family, music & faith

Keep Holding On

2020-08-24T18:17:00.003-04:00

I cried today.

I'm feeling a little under the weather and I'm not exactly sure why. I have a toothache and it's messing with my ear and that side of my throat and I'm just generally tired. School work was not as energetic as it has been. It was just a hard and tiring Monday.

Today my newsfeed was filled of stories of kids being quarantined from school due to exposures, teachers expressing complete exhaustion and frustration, a friend calling me talking through how to most easily juggle the homeschool requirements and still be a working parent, my daughter sharing her own worries and anxieties...

Already not feeling great, the emotions of today just wore me down to tears. If I could say one thing to anyone out there, it would probably be this... just keep holding on. It's all so hard. There are no right answers. You're doing a good job. You're going to make it. This all WILL end eventually.

Keep holding on
'Cause you know we'll make it through
We'll make it through
Just stay strong
'Cause you know I'm here for you
I'm here for you

The Love of God

2020-08-18T13:26:00.001-04:00

Wow, this little space sure has been abandoned for some time. I tend to come here when I'm feeling sentimental and want to make sure I don't forget some of the things we are walking through. I so wish I had starting blogging back in March when quarantine started, but I don't think my heart was in a space to process what was happening.

Parenting has certainly been a rollercoaster ride that I was not quite prepared for. My desire to make the best possible decisions for our children and our family sometimes is so overwhelming in a world where there don't seem to be any "right" choices.

We are 5 days into our homeschool journey and I'm not even sure where to start with where my head is at. In some ways, it seems a lot easier than I expected. We get school done first thing in the morning and play, run errands, clean and I work the rest of the day.

I love that we get to work in our faith into our school work. Sarah's copy work this morning was writing down 1 John 4:7 - "Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God..." We have a key truth we focus on each week. This week is God is love. In a season where I feel more disconnected from my faith than ever, being reminded these simple truths and relearning the foundations of our faith has been life giving.

Now, just because it has its ups, doesn't mean that there aren't downsides as well... The kids definitely have their share of conflicts that wear on me. We have had to navigate extroverts and introverts cohabitating 24/7. We've had to mourn the loss of the abundance of friends that public school brings. We've had to adjust to running errands like masked three amigos instead of me accomplishing some of these things while they are in school. I've had to figure out how to be wife and mom and employee and teacher and so many more things. It's a balance that I'm sure will be constantly in flux.

This morning, we did a hymn study on the hymn below, The Love of God... As I reflect, I am thankful for the love and grace and mercy that we are offered. May I be able to reflect that back to my children and teach them well.

The love of God is greater far
Than tongue or pen can ever tell
It goes beyond the highest star
And reaches to the lowest hell
The guilty pair, bowed down with care
God gave His Son to win
His erring child He reconciled
And pardoned from his sin

Seven

2019-05-29T08:51:00.001-04:00

Seven years ago I was thrust into a world I didn't really know existed. The sights, the sounds, the smells that were all so foreign have become so ingrained in my being. The fear that you might miss a feeding if traffic held you up. The anxiety that another episode would further delay going home. The terror of the night that she turned blue in my arms and the nurses flew into action bringing her back to living color. The anguishing tears I cried walking the halls of the hospital after each setback. The safety of monitors and oxygen levels. The normalcy we tried to grasp by changing the baby blanket in the isolette to bring a little bit of home into this sterile place. The comfort the nurses gave; they became friends and cheerleaders along the way.

Seven years. She's healthy now. Though any medical issue causes a clench in my chest. Three ear surgeries. They've gotten easier in some ways, but having to recount her birth trauma to each doctor and nurse along the way still makes my heart beat a little faster.

I often wonder when that gut reaction will go away, but I think it may be something that I carry forever. I sit here on my couch tearing up. She sits next to me lost in a movie unaware of the deep emotions that this day holds for me. I take a deep breath and acknowledge the deep trauma that season brought us. I exhale and know that there is so much more goodness ahead, and I'm ready for whatever comes next.

I want to be here

Truly, be here

To watch the ones that I love bloom

And I want to make room

To love them through and through and through and through

The slow and barren seasons too

I feel hope

Deep in my bones

Tomorrow will be beautiful

And I'm ready, God I'm ready, oh I'm ready

Restless and hungry, I'm ready

For whatever comes next

#nallypictureaday

2017-12-24T10:46:00.002-05:00

I have been getting SO many questions about my #nallypictureaday project. I have now been at it for TWO YEARS. That's insane to me. Part of me wants to stop, but a huge part of it feels like it's become a part of our family and I loved the book we made of our 2016 year. 2017 is shaping up to be a fun book as well.

Initially for my project I wanted to document our lives. One day at a time. I wanted to be able to flip through the pages and see my kids grow up in the pages. I had two simple rules.

One picture a day
Pictures didn't need to be frame worthy or award winning - just real life images of our daily life

That's it! I posted them on my Instagram account and hashtagged them and included a date in the caption.

There were a few sub-rules that I came up with along the way...

I tried to balance pictures between the kids. I didn't count picture for picture, but you'll notice some weeks one kid is more prominent than the other and I try to balance that. That's become more difficult now that I have one in full time public school and one at home most of the time.
If I happened to miss a day, I usually filled in with two pictures from the following day. I did miss some! I tried to not make a big deal of it, but yeah... It happened. I fibbed a tiny bit. ha!

So yes - I took A LOT of photos! So now... the actual hard part -- making a book! I have been using Shutterfly for my compiled books. I chose the 8x8 hardcover photo book option. I debated bigger, but I'm cheap and the cheapest size actually works well enough. If you have a budget that allows for a bigger book - go for it! I also wait until Shutterfly has a wonderful deal or coupon. My book last year didn't get printed until March, I think.

I used one of their basic storytelling layouts for each year and started to fill. I chose a 4x4 grid layout for each page. It looks like a calendar and the squares look great with the Instagram size photos. I love that Shutterfly will connect with Instagram so I don't have to sit here and upload 365 photos! That would take forever! They connect with your account and "voila"!

January 2017 is about complete!

A few notes on this:

If you post multiple photos on Instagram in one post, Shutterfly won't pull them over. I found this out the hard way in NOVEMBER. Yikes! There are a good 5-6 days a month this year that I have to go find and fill manually. Going forward I will make sure the photo I select each day for my book is posted separately.
It helps if you have your phone open or a dual screen computer. I pull them over into Shutterfly one month at a time and then double check the dates as I fill them into my pages.
I've found that if you set up your project early and just fill in a month or two at a time it's MUCH easier to manage rather than waiting until the end of the year and doing it all at once. My 2016 book was much easier than my 2017 book is going. If I had looked at it in June I would have made some adjustments and it wouldn't be such a pain.

See all those holes? Days I posted multiple images!

The book was born out of my love of flipping through photo albums that my mom had put together when I was a kid. As my kids were aging, I realized that since technology has changed so much, I wasn't doing that. We were relying on Timehop and Facebook's "On this Day" feature to look back. I missed having printed copies that we could flip through and have my kids enjoy. With this, it's a win win!

Happy photo taking! Let me know if you take the plunge and do it in 2018! Remember that we aren't aiming for perfection -- just a simple look at every day moments. (And it's ok if you miss a day... just fill it in with a picture from that week-ish.) Let me know what you think!

Imagine

2016-11-06T09:05:00.002-05:00

Dreams are a funny thing. We have been in an in-between season for quite a while now. Ever since I became a stay at home mom in May 2015, I feel like I've been asking myself what I did or what value I had now that I wasn't contributing much financially to the family. I felt like I wasn't able to dream or plan or achieve.

Back in April 2016 I had a "what if" idea... One of those ideas that seem way too crazy to even start. I put it on the back burner. In June again it came to mind, and this time had a little further definition. But again... it felt way too big for my little self. Back on the burner it went.

Lately, we have been meeting a lot of new people and hearing a lot of stories. Getting deep and vulnerable with new friends. It's been invigorating, but I must say there was often a moment where people would ask me what my current dreams are... and I didn't have a great answer. Somehow the "pay my bills" dream doesn't really inspire.

Through these conversations, I've felt more and more comfortable sharing my "what if" idea with some folks. I don't know what I expected as a response, but the responses have been an overwhelming and resounding YES!

So, while I don't share the deepest depths of my dreams publicly on a blog, I do share to say this - if you feel a spark, an idea, a thought... share it with people. Talk it out. The more you ruminate on things outside of your own head and with people who have differing views, often it will bring clarity you never imagined.

So I'm actually starting. Putting my hand to the plow. While nothing may come of it, what if it did?

What are your dreams? Your what ifs? Your convergence of passions? Maybe it's a call to action.

You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will be as one

It's Time - Coming Home

2015-04-09T13:00:00.000-04:00

I have a confession... I'm constantly afraid. I could list all the things I'm afraid of, but it honestly wouldn't be worth your time... (and not really the point of this message)

So how do I cope with all this fear? Usually, I "turtle." I stay "safe" in my little bubble where no words or bodily harm can come to me. However, as I continue down this path of life - God is calling me out of my shell. Asking me to make some bold steps. To believe big dreams. To try something new.

Last spring we felt very strongly that it was time for another little Nally. We have been beyond blessed with the arrival of Judah and I can't say enough how my heart has grown to love not one, but two children so fully. When we felt that nudge, I was afraid. Afraid we couldn't afford it. Afraid of the dynamic it might add. Afraid of the legitimate health concerns at hand.

Instead God brought me through so many different verses and calmed my fearful heart.

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. - Deuteronomy 31:6

Over the last few months, we have been wrestling with the desire for me to be home with our kids. I have tried the working mom of two 'thing' for 5 weeks now. It isn't working. We are frazzled. We are tired. We don't have meaningful time together. Our bank account is empty due to high daycare costs. Our entire existence was simply to shuttle back and forth, eat, bathe, and sleep. If we are lucky we get some social time in at church, but even that means we don't really SEE our children, and then have a late night and an even more rough morning.

My inner most being has been screaming out - THERE MUST BE MORE THAN THIS. More than sitting in traffic 3 hours a day. More than trying to figure out what songs your child is singing, because you have no idea what songs she knows. More than driving like a mad person because your infant is starving and it's still 45 minutes to home. More than drive-thru dinners and rushed bedtime routines.

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, ""Abba," Father. - Romans 8:15

But along with my desire to be home, there was fear. Fear that we wouldn't have enough money. Fear that if what limited grocery budgets we might have, Sarah may not like her lunches. Fear that I would lose a sense of community by being home alone all day with two young kids.

But as we prayed and wrestled... and prayed some more... We came back and decided to face our fear and step out in what we knew we were being called to do. Bring me home. Raise up our children. Freelance some to bring in the needed extra income. And that trusting that God, in this step he has called us into, would provide our every NEED.

And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. -Philippians 4:19

With all that said - I have put in my two weeks notice at my current job. Overall the responses received have been positive and we are excited (though still a bit nervous!). Trusting God in this has been hard, but we know without question that we're making the right step for our family.

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27 Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life[e]?

28 “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29 Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30 If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? 31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. -Matthew 6:25-34

Nally Family - Easter 2015

Happy! Spring has Sprung!

2015-03-18T20:00:00.000-04:00

Spring is finally HERE! I am so HAPPY! Monday we reached a high of 80. That's EIGHTY degrees. I knew it was going to be a beautiful day, but boy the van was actually HOT when I got in that afternoon. Glory.

For weeks now I have been wanting to create a Spring themed wreath. I have never actually had a spring wreath, and my empty hook on the front door has been begging for something since the Christmas wreath disappeared in early January. Unfortunately when you have a tight budget, things like decor take a back seat to pesky things like bills and food.

This week, I FINALLY decided to make a wreath, and I'm super happy with out it turned out. This project took me about $10 for the materials and less than 5 minutes to assemble. How easy is that?? Here's a list of supplies and instructions if you want to make one yourself.

Supplies (all from Hobby Lobby, make sure you go when floral stems are 50% off)
1 Natural Grapevine Wreath - $2.40 (Normally $3.99 - I used my 40% off coupon)
2 sprigs of small pink flowers - one of each color - $3.99 ($1.99 each)
3 sprigs of the small white hydrangea blooms - $4.48 ($1.49 each)
Total: $10.87 pre-tax

I used wire cutters to separate each stem of the small flowers and just tucked them into the wreath. The grapevine wreath is great at holding on to floral stems. You can bend the stems a little if you need to get it to stay. The hydrangea blooms, I trimmed the stems down to about 3-4" in length and removed the leaves. I pushed the stems straight through the wreath form and then bent the ends back around into the wreath form to secure.

That's it! No glue, no wire, no nothin'! Just some flowers and a wreath form. (And something to trim the wire stems. I use a command hook for hanging for a cleaner look.

Happy crafting! Hope you have a warm, bloom filled spring!

Welcome Home, Son

2015-03-08T13:45:00.003-04:00

Putting together Judah and Sarah's room has been such a fun project since we moved in August. We knew that having a boy and girl sharing the same room, we couldn't rely on the overly pink and flowery motif of Sarah's old space.

My very talented mother-in-law helped us create the quilts, pennants and curtains for their room. I LOVE how it turned out. I had fun figuring out how to recover a lamp shade and making the "canvas" art over their beds. I hope you enjoy it as much as we do!

Still can't believe we have a little brother in the house!

Sarah wanted to say "CHEESE" for the camera!

Judah's half of the room.

So much fun taking pictures!

Sarah's my little monkey.

Sarah's half of the room.

Judah's my little lion man.

She even made matching bedding for the baby bed!

Our first picture with Sarah (top) and our first picture with Judah (bottom).

Such a beautiful quilt!

Hope you enjoyed the tour! Welcome home, son. We are so glad you're here.

Counting Stars

2014-12-12T15:57:00.000-05:00

I have been hard on myself recently thinking that I should have written this update sooner, but then I take a breath and remember all the good moments of the last few weeks and am glad that I took time to REST.

The last, well, month and a half has been a whirlwind of celebrating Judah's arrival with family and friends. We have had sickness and trials, but through it all, life has been FULL. Full of joy, full of moments to be thankful. Too many to really name.

We have made it to the 36 week mark. This was not a date I ever dreamed of making it to when I first found out I was pregnant. I had this internal finish line of "if I make it to Thanksgiving, I'll be happy." Well we have made it to that point and don't have any signs of slowing down. We have scheduled our 'finish line' date of December 30th. If Judah doesn't make his arrival naturally by that date, we will do a C-section then. My name is on the OR schedule. That date is scheduled at 39 weeks. Ready or not, here we come!

Judah Isaac: 35.5 weeks - estimated around 6lbs.

Lately I been, I been losing sleep

Dreaming about the things that we could be

But baby, I been, I been prayin' hard

Said no more counting dollars

We'll be counting stars

Yeah, we'll be counting stars

In My Arms

2014-11-06T11:06:00.004-05:00

Since the day we found out our official due date, I've had an invisible red circle around October 29 - the 30 week mark - in my planner. While I've been determined to have a healthy pregnancy this time around, there was always a little part of me wondering if we'd make it this far.

We have entered uncharted waters. With Sarah I didn't really get to have a third trimester.

When we first found out I told my dear friend, Kelsey Harrison (Owner/Photographer at Kelsey Harrison Photography: http://kelseyharrisonphotography.com), and told her one major thing I wanted this pregnancy that I never got with Sarah was maternity pictures. October 26th, we went out and did just that! I am so beyond thrilled with how they turned out. If you need photos of your family, she is truly the best to work with. She not only captured our entire family, but also some of the little details of our life... One of my favorite pictures is a simple picture of Sarah's sweet curls. I always try to catch them, but never am successful.

We are beyond excited to meet sweet Judah, but I am so grateful that my health is remaining in check and he's staying put for right now. Here are some of my favorites from the session.

Your baby blues, so full of wonder

Your curly cues, your contagious smile

And as I watch, you start to grow up

All I can do, is hold you tight

In my arms

When I'm With You

2014-10-20T12:06:00.000-04:00

Well, folks. We've reached the third trimester. I am, admittedly, pretty on edge and constantly questioning every slight sensation, feeling, and pain. My doctor has been very encouraging of me to be hyper-sensitive to each symptom and discomfort. We have gone in for a couple unplanned check ups, one was after hours so it took place in the ER, which sounds way more scary than it really was. So far all the tests and labs are coming in clean and with excellent results. My doctor is very happy with where I am.

We have started the two week check ups already! AND, we have scheduled the rest of my appointments, all the way past my due date. Hard to believe that we're already to this point. As Sarah would say, "I can't believe it!" (one of her new phrases!) This excites me, since I adore my doctor and love seeing her.

My nesting instincts are kicking in pretty hard and I'm trying to get the kid's room ready get some color on the walls. I have a fun project that I'm working on and I can't wait to share pictures of how it all comes together!

Speaking of kicking, Judah is seriously one active and STRONG little boy. It makes it difficult to focus on things most days! He is much stronger than his sister was and is growing big and stronger every day. When he starts wiggling, I wonder what he's going to be like. I can't wait to meet him and hold him.

As for other updates - Sarah has spent a week now with both sets of Grandparents over the last month or two. She did great at both places for the week. She's such a big and independent little girl. It was amazing to see the new things she came home saying and doing after being gone for a week. My new favorite this past week is how she was SO excited to see our cat, Abby. She kept chasing her saying "So cute!". They really love each other. Warms my heart.

Sarah also had an eye doctor appointment this past week. I am fairly sensitive to her vision, and have notice that she appears cross-eyed in pictures and has now for over a year. I'm not the only one to notice it, so I know I'm not totally crazy! I insisted she receive another exam to make sure she didn't need corrective help. The eye doctor said that, as last time, he believes that the bridge of her nose is just very wide which causes the illusion of being cross-eyed.

October 2014

Trust and Obey

2014-09-19T12:45:00.000-04:00

I've always wanted to keep this blog a place of honesty and transparency... So I'm going to be honest - this past week has be rough. Jim was out of town for most of it, which left me on "full time mom, full time employee and full time baby incubator" mode which left little room for any time to really REST.

This week we have also discovered the true meaning of what I'm sure people are trying to describe with the 'terrible twos'. Most evenings have ended up in uncontrollable meltdowns. We are at a loss. It's like a mean game of 'figure out the puzzle', but if you don't figure out the puzzle quick enough then the tear factory will explode.

In spite of this frustrating puzzle, God has been whispering lessons in my ear through all of it... "Trust and obey." Sounds pretty simple, right?

Most of Sarah's meltdowns typically start because of one of two reasons.

She is directly disobeying a command/directive.
She wants to do something by herself and will NOT accept help.

I often found myself saying things like: "You aren't quite big enough for that yet, but you will learn. Right now, mommy needs to help." "Trust me, I know how to do it." "It's bedtime, we can't watch anymore TV."

It makes me question moments in my life that I feel like I'm struggling against something... How often is God whispering, "You're not quite ready for that yet, but give it some time. Until then, let me help." Or even, "It's time to move on, you can't do it that way anymore."

If something feels like a struggle and you're straining against the world - take a moment to stop and ask God, "is this really how I'm supposed to do it? Is this really what you want for me?" And then just listen. Read the Word. He might just be trying to tell you something.

It's a BOY

2014-08-14T16:23:00.000-04:00

We definitely have had an exciting day today! We found out that we are expecting a BOY in January. I am just completely overwhelmed and still coming to understand what that means for our little growing family.

We knew today was the "big" day, so we definitely woke up excited! We opted not to take Sarah to this one since the ultrasound usually takes a good 30 minutes or more. I didn't want to have to try and worry about her getting antsy while we were taking a peek.

He was not cooperating very well and was incredibly active. She was having trouble getting all the views of the heart she needed, but finally was able to manage despite his best attempts to thwart her plans. She finally got down to the tell tale area, and exclaimed... "Well that's your problem right there! It's a BOY!" And there was no mistaking that he was, indeed, a boy.

Jim was completely beaming from ear to ear and I was a little in shock! Not that I didn't want a boy - I have just not been around many boys... Their energy overwhelms me a little! However, Jim reminded me that Sarah was a little spitfire, too... and that if I can handle her... Then I can handle a boy. So true.

We have decided to name him Judah Isaac. Judah was a name that I kept coming back to and fell in love with the meaning. Judah means "praise or thanksgiving" in Hebrew. Isaac means "laughter". It is our prayer that our son will be filled with laughter and praise all the days of his life.

8/14/14 - Meet Judah (he's a wiggly one!)

Say Goodbye

2014-07-25T12:00:00.000-04:00

It's been about a week since we said goodbye to my final surviving Great Grandmother. It was a bittersweet weekend at home with the entire family gathered. I don't remember the last time we were able to have virtually everyone there. Unfortunately there were a few spouses and kids unable to make the trip, but everyone we grew up with around the Christmas tree was there. It was good.

We spent 5-6 hours on Friday in the funeral home reminiscing, looking at pictures, laughing, sharing stories... Sarah (who unfortunately missed a nap that day) decided to run up and down the hall of the funeral home singing "Let it Go!" at the top of her lungs... I, as her mother, cringed a little at the boisterousness and irony. However, it did bring many smiles and laughter.

I am so overwhelmed by how blessed and how truly special it is that I have spent 28 years of my life having Great Grandparents around. I have fond memories of 4 of them, and was especially close with the last two who passed. It's part of our decision to want children at a young age. I hope and pray every day that my grandparents will stay healthy and around for at least another 20 years so that Sarah and any future children can learn their stories and have fond memories as I have. (If you're one of my grandparents reading this - take care of yourselves! We want you around for a long, long time!)

As for Great Grandma Becht, my biggest regret is that I hadn't seen her since Christmas. In some ways, I am sure it was a blessing. She was still mostly herself, albeit very quiet. When we left there I had a deep sense in my soul that it might be the last time I saw her. My intuition turned out to be right. The thing that broke my heart the most that night was seeing the tears fill her eyes as we said goodbye. I honestly think she had the same feeling I did. She missed the family. She missed being home. She missed the holidays with a room full of family.

While I tear up every time I think back to the last time I saw her tear filled eyes, I have to smile a little knowing that she is truly at home now. She's been reunited with the love of her life that she spent 70 years with. I know that she's reunited with friends and other family members that had long since passed. She's watching over my angel baby, Isaiah, and telling him stories about me as a child. Most importantly she's with Jesus and has a new body with no more pain.

We love you, Grandma.

December 20, 2013 - our last visit with Great Grandma Becht

So say goodbye 'cause you'll be leaving soon

I know it's hard and I'll be missing you

I know it's time to say goodbye

Baby Mine

2014-07-11T17:30:00.000-04:00

Well, we've made it safely into the 2nd trimester! Praise God! My office lighting and computer screen were causing a lot of nausea in that 1st trimester. After about a week and a half, I think I can safely say that it's all gone! Wahoo!! That doesn't mean foods sometimes won't make me a little unsettled, but it's not the unending waves of nausea that I had.

I'm barely starting to pop out a little bit. I've been in maternity pants for a while now, though due to bloating and just not being very comfortable in my regular pants. Now I'm slowly incorporating some of the maternity tops as well as my belly slowly shows itself.

Next week I go to the doctor for my monthly check up. I am planning on taking Sarah with me to try and introduce her further to the idea of a sibling. I try to talk about momma having a baby. She LOVES looking at the babies in the nursery room at school. I asked her yesterday if she wanted a baby at home, and she said yes! I asked if she wanted a baby brother or sister and she said no to both. HA! Not sure how that's going to work out for her.

We started potty training a couple weeks ago, and I use the term lightly because we've had little to no success... Guess we're just going to have to wait a bit. She has all the signs of being ready, but gets stage fright I think. She's been very insistent about needing to go to the potty, especially for #2, but when she gets there she starts crying for her diaper. :( Poor baby... Really just hoping to have her out of diapers by the time the new little one gets here - really don't want to be buying two sizes! Yikes!

This morning some of our good friends had their second precious baby and it's just making me dream about what our little guy/gal is going to look like! Will we have a duplicate of Sarah? Or a completely different mixture of her daddy and I? Only time will tell.

Right now, I am heavily wading through names trying to pick out a boy and a girl name before our big gender appointment in August. I know there's a very, very slim chance that we might find out next week at our appointment depending on if we get an ultrasound or not. Our doctor loves ultrasounds, which I'm not upset by! I love seeing the baby grow!! I have a favorite girl name, but dad isn't 100% on it yet - and neither of us are happy with any of the boy options. We even polled Facebook, which was hilarious. Thanks, guys, for your suggestions! If it's a boy, I guess we'll be forced to pick something out!!

Until next time... Dreaming of my sweet little one. Yearning to cuddle and breathe in that baby smell.

Ultrasound picture from 6/16/14 - 11 weeks

A Life That's Good

2014-06-08T20:21:00.001-04:00

It's with trembling excitement that I write these words... We are expecting our next child, due to join the world around January 6, 2015.

I know after our first experiences - with losing our first and then having a 7 week NICU journey with our second... Many people may think we're crazy. But this is something that we are so incredibly thrilled to be welcoming another child into our family. This has been on my heart for so long, and am so excited that God is leading us down this path again.

I am going to be much more mindful of diet and exercise this pregnancy, and definitely under the watchful care of the most wonderful doctor. Nutrition really is the biggest key for me to have a healthy pregnancy. Unfortunately in this first trimester, it's just a matter of what my stomach will handle and what will calm it down. Plain pasta, mashed potatoes and 7up are the things that are most helpful. As I start to feel better, I will definitely be more mindful over what is going into my body.

We went to the doctor in mid-May and saw our little "gummy bear" as he/she has been nicknamed so far. Everything was healthy and looked great! The doctor's first exclamation was "there's only one!!" Despite not having twins run in our family, I have had an irrational fear of twins lately, so that was wonderful news! (Not that twins aren't great - I just don't know if I could do it emotionally or carry them physically...) I hadn't even mentioned the thought to her either. :) And almost within the same breath, she says, "and it's in the right place!" What a relief. I'm so blessed to have a doctor who anticipates exactly what I'm worried about and helps calm those fears immediately. We were measuring about a week behind where we thought we were, but as the doctor explained, with how my body has been working - it's completely normal. We got to see the tiny heart pulsing, but sadly was too tiny for us to hear this past visit. We'll get to hear it hopefully in mid-June if baby cooperates!

After having one child, we know that it really does take a village to raise a child. So how can you help, you may ask?

Right now the biggest piece of the puzzle is prayer. Pray for a healthy, full-term delivery. If I make it to Christmas I will be a happy camper! But how even more wonderful it would be to make it all the way to my due date. I'm longing to have a normal, non-C-section delivery as well, so please be praying that my body will cooperate when the time comes.
Hold me accountable. If you're out eating with me, help me to make good meal choices - skip the Sprite and get water. If I'm leaning towards pasta and fried foods, direct me to the grilled meat and healthy veggies. Nutrition is a big key in all of this for me, and definitely one of my weaker points. I won't be mad at you, I promise. I just need help some days.
Help us talk with Sarah about being a BIG SISTER! She's very jealous of other babies with Momma right now and we could use all the good PR we can get about being a big sister!

We value your love and support with us as we begin this exciting journey into parenthood - again!

Our first glimpse of the new peanut back in May.

I Get To Be The One

2014-05-29T14:14:00.003-04:00

My sweet Sarah,

Today, you turn 2. I regularly think back to the day you were born. It was the day a dark cloud rolled in over our home and stayed for the next 7 weeks, as we both fought for our lives. As much as I wanted that beautiful, full term, glowing, all smiles delivery you see on TV, God gave me something so much more special. He gave me you, and your amazing testimony that day. You and I both walked through those dark valleys together with your daddy. We found God in those moments and continue to see Him every day as we remember back to that valley we came through.

From the start you were a fighter. You had your own schedule. You were your own person. You were determined. You were aware. These same qualities still hold true today. It's amazing to watch you grow and, even more fascinating to see the ways you stay the same. Through every season of life your tenacity, confidence and courage shine through.

Right now in life, you are learning how to speak in sentences and let us know what you want. Branching out from the "more" and "peeese" (please). You love to grab my car keys, jump on your toy car and tell me that you're going shopping. You adore "Stuffins" and "Fia" (Doc McStuffins and Sofia the First for the non-toddler crowd!) You love playing tea party and serve the best cups of tea. You also love carrying around dolls and animals with a blanket and pillow and make them go "night night" all over the house. Your favorite place is on the kitchen floor as we're trying to cook or clean. :)

My love, you are such a joy and a blessing. I wouldn't trade any moment that I have been able to spend with you. You are unique, beautiful and so very smart. You are so very special to your daddy and me. Hope you have a fabulous birthday.

Love,

Momma (& Daddy!)

Through birthdays and broken bones

I'll be there to watch you grow

I get to be the one...

Beautiful Day

2014-04-02T12:38:00.001-04:00

I must say.... I LOVE Spring. I always have. It, more than any other season, shows me God's love. This year it has been even more so evident. If you have never slowed down and enjoyed Spring through the eyes of a two year old- I really encourage you to do so. It's full of discovery and wonder.

Sarah has become so aware of the world around her. She chases the birds because she wants to converse with them. She loves pointing out trees and leaves. There is no urgency or rush - no anxiety or care. Only the innocent admiration of these "new" things.

May we look at the world with fresh eyes, looking for the wonder and awe in our every day moments. What is a busy, stressful day worth if you can't take a moment to stop - stand in the sunshine - feel the warmth on your skin and soak in the glory of God. Try it. Let me know how it feels.

Spring is Coming

2014-03-07T12:34:00.002-05:00

Early March has a way of rattling my soul. This month always seems so unimportant - no major birthdays, no anniversaries - just the slow thaw that moves us closer to spring.

However, I always stop and reflect and listen this time of year...

Three years ago we lost our first child on the 2nd of March. What a traumatic day that was. We spent the first week or two recovering from surgery, mourning our loss, and celebrating his brief, but oh so special life. It was in this valley that a little voice began whispering in our ear... This is not your home.

Later that year, we uprooted and moved to Franklin, TN. This is still one of the best decisions we ever made. Despite the hardships we have faced and the difficulties that come with being separated from your loved ones, it has truly shaped our direction and vision as a family. I truly believe that we wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for our little Isaiah Matthew.

Two years ago we celebrated our soon-coming little girl. This was the exact same weekend that a year prior we were mourning. A true testament to seeing beauty come from ashes and the redemption that comes. What a joy it was to find out we were expecting our beautiful Sarah Katherine.

Last year didn't hold much pomp and circumstance, however that little voice started whispering again... Time for another change. Prepare yourself. This past year has brought job changes, lay offs, joy, laughter and tears

This weekend we will spend our early March in a class we would have never dreamed of a year ago. This year we are again seeking and discerning the call God has put on our lives. And yet again, early March has brought that still small voice whispering of further direction, vision, and passion.

I wonder where we will be next year at this time. It seems like God has continually brought me back to this time of year and I'm so grateful to have this time of year together with Him.

Spring is coming... New things are on the horizon... Are you listening? What is He whispering to you?

Nally Advent 2013 - Week 2 - Hopeful Abiding

2013-12-09T22:38:00.002-05:00

Scriptures: Isaiah 11:1-10, Psalm 72:1-7, Romans 15:4-13, Matthew 3:1-12

All throughout the scriptures, there is a constant rhythm of Christ calling us unto Himself. This call is a personal invitation for us to abide in Him and with Him. It can no longer be the faith of our fathers and our grandfathers. We must choose to abide in the hope and love that He offers for ourselves. We choose to accept His sacrifice and His saving grace extended to the Gentiles and to all the nations of the world. Christ came as a babe to raise us as spiritual sons of Abraham. The root of Jesse was birthed from the defeated stump to bring life and stand as a beacon to the nations. Let us come once more in to awe and reverence of the Lord Christ's entry in to this world.

With this second candle, we light it in honor of the hope that burns bright in our hearts. It is filled with visions of peace on earth and the lion and the bear living in harmony with the ox and lamb. All is brought to complete justice and proper order. This hope not only burns on this candle, but also in our hearts as we yearn to share this gift and salvation with others.

Let us be bold in sharing the gift of hope and salvation to all those whom He loves.

Nally Advent 2013 - Week 1 - Expectant Augmentation

2013-12-01T21:55:00.000-05:00

Last year we started the tradition of celebrating the advent season in our home with the lighting of an advent wreath. This year, we desire to grow that tradition and share it with you as we journey through this season of advent. Each Sunday evening we will post our family's interpretations of our own advent liturgy based upon the Revised Common Lectionary readings for this year. (A note from Jim: We're choosing to read the RCL in the spirit of dwelling in the same Word as millions of believers all over the world who follow this tradition. We'll all be sharing the same Word and awaiting the same King.)

We read these words aloud as a family and sang the song below. Please feel free to join us and share any thoughts you may have as we journey towards the manger together.

**************

Scriptures: Isaiah 2:1-5, Psalm 122, Romans 13:11-14, Matthew 24:36-44

The season of Advent is a time of preparation and remembrance. We come together to remember the birth and incarnation of our Lord Jesus Christ, who was with God and was God at Creation, His Birth, and His coming again. By remembering His birth and preparing for our celebration of it, we remember more than an event 2000 some years ago. We remember Christ’s coming return as King of a New Creation. The promise was foretold through the prophets before Him and in the songs of praise. We celebrate that the promises have been fulfilled in part through the birth, life, death, and resurrection of Christ, but also that even greater promises are still coming.

After Christ’s resurrection, He left with us His Spirit to light and guide our paths in and beyond our sacred times together. We remember and acknowledge His Spirit’s presence here by the lighting of the first candle. It is the candle of expectation, both of the expectation the ancient Israelites had for their coming messiah and the same expectation we have for His return. The flame reminds us that His Spirit assures us now, as it has through all history in all times and in all places, that we expect the fulfillment of God’s work in our lives and in this world. We eagerly anticipate and prepare for the coming King in our daily lives and the lives of our families. Our faith is not built on a far off dream or idyllic desire, but the expectation that, as God has moved, God is moving, and He will move again.

Let have the faith to expect God to heal, redeem, and restore our broken lives that we may serve and glorify Him forevermore. We know not the day nor the hour, but Christ is coming again!

Every Season

2013-11-21T21:39:00.002-05:00

I have often said that I find God in the changing of the seasons. I see the correlations between the seasons of our lives and the earthly seasons. For this reason I am so glad to live in a place that has such beautiful season changes.

Today as I looked out on the final beautiful leaves that are lingering, I recognize that again with the seasons, the Nally family again is entering a new season. We have lots going on that we haven’t shared with many just yet (And, no, I'm not pregnant :P) . I will begin to share more in the coming days. Today I will share the first bit of news with you...

I have accepted a new position and begin in two weeks on December 5th. I am joining the team at the Tennessee Initiative for Perinatal Quality Care (TIPQC.org). Their main purpose is to improve health outcomes for mothers and infants in Tennessee. They do this through bringing together Obstetricians, Neonatologists, Nurse Practitioners, Nurses, Pediatricians, Hospital Administration, and Parents all together to work towards this goal of improving health outcomes.

Over the last 5 years, they have made great strides in lowering the infant mortality rate, decreasing infections in the NICU, instituting scans for congenital heart defects and so much more.

If you know anything about me at all, or have been reading the blog for any amount of time, you will know that this is SO in tune with where my heart is. I CANNOT wait to start and be used in this field.

Final Fall Colors

She is Love

2013-11-17T14:33:00.000-05:00

Well hello! It's almost been 6 months since I posted! That is truly crazy. Our life has been one adventure after the next lately. Sarah really came into her toddler self after her birthday and we haven't stopped moving since.

She is now walking/running, talking (only a handful of words still), fascinated by all things, shows strong preferences and opinions and is so incredibly smart. She follows commands, knows what "Let's go change your diaper" means and "Are you hungry for breakfast?" She LOVES brushing her teeth and is getting more teeth every day! She's doing very well in school and is just a general joy to be around.

Sarah is around 20 lbs currently and has moved into the 18 month clothing sizes with just a couple 12 month items lingering in the wardrobe. I'm constantly amazed at how "normal" she seems, and no one asks why she's so tiny anymore. I don't have to explain that she was a preemie, because when I tell them she's 18 months old, it's believable. AHHH... I always HATED to answer the "how old?" question, because it always led to a much longer conversation than the asker was prepared for. Now we are thankfully past that. We definitely tell our story often and when appropriate, but not to every adoring grannie at Target. :)

Today is World Prematurity Day and we are wearing Purple today to show support for this great moment of awareness. (Daddy would have worn purple, too, but he doesn't own any.) Just yesterday, I was standing in line at a children's clothing store and there were three of us in a row who all had preemies. We all said the same thing.. before we had one, we had never heard of it happening - and now that we have preemies it seems like EVERYONE has one. I hope to bring awareness to those who have never had to sit and listen to the agonizing beeps and hums of the NICU while waiting for your 2lb baby to grow an ounce or two each day. I also hope to bring hope to those who are currently in the NICU and feeling like there is no end in sight. The NICU journey is a deeply personal and emotional time in a family's life and I hope that we can be a light for someone that has a similar story. So today, for these reasons our family wears purple in solidarity with those who are walking this battle for the first time, those who live it every day, those whose little miracles are in Heaven waiting for them, and for the medical professionals who are working to lengthen pregnancies and shorten NICU stays and help families have healthier and happier outcomes.

11/17/13 - World Prematurity Day 2013

One Year

2013-05-30T19:00:00.000-04:00

My dear sweet, inquisitive Sarah,

A year ago, I was very sick and I didn't even know it. When the doctor told me that I was going to have you that night I was very scared. I was terrified that I would lose you. I didn't get to meet you on your birthday, or even the day after. Everything happened so very quickly and yet time stood still. I thank God every day for the medical team that rallied around you and me to make sure we both were healthy and strong. I often wish I could go and show you off to the nurses in the NICU and to the doctors who helped you. You truly are a miracle baby.

We have had quite a year together as a family of three. You are incredibly intelligent and inquisitive. Nothing gets by your watchful eye. You must explore everything and are always happier when you are outside and on the move. I must say, I think your daddy may have found a little camping and hiking buddy.

People tease me for taking so many photos of you - but I just can't help it. You are really the most beautiful child I have ever known (even though I'm a little biased). I pray that as you grow, I am wise in helping you balance your confidence in your inner and outer beauty that is evident, and not being hung up on what you may perceive to be flaws.

As we continue to grow together, I also ask that you forgive me in my moments of failure and insufficency. I pray that you forgive me when I lose my temper and get angry. I pray that you learn forgiveness and grace.

You are my sweet little miracle and I thank God for your life. Your daddy and I love you so very much and cannot wait to watch the wonderful, beautiful, intelligent young woman you develop into.

-Momma

Landslide

2013-02-03T21:51:00.002-05:00

Sickness has hit the Nally home. Thursday I left work early to get a check up. I was hoping it was just a sinus infection, and the doctor gave me a prescription of Tamiflu and told me to stay away from work until Monday. Friday I stayed home and sent Sarah on to daycare. She had a cold for almost two weeks, but it had been clearing up. Friday night we were up all night with Sarah. She was up about every hour or two. She went almost 15 hours before she ate or drank anything had had a fever over 101. The fever has since come down and subsided. But she's still not eating regularly, still not accepting a paci, or really putting much of anything in her mouth.

She's taken quite a bit of pedialyte and kept it down, but anything to do with formula, she really doesn't want it. I'm not sure if she's nauseous and the milk is upsetting it further or what..... We are going to go to the doctor as soon as they can get her in tomorrow. I am quite worried over her lack of nutrition this weekend and she's still oddly fussy and happy - she'll go from laughing to crying in an instant.

I am feeling much better, but the stress of an unhappy child is really driving me crazy. I feel so helpless and uncertain of what to do.

In other news, we have decided to join the March of Dimes walk on April 20 at Centennial Park here in Nashville. If you are interested in supporting us, you can either donate to our cause, or choose to walk with us. I believe it will be a great celebration of everything we've been through over the last 8 months. Click here to either join our team or make a donation in our name: http://www.marchforbabies.org//team/t1992256.