David Markwell

In loving memory of my dad’s little blue Volvo.1994-2011

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 21:52:00 +0000

In loving memory of my dad’s little blue Volvo.

1994-2011

Little did I know that Friday was to be your last day?
It should have been Thursday but I left your immobiliser at home.

MOT was calling you, but you didn’t want to go.
Was that because you knew what was to come? or cos your brakes were knackered and you’d never stop at the bottom of Old Mill Lane.

Yes your rear bumper was stuck on with a roll of gaffer tape, but this was only to match the wing mirror covers those little twats knocked off on Bonfire night.

Thank you for the happy times, I wish there could have been more,
To be honest I wish there could have been one!

When I got the call from Gary at the Garage my heart dropped,
Just like your suspension and sub frame.

Driving you was like going on an ocean cruise, due to all the water in the bottom of the doors.

I remember braking too fast once and the dog, who was sitting in the front, nearly drowned in the Tsunami that followed.

It broke our hearts to loose you, but it would have broke the bank to get you fixed.

Like your spare tyre my heart in now flat.

I’ll be lost without you as I was when I drove you.

So Little Blue Volvo the time has come to say goodbye.

RIP (Rest in Pieces)

David Markwell
PS110% of people who read this will not have the guts to copy and paste it to their profile and quite frankly I don't blame em. Of the other 19% who get this far do you want a car? It’s a good runner, it just doesn’t stop very well.

Poor Service. So I changed insurance. I save £174 and get what I want so it's

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Wed, 01 Dec 2010 20:13:00 +0000

Dear Swiftcover.com,

Thanks.

Even though you offered me a direct debit option on one car, I was surprise to discover the same option had not been offered for my other vehicle I insure with you.

When I rang to enquire why this was I was told that it was because of my postcode. I questioned how one car could have a DD payment but the other one could not when my postcode was the same.

I was then told that both cars could now only be paid with a one off payment, (even tho your website would allow me to renew it right now by one simple click if I wanted cos I've just had a look).

When I asked what my postcode had to do with whether I could pay or not pay monthly I was told that, "well some people in your area may not have paid on their insurance so it's an high risk postcode". I believe two things about this, 1) It's discriminatory, 2) It's a bad business plan.

So I have decided to cancel both polices with swiftcover.com, which has turn out to be a "win win" for me. I've managed to save £174.01 on your renewal quotes plus both insurance's are paid by direct debit. Which is all I wanted to start with. So thanks. Your "bonkers" way of dealing with loyal customers has made me money and lost you business. I'll never use you again.

Regards,

David Markwell

First Audio Boo For A Bit.

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sun, 30 May 2010 21:28:00 +0000

Listen!

Ban the England Flag- The truth is out there.

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Tue, 25 May 2010 22:25:00 +0000

Image: Salvatore Vuono / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I've seen and heard quite a bit across the last week about "the police" banning people wearing replica England football shirts in pubs during the World Cup.

I realized the first time I saw it, it was cobblers, but it still upset me because for some it was an opportunity to stir the cesspit of hate. So the Facebook groups have been created and statuses updated by some eager join the campaign, defy the law, attack minorities and fight PC gone mad!

I thought it might help if there was a bit of research done on the matter, not surprisingly it was easy to find the truth

England flag police crackdown rumour 'nonsense'

Police: England football shirt pub ban is a myth

So Come On England! if you wish you "can" wear your England shirt, fly your England flag, sit in your England Gazebo or push your England wheelbarrow with pride this summer and enjoy the football, but please don't use it as an excuse to attack and hate your fellow English citizens.

PS: You can get the wheelbarrows from B&Q @ £32.98, tell em Davos send you..

"Having sex while making unreliable cars"

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 00:47:00 +0000

Apologies if I've told you about this in the past but I am a huge fan of a radio programme called This American Life. It's a weekly show from Chicago Public Radio and quite frankly it has produced some of the finest radio programming I have ever heard. Earlier this week I listened to one of their shows from the 26th of March 2010, called "Nummi".

It's the story of how two major car manufacturers with very different cultures managed to run an automobile factory together. At one of the car plants workers were buying drugs, turning up drunk and having sex while they were making unreliable cars. The other carmaker needed to expand into a new market place.

Here's the radio programmes description

A car plant in Fremont California that might have saved the U.S. car industry. In 1984, General Motors and Toyota opened NUMMI as a joint venture. Toyota showed GM the secrets of its production system: how it made cars of much higher quality and much lower cost than GM achieved. Frank Langfitt explains why GM didn't learn the lessons – until it was too late.

It is wonderful radio. You can listen to the programme here: This American Life
Added extra: Recently the TAL team launched an application for iPhones that costs under 2 quid, it is the best app on my phone. If you love great story telling and you've got an iPhone you must buy this app. What do you get for your cash? well every programme the TAL team have produced for radio and TV and it's all searchable!

Lets try again shall we!

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 22:53:00 +0000

As the eagle eyed ones amongst you might be able to tell, if you've had the inclination to have a look at davidmarkwell.co.uk, a lack of blogging going off. Well without going into all the details all I'll say is that 2010 could nearly have started the way 2008 ended, but thanks to the wonderful NHS staff at Barnsley General Hospital and The Northern General in Sheffield, I'm still here, I've got a pulse, I'm 19 lbs lighter and a new outlook on life

So it gives my great pleasure to say,

I'm back blogging, audio booing, twittering and talking fluent Markwell crap. So get ready for lots of bad spelling - which comes to you thanks to a very poor teacher who would shout at me and make me look at twat in front of the whole class, when all I wanted was help with a word. Thanks Mrs O.
I hope you enjoy what I do here, but just in case you don't or you're offended with what I say or write, in the worlds of my dear old grim gram, you can go "Nallocks yor sen" (copywrite Nellie Cawthorne 1984, Balla Street, Barnsley)

(Photo our Nellie as I remember her during the power cuts of the 1970's)

Enjoying My McMuff

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Wed, 20 May 2009 16:22:00 +0000

Listen!

April Showers In May

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Wed, 20 May 2009 16:08:00 +0000

Rainbow In Dodworth

Taken with the iPhone

Barnsley Town Centre On A Saturday Afternoon In May

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sat, 09 May 2009 17:51:00 +0000

Listen!

It's Prom Night At Kingstone And What's That In The Sky?

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sat, 09 May 2009 17:42:00 +0000

Listen!

Sheffield In The Sunshine

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sat, 09 May 2009 17:34:00 +0000

Listen!

Shall We Go For Walkies?

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sat, 09 May 2009 17:28:00 +0000

Listen!

Walking From Silkstone Common

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sun, 03 May 2009 20:45:00 +0000

Sunday Afternoon at 1300.

Taken with my iPhone. Field full of Rapeseed.
Ben Bank Road, between Silkstone Common and Dodworth Barnsley

Ok Boo Boo.

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sun, 03 May 2009 19:15:00 +0000

I've downloaded a new application for my iphone, it's a mirco podcasting app called Audio Boo. Basically the software allows you to record an audio message upto 3 mins long (in broadcast quality) , add a photo, a bit of text and tag the lot.

What I really love about it is that you can subscribe via RSS to a persons AudioBoo with iTunes.

Here is one I did this morning...

Listen!

Why Radio & Music Industry Sucks Nowadays

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sun, 26 Apr 2009 07:43:00 +0000

Just seen this and thought it was very interesting. Like to know what you think?

What Makes A Great Podcast?

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 15:47:00 +0000

Just a few thoughts on what I think needs to be in place to create a great podcast.
Nothing earth shattering here but there are a couple of key points that I believe the majority of podcast producers forget.

What Makes A Great Podcast?

Content:
• Subject Clarity.
• Subject Authority.
• Subject Awareness.

Creativity:
• Ideas.
• Treatments.
• Engagement.
• Production technical standards.

Connectivity:
• Use the net and applications do the promotional work for you.
• Availability.
• SEO / Meta Data “let people find you.”

Let me know what you think.

NPR's This American Life

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 21:07:00 +0000

I’m a huge fan of “This American Life” on National Public Radio in the USA. I listen to its weekly podcast. It really is the finest radio programme I’ve every heard. It’s brilliant story telling, well produced audio that engages its audience. It must take ages to produce some of the content.

This last weekend I was spellbound listening to an episode called “My Big Break” here are the shows notes:

“Sometimes, getting your big break isn't all it's cracked up to be. A comedy duo lands the gig that can make them famous. A third-grader gets his big chance to please his mother and push his drunken father out of the picture. And other stories. “

The story that grabbed my ears was from “Act One. Take My Break, Please.”

Again here is the show notes from This American Life’s website

“Charlie Brill and Mitzi McCall were a comedy duo back in the mid-1960s, playing clubs around Los Angeles, when their agent called to tell them he'd landed them the gig of a lifetime: They were going to be on The Ed Sullivan Show. The only problem was that their performance was a total fiasco, for a bunch of reasons, including one they never saw coming. David Segal of The New York Times reports. (18 minutes)”

I’m going to repeat myself but it is just one of the best examples of story telling I’ve every heard, mixed with great archive audio and two brilliant subjects who know how to perform and deliver the show biz. Brilliant job, well done by whoever produced it.

I’d love to spend a month with the team at “This American Life” ….

Please give it a try you’ll find it at thisamericanlife.org

16 stone is enough!

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sun, 01 Feb 2009 10:17:00 +0000

I’ve been trying to loose some weight recently and after 3 weeks of much talking about it and not much action I now weigh 16 stone which is crap because when I started I was 15'10". So enough is enough and yesterday I joined a gym, I’ve got my induction at noon today.

What I like about this gym is that its not part of a big corporate organisation like JJB or Bannatynes. Its based in a local schools community centre It has all the same equipment (apart from a pool) of the bigger gyms and that’s all I want. The fees are great ……no minimum 12 month contract, where you have to give at least 30 days notice if you wanted to quit like I had to at Bannatynes. You pay £20 a month for an adult membership and that is it. None of this on / off peak cobblers, when it’s open its open and that’s it.

So this is me now….. in all my sixteen stone glory

And this is my target weight for the start of July.

Aren’t IMac’s brilliant?

Charlie and The Chillout Factory

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sun, 25 Jan 2009 21:37:00 +0000

I've been listening to a great podcast recently from a chap called Charlie North, who I've met and had a couple of business meetings with.

Charlie is a music and video producer, who is based in a village very close to where I live. If you like ambient / chillout music you'll love his work. Give him a try. You'll find him at thechilloutfactory.co.uk

You'll also find Charlie at charlienorth.com

The Shops Of Today

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Sat, 17 Jan 2009 22:30:00 +0000

"Unless you're a Youth"

I’ve seen a sign on a shop door that I’ll not be using again until it's removed. It reads “Polite Notice: No more than two youths are allowed in the shop at any one time.” In these Credit Crunchy times when a business, no matter how big or small it is, needs to do all it can to make a living it struck me that this was a great way to alienate customers and reduce income.

With 24 hour shopping in two local supermarkets I now have the choice to go somewhere else rather than a local convenience shop.

I have no knowledge of what’s happened at the shop in the past but I live in the real world and I’m aware that “some people” shoplift and that shop workers get abuse or worse are attacked which is wrong and needs to be dealt with, but to be selective just because a customer looks like a youth is not the right way. If this shop’s owners do have a problem then they need to improve their security system, employ more staff or provide better training.

I’d class my eldest son as a “youth”, he’s a great kid, he works very hard at school, he gets brilliant results, he’s not a threat to anybody and I’m very prod of him, but now if he and two mates want to go into Costcutter’s on Pogmoor Road, Barnsley they’re not welcome to spend his (my) cash.

This shop is saying we don’t trust youths being in our shop so sod off. Well fair enough, if my son and his friends are not good enough to use your shop, neither will I. Somerfield will now get an extra 40 - 60 quid a month more from me.

It’s not the youths that need to change, it’s old business practices, ideas and intolerance.

I'm starting to love Twitter!

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 21:57:00 +0000

I've started to use twitter.com a lot more recently. If you're not sure what it is, the best description I've heard for Twitter is that it's a micro blogging application.

What I love about Twitter is that you can find people that have similar interests, jobs or needs as yourself and follow what they are getting up to. Already I've discovered some wonderful stuff and contacts.

One chap that started to follow me is http://dgold.info/radio/ . I had a quick look around his website and began to listen to his podcasts where I discovered a brilliant band called Joey Farr and the Fuggins Wheat Band.

Heres a video of the kind of stuff they do..... Stay with it, it builds and builds.

Let my know what you think?

The Last Few Months.

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 22:11:00 +0000

Hello, well it's been some time since my last blog and lots of stuff has happened since then. Most of the 7 months my family has been dealing with the fact the my dad Trev "Titch" Markwell is no longer with us. He died at the end of November, 19 weeks after being diagnosed with a very rare form of stomach cancer called linitis plastica.

Surgery was not offered because there was no way of getting rid of the cancer. He'd already made his mind up early on that he didn't want chemo and after the doctors told us what he would go through he'd made totally the right choice.

I made the most of what time we had left. My brother got married two weeks after dad's diagnosis and that was a wonderful happy day for us all. Dad really gave the ball a kick at the evening reception. He could make friends with anybody and that night was no exception.

He was not in any pain when he died which we were all very happy about, I don't know how we would have coped if he had been. He passed away on Friday the 21st of November 2008 aged 72.

It's only been seven weeks since he died. It still doesn't appear to be real. I wanted to call him today to let him know that his car (that I now drive) passed it's MOT. Not bad for a 14 year old Volvo.

I miss him more and more everyday.

Hope to blog loads more in 09, regards David

Copyright laws V Common Sense

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 18:43:00 +0000

Last Sunday Asda Barnsley refused to make me a copy of an old photograph of my late grandmother, she’d be about 16 or 17 years old in the photo. Nellie Cawthorne (Nee: Padgett) died about 7 years ago, she would have been about 93 years old now.

The young man who served me, noticed the photo was on the back of a postcard and according to him, this implies that the image is protected under copyright. He said, “to make a reprint I’d need a letter from the copyright owners, that states I have their permission to make the copy”. As you’ll see from the back of the postcard, there are no clues as to who took the original picture or owned the copyright.

By my estimations the photographer would now be aged anything between 95 and 170 years old, so the chances are he’ll not remember much of the great Nellie Padgett photo shoot.

I appreciate people should be able to protect their work, but I’m not so sure why you have to pay a photographer to take the photos, only to be held to some kind of copyright blackmail no matter how many years after the work was done. It’s wrong.

If I’ve booked and paid for the photographer’s time, service and consumables, as my grandmother did, why should they then have the power over me to say how or what I do with the images.

And why haven’t Asda thought this through and come up with a way of covering themselves. If they’re unsure about any copyright issue, why not have a disclaimer form that shows they’ve asked all the questions they need about the photos. The customer then has to sign the form clearing Asda of any infringement or responsibility. If the customer refuses to sign, then Asda don’t produce the reprint.

So dear reader judge for your self (that’s if you dare look and not fear prosecution) here is my grandma Nellie in all her glory. As copied on my old scanner, that I thought was knackered, but thanks to Asda I’ve repaired it.

If only Asda had used some judgment, common sense and understanding they might still have my business. I’ve now ordered the photo online as I will with all my prints from now on.

By the way, nobody has ever made better butterfly buns. Love David

Crap Customer Service: Part 1.

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 21:57:00 +0000

A Point By Point Guide To Me Getting Crap Customer Service About Six Months Ago:

1) Visit an electronics / electrical store to buy a florescent light bulb.

2) Find what I want.

3) Go to the counter and wait to be served by any one of the two miserable young sales assistants.

4) After 60 seconds, one of them realises I’m stood two feet away.

5) They stop talking to each other and the Miss Piggy look a like holds her trotter for me to hand over the bulb. She still not looked at me.

6) “That’s £3.99”. She growls through her pork chops.

7) I wait for a “please”, “thank you” or at least “cash fat boy now!”.

8) Little Miss self confident, self important, self centred assistant, who believes all the men in the shop fancy her snorts “Enter your pin?”

9) I tap, tap, tap, tap away on the card scanner.

10) “That’s your receipt”.

11) I reach over pick up the bill and bulb and walk out of the shop promising never to buy or visit the shop again.

Coming Soon:

What happened when David forgot about what happened above and goes back to buy a £7 mic stand.

Old Barnsley Video, That's brought back some memories...

noreply@blogger.com (David Markwell) — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 21:35:00 +0000

I used to work for the old boy who is seen selling the bananas in this film. God I hated the job. I've never met or worked for a more miserable, cold man. Lucky for me I got the sack for not telling him we had a box of Spring Cabbage left at the end of a Saturday before a Bank Holiday.

Apparently I was in charge of all the stock & sales levels, as well as fetching the apples and turnips, but the pillocks never thought about telling me this.

He didn’t have the bollox to sack me himself, he got his wife to do it but she couldn’t do that right.