Bet
BROWNS -2 over the Dolphins - Either I was wrong about the Browns and they're gonna be just a shitty as everyone thought this year or I was wrong about the Dolphins and they're gonna be pretty legit this year. I think it's a mixture of both. The Browns offense still has a ways to go but they're D will keep them competitive and the Dolphins are better than I thought they'd be on both sides of the ball.

The "Trap Game that your Bookie Wishes You Didn't Know About" Bet
JETS +5.5 over the Bucs - The Bucs look like they're about to implode, bet against them for the foreseeable future. The Jets are no good but somehow they seem to hang around so it will be tough to bet against them since they'll be big dogs in every game.

MEGA Lock Picks - 0-1
Lock Picks - 1-1
Standards Picks - 0-1
This Week 1-3
NFL - 1-1
College - 0-2
3-Team Tease -
OVERALL - 1-3

NFL Week 1

2013-09-08T09:55:00.003-07:00

We're having some technical difficulties uploading our podcast for the Season Preview (probably because I am still pretty drunk from last night and have literally no idea what the fuck I'm doing), so stay tuned and we'll post it as soon as we work out the kinks. In the meantime, it's time to make some money, so let's start talking LOCKS.

Lock Picks
The "Lock of the Millennium for This Week" Bet
BROWNS -2 over the Dolphins - I'm telling you, the Browns are gonna be sneaky good this year. Solid defense, decent O-Line to support a good running attack, and a much improved passing game. The Dolphins, on the other hand, will be one of the worst teams in the league this year. Take the Brownies playing at home in the Dawg Pound for BIG money.

The "Trap Game that your Bookie Wishes You Didn't Know About" Bet
JETS +5.5 over the Bucs - Do I hate this bet? Yes. Are the Jets probably the worst team in the league this season? Absolutely? But EVERYONE is betting their life savings on the Bucs this week. Why would Vegas open a line this low unless they were setting a trap to steal all of our money? I'm not falling for it, and I'm placing my money with Vegas on the J-E-T-S Jets Jets Jets!

Editors Note - I already regret having posted this pick. The Jets are gonna get fucking SMOKED and I'm gonna lose all my money - I can feel it in my plums.

NFL 2013 Season Preview & Futures Bets

2013-09-08T09:51:00.001-07:00

It's that time of year again - summer is over, and it's time to get back to work. Most people wouldn't be looking forward to working weekends, but I know I can't wait. My M-F day job is nothing more than supplemental income because I'm making all my real money Saturday and Sunday picking nothing but LOCKS for both College and NFL football.

Below is the inaugural "Bankrupt The Book" podcast, brought to you by The Money Store. In the podcast I'm gonna cover Futures Bets for the upcoming NFL Season. This is my first time ever doing a podcast and there is A LOT more work involved in creating a podcast than I could have ever imagined. It's a work in progress and very raw at this point in time, but bear with us while we work out the kinks. We're gonna try and do one podcast per week if we can, so be on the lookout for them every Friday. I'm not sure what the format is going to be, chances are it's gonna evolve from week to week until we find a format that we like. Feedback is always welcome so feel free to post suggestions in the comments section. I forgot to cover my Super Bowl Picks, so here they are:

NFC: New Orleans Saints
AFC: Denver Broncos
Champs: New Orleans Saints

NFL Week 1 (College Football Picks)

2013-09-07T08:08:00.002-07:00

As most of you know, I typically steer clear of betting college football the first 2 weeks of the season because it's too unpredictable. However, I've got the itch today so I'll be posting a few picks throughout the course of the day. Here is your pick for the noon games, stay tuned for more picks as the day progresses.

Standard Play
PSU/Eastern Michigan UNDER 49.5 - I think the PSU offense is still a little too raw to put up 40 points and I don't see our defense giving up more than 10.

Lock Pick
Syracuse +17 over NORTHWESTERN - All NU does is cover spreads, but Vegas is starting to overcompensate for this with some outrageously large lines like this one. I think my Wildcat insider described the reasons why you can't bet on them in this game best when he told me "Their QB1 is questionable, their RB1 is limited, they have a new CB, and their playing a decent Cuse team." I hate to go against my boys, but take the Cuse and the points. Fuck that, I can't go against the Cats after last season. If you think it's too many point then sit this one out, but you can't bet against NU.

MEGA Lock Pick
Notre Dame +5.5 over MICHIGAN - I HATE betting on the Domers, but the underdog has covered 21 of the last 25 games in this series. Bet with the odds in what I think is a pretty evenly matched game.

NFL 2014 Thursday Night Kickoff Game

2013-09-05T13:01:00.003-07:00

Standard Pick
Ravens +7.5 over Broncos - I don't love this game, but as a rule of thumb you always have to bet on the first game of the NFL season.

I think the Ravens underachieve this year, but 7.5 is too many points. If there is one thing that should light a fire under your ass, it's opening as a 10 point dog when you're the defending Super Bowl Champs. Not only that, but you're playing against a team that you beat in the playoffs on your way to the title last year. That's just Vegas spitting right in you eyeball, Baltimore.

If the Ravens have a single ounce of pride they will show up and win this game outright (great value at +270), but take the points just to be safe.

PS - I've lost every NFL opener that I can ever remember betting on, so keep that in mind when placing your action.

Editor's Note - We'll have a season preview coming soon, just wanted to get a pick out there for tonight for all my fellow degenerates.

NFL Playoffs/New Years Eve Bowls - BCS Championship Bowl Recap

2013-03-06T10:47:00.001-08:00

College
MEGA Lock Picks
OK St. -17 over Purdue - Blowout City. I should have put my life savings on this game.

Northwestern -2 over Miss St. - The Wildcats come through again. They covered all but 1 spread this season (11-1 ATS) and that was against our other horse, the Penn State Nittany Lions. I look for them to be a sleeper again next year so get on the bandwagon now while there's still room.

Notre Dame +10 over the gayest part of America, Alabama! - This is my fault. I've bet against Bama in the last 3 National Championship games and they've crushed me every time. New rule: you don't bet against Nick Saban in a BCS Championship game no matter how big the spread.

Lock Picks
VANDY -7.5 over NC St. - NC St. kept it close for awhile but their QB, who is supposedly one of the best "arms" in college football and was being touted as possibly the most NFL ready QB, played like shit. This dude is not even close to NFL ready. I like Vandy's coach and think they will continue to be a nice gambling play while he's there.

LSU -5.5 over Clemson - Didn't see any of this game but Clemson continues to own me in bowl games. Can't bet with em, can't bet against em.

Georgia -9 over Nebraska - Nebraska hung around for a bit but Georgia had too much fire power. I hate to say it but you just have to bet on the SEC against the Big 10.

Florida -14 over Louisville - This one hurt. I'm sorry, but nobody in their right mind could've seen this one coming. Arguably the biggest upset in BCS history. Congrats to any idiots who had the balls to pick Louisville.

Texas A&M -3 over OK - Johnny football. I love this kid and can't wait to bet on him again next year.

NFL
Wildcard Weekend
Lock Picks
TEXANS -5 over Bengals - Texans didn't look like a team that can win the Super Bowl, but they're still a team that can cover a 5 point spread against the Bungels.

Seattle -3 over REDSKINS - The Skins looked scary until RG3 got hurt, but after that they didn't stand a chance. Russell Wilson is a flat out winner and will be a gambling horse to ride for years to come.

Standard Play
GREEN BAY -7.5 over Minny -Turns out Christian Ponder is better than Joe Webb, and that ain't saying much. The Vikings never stood a chance with him out there.

Colts +7 over RAVENS - Ravens look like they're ready for a run at the Super Bowl. I never thought the Colts could win but I thought they'd keep it closer.

Division Championships
Standard Play
Moneyline Money-Making Underdog Parlay
Ravens +330, Packers +135, Seahawks +130 Moneyline Parlay (Payout 22:1) - I didn't like any games this week so I figured I'd go low risk, high reward. The Ravens had the comeback of the year in Denver, the Packers looked like they need to make some changes if they want to be a serious contender again, and Russell Wilson won the Seahawks the game until they the D somehow gave it away. Not counting this against the record since it was such a long shot, but it was a fun bet nonetheless.

Conference Championships
Lock Pick
The "Colin Kapernick looks like a black version of Skeeter from the show Doug so I can't bet on him" Lock Pick
FALCONS +5 over 49ers -Well the Falcons came out screaming and went up big, but in typical Falcons fashion they took their foot off the gas and let the 49ers back in it and lost it (but still covered the spread). They look like they have the tools to be a championship team, but some of the dumb plays and coaching mistakes make you wonder. The 49ers looks legit though and I would not want to run into them in the Super Bowl.

Ravens +10 over PATS - This was a beat down from start to finish. With the exception of the Pats win over a Tim Tebow led Broncos team last year they have looked awful in the post-season the past few seasons. Joe Flacco is having a post season for the ages, we'll see if he can keep it going for the big game in 2 weeks.

Super Bowl Sunday
Mega Lock Pick
The "All of Your Friends Think It's a Lock Thus It Must Be a Loser" Lock
49ers -4 over Ravens - I gotta be honest, I did think the 49ers were going to beat the Ravens because EVERYONE loved the Ravens. For as shitty a QB he is in the regular season, Flacco shows up for the playoffs. I don't think he deserves the pay day that he just got, but it's hard to argue against it. I also think that a lot of his post-season success can be attributed to Boldin, who morphs into a mega-beast every post-season. If they can't re-sign him I will be betting against Flacco in the playoffs for the foreseeable future.

Master Lock Picks - 2-2 (17-12-2 Overall)
Lock Picks - 7-2 (48-36 Overall)
Standards Picks - 1-1 (54-58-1 Overall)
This Week 10-5
NFL - 5-2 (65-63-2 Overall)
College - 5-3 (49-41-1 Overall)
3-Team Tease - 0-0 (2-2 Overall)
OVERALL - 112-106-3

Super Bowl Prop Bet Recap

2013-03-06T10:04:00.001-08:00

Mega Lock Pick
Lock of the Millennium
Coin Toss: TAILS (-110) - Five years in a row for heads. Double up on tails next year! We're due!
Standard Plays
What Color will the Gatorade (or liquid) be that is dumped on the Head Coach of the Winning Super Bowl Team? - Orange (3/1) - No Gatorade bath so it was a push unless your bookie is a dick.

Who will throw more TD passes - Joe Flacco or Colin Kaepernick? - Colin Kaepernick (+110) - Loss

Colin Kaepernick Total Rushing Yards Over/Under 50.5: OVER (-115) - Easy W

Will there be a Special Teams or Defensive Touchdown scored in the game? Yes (+145)

Total Baltimore Ravens Punts in the Game: Over/Under 5 - OVER (EVEN)

Total Points Scored by Both Teams Combined (46-50 pts at 5/1)

Will Anquan Boldin (BAL) score a TD in the game? Yes (+130)

Will Ed Reed (BAL) Intercept a Pass Yes (+250)

Value Plays
Super Bowl MVP
Aldon Smith - 50/1
Ed Reed - 33/1
Michael Crabtree - 15/1
Anquan Boldin - 18/1

Super Bowl Prop Record - 4-4-1 (a winning record with the odds)

NFL Season Player Prop Bet Recap

2013-03-06T08:59:00.004-08:00

Player Props
- Michael Turner under 1000 rushing yards
- Ryan Fitzpatrick over 22.5 passing TDs
- Fred Jackson over 1050 rushing yards
- Greg Olsen over 550.5 receiving yards
- Matt Forte over 1050 rushing yards
- Brandon Marshall over 90.5 receptions
- Calvin Johnson over 1300 receiving yards
- Andrew Luck over 23.5 TDs
- Reggie Wayne over 975.5 receiving yards
- Donald Brown over 825.5 rushing yards
- Austin Collie over 675 receiving yards
- Blaine Gabbert over 15.5 passing TDs
- Jamal Charles over 1000 rushing yards
- Peyton Hillis over 5.5 TDs
- Wes Welker over 1050 receiving yards
- Aaron Hernandez over 825.5 receiving yards
- Aaron Hernandez over 6.5 TDs
- Brandon Llyod over 925.5 receiving yards
- Drew Brees over 4500 passing yards
- Drew Brees over 37.5 passing TDs
- Jimmy Graham over 1100 receiving yards
- LeSean McCoy over 1100 rushing yards
- Antonio Brown over 1100 receiving yards
- Russell Wilson over 10.5 starts
- Danny Amendola over 70.5 catches
- Jake Locker over 17.5 passing TDs
- Chris Johnson over 1150 rushing yards
- Kenny Britt over 5 receiving TDs

Season Record - 13-15

NFL Week 17 Recap

2013-03-06T08:43:00.002-08:00

College
MEGA Lock Pick
Texas Tech -13.5 over Minny - Well, Texas Tech was the team this year that abused me week after week, and like a battered life I just kept coming back for more convincing myself that they had changed. I wish that dickhead Tommy Tuberville was still going to be there next season so I could make my money back betting against him. However, I feel like he might actually be successful at Cincy next year since he's coaching in an inferior conference....ah shit, he's already sucking me back in for another beating come next year.

Lock Picks
Oregon St. -3 over Texas - Texas came on strong the second half of the season. I never really bought into them and it ended up costing me a lot of money. They might be a team to watch come next season.

TCU -2.5 over Mich St. -As you can see, I didn't have a very good daywith my picks.

Standard Plays
CUSE +4.5 over WVU - WVU was a sucker bet and I was happy to be on the other side of it for once. I wish I would've buzzed it but as least it finally got me a winner on the board.

Navy +14 over AZ St. - Blowout city. I got talked into this one and should've just stayed away. AZ St. was one of the most unpredictable teams this season and, much to my chagrin, they showed up to play for this game.

NFL
MEGA Lock Pick
BRONCOS -16 over Chiefs - I called for a 40 point victory but only got a 35 point one. Hell, I guess I'll still take it.

Lock Pick
SEATTLE -11 over Rams - Close but not quite enough. Get ready to ride the Seahawks in the playoffs.

Packers -3.5 over MINNY - This game was pathetic. Not a good look for the Packers heading into the playoffs.

Standard Pick
SAINTS -5 over Mopy Dick Cam Newton - I think I lost every game I bet on involving the Saints regardless if I was betting on or against them. Cam and the Panthers came on strong at the end of the year so it should be interesting to see if they can carry any of that momentum over into 2013.

INDY +250 over Texans - Indy wins an emotional game for Chuckstrong and Houston looks suspect heading into the playoffs.

Jacksonville +170 over TITANS - I don't even want to talk about this game. Two punt return TDs and two pick-6's for the Titans. Never bet on a team as bad as Jacksonville, it will never end well.

Master Lock Picks - 1-1 (15-10-2 Overall)
Lock Picks - 0-4 (41-34 Overall)
Standards Picks - 2-3 (53-57-1 Overall)
This Week 3-8
NFL - 2-4 (65-63-2 Overall)
College - 1-4 (44-38-1 Overall)
3-Team Tease - 0-0 (2-2 Overall)
OVERALL - 102-101-3

Super Bowl XLVII Mega Lock Pick

2013-02-03T14:51:00.001-08:00

Mega Lock Pick
The "All of Your Friends Think It's a Lock Thus It Must Be a Loser" Lock
49ers -4 over Ravens - I won't sit here and bore you with statistical analysis. If you want numbers you can go to covers or one of the other popular gambling websites. What I will tell you is that the every mush I know LOVES the Ravens. I'm serious. Text the biggest loser you know right now and ask them who they like tonight. What did they tell you? They said Ravens are a LOCK? And that is your cue to bet on the other team.

I don't particularly like the -4 spread but Vegas doesn't lose on the Super Bowl. Bet against your loser friends (and with the house) and have something to feel good about while you're sitting at your desk tomorrow hungover as fuck.

Super Bowl XLVII Prop Bets

2013-02-03T14:38:00.001-08:00

Mega Lock Pick
Lock of the Millennium
Coin Toss: TAILS (-110) - The coin toss has been Heads the last 4 years. The coin toss never hit the same side 5 times in a row for the Super Bowl. The law of averages says that we're due for Tails to hit this year. Take whatever you were amount you were down this season and bet it all on Tails because this bet is a stone cold lock.

Standard Plays
What Color will the Gatorade (or liquid) be that is dumped on the Head Coach of the Winning Super Bowl Team? - Orange (3/1) - While under the influence last night my friends and I all decided that Orange was the pick. No idea why we decided this, but I'm just gonna go with it.

Who will throw more TD passes - Joe Flacco or Colin Kaepernick? - Colin Kaepernick (+110) - Everyone is on Flacco's dick because he's been good in the playoffs but I think Kaepernick is the better QB. I would take him at -110 so at +110 it's too good to pass up.

Colin Kaepernick Total Rushing Yards Over/Under 50.5: OVER (-115) - The Ravens have played 2 other running QBs this year (RG3 and Vick) and both went over 50 yards rushing.

Will there be a Special Teams or Defensive Touchdown scored in the game? Yes (+145)

Total Baltimore Ravens Punts in the Game: Over/Under 5 - OVER (EVEN)

Total Points Scored by Both Teams Combined (46-50 pts at 5/1) - Vegas set the Over/Under at 48 so I'll bet with Vegas at 5/1 odds.

Will Anquan Boldin (BAL) score a TD in the game? Yes (+130) - Quan has to be involved if the Ravens want to have a chance in this game.

Will Ed Reed (BAL) Intercept a Pass Yes (+250) - Ed hasn't been that much of a difference maker this playoffs. He's due and will definitely be showing up for the Super Bowl.

Value Plays
Super Bowl MVP
Aldon Smith - 50/1
Ed Reed - 33/1
Michael Crabtree - 15/1
Anquan Boldin - 18/1

AFC Championship Lock Pick

2013-01-20T17:49:00.002-08:00

Lock Pick
Ravens +10 over PATS - The Ravens seem like a team of destiny. They're still riding the emotional high of the Ray Lewis retirement announcement and it looks like Joe Flacco may actually be a serviceable quarterback come playoff time. A 10 point spread is ridiculous for a Conference Championship game, let alone one between 2 teams that are playoff rivals. There is no way the Pats blow the Ravens out in a game with this much on the line.

The Pats lost Gronk last game and I don't know that they'll be able to make up for his lost production. The Ravens D will keep this game within reach and it will come down to the final procession. I think the Ravens shock the Pats and pull off the upset with a field goal at the end of regulation.

NFC Championship Lock Pick

2013-01-20T11:46:00.001-08:00

Lock Pick
The "Colin Kapernick looks like a black version of Skeeter from the show Doug so I can't bet on him" Lock Pick
FALCONS +5 over 49ers - The line on this game is staggering. I personally think the Seahawks are better than the 9ers, but at the least they are evenly matched. The Seahawks were 3 point dogs in ATL last week, but somehow the 9ers are 5 point favorites? That's an 8 point swing which is unheard of.

Vegas knows that the public is overreacting to Kapernick's amazing game last week against the Packers so they set this line 3-4 points higher than they really should have. Atlanta was dominating Seattle until Abraham got hurt, and as of now he is slated to play today. The Falcons defense will be able to key in on Kapernick and keep his rushing in check. The Falcons offense will be able to throw on the 49ers D and put points on the board. Now that Matt Ryan has got the monkey off of his back I think he'll finally submit the type of playoff game he is capable of.

Looks for the Falcons to take the lead, blow it, and then somehow put points up at the last second to pull out the W.

NFL Divisional Championship Weekend

2013-01-12T13:29:00.003-08:00

I don't particularly love like anything this weekend. Thus, we're gonna go low risk, high reward this weekend.

Standard Play
Moneyline Money-Making Underdog Parlay
Ravens +330, Packers +135, Seahawks +130 Moneyline Parlay (Payout 22:1) -
I was sold on the the 49ers D-Line crushing Rodgers until I read an article about how slighted Rodgers feels about the 9ers passing on him in the '05 draft. He's gonna come out and have one of those 400 yard/5 TD games.

The Broncos should (and definitely could) blow out the Ravens. But Peyton is traditionally bad in the playoffs, outdoors, and in the cold (all of which are in play today). The Ravens are rallying behind one last run with The Murderer Ray Lewis, and for some reason I get the feeling they might pull this one out. At +330, those odds are too good to pass up.

The Seahawks are on fire. This game scares me because EVERYONE loves the Hawks even though they are dogs according to Vegas. But the Falcons haven't impressed me against good teams this year. The Falcons are mentally soft and the Seahawks are as mentally tough as it gets. Per the usual, Russel Wilson gets it done when it matters and Matty Ice doesn't

College Football BCS National Championship

2013-01-07T16:35:00.000-08:00

MEGA Lock Pick
Notre Dame +10 over the gayest part of America, Alabama! - Listen, nobody loves betting against the Domers more than me. Every single year they are overrated and every year they under perform. Vegas skews the spread about 3-5 points against ND because their fans are such a bunch of homers, and betting against them is typically the easiest money you'll make all season.

Not this year though - this year I have paid the price for going against them. Their win against Oklahoma in OK cost me about 1,000 Junior Bacon Cheeseburgers (and they aren't on the dollar menu anymore). They also beat Stanford who turned out to be a very legit team. I just think this year's team is a team of destiny.

Also, the 3rd year seems to be the charm for Fighting Irish coaches. Frank Leahy won a national title in his third year at Notre Dame. So did Ara Parseghian. And Dan Devine. And Lou Holtz. This is Brian Kelly's third year, and I think he gets his title tonight.

The SEC is overrated this year and so is Alabama. The Irish shock the Tide and win the BCS title tonight. I'd take the points to be safe, but I'll be throwing a little moneyline parlay on the Domers to win as well and think you all should too.

Now get out there and bet like a champion today...

NFL Wildcard Weekend Sunday

2013-01-06T09:28:00.003-08:00

Nice little day yesterday. I hope you all enjoyed watching the Joe Webb show just as much as I did. Turns out the Vikes are better off with Ponder under center after all. Alright, let's get to today's games.

Lock Pick
Seattle -3 over REDSKINS - Everyone is talking about how Seattle is 3-5 on the road. I don't care about that. They were in everyone of those games and could've easily won a few more of them. RG3 isn't at full speed and this Seattle D is ferocious. And as good as RG3 is, I think Russell Wilson is better. It's a close game, but Seattle walks out of Washington with a win.

Standard Play
Colts +7 over RAVENS - I have to pick an underdog to cover this weekend and I think the Colts are the team that does it. The Redskins are the popular dog pick, but as you saw above I'm not buying into that. I'm buying into the Colts riding the emotion of CHUCKStrong, and now the illness of their OC and interim coach Bruce Ariens (who won't be coaching today), to try and shock the Ravens. I thought this was 100% an upset win for them, but now with Ray Lewis announcing his retirement I'm not so sure. I think the Ravens will take the lead, Luck will lead a comeback charge, but eventually the Ravens pull out the win by a FG.

NFL Wildcard Weekend Saturday

2013-01-05T15:57:00.002-08:00

Lock Pick
TEXANS -5 over Bengals - Sorry, this post is late. We're looking good but we're still in garbage time TD/backdoor cover territory. Bengals beat the teams they should beat and lose to the teams they should lose too. They should, and will, lose to the Texans. Houston by 14.

Standard Play
GREEN BAY -7.5 over Minny - This line is now at -10 because of this whole Joe Webb/Christian Ponder thing. To be honest, I think Webb may be better than Ponder because of his blackness/running ability. If anything, I'm more scared if he ends up starting. Regardless, I think The Packers roll at home. They get ahead early and, since Minny doesn't have a real QB, they can't comeback.

College Football Cotton Bowl Pick

2013-01-04T16:51:00.001-08:00

Lock Pick
Texas A&M -3 over OK - A&M's losses were to Florida and LSU earlier in the season and they have been on fire since then. OK's 2 losses were also to tough teams, but OK has a reputation for not showing up for big games. I bet the Johnny Football shows everyone what the hype is about on the big stage tonight with a win over the Sooners.

College Football Sugar Bowl Pick

2013-01-02T13:22:00.002-08:00

Lock Pick
Florida -14 over Louisville - Anyone who watched Louisville play a team outside of the Big East this season knows that they are a farce. Sure, you could argue that this game matters more to them than a Florida team who had National Title aspirations, but this is still a BCS Bowl Game. The line recently moved to -14.5 but you literally can't set this line high enough. I will be increasing my bet on this buzzer and I think you should do the same.