Interstellar

Task Number 2

2012-02-03T20:38:00.004-05:00

Last week when I went to visit my cousin I took on the role as a weekly "reminder". This past week I have had to think about what is really important in preparing for a wedding. Last week we addressed music because I thought that would be a fun place to start but now we need to focus on things that may take quite a bit of time. I have been emailing friends and checking prices on cakes, music, and video. However, I realized that the most important part in preparing had no yet begun.

Last year my friends Brian and Heather Castellanos got married. Before they got married I got to see a little behind the scenes. They went to downtown Chattanooga for per-marital counseling and sometimes I would hear about their sessions.

http://wellonthesouthside.org/contact.html

When they told me that Mike Fulbright was their counselor I was a little skeptical. He wasn't married and seemed a little young. However, when Brian told me the kind of topics they covered I was pleasantly surprised. They covered topics on finances, communication, sex and love languages. His counseling style seemed comparatively thorough to the others I had heard about. By the end of the sessions they appeared to be ready for marriage and after spending time with the newlyweds I see the effectiveness of good premarital counseling.

TASK 2 -- Start Premarital Counseling

I think it's important to look for a counselor that the couple feels comfortable with. This week it would be great if they called some pastors or counselors and picked a person that they really liked.

2012-01-28T20:25:00.000-05:00

ONLINE COUNTDOWNS

This weekend I stayed with my cousin in Chattanooga, TN and she said that I could help with her wedding. I'm so excited I can't contain it! So there is a lot to do... I made a count down. Every week I will be giving her tasks till the big day.

TASK 1
Come up with the music for the reception.

My luck they have already started. I can't wait till they give me the list!!

2012-01-20T00:42:00.002-05:00

http://zerowastehome.blogspot.com/p/about.html

This lady inspires me!

What has inspired you this week?

Eat, Pray, Love

2012-01-06T13:22:00.003-05:00

This week I've had my first week as a Pro Presenter/ Researcher for the Hope Channel. If you have never visited their website here is a link http://www.hopetv.org/watch-now/watch-live-online/english/

The title of a Pro Presenter/ Researcher sounds fancy because it is. j/k :) I'm the one that posts the Bible verses on the TV screen so you (the viewer) can read along. It's been stressful at times because it's kind of crazy in the studio but it's been fun learning a new skill and meeting new people.

We have a light dinner ever night and it's been so delicious! It's usually a salad, soup, and fruit on the side. I've felt so healthy and have gotten a lot of the nutrients that I lack due to not eating enough fruits and veggies.

On Wednesday nights they will have a live show called "Let's Pray". I was so impressed at how the hosts prayed several times through out the show. It's been such a long time since I have focussed on prayer and trusting in God's power for issues that I can't resolve on my own. It was powerful and it has encouraged my personal relationship with God and with others.

Often I have experiences that make me realize that being a christian is a high calling. I moved to DC partially due to my relationship with Ricky. And to be honest that has put some pressure in my mind and as a result has put some pressure in our relationship. When I think about the Bible and what it has to say about love, no where it states that love is... pressured. The love of the world is fast but the love of God is constant, steady and most of all... patient.

In this big transition in my life God has never left me. It's been difficult but I can see how He is moving me forward and I need to put it all in His hands!

Politics Part: 3

2011-12-16T00:01:00.003-05:00

Last 2

Mitt Romney:

Mitt was born in Detroit on March 12, 1947.

Mitt married his wife, Ann, in 1969. They first met in elementary school when he was a Cub Scout

Mitt is not a career politician. He has spent most of his life in the private sector, giving him intimate knowledge of how our economy works.

When Mitt was elected Governor of Massachusetts in 2002, the state was in severe disarray

By 2007, at the end of Mitt’s term, the state had accumulated a $2 billion rainy day fund in its coffers.

After graduating from Brigham Young University in 1971, he earned dual degrees from Harvard Law and Harvard Business School.

http://www.mittromney.com/

Rick Santorum:

Former U.S. Senator Rick Santorum of Pennsylvania was elected to the U.S. House of Representatives in 1990 at the age of 32, and from 1995 to 2007, served in the US Senate.
Along with John Boehner and Jim Nussle, Senator Santorum was a member of the famous "Gang of Seven" that exposed the Congressional Banking and Congressional Post Office scandals.
He was also an author and floor manager of the landmark Welfare Reform Act which passed in 1996
Senator Santorum wrote and championed legislation that outlawed the heinous procedure known as Partial Birth Abortion as well as the "Born Alive Infants Protection Act," the "Unborn Victims of Violence Act," and the "Combating Autism Act" because he believes each and every individual has value and the most vulnerable in our society need to be protected.
He served eight years on the Senate Armed Services Committee where he led the fight before the attacks of September 11th, 2001

http://www.ricksantorum.com/index.php

It was nice being able to research each candidate. Each person has accomplished so much and are so passionate about creating change and helping our country. Picking the right person to vote for won't be as easy as I thought.

For more about tonight's debate and general info on all of the candidates check out: http://www.politico.com/

The 2012 Iowa Caucuses are scheduled to take place on January 3, 2012.¹

Politics: part 2

2011-12-14T22:24:00.002-05:00

My wish is that my generation will take their right to vote more seriously.

That in this time of crisis we will pick a leader that will lead us and our global community to a better future.

Next 2:

Ron Paul:

Ron Paul was born and raised in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania.
He graduated from Gettysburg College and the Duke University School of Medicine, before proudly serving as a flight surgeon in the U.S. Air Force during the 1960s.
He served on the House Banking committee, where he was a strong advocate for sound monetary policy and an outspoken critic of the Federal Reserve’s inflationary measures.
He also was a key member of the Gold Commission, advocating a return to a gold standard for our currency.
In 1984, he voluntarily relinquished his House seat and returned to his medical practice.

http://www.ronpaul2012.com/

Rick Perry:

Perry was among the first generation in his family to attend college, enrolling at Texas A&M University in the fall of 1968.
Perry graduated in August 1972 with a bachelor’s degree in Animal Science.
Perry took a commission in the United States Air Force. In 1977, Perry was honorably discharged from the Air Force with the rank of Captain, and he returned home to the family farm, where they grew dryland cotton, milo and wheat.
Perry won a close election to become the first Republican Lieutenant Governor in more than a century.
He became Governor in December 2000 when George W. Bush resigned the office to become President. Since then, Perry has won three full terms as governor.

http://www.rickperry.org/home/

Mitt Romney:

Rick Santorum:

I hope this is helpful. For a long time I didn't know how to vote or even be involved in the process. In the next couple of blogs I will be working on a "how to" vote. Covering registration and the Iowa caucus.

Let's talk about the P word

2011-12-14T03:34:00.002-05:00

Currently I'm in Las Vegas and.......

heading to the Big Island for Christmas.

With my move to DC and a new found interest in NPR I started to think about voting a lot more.

While on this break I decided to do a little research on these presidential candidates.

Michelle Bachmann:

In 2006, Congresswoman Michele Bachmann became the first Republican woman to be elected to represent Minnesota in the U.S. House of Representatives.

Constitutional Conservative

She is proud to stand with the Tea Party to call for lower taxes, renewed focus on the Constitution and smaller government.

Prior to serving in the U.S. Congress, Bachmann served in the Minnesota State Senate from 2000-2006.

The Bachmanns, who have been married over thirty years, have five children, Lucas, Harrison, Elisa, Caroline and Sophia. The Bachmanns have also cared for 23 foster children

http://bachmann.house.gov/Issues/Issue/?IssueID=4316

Newt Gingrich:

Born in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania

Bachelor’s degree from Emory University and Master’s and Doctorate in Modern European History from Tulane University.

Before his election to Congress in 1978, Newt taught History and Environmental Studies at West Georgia College for eight years. He represented Georgia in Congress for twenty years, including four years as Speaker of the House.

Newt served on the Defense Policy Board under President George W. Bush

Helped save Medicare from bankruptcy, prompted FDA reform to help the seriously ill and initiated a new focus on research, prevention, and wellness.

Newt and his wife, Callista, host and produce award-winning documentary films, including A City Upon a Hill, Nine Days that Changed the World, Ronald Reagan: Rendezvous with Destiny, andRediscovering God in America.

When you go to his wife's site... check out: http://www.newt.org/callistas-canvas/no-casual-fridays-for-callista-gingrich

A quote from the webpage: "

Yes, Callista is his third wife. Yes, she's 23 years younger than he, and yes, they began their relationship while he was still married."

Talk about weirdly honest.

http://www.newt.org/

In the next couple of blogs I will continue down the list.

Ron Paul:

Rick Perry:

Mitt Romney:

Rick Santorum:

Reality Check

2011-12-07T13:10:00.001-05:00

"I don't like babysitting!", I heard myself say over the phone while talking with Ricky.

Concern number 1: Not ready yet

When I went to my first day trial of being an Au pair all I could think was... I'm not ready to be a mom. The girls were sweet but the life style of a family, to be honest, just doesn't appeal to me. It sounds fun superficially but it's sort of brainless, boring work. Not to mention how they aren't my kids so it makes it that much more... just a job.

Everything her girls did was amazing and I could tell by looking in her eyes beaming with love and admiration. Kids are cool but I don't really get that whole... wow everything they do is amazing... look, they said blah blah... Look, they just jumped, ate, pooped. yeah... congratulations you have a little human!

Don't get me wrong, kids are fun and I think they are smart but the things I find fascinating are their curiosity and mischievousness. Things that I'm suppose to stifle on their way to adulthood. (They were extremely concerned with manners)

Concern number 2: Time

As we discussed the schedule I came to an annoying conclusion that even though she is a stay at home mom she is in desperate need of 11 hours a day of assistance. Wow! 7:15 in the friken morning till 6:00PM! Are you kidding me?

I value time and when you are telling me I need to be with you all day... that's a problem. I get it... you give me room and board and in return I need to give you my life. Okay master!

Also, this might be fun and interesting if I'm in France and I have nothing better to do than to make your family my life. But I'm not in France. I'm in Bethesda, MD. And it's nice... but not that nice.

At this point I'm not desperate enough to sell my soul. Thanks!

Concern number 3: Pay

On my trial day number 2... I went from my new location of Woostock all the way to Bethesda. It took me 45 minutes (10 dollars in gas). I arrived at 10 and watched the girls for 2 hours. Then they offered to take me to lunch. At lunch I took the girls to have their hands washed, cut their pizza and helped them stay calm while we talked business. Guess how much they payed me? $0.00 dollars.

They said they want this to be a give, take relationship... I think it will be a take take.

I originally asked for 415.00 per week. But they said that they didn't want to pay me that much because they pay their current Au Pair 375.00 and she has "live in" experience they added. I asked, "so she lived with a family?" And they muffled something about how she had experience with 2 boys... may have been relatives. Who knows... All I know is that they didn't respect my experience or degree. I get it... I don't have an education degree but I have worked for years with kids (from after care in FLEC, Camp Kulaqua, Korea, an Autistic child in California, to Sunday church daycare) Please!

Let's get real:

This family is willing to pay 375.00 per month. To assist a stay at home mom with her 3 girls. In addition they are willing to pay for room and board which on average it costs 700 per month. Not to mention payed vacations to the beach and ski trips! Financially speaking it's not a bad gig.

Also, they are a sweet family. The little girl at the pizzeria made me a picture of a potato latka and there were many sweet moments with them.

Practically speaking this would make sense if I was a student, a foreigner, a mom. I'm none of those things. I'm a college graduate in need of finding something that I'm really passionate about.

What was the turning point:

When I asked the mom what she studied in college she said, "International Business". I was surprised because I had studied business as well. I asked her what she ended up doing with her degree and she said, "I wanted to get into event planning and my dad knew someone in Manhattan and then I was able to get an internship."

The pity party for myself began and I started to have to think about what I really wanted and why I was so afraid to pursue it. This whole experience in moving to DC has been the best and hardest thing that has ever happened to me. I'm starting to get really picky. Partially because I'm with someone that is really honest with himself and he let's me know what's up. Also, because he is pursuing his passion and it's helping me pursue mine.

Job Hunt

2011-11-19T10:24:00.001-05:00

For 2 months I have been looking for work in the Washington DC area. After I quit BenchMark Physical Therapy my standards went to an all new high. Working in front of a computer for 8 hours a day made me go insane and I just couldn't do it anymore.

This move provided me with a great opportunity to search for something new. I debated between getting a Masters in Social Work or Education for a long time. But for many reasons I wouldn't commit. My student loans are still a heavy burden and I'm trying to get rid of it. Plus, I have a degree and so I should be able to get a job with my investment. Right? I thought about Coordinator or Event Planning but nothing went through.

Then I got desperate and I applied to LL Bean, Home Depot, Lowes, Nordstrom. I sent over 50 applications and calls started to come in for interviews. I went to over 5 interviews and I didn't hear back from any of them.

And then an idea.... "What about the being an Au Pair?" A few months before I remember Hannah Kuntz and I sitting in front of the Village Market talking about traveling to Europe. She suggested getting in touch with Helena Souders. I sent her a Facebook message about a month ago and she replied immediately...

Hey Stella!!!
Going as an Au Pair is great. It means you have a place to live without having to pay and food as well. They also pay for you to take French courses and give you spending money! If you have any questions I'd be happy to help if I can. You can also enroll at La Sorbonne, one of the best Universities in world and learn French. That can be an option but it is a more expensive one.

Anyways, hope that was of some help to you!

Nanny Agency Au Pair Work Child Care Jobs Babysitter Service

greataupair.com

GreatAupair.com - Child care jobs search. Hire a nanny, babysitter, au pair, housekeeping or senior care. Your trusted service for caregivers since 2001.

but I had decided to stay close to Ricky so going overseas was not an option. But then I got really desperate. I needed a place to live plus a job. I thought people only did this overseas but as I began the application I noticed that United States was full of options..... that DC was an option!

Creating a profile was easy. I created a profile and then I got a call the next day. An interview was set up and I went to visit the first family. (Full time working parents, 2 children, ages 2 and 4, living in Bowie, MD) Then I got another call and went to visit the second family. (Working dad, Stay at home mom, 3 girls, ages 2, 4, 6, Living in Bethesda, MD)

In the next blog I will talk about the process of picking which family.

Life is Hard

2011-11-16T14:38:00.012-05:00

I've become overwhelmed. Finding a place to live in DC has been one of the hardest struggles of my life. I stayed with Rika's family for a week. Then I thought I had found a place but the lady was wanting 450/month and a 450 deposit. It sounds cheap but handing someone 900 hundred dollars made me sick. I couldn't do it so I kept searching on craigslist.

Talked with a guy named Evan... sounded ligit. I went to the place with Ricky and it was a nice apartment. Hardwood floors and super clean. I couldn't believe guys lived there. He was willing to rent out his basement. No privacy but nice clean and temporary. I gave him 300 cash and he gave me the keys. I was so excited about the new place.

Came back around 11 and people were still up. The TV was on and the scenes on the screen were one of the grossest things I had ever seen. I tried to stay composed and then headed to the basement. I could still hear everything... I couldn't do it. I got my things, asked for the money back, and headed to my car. I had no idea where I was going to stay but I knew I couldn't stay there. I went to a Target parking lot and called Ricky. He asked me to come to his place but I was tired. I didn't want to go back there. I knew his roommate wouldn't like it and I was just tired of everything. No one was throwing me a bone and I was wondering where God was.

I spent the night in my car. I thought of how Ben Schnell does this all the time and how I would do it more often if I had more leg room. Where are you God? Am I supposed to me here? I should just pack and leave right? If you want me to stay you need to let me know.

At 7:00AM I called my aunt and she was really concerned. She was comforting and said she would do anything to help me. Then I started to cry. Not because I felt sorry for me but because I felt sorry for everyone else having to put up with me. I felt needy and it's an awful feeling.

At 7:30AM God showed up... Linda Matthews called Ricky and asked him how I was doing. She was leaving for a week and she had a room for me. As I walked out of Mcdonald's I saw Ricky walking towards me and I was overwhelmed with happiness. He told me Linda called him. "This was such a direct answer to prayer," he said as he hugged me.

Even after such a blessing I walk straight into sin and disobedience. I lose faith and spiral in emotional ups and downs. I say and do mean things. I become proud and stubborn. And I even lose hope.

God shows me who I am. The book of Malichi describes me to a T. Even though it's harsh and the truth the Lord still has a way of wooing me. He says, "If you come back to me, I'll come back to you." When I read those words I felt so loved. Hope and gratitude filled my heart. No matter where I end up that's one feeling I wish would stay with me forever.

I felt invincible

2010-11-20T21:30:00.003-05:00

What's changed?

2010-08-15T02:42:00.004-04:00

The Korean church was a place where I had been before I went Korea. It was a strange place with strange food. I went there twice in college and I didn't like it.

What's really strange is coming back to find everything familiar. How when I see the greeter I bow and say (an young haseyo)....... During the service how hearing korean is happily recognizable..... or when I walk into the kitchen how the smell of fresh rice and kimchi fills my mind with memories....

It's strange how a place so foreign is now the place I feel most at home.

Katie's wedding

2010-07-13T19:22:00.006-04:00

Here is the poem of the austrian poet read at the wedding:

But

At first I fell in love
with the brightness of your eyes
with your laugh
with your joy in life

Now I love your weeping too
and your fear of life
and the helplessness
in your eyes

But I will help you
with your fear
for my joy in life
is still the brightness of your eyes

GC Sabbath

2010-07-07T13:32:00.003-04:00

Recap

2010-07-02T13:56:00.010-04:00

Since I've went to california I started many blogs but never finished them. So here is a recap.

When I got to California God miraculously gave me a job working for a family that had an autistic child. It was such a cool job because I applied the things I had learned in Korea and discovered that when working with autistic children they learn english not by mimicking but as a second language.

This new information lead to me to rethink a masters in social work and maybe get a masters in education. I called Southern and started to consider going to La Sierra. I sent my resume for different jobs both at Southern and La Sierra and received no response.

I also began to get to use to living in Southern California but as the end of the school year was approaching I knew I needed to head to the east coast to take care of business. So I called Ray queen and he offered me a job teaching Model Rockets. lol.... I was really excited because I love summer camp. 4 years ago I had one of the best summers of my life and I wanted to relive it.

I debated whether to drive or to fly and finally I bought a ticket last minute. I spent the weekend with Monica and Ryan
and rode up with Zack to camp.
Once I got to camp I quickly realized that it wasn't what I thought it was going to be. The people I had worked with before had different friends and loneliness started to settle in. I wondered if it was a good idea to have come at all but as the spiritual talks helped me grow God showed me that he was right there by my side.

Camp wasn't quite what I had expected but it turned out to be really fun. There was a whole new way of doing things this year but I had a lot of good times with both the kids and the staff. I had many adventures.... from blobbing at night to deer hunting. It was fun to assist with taking pictures, shooting off rockets, playing extreme dodge ball, playing soccer with a blind fold on, making buttons, and swing dancing in the cave.

Praying for the campers after the friday night programs, spending time with God on the swing, and making sweet melodies everyday were my favorite parts of camp.

Being at camp made me realize how much I had missed Southern and how southern feels like home. After camp everything worked out for me to be able to be up there for at least 2 weeks. Since I've been here I prayed that if God wanted me stay for a while that he would help me find work and a place to live. This past Wednesday I went to Chris' going away party and there I met someone that set me up on an interview and at the "after party" a fellow classmate's mother offered a place to live. It all happened so fast that it made me nervous. Is this really what God wants me to do? or even... is God this kind? He is always surprising me... maybe because I have the wrong picture of who he really is. I don't know... all I know is that I'm happy to be here and I look forward to all the wonderful blessings He has in store for me.

My heart is moulting

2010-03-21T03:54:00.005-04:00

In biology, moulting (or molting,[1] also known as sloughing, shedding or for some species, ecdysis) signifies the manner in which an animal routinely casts off a part of its body (often but not always an outer layer or covering), either at specific times of year, or at specific points in its life-cycle.

We went on a late night hike up the mountain behind La Sierra the other night. Why did I say yes to Maira's pleadings? That I will never know but a certain crush on a guy (Daniel) was a definite motivator. A week ago I had met her co-worker at the ABC and thought mmmm.... he's interesting.

Mayra called all the guys she new for extra support but only 3 of them actually decided to brave the cold to catch a glimpse of the night sky and city lights.

We started to hike up the mountain and I was stuck in the back because of my short legs. Daniel stayed in the back and I became shy but tried to remain confident. He had a lot to share about his passion for music and I enjoyed listening. We talked a lot as a group and tried to get to know everyone but thought he was particularly funny. I giggled a lot I have to admit and I do that when I'm nervous.

After some sliding around in the gravel road and climbing through the brushes we made it to the top. We sat on huge rocks and took in the city lights. A spider all of sudden jumped on my leg and when Daniel noticed, freaked out, and began to stomp on it. I screamed because I didn't know what was going on and later laughed really hard as he got embarrassed for acting so scared.

All of a sudden I moved to sit next to Liz and I got really quiet. It's hard to described what started to happen. It was wasn't something someone said or did. It was this whole idea of being attracted to someone again. At that moment the first moments of when I met Jay came to mind. I went to the Collegedale church to pick up some sabbath school lessons and we just talked and talked for hours and time just flew by. I compared it to that moment and how it just didn't compare. I remember feeling nervous and being silly in our first date but I remember how easy it was to be with him and how the sparks flew.

Daniel noticed that I all of sudden got quiet and he asked what was wrong. I immediately came back to reality and tried to snap out of it. "oh I'm tired" I explained and turned around and laid on the rock. He came down and asked if everything was good and I pointed to the sky and asked him where the big dipper was. He showed me and I said well you see it points to the North star. He thought it was a cool fact and things went back to normal.

Fortunately on the way back we got into some heated discussion about the Bible. He doesn't believe it's absolute or any better than modern Christian books. I on the other hand got offended by the statement and tried to set him straight. We ended in peace but I think we will only stay friends.

When I got home I couldn't help but to analyze what had happened up on those rocks. Why did I have a flash back of my old relationship? Why did I idealize it? Why is this process of moulting taking so long?

I think when someone dies we forget all the bad. You don't hear people standing up at funerals and telling people all the horrible things a person said or did. They try to be positive out of respect for those who were left behind. Well no one died but I sure act like my ex did. To tell you the truth on our first date I thought that Jay was flirting with another girl and on another date he brought out all these feelings about how he wasn't over his ex. Clearly there were red flags but I chose to ignore them.

Now I'm realizing that our encounters weren't too different. In one moment when I saw clear differences and red flags I couldn't help falling in "love". Yet in another I didn't want it. Not because I'm holding on to the past but rather because the past is shedding and who I was is coming off as well.

In and Out ... Animal Style

2010-03-17T02:20:00.007-04:00

Today was filled with random fun. Mayra craved food from In and Out burger so we went. Liz, mari, Mayra and me got in the car and drove with the windows down with the sun shinning in our faces and the wind blowing in our hairs. The kind of wind that makes our hair fly everywhere and into our mouth. It was the first perfect Spring day.

It was my first time and I got really excited. I ordered the Animal Style fries which are not even on the menu. They have a secret menu and it's awesome how word gets out. They also hire only students and pay them 9 dollars per hour. It's a fast passed atmosphere and it felt really positive.

We sat and talked about canvassing experiences (pranks) , games we played as children (who has the hat?), and how spring break is around the corner. The food came and I looked at the mess and felt thankful it came with a fork. It tasted so nice. Comfort food for sure.

It was such a nice break from normal day to day stuff. I love the new things I'm experiencing out here and getting to know these girls.

Wed Night worship @ La Sierra

2010-02-19T03:08:00.008-05:00

We were walking around the track. (Nelly, Lavi, and me) We transitioned fast between topics while walking the track. Nelly's foot was hurting so we had a good excuse to take it easy. Social work has been a hot topic with us since both Nelly and I have applied to grad school. Nelly applied to Southern and I applied to Walla Walla. Lavi, my new Romanian friend, is an interior designer with a passion for people. She is really interested in applying as well.

We moved on to her hot date and why she was going to break up with the guy right after. Both Nelly and I just thought it was wrong since he is taking her to Medieval Nights and paying 30 dollars for her dinner. She feels worse braking off the dinner so she is going to go through with it.... even though he is not "the one".

All of a sudden Nelly said it is time for worship and asked if we wanted to come. I didn't but I thought I should go and see what it's like to have dorm worship at La Sierra. We walked into a dark auditorium with loud underclassmen. It surprises me to think I was once that loud and annoying. Really? Do they need that much attention? lol A video of a man doing some kind of finger rave popped on the screen. At first it was annoying and then..... mesmerizing. Not too much time passed until a pouffy haired boy on a guitar and 2 ladies came on stage to sing cheesy praise songs. It was surprisingly enjoyable.

The pastor came on stage and began with some lame joke about a huge cut out of a black basketball player that he saw on the side of the road. But then he started to talk about respect and I liked what he had to say. He described how a teenager got offended when he told him that he didn't deserve anyone's respect. I laughed because I understood both his and the youngster's perspective. We are only respected when we don't feel we need to be. The teenager had done nothing that deserved anyones respect yet he demanded it while God.... God himself came down and didn't consider it right to have equality with God.

Pride! It's a stinker and disturbing disease. He kept addressing how respect is not about showing off what you've got but letting it be discovered through humility. I try hard to show that my life is great. That I'm important. That I'm happy. It's a show a complete show. Humility brings us to reality and acceptance. The pain I feel and how it's okay to feel it. The lostness I feel and how it's okay to be here in the middle of no where. God.... didn't feel the need to show he was "happy", "important", or doing something super "special".

Later that night I read 1 corinthians 13 in my little Portuguese Bible. It was like I was reading it for the first time and God brought this to heart. Paul was describing what love is not and what love truly is. Love isn't showing off but it's waiting. Love isn't thinking only about me but it's about listening. It's something deep within us that can't just be seen but it must be felt. It starts in my mind and flows through my heart, down my spine, reaching the corner of my smile and the tip of my funny bone.

Presidents Day Rap

2010-02-15T18:51:00.000-05:00

Presidents Day Rap

Happy Presidents Day!

2010-02-15T16:44:00.009-05:00

When I grow up and have me some kids I will celebrate the most uncelebrated holidays like....... President's Day.
A typical president's day would go something like this:

*Wake up early and make breakfast in bed
*Invite the neighbors for a barbecue
*The decor will scream 4th of July
*Play games with them all day. example: President trivia
*hit a Pinata made of a President's head (of course we would only hit the worst presidents elected)

Today I don't have kids but I still get into the spirit. Yesterday Nelly and I found a Jello pan in the shape of the United States at Goodwill. It was meant to be. I got so excited and made Jello last night.

This morning one of my roommates woke up wishing a Happy President's day to everyone. Another roommate made a very special breakfast (I'm sure in honor of all the great leaders of this nation....not). And at Target I found an awesome book teaching people about the states, state's flags, their capitals and what year they were added. WOW!

All in all this holiday has been super special and very educational!

Nature boy~Nat King Cole

2010-02-10T15:46:00.007-05:00

I had just gotten back from Recife and I looked forward to seeing Pedro and my little cousin Bernado. I made my way into my cousin's room and there my little cousin Bernado was playing with him. His laughter filled the air while my aunt was trying to get him into the kitchen to eat breakfast.

My cousin Pedro is a very mellow 24 year old. Sometimes too mellow. He completely ignored my aunt's request and grabbed my little cousin and placed him on his lap. With his strong arms around his stomach my little cousin stopped squirming around and just sat back and moved his foot up and down the windowsill.

I watched my cousins intently as the world moved into the background. My aunt began to talk about something else but I could hardly pay attention to her. Pedro closed his eyes and smelled my cousins hair. He rubbed his cheek around the top of Bernardo's head and seemed like he was in a different place.

A place where love is understood and people freely give and receive it without any hesitation.

A Blast From the Past

2010-01-14T12:47:00.010-05:00

"Fix You" by Coldplay is playing on the Itunes I just downloaded on my sister´s computer. As the music begins the cords brings back vivid memories of Strawberry Fest 2007. It´s like it happened yesterday. It was the end of my Junior year at Southern Adventist University and I worked at Campus ministry with Andrea, Jonathan, Amanda, and Kessia.

Earlier that Sunday I had randomly met Jay at the Village Market. We chatted in front of a big window and watched people as they passed by. I pointed at the lady, who was pulling her cart out, and told jay that she was the lady that cut my hair. "She cut it for free," I explained "because I gave it to locks of love." He looked at me and then at the lady and then back at me maybe evaluating her work. He mumbled something about how it was cool or it looked good. Then he began to invite me to Strawberry Fest. I paused and thought for a moment. I felt nervous but said okay and asked him if it was okay if I brought a friend. He agreed.

I waited for Jay at the parking lot of the boy´s dorm and then a few minutes later we picked up Amanda at Wright Hall. I was comforted when she got in the car because I barely knew him at the time. We had small talk while heading to downtown Chattanooga passing by all the familiar places like the movie theater and the skate park.

We entered the convention center and I was excited. We stepped in a room filled with hundreds of people and it was magical. This is the only event out of the whole year where everyone comes together. The only thing I thought about next was finding a good place to sit and if any embarrassing pictures of me were going to be displayed on the huge screen.

Amanda said that there were some people saving some seats for us. We quickly found our place and I sat right in front of Andrea Keele. I sat and relaxed and waited for the show to begin. The lights turned off and the music came on. The screen was coming down and all of a sudden it fell back. Everyone was in shock and I started to laugh. Later I got the news that Zach started to cry at this point and felt bad for feeling any joy at that moment.

The show went on and it was a show set up for someone with a serious case of ADD. I loved it. There was painting while people were skateboarding and stage contraptions rose and fell all while pictures were being put on the screen. It was one of the most amazing shows I had ever been to because I got to see my friends on stage exposing their incredible talents.

We were all given glow sticks and at some point in the show people started twirling them in the air and all of a sudden Amanda got sprayed in the eye with glow stick liquid. She told me but I was so nervous that I didn´t even pay attention. Jay immediately asked her if she was okay and she said she was fine.

The show finished with a bang. People dressed up in funky costumes twirled huge paper balls and lanterns around at the crowd. It was an amazing feeling and this is where the song "Fix You" came in. I think this is how they finished the show. If I´m wrong will someone correct me please.

On the drive home we made small talk and Jay drove a little fast. I loved it. Maybe we listened to coldplay in the background.... I´m not sure. I became quiet and listened to Jay and Amanda talk. I watched as the street lights hit the dashboard and then accross Jay´s face.

The sheer ecstasy of being young and how it passes by so fast....makes me think how the end of my college career was a mere blur filled with fascinating moments capsuled in time with music, color, and beauty. I was so young .... we were all so young...it was magical.

Caruaru

2009-12-19T14:29:00.000-05:00

Recife

2009-12-01T14:43:00.009-05:00

The sun was hitting our skins and the heat in the bus was increasing. My sister Rubia (middle) was sitting on a window seat as I was standing next to her. It was at this moment that I was taken back to the hospital room where my mom was having an ultrasound. It was 1993 and I was determined to have a sister but as I walked into the room I was hit with the cold hard truth. It was such an exciting moment that was going to the change my life forever.

The nurse smiled as she squirted the jelly like substance onto my mom´s belly. I watched the monitor closely trying to figure out what the little blob on the screen was suppose to be. I asked with an impatient tone "What is it?" The nursed smiled once more and said, "you are going to have a little brother". "NOOOOOOOO!!!" I exclaimed. I felt a lump in my throat start to rise. Anger over took me and I left the room and slammed the door behind me. All my dreams were crushed. Why was God doing to this to me I thought.

The bus stopped upbruptly to pick up more passengers and I returned to reality. I looked at my sister and joy filled my heart as I realized that when I was 9 years old God was answering my prayers and that years later I would be blessed with not only one but 2 sisters.

P.S.
I love my brother so much that I wouldn´t
know what to do without him in my life.
He is an amazing gift from God.

A global community

2009-11-24T17:31:00.007-05:00

On monday morning I woke up early and went for a walk/run. The sounds of Nicole Nordeman and the fresh breeze from the ocean put me on a good mood. I walked down the cobblestone rode and was about to turn right when my curiosity made me turn left.

Spring is in full steam here and it´s quite a beautiful site. The trees have splashes of white, red, and yellow. And these colors help to brighten a neighborhood that always seems to be under contruction. As I´m listening to the sounds of Kari Jobe I look to the sky and try to open my heart and mind to the Lord. And then I notice something more beautiful then colors of spring; a blue little building with white letters on it saying "Igreja Adventista do Setimo Dia". My church? In my neighborhood? I was so excited because I never knew it was around here. Last year when I came to visit my dad I made no effort to go to church. But here it was. I crossed the street and I saw a man working on some kind of project. He saw me and I said hello and asked him when they opened for worship. His voice was high pitched yet quite sweet. He said his name was Leibino. I repeated it slowly and slaughtered his name. But he just smiled and repeated it again. He asked me where I was from and said that I was always welcome here.

Later that day I went back to the church. He gave me a tour and I helped him put plaster on the windows. It was a lot of fun and quite hard for me. The clay like substance stuck to my fingers and I couldn´t get it to stick to the windows. We chatted over my sloppy work and he shared his personal testimony. As I grabbed the sticky clay and put it on the windows I was filled with joy. It made me so happy to be part of this global family, to work with my hands and to put my fringer prints on this international effort to bring the second coming of Jesus.