Frugal Zeitgeist

Oops, guess I should put a title in

2011-07-07T11:30:00.003-05:00

Yikes. It's July. How's your summer going so far? I've had some ups and downs over the past six weeks or thereabouts. In no particular order, here they are:

Family
I came out West for a planned working visit a few days ago. The day after I arrived, my mom's ability to function took a dramatic turn for the worse. She has Parkinson's and recently shifted from cane to walker, but overnight she suddenly became completely unable to walk or stand on her own. Sibling and I took her to the emergency room once it became clear that this wasn't going away, and we were glad to find out that there were no signs of another stroke. Mom did have a bad bladder infection, though, and unless the neurologist turns up something else today when he examines her, there's a strong probability that the bladder infection is the root cause of Mom's overnight loss of function. She's been doing better since going on antibiotics, and she reluctantly agreed to move to assisted living on what is hopefully a temporary basis. In the meantime, I'm working from 4:00 a.m. until early afternoon, spending the rest of the day with her, and then catching up in the evening. My sibling will be able to stay her longer due to a planned extended vacation/leave of absence from work, so I'll most likely be returning to New York this weekend even though Mom's not likely to be released from assisted living for some time.

Job
And why is it so important for me to get back to New York? We're going through another reorg at work, so I need to be visible even though there are no plans for layoffs in the works as far as I can tell. After nearly two years of constant reorganization, however, I'm pretty burned out and ready to accept whatever happens.

Relationship
A couple of months in, things are pretty good with the Aussie so far. We survived the first idiotic fight, and we're learning to catch cultural things that impede communication fairly quickly. One potential issue I see looming on the horizon is that we are very, very different when it comes to money. I'm not sure I'd call it a red flag at the moment, but its something to keep in mind if things start heading in a more serious direction. To put it succinctly, he makes a lot, but he also spends a lot. You know that's really not how I roll.

The more immediate challenge is that he's has had a steady stream of family visiting over the past few weeks, and although I've been invited to lots of things with them, the limited time to talk and spend time one on one has made things a little harder. I started feeling a rift that probably isn't actually there, and I think it's both because of the lack of time together and because while he's swamped with family obligations, my mom's problems are taking a heavy toll on me and affecting how I'm perceiving everything at the moment. We'll see what getting back to normal living brings.

Health
Ran the Boston Marathon in April; I requalified for 2012, but wasn't happy with my time. I signed up for a second marathon only six weeks later, and in that one I ran a personal best of just over 3:30. I promptly got sick with a respiratory infection right before an out of state relay in June, which made that run all kinds of interesting. I'm over it, but still coughing (thanks, asthma!). I also gained a few pounds, and the knee problem that has been hanging around for the past year and a half has become much more acute. I'm supposedly doing a marathon in early October, but my mileage and fitness level have both dropped precipitously. I'm still planning on doing it but not expecting any miracles, especially with knee problems, lack of training, and the fact that this will be my fourth marathon in twelve months.

Money
Haven't been saving as much as usual. Part of that is because of the unexpected expenses I wrote about in my last post (a $6000 "loan" [really a gift] to my New York parents and well over $2000 on a new washer and dryer), but I've also been traveling a lot (six trips since January, five of which involved airline tickets). Spending time with the Aussie has also meant much more eating out than I'm used to, but he's one of those guys who strongly prefers to pick up the check. There is a very big difference in our incomes, but it's still very hard for me to let someone else pay all the time when we go out. I do grab the check on occasion (never in front of his friends), but I can tell that he's not particularly thrilled about it. In any case, while going out for dinner frequently has been decidedly bad for my waistline, it hasn't had a lot of impact on my bottom line. Travel and the unexpected expenses I described are by far the primary culprits.

That sounds a lot more Debbie Downer-ish than I meant it to. I'm actually fairly optimistic that my mom will recover enough to be able to resume independent living, though I don't think it'll happen as soon as she expects it to. As for the rest of it, the big picture is that I don't have a lot worth expending energy worrying on, so I'm doing my best to focus on the important things and let go of the rest.

What's going on with you right now?

Well, hi there

2011-05-25T18:07:00.003-05:00

It's been a while, so I thought I'd drop in again and give you the highlights about some things that have happened recently.

First, I took two reasonably significant financial hits. Remember my New York Mom and New York Dad? They're an older couple I rented a room from as a grad student, and I secretly bailed New York Mom out some years ago with a few hundred dollars when she overspent. (This couple has never been able to manage money.) New York Mom also had a major, major health crisis and nearly died a couple of years ago, so I pitched in with a lot of logistical and emotional support during that time.

Well, I got a call from New York Mom and New York Dad a number of weeks ago. They asked if they could borrow some money because of a cash flow problem. They inherited an apartment from a friend they cared for when she was ill for a number of years, and it's been on the market without selling for quite some time. They never changed the way they spend, and I think they also made some sort-of investment decisions with property in Florida that are inappropriate for how they live and how much money they have. They hit the wall and ran out of cash, and from what it sounds like, they were about to lose property as a result.

I asked how much they needed, and New York Dad said "Ten thousand. . . maybe twelve thousand?"

In other words, they had no idea what they need.

I needed 24 hours to think about this and talk it over with my sibling, who is really good in these situations. In the end, I decided the following:

1. I offered $6000.
2. It's a gift, not a loan.
3. This is a one-time deal and it never happens again.

They accepted and insist that they'll pay me back, but I know it won't happen. I'm actually fine with it; the only thing I find slightly galling is knowing that some of it will go to support their slackass daughter (Grifter), who still has no real interest in getting a job even though she's getting divorced, since it's a lot more fun to be a mommy.

(By the way, what does it say that this nice couple came to me for money and not their own two adult children??)

I know I'll probably be pilloried for doing this, but there have been times in my life when people have helped me out, i.e. my parents giving me the boost I needed to pass my co-op board financials when I bought my apartment. I have enough to help them, and my gut is telling me it's the right thing to do. We'll see if that's how it really plays out.

The other financial hit I took is that my washing machine finally died, and in a most dramatic fashion: It flooded my bedroom as well as the basement. I was extraordinarily lucky that there was no permanent damage to the electrical panels in the elevators, as that would have been my responsibility to fix. I stayed up late researching compact washers and dryers (since the dryer is 27 years old), and the next morning I sailed out to a store in the neighborhood and bought Bosch replacements. There's not a huge market for compact units and these have the best consumer reviews, much better than the Maytag, LG, and Whirlpool equivalents I looked at. The two machines plus taxes, installation, new outlet (Bosch hates US outlets), unexpected extra costs based on the old dryer not being up to code (!), and removal of the old units came to $2360. Ouch.

I tapped my emergency fund for both of these major expenses, so there was no question of either racking up debt or liquidating investments. It means I've had to divert new money into rebuilding my emergency fund, but the fact that I had the money is peace of mind like no other.

And finally, the third major event: I met someone. For some reason, I have (ok, the right word is probably had) a lot of readers from Australia; I hope you folks in particular will be pleased to hear that he's Australian. He came here a few months ago on an expat assignment with a one-year visa that's renewable indefinitely. It's early days yet, but so far it's been fantastic. That's about all I want to say about him for now, but the spark is definitely there, and it's there in a really big way.

If anyone's still reading, I hope all is well and that your own personal economic recovery has legs. Back again when there's something else to report.

Here but also sort of gone

2011-04-03T13:09:00.003-05:00

Hi. How have you been?

Looks like I haven't posted since 16 January. I don't really have an explanation for that other than that I just ran completely out of steam.

The time away has been nice. Sorry, but it has.

In no particular order, here's some of what I've done over the last eleven weeks of radio silence:

--Turned 42
--Broke a rib
--Made a really good new friend
--Deepened a couple of other budding friendships
--Visited my mom out West
--Signed up for a 200-mile relay in Utah this summer
--Saw live music
--Went to a lot of neat places I've never been, including an absinthe bar
--Started going out with friends much, much more
--Maintained my lower weight/smaller size
--Learned to bake the very challenging French macarons
--Continued shopping unrepentantly for smaller clothes (I spent a crapload of money on things that look great and fit beautifully, and I don't regret it one bit.)
--Bought a load of moderately priced and very beautiful craft jewelry from independent artists
--Finished heavy training for the Boston Marathon
--Worked up to 100 push-ups a day, split into two sets of fifty
--Started dating online (and oh my, is THAT ever a freak show at my age!)
--Got my job reclassified as a much bigger position with more responsibility (no extra money, though)
--Arrived within striking distance of my unofficial end of 2011 net worth goal

Things I did not do over the past eleven weeks:

--Blog
--Check email for this account
--Read any blogs other than two or three I've followed for a long time
--Set any goals whatsoever other than maintaining my weight loss and saving $65,000 this year

My unofficial end of 2011 net worth goal is unofficial because it depends less on my own diligence in savings than it does on a robust stock market. Thanks to the market recovery, however, I'm close to hitting a major milestone early: Savings and investments plus the estimated value of my home add up to just shy of a million dollars.

Some people count equity as part of net worth, and some don't. I don't, so I don't count myself as someone approaching millionairedom. If all goes well, that'll happen in the next several years. For now, though, my perspective is that things aren't as hard as they used to be.

I don't know when or if I'll feel like coming back to the way this blog was before, but I'll check in from time to time. When I hit a milestone, I'll definitely post it. For now, however, I've got an avalanche of work coming down on me, a very full social calendar, and a marathon in two weeks.

Anything neat going on in your life that you want to share?

Food for thought

2011-01-16T15:37:00.007-05:00

After I posted my weight loss photos, a commenter asked me to write a post about what I eat. The answer is pretty simple and probably pretty boring: Mostly whole foods that I cook myself. I've found through trial and error and error and error over the years that I'm very sensitive to sugar and other simple carbs, and that they cause my blood sugar to whipsaw all over the place. I simply function better on a moderately low-carb eating plan.

There's a little more background to my eating habits that I should explain. Because my mom experienced dangerously high cholesterol in the late 1980's, my entire family adopted what was then called the New American Diet plan and eliminated egg yolks, oils and fats, and any kind of meat other than poultry and fish (and I rarely eat fish myself). In grad school, I was too broke to afford chicken or turkey on a regular basis, so I started following Dean Ornish's vegetarian plan. This turned out to be a mistake, as I was hungry all the time and became severely anemic. After a year and a half of mostly miserable struggling and weight fluctuation, I went back, more or less, to the still carb-rich New American Diet plan.

You know, that one just never worked for me that well, either. I'm sure there are a lot of people out there who function great on high carb intake, but I'm not one of them.

After coming to the conclusion a few years ago that I feel better with more protein and fat in my diet, I relaxed my categories of food intake considerably. I like eggs, nuts, and avocados, so I eat them in moderation. (Unlike the Dean Ornish days, there's medical evidence to suggest that the heart-healthy benefits of these kinds of fats overwhelmingly outweigh any dangers.) I like lean ham and the occasional slice of bacon, although I only cook the turkey kind. I've never cooked red meat, but I'll eat it at someone's house. Similarly, although I only ever ate whole grain bread, I've cut my bread intake way down. I used to bake bread every week and I love the taste of it, but I have a good friend who convinced me that I have an undiagnosed food allergy to something in it, because more than a couple of slices per day makes me puffy all over for several days. Since cutting way back on bread, I can't deny that I'm much less puffy all the time.

My real food bugaboo, however, is sweets. I gave up sweets for a full year in 2009, and it was one of the hardest things I've ever done. The first time I had refined sugar after that, it was like I had never stopped. I've found, however, that the cravings are manageable with a higher protein intake (and if I don't indulge, they drop to non-existent within a day or two) unless I have PMS. PMS results in much worse sugar cravings and usually one to two bad days of indulgence, so the only answer for that is to make it as difficult as possible to give into them by not keeping any sweets at home.

So, back to what I eat. Here's a typical day for me:

Breakfast: 1/2 cup of old-fashioned oatmeal (which *can* be cooked in the microwave) with either 1 cup of blueberries or 1/2 cup of pomegranate seeds

Snack: One hard-boiled egg with salt

Snack: One peanut butter sandwich on whole grain bread, using one tablespoon of peanut butter. (This is my entire bread consumption for the day.)

Lunch: Four to five ounces of grilled chicken (or ham, or one chicken sausage, or several small turkey meatballs - whatever adds up to about 200 calories), with raw carrot sticks and raw red, green, orange, or yellow bell pepper - preferably a mix since the colors are so appealing

Snack: One large apple, or three clementines, or one banana, or one other similarly-sized portion of in-season fruit

Snack: 1/4 cup of almonds, pecans, walnuts, or mixed nuts. (I try to skip this one, but I always have it with me at work in case I need it.)

Dinner: It varies, but usually something like spicy vegetarian or chicken chili, pot pie, whole wheat pasta with green vegetables and sauce, turkey burgers and vegetables, turkey meat loaf and vegetables, or something else that I've cooked and frozen in advance so I can just grab it out of the freezer the morning I need it.

When I was losing weight, I stuck to 1500-1700 calories per day, bumping it up to 2500 once every week and a half to two weeks to accommodate dinners out with friends, bad PMS days, or days when I was just absolutely starving for no apparent reason. I also worked out a LOT, primarily running and weightlifting (thank you to the commenter who mentioned my arms, by the way. I was so gratified to see my guns come back so quickly!), with a little yoga thrown in when I had time.

Since then, nothing has changed other than the fact that I'm eating around 2000 to 2400 calories most days. Some days I go overboard, especially since I've been eating more sweets than I should over the past couple of weeks. (More on that in my next post.) When that happens, I usually pull back the next day to balance out my intake. My weight has been hovering between 138 and 142 but I'm spending more time at 142 than I'd like, so I'm actually going back to lower calories for the next couple of weeks to bring my average down to my original target, 140.

That's my food life. There are some other things I did to lose weight that made a major impact on my progress, and those are worth sharing as well. They were:

Stop hitting the candy bowls at work
There are many of them, and they are always full. When I start indulging, I can't stop. One of my best friends at work is a guy who perennially has ten pounds to lose, so we made a deal: No candy at work for either of us, and we each get to keep the other person honest. Believe it or not, it worked and is continuing to work.

Stop hitting the vending machine at work
I got into the habit of grabbing a 3:00 snack when I got tired, and it was always something nasty like chips or a candy bar. Like the candy bowl situation, I had to go cold turkey. I started bringing a hard-boiled egg to work every day and eating it relatively early, and my blood sugar and energy levels are much more stable now than they were before I started doing that.

Bring lunch to work every day
I've done this my whole adult life anyway. It's something I started because eating out is expensive and not that healthy relative to what I can make myself, so this was no hardship. Bringing breakfast and lunch from home and cooking dinner at home most of the time are healthy (the way I do it, anyway) and save a ton of money, both of which are so very good for my frugal heart.

Plan
I plan my food intake (including calories) in a spreadsheet one day in advance. Sometimes I need to make adjustments, but seeing the big picture helps me know where I have room to modify. Doing this even though I'm not officially losing weight anymore helps keep me on track.

Weigh in daily
I weigh myself every day, and I graph the results. It's a crazy-ass line, sometimes shooting up or down four pounds in a day. Seeing the fluctuations helps me not get discouraged because I know it'll change a day or two later. Several days of sustained increase also serve as an early-warning system, telling me that I need to pull back for a few days or risk gaining again.

It was hard to acknowledge that exercise alone wasn't enough to keep my weight where it should be, but for me weight maintenance falls into the realm of Failing to plan is planning to fail. I'm really enjoying looking and feeling better all the time, and it's not something I want to let go south again. Just for fun, here's a shot of where I am today, featuring really awful hair and a dress I bought on clearance for $34 to wear at an upcoming formal event:

What tips and techniques do you rely on to manage your weight?

Update

2011-01-09T21:47:00.002-05:00

You know that January goals post I usually put together? Haven't done it yet. Still thinking about what I really want my goals to be as opposed to what I feel they should be. I think that's part of why they fell apart last year, aside from the major unexpected events that happened.

In other news, we have a stopgap solution of sorts cobbled together for my mom. Thank you so very, very much to everyone who responded with suggestions and concern. While I was out West, we got a booster for the toilet seat and had platforms built to go under the sofa and recliner so that my mom can get up more easily. I was so embarrassed: The workmen who custom-built the platforms refused to accept a cent of payment for either labor or materials. All we could do was send a thank-you card to their place of employment, and we did that right away.

We also worked very hard on the other piece of the puzzle, buy-in from my mom on making changes to help maintain independence. To that end, we got her to use a walker inside the house (which is a townhouse in a retirement community) instead of a cane when she's unsteady. She was in the habit of asking my sibling and I for an arm when her balance was off because she hated the walker, but we decided that instead of lending her an arm, we would bring her the walker instead. She didn't like that at first, but after realizing how much easier it is to get around, especially when she's alone, she got on board with the idea. She still won't use the walker outside the house, which is when she needs it the most, but we're working on it.

Similarly, we got my mom to wear the support stockings she's supposed to be wearing to keep her ankles from swelling, and the improvement was drastic. She doesn't like them, but she grudgingly acknowledges that they make a huge difference in lessening her ankle swelling, so she's putting them on most days even though it's a struggle. We also got her in the habit of putting her feet up in the recliner, although I'm not sure whether she's still doing that consistently or not.

Finally, my mom is supposed to be doing strengthening exercises for mobility, and she hadn't been doing them for quite a while. We got her in the habit of doing them while we were there by doing them with her, and now we follow up with her daily to make sure she still does them. She hates them because she feels they're too elementary, but they are appropriate given her age and physical condition.

Things we haven't succeeded in getting my mom to adopt thus far include Kegel exercises for bladder strengthening (she has no interest in these at all, despite her bladder weakness - which she's determined to ignore altogether at the moment), and an alert necklace in case she needs assistance and can't get to the phone. Since my mom had a couple of weeks of not having to use the phone to call either me or my sibling, she's suddenly having much more difficulty using it. As a result, we're hoping to get her to bend on the necklace next weekend.

It's not a great situation, but it's better - for now. I'm crossing my fingers and hoping nothing bad happens.

Going back to the goals part for just a second: Any suggestions from you on what goals I should have for 2011? I have a few in mind, but I'd like to hear what you think I should aim for. Thanks a bunch in advance.

So long, 2010

2011-01-01T22:18:00.005-05:00

2010 wasn't the greatest of years by a long shot, but it wasn't the worst it could have been, either. Since my goals for 2010 stopped being relevant a long time ago, I'll just do a quick summary of the major events that made up my 2010 story:

Highlights
Saving
The one goal from 2010 that remained relevant all the way through was my savings goal of $63,000 in total. I managed to exceed this one, finishing out the year at $67,000. This includes my 401(k) and IRA contributions, as well as taxable investing. I probably could have come close to $70,000 had I not done some major crazypants, self-indulgent personal spending in November and December, but I'm really pleased to have beaten my target.

Net worth
Thanks to nearly 20% return in most of my investments this year, I achieved my secret net worth target of half a million dollars excluding real estate in November. A buoyant last six weeks in the stock market added just shy of of $25,000 to that figure, which is a great way to start my 2011 financial goals. I also felt confident enough to up my charitable giving and move some of my three years of cash reserves into bond funds. I still have fourteen months' worth of expenses stashed away in cash just in case, though.

Fitness
I gained twelve pounds relatively early in the year, but I managed to lose it by the end of December. I know I'm up a little bit at the moment after overindulging this past week, so it's time to get back on the wagon and stay there.

Work
I still have a job, and after foregoing raises due to the economy last year, this year it came with a 4.5% raise.

2011 Boston Marathon entry
Despite a disappointing fall marathon, my qualification from 2009 is still good. The Boston Marathon sold out in a record eight hours this year, so I feel pretty darn fortunate to have gotten my entry in.

2010 wasn't all good. Here's where things didn't go so well:

Lowlights
My mom's stroke
I really can't articulate how bad this was. She was lucky that it happened when and where it did, because she had the best possible shot at full recovery. While it looked like she did achieve full recovery early on, over time it became obvious that there is some permanent impairment. Add that to her existing health problems, and you have a situation where she is rapidly declining and not willing to make many changes to accommodate the new normal. (I'll cover this topic in a little more depth in a follow-up post.) She reminds me of my dad at the beginning of his last decline, and it's scary. All I can do is continue to do the best I can for her and hope it'll be enough.

Relationship tanked
I actually had to debate about whether this belongs in the highlight category or the lowlight one. It's a highlight in the sense that ending it was the right thing to do, and my friends were amazingly gentle and supportive when I needed it most. I don't think the ebbing of love and final extinction is anything other than a lowlight, though, so here it is.

Crappy marathon
It wasn't the race I trained for, but the photographic evidence sure shocked me into making some positive changes. I'm looking to redeem myself in Boston this year.

Blogging
I mentioned a while ago that I want to take this blog in new directions, but I'm stalled on a plan. I also seem to have less and less time to write these days, to the point where I feel out of balance. I have a feeling that this is going to end up in my (late) 2011 goals somehow, but I haven't quite figured out how to make that happen.

On the whole, there was much more that was good about 2010 than not. I don't know what to expect for 2011, but I believe in creating our own luck. Let's make it a good one.

What were your highlights and lowlights for 2010?

45 days later

2010-12-22T21:30:00.004-05:00

Six weeks and three days after the shock of seeing my fall marathon photos, yesterday I hit and slightly surpassed my goal weight. Here's what 139.6 pounds of f.z. looks like:

Sorry about the crappy lighting. Hopefully, you can see the beginnings of my baby six-pack.

That's a US size six you're looking at, which translates to 28.25 inches (a 2.75 inch drop) around the waist. I feel So. Much. Better.

That's the good news. The bad? Well, I'm at my mom's place on the West Coast, and I can't say it's been a good visit so far. My mom's physical abilities have deteriorated alarmingly just in the past couple of weeks. Two nights ago, she woke me up at 2:00 in the morning after spending an hour unable to get up and go to the bathroom. I couldn't get her up: I like to think I'm stronger than the average forty-something woman, but I can't lift my 165-pound mom. After another hour of struggling and an unfortunate bathroom accident, I had to call paramedics in to get my mom standing. I was done sleeping (I had all of three hours), but I had a full day of work to put in after that.

One incident like that would be bad enough, but this morning we did it all over again. After my mom woke me up calling for help because she couldn't stand, I lost an hour and a half begging and pleading with her to let me phone for help. I finally gave her the phone and left the room because I couldn't handle it any more. Half an hour later, she picked up the phone and asked for help herself.

My mom needs assisted living; that's obvious. She totally refuses.

I think it's safe to say that my mom's judgment as far as her own safety and independence are concerned is horrible. At the same time, she's an adult with rights and a very strong will, and I need to respect the decisions she makes for her own life.

To say that this situation is frustrating is an understatement in the extreme. I'm trying my damndest to respect her wishes and decisions, and I'm also trying not to shield her too much from the consequences of bad decision-making. At the same time, however, it's not my mom cleaning urine off the carpet. It's me. More importantly, if this is what's happening while I'm here, what the heck is going to happen when I leave next week?

I don't know what to do here, folks. I'd welcome your suggestions.

If I hadn't gotten the religion back about general fitness and especially weight lifting, by the way, the last few days certainly would have done it. While a large part of my mom's problems stem both from the stroke and from a neurological disorder (think Michael J Fox) that I have no reason to believe is hereditary, the fact that she suddenly doesn't have the strength to reliably lift herself out of a sitting position is huge motivation to me to get stronger and stay that way.

Have you had any special challenges to face with aging parents? What happened and how did you handle it?

Violation

2010-12-11T23:10:00.004-05:00

Two more pounds gone, which makes nine total. Just in the last couple of days, my missing cheekbones have returned. Today, I saw a total of nine different people I know, and every single person noticed the weight loss and said that it's very apparent in my face. Three pounds to go!

I planned to write something else completely, but today the System Tool virus attacked my computer and had its way with it. This is a new or newish virus, and it's extremely nasty. At the very least, it self-replicates and tries to fool infected users into giving up their credit card numbers for fake anti-virus software. In my case, it not only self-replicated and tried to sell me stuff, but also knocked out my internet connection and stopped all programs from running. Norton Anti-Virus doesn't have a patch for it, and I spent an hour and a half on the phone waiting for a technician.

Technical support, by the way, cost me a hundred bucks. OUCH.

I talked to a few friends while my computer was being scrubbed, and it sounds like quite a few people have been hit. The general consensus was that a system restoration back to several days ago will fix the problem. I asked the virus technician about that approach and he responded that it gets rid of the symptoms, but doesn't remove the virus from the system.

Since I use my computer to log into and manage a variety of financial accounts, I decided that professional scrubbing was an expensive but worthwhile remedy. After two hours eradicating the virus from multiple locations on my computer, the technician left me a list of tips for avoiding this and other viruses in future. Since this list cost me $100, I'm happy to share it with you for free:

Steps to keep computer free from Virus:

1. Never open attachments from unknown sources or attachments you are not expecting. (Knew that)

2. Always scan diskettes, CD's and any other removable media before using them. (Knew that too)

3.Do not click on any pop-ups, just click on "Alt Key" and "F4".... (This is helpful! Even mousing over or clicking on the x in a pop-up can cause a trojan to start downloading. Apparently, that's how most people are getting it)

4.Do not visit any unsecured websites. (I asked for clarification on this one. You can go to http://safeweb.norton.com to check for the presence of viruses on a site. Keep in mind that there is no patch for the System Tool virus yet, though)

5.Ensure that your virus Definitions are updated. (If this isn't automated on your computer, it should be)

6. Keep your system up to date with Microsoft Windows Update to protect your system from viruses and worms that attack known Windows security vulnerabilities. (Newer Windows operating systems will do the update automatically. I don't know what Macs do)

Has your PC been infected with a virus? What did you get and how did you get rid of it? What damage (if any) did it cause?

Stay safe out there, folks.

Spending hangover

2010-12-03T12:15:00.004-05:00

Seven pounds down, and my skinny pants fit. Yay me.

With five pounds left to lose, I'm starting to think that I might actually be back to normal by the end of the year. Should I post a photo when I get there?

In my last post, I mentioned that I've been spending a LOT of money in the past few weeks. Part of this is related to normal end of year expenses: I finished off my planned giving for the year, so my credit card took a big hit for that. Also, it's doorman tip season and that always costs around $400. Finally, I normally buy a year's worth of running shoes once my favorite shoe's new model is released and the old one goes on sale, so that's another $390 that went out the window.

In addition to the normal planned spending, though, this year I budgeted for some additional spending that is and was completely self-indulgent. In the past few weeks, here's where that money has gone:

--New dresses (a few for work, a few not for work): $650 (after 30% discount)
--New dishes (eight place settings, plus serving bowls and a large platter): $135 (after 25% sale and 15% discount on top of that, plus free shipping)
--Two turtlenecks, to replace old, stretched-out ones: $60 (after 40% discount)
--Two cardigans, to replace five very old ones: $80 (after 30% discount)
--One pair of jeans in my normal (slimmer) size: $50 (Full price! I have a very hard time finding jeans that are short enough, flattering, and don't expose my buttcrack. Getting all that and a sale on top of it is nearly impossible.)

I bought everything online and am still waiting for the last three things to arrive, by the way. If they don't work, back they go.

And finally. . .

--I dropped $539 on cast-iron Le Creuset cookware. I ended up with a white nine-quart dutch oven for $240 (I don't love the white, but it was $60 cheaper than anywhere else I saw), plus a set of three items in the flame color: A 1.25 quart saucepan, a 5.5 quart dutch oven, and a 10-inch skillet. That set was $299.

I finally cracked on the cookware when I took out my nasty, seventeen-year-old non-stick pots that are all scratched up, started to get them ready for use, and then decided that after months of figuring out what I wanted and researching prices, I had finally had enough and wasn't going to do any better than the last, best sale I found.

I love the cookware, and I don't regret it one bit. There are still two more pieces I want to buy, but I haven't found them at the right price points yet. I'm in no real rush anyway since I have the basics.

I don't regret any of the other purchases either. I sure didn't need most or even any of what I bought, but none of it was impulse shopping, and I took the time to compare prices and plan. I didn't want any residual guilt, so I also waited to do any shopping until I surpassed my savings goal for the year. (More on that on the quarterly recap in a few weeks.)

All the spending has been fun, but it left me actually feeling a little hung over at the end. I'm not sure that hung over is the right term, although I can't think of a better one. It's more like how I feel after overdoing it on pancakes: Stuffed, blood sugar off the rails from all the white flour and sugar, a little queasy, and not interested in seeing another pancake for a very long time. My credit card should close for the month tomorrow, and I can't wait to wipe out the balance and get back to normal.

There's one other thing that caused me to take a break from focusing on saving for the moment, by the way. I've never published my net worth here before, but I do have very specific net worth goals as well as savings goals for every year. Since the net worth goals depend on market fluctuations, they're not under my control except via my ongoing asset allocation strategy; as a result, I think focusing on maintaining the strategy and achieving my savings goals is more productive than obsessing over what the market does day to day.

With all that said, I've come very close to hitting my 2010 net worth goal several times recently, but I finally did it this week. Not counting the value of my home, I finally topped half a million dollars in savings and investments. That represents many years of hard work and dedicated saving. To me, it was worthy of a little celebration.

Have you done any spending just for yourself this holiday season thus far? If not, why not? If so, what did you buy and why? Did you end up feeling hung over afterwards?

Stronger

2010-11-26T21:03:00.003-05:00

I hope everyone in the US had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I had two invitations this year and somehow managed to get to both places, which made me feel very loved indeed despite not having any family here in New York.

You may have noticed that things have been pretty quiet around here lately. I mentioned that I've been wading through an avalanche of catch-up from being in Italy for a week, but something else happened a few weeks ago that's taken my attention elsewhere.

Most major marathons have professional photographers on the course, and the race I did in early October was no exception. I received an email a few weeks ago to look at proofs of the photos, so I duly clicked the link and saw the glory that awaited.

It was horrifying.

I mentioned a while ago that I put about ten pounds on earlier this year, mostly following my mom's stroke and hospitalization. I haven't been able to shake it off, but I also haven't really tried. Marathon photos are seldom flattering at the best of times and this year it rained during the entire race, so I was expecting to see myself looking bedraggled.

I wasn't expecting to look so, well. . .

Fat.

Yeah.

To put things in perspective, I realize that my body image is skewed. This is pretty common among distance runners: When you can feel every additional pound slowing you down, an extra five or ten pounds can take on the histrionic feel of a Greek tragedy. I'm short with a large, muscular frame, and I learned a long time ago that a healthy, generally maintainable weight for me is about 140 pounds. That puts me into a size 4-8 depending on the manufacturer, settling in at about size 6 on average. Lately, I've been dragging out my largest 8's and even a few 10's that I kept in the back of the closet, but it took seeing my marathon pictures to internalize the fact that I either need to embrace my larger size or do something about it.

That was my come-to-Jeebus moment.

I was a grad school project for a nutritionist friend five or six years ago, so I pulled out all the tools she gave me for managing caloric intake and started using them again.

After two years of convincing myself that yoga is better than weightlifting, I went back to the weight room.

Since Boston Marathon training season is just around the corner, I ramped up my base running mileage to about forty per week.

At the end of the first week of targeted running, lifting, and more sensible eating, I pulled out the tape measure, hopped on the scale, and recorded the full extent of the damage: 152 pounds, meaning twelve pounds and two extra inches on my waist to lose.

Three weeks after finally getting on the scale, I'm sticking to between 1500 and 1700 calories most days. In addition to running, I'm also doing a full-body weightlifting session twice a week. I was shocked by how my strength has declined after two years away from throwing the iron around, but I'm very gratified by how quickly it's coming back: I've gone from one full push-up at a shot to thirty; from zero unassisted dips on parallel bars to three sets of eight; from lunges with an empty 45-pound bar to 125 pounds; and from bench pressing with fifteen-pound dumbbells to an 85-pound barbell (and a few at 95 with a spotter).

It's paying off. I've dropped five pounds in three weeks, and the definition in my arms, shoulders, and back is coming back. I also bought several very form-fitting dresses online. Seeing how nice they look as my stomach has flattened out is incredibly motivating.

I expected the hardest part to be cutting back on sugar, but that's actually been the easiest. Recording my caloric intake probably has a lot to do with that, given how high in calories most sugary foods are. I've noticed, however, that once I get started with anything sugary (like the pumpkin cheesecake that turned up at Thanksgiving dinner #2 last night), it's awfully hard to stop at just a little. As a result, I've been planning for the occasions where I know there will be dessert by cutting way back on calories earlier in the day. The rest of the time, not having any is much easier than having just a little, so that's the approach I'm taking.

I feel better. So, so much better already.

I should add that I'm in no way passing judgment on ANYONE who is heavy. If the rest of my family is any indication, we are genetically predisposed to put on weight. My experience over the years certainly bears that out: Managing my weight takes effort. When I take my eye off the ball, I gain. Aside from being concerned about the raw numbers on the scale, with cancer, strokes, and heart disease in both of my parents and all of their siblings (not to mention the two quirky autoimmune disorders I already have), I am highly motivated to keep my risk factors to a minimum.

Ultimately, it really comes down to how I feel. I am an endorphin junkie. I credit exercise-induced endorphins for helping me keep a sunny, optimistic outlook towards life most of the time. Regardless of the cause, the darkest periods of my life emotionally have always been those in which I exercise the least. Without maintaining a certain base fitness level, I think I'd spend far too much time off of my emotional equilibrium.

(While I've been getting my physical well-being back on track, I've also been engaging in some completely indulgent planned spending. I'll go into that in my next post.)

For me, fitness and being at a healthy weight are tied closely to my overall sense of well-being. Where does your sense of well-being lie, and what do you do to reinforce it?

A different perspective on money

2010-11-21T13:50:00.005-05:00

Over the past few months, I've gotten to be close friends with a neighbor I knew only in passing for years. She's a single mom who lives upstairs from me. We talked about money recently, and my neighbor had an interesting perspective: She told me that saving every penny is the stupidest thing anyone can do, and that it's important to enjoy life today in every way possible. She went on to tell me that she should be saving for her two young kids' educations right now, but that if paying for college is unaffordable, the kids are dual citizens and can always go back to my neighbor's home country in Europe and get educated for free.

My neighbor has a good income (much higher than mine, I suspect), but still, she's a single mom in New York. Raising two kids on her own can't be easy.

Is she irresponsible?

A couple of years ago, I would have said absolutely. In this situation, however, there's a twist: My neighbor's husband developed a rare and extremely nasty form of cancer three years ago. Despite throwing every possible treatment at it, he died less than twelve months later at the age of 39. My friend is now doing her best to be both mom and dad to two kids who aren't old enough to remember a whole lot about their dad, but are old enough to still miss him terribly. A large part of her is still very angry with (pick your favorite: God/the universe/forces of nature/random, chaotic events and consequences/whatever you want to call it) that her husband was taken away, but she's started making new friends and dating in order to move on with her life. For her, part of moving on means living almost wholly in the moment.

As some of you know or might have guessed, my historical tendency for most of my adult life is to fall too far to the opposite end of the spectrum, where I'm so focused on the future that I forget about living in the present. That's something I've been trying to change over time after paying off my mortgage and more recently, as my investments have gradually gone back into the black, but I've never had a defining moment that triggered a major change in my perspectives on money. Unless that happens (and to be honest, I'd really rather not go through something like that), I suspect that living more in the present will continue to be something I have to work at.

Has there been a major life event that completely changed how you think about money and personal finance? What was it, and how did it change you?

Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry

2010-11-15T23:34:00.002-05:00

Ever come back from vacation to get hit with an avalanche of stuff that piled up while you were gone?

Yeah. That happened to me.

In addition to that, we had the New York City Marathon, and I had some marathon activities throughout the week. (I also jumped in to run the last six miles with a friend, which is strictly forbidden.) My awesome house guest showed up for four days after that, and then I went to a wedding and left the wedding reception early to fly out here to sunny California on business.

I'm hoping to carve out a little time this weekend to play catch-up. Thanks for your patience in the meantime. (I seem to be saying that far too much lately!)

Historic Rome

2010-11-01T20:59:00.004-05:00

Like many other visitors to Rome, one of the main attractions for me was its long, rich history as one of the earliest foundations of Western civilization. Having grown up in a place that wasn't settled until the 1840's, I find New York's history of European settlement dating back to the 1600's incredibly ancient. From this perspective, it's hard to fathom buildings and settlements dating back two thousand years or more, especially juxtapositioned within a modern, vibrant city.

I guess wanting to see and hopefully understand a little more about truly ancient history is more or less what I was looking for when I came. In that respect, Rome delivered. Over the week I was there, I managed to cover every neighborhood in the historic center, as well as a visit to the Via Appia Antica, which is still in Rome but a short, hair-raising public bus trip away from the center. This visit to one of the the ancient Roman roads was one of the biggest highlights of my stay. I stopped in at the tomb of Cecelia Metella, a first-century noblewoman's wife. The tomb was written up in my guidebook as a not-to-be-missed highlight, but after having seen so many museums and churches and ruins already, I thought it was a nice building but otherwise a washout because so much of the interesting stuff had been stripped away. (Maybe some people are interested in detailed descriptions of earth striations, but I'm not.) It was a nice day and the public bus wasn't coming back anytime soon, so I walked farther along the ancient road until I came to the catacombs of St. Sebastian. The location is marked by a fourth-century church in honor of St. Sebastian built over a long stretch of catacombs (7.6 miles, I think) dating back to the second century, where pagans and Christians alike were buried in wall niches covered with marble or terracotta plaques.

The catacombs sounded interesting despite the dry passing reference in my guidebook, but the only way to see them was on a guided tour because apparently it's quite easy to get lost down there. I managed to join a tour conducted in English, and it was absolutely fascinating. The guide pointed out and explained ancient symbols and graffiti left over the centuries (I finally get why a fish symbolizes Jesus!), including scribbles left on the walls by people who gathered to celebrate and pray to St. Peter and St. Paul. There were also three underground mausoleums, part of what used to be a thriving necropolis business for the entombment of wealthy individuals and their families. There was a special chapel built in the area where St. Sebastian's body had been entombed in the second century, which was interesting but also slightly disappointing: While it was fascinating to see the nearly two thousand year old stone box in which his remains had been stored (the chapel was built around it, although the remains themselves are now housed in St. Peter's Basilica), I would much rather have seen the tomb as it originally was. In any case, getting a sense of how people two thousand years ago came to terms with death - or in some cases, didn't come to terms with it - seemed to help bridge the gap spanning the centuries separating the ancient world from the world of today. The mystery of what happens after death is still as big, scary, and unknown as it was back then, and religion is still needed by so many to hold back the dark unknown. In that sense, it seems like the people of ancient Rome and the people of today could probably understand and relate to each other.

Another historic highlight was a visit to the Museo Capitolini, which houses an unimaginable amount of ancient statuary. I spent a great deal of time wandering through the Hall of the Emperors, a room that is actually quite small but contains busts of many of the ancient heads of state. The carvings became more true to life over time, and the one that fascinated me the most was of Vespasian (67-79 AD). It's impossible to see from the linked image, but Vespasian's bust showed a man in late middle age with deep, careworn lines etched in his face. I know very little about Vespasian's reign, but he looked like a calm man of wisdom who was nonetheless no stranger to stress, worry, and probably a lot of sleepless nights.

I spent a whole day at St. Peter's Basilica and the Vatican museums. The Basilica took only ten minutes of waiting to enter, and I climbed the 600 plus steps to the cupola to see both the city view and the basilica floor. There was so much there and it was all so ornate that I know I didn't take in as much as I would have liked. The size alone is unimaginable, and there are side chapels and funerary monuments everywhere for saints, popes, and a lot of people I've never heard of but who must have historic importance in the Catholic church. A service started while I was in the basilica. I'm not religious myself, but I opted to leave rather than gawk at people trying to worship in peace.

By the time I trudged out of the basilica, the lineup for the Vatican museums was two and a half hours long, and the trip through the many museums on feet that were already sore and tired was totally overwhelming. Here too, my art receptors shut down without taking everything in, so while I spent plenty of time lingering over Egyptian historic relics and sculpture, I walked past the maps and tapestries without spending more than a few minutes looking at them. The last stop on the route was the Sistine Chapel, which was every bit as breathtaking as I've ever heard. Here too, the work is too overwhelming to take in at once, although having read up on the meaning of some of the ceiling and wall frescoes helped.

While the size and majesty of the Vatican is a testament to the strength and power of Christianity over the centuries, it left me cold in some ways. Not having been raised with religion, I found it a heck of a lot harder to find spiritual meaning in the overwhelming magnitude and ornateness of the Vatican than I saw in things like the worry carved into Vespasian's image. I'm sure a lot of people do find spiritual meaning in exactly the places I couldn't, and that's fine; it just wasn't for me.

Finally, another historic highlight of my visit was the Pantheon. I knew before going that the Pantheon was one of the oldest surviving buildings from the early Roman period, having been completely rebuilt by Hadrian in the first century after the original was destroyed by fire. What I hadn't realized, however, was that five hundred years later, the inside of the Pantheon was ripped out and consecrated as a Christian church. While the interior of the Pantheon is no less ornate than the other historic Christian churches I saw, the smaller size and scale made it much easier to take in and appreciate the artwork and the monuments to historic figures entombed there.

There were so many other places I visited, but these were a few key highlights that made me realize how very little I know about this cradle of civilization. I'm planning on doing a lot more reading about the early Roman empire and its eventual collapse, and also the rise of Christianity, mostly because I feel like there are a lot of gaps to fill in in order to make more sense of my experience.

What are some of the highlights of your travels?

Home

2010-10-31T09:14:00.000-05:00

I'm back.

I'm tired.

It was WONDERFUL.

Trip report coming. . .

Ack! I ran out of time

2010-10-22T06:28:00.003-05:00

I'm heading to the airport for Italy early this afternoon, and I'm so swamped with last-minute work things that I haven't had any downtime this entire week. I didn't even start packing until late last night.

Couple of quick things before I go:

I'm aiming for a total budget of $1200 for seven nights and seven and a half days. I'd like to use my credit card as much as possible (I never carry a balance, folks), but in the past couple of years some restaurants have started tacking on a five to ten percent surcharge for credit card users. I don't want to pay any surcharges, so I'm taking 300 euros ($450) in cash and I've mapped out directions to a branch of my bank in Rome in case I need to use the ATM. I also called both the bank and my credit card company to tell them I'm traveling, and also to verify with my bank that my PIN will work, since apparently six-digit PIN numbers aren't always accepted at ATMs in Europe.

I also contacted my cell phone company to add unlimited international email to my phone, so I can keep tabs on work stuff while I'm gone. Internet use costs an appalling $15 per megabyte download, so I'm logging out of all internet applications before takeoff.

I checked for free wireless hotspots in Rome (widely available), which will allow free internet access from my phone. I might pop in once in a while over the next week if I happen to think of it and find a hotspot at the same time.

Overall, it's going to be a mad scramble to finish up everything by the time I have to leave for the airport, but I think I'm more or less prepared. I haven't had enough time to map out detailed itineraries for the trip, but I've got a very long plane ride to think about it.

I'll leave you with a couple of good links: First, an inspiring look at eight people who paid off an aggregate $90,000 in consumer debt, along with their strategies for digging themselves out.

Second, I missed seeing this live because I don't have television, but one of the fringe candidates for governor of New York made a big impression at the gubernatorial debate last week:

That's it for now, and see you on the flip side.

21 awesome commenters couldn't possibly be wrong

2010-10-18T20:50:00.005-05:00

Thank you so much to everyone who took the time to give such thoughtful feedback about directions for blogging and my writing in general. Since it sounds like there's interest in the non-personal finance realm, I'll roll with it here and see what happens. The prospect shouldn't be intimidating but it is, just a bit. Be patient with me.

In the meantime, I couldn't resist throwing one more financial topic into the mix. This weekend, I came across an article in the New York Times about Japan's deflationary spiral over the past twenty years. I was living in Japan when the economy went south, and the changes in such a short time were unbelievable. In 1991 and early 1992, I remember families taking out multi-generational mortgages to buy homes in Tokyo because real estate was so astronomically expensive. I also remember that for young women, the new trend in jewelry was diamonds embedded into cellphones, presumably because young women generally had all the diamonds they needed in regular jewelry already. I didn't experience much of the high life myself because I was an English teacher in a small town, figuring out how to cook lasagna in a toaster oven and discovering that semi-automatic washing machines of that era didn't do jack for getting clothes clean. In a country where a canteloupe cost $40 and came wrapped up in cushioning to protect it from the slightest bruise, though, signs of the rampant economy were awfully hard to miss.

The bottom started falling out of the economy in 1992, and the changes were fast and sharp. The first 100 yen stores (dollar stores, basically) began opening up late in the year, and by the time 1993 rolled around, most people weren't buying diamonds for their cellphones anymore. Motsu-nabe (entrail stew) was turning up on restaurant menus and cooking programs because it was cheap. Layoffs didn't start until after I left, but in the months before I came back to the US, there were several corporate scandals related to companies rescinding job offers to new college graduates. In a country where lifetime employment was simply expected, this was a cultural shift of seismic proportions.

I haven't been back to Japan since 1993, but my understanding is that economic stagnation worsened after I left and the return to normal that so many Western nations (except Australia, which ~~never had a recession~~ wasn't impacted by the current global recession, and maybe to a lesser extent Canada) are looking for never came.

I'm not too worried personally about deflation in the US, because I think there is much more willingness to intervene in the economy to prevent it than Japan experienced. I do wonder if the sense of long-term diminished expectations described in the article will take root in the countries affected by the global recession, though. Do you feel as though you're facing diminished economic expectations in your own life relative to three or four years ago? Why or why not?

Help me figure out which end is up

2010-10-15T12:38:00.006-05:00

Better get a cup of coffee. We're going to be here for a while.

Lately, I've been pondering what to do about blogging and direction. In some ways, I feel as though I've beaten the personal finance horse to death. After all, there are only so many times you can chant Spend less than you earn! Spend less than you earn! before people start tuning out. In addition, I'm in a good place financially: No debt, healthy emergency fund, largely recovered investments, stable job (at least for now). I'm not rich, but I'm comfortable and working hard to keep it that way. I don't worry about finances the way I used to (and THAT is a godsend), but my current financial life really is not captivating reading.

While I still want to write about money, I'm also getting the urge to write more about other things, preferably the ironic and funny side of life that I tend to mostly leave out here unless I can tie it to finances in some way.

Is this the right place for that? Honestly, I don't know. People who like to talk personal finance more than anything else might stalk off in disgust. I could start another blog (either linked to this one or not), but I'm not sure if that's an improvement or a bigger distraction. I could do a twitter feed (there are some hilarously funny ones out there), but I'm not sure that twitter really grabs me all that much.

What do you think? Would you be interested in reading more about everyday crap that may or may not be amusing? If so, would you rather see it here, in another linked blog, in a twitter feed, or in an unlinked blog?

I'm open to other suggestions as well. Tell me what you want.

This might be the new normal

2010-10-13T10:00:00.000-05:00

I'm sure this topic has been debated to death across the blogosphere, but this article about unemployed people over age 50 facing the likelihood of never working again really caught my attention when it was published a month ago, and it's stayed with me ever since.

As the article mentions, many older workers bring a great deal to the table in terms of experience and judgment. In many cases, however, technology has changed faster than many people can or are willing to adapt. In addition, the perception that older workers resist change and take longer to process information easily overshadows the benefits that age and experience bring. The article didn't mention anything about the cost differential of hiring younger workers versus older ones, but I think it's hard to argue against the notion that older workers will rack up more medical claims than younger ones on average, resulting in higher overall costs for employers who provide insurance benefits. Similarly, experience and salary growth over time mean that older workers generally cost more to hire and keep than younger ones. All of those factors together put people over 50 (or heck, even over 40) at a competitive disadvantage in a tight job market.

So is it realistic to anticipate that unemployment over 50 means involuntary retirement? For people who haven't stayed intellectually agile and willing to change with the times, I think the answer in many cases is yes.

Given that I'm marching towards my mid-40's with all due haste, that's a pretty intimidating prospect personally. This is especially true given that I've noticed since turning 40 that I don't see as well, remember as much, or think as fast on my feet as I used to.

I can't stop the natural progression of age, but there are some things I can do to help minimize the prospects of being caught up in the over-50 unemployment vortex. These include:

Staying healthy
I'm convinced that physical health and mental acuity are closely linked. Simply put, I find that my brain works better when I'm fit, active, and get enough sleep, and that makes me much more productive at work. In addition, given the prevalence of cancer and heart disease on both sides of my family, anything I can do that will minimize my risk of crapping out from something major is a plus.

Keeping my brain active outside of work
Reading matters, and complex reading is better than novels. I'm also considering subscribing to the New York Times during the week again because I really miss the challenge of the crosswords (even though I've never been able to complete a Saturday or Sunday puzzle and rarely nail the Friday ones). I think writing challenges the brain, too. Recent absences to the contrary, it's important to me to keep pushing my brain to work by continuing to exercise my blogging muscles.

Maintaining and expanding my professional skill set
This includes not only the skills directly relevant to my profession, but also general technology skills. In the linked article, the unemployed workers over 50 who were profiled had all fallen behind in technology. Staying ahead of the curve (or at least on the curve) in technology means being able to maintain or increase work productivity. It also means increased opportunities to spot a way for employers to leverage new technology to either make more money or save money, and an employee who can do that is intrinsically valuable.

If you want to sum up all of the above into one sentence, it's very simple: Don't get complacent. In a tight job market, that's the kiss of death.

Beyond being proactive about maintaining viability in the job market, I think it's important to maintain a conservative financial outlook. In other words, I don't think it's wise for anyone working to assume that he or she will ever bring in more income than today, so work with what you have. I know how pessimistic that is, but I'd rather be pessimistic and wrong (but with plenty of savings) than overly optimistic, wrong, and dead broke.

What other suggestions do you have for maintaining and growing financial stability and employment security in hard times? Do you think age has impacted your employability? Why or why not?

Wet and wild

2010-10-12T10:50:00.004-05:00

That was my fall marathon, folks. It rained the whole way through. It lessened to no more than a sprinkle at times, but I stopped counting after the first seven individual cloudbursts. I ran this one much slower than I wanted: It wasn't my worst by far, but I also missed the qualification window for Boston 2012. (Thanks to a good race last fall, I'm still in for 2011.)

While the weather wasn't helpful, I think the extra eight to ten pounds I'm carrying did much more than the rain to slow me down. It motivated me to get on top of it before running Boston in the spring, and I re-registered for this marathon again next October so I can go back and have another try at running it faster.

Back to our regular PF blog here. Stay tuned.

Stuff about stuff

2010-10-02T13:53:00.005-05:00

Once upon a time, I thought I was a minimalist. I live in a small (under 600 square feet) apartment that actually feels pretty spacious thanks to neatness, clever built-ins courtesy of the prior owner, and a general lack of crap and clutter hanging around. After seeing sites by real minimalists (here, here, and here), though, I don't think minimalism is a term that describes me particularly well. I don't have a single word to describe my relationship with things, but I guess you could say that the stuff I have is here for a reason: I use it, I find it aesthetically appealing, or (in rare cases), there's some sentimental attachment. I've been told a couple of times that my home seems a little sterile because I don't have a whole lot in the way of decorations or personal things on display, but more people seem to like the quiet openness than not.

I mentioned in my last post that I just had a house guest for a week, which is something I do several times a year. A week's worth of guest possessions in the living room really isn't a lot, but it sure feels like it. The difference in the amount of free space with my guests's things was significant, and it definitely took extra effort to keep my place livable for both of us. I like having visitors, so I didn't and don't mind the temporary clutter and extra work. Even the three weeks my sibling lived here while Mom was in the hospital last spring didn't seem like a big deal, and the people who visit generally are great about keeping their things semi-organized. If that small amount of extra stuff belonged to me and I had to figure out how to manage storing and living with it, though, I think I'd start to feel suffocated.

Overall, I feel like my relationship with things is pretty healthy: Outside of groceries, I don't bring things in without getting rid of other things (one in, one out is a good rule of thumb), and I'm not a power shopper by any stretch of the imagination because there are too many other things I'd like to do with money other than pack more stuff into a small apartment. In addition, it's important to me to buy quality as opposed to quantity. If I'm contemplating a pricey purchase, I'll do a lot of due diligence to make sure that the quality justifies the cost. (Lately, I've been doing this over both the Kindle and selected Le Creuset cast iron cookware. Given that my non-stick cookware is both seventeen years old and badly scratched up on the inside, I might actually pull the trigger on the cookware one of these days.)

Once in a while, though, there are times that I feel really drawn to buy things just for the sake of buying them, and that usually happens when something is out of balance somewhere else in my life. I've found that it's helpful during those times not only to do a simple need/want analysis, but also to spend some time taking a step back to figure out what the real problem is and seeing if there's a better way to fix it.

Doing this doesn't mean that I don't make dumb purchases once in a while, and it certainly hasn't stopped me from salivating over the Crate and Barrel catalog. In general, though, it's saved me a lot of money over time. Taking the time to really think things through has also saved storage space, time spent using or doing maintenance on impulse purchases, and kept me from feeling the hefty sense of guilt that comes along with throwing money out the window. All in all, it works pretty well.

How's your relationship with the amount of things in your life? Do you shop when your life is out of balance?

Third quarter goals update

2010-09-30T16:20:00.004-05:00

Helleeeeewwwwww. I didn't forget about you guys, honestly. I'm just off of the toughest two weeks at work I've had in a while. Somewhere in the middle of that, I had a house guest for a week and I've just gotten my home back (more or less).

More on that next post.

In the meantime, it's the end of September and that means it's time to check in on my 2010 goals. Here's how it all shook out:

Financial
Max out Roth 401(k)
Action plan: Ongoing payroll deductions
Q1 update: On track
Q2 update: On track
Q3 update: On track. In order to achieve this one, I need to increase my contribution by a small percentage in December and then bring it back down again in January. It seems like a stupid way to do things, but it's the only way I can maximize my employer match and contribute the full $16,500 allowed by law.

Max out IRA
Action plan: Fund IRA with after-tax savings.
Q1 update: Completed
Q2 update: N/A
Q3 update: N/A

Convert most of traditional IRA to Roth IRA
Action plan: Fund IRA first and then do a rollover with the account holder.
Q1 update: Completed
Q2 update: N/A
Q3 update: N/A

Save $63,000
Sharp-eyed readers who have been around for a while will note that this is less than my 2009 goal of $65,000. I dropped it for three reasons: First, I didn't get a pay raise last year, and I'm not expecting to necessarily get one this year. Second, my prescription costs shot up significantly for 2010. Third, I'm planning to have a little more fun this year.
Action plan: Max out 401(k) and IRA, and save an additional $41,500 after tax.
Q1 update: If it wasn't for throwing my entire federal tax refund into savings, I'd be behind on this one. Non-401(k) saving accounts for a monthly $3875 nut to reach my goal, and I'm coming up about a hundred dollars short on average. My most costly months of the year are January through May, so I'm going to work on bringing this into alignment over the next quarter. As it is, however, thanks to my tax refund, my IRA is maxed out and non-401(k) savings for 2010 total $14,800 to date.
Q2 update: I was doing better on this one in April, and then in May and June I went off the rails again. Unanticipated costs included two airline tickets out West (one at the last minute), plus a whole lot of eating out while my mom was in the hospital. SO and I went away overnight last weekend too, and I picked up a big chunk of the cost for that. I'm still ahead of plan because of last quarter's tax refund, though, so non-401(k) savings for 2010 total $26,500.
Q3 update: Thanks to a 5% bonus I'm on track to exceed this one, even with holiday tipping, holiday charitable contributions, and a trip to Italy looming. Non-401(k) savings so far total $40,800.

Maintain elite status on my preferred airline
Action plan: Log 25,000 flight miles this year. As long as the cost differential isn't huge, the upgrades and free baggage in this dismal flight environment are well worth sticking to a single airline.
Q1 update: I'm about 20% to goal, so this one is a little behind schedule.
Q2 update: 40% to goal. By the end of this month, I'll be 60% there thanks to another trip out West to visit my mom, and I have two more of those to go this year. It looks like I'll probably hit this one by year end.
Q3 update: 60% to goal, and mileage accrued from two more flights I have booked will put me over the top. I also have a business trip to sunny California next month, so that'll be worth an extra few thousand miles.

Upgrade appliances before they break
Action plan: My washer and dryer are on their last legs and I'll be surprised if they make it through the year, so I have some research and advance financial planning to do! I will also most likely need to replace my coffeemaker and iron. Recommendations are always appreciated.
Q1 update: Not started. I'm hoping for the best right now, as I'm not confident enough about the job situation to make a big purchase if I can avoid it.
Q2 update: Not started. I'm not worried about my job anymore, but this one hasn't been a priority.
Q2 update: Not started. This one's not going to happen this year unless the appliances actually give out. Maybe next year. . .

Health and Fitness
Stay within 5 pounds of goal weight
Action plan: Keep running and doing yoga, and keep sugar consumption under control.
Q1 update: Way off the rails. Between work suddenly exploding and two lung infections so far this year, my physical activity has slipped considerably. Add to that the fact that I haven't been able to get the sugar monster back under control, and the end result is that I do not want to weigh myself. I'm guessing I'm up around ten pounds.
Q2 update: No change from last quarter. I'm marathon training now and trying to get the sugar back under control. Thanks to three days of a GI bug this weekend, I suspect I'm suddenly a little lighter.
Q3 update: With a marathon just ten days away, that ship has sailed. No improvement in the sugar intake; if anything, I might have gone in the other direction. My weight's not where I want it to be, so I'm not expecting a sub-3:40 marathon this time around. At least I know I'll lose a couple of pounds that day!

Qualify for the 2012 Boston Marathon
Action plan: I need to run a marathon in under 3:50 once the 2012 qualifying season opens. (I may run one other, but the qualifying one is the only one that matters to me.)
Q1 update: Not started. Training ramps up in June, so I have the rest of the quarter to pull myself together and get back to a decent fitness baseline.
Q2 update: The baseline never happened after my mom's stroke. I'm on schedule with my planned marathon training and mileage, but I am slow, sore, and exhausted all the time right now.
Q3 update: After a rocky start, I actually had a good training season. I don't think the speed is quite there, but with seven runs of twenty miles or more, I feel confident I'll finish and have a good shot at qualifying for Boston again, even if I'm not likely to churn out a peak performance.

Continue increasing flexibility
Action plan: Commit to yoga classes or home practice three times per week.
Q1 update: Yeah, that's not working so far. Part of the problem is that I had a huge crash while attempting a fairly advanced pose almost a month ago, and I tweaked my wrist very badly. It still hurts.
Q2 update: My wrist hurt for nearly six weeks in the end. This also went by the wayside after my mom got sick, but I went to two classes last week and two the week before. I've lost a huge amount of ground here as well.
Q3 update: No improvement gain, but no loss either. I'm moderately satisfied.

Moderate sugar intake
Action plan: After a year of being almost entirely sugar-free, the cravings are coming back. I'd like to leave room for an occasional treat, emphasis on occasional. For me, I think occasional means once or twice a month. The usual exclusions (fruit and alcohol) apply.
Q1 update: See above. I think I will need to go completely back on the wagon in order to get this one under control.
Q2 update: As of July 01, I'm not bringing sweets in the house any longer. That's got to help, right?
Q3 update: Umm. . . . this hasn't been working out too well. The Japanese have a good proverb for situations like this: Fall down seven times, stand up eight.

Sleep more
Action plan: Keep my coffee consumption at no more than six cups a day (don't laugh, for me this is limited) and get to sleep no later than 10:30 p.m. for at least four days of the work week.
Q1 update: Coffee and sleep are both very much off track. Unfortunately, it's easy to address lack of sleep via coffee. . . which results in even more sleep disturbance.
Q2 update:No improvement thus far.
Q3 update:This is a bit back and forth. I was doing well for a while, but at the moment coffee's up and sleep is down. Work has a lot to do with it.

Home
Maintain good organizational habits
Action plan: Deep cleaning twice a year, regular cleaning once a week or so, and monthly decluttering sweeps.
Q1 update: Yay! Found one where I'm still on track!
Q2 update: Still on track. My mom's place is more cluttered than I'm comfortable with, so I ended up doing a major decluttering binge as soon as I got back. Things are good in this department.
Q3 update: Still good.

Professional Development
Get a new job
Action plan: Networking is by far the most effective way I've found to find opportunities and that's kind of a challenge area for me, so I'll work at leveraging both professional and personal relationships.
Q1 update: I haven't been looking or networking much, largely because the outlook is better where I am at the moment. We are not done with layoffs and I'm not fully confident that I won't get swept up in a future wave, but I'm less concerned now than I was six months ago.
Q2 update: My mom's stroke was a game changer. I don't think I could go anywhere else that would give me the flexibility I have to work anywhere I want at any time, no questions asked. Similarly, I'm not worried about losing my job anymore. As long as my mom is alive (and I'm not optimistic that it will be a long time), I'm digging in and staying put. This one is off the goals list for the rest of the year.
Q3 update:This one is off the table for the foreseeable future. At least we are done with layoffs.

Improve presentation skills
Action plan: I'm an active member of a speechmaking organization, and I'd like to complete ten speeches by the end of the calendar year.
Q1 update: Mostly on track, although ten speeches by the end of December may be a stretch. Part of this is the result of schedule conflicts, but I've also been taking on other group roles because I haven't felt like pushing forward with the speeches as quickly as I did a couple of months ago.
Q2: No progress, although I have done a couple of formal presentations for work and they went quite well. If I can get one more practice speech done, I'll be halfway to ten. That seems like a reasonable mini-goal for the next quarter.
Q3: No progress. I had to back-burner this one because of work obligations.

Maintain professional certifications
Action plan: I have a certain number of credit hours of training and self-study to complete to stay on track for my next renewal cycle, and I plan to complete those accordingly.
Q1 update: On track. Half of my required credits for this year are in the can, and hopefully I'll be able to get the rest in before September.
Q2 update: No progress this quarter.
Q3 update: No progress this quarter, but I hope to pick up some credits while I'm in California next month.

Personal Development
Write more
Action plan: Continue blogging, but explore other forms of written expression
Q1 update: Not started. Focusing more on keeping my job at the moment.
Q2 update: Not started. Not a priority right now.
Q3 update: Not started. Not a priority right now.

Read with focus
Action plan: I'm not sure if this is an age thing or related to the way the internet has negatively impacted my attention span (I assure you, it has), but I need to redevelop the ability to read in depth and with focus. I'm operationalizing this in 2010 by reading books, magazines, and the New York Times for at least three hours a week without competing distractions like music or eating.
Q1 update: On track. . . sort of. I managed to borrow all four seasons of Battlestar Galactica, and that has proven to be a huge distraction.
Q2 update:Hasn't gotten better, but also hasn't gotten worse.
Q3 update:I've been concentrating a little better. Having the stress of my mom's stroke and the threat of layoffs back off has helped considerably.

Do more and donate more for charity
Action plan: I organize a holiday food drive every year, and I plan to continue doing that. I also plan to contribute more to charity than I did last year.
Q1 update: I'm behind on contributions this year relative to last year.
Q2 update: Still behind.
Q2 update: Still behind, but I've scheduled in my annual giving for Q4.

Relationships
Improve communication and harmony with my S.O.
Action plan: This has been a tough year for us. We realize that we need to improve how we communicate, so we are both trying to adopt active listening techniques more often. I also absolutely need to overcome having a short fuse and misdirected aggravation when I'm stressed out.
Q1 update: Uhh, we're on a break. It's probably not going to be permanent, but we both need space right now.
Q2 update: Break's over. We are trying to get back on track. I hope the fact that SO is working again helps.
Q3 update: We broke up, so this one is off the table.

Write letters more often
Action plan: I have several overseas friends with whom I communicate primarily via snail mail. I don't write as often as I should, so I'm aiming to send between one and two letters to each throughout the course of the year. (I'm not always writing in English, so this is a little more challenging/less pathetic of a goal than it looks.)
Q1 update: Not started
Q2 update: Not started
Q3 update: Not started

Entertain at home once a quarter
Action plan: I love having people over, and I don't do it as often as I'd like. I think a dinner party every three months sounds both reasonable and fun.
Q1 update: On track. Had a small dinner party not too long ago, and the food came out better than I expected. Everyone seemed to have fun, too.
Q2 update: Well, my sibling lived here for three weeks while my mom was in the hospital. That doesn't really count, though.
Q3 update: My cooking club came over last month, and it was a great dinner all around. I'm happy with this one thus far.

Travel
Take two trips, just for fun
Action plan: My friends and I want to do a repeat of our San Francisco trip last year. I'd like to do one more in addition to that, but I haven't figured out where yet.
Q1 update: Not really started (i.e., no concrete plans yet), but we are talking about it.
Q2 update:The friend trip is not likely to happen; more friends or their spouses have been laid off recently. I'm going to Italy in October on my own, though. Woo woo!
Q3 update:Three weeks to Italy!

Fun and self-love
This is kind of an artsy-fartsy category that I'm having difficulty defining in terms of specific goals. The background is that I'm told by a number of friends that I am pretty hard on myself in terms of not being self-indulgent at all if it costs money. For that reason, I'm giving myself blanket approval to do a little spending just because I want to. That could include buying things like flowers, nice bath salts, or Philharmonic or opera tickets once in a while, or just taking a day off from work and doing nothing. I hate leaving this one so undefined, but that's the best I've got right now. If I can nail it down more specifically at mid-year, I will.
Q1 update: I've bought flowers for my dining room table a couple of times. Does that count?
Q2 update: I'm going to Italy! That definitely counts.
Q3 update: I replaced a lot of clothes that were getting ratty or just didn't look right anymore, and I'm going out with my friends more. I'd call this one okay.

Well, you can see that outside of saving, I'm not doing so hot on my goals this year. So much has changed in the past six months or so that many of them just don't seem relevant anymore. I'll limp through with this set until the end of the year, though, and hopefully 2011 will have fewer major surprises.

How's your progress on your 2010 goals? Has anything major changed in your life to either throw you off track or make achieving your goals more attainable?

The crushing burden of student loan debt

2010-09-19T19:34:00.005-05:00

Sorry. . . I know this is really late. I suppose I could tell you I was too busy to post, but I'm actually in one of those lull periods at the moment where I just feel like backing off from blogging for a while. The lulls usually don't last all that long, and I'll be back when I feel more motivated (which will probably also be right around the time I'm done with the marathon).

In the meantime, I received a very interesting email from commenter goldsmith, and he graciously allowed me to share it with you. Goldsmith is from the EU, so I thought his take on this topic was very interesting indeed:

Hi fz,

Just saw this:

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/04/your-money/04money.html/?src=ISMR_AP_LO_MST_FB

It really threw me, mostly because the young people profiled have done nothing wrong. The idea that one can end up with a debt of over 100k USD just for an undergraduate degree is deeply disturbing. And this trend is coming to Europe, where university studies are getting ever more expensive, although fees are nowhere near US levels yet.

Not like I am for mollycoddling the young ones, but that young people should start into their lives together burdened by such debt levels simply for their education seems really wrong.

Would you think blogging about it?

I think goldsmith is quite right in that it's upsetting to see young people starting off their adult lives in heavy debt. It's particularly disturbing given the fact that thanks to the magic of compound interest, time is vitally important: Young people who can't scrape savings together early on because of college debt will, on average, end up with substantially less wealth later in life because of the opportunity cost incurred by student loan debt.

In the US college financing system, there is a built-in assumption that parents will contribute to college costs, and student loan debt is there to fill in the gaps. This assumption was already taking a beating when I was in college twenty years ago, but I think many parents today have concluded that their contributions to educational costs will be minimal to nothing, leaving the entire financing burden to the children. Some of this is undoubtedly the impact of less than optimal choices (lack of spending discipline, buying too much house, and so on), but the economic downturn has without question hit parents' ability to set savings aside for college particularly hard. I think another major driver of this change in attitude about financing is the fact that for a number of years now, college costs in the US have vastly outpaced inflation, and it's simply getting harder and harder for families to cover those expenses.

I was lucky: My parents started saving for college for both me and my sibling the week each of us were born. We didn't have a lot of extras in my childhood, but the basics were always covered. My parents' retirement and our college were treated as basics, and saving for both at rates that increased as their salaries rose was treated as non-negotiable. My parents' ability to save for college was made possible both by their Depression-era black belt frugality, and by the fact that neither of my parents was ever out of work.

Throughout high school and college, my sibling and I were expected to work part-time in order to cover our books, shared car, and personal expenses (and this included rent if we opted to live off campus as college students). We were also expected to earn scholarship money. In addition, we got a break in college tuition costs because we both attended the same college with a two-year overlap. All of these factors made it possible for us to graduate from a small, private college and study abroad with zero debt after graduation.

In today's economic climate, especially with the rampant rise in tuition costs, I'm not at all confident that my middle-class parents would be able to pull off the same achievement again, at least not as well as they did twenty to twenty-four years ago.

If you live in the US and have kids, how will you (or they) finance college? Are you saving for it now? Why or why not? If you graduated with heavy student loan debt, how has it impacted your life?

If you live outside the US, how is higher education financed in your country, and do you see it changing in the future?

When you know better, you do better - is it true?

2010-09-12T19:12:00.003-05:00

This weekend's New York Times contained a sobering article about a severe increase over the last two years of families whose only home is a homeless shelter. The article profiled one particular family and broadly outlined the series of circumstances that led to their becoming homeless. There's no question that some of the choices this particular family made contributed greatly to their dilemma since they were obviously living well beyond their means, but I can't help feeling bad for the kids who end up in this kind of situation. I wonder if the parents had access to any better guidance, and if not, whether that would have helped them avoid the sad situation they are in today.

Let's play make-believe. I'm sure each of us knows someone who is facing true financial hardship. For the person or family you have in mind, what do you think is the root cause of his/her/their financial difficulties? If you had the opportunity to step in and guide that person or family in a positive direction, what would your guidance be?

As an aside, I'm in my last week of heavy marathon training and I'm truly wiped out. I've got more topic in mind to post over the next few days, but I should have more free time (and hopefully a little more rest) after the end of this week. As always, thanks for your patience in the meantime.

Kindling

2010-09-03T20:53:00.003-05:00

The next generation Kindle with wifi was recently released, and last week I got the opportunity to play with one for a while.

I'm not normally a gadgethead, but this one knocked my socks off. The price point for the non-3G version (which is perfectly adequate for me) is $139, significantly lower than the original Kindle ($400 or thereabouts, if I remember correctly). It's light, fast, easy to read, and has an impressive battery life because the only time it actually uses juice outside of wifi connectivity is on page turns. The big attraction for me is what interested me in the original Kindle: Wifi subscription service to the New York Times. I cancelled my newspaper subscription outside of weekends over a year ago because the only time I could read the paper was on my commute, and the paper simply wasn't arriving before my 6:10 a.m. departure.

Even though my weekend subscription gives me access to the Times online, I don't always get the chance to read it. Between that and not having television, I feel annoyingly out of date on the news. For the cost of the Kindle and potentially a twenty bucks per month subscription, I could read the newspaper on my commute once more. Reviews of the New York Times subscription service for the Kindle are pretty mediocre, but major articles can be downloaded for free. Free makes mediocre look a little less, well, mediocre.

I'm hesitating a little bit before biting the bullet, and the reason is this: Technology evolves so quickly that I suspect a better Kindle is just around the corner. Wouldn't it be better to wait for that?

This is also the logic that sits behind my not having a flat-screen TV (well, that and the fact that I don't want to pay for cable), or an i-Anything.

In addition to being a little intimidated by the prospect of sinking money into a technology that might soon be obsolete, I get irritated by having to rebuy technology over and over, as I've done several times now with my Blackberry. My employer pays for the device and service, but normally by the time I'm approaching the end of a two-year contract, the device is on its last legs. I'm on my third model in five years, and that's after using the previous two until they fell apart. I'm not feeling the pinch personally because of my employer's willingness to shoulder the cost, but I would absolutely hate being on that treadmill if it was coming out of my own pocket.

What do you think: Kindle or no Kindle, and why? Also, you've seen some of my decision factors when it comes to buying technology. What do yours look like?

The incredible shrinking house

2010-08-30T14:24:00.006-05:00

I'm a little late off the mark on this one, but last week CNN posted an article detailing a trend in the US away from McMansions and towards smaller square footage in new home construction. Instead of more space, homeowners appear to be focused on amenities, including dishwashers and garbage dispoals.

I'm a huge fan of living small. I faced the question of whether bigger is better when I bought my co-op in 2001: Back then, the bank approved me for a $500,000 mortgage that I would have been extraordinarily hard pressed to make the payments on, and most people I knew urged me to aim at places three or even four times my salary. The apartments I saw within that range were really nice, but the cost of ownership was way too scary.

Buying small was partly my choice because I had a pretty good idea of what affordable meant in the context of my other financial goals, but co-op financing requirements in New York can be pretty stringent: I had to put a minimum of 20% down plus prove that I had matching funds in reserve, of which only half could be from my 401(k). The co-op's financial requirements radically limited my buying options, but as it turned out, that limit was certainly in my best interest.

Of course, New York is a weird place to buy a home relative to the rest of the country, and the kind of requirements I ran into aren't usually applicable elsewhere. It's not hard to guess why housing is going smaller now, though. After the last two brutal years, it's a whole lot harder to get a mortgage than it used to be. (Call me crazy, but I think that's a good thing.) In addition, I don't think there are too many people who feel secure enough about their income to want to take on the same level of mortgage they might have been open to a few years ago. I think the general difficulty of recouping one's investment by selling greatly reinforces this reluctance.

What other reasons are there for going smaller outside and/or more elaborate inside, in your opinion? Has your perspective on housing changed since the recession?