Organic Writer Activist

My Story (1 of ?)

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Tue, 11 Nov 2014 15:19:00 +0000

I started having symptoms in 2009. At the time I was misdiagnosed as bipolar and I was on every psychiatric horror drug known to man. Antipsychotics (Resperdal plus many, many more), Xanax or an equivalent and ambien. My doctor was convinced I was depressed because I was always fatigued. She said I was a difficult patient and I saw her every three months instead of six.

During that time I consumed lightly here and there and it really helped. I was writing Bipolar Chica (I was a popular mental health blogger at that time) and I branched out and wrote an article for Health.com about my marijuana use. The backlash was astounding. I got mass amounts of hate mail that said that a mother that consumed was no mother at all.

I got really scared for my family and stopped consuming for six years. It was the very worst thing I've ever done for my health, because I believe marijuana could've altered my course and that's when my symptoms started.

http://www.health.com/health/m/condition-article/0,,20274410,00.html

Wellness Journal | Psychogenic Non-Epileptic Seizures

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Sun, 09 Nov 2014 17:16:00 +0000

Psychogenic Non-Epileptic Seizures in Conversion Disorder

I just got off the phone with my spouse. I asked him where he was and why he wasn't here when I called out for him. He told me that he had given me a kiss and said he was going to the bank. I don't remember that happening whatsoever.

My memory is pretty shot today and it scares me. I have to learn how to cope better with this. It's frightening to know that my mind is escaping me, but I had an epiphany.

So many of us that develop all the components of Conversion Disorder go on to have very debilitating lives. It makes me wonder... once the seizures start... These seizures are considered non-epileptic and it isn't supposed to be terminal, but I think it is. What if the seizures are doing more damage to my brain?

Yesterday I had another seizure episode that lasted a little more than half an hour. Bill has been taking some video here and there of my episodes that I will share in the future, but for now I will retell last night's episode here.

I was getting upset about the medical marijuana bill. I have known for a very long time that my illness would not be on the list, but seeing it in black and white did a number on me. I was distraught. My arm immediately began having tremors, then my neck starting in with the tics that look like big jerks, and my ring finger started going nuts. I was trying to will my body to stop, but it wouldn't listen and I was getting frustrated and then I just shut down.

It was like I understood every single thing that was happening, but I couldn't speak or move any way I wanted. My eyes rolled and fluttered and it was so embarrassing to be out in public that way that I will not venture out again very soon. But beyond the embarrassment, I wasn't sure it was going to stop. The sheer pain that a seizure involves is debilitating. My entire body is cramped and my muscles hurt and my head is still hurting badly from a migraine that just won't quit. All light hurts my eyes and can trigger an episode. I was wearing my sunglasses yesterday, but it didn't do much good. I was at the Texas State Capital for a meeting for patients about medical marijuana. I somehow managed with Bill's help to make it to parking lot. I did make it and I am so very grateful to both Bill and the universe for seeing me through it. It's time for a wheelchair and a shower seat.

I'm was going to stop taking my oil altogether, but I don't think I will be doing that anymore. I am going to continue taking the light dose I'm on. I can't continue to have these seizures. I believe these seizures are doing more damage to my brain every single time I have one even if western medicine doesn't say so just yet. I see people in my support groups. The ones that have seizures fair worse than the ones that don't and I believe this is the reason for it. Today I have pretty bad memory loss. To completely forget that Bill told me goodbye? To not even be able to recall a smidge of it? No, thank you, universe! This is not how I wish to live. I will continue on my cannabis medication. I'm a believer and I will never stray!!

Wellness Journal | Psychogenic Dystonia

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Fri, 07 Nov 2014 07:37:00 +0000

There is no rhyme or reason when I get like this. My body is not my own. I am tired and frustrated and sick and it is a never ending cycle sometimes. Sometimes I can see my way out, but right now I'm so frazzled.

I have to give up my medicine for the next week and I'm crying right now because it's going to be so hard. I've been experiencing horrible dystonia all week with sharp, piercing pains in my legs. It makes me cry out in my sleep at night. I am slowly losing my mobility. I have to use the handicapped carts at the grocery store. My tremors are worse tonight, not only in my arms, but in my legs, too. This is what happened last time I had a MAJOR episode that lasted for over a week.

So, I estimated how long it took between stopping my medicine last time and the reoccurrence of symptoms. It was five days. My neurology appointment in Houston is next week. Last time I went I only stopped taking my oil for a day. I want them to see me without it. I want it videotaped as I'm sure it will be. I want my illness to be well documented. I want them to see how much better I do on cannabis oil than without.

There are times when I still feel so alone. I have met some people online that have what I have, but it doesn't make me feel better to know them. It makes me sad for all of us. It makes me sad that so little is known about Conversion Disorder. The UK is reclassifying this disorder as a physical disorder next year and I'm glad. Maybe more doctors will take what we suffer into account. There's just not enough research into a disorder that's been around since before Freud's time.

I guess what would make me feel not so alone would be if there would be cannabis oil studies done on Conversion Disorder. Heck, even to know one other person that consumed to compare notes on what is the very best way to consume to help our symptoms would be so awesome and would make me feel less alone.

I know that my road is hard. There is very little research and very little people get completely better. I'm hoping for a happy medium. I want to manage my disorder as best as I can and enjoy my life as much as I can for whatever it is---MOST DAYS, but this moment is just not one of them.

I know I will prevail. I just need rest and relaxation and laughter. I need love and I'm happy to say that I have that in spades around here! I adore my man, my children and our life together. It's what gets me through all the tough times, it's what I hold most dear and it's what fuels me to do what I do. Passion and life is what it's all about.

Whew. I just smiled. Feels great!

Research | Functional Neurological Disorder Diagnosis Acceptance

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Tue, 14 Oct 2014 19:22:00 +0000

Dear, Readers! First off, I would like to apologize that I haven't been writing blog posts for my "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis" series. I've been having some hard health days lately and I'm just not able to keep up. The stress of trying isn't helping either. I am committed to completing the project, but it will take me quite a bit of time to catch up and I'm going to do it slowly so it can be done correctly. :)

I have been diagnosed with Psychogenic Movement Disorder by three different neurologists, and, until today, I did not believe it. There isn't much research on this disorder in the U.S., but the world's leading expert, Dr. Mark Edwards, is in the UK and that's where all research on it stems from. In the UK, Psychogenic Movement Disorder is classified as Functional Neurological Disorder or Conversion Disorder. I prefer the term, Functional Neurological Disorder, over Psychogenic, because after just a bit of research, I discovered that it is actually a physical disorder, not a psychological one. While watching the following videos I started to believe that Functional Neurological Disorder is my correct diagnosis. Take a look and see why.

Holly's Conversion Disorder Fight, 5 min.

This video shows that the symptoms are very real. Health experts cannot explain FND fully.

Second Opinion | Conversion Disorder, 26 min.

Listen to the neurologist's explanation of how this is diagnosed and

"...the differences between neurology and psychology are becoming increasingly blurred."

After watching this video I looked up the definition to further my education.

What is Functional Neurological Disorder?

It is important to note here that the terms, "Functional Neurological Disorder" and "Conversion Disorder" are used primarily in the UK where the world's leading expert resides. This leaves many confused on their diagnosis and struggling to find where they fit in. They individually mean different things, however, they are all labels for the same disorder.

Functional Neurological Disorder provides an umbrella term for a variety of symptoms of apparent neurological origin but which current models struggle to explain psychologically or organically. Presentation may be similar to a wide range of other neurological conditions. FND/CD can be as debilitating as Parkinson’s disease and MS and have many similar symptoms. The most common misconception is that patients are in control of some or all of their symptoms. The patient does not consciously produce functional symptoms. A patient with conscious control of their symptoms has a different diagnosis such as Feigning, Malingering, or Munchausen Syndrome.

Functional Neurological Disorder can present with any motor or sensory symptoms in the body including:

Chronic Pain

Non-Epileptic Seizures

Speech Problems

Involuntary Movements

Paralysis/Weakness

Headaches/Migraines

Bladder/Bowel Changes

Cognitive Changes

Visual Changes

Sensory Symptoms

Sleep Disturbances

Gait/Balance Changes

Given the occurrence of these medically unexplained symptoms in patients with organic brain injury, spinal injury, post-anesthesia and post-viral illnesses, the modern term moves away from psychodynamic theory and provides a useful label for what is a complex and little understood disorder. [Source]

What is Psychogenic Movement Disorder?

To better explain this disorder, I find it pertinent to add this information from the U.S.

Psychogenic movement is an unwanted muscle movement such as a spasm or tremor that is caused by an underlying psychological condition. Psychogenic movement can involve any part of the body and resemble the same muscle movements that occur with a biological condition or structural abnormality. Most psychogenic movement is involuntary—done without being consciously initiated by the individual. Psychogenic movement may develop as part of a conversion disorder (in which a psychological event causes physical symptoms with no known medical cause). It also may result from a somatoform disorder (characterized predominantly by multi-system symptoms that are associated with distress and/or dysfunction), factitious disorder (an illness that simulates symptoms for psychological reasons), or malingering (not characterized as a psychiatric disorder but where illness is pretended as a way to achieve a secondary goal such as the acquisition of drugs or disability benefits). Unlike movement disorders caused by biological or structural conditions, psychogenic movement disorders commonly develop suddenly, progress rapidly to maximum severity, may increase in intensity, and come and go with complete or partial remissions. The movement may be less when the person is distracted, and the severity of symptoms varies among individuals. The course of the psychological condition may be short-lived or lead to chronic disability.

Psychogenic movement is uncommon before the age of 10 years. In children, the dominant limb is most often affected, while adults most frequently see movement in the nondominant limb.

Psychogenic movement disorders include:

Psychogenic tremor (also called functional tremor) can appear as any form of tremor movement. Characteristics may vary but generally include sudden onset and remission, increased incidence with stress, change in tremor direction and/or body part affected, and greatly decreased or disappearing tremor activity when the person is being distracted. Many individuals with psychogenic tremor have a conversion disorder.

Psychogenic dystonia involves involuntary muscle contractions that cause slow, repetitive movements or abnormal postures that are often severely painful. Onset may be abrupt or appear as part of a recurring attack. Psychogenic dystonia typically involves fixed postures, particularly from the start, whereas dystonia caused by a muscle or structural abnormality tends to involve more mobility and be action induced.Psychogenic myoclonus refers to sudden, involuntary muscle contractions (twitches) or jerking of a muscle or group of muscles that are caused by a psychological condition. Myoclonic jerks may occur alone or in sequence, in a pattern or without pattern. Increased startle or startle-like movements are frequent. Psychogenic myoclonus may occur spontaneously or be generated by an action or reflex. The twitching cannot be controlled by the person experiencing it.

Psychogenic parkinsonism involves rigid movements that are extremely slow and often associated with a great sense of effort and rapid onset of severe fatigue. Individuals with psychogenic parkinsonism may also have tremor. Symptoms are usually seen on both sides of the body.

Psychogenic gait disturbances feature unusual patterns of stance and gait. Individuals may stagger or veer from side to side when walking and appear to be losing their balance, but only rarely fall. Sudden knee buckling without falling is common. [Source]

The Research Process...

My brain was going overtime after watching the videos and reading the symptom list and definitions. The first video was shocking. The young lady had shaky voice issues just like me and, though her symptoms were more extreme than mine, I noticed that the twisting motions were the same. Her diagnosis was the same as mine. The second video explained more to me how a doctor actually comes to a diagnosis and I began to think about why it was that doctors were having such a hard time finding out what was wrong. Why weren't the tests conclusive? Why weren't medical tests like EEGs and MRIs showing problems when patients were obviously not faking it? According to the statistics, psychogenic movement disorder is the most common movement disorder in the spectrum of movement disorders with 2-3% of the world's population diagnosed as psychogenic. That means that movement disorder specialists see this type of movement more than any other movement disorder. That means that they must know by now what to look for. It was interesting to hear in the second video what differentiates the tremor in psychogenic movement disorder from a Parkinson's tremor. After watching the video, I knew that I believed I the legitimacy of my medical diagnosis.

I looked online and found that the facts presented in the videos were mirrored by other stories and accounts. I found a Functional Neurological Disorder/Conversion Disorder/fndhope.org group on FB and over 1,000 people discussing their diagnosis. Some of them didn't believe the diagnosis and some of them did. They all experience similar mysterious symptoms, but not all of their disorders present the same. Some of them have just one psychogenic component of the disorder like psychogenic epilepsy while some have multiple areas of concern. Some are attempting to heal themselves with EDMR, a PTSD psychological technique, to access the initial trauma that started their illness. Others focus on their physical symptoms and see occupational therapists to help them relearn how to use their bodies. Some say that their symptoms started in childhood and that they have family members that have Functional Neurological Disorder as well. This last part is particularly interesting both for the fact that this can't be a just a mental illness and for the fact that it can be genetic. That this happens in families also sets my mind at ease about this diagnosis since my recently estranged sister has the same disorder.

I noticed during my research on different types of neurological disorders that almost every condition has a mental illness component. Parkinson's, Huntington's, Lyme disease, fibromyalgia and epilepsy all list depression or anxiety as a symptom. I find it safe to say that there is much more medical research that needs to be done on this disorder. When functional neurological disorder patients hear that this disorder is caused by psychiatric trauma, they automatically discount it because they know that they are not making up their symptoms. Some patients have never even experienced any trauma and, therefore, don't believe their diagnosis.

Neurology and psychology are blurred in FND...

One thing that is abundantly clear is that all functional neurological disorder patients are all suffering and they are all upset with the way the medical community has classified the disorder as a mental illness. There is research coming out of the UK from the University of Cambridge that says that when an organic dystonia is present that the brain does something abnormal in one direction. The psychogenic brain is abnormal, too, but in the opposite direction of the organic disorder. This proves that Functional Neurological Disorder is indeed a neurological disorder, instead of a mental illness.

I had heard that I was crazy from doctors before. The first time I heard that my symptoms were in my head was in 2002 after my auto accident with an 18 wheeler. The back doctor told me that he didn't understand why I was in so much pain. I had numerous shots in my back, but still needed vidodin for the pain. After completing a dye test that showed that I had bad disks, I stopped seeing doctors except once a year for pain meds. Then, again, years later when I saw a gastro doctor for a vomiting problem that lasted over a year (it later resolved itself for no apparent reason) they told me that they didn't know what was wrong with me. So, I was fed up with doctors telling me that my symptoms were in my head. I thought I was just seeing stupid doctors, so I changed doctors every time.

I completely understand why anyone that receives this diagnosis wants to refute their doctor's findings. Most doctors are scientist type personalities and are missing a sensitivity chip. If patients were told from neurologists, "All neurological disorders have a component of mental illness and this one is not any different. You have a mysterious neurological illness that may or may not be caused by previous trauma. I can help you with medications, but PTSD therapies and occupational therapy have shown great results in your disorder," then that would make more of an impact.

All neurologists across the world agree that the quicker you can get this diagnosed and the quicker you get into treatment the more likely that Functional Neurological Disorder can be cured, but that happens infrequently. Most patients have reoccurring psychogenic illnesses for the rest of their lives. The disorder cannot be cured and most patients are using prescription medications and psychological therapies to control their symptoms.

Everything happens for a reason...

One more thing to note... After receiving my first diagnosis over a year ago, I researched this topic and found Dr. Jankovic, but forgot about him. A year later, as I was about to give up, I remembered only that he was a leading movement disorder specialist. I saw him two weeks ago and his diagnosis was psychogenic movement disorder. He, too, is missing a sensitivity chip, but not as much as some of the other neurologists. I left his office disappointed and ready to give up on all western medicine doctors. If I hadn't seen Holly's video and heard her story, then I may have gone the rest of my life disbelieving my correct diagnosis.

Everything happens for a reason. A year ago I wasn't meant to understand, but after watching Holly's video I have hope. Thank you, Holly, for being brave enough to share your story. I will be forever grateful. :)

Holly's Conversion Disorder Follow-up Video, 6 min.

Read about CC's story

Concentrate Smoking | 8 of 31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Thu, 09 Oct 2014 03:27:00 +0000

Concentrates are marijuana plants that have been cooked in a solvent. That means that hash, hash oil, and cannabis oil are all classified as concentrates. Concentrates are merely a stronger, more concentrated form of marijuana which is wonderful news for chronic pain patients wanting some relief. There are quite a few devices that you could use to smoke concentrates and I will detail them below.

Kief in the bottom of a grinder.

Consuming Concentrates...

The most important pieces of advice I can give

...the healthiest pieces of advice...

are to always smoke out of a water filtration device

and to smoke concentrates cautiously

until you're an experienced consumer!

Penguin Dabber by Chaka Glass

Hash has gotten quite a bad rap since most people associate hash as being a harsher drug when, in reality, it is merely marijuana cooked down. Hash is stronger because the kief (holds most of the trichomes) in the marijuana is used to make it. Dabs, also known as earwax, wax, or shatter, is a form of hash oil that has been cooked into a fine, see through sheet of concentrated liquid which dries hard.

Storing resin in a glass jar is a healthier option.

Another type of concentrate is resin. I would just like to say that I adore resin. I think it's pretty awesome that, after smoking the dry herb, that it is converted into a resin that can be smoked by itself. It is in between the consistency of a gooey dab and a cannabis oil. It is thick and, when smoked, is very potent in odor. There are two very important reasons why I adore resin. One is the fact that it's basically recycled weed because the dry herb got me high and then there's still this left over to smoke! And, two, is that the concentrated resin will get you higher than dry herb and it is extremely potent for chronic pain patients. Collect resin whenever your bong stem gets full into a glass jar and store with the lid screwed on tight to prevent the resin from drying and becoming hard.

Cannabis Oil

A third type of concentrate, and the most important, is Cannabis Oil (also known as Hemp Oil). Cannabis Oil is what everyone talks about when they discuss what cures cancer. When making cannabis oil, the plant is cooked down into a food grade solvent and then it is ingested or smoked for various ailments. This oil is not easy to come by in illegal states or Colorado. Colorado has some sort of law that says that regular people can't get their oil tested and it's causing medical marijuana patients to have difficulty acquiring this very important medicine. It is when the whole plant is ingested that true internal healing and curing can begin. For our purposes here I will be showing you how to smoke it, but in future posts I will be going into further detail about ingesting it.

There are many types of devices to smoke concentrates and I will list them by their ease of use and tell you how to use the device.

The Pipe*
...glass water pipe or bong is recommended
Recommended for the Intermediate or Experienced Cannabis Consumer

$75 on Artfire

Fill your bowl with dry herb and pick up your dab or resin with your dabber. Place the dab into the marijuana and roll it into the herb. Light and smoke it. Be advised that this is a more pungent smoke. You will need incense even if you think you won't!

A Different Method of How to Use a Pipe to Smoke Concentrates Video.

The Vape Pen*
...for concentrates or cannabis oil
Recommended for the Intermediate or Experienced Cannabis Consumer

I love vape pens! They are so easy to use, they hardly smell when used, and you can use resin, cannabis oil or dabs in this handy vape pen. I have a bubble vaporizer attachment that I use on an old Amazing Vaporizer. A couple of puffs and I'm in heaven! I especially love it for the times when I find it difficult to smoke because I cough very little when smoking out of this device!

How to Use a Vape Pen Video.

The Recycler
Recommended for the Experienced Cannabis Consumer

For dabs, resin, or cannabis oil consumption.

Concentrates with the names of earwax, wax or shatter are all forms of hash most commonly called dabs. Dabs have taken Colorado and the nation by storm. They are a more concentrated version of marijuana, so they should be smoked with caution. I recommend a puff or two or a pin like size dab on your dab nail or dabber for your first time because just those couple of puffs will get an experienced dry herb smoker really, really stoned.

How to Use a Recycler Video.

Smoking dry herb or concentrates are really easy once you get into it. Instagram is a really great learning tool for anyone wanting to learn more. Just search '#dabs' and you'll come up with a wealth of knowledge and videos on how to use all the up to date devices. If you come across CoralReefer420, tell her I said hi!

Whatever device you use to smoke concentrates is of little importance. The most important thing is that you find relief from your illness and its symptoms!!

Stay tuned for a post on edibles! YUM!!!

*Home concentrate consumption is advised, but driving with concentrates is not. Most illegal states have laws with harsher fines and jail time. In Texas one can face a lifetime in prison for possession of concentrates.

This has been a post from "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis".

Follow CC's Short-term Cannabis Oil Research & Study for a personal account.
If you're a patient in Texas, please view this information about how you can help legalize!

Dry Herb Smoking | 7 of 31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Tue, 07 Oct 2014 15:53:00 +0000

Now that we've discussed The Endocannabinoid System and how cannabis is the key to unlocking that system, then we can move onto the fun part - Consuming Cannabis! Cannabis can be consumed by smoking or ingesting. This post will discuss the most popular and quickest way to consume cannabis--smoking!

It can be challenging to for new patients to avoid overmedication, since many of the tools --like bongs and vaporizers-- don't come with many instructions on how to use them or how to have a controlled dosage, so I've gathered some info on my favorite consumption devices.

Consuming Dry Herb...

The most important piece of advice I can give
...the healthiest piece of advice...
is to always smoke out of a
water filtration device.

The Pipe

Recommended for the Beginner, Intermediate, or Experienced Medical Marijuana Consumer

Glass Bubbler is in-between a pipe and a bong.

Finding the right dosage is pretty simple. You just start by consuming a small amount and work up to an amount that is pleasurable to you and that is effective against your health symptoms. For example, if you've never smoked before then I recommend that you smoke out a pipe for the first time. I recommend a "bubbler" like the one pictured above. It is a water pipe, not a water bong.

"Just a little bit" is a saying that goes a long way for your first time consuming cannabis. I recommend taking two puffs and waiting for 15-30 minutes to see how you feel before consuming more on your first time.

How To Smoke a Pipe Video.

The Dry Herb Vaporizer Pen

Recommended for the Beginner, Intermediate, or Experienced Medical Marijuana Consumer

Smoking out of this vaporizer is good for on the go, but smoking out of glass is healthier.

When you're a medical marijuana patient the best thing you can do for yourself is to buy one of these pens. This is the most important smoking device for anyone on the go. Vaporizers work by heating dry herb or concentrates to a temperature at which the active ingredients boil off and form an inhalable vapor, but below the temperature at which these ingredients approach precombustion or combustion. It's important to note that these are relatively new devices and it is easy to purchase a cheaper one and give up because they don't work. You'll need to purchase one in the $150-250 range for it to work properly and for a long duration of time.

How to use a dry herb vaporizer.

I highly recommend the dry herb pen over a concentrate pen (I will be covering concentrates in a future post) for those that live in illegal states. Some states have stricter laws for concentrates and in those instances concentrates are only recommended for in home use.

The Joint

Recommended for the Intermediate or Experienced Medical Marijuana Consumer

A joint is a cheap way to smoke, but smoking out of glass is much healthier.

I recommend a joint for two plus persons because a joint is a lot to smoke at one time for one person, however a couple of puffs on this is possible and you can put it out carefully by just snuffing out the flame. For a joint you will need papers, a grinder, and enough cannabis to fill it. You will grind your medical marijuana and place it in the center of the paper and then roll it up using this technique by Eg0re!

How to Roll a Joint Video.

*Metal grinder is a Healthy choice.

The Bong (Ask for "Water Pipe" in Head Shops)

Recommended for the Intermediate, or Experienced Medical Marijuana Consumer

*Glass is a Healthy choice! Use Everclear and epsom salts to clean.

For many smokers, the bong is a personal accessory that is highly sought after for it's design and function. Bongs, or the preferred term of "water pipes" at marijuana paraphernalia shops, are beautiful pieces of glass that are used to consume larger amounts of cannabis. If you are having a bad pain day, then a bong hit is what you'll need. You fill the the bong full of clean, fluoride free water and small chips of ice and you fill the bowl with weed. You will light the bowl and inhale it at the same time. The amount of smoke that comes out depends on how hard you suck, so it's really easy for a newbie to suck in too much smoke. I've found that the easiest way to control that is to suck slowly while lighting the bowl and pull the bowl out of the bong quickly (this stops the marijuana from smoking more) to suck in all the air at one time. If you leave smoke in the bowl and suck it out afterwards, then it will make you cough hard.

How to Smoke a Bong Video.

The Volcano Vaporizer

Recommended for the Experienced Medical Marijuana Consumer

A volcano is not easy to come by, but it can be purchased at some of the nicer head (paraphernalia) shops, but it can be cheaper to find online. I just recently tried a volcano vaporizer for the first time and I loved it. I could taste the delicate flavors of the marijuana and I didn't cough at all (I'm a hacker usually). I appreciated the fact that I could smoke very easily with this device!

The way it works is that you insert the herb into the top middle. You lock the bag into place, turn on the machine and watch the bag fill with the vapor. It is then smoked through the tube and passed around like a joint at parties. The bags that come with it can be reused a lot of times.

How to use The Volcano Vaporizer Video.

Stay tuned for more posts about edibles, oil, and concentrates!

This has been a post from "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis".

Follow CC's Short-term Cannabis Oil Research & Study for a personal account.
If you're a patient in Texas, please view this information about how you can help legalize!

The Right Cannabis Strain for YOU | 6 of 31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Mon, 06 Oct 2014 13:10:00 +0000

Marijuana Plants

Before you can consume cannabis, you need to find the right strain that works for your ailment. There are two different strains, Indica and Sativa, and there is a hybrid which is a combination of the two with one being more dominant than the other. Indica is a short and fat, broad leaved plant that promotes rest, relaxation, and pain relief. Sativa is a narrow, tall leaved plant that increases alertness and energy. It is really all about what works best with your body and ailment. Hybrids are a combo of sativa and indica, so they can be highly sought after like the prized Blue Dream.

The Indica variety of marijuana tends to grow short and bushy, with wide/fat leaves. The buds produced by Indica plants tend to cause a more heavy and relaxing effect, known as a "body high", and can cause people to feel "couchlocked."

Indica plants tend to be well-suited to grow indoors because of their shape and Indica buds are especially suited to relieve insomnia, muscle tension, nausea, lack of appetite, anxiety, body pain, and depression.

The buds from a Sativa plant cause more of an "in your head" high, sometimes psychedelic, sparking creativity, uplifting your mood, and even can be energizing for some people. Sativa varieties of marijuana are often better suited to growing outdoors as they can grow to 20 feet or more in height. While an indoor grower can use growth control methods to control the height and shape of the plant, a full Sativa can be tough for an indoor grower with limited space. Therefore, many indoor growers who love the Sativa effects will opt for a hybrid that carries the same bud properties, but has been bred to be easier for indoor growing.

Well-loved by artists, Sativas are especially suited to relieve depression, migraines and certain types of pain, while being more "day-friendly" and energizing than many pure Indicas. [Source]

Sativa = Higher THC levels

Check out this handy Medical Marijuana Strain Review created by patients that lists the ailment first and the strain second!

These handy charts will help, but I highly recommend using Leafly's app on a regular basis. Even if you're in an illegal state, medical grade cannabis should still be available to you and you can make a good buy as long as you know what kind of strain you're buying. Some patients ask me how to find it in their area. Because it's illegal you're going to have to know a guy who knows a guy. You can't know if what you're getting is truly medical grade, but since I've been educated about what marijuana looks and smells like then I have a bit more of an expertise than the usual Medical Jane.

One good piece of advice is to keep your cannabis in a brown colored jar. I make homemade bread so I used a leftover yeast jar. It's a large size and, because it's a dark brown glass, it stays fresher longer. The jars are easy to find in the grocery store and cost at most $3. Sounds like a cheap and wonderful marijuana jar is waiting on Aisle 6, huh? ;p

This has been a post from "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis".

Follow CC's Short-term Cannabis Oil Research & Study for a personal account.
If you're a patient in Texas, please view this information about how you can help legalize!

Cannabis & The Endocannanoid System | 5 of 31 Days to Free Your Mindabout Cannabis

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Sun, 05 Oct 2014 18:52:00 +0000

A good friend of mine got me "Cannabis Pharmacy: The Practical Guide to Medical Marijuana" to read about cannabis and I found a ton of information that I want to share with you about what medical conditions cannabis alleviates and all the information you need to know if you're a medical marijuana newbie!

Medical marijuana benefits the following illnesses, but not limited to:

Alzheimer's Disease
Anxiety Disorders
Arthritis
Asthma
ADHD
Autism Spectrum Disorders
Autoimmune Disorders
Cachexia and Appetite Disorders
Cancer
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
Diabetes
Fibromyalgia
Gastrointestinal Disorders
Gerontology
Glaucoma
Hepatitis C
HIV/AIDS
Insomnia and Sleep Disorders (including Sleep Apnea)
Migraine and Headache
Multiple Sclerosis and Movement Disorders
Nausea and Vomiting
Neuropathy
Pain
Parkinson's Disease
Post-traumatic Stress Disorder
Schizophrenia
Seizure Disorders
Skin Conditions
Stress

Due to the fact that today's physicians are not taught that cannabis can be an effective medicine medical marijuana patients typically know more about what cannabis can or can't help. The problem stems from the difficulty of conducting peer-reviewed medical research on the medical uses of cannabis when the primary US government agency supervising that research is dedicated to the proposition that cannabis is a dangerous drug of abuse with no accepted medical use. However, this situation is changing with 23 legal states and more to come this next election season.

We do know how cannabis works in the body and there is much research being done on the endocannabanoid system in our body that mimics the chemicals in marijuana. In order to understand medical marijuana and how it can be beneficial for your health, it's good to understand the endocannbanoid system.

The endocannabinoid system consists of a network of endocannabinoid receptors, which are distributed throughout the body. They system is a very complex regulatory system, board in its function, and found within all complex animals, from fish to humans. The endocannabinoid system supports such diverse functions as memory, digestion, motor function, immune response, appetite, pain, blood pressure, bone growth, and the protection of neural tissues. Many researchers believe that there are even more physiological processes with which the enocannabinoid system is involved, still yet to be discovered.

The two primary subtypes of cannabinoid receptor in the enodcannbinoid system are CB1 and CB2. These receptors are distributed throughout the entrap nervous and immune systems, and within many other tissues, including the brain, gastrointestinal system, reproductive and urinary tracts, spleen, endocrine system, heart and circulatory system. Furthermore, researchers have uncovered new evidence that points to at least three other cannabinoid receptors throughout the body, in addition to CB1 and CB2.

Endocannabinoids serve as the primary messenger across synapses (the gaps between nerve cells. They signal neurons to communicate with each other through the release of neurotransmitters, keeping our nervous system running smoothly. Endocannabinoids are produced on demand, released back across the synapse, then taken into the cells and rapidly metabolized. They appear to be profoundly connected with the concept of homeostasis, helping redress specific imbalances presented by disease or injury. Their role in pain signaling has lead to the hypothesis that endocannabinoid levels may be responsible for the baseline of pain throughout the body. This could mean that the constant release of the body's own endocannabinoids could have a tonic effect on muscle tightness in multiple sclerosis, neuropathic pain, inflammation and even baseline appetite.

The CB1 receptor is expressed throughout the brain, where endocannabinoids and CB1 combine to form a circuit breaker, which modulates the release of neurotransmitters. The brain functions affected by the endocannabinoid system are decision making, cognition, emotions, learning, memory, regulation of body movement, anxiety, stress, fear, pain, body temperature, appetite, reward center, motor control and much more. The brain stem is one region where the CB1 receptors don't work and that's the area in control of respiration and circulation which is why cannabis overdoses are not fatal. One thing to note here is that the CB1 receptor that is responsible for modulating neurotransmitters is also the one that is responsible for the psychoactive effects of cannabis.

The CB2 receptors control the release of cytokines (immunoregulatory proteins) linked to inflammation and general immune function throughout the body.

Watch "The Endocannabinoid System" Video.

While there are over 100 cannabanoids, they can be categorized into 10 different types with these being the primary forms.

THC (tetrahydrocannabinol) is the primary psychoactive constituent of cannabis and interacts with both the CB1 and CB2 endocannabinoid receptors.
CBD (cannabidiolic acid) is mildly psychoactive and is produced mainly from hemp.
CBG (cannabigerol) is an analgesic non-psychoactive cannabinoid with antiseptic, antibiotic, and anti-tumor agents.
CBC (cannabichromenic acid) has anti-depressant, antibiotic and anti fungal properties.
CBN (oxidation byproduct of THC) is not found in the cannabis plant, but in resin or oil.

When the cannabis is heated and consumed, the endocannabinoid receptors are activated. Now that you understand the complexities of how the endocannbanoid system and medical marijuana works together, our next step to understand how it can help YOU is to help you understand how to consume it.

This has been a post from "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis".

Follow CC's Short-term Cannabis Oil Research & Study for a personal account.
If you're a patient in Texas, please view this information about how you can help legalize!

Cannabis Safer than Alcohol and Prescription Medications | 4 of 31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Sat, 04 Oct 2014 17:23:00 +0000

For those of us that suffer from disease we can walk into any doctors office and leave with a multitude of medications. Anything we want we can attain. One can get benzos and ambien from PCPs and, if you have something more pressing, you can get some major opioids or pain pills from pain management offices.

I took a look at the CDC's website and found some very, very disturbing statistics that made the above one pale in comparison. 74% of all overdoses are due to opioids and 30% are due to benzodiazepines. Most overdoses had a combination of the two. Opioids are prescribed for pain and benzodiazepines are prescribed for anxiety, so therefore the two leading causes of injury death are due to pain and anxiety.

According to Washington Post marijuana there are more trips to the emergency room for prescription medications or alcohol than marijuana, making marijuana safer to consume than prescriptions or alcohol.

According to the National Institute on Drug Abuse, marijuana is the leading drug for illicit teenage use and is followed second by prescriptions. If we legalize marijuana then that will make it necessary for a driver's license to be used to purchase marijuana at a dispensary just as needed for alcohol or narcotic prescriptions, therefore making it as difficult to attain as alcohol or prescriptions.

Marijuana has been proven by studies to be safer to consume. Since the two leading causing prescriptions are written for pain and/or anxiety it is safe to advise that our society would benefit more from the legalization of marijuana than the continued use of alcohol and prescriptions that cause such a high incidence of death.

This has been a post from "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis".

Follow CC's Short-term Cannabis Oil Research & Study for a personal account.
If you're a patient in Texas, please view this information about how you can help legalize!

What is Cannabis Oil? | 3 of 31 Days to Free Your Mind About Cannabis

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Sat, 04 Oct 2014 01:56:00 +0000

My quest for answers about my neurological disorder led me to cannabis oil. As many of you may or may not know, I'm an activist for marijuana reform in Texas. It's been a passion of mine for a little while now. I became a believer when I sought something more natural to help me with pain. I've been smoking it for the past year for medicinal purposes. It's amazing for pain relief and I don't feel as unhealthy as I did while I on Vicodin.

While doing research on Parkinson's, I came across cannabis medical studies on a regular basis. These studies are about patients not only smoking it, but ingesting cannabis oil. The entire marijuana plant, using alcohol as a solvent, is cooked down into a thick resinous oil. When ingested in this manner marijuana becomes a formidable and powerful medicine.

"Run From The Cure" has a bunch of important patient testimonials and it explains what the oil is and how it is made. It's important to understand this so that you can understand how it heals the body.

"Run From the Cure" was the very first movie I ever watched about cannabis oil. I had heard of cannabis oil, but I didn't really know what it was. Dr. Sanjay Gupta's Weed episode touches on the topic briefly, but I wanted to share this video because it's the most important video that anyone with a debilitating disease can watch.

Cannabis oil is the entire plant cooked down using a solvent (I suggest Everclear, not rubbing alcohol as it's less toxic) and then the patient ingests the oil. This oil is highly potent and it is what everyone is talking about. This is what cures cancer and a multitude of other debilitating diseases. If cannabis can't cure it, it can sure make your quality of life way more enjoyable!

Please watch this video and share it with your friends. Education is key to solving our health problems!

Cannabis Oil can cure a multitude of ailments. This is a short list!

This has been a post from "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis".

Follow CC's Short-term Cannabis Oil Research & Study for a personal account.
If you're a patient in Texas, please view this information about how you can help legalize!

Dr. Sanjay Gupta's Public Apology about Cannabis | 2 of 31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Thu, 02 Oct 2014 21:31:00 +0000

I have always been a Sanjay Gupta fan. I've been posting about him since my infancy as "Bipolar Chica". When I came across his CNN segment, Weed, I was intrigued. I didn't even know that he was against marijuana until that point. I watched the hour long documentary in surprise. I had no idea that marijuana had so very many, many health benefits!

After watching his first documentary I had to find out more about him and I did find out ever so much more about marijuana and I began to equate Dr. Gupta as my own personal marijuana doctor/guru. I followed what he said and researched everything and found that he is extremely factual. Please watch the following segments.

Dr. Sanjay Gupta's Apology to Americans for his beliefs about Weed

Dr. Sanjay Gupta's CNN documentary, "Weed", 43 min.
(Choose between 16 min. or 43 min. versions)

Dr. Sanjay Gupta's CNN documentary, "Weed", 16 min.
(Choose between 16 min. or 43 min. versions)

Dr. Sanjay Gupta's CNN documentary, "Weed 2", 43 min.

If Dr. Gupta can admit his misconceptions, then so can the rest of the medical system!

This has been fun! See you tomorrow, folks!
:D

This has been a post from "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis".

Follow CC's Short-term Cannabis Oil Research & Study for a personal account.
If you're a patient in Texas, please view this information about how you can help legalize!

How Cannabis Became Illegal | 1 of 31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Wed, 01 Oct 2014 16:03:00 +0000

When Henry Ford invented the first automobile to run on hemp, he didn't know that it would create a 75 year marijuana (also known as hemp, hash, cannabis, or marihuana) prohibition. The entire car was made out of hemp and it ran on hemp fuel. The technology was way ahead of it's time! It was truly wonderful because hemp can be grown easily and quickly. It really will answer a lot of environmental questions now that it's being grown in the United States again.

I mention Ford's Model T because that innovation got some tongues wagging. Andrew Mellon, Hoover's Secretary of Treasury, was the primary financial support for DuPont, a company heavy into chemical, fossil fuel and paper manufacturing, and he was concerned that hemp would interfere with his investment. Paper made out of hemp doesn't turn brown, but the paper they were producing needed extra chemicals to keep it white and Mellon wanted to continue to turn a profit, so he joined forces with William Randolph Hearst, producer of several publications in NY and CA. Together they used yellow journalism and sold Reefer Madness to the public. Racism and business fueled Reefer Madness with words like,

“Marihuana influences Negroes to look at white people in the eye, step on white men’s shadows, and look at a white woman twice.”

In 1932, the Federal Bureau of Narcotics was created under the US Department of Treasury (notice the correlation?). Mellon appointed his niece's husband, Harry J. Anslinger as the chief of the agency.

When he testified before congress he had this to say,

“Marijuana is the most violence causing drug in the history of mankind…Most marijuana smokers are Negroes, Hispanics, Filipinos and entertainers. Their Satanic music, jazz and swing, result from marijuana usage. This marijuana causes white women to seek sexual relations with Negroes.”

Within two years, Anslinger drafted the "Marihuana Tax Act of 1937" which was disguised as a tax revenue bill. Since the bill was introduced into the House and Ways Committee that meant that it didn't have to be debated. It didn't hurt that the chairman of the committee was Robert Doughton nor that the member of the Senate Finance Committee to stamp it into law were both DuPont allies.

The American Medical Association (AMA) was opposed to the law because taxing meant that they had to pay those taxes and the doctors didn't want to lose money. They said that they didn't know that this bill was about 'cannabis' as it had been put under the term, 'marihuana'. Marihuana was a word only used by Mexicans at that time (hemp was the name known by society) so it was largely misunderstood. The AMA argued that if the name had been something that they had known then they would've fought the legislation.

In 1969, Leary v. United States, found that the Marihuana Tax Act of 1937 violated our 5th amendment by requiring people to incriminate themselves when paying the tax. In 1970, Congress passed the Controlled Substances Act as Title II of the Comprehensive Drug Abuse Prevention and Control Act. This act required all doctors to keep track of strict security and records. It classified drugs into five categories with marijuana being in the Schedule 1 category with meth, heroin and cocaine due to potential abuse. Remember that the AMA fought the Marihuana Tax Act because they thought it was a viable medication and they didn't want to pay taxes?

In 1974, the US government became aware that cannabis could cure cancer, but they did not legalize marijuana nor did they tell any citizens about their miraculous discovery. Cancer is a 95.5 billion dollar per year industry. Pharmaceutical companies and the entire medical industry is reaping the benefits of marijuana prohibition. There is little benefit to corporations if marijuana is re-legalized because they won't make as much money off of a natural plant that can be homegrown and produced by the common man and not a high tech pharmacist.

Big Pharma is definitely benefiting monetarily from the prohibition of marijuana. With the inclusion of genetically modified organisms in the 1980's in the American diet, people are becoming severely ill with gastrointestinal and neurological disorders (to name a couple) due to the EPA increasing the amount of allowable pesticides by 3000%. There are so many diseases that cannabis cures and helps that it can be deemed a medicine for all (see my next post about medicinal benefits of the cannabis plant.)

In 1999, the United States government applied for and received a patent on cannabinoids (cannabis). The government is fully aware that there are many European studies that solidify that marijuana does have medical benefits. The patent states,

"Cannabinoids have been found to have antioxidant properties, unrelated to NMDA receptor antagonism. This new found property makes cannabinoids useful in the treatment and prophylaxis of wide variety of oxidation associated diseases, such as ischemic, age-related, inflammatory and autoimmune diseases. The cannabinoids are found to have particular application as neuroprotectants, for example in limiting neurological damage following ischemic insults, such as stroke and trauma, or in the treatment of neurodegenerative diseases, such as Alzheimer's disease, Parkinson's disease and HIV dementia. Nonpsychoactive cannabinoids, such as cannabidoil, are particularly advantageous to use because they avoid toxicity that is encountered with psychoactive cannabinoids at high doses useful in the method of the present invention. A particular disclosed class of cannabinoids useful as neuroprotective antioxidants is formula (I) wherein the R group is independently selected from the group consisting of H, CH₃, and COCH₃."

The facts are clear. Big Pharma wants to be the one to produce and profit off of the legalization of marijuana. I'm beginning to wonder if whoever is heading up DuPont now still has a stake in all this due to the immersion of news that the government would like to legalize CBD oil only. Despite all of the heavy handed dirty tactics from the United States government, the American people are waking up the medicinal benefits of the 'all-natural' mighty powerful medicinal qualities of cannabis! Over 23 states have some form of legalization and two states have legalized recreational use of marijuana. Several more states such as Florida, Oregon and Pennsylvania are putting legalization on their ballots this November. I believe the entire country will soon have some form of legalization by the year 2020. That's wonderful news for all American patients and means that soon we will all have the right to choose between a 'plant derivitive + chemicals' with multiple harmful side effects or an 'natural plant derivative' without any harmful side effects.

This has been a post from "31 Days to Free Your Mind about Cannabis".

Follow CC's Short-term Cannabis Oil Research & Study for a personal account.
If you're a patient in Texas, please view this information about how you can help legalize!

Doctor Notes | A Medical Diagnosis of Psychogenic Movement Disorder

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Wed, 01 Oct 2014 03:21:00 +0000

Texas Medical Center

Catch up on my story here!

We awoke super early to travel four hours to go to Houston for a last minute doctor's appointment with the best neurologist in Texas. We packed all my pillows and electrical devices and headed out the door. I was a nervous wreck.

I did my best to stay calm. I smoked a lot of our delicious, medicinal quality Berry White because I didn't want to take my cannabis oil so that my tremors and tics would come out for my medical examination. We got there just in time to have lunch at Chipotle and eat a lunch out door listening to a disabled man play jazz on his horn. I ate a taco and a half and then threw the rest away. I was too nervous to eat.

A disabled man plays a little jazz for money on a street corner.

We were in the middle of the Texas Medical Center which is huge with very tall buildings and lots of pedestrians and traffic. We had a bit of a difficulty finding where we needed to go. We entered in at the address given and then had to take the elevator up the crosswalk, walk into another high rise building and then we took the elevator up eighteen more floors. When we got off the elevator we walked straight up to the reception desk. Apparently this doctor was making enough money to afford to rent the entire floor of offices. The waiting room was large enough to fit 100 people more than comfortably. The chairs were plush and we sank into them as we waited. I momentarily thought about how much money all of this took to accomplish and how Big Pharma was making a killing off of this doctor.

We were efficiently ushered into the back offices by the nurses that took my weight measurements and checked my blood pressure. They were all up in arms about how my blood pressure would not read electronically. I told them that a manual one was needed as this always happens, but they insisted so that made me so nervous that, when they finally got a reading, my blood pressure was through the roof. It should've alerted me that all of that drama was merely 'forecasting' for the rest of the appointment.

We waited for five to ten minutes in their gigantic waiting room once again before an Indian doctor came out to greet us and took us back into her office. The large picture window captured my attention. The view was spectacular. I tried to make small talk with the doctor about the glorious view, but she said she didn't even look at the view (I began to think about why I would go to a doctor that didn't even appreciate this incredible view!), pushed my small talk aside and got to my medical history. During questions of when my symptoms first began (and all those tedious questions I have to answer every single time I go to doctors) I started to become extremely annoyed. I wasn't sure how much she was paying attention, but she repeated everything back to me accurately. After an hour we were sent to the waiting room again to wait to see Dr. Jankovic.

Dr. Jankovic is supposed to be the best neurologist in Texas. He has written many, many books on movement disorders and I was interested in seeing him because of it. We waited about twenty minutes before we saw him. He was short man with glasses and had a balding head with tufts of shocking white hair against his tan skin. He had kind eyes and was quiet as his assistant told him about my symptoms. He watched me as he listened to her. My body was acting up just a little bit, but not as much as it has in the past. I still had some neck tics and tremors. He began our discussion by asking me what tests I thought that I needed to have next. I told him that I thought that a Huntington's DNA test was in order and he agreed. After speaking with me a bit about what I was most concerned about (my short term memory loss, bad concentration skills, and forgetting words) he proceeded to tell me that he thought that my movement disorder was psychogenic, not Huntington's or Parkinson's Diseases.

My eyes grew big in amazement as he spoke. He said that he thought that stress was what was causing my movements. I grew quieter and quieter. This was the very best doctor in Texas and he was basically telling me that I was crazy. I waited until he left and then tears ran down my cheeks. I had been waiting for so long to hear something, to know something and this is all I had to show for it now. I was very distraught. This was the second time in two weeks that I had heard this same thing. I had just seen Dr. Verona at the Austin Neurological Clinic and his diagnosis was also psychogenic. In less than two weeks I had TWO neurologists tell me that all of this illness is all in my head! Haha! Of course it's in my head! It's neurological, BUT I'm not ready to throw in the towel and jump on the crazy train because I'm NOT crazy!!

This is not stress. This is REAL and it's GENETIC. My sister and I have extremely similar symptoms. My mom falls all the time, has horrible short term memory loss and cognitive problems. You can't tell me that stress is making us all sick. Basically, this doctor is just like every other doctor out there. He doesn't know anything so he blankets it with the term 'Psychogenic Movement Disorder'. The only thing crazy here is that western medicine cannot keep up with the increasing undiagnosed disorders out there. I've found so many undiagnosed neurological patients in my research and it's just crazy to say that we're all crazy!

After crying for a few minutes my tears dried up. I was not going to cry about this anymore! I am pretty okay. I'm good. I know I'm not wonderful, but I'm okay. I know my illness is progressing, but I do have a treatment plan that I've developed and I'm going to keep going. That is my purpose and that is the plan and I'm sticking to it.

Once I calmed down a bit further I realized that I had gotten exactly what I came for! I didn't hold much hope that this neurologist would be able to give me a diagnosis, but I did get the Huntington's DNA test, (that will definitively answer whether or not we have that and that's the scariest thing my sister and I could have) so I'm glad I got my blood drawn for that test before we even left the fancy office. The test results will be available in 6-8 weeks.

Bill and I left the office hand in hand and we were going to drive home, but decided to stay and have a date night in Houston. Bill was so great the entire day. He got off of work at the last minute so we could go. He spoke up during the doctor's office. He was my champion and I gazed at him as we drove down the freeway. I just wanted to spend more time with him and only him, so we put down our phones and spent the night lost in each other. We ate a lovely meal and watched a hilarious comedy in a mostly empty theater where our laughter rang loud and free. All in all it wasn't too shabby of a trip at all! I got what I wanted. I hope Huntington's is not what my sister and I have, but you know what I've decided? I'm DONE with all western medicine and it's uneducated doctors! Answers are overrated. Solutions are not!!!

I know there are many that are outraged at the medical system on my behalf. I think it's very sweet and wonderful that so many people have taken me into their hearts, but it is time to let go of the notion that only western medicine can help me. I have much still to discover, but eastern, holistic, and cannabis medicine are treatments I know will help me. I may never be cured of this neurological disorder, but I will do all I can to ease my symptoms and have a good quality of life. Do not cry for me, my friends! I am well, I am happy, and I am passionate about life. I am going to heal my life. I am at peace!

Doctor Notes | My EEG at Austin Neurological Clinic

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Thu, 25 Sep 2014 05:57:00 +0000

This afternoon I had an EEG scheduled. I was not a happy camper. I admit that I absolutely detest all medical buildings and the people that inhabit them. Just thinking about going to one puts me in a horrible state of anxiety. Shout the word "Hospital!", and I'm bound to bolt out the door before the "p" sound creates the natural lisp sound in the word. When you've been to as many doctors as I have you tend to notice that most medical personnel are simply smart sheep. It sounds like an oxymoron, but let me assure you that it's possible to both be someone that is complacent and someone that is smart.

But, I digress. On my way to the EEG room I snagged a 'Neurology Now' magazine. I'm always on the lookout for information and when I see a free magazine like this one I take it so I can examine it later for sources.

A portly man with a mousy brown comb over escorted me to the cluttered and slightly unseemly exam room with a cheap mirror bolted to the wall with plastic hooks and yellow fluorescent lights that instantly offended my eyes. He asked me to sit in a leather backed chair which was located next to a box of wires that were meant for my head. He began attaching them and the glue's chemical composition changed the entire smell of the room. My eyes began to water and I coughed. He paid me no mind and continued to apply the glue and attach a wire. I asked him to open a door and ignored me so I asked him again. He impatiently cracked open a door and continued with what he was doing. Bill had followed me into the room, but I told him to go sit out in the waiting room where he wouldn't get chemical poisoning. Yes, the odor and fumes were that bad.

My head pounded, the wires were attached and he asked me to lay down and covered me with a sheet. I was told I could lay on my stomach or my side or however I was comfortable as long as I closed my eyes. I lay as still as I could. It was uncomfortable laying there. I couldn't find a comfortable place for my arm or my hand. My back was doing that movement thing again and my right shoulder and hand weren't cooperating either. I was in pain, too, so that didn't help either. I actually wanted to go to sleep just so I could do something since I was bored sitting there without anything to do but sleep. Just as I was drifting off to sleep he woke me and told me to lie on my back. Then the strobe lights started. Omigawd, they hurt like a bitch. I am extremely sensitive to light. I thought I was going to start crying, but I didn't. I did, however, have convulsions. When it was over I slowly walked to the waiting room to meet Bill. I was exhausted and my head hurt and I felt like I was going to throw up.

Bill got me a sparkling water and I looked at the Neurology Now* magazine I had picked up in the doctor's office. On the front cover the words, "Does medical marijuana ease neurologic symptoms?" popped out at me.

Omigoodness! I didn't even read the magazine when I picked it up! What a happy, happy gift from the universe! The article discusses the promise of medical marijuana and a highly respectable neuropsychiatrist from a respectable university (I can't remember which one right now) states that marijuana shows much promise and there is much need for independent neurological research studies! I know it's not a coop, but it's a step in the right direction and that makes me KNOW that I'm doing the right thing. In my heart (and that's what's taking over these days) I KNOW that I am going to have a way better quality of life than anyone that chooses the ineffective, yet dangerous yellow pill road.

It's good to feel the certainty that I now feel. And it's good to remember that EVERYTHING happens for a reason. It gives me a little more peace to know that my journey will not just be a bit more secure, but my step will be light as well!

*Neurology Now articles are available for free online and for your iPad. See the above link.

10/1/2014 EDIT: I received notice that my EEG was completely normal.

Treatment Plan | THE Original Treatment Plan includes Mind Powerful Meditation

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 05:11:00 +0000

Read the first post about My Original Treatment Plan

I haven't blogged or written much about my symptoms lately. I've been taking a mental break from it all. I think I've been getting so caught up in trying to document every single little itty, bitty thing that I've missed the big picture.

I've been enjoying my children. It's been semi-sweet thinking that I might leave them to go to another state as a medical marijuana refugee. My children are young and impressionable and they desperately need me and I need them. I don't want to leave them, so when I see them I hug on them extra tight and smile extra big. They make me so happy! They are so beautiful inside and out and I'm a proud mother. :)

My cornerstone, my rock, my everything has been Bill. He has been here with me from the beginning. It was shaky between us at first. We didn't know how we were going to deal with whatever disease I had together. He wasn't sure that he could take care of me if it came down to it. It has come down to it and it's working beautifully. He holds my hand when I need it, gets my ass up when it needs to be, motivates me to be doing something that makes me happy. He watches me silently and he is noticing my symptoms. He's my extra pair of eyes. He is not a passive observer in my life. He's an active partner to me in every way. He always has my back. I can always count on him and I trust him like none other. I'm a lucky, lucky woman and I count my lucky stars every single minute, no...every single second of the day for him.

But it is his urging that makes me document this when I really don't want to...

My arms H U R T. They fucking hurt. They won't fucking stop hurting. i just want them to fucking stop hurting. why the fuck do they hurt????????????????????

Deep breath. Wipe tears.
Another one.
Wipe again.

The tremors are coming back just a little bit, but not a lot. The wrist is starting to bend again, but not a lot. The pain was getting better, but today it's worse. Those are my physical symptoms.

Writing this has made me cry, but the rest of the day was beautiful. I had a very nice day with my sleeping prince. Bill really does make all of this so much more bearable. I do enjoy my life. I do enjoy the work that I'm doing to help legalize marijuana. It is remarkable and very rewarding work.

This morning we were having breakfast and I happened across a faux report stating that Texas had legalized marijuana. I didn't know it was fake. I read it once. My heart was beating quickly. I read it twice. Tears started streaming down my cheeks. Bill joined me and he asked me if it was true. I said that I didn't know, but wouldn't it be fucking awesome?!? We smiled largely at each other through our tears. And then we found out it was fake.

So, because my arms hurt and I can't yell at them, I'm going to yell at Snope. YOU MOTHER FUCKING BASTARDS!!!! We have sick children that are separating and migrating away from their parents just to have a better quality of life! Please don't make this worse for them and for the rest of us waiting in dire need! Please have hearts!

The reward hasn't come yet obviously. Texas has not legalized marijuana through some miraculous bill. I mean I thought it was fishy to read that Perry was doing it. Wasn't he indicted? Wouldn't that mean this power is suspended or something? Anyway, the reward is coming. It will be here soon. I believe that medical marijuana will come to Texas and I'm going to fight for it until it does.

(That was important to note, but what's more important to get back to is my original thought. I had to reread what I had just written to get it. It's a memory thing that I'm dealing with. We'll have to get used to it together as reader and writer...)

The big picture...There's a bigger picture here than just my symptoms and Bill and me. There's the universe. Somehow it's brought all this together.... Every single piece of it is as it should be...for whatever reason that has yet to be revealed. I trudge on in positivity usually, but lately I'm floating around. My love for Bill and his for me is radiating between us and I'm channeling it again in my chest. I feel it floating there like a ball of fire. I'm channeling it into my arms. I feel the energy pulsate down my shoulder through my elbows and down through my fingers. I'm getting back to my original plan. I'm getting back to this plan of healing myself with the sheer will power of my mind and I'm going to do it with the love that I'm feeling right now. I'm channeling that into belief that I will be well and I'm going to do find more to back it up by meditation. I'm going to elevate above this consciousness. I've been collecting medications, but it's time to find some news ones to inspire me, too....My original plan included cannabis oil and I just realized that I have every single ingredient together that I put on my vision board!!!! Now it's time to get to work!

Oh? That big picture? Yeah, well, I'm getting to work!!!! You want to find out what's going on in my head? Follow me on Facebook most of all, Instagram second of all and Twitter if you must! ;p

Wellness Journal | Progression Notes

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Mon, 15 Sep 2014 16:40:00 +0000

What is Canna Oil?

Pain Level:
4 out of 10. (10 being the worst). This morning when I woke my pain level was 7.5. I smoked a couple of puffs, approx. .125 g, then took a tsp of canna-coconut oil, then took my morning dose at 8 am, so OF COURSE I'm felling better!!! Yay!!!

Symptoms:
My arms hurt like a bitch. It's difficult to move them. And we had a little bit of a difficult time this morning finding a position to make love because my arms weren't comfortable.

Progression notes:

I'm starting to feel like I'm improving. My tremors have improved drastically!!!!!! My wrist is pretty straight although it still has pain. My fingers still cramp. My shoulders are stiff. I'm having a difficult time turning my neck. Holding things or doing things with my right arm is painful. My feet are still moving on their own and doing that high heel position when I walk. My cognitive dysfunction is continuing with memory problems, forgetting words, and having difficulty spitting words out. These are still better than they were last week when I went to the hospital.

Therapies:
The only therapy I'm doing right now is that canna oil and I'm disappointed in myself. But rather than beat myself up, today I am going to do one thing on my wellness plan. I'm going to sit down and create a NEW one.

Happiness Level:
2 out of 10.
(10 being the worst.)

Stress Level:
4 out of 10.
(10 being worst.)

Bedtime and Sleep issues from last night:
Got really tired after increasing my nighttime dose and went to bed at 10:30 pm.

Wellness Journal | Symptom: Stutter, Balance Problem, & Dyskinesia

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Mon, 15 Sep 2014 14:40:00 +0000

Extreme stuttering due to being stuck. Couldn't get the word out. Words ran together when spoken. Real balance problem, stumbling. Dyskinesia in my feet. Bill thought I Looked like I had a stroke.

It lasted all day.

Treatment Plan | The Secret: Belief is Half the Battle to Wellness

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Mon, 15 Sep 2014 03:03:00 +0000

I've been receiving messages from the universe telling me to get serious about my health. I haven't been keeping up with my wellness plan lately. I'm just going with the flow everyday trying to stay afloat, but that is no way to live.

I have something I need to accomplish. I need to be well, but I think there's something holding me back...I've been listening to a lot of law of attraction podcasts and one caught my attention. It said that the best way to get what you want is to make a list of cons for the thing that I want. So, here goes nothing...

List of Cons for getting well

I won't be able to write with a boring 9 to 5 job.

It's good to know there's only one thing holding me back from getting better! That's good, but this con list is not what's holding me back. I think what's holding me back is my negative self talk. I am always on the lookout for symptoms and I find that each time my symptoms are bad that my negative self talk turns up the volume. I'm sure that it's having a negative impact. The more I think negatively about it the more it promotes bad health because that's the law of attraction. The more you think about something, good or bad, the more apt that is to happen.

A good book, The Complete Self-Care Guide to Holistic Medicine, introduced me to the wellness wheel. The concept reinforces the idea that the only way to complete wellness is to make sure that all the cogs in the wheel of your life are worked on. The cogs are relationships, physical health, mental health, career, etc. To be well it is important to succeed in each of these areas. I believe that, in order to achieve that, The Secret must be learned.

So my main focus right now in my wellness plan is to have better positive self talk about all my symptoms. I may have brain fog, I may have cognitive dysfunction, but my heart is making up for it. I'm loving more and allowing more love into my life which is something I've never done before. I'm trying something new and focusing on the good of love and it's being returned. Now all I have to do is do that with my health and I will begin to feel better.

Belief is half the battle and that's where I'm getting stuck. I'm having a difficult time believing that the cannabis oil will work. Right now I'm on Day 10 of the new cannabis oil long term study. I've had to back track so that I can slowly increase my dosage so that other neurological patients can benefit from my experience and experiment. I had wonderful success with the short term study and this long term study will not be any different as long as I utilize other components of my wellness plan. The steps to wellness must begin with belief. As long as I have belief that I will get well then it will be so!

Wellness Journal | Symptom: Pins & Needles in my Hands

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Sat, 13 Sep 2014 15:27:00 +0000

Numb. Tingling left ring finger, middle, index, and thumb. Entire hand hurts. Unable to hold anything in it or lift it.

Both arms have problems, but the left hand has the worst pins and needle feelings that generally occur in the morning after waking.

Progress | Dysfunction Junction Part 4

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Fri, 12 Sep 2014 05:09:00 +0000

Continued from Dysfunction Junction Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3

Yesterday I went to the emergency room because I had horrible brain fog and a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. I did not go to the emergency room the night before when I had that terrible episode and I regretted my decision.

I spoke to my sister on the phone and I was telling her about the episode and how I was feeling and we mutually agreed that I should go to the emergency room.

I was anxious. I had been anxious all morning and I couldn't shake it. I was in tears and I didn't want to go to the emergency room when Bill came home from work to take me. I felt bad asking him to quit working, but I was so grateful that the minute I mentioned the word "hospital" he said, "Let's go." I gathered up my kindle and my purse and we headed out the door.

I was already not feeling right and all of a sudden my head started that weird tic thing that started this past Saturday. I was instantly embarrassed and it made me tear up. I started walking funny, started arching my feet while walking just like this past Saturday. When the nurse was checking me in I was having balance issues so they let me sit down. My neck was working overtime so much that it was starting to hurt from the tension.

They got me a wheelchair (I was looking pretty crazy by then) and wheeled me into the drab emergency room. The nurse asked me questions and when she left I had another episode just like the one from the night before. Bill went out to get the nurse so she could see it, but she never came into witness it. I had three more episodes while we waited.

The PA came in. I was disappointed it wasn't a doctor. He said he had ordered some tests, but didn't tell us what they were. A nurse came in and did an EKG even though there was nothing wrong with my heart.

I felt like all of this was an effort in futility. I asked the nurse if the doctor was going to come into see me because I needed an EEG. She looked at me funny before answering that they didn't have one there. My heart sank and I sighed. We left within ten minutes.

I made an appointment yesterday before going to the hospital to see my Primary Care Physician. We felt that it was important to keep the appointment because I need a referral to see Dr. Jankovic, a neurologist and movement disorder specialist in Houston, and because I wanted his advice about what to do since I'm in-between neurologists. (He thinks he's a guru, by the way.)

Dr. Killian listened to me and took his time. We discussed what had happened and he spoke about partial seizures being a possible answer as to what is happening to me, but in the same breath he cautioned me about using the word "seizures" to describe what's happening to me to doctors. He said it's best not to do that so I don't get a false diagnosis. I kinda think that's ludicrous, but am willing to operate on the side of caution. He gave me prescriptions for some blood work to test for autoimmune diseases and an EEG.

The minute I came home I crashed for a two hour nap which I desperately needed. I'm still trying to make up for that lost night of sleep I had this week. Throughout this ordeal I haven't slept much. I've been anxious. I've been a weepy mess. I've been so very negative. It's like I couldn't see the forest for the trees. I was so focused on this diagnosis or lack there of. It's so incredibly frustrating to see these doctors. I started thinking woe is me. I started thinking that this is all in my head because the doctors all say so. The only thing that's in my head is negativity. I need to replace it with vital positive thoughts. I cannot continue to go down this path because it is not the path to wellness. So, negativity and I had a chat and we broke up!

Now my train seems a little happier. Still on course. Still chugging along without my authorization, but at least the horizon ahead is looking sunny, blue and full of white fluffy clouds.

Wellness Journal | Symptom: Vertigo

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Wed, 10 Sep 2014 14:45:00 +0000

My vertigo last seconds most of the time, minutes other times (sometimes even day long on repeat), but my head pounds and my ears feel like they're filled with water. Everything loses focus and I feel like I'm going to pass out.

It feels so weird. I can't move I can't talk I can't see and all I did was lay down on my stomach on the bed or lean down to get something off of the floor or just standing up. It's not fun at all.

Progress | Dysfunction Junction Part 3

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Wed, 10 Sep 2014 05:18:00 +0000

Continued from Dysfunction Junction Part 1 and Part 2

Another scary night. Bill and I had just finished making love when I had a seizure. I think these are seizures after talking with my sister and with my nurse friend.

I arched my back, pushed my neck into the mattress and lifted my hips. I felt the tremor start at the base of my spine and travel up to my neck. I gasped from anxiety then struggled to breathe. I felt my temples swell and bright lights pulse while my eyes were closed. It was hard to hear Bill ask if I was alright. I tried to answer, but I couldn't get any words out. My body convulsed and it drew into itself in the fetal position. It was scary to say the least.

I gasped for air and started to get panicked. Something told me to calm down, so I let go of my control. I finally was able to tell him, "No," and my body relaxed.

I cried for a bit afterwards. This is so scary. I'm losing control of both my brain and my body at the same time.

Wellness Journal | Symptom: Itching

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Mon, 08 Sep 2014 14:44:00 +0000

Horrible itching going on...on my legs only. They feel like they're pulsating. It's a horrible feeling almost like I almost don't have legs. I scratch my legs so much lately that they're bloody messes.

Wellness Journal | Canna Oil Longterm Study Day 3

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Sun, 07 Sep 2014 14:33:00 +0000

What is CannaOil?

Pain Level:

7 out of 10. (10 being the worst).

Symptoms:

right shoulder pain, a big tic woke me up in my neck, some slurred speech, but not too bad.

4:00 pm:

What's going on in my life today:

Bill and I set a wedding date! Shhh!

Happiness Level:

3 out of 10. (10 being the worst.)

Stress Level:

3 out of 10. (10 being worst.)

Bedtime and Sleep issues from last night:

not tired until 1 am.

Progress | Dysfunction Junction Part 2

noreply@blogger.com (CC Castaneda, aka Cristina C. Fender) — Sun, 07 Sep 2014 05:31:00 +0000

Continued from Dysfunction Junction Part 1

The train continued its fast past by making today the very worst that I've ever had in terms of tremors. This morning I woke in terrible pain in my right shoulder and neck. I woke up, stiffly got up out of bed and stumbled into the shower. As soon as the scalding water hit my neck and shoulder I started crying. I was in serious pain.

I stood in the shower as long as I was able and then I made it back to the bed and waited for 8 am. It came slowly. Bill brought me my morning dose of Cannabis Olive Oil (my healer had authorized an increase) and I was almost in tears again when I saw it. I desperately needed relief. I waited one hour and then I gave up and smoked three bowls of marijuana.

I made love to my significant other and then got up to get dressed. My movements did not get better after smoking, but my mood did and I got ready for breakfast. During a normal Saturday morning conversation my spouse and I converse in a lively manner and today was no different. As I was trying to put on a shirt and yoga pants I began to notice pretty severe tics that I could not control. It seemed like the tics were going to happen today no matter what I had planned.

They are just as weird and odd looking as you could imagine. My neck kept jerking to the left and my speech was noticeably slurred. I could tell that Bill could tell, but he never said a word about the cognitive dysfunction. He made some half ass joke about my tics, but other than that said nothing. He held onto me and asked me constantly if I needed help. I can tell often when he's feeling overwhelmed with everything. He's such a special intuitive and empathic man. I don't often have to tell him how I'm feeling because he just knows and he sometimes knows before I do.

I found an Austin 420 magazine in the car and I began reading aloud an article that Tracy Ansley wrote about the Texas Exodus to Colorado because neurological disorder patients seeking medical marijuana are moving there. It was about this young boy who had to move to Colorado without his father and how much he misses him and wishes that marijuana were legal in Texas so he could be home again with his family. My throat caught in a sob the minute I ended the paragraph. I looked at Bill and saw tears rolling down his cheeks just like mine. We smiled at each other and then Bill helped me into the restaurant.

My legs began doing a very odd dance as we looked for a booth. Walking that short walk was interesting because I found myself stopping a lot. I also started doing this thing with my feet where I stand up on my tip toes as I walk. We ordered and talked a little. My speech was slurring and I found myself almost stopping quite a bit. Some of it was because I couldn't start a word. Either I couldn't remember it or I couldn't get it out of my mouth. There was a bunch of stuttering. Stuttering has been going on for quite a bit now, but this was new and more pronounced.

The food finally came. I was starving. I started filling my tortilla with eggs, potato and beans and found that I couldn't do it very well. I was moving so very, very slowly. My fork went toward the beans and slowly moved to scrape it into my tortilla. I tried to move faster, but I just couldn't. The eggs were a bit harder to scoop up, but I managed to get some into my taco. The slowness wasn't getting to me I kept repeating internally, but, then again, it was. Then there were three or four fried potatoes to place on top. Then there was the salsa. Then I had to stop and drink a bunch of water because I was so very thirsty. By the time I had finished loading up my first taco Bill had already eaten half his plate and I was sick of eating.

After breakfast we went and picked up my daughter for her weekend visit. Usually I try to not show my girls what I look like when I'm like this, but today I decided that I'm not going to try to hide it anymore in public. It's stupid really, because if I try to stop the movement from happening in one area then it just moves to another or the movements get out of control. I notice that if I just let them happen that I feel better. My muscles don't get quite as tense.

Today I showed my daughters my terrible movements. They were understandably not happy about the day's illness, but they were okay with it. My youngest told me that I looked funny when I did my head jerk movements which, thankfully, didn't last too long. I told her that I'm sure they looked funny, but they did not feel good and that I was embarrassed about what it looked like. My seven year old stopped and thought about it before telling me that I shouldn't be embarrassed and I was the best mommy in the whole world. That made me smile really big and it warmed my heart. She's such a wonderful, empathetic old soul!

After dinner my kid and I went to Kmart to buy her some clothes. There's only one handicapped shopping cart in the store, so M pushed the cart for me and we shopped. I was happy, but exhausted. My body had been through hell already with constant movements and it was tired, but I had a job to do for my daughter.

While trying on clothes I noticed the attendant paying attention my conversation with my daughter. I wonder if the lady thought I was drunk when I spoke to her. My words were slurred, filled with stutters, and I bumped into stuff when I walked near her.

My train is on a fast track, but right now I'm having a bit of reprieve. My body is finally slowing down and my brain is slowly lifting the brain fog alert. The aches and pains are at a higher level than normal, but it's manageable. I had someone ask me how I stay so strong which is very sweet. I thought about it before I replied, "It's not that I'm strong. I have belief that there is a reason why I'm on this blazing train. Maybe it's because this is what I'm supposed to be doing. Maybe this is my reason for living."