Bull City in Wonderland

CHAPTER NINETEEN: FORMER DA GOES TO HAITI WITH JOHNNY EDWARDS

2010-03-05T07:26:00.000-08:00

Jailed Durham District Attorney Michelle Gnofin-Ekud was released from Guantanamo Bay this morning. The U.S. Justice Department declined to prosecute her as an "Enemy of Justice" combatant. She was...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: DA’S SCRIBBLES LAWSUIT FROM THE DURHAM COUNTY JAIL – THE PUBLIC SUED FOR “ACTIONABLE STUPIDITY”

2008-01-17T07:59:00.000-08:00

Durham Nocturnal Herald - Breaking News! Jailed Durham District Attorney Michelle Gnofin-Ekud penned a lawsuit on a long piece of toilet paper that was smuggled out of the Durham County Detention...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: FEDS OCCUPY DURHAM. DA SEIZED

2007-12-27T09:09:00.000-08:00

Michelle Gnofin-Ekud, the elected District Attorney of Durham County, stepped out of her front door to get the newspaper on the lawn, and saw them: Federal troops dressed in desert camouflage and...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

BCIW BREAKING NEWS: DURHAM CITY MANAGER DEMOTED

2007-12-12T08:38:00.000-08:00

Durham City Manager Baker Hattrick was demoted yesterday and placed in the ceremonial position as Most High Legal Chieftain of Durham overseeing the Office of the Legal Lemming Leapers. The LLL,...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN: "MIND IF I EAT MY DONUT WHILE YOU DO THAT?"

2007-12-10T12:21:00.000-08:00

FROM: LUCIUS GLENN FORD, III, ESQ TO: PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR LYNN SNAPWOOD Would you check with the local call-girls and ex-police officers to find out if: A. Stripper #1, Candy Mint, was known to...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN: PONY DNA TRACED TO DURHAM CITY HALL, DUKE ANTHROPOLOGY OF GUILT DEPARTMENT AND TO DPD BASEMENT RESTROOM

2007-11-29T07:27:00.000-08:00

PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL INVESTIGATOR’S REPORT TO LUCIUS GLENN FORD, III, ESQ. Our investigators found trace DNA evidence (99.99999999999 % identical to that taken from the nether regions) of the...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

BCIW BREAKING NEWS: JOE CHESHIRE AND DAVID EVANS FOR DURHAM CITY COUNCIL

2007-11-26T12:57:00.001-08:00

We demand a recount! According to the Board of Elections, in the recent municipal elections, BCIW received one vote for mayor of Durham. Joe Cheshire, Esq. and David Evans each received one vote for...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER FOURTEEN: Press Release from the Right Reverend Jesse Al Jacksharpton Supporting the Duke Three

2007-11-15T06:49:00.000-08:00

“We condemn the racist prosecution of these three fine young, black Duke students for a crime that they did not commit, could not commit and wouldn’t be tempted to commit. Yet, as preachers of the...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

BREAKING NEWS FROM CRUST MAGAZINE: MURDERED WRITER SET TO REVEAL STRIPPERS WERE DURHAM VICE COPS ON A STING OPERATION AGAINST REPUBLICANS

2007-11-09T07:10:00.000-08:00

Crust: The Magazine of Civilized Living reveals for the first time that our esteemed colleague, Duffy Welpingson, was set to reveal the Duke Polo Pony bestiality case bombshell before he was...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN: Durham City Council Declares “War on Duke Student Terror” in order to “Stop Duke-on-Durham Crime”

2007-11-08T12:39:00.000-08:00

The Durham Nocturnal Herald By Lee O. Henry Last night, at a triumphant election night victory party, the Durham City Council (with one lone dissenter), voted to “Declare War on Duke Student...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER TWELVE: STRIPPER-MOM #1 IDENTIFIES PONY MOLESTING MISCREANTS

2007-11-05T07:01:00.000-08:00

The New York Temerities STRIPPER MOM #1 FINGERS PONY MOLESTING MISCREANTS By Duff Beer Beck Durham – The Duke Polo team suffered another setback yesterday, when Candelabra Mint, better known as...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER ELEVEN: Herald supports Councilwoman Diane Catoadti's plan for Anticipatory Arrest Warrants for Duke Students

2007-11-01T07:38:00.001-07:00

The Durham Nocturnal Herald Endorses Diane Catoadti for city council We at The Herald say vote Diane Catoadti for Durham City Council. Her crusade against the presumption of innocence for those...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

THE BULL CITY-IN-WONDERLAND AWARD

2007-11-01T06:00:00.000-07:00

Nominations are now open (until we decide they are closed) for the first Bull City-In-Wonderland Award. We would like to honor a real person who lives or works in Durham, North Carolina, who in the...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER TEN: LAPSED MORMON GRADUATE STUDENT STRIPPER MOM TELLS ALL TO HERALD

2007-10-26T08:04:00.000-07:00

“Do they have no shame?” I screamed at my junior associate when he showed me the front page of The Durham Nocturnal Herald. He handed me a "Special Non-Nocturnal, Afternoon Exclusive Edition" of...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER NINE: The Durham Nocturnal Herald editorializes: Presumption of Innocence is the Cloak of Cowards

2007-10-23T08:19:00.000-07:00

In my decades of law practice I had seen many tragic and disturbing things, but the editorial page of the Herald topped them all that day: PRESUMPTION OF INNOCENCE IS THE CLOAK OF COWARDS We second...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER EIGHT: Celebrated Former NYTs Writer/Blogger Found Dead in Durham

2007-10-22T12:08:00.000-07:00

It didn’t take long for the DA’s X-rated press conference to take a back seat to even bigger news. There it was on the front page of The Durham Nocturnal-Herald: Celebrated former NYTs...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER SEVEN: DA's X-Rated Press Conference

2007-10-19T08:42:00.000-07:00

The chief prosecutor of Durham County was dressed in an attractive black pantsuit and flats. Her hair was cut surprisingly like former Senator Johnny Edwards', but she had a three o'clock shadow on...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER SIX: Confessions of a Potbanger*

2007-10-17T10:39:00.000-07:00

*[Help write this chapter contest. No prizes will be awarded. The lack of a prize still might be taxable by the IRS. Check with your accountant before submitting. The best ideas from the comments...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER FIVE: Heads Up!

2007-10-15T08:51:00.001-07:00

Even before the DNA test results came back, I attempted to speak with the prosecutor. Surely, she wouldn’t charge my clients when I had proof-positive they were innocent. Durham County District...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER FOUR: Duke Group of 69 say no apologies needed

2007-10-11T11:42:00.000-07:00

I fired off a nasty e-mail to Professor Nancy D.S. Grace, chair of the Histrionic Studies Department at Duke about her grotesquery masquerading as support for my clients. _________________ Prof....

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER THREE: The Infamous Duke Chronicle Ad

2007-10-10T07:59:00.000-07:00

_____________________________________ We are listening: first and foremost to ourselves, but also to our students, and to the anguished cries of those young athletes torn from their cultural roots,...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER TWO: Any Three Black Republicans with Ties to the White House will do

2007-10-04T12:53:00.000-07:00

It was as if the three falsely accused boys had been plucked out of a White House inaugural banquet: * Scooter LaShon Montague, Jr., 21, son of Scooter Montague, White House Chief of Staff, and his...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

CHAPTER ONE: Bull City in Blunderland

2007-10-01T10:26:00.000-07:00

If Lewis Carroll had written ALICE IN WONDERLAND in 2006, he’d have no better setting than Durham, N.C. There was a gigantic rabbit hole located in the courthouse. Through no fault of your own,...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

The First Clue: There's a Pony in the Bathroom

2007-09-28T14:00:00.000-07:00

As you may recall, Dancer #1, the accuser, told a number of different stories to the Durham police. In her ninth statement (memorialized by the lead detective in black magic marker on the side of a...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.

Switcheroo: Change the Race/Sex of the Characters

2007-09-26T12:24:00.000-07:00

How does the plot change if the student athletes who are indicted are African-American, the strippers are white and the prosecutor is female? How does the Durham community, the media and local...

Three innocent men, so little time to frame them. What's a prosecutor to do? Go to Bull City in Wonderland to find out.