bila hati bersuara

Inspirasi

2013-09-05T00:51:00.001+10:00

Counting the days leading up to 16th of September, I came across a very interesting article on the topics being discussed by Malaysians, again and again in a never ending cycle. And the quote excerpt below gives me a sense of hope, knowing that we used to start with unity at the beginning, and we can remain united at the end.

The road to nationhood has not been an easy journey. Surprises and disappointments, tension and crisis, have marred the way. The peoples of Malaysia, however, have endured all trials and tribulations with confidence and patience, calmness and forbearance, with faith in our final goal –Malaysia. The Federation of Malaya now passes into history. Let us always remember that the Malayan Nation was formed after many difficulties during a long period of national Emergency, yet its multi-racial society emerged, endured and survived as a successful and progressive nation, a true democracy and an example to the world of harmony and tolerance. As it was with Malaya, so it can be with Malaysia. With trust in Almighty God, unity of purpose and faith in ourselves, we can make Malaysia a land of prosperity and peace. In doing so let every Malaysian in all the States of Malaya, Singapore, Sarawak and Sabah ensure that our Malaysia is truly worthy of the aims and hopes we have shared, the trials and stress, we have endured, in working together to achieve our common destiny.

- excerpt from Tunku Abdul Rahman’s speech on Malaysia Day, 16 September 1963.

The full article can be viewed at: http://www.loyarburok.com/2010/09/16/the-only-merdekakanmalaysia-run-5th-47-years-on-malaysia-and-the-necessary-conversation/

"Selamat Hari Malaysia, tanah tumpahnya darahku."

'Perfectionist'

2013-05-21T23:10:00.000+10:00

I'm not a perfectionist but I always try to make sure I do everything almost perfectly. This goes for everything, even when I'm working on something I know isn't going to come out good.

When I started doing my essay assignment at the last minute, say 2 days before the deadline for a 5000 words assignment, I'll make sure the alignment is justified, the format is synchronized across the essay, I use the correct fonts etc. This goes on until I'm fully satisfied that the assignment is perfect, to my standard, in terms of its presentation even when the content may not be as good.

This one happened today.

I was on my way back from the hospital when I decided to stop by the 99Mart to get some snacks. I guess my so called 'perfectionist' habit decided to kicks in because instead of parking on the road side for a quick 2 minutes grocery, I did a reverse parking into one of the empty parking spot next to the shop, right between two other cars on either side. And as if that's not enough, I even made sure I parked correctly, going back and forth so that the space between my car and the other two cars were almost equal! Gosh, me and my perfect habit.

But regardless, I still managed to get my groceries. So that's ok.

Till next time.

Malaysian Folklore

2013-05-08T03:23:00.000+10:00

I'm embarking on a new project to share stories of Malaysian Fables & Folk Tales. I have no rights or ownership whatsoever to the stories I shared, nor do I gain any profit from it. My intention is purely to share the long forgotten stories that we rarely hear nowadays, for the future generations to view. There are subtle hidden messages behind these folk tales and stories, which I believe conveys some of the moral values we often overlook.

The message I hope to send out by sharing the stories is to reflect on ourselves and absorb the moral values hidden within the stories. In doing so, may we all become a better person and improve upon our weaknesses.

To view the stories, click here or go to malaysiantales.tumblr.com.

Enjoy reading and do share it with everyone, especially your kids!

Lorekan

2013-04-06T07:40:00.001+11:00

Buah kelapa sawit sebelum diproses. Sebagai tanda membuka lembaran baru.

Sudah lama tidak menulis. Hati ini kian rindu hendak melorek sesuatu di balik lembaran putih yang terpampang luas buat tatapan umum ini. Namun apakan daya, menulis menggunakan papan-taip manakan sama seperti menulis menggunakan pena. Perasaannya berbeza. Apa yang sering dibelek-belek hanyalah kitaran yang sama diubahsuai berulang kali. Tiada penambahan baru. Tiada peningkatan intelek. Tiada isi, tiada kandungan.

Biarlah tulisan ini menjadi pembuka buat tahun ini. Biarlah tulisan ini mahupun lambat, menjadi perasmi di laman sesawang ini.

Ku pasang cita-cita baru. Biar yang lama kita simpan jadi pekasam. Bukan pekasam tak disingkap. Tapi pekasam yang makin lama kita simpan, makin sedap jadinya. Lalu setelah beberapa ketika, kita ungkap kembali, kita belek dan kita lihat. Mungkin pada masa itu, lebih sedap rasa dan perasaannya.

Yang baru pula kita asah biar jadi impian. Impian yang boleh dinyatakan. Bukan sekadar impian dalam mimpi. Itu impian mat jenin. Yang ini kita pasang sekadar mampu. Asahan demi asahan lama-lama tajam mata yang tumpul. Kelak boleh kita berdiri tegap, dada membidang, apabila asahan yang kita kerjakan, membuahkan hasil yang kita impikan.

Biar di sini saja ku hentikan lorekan pertama ku. Ku risau orang yang membaca kian curiga dengan apa yang ku fikir. Inilah hasil tulisan orang tidak berseni. Jangan di hina, jangan di maki. Semua kritikan, simpan lah sendiri.

Someone

2012-12-08T12:50:00.000+11:00

From my writing collections.

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At first you were no one,

And then you could be anyone.

Soon after you became someone,

Before you can be the one.

But as someone you shall remain.

Until a time when we meet again.

And I will not lose hope in vain,

For as long as my heart can contain.

Space

2012-09-17T18:23:00.001+10:00

The sky was cloudy that day. I was walking back from hospital, along my usual route. As I make a turn at a curb, just two junctions away from my house, I saw a young boy, just got out of his house. He was wearing a glove in his left hand. And he's wearing that mask baseball players usually wear during a game. On his right hand, he was carrying some sort of small cones.

As he walked out of the house, he went to every corner of the small garden on his front yard. He laid down those small cones every time he stops. One after another, until it finally looked like a border all around the small garden of his.

There was no particular reason for me to be amazed by this young boy's action. But there must be something more to it, that I stopped in my tracks, even for a short moment, and turned my head to get a clearer look at this young boy. Yet, it was very brief, for I was afraid the neighbours might saw me and thought I'm a paedophile. Which of course, I'm not.

Within that brief moment, a thought popped up in my head. Or rather, a memory that has long faded away, suddenly came back, with some questions.

"How can he play baseball in that small garden? There's no space at all!"

And this brings me back to 17 years ago.

----------

I'm at my house in Malaysia. The place where I grew up as a child. The home where I learn about the world.

I looked through the window and saw my older brother outside. I looked around and realized that I was getting ready myself. I got out of the house and my brother was waiting with a football underneath his right leg.

It's our usual evening activity, playing soccer outside our house, on that cemented floor. We have the house gates as our goals and the whole floor as our playground. Anything beyond the cemented floor is considered 'outside'.

It wasn't very big. The space to move around was limited. Because of that, we had to use all our skills to dribble the ball pass our opponent. We turned and twisted. We shielded the ball and we did whatever technique known to us, to score the goal. I was always at the losing end. My brother used the advantage of having the bigger physique to full use.

Nevertheless, the space was enough for us to reach the goal. And more importantly, we had fun. At the end of it, we both carved a smile on our faces. The ones you see on someone truly satisfied. The type that make others smile with you.

----------

I was walking towards my house, after a brief distraction earlier. This time, my head was filled with answers to my own question. Subconsciously, I delved further to grasp the deeper meaning of that thought. It's always been my thing. To over-think things.

Finally, I settled with the idea that space, is something everyone needs. How big it is, depends on the baggage that someone is carrying. And as we grow older, the more baggage we're carrying. We want space for each of our desires. We need space for all our responsibilities. The space to breath. The space to relax. Our very own space.

But space is not something we easily get.

Just like the sky is not within our reach, the space beyond it is even far.

And those who make do with whatever space they have, will be the one who reach their goals. They will be the one who carved a smile on their face. Just like 17 years ago.

Dream

2012-01-18T03:41:00.000+11:00

From my writing collections.

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I dreamt of you last night. Even in MY dream, I still find it hard to talk to you normally. There's something about you that makes me feel inferior every time I'm around you. You're just so, sweet.

I do stupid things whenever you're there. I became clumsy, I became weird. Everything I do isn't right. I can feel the red hot flushes appearing on my cheeks. My ears became hot. And I became anxious.

I tried to act normal. I tried to act tough. I even tried to show some of my good sides! But everything I did just went wrong. Instead of normal, I believe you noticed me being different. Instead of tough, I appeared vulnerable. Instead of my good side, you saw the weaker side of me.

The dream was real. The feeling in the dream was real. How I wish I can just talk to you normally. How I wish we can just chat and have conversation about anything.

But that is not possible. Even in MY dream, I still find it hard to talk to you normally.

MY Dream.

Review: Love & Other Drugs

2012-01-13T04:41:00.000+11:00

This article is written to You, You, yes You, oops, not You. Aha, You too.

Haha. Ok dah lama rasa nak start post dengan ayat di atas tapi masih tak kesampaian. Jadi cuba la pakai untuk kali ni mana tau sesuai. Masa bayangkan dalam kepala rasa macam best lepas dah tulis nampak macam lame pulak. Sigh.

Anyway, entri kali ni merupakan satu review atau dalam bahasa Malaysia-nya ulasan mengenai filem tajuknya seperti yang tertera di atas.

Dah lama dah cerita ni keluar tapi tak berpeluang nak tengok. Dengar orang cakap je. Gandingan pelakon dah best. Ada Anne Hathaway. Itu je lah yang aku ingat. Nama hero tak ingat, harap maaf. Supaya entri ni tak panjang lebar dan melalut sampai hilang tujuan sebenar, maka hanya point-point utama je akan diulas.

1. Cerita ni bermula dengan kisah seorang kasanova yang memang tiada masalah untuk mendekati sebarang wanita. Taktik-taktik dia untuk berkenalan dengan wanita (ada satu je yang dihuraikan) memang best. Tapi hero ni ada masalah kurang yakin pada diri sendiri atau low self-esteem. Dia berkebolehan tapi tak cuba untuk menggunakan kebolehan dia untuk kebaikan diri sendiri. Sampailah ke suatu saat di pertengahan jalan cerita.

2. Sepanjang jalan cerita, aku tertarik dengan perubahan demi perubahan yang berlaku pada watak hero yang kasanova. Perubahan besar berlaku selepas dia jumpa dengan watak heroin, tak lain tak bukan ialah watak Maggie lakonan Anne Hathaway. Sedikit sebanyak aku boleh kaitkan cerita ni dengan diri sendiri sebab tu bagi aku cerita ni best. First time dia jumpa Maggie masa dia menyamar sebagai intern di sebuah GP atau klinik swasta. Benda ni aku akan buat sebagai salah satu rotation 4th year tahun ni.

3. Nak dijadikan cerita, Maggie merupakan seorang pesakit yang baru disahkan mempunyai Parkinson Stage 1. Kalau nak tahu lebih lanjut pasal Parkinson, sila lah Wiki. Bagi kita yang sihat, apa lah sangat setakat tangan terketar-ketar sekali-sekala. Tunggu kejap lepas tu sambung lah balik buat kerja. Tapi sebenarnya penyakit ni lebih dari setakat tangan menggigil-gigil secara tiba-tiba. Kalau terjumpa mana-mana pesakit Parkinson cubalah tanya pengalaman dan perasaan mereka semenjak disahkan ada penyakit tu. Luaran tak nampak, tapi dari segi mental dan boleh menjurus kepada rohani, sangat memenatkan dan menyiksakan.

4. Kalau jumpa dengan mana-mana doktor, pesakit Parkinson selalunya akan dirawat dengan tujuan untuk meningkatkan kualiti hidup. Sehingga kini, tiada lagi ubat atau rawatan yang boleh sembuhkan pesakit Parkinson sepenuhnya. Kebanyakan pesakit dirawat dengan end result begitu. To improve quality of life.

Berbalik kepada cerita. Hero filem telah melafazkan kata-kata cinta kepada Maggie (scene ni aku rasa sangat sweet. Nanti cerita) dan pada suatu hari telah bawa heroin pergi ke konvensyen perubatan. Maggie yang tak dapat sesuaikan diri dengan konvensyen, telah pergi ke sebuah lagi pusat 'unconvention' di seberang jalan setelah menerima pelawaan seorang mak cik yang anaknya pun mempunyai Parkinson Stage 3. Maggie hantar pesanan kepada hero untuk join dia dan hero nya pergi ke sana, terserempak dengan seorang pak cik yang mempunyai isteri yang disahkan mempunyai Parkinson Stage 4. Apabila ditanya mengenai tips untuk masa depan, pak cik tu boleh pulak bagi nasihat, tinggalkan Maggie sekarang sebelum terlambat.

5. Dari situ, bermula lah konflik di dalam filem ni. Hero berusaha sedaya-upaya untuk mencari rawatan yang dapat menyembuhkan penyakit Maggie. Sehinggalah pada suatu hari, Maggie tak tahan dengan semua travelling dan perangai hero dan akhirnya mereka berpisah. Hero dinaikkan pangkat untuk bekerja di Chicago dan Maggie pula meneruskan hidup macam biasa. Sedang si hero siap-siap berkemas, dia pasang video yang dirakam sewaktu dia masih dengan Maggie (ni satu lagi elemen dalam cerita ni yang best bagi aku). Habis je rakaman tu, dia terus lari cari Maggie dan dapat tahu Maggie dalam perjalanan ke Canada menaiki bas. Hero filem kejar bas dan berjaya pujuk Maggie untuk turun bercakap dengan dia. Ending dia? Memang cliche la. Ending yang biasa kita tengok dalam filem-filem genre macam ni.

Apa yang aku nak ketengahkan dekat sini bukan lah jalan cerita tapi sesetengah elemen dalam cerita tu yang menjadikan filem tu aku rasa berbaloi ditonton. Elemen watak hero yang ada perwatakan kasanova dan berubah jadi baik, tu biasa. Elemen watak hero yang menyamar jadi doktor in training, tak banyak. Elemen watak heroin ada penyakit tapi cuba untuk tunjukkan yang diri dia sihat dan mampu jaga diri sendiri macam orang lain, tu jarang. Elemen rakaman saat-saat pasangan hero dan heroin menghabiskan masa bersama, tu susah nak jumpa. 3 elemen terakhir merupakan daya tarikan filem ni untuk buat aku melekat depan tv layan sampai habis.

Lepas baca entri yang panjang lebar ni, aku rasa mungkin tak perlu dah tengok filem tu. Tulisan aku ni dah penuh spoiler. Tapi kalau rasa nak pastikan apa yang aku tulis ni betul, boleh lah cuba tengok. Ada satu scene tu aku sampai tumbuk bantal yang aku pegang. Fuh, punya lah tak puas hati masa tu. Bantal jadi mangsa. Sigh.

One of the Black & White recording.

The Hero confessed, first time said it to someone. He's trembling because of that.

There's even photography elements in the movie!

The second Black & White recording from the movie. I love the cinematography.

Oh ye, kalau nak tengok jugak, viewer's discretion is recommended. 18 tahun ke atas sahaja. Kalau yang agak-agak belum cukup umur tu, sila bawak bersabar. Nak tengok jugak jangan sorang-sorang. Takut benda lain pulak jadinya.

Lessons on Road Safety

2012-01-10T05:21:00.002+11:00

Dear Malaysians,

There's a reason why people put traffic lights. And there's reasons why there are three different colours to the lights. Green means you're safe to go. Yellow means slow down your vehicle and get ready to stop. Red, my fellow Malaysians, means STOP. Get that. And you'll be safe.

Dear Malaysians,

There's a reason why there's two lanes going opposite directions prepared. But if you're going to make your own lanes and go against the flow, do not blame others when you're hit by a car. It's pretty obvious, yet you live in your own world. Or perhaps you own the road. Just because you pay road taxes doesn't give you the rights to do so. Other people also pay the same thing and they still know how to follow the rules.

Dear Malaysians,

It's basic lesson to let those from your right to go first if you're at a round about. The term's called 'courtesy'. Even on the road there's courtesy. But I assume since you don't even have that, needless for me to figure out your courtesy level with other people. No wonder Malaysia was placed so terribly in one of the surveys conducted to see how well-mannered Malaysians are in public.

Dear Malaysians,

The reason for writing all these isn't to criticize. I'm a Malaysian myself and no, I did not do all of the above i.e speeding when it's red light, driving against the traffic flow, going first at the round about even when there's another vehicle on my right. Instead, I hope this writing will create some awareness that you're not alone on the road. There's other users besides you who expect you to follow the rules and regulations, just as they do. But if you don't, it's not their job to give you tickets, scold you or do anything. It's the police. Traffic police. So don't worry, we won't stop you from doing what you're doing. We'll probably just snap a photo, send it to The Star and receive RM50 if it gets featured in that interesting photos section. All thanks to you.

Dear Malaysians.

Resolusi 2012

2012-01-07T06:42:00.001+11:00

2012

1. Bermulanya detik tahun baru, setiap orang pasti akan mengemaskini resolusi tahun baru mereka. Pada asalnya, aku sendiri tak mengambil kisah tentang resolusi aku tapi bermula tahun lepas, aku dah tetapkan beberapa perkara yang aku nak capai sepanjang tahun 2011. Alhamdulillah, boleh dikatakan hampir separuh daripada apa yang aku tulis tercapai.

2. Sebelum ni, resolusi aku banyak berkisar kepada apa yang aku nak dapatkan, untuk orang lain. Atau dalam erti kata lain, ada beberapa resolusi aku untuk tahun 2011 adalah untuk menggembirakan pihak lain, selain diri sendiri. Tapi untuk tahun ni, aku buat keputusan untuk hadkan resolusi aku kepada apa yang aku betul-betul nak capai, untuk diri sendiri. InsyaAllah, semoga dipermudahkan segala urusan.

3. Kata orang, kalau kita tulis pun apa yang kita nak capai, tak semestinya kita akan berusaha untuk dapatkan. Tapi itu kata orang. Bagi aku, biarlah apa orang nak kata, yang penting bila aku tulis apa yang aku 'target' sepanjang tahun 2012 ni, semoga ia akan lebih memberi semangat untuk aku berusaha ke arah itu. Sekurang-kurangnya penulisan aku ni boleh menjadi peringatan untuk aku bila aku lupa arah tuju sepanjang tahun. Tapi bak kata Khairy Jamaluddin,

People look their best in January when new year resolution of losing weight & going gym daily still adhered to. Everything goes south after CNY. -5 Jan via Twitter

Semoga ia tak terjadi pada aku.

4. Apa resolusi aku untuk 2012?

Menjadi lebih berdikari dan kurang bergantung kepada keluarga terutama ibu bapa apabila sedang menuntut di Melbourne.
Tumpukan pada pelajaran sebagai 'priority' utama untuk lulus tahun ke-4 kursus perubatan dan insyaAllah sambung dengan lancar ke tahun akhir pada tahun depan.
Mengasah dan menambah ilmu fotografi dan jika berkemampuan, menambah 'equipment' atau 'gear' menjelang hujung tahun.
Mengasah fikiran supaya berfikir secara kritikal apabila berdepan dengan sesuatu isu, sama ada melibatkan diri sendiri atau sekeliling.

5. Kalau dilihat, memang semua pun untuk diri sendiri. Mungkin orang akan kata, "Alah, memang selama ni orang buat 'resolution' untuk diri sendiri je pun." Tapi bagi aku, sebelum ni, aku mempunyai tanggungjawab yang membataskan pilihan aku dalam membuat resolusi. Alhamdulillah, kali ni tiada lagi amanah dan tanggungjawab yang perlu aku penuhi, selain yang tertulis di sebalik semua resolusi baru tu.

6. Aku rasa cukuplah setakat tu bebelan aku untuk malam ni. Semoga Allah S.W.T memberi kekuatan untuk aku terus istiqamah dalam usaha merealisasikan semua Resolusi 2012 aku, insyaAllah.

Poem #7

2011-12-31T16:00:00.000+11:00

Tanpa ku sedar titisan air mata mengalir dari sudut mata ku,

Meninggalkan jejak-jejak kisah lalu yang terkumpul dari masa dulu,

Ketawa, gembira, pahit dan manis, semuanya bercampur menjadi satu,

Menuju ke penghujung sebuah destinasi yang masih tak tentu.

Ku telan, ku rasa, masam dan manis semuanya sama,

Liku-liku hidup sebagai peneman mengisi masa,

Ada yang ku suka, ku simpan ku ingat, tapi ada juga yang ingin aku lupa,

Biar memori kotak hitam ku simpan jauh dari pandangan dunia.

Poem #6

2011-12-22T06:19:00.001+11:00

The smell of the green grass covers my nose,
The wind brushing against my body, through my soul.
The sun is smiling beneath it the clouds are whirling past,
The river is calm as my heart is now.

*I have no idea why I wrote this but just felt like it. Nevertheless, it has a deep meaning.

Tahun Satu

2011-11-05T01:06:00.003+11:00

Hari ni genap dah setahun kelahiran anak saudara pertama aku, Khayr Aiman bin Kadzim. Anak kepada kakak pertama aku, yang lahir tahun lepas time aku tengah study untuk final exam. Dan hari jugakla genap setahun aku tak pernah jumpa anak saudara aku tu.

Kepada khayr, eteh tak sabar nak balik main dengan khayr nanti. Selalu tengok gambar je orang hantar or ummi khayr tag dekat facebook. Nasib baik ada facebook, kalau tak dgr suara khayr merengek jela dari phone. Tu pun bila khayr dah pandai buat bunyi bising.

Eteh balik nanti eteh bawak hadiah khayr which kemungkinan besar adalah pakaian. Haha... Eteh tak mampu lagi la nak beli hadiah mahal-mahal. Khayr dah besar nanti boleh la nak mintak hadiah apa-apa :D

Anyway, happy birthday 'Tahun Satu' Khayr! Eteh tak nak terlepas peluang wish khayr birthday lagi-lagi ni hari lahir khayr yang pertama. InsyaAllah lepas-lepas ni pun eteh wish lagi. Semoga Khayr membesar jadi anak yang soleh, insan yang berguna and insyaAllah, someone yang berjaya dunia akhirat! (:

Eteh

Eid Overseas

2011-08-30T11:44:00.001+10:00

As Eid looming near, there's the sudden feeling of homesickness that grew stronger and stronger each day. Being a guy who loves nothing more than to make his family happy, he tried so much to suppress that feeling and kept telling himself that everything will be okay come Eid.

It's his 4th raya oversea, away from family and even when classes run as usual, he felt like jumping to any first plane available and head back to his family's side to celebrate this joyous occasion. But that's not realistic. Life isn't a movie. You can't expect wonders to happen, without making it happen.

I slept late last night, to shake off that feeling of not celebrating raya with family again this year. What's more with the fact that they're celebrating raya one day earlier, hence they'll make the wish first, they'll post the pictures first when technically, it's supposed to be the other way round, considering the time difference.

Even when I woke up late, as I checked my phone and opened up my laptop, seeing all those wishes, reading the lines, written by my family just makes that sad, empty, homy feeling comes crawling into the chambers deep within my heart and I felt like tears are going to come out any time soon. Hence, comes this post.

---------------

I miss the times when we all gather around, everyone shaking hands and asking for forgiveness, starting with the youngest (Mirah) to the eldest (Kak Long) and finally we all queue in line to shake hands with Mak & Ti. Back then, me and Mirah still receive duit raya.

I miss the times when we gathered in front of Tok's house in JB, waiting eagerly for the night to come, cause that's when we'll show off our skills in playing firecrackers and everyone danced around happily playing sparkles.

I miss the times when we go around to anyone house randomly to celebrate raya and they give out duit raya, even RM1. I miss being woken up early in the morning, to get ready and prepare to go for 'Sembahyang Raya'. Sometimes after we prayed, on the way back, we stopped by 7 Eleven to get some Slurpee, just to brag that we can eat during the day again.

Lastly, I miss all those travelling times from one place to another, even when it's long but then again, it doesn't matter, because in that long period of time, we're all together, at one place. And to me, right now, that's what matters most. Being there with all of you.

---------------

Dear beloved family, relatives, friends and everyone,

Happy Eid Mubarak! Forgive me for any misdeeds and wrongdoings I've done. Here in Melbourne, today's the last day of fasting but insyaAllah, tomorrow will be a joyous occasion.

Eid 2011

2011-08-26T03:54:00.000+10:00

"I'm sorry I can't celebrate Eid with everyone again this year."

"With these hands of mine, I sincerely ask for forgiveness, from a faraway land down under. When we meet again, we shall shake hands and may that brief moment strengthen the bond between us."

"Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri."

With love,

Syah.

An Old Man's Story

2011-08-19T16:52:00.000+10:00

Yesterday while I was driving back home from hospital, I saw an old man walking down the street with a smile on his face and he was holding a cake, carefully packed in a lovely reddish-pinkish box. Straight away, a thought flew through my mind. Following that, an imaginary conversation was made between me and the old man. Here's how the story goes,

Me: Good day, Sir. You seemed very happy today. Something good happened?

Old Man: Good day to you, young man. Haha (laughing). Nothing much, really. I just can't wait to get home!

Me: (Smiling) I see you're holding a cake there. Let me guess, you're celebrating your wife's birthday?

Old Man: Wow, and how'd you figured that out? Haha (laughing). Yeah, today's my wife's birthday and I want to give her a surprise! So I bought this cake and I'll secretly wish her happy birthday.

Me: That's so sweet of you. I wish I have the chance to do the same for my wife in the future. (Smiling)

Old Man: (Smiling) Don't worry, young man. I'm sure you'll get your chance one day. Just be sure she doesn't know it or it wouldn't be a surprise!

After that, my mind produced this imaginary slideshow of how the Old Man returned home, secretly arranged the candles, light them up, hid the cake and when his wife got home, he sang the 'Happy Birthday' song while carrying the cake in his hands. The wife blew the candles with a big smile on her face, happy that even at the age of 63, her husband still go to lengths to celebrate her birthday.

"This is purely a fiction engineered by a bored mind. Not in any way is the story written here meant to have any similarities to anyone."

Hari Bapa Se-Malaysia

2011-06-19T21:25:00.000+10:00

I remembered a time when I was angry with you and after we got out of the lift, I quickly went to a corner and just stood there, sulking, with my arms wrapped around my face, covering the sad expression I tried to contain cause it was un-cool. I didn't remember why or what made me became that way, but I can't forget what you did after.

When everyone else had given up trying to make me feel better, you never did. You went and you came back. You checked on me almost all the time. You asked me what's wrong even though I just sat there sobbing to myself. It's almost 3 hours or so and yet you still remained. Perhaps because it was You, perhaps because I'm familiar with your presence so I took the advantage and continue on with my arrogance. I didn't want to give up! I want to see how far are you willing to go to persuade me. And you went all the way. In the end I gave in. You're very persistent, and I'm grateful for that. I guess that's one reason why you're You. My Father.

Then there's this other time when we just moved from our old house to the hill. It was my birthday. And back then I loved Power Rangers so much that I asked for the Megazord as my birthday present. I knew we're tight on budget at that time. You just got transferred and still adapting to your new work. Yet I was a child at the age of 7 and I can't simply brush off my desires. After pleading for several times and came to conclusion that I won't be getting my present, you came back and surprised me with the gift you brought home. We didn't have any grand celebration or anything. And you played pretend as if there's nothing going on. Maybe, you saw my longing look at the toy whenever we were walking around the toy section in the shops. Or maybe, you planned it all along just to see my reaction when you actually brought it home. But whatever you did, you did it great.

When I thought things aren't going to happen, you made things happen. When I was feeling down and angry, sometimes at myself, you're there to console me and cheer me up.

You'll always be someone I'll look up to. No matter what other people said, I believe what you did, was for the sake of all of us, your family. You showed me the example of the good and the bad. But humans are never perfect. To me, having you as my father is perfect enough. Thank you 'Ti' for being there. Thank you for all the things you've done.

Happy Father's Day. Or rather, Happy Ti's Day.

-From your son, away from home who misses you and everyone else so much.

Start with No.10

2011-06-14T17:55:00.001+10:00

Was browsing through the net and stumbled upon this. The website is intended for men, but I guess the tips are applicable to all. Start with No.10.

Top 10: Habits That Make You More Productive

A New Take on Short Films

2011-06-14T02:18:00.000+10:00

The whole idea behind the short film is new to me. It's as if I discovered Inception but in a different genre. I love the concept and I love to see more of such concept being produced.

Random @Southern Cross Station

2011-06-10T01:11:00.000+10:00

I remembered a time last year when I was suddenly cursed by a young lady trying to catch her train. The incident happened at Southern Cross Station, Melbourne.

It was a chilly night back then. I can't fully recall how I ended up at the station. But from the pieces of memories I have, all I remember was that I was walking through the ticket validation machine and I was collecting my ticket when suddenly this girl who was trying to validate her ticket at the machine next to me didn't manage to do so.

It's just human nature to be curious and wanting to know what happened which caused me to turn my head and looked at what was going on. And it just so happened that at that time, after trying for several times without success, she jumped over the machine's divider (the one that will automatically open once your ticket's validated). And as if that's not enough, while jumping, she saw me looking at her with probably an awkward expression on my face or perhaps just expressionless.

With that, I guess the self-defence reflexes within her body just suddenly burst out with chemicals and that quickly ran into her bloodstream which then activated her natural impulses to try and cover up her whole action. After those series of split second adrenaline, the only sentence I was able to comprehend coming out of her mouth was 'fu** of*!'

And that left me dumbfounded.

Moral of the story: Never ever turn to look at the person next to you even when you feel like you're dying to know what's going on. Instead, straight away ask, "How can I help you miss?" If you do that, please let me know what happens next. Thank you.

Tips for Surviving Medical School

2011-06-02T16:43:00.001+10:00

Remember when you were a premedical student in college? It seems like a century ago for many of us who have just completed the first year of medical school. It feels that way because our lives have changed dramatically. Normal life seems to have vanished, and suddenly, 24 hours in a day are not enough to get through the enormous volumes of information that we are expected to learn for every exam. It seems virtually impossible. We barely have time to eat or sleep.

Medical school is not the end of the world. Take it from us, 2 students who have been there, when we say that medical school is what you make of it. Do not let medicine define you; instead, you should tailor medicine to your lifestyle. Otherwise, you might become overwhelmed by the demands of your new life and lose the sense of why you chose medicine in the first place.

How do you survive medical school? From the beginning, time management must be a major priority. If you can manage your time successfully, you can still enjoy your life to a certain extent. Studying in med school is not the same as it was in college; this is a new world where you have to explore different techniques and find what works best for you. In medical school, it is all about studying smart, not studying hard. If you don't know this at the beginning, you will learn it the hard way.

Studying medicine is a long process and demands a great amount of discipline and sacrifice. But the reward is priceless. We hope that you chose medicine for the amazing field it is: the rich opportunities it provides for helping humans and the avenues it opens for making a difference in the world. The following are some of the most common pieces of advice we have collected:

Take care of yourself. You may face long-term negative consequences to your health if you adopt negative behaviors. Do not deprive yourself of healthy, fresh food. Do not ruin your health by eating fast food and avoiding exercise. Do not pull all-nighters and deprive your body and brain of sleep; the consequences are too severe for what may be only 15 minutes of productive studying. Your brain needs fresh food, water, fruits, and vegetables. Your body needs exercise and sleep.
Do not compete with your classmates or compare your grades with others. We all had to be competitive to get into medical school. But once you are accepted, it becomes a level playing field. Although many students still compete with their classmates, it will not make them better physicians. Getting a 95% on your pathology exam does not mean you will be a great pathologist or clinician. As soon as you walk out of your first exam, look around, and you will see people obsessing about what the right answer was for Question 13. It is easy to spot them. They will come to you and ask you if you put "C" for Question 84. Seriously! Avoid everyone after the exam, and make friends with those who share your philosophy.
Answer practice questions while you study. "Studying my notes 10 times is probably the best way to prepare for exams." Wrong! The only way to test your learning is to do practice questions. For example, after studying your Board Review Series physiology textbook, make sure you complete the questions at the end of each chapter. This will help solidify the concepts you just read. Studying the same thing repeatedly does not make you smarter, but getting a question wrong will teach you quite a bit. Professional educators will tell you that it is statistically proven that students who do more questions perform better on boards, and that the only time you should go back to the big books is when you consistently miss questions on a certain topic and the answer explanations are insufficient.
Learn the big picture. You will likely start your first day in school delving into biochemistry, anatomy, physiology, or histology. From the start, instructors talk about columnar cells, impulse transmission, and glycolysis in fine detail. The next day, you are learning about brachial plexus and cardiac output. This is an enormous amount of information overload and students are often not prepared. As you memorize, learn the big picture
Study with groups. "I am going to study on my own because I don't need anyone's help." Wrong! Medicine is all about teamwork and sharing information. You have to be able to cooperate with others. Even when you apply for residency, it is important to keep this concept in mind. The moment the residency directors feel you will not be a good team player or that you might have "issues" with your colleagues, your application goes in the shredder. Find a small group of people who share the same healthy habits as you, meaning they like to exercise, they do not like to discuss grades, and they have a positive attitude. Once you find the right group, arrange to meet weekly for several hours to ask each other questions about concepts you do not understand. Even better, ask each other questions on little details you think your friends might have understood. Arrange for a review session the night before the exam for last-minute tweaking of your knowledge.
Take time to engage in stress-relieving activities. Everyone in your class is facing the same amount of stress, some people more than others. You might notice some students walk around with a frown, whereas others wear huge smiles. How is that possible if they are all facing the same pressure? Again, it is time management. If you have extra time, you are able to reduce stress. Spend time with friends, or do something on your own that makes you feel better. Activities like exercise, yoga, listening to calm music, talking to your parents or praying -- there is something out there that makes you feel better. Find it and do it. Do not let the stress affect your studies, relationships and, most importantly, health.

Finally, and we cannot emphasize this enough, remember that we are joining a great profession. Be passionate about what you are learning! Medicine is a treasure and an art. As Henri Amiel said, "To me, the ideal doctor would be a man endowed with profound knowledge of life and of the soul, intuitively divining any suffering or disorder of whatever kind, and restoring peace by his mere presence."

Taken from medscape.com. Original article here: http://www.medscape.com/viewarticle/736773

Dakwah/Da'wah

2011-06-02T02:45:00.000+10:00

"With the name of Allah The Almighty, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful."

As the topic goes, my post this time will be on dakwah or da'wah as per Arabic spelling. What does that mean? It simply means calling to Islam or in a more elaborate explanation, educating, explaining through various means to our non-Muslims friends about our (Muslims) practices, beliefs and faith.

I cannot say I am worthy to perform such important responsibility, what's with my limited and inadequate knowledge on the matter at hand. But I believe what I have practised and carry out ever since I was born were right and that they were following the orders and words of the last messenger, our beloved Prophet Muhammad S.A.W.

It might not be entirely similar. Heck, it might be totally different. But that's why they say, Islam is the way of life. It transcends the trials and tribulations of time. Even after 1400 years after the first verse was read to the Prophet, Islam teaches the same values, the same practices, the same, 'way of life'. But never in any way, was it mentioned in the Quran how the values and practices are to be carried out. The only information provided is the guideline. And guidelines can be interpreted differently by different people.

An analogy; you see a non-smoking sign in a building. Many will interpret it as 'you're not allowed to smoke in the building'. That's what the general consensus would be. But did the sign wrote, no smoking in the building? Is it the whole building, even the balcony on the second floor, with very good airflow? The balcony is outside of the building, but its still part of it. You can smoke there, can't you?

There will also be some people who regardless of the sign, go against it or they created a thinking around it. Instead of interpreting it as no smoking in the building, they go with no smoking in the area where the sign is. So, technically, if they smoke in the toilet where there's no sign, or anywhere where the sign isn't put up, its not wrong is it?

The same goes with Islam. We were told to follow the Quran and the Hadith, in the Prophet's last message to his ummah before his last breath. By doing so, we will be saved, in the world and the hereafter. Still, Quran itself is not an easy scriptures to interpret. Reading the Quran isn't as simple as picking up any book where you read it once and you can understand it straight away. Even scholars sometime have difficulties to understand what exactly the verses in the Quran are trying to deliver.

That's why we have 4 different mazhabs. I'm not entirely sure how to explain the mazhabs, but to make it simple, the mazhabs are basically compilation of methods or ways of practicing Islam that has been proven to be the closest or the most similar to the practices during the time of the Prophet. Note my words, 'the closest', 'the most similar'. Its not exactly the same but nevertheless, the practices are all acceptable as they all follow the guideline as outlined in the Quran and Hadith.

Going back to the main topic, da'wah. I'm not in a position to say I can go up to people and educate them about Islam, not about anything beyond what I've learnt and practised. But if the non-Muslims inquire about things I believe I understood and have lived by it for the past 22 years, I am more than happy to explain, based on my own understanding. Yes, with references to proper evidence and examples.

One thing I always have to tell myself when explaining. Da'wah is not an easy thing. They will have plenty of questions, some of which I don't know the answer to. Some I might not even heard of before. Others might be very discriminative and biased that you felt like giving up or become angry. If you follow your heart, you'll get nothing. You'll end up arguing, but you reach nowhere.

Therefore, whenever I'm explaining about things, especially sensitive things like my faith, I told myself to be patient, listen and understand, explain carefully and properly, answer all their questions. Do not let them get to you. Cause once you do, you've lost. It's not just a matter of making them understand, but it's a matter of how much do we understand our own faith that we can explain it to others who have no prior knowledge whatsoever. It's a test for our own faith. Our Iman.

Remember this my fellow Muslim brothers and sisters. Whenever you're in trouble or having a huge problem, bear in mind, there is no trouble or problem, bigger than the passing of our beloved Prophet Muhammad S.A.W. For he was the last messenger of God.

Poem #5

2011-05-26T00:53:00.002+10:00

I hear, I hear,
The strings vibrating closely to my eardrum,
I hear, I hear,
The drum bouncing slowly against my chest.

These percussions are pulling me in,
I'm spiralling downwards to the ground,
It's music to the ears,
It's soothing to the heart,
It's absolute calmness to the body.

My skin trickles,
My head at ease,
I move to the beat,
I hum to the sound,
It's so light, It's refreshing.

I hear, I hear,
The strings vibrating closely to my eardrum,
I hear, I hear,
The drum bouncing slowly against my chest.

Can't wait for the next one!

The Burden

2011-05-25T00:09:00.000+10:00

Let me start this off with the phrase, "With the name of Allah The Almighty, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful".

I have always contemplated since the first time I was called upon to go onto the stage and answer the call of leadership. Reason being because I understood my limitations and how I'm unworthy of holding such position. But when thinking of all the new experiences, all the changes I'm able to do when I do become the person in charge, I stepped forward and took on the responsibility onto my shoulders.

It was not an easy decision.

Someone once told me, when you become the head, you've put in one foot beyond the gate of hellfire. Depending on how you lead the people under you, it may determine whether you will walk through the gate or the other way round.

Over the last few weeks, I've been listening to series of lectures by Anwar Al-Awlaki. The audio can be downloaded here: http://www.kalamullah.com. Of the most particular relevance to me (though all are actually relevant to me as a Muslim; this part is actually the part for the non-believers) is about the Day of Judgement, specifically the time during the arguments between the leader and the people. At that time, the people were saying, "Verily, we were following you (our leaders). Can you give us protection on the Day of Judgement? Had Allah guided us, we would have guided you. There is no place for us now, to seek refuge."

The speaker then proceeded to explain that those who spread truth to even one people, and that person spreads it to others and so forth, that person will receive the deeds of everyone who receives that truth and follow it. But those who spread even one falsehood to a person, and that person spreads it to others and so forth, that person would also carry that sin and those of others who committed the falsehood.

It scares me to imagine, what would happen if on that day, I was among the leaders and the phrases were directed to me. It even scares me more when I think of all the sins I'll get just by making one wrong decision as a leader.

And I'm currently at a point where I have to make a call which is clearly against the amar makruf nahi mungkar. At times like this, I can feel the burden heavily pushing down on my body. It has pushed me to the extent that I can't think of any other solution. I want to remain with my stand, but there is no other option.

Given the situation, I might in the end make that call and go with it, even when I fully understood the consequences. But I pray to Him that it will not come to that. There's still time, and as much as I know it is nearly impossible, I'm still clinging to that small grain of hope that eventually things will turn out alright. I'm still holding on to my faith that in the end everything will go as planned, done in the proper way and manner.

"They have all put in so much efforts. And now I'm praying that You will show us guidance. In the end, You are The All-Knowing, The Almighty. We can make plans, but you know what's best for us."

Hari Guru

2011-05-17T19:11:00.000+10:00

SELAMAT HARI GURU, CHEK GU!!

Back in the day, every time 16th of May comes and it falls on school days, surely there are people who give presents to their teachers. From primary to secondary school, it grew into some sort of business and a creative bunch of students start a service to give presents to your favourite teacher anonymously on Teacher's Day.

After you finish high school, all the excitement disappears abruptly. But the spirit lives on. We are and will always be grateful for what our teachers taught us. Teachers who showed us the way to walk properly. Teachers who tirelessly correct our mistakes and remind us to be a good person. Teachers who stick with us through thick and thin. And because we have all these great teachers, we are who we are today.

I can't thank enough to all those who've helped me through this course of life. From my early kindergarten teachers at Assunta and Tabika Kemas, my primary school teachers at SK St. Thomas and SKBF, my secondary school teachers at SMART and MCKK to my tertiery level teachers at INTEC and finally Monash University. Not to forget everyone else in between who tutored me, scolded, nagged and pulas perut to make me learn my mistakes and not to repeat them. By teachers, I refer to everyone who in any way have guided me in my life learning process.

May The Almighty bless you amazing people and may you continue to do wonders with your lessons.