The Frantic Scribe

#134: Another tough month...

2009-05-08T12:59:00.002-05:00

It's been tough. Not necessarily awful, but challenging.

Health-wise, we all got a touch of the severe cold/flu bug that's been (still) making the rounds. Plus, we're due to see specialist after specialist. I've already seen the rheumatologist and my primary doctor. Sarah's had her 6 month checkup. Christina's been to the pediatric psychologist (referred to by her neurologist), I see the dermatologist on Monday (because of 2 different skin rashes that my primary doc AND my rheumatologist are stumped on), and Michael (finally) sees the geneticist at the end of the month.

I think I got it all. Oh, wait...Michael's annual hearing test. That actually went OK.

And that's just May. Doesn't count June/July.

So as you can imagine, I am getting really sick of doctor's offices. The docs are all helpful and sympathetic, but I am tired of having to see specialists up the wazoo.

Money problems as well. In the process of settling a debt. I had to swallow my pride and ask my parents for help. I'm not exactly proud of that, but you have to do what you have to. Mom and Dad were surprised, but they reassured me it'll be okay. I've never asked them for any financial support since I got married. Robert isn't going to be happy...he's very proud, but sometimes...there is an upside to a large extended family. They do understand that there will be times you need their support, and are willing to help. (Unlike my husband's, who basically would kick you to the curb the day after your 21st birthday or your graduation party, whichever came first.)

Frustration on the home front as well. With everything that's been going on, hubby had the nerve to tell me that for some reason (fate? karma? life plan?) I always end up taking the hard road to doing everything. So I "chose" to have 2 autistic kids and everything that goes with it? I "chose" to have a chronic illness and a whacked-out immune system? If I had a chance to write my "life plan" before I was born, I was either drunk, drugged, or dreaming when I did it. That, or I'm a certified masochist.

I've tried to keep myself together with my artistic and writing stuff. Finally updated my website, and I now have a livejournal to post my fanfiction. (Runs like a companion to this one). I'll put up links in the sidebar.

I only hope I can avoid a nervous breakdown. Life doesn't completely suck, but it's starting to edge into that category.

Annie

#133: Mission, Spring Break Survival

2009-04-05T10:55:00.002-05:00

This week, the kids have Spring Break Off. My primary mission is to survive the week without going insane. Luckily, my friend Elaine (her older son is in Michael's class and her younger son's in Christina's) and I are planning to keep the kids busy with activities. Taking the kids to the playground, visiting each other houses, etc. Elaine's recently got an espresso machine from her in-laws as a gift. I'm SO envious. LOL! I joked that I'll be a frequent visitor, and she just laughed.

I'm finally going to put all my fiction in (relatively) one place...another creative blog with links to The Frantic Scribe, my works-in-progress, my poetry collection, etc. Doing a re-tweak of my art galleries, too. I've been wanting to do this for awhile, but real life keeps interfering, darn it! (Just kiddin'.)

Last weekend, I saw a couple of cute quotes in the most unlikely of places. The first one was on a tire cover of a little jeep that was being towed by a big RV on Interstate 77. The cover read, "Little Car pushing Big RV." Thought that was cute.

The second one was over at Tony's Pizza in Ballentyne. One of the signs above the order counter read, "If you are rude, discourteous or just plain cranky, there will be a $10 surcharge just for dealing with you." Oooh...I know the perfect story to use that quote in *evil cackle*

In any case, I'll put up new links to my web stuff once I get everything settled.

Annie ;)

#132: Manic March Madness...

2009-03-25T12:53:00.003-05:00

And no, this doesn't refer to college basketball...LOL!

Robert was in England and Belgium for a week on a work trip a couple of weeks ago, so I was alone with the 3 kids. Yay, fun. Michael got sick for 3 of the 5 days...I ended up taking him to the doc. Turns out he caught the stomach bug that's been going around. I get really worried when he gets really sick because he tends to refuse anything to eat or drink and gets dehydrated. We've been guests in the CMC Children's Emergency room because of that before. Luckily, he began to feel better before it got that far.

Robert had never been to England before, so he was pretty excited about it. He spent a couple of days in London (my hometown) and took plenty of pictures. Big Ben, Tower Bridge, Tower of London, the Eye, Parliament, Buckingham Palace, etc. etc. His coworker's brother lives there and gave him the tour. They drove through the Chunnel to France and Belgium, stayed in Belgium for a few days for work, drove back through the Chunnel back to London.

Speaking of international stuff, I've really enjoyed my weekly tutoring sessions w/Myeong, my Korean student. Last week, we talked about wedding customs (she'd never been to an American wedding before) and yesterday, she came by with her traditional Korean dress. It's really pretty, brightly colored pink and yellow, huge sleeves, a big bow in the front. I got to try it on. There are about 3 layers of material. You have to really watch how you walk in it, though, or you'll fall flat on your face. Myeong told me that in some traditional families, the wife bows to her in-laws on one knee...which is NOT easy in this dress. It reminds me of a kimono in some ways. Very elegant, but kinda awkward if you're not used to it.

(And yes, Myeong snapped a couple of pics on her digital camera of me wearing it. She said she was going to send 'em to me soon).

Another new thing: Robert bought a small Nissan Ultima, gold-colored, to replace the purple Ford Escort. A little nice car that actually works. He's mainly driving it to and from Davidson, so he wasn't looking for anything fancy. At least it's not a beige Ford Escort wagon. He seems pretty satisfied with it.

I think I've started reading about 4 books, but I haven't had any time to get back to ANY of them. Been trying to keep Michael out of trouble...he's been having issues as school lately, not getting along with his teacher. Robert was scheduled to observe what's going on in the classroom this week, but then he got the word that IR is going through another round of job cuts. Don't know who's gonna stay and who's gonna go. Holding my breath...they've already had a couple of rounds of layoffs. Not likely Robert will get cut, but these days, you never know.

Managed to put some work in on my travelogue project, and I bought a new set of Chinese brushes. My old ones were starting to get really ragged. Making plans for some new projects...IF I can somehow squeeze in the time to get to them, anyway.

More soon.

Annie

#131: It's SNOWING!

2009-03-01T21:56:00.002-05:00

Yeah, it's snowing, here in Charlotte, NC. It's not too unusual, but a full-out thundersnow blizzard...that's not usual. We've had some pretty bad storms since we've moved to Charlotte, but only a couple that have been really bad. In '02, we were out of power for 4 days. At least this time out, we still have electricity. I live up on a hill, so trying to get anywhere isn't gonna happen anytime soon.

Ice is the big thing around here, and Southerners don't know how to drive in snow and ice. Add the NASCAR thing around here...and it's a running joke that the first things to go from the grocery stores are bread and milk. Most of the area schools have canceled class tomorrow, all but Charlotte-Mecklenburg, of course. They always wait until the last possible minute before canceling class. But there's no way I'm sending my kids out in weather like this.

This will be Sarah's first snowfall...I wonder how she'll react. Unfortunately, the other kids have been fighting colds for the past two weeks. SIGH!

Mom called earlier tonight...she said that they've been having lots of rain in VA Beach, and it just changed over to sleet. They're supposed to get 1-3 inches. I know my parents aren't too fond of the snow, but Dad seems to take it more in stride.

Little more later.

Anne

#130 Catching up on everything...

2009-02-22T11:44:00.002-05:00

I've been so behind on everything, it seems like. I still have some art on the digital camera that I have to download, resize and upload into my various galleries. Blogs to update (like this one, natch). Facebook requests to look at, doctor appts. to reschedule, language lessons to catch up on...

Trying to take everything in stride, though. Coffee and chocolate make things a lot better, LOL.

Catch you in a bit,
Annie

#129: TAGGED, 25 Random Things about Me

2009-02-07T10:10:00.001-05:00

Here's some 25 Random Things about Me. A copy of it is on my FB page, but I'm also putting it here...

1) I'm British by birth, Filipino/Chinese/Spanish by blood, American by naturalization and Southerner by marriage.

2) I am a linguist, teacher, artist, editor and mom.

3)I speak German and English fluently, enough Spanish and Italian to get myself into trouble, some Japanese, Mandarin Chinese, French and Arabic. I'm learning Scottish Gaelic for a story I'm writing...my sister told me I'm the only one she knows who learns languages for fun. LOL.

4)I've taught all ages from preschool to adults. My favorite subject to teach is English as a Second Language. Currently I have one Korean student.

5) I write poetry, short stories, novels and fanfiction.

6) I once did Nanowrimo (National Novel Writing Month) and did a 50,018 word novel in 30 days. It's harder than it seems.

7) I graduated from VA Tech in Blacksburg, VA, and I taught for two summers at the University of Virginia. I'm still a true Hokie, though! :)

8) Big sports fan, esp. NFL. Favorite teams: Carolina Panthers (football), New York Rangers and Carolina Hurricanes (hockey), Miami Heat (basketball). Although I'm not a big NASCAR fan, I had to learn about it in self-defense...from my students. Hey, I live in Charlotte, NC!!!

9) I paint in watercolors and acrylics, draw in pastels and charcoal. I have my own art website, http://www.freewebs.com/creativeannie

10) I also have a blog at http://thefranticscribe.blogspot.com

11) Big sci-fi fan. Star Wars, Star Trek, Stargate, etc. I was mad that Stargate Atlantis got canceled, and BSG's in its last season, but cautiously optimistic about Star Trek IX.

12) Favorite foods: Chinese, Italian and Chocolate. Not necessarily in that order.

13) I love world travel. I'd love to visit Scotland, Ireland, Japan, China and Australia someday. And although I've got relatives in the Philippines, I've never been there. Yet.

14) I'm related (distantly) to Michael Copon (of One Tree Hill) and Liz Masakayan (an Olympic volleyball player and coach). My best friend (who is from Samoa) is related to Dwayne Johnson (aka the Rock) and knows David Tua's family (David Tua's a boxer).

15) If you looked at the playlist on my computer, you'd find a weird mix of: Jimmy Buffett, Billy Joel, Gaelic Storm, The Wiggles, The Backyardigans and the Imagination Movers.

16) That said, I think I watch more stuff on Noggin, Nickelodeon, and the Disney Channel than almost anything else.

17) I'm a sucker for desserts. And coffee. Lots of coffee. And none of that decaf stuff.

18) Favorite international desserts: tiramisu, English Strawberry Trifle and Tim Tams.

19) I tried Haggis once, but didn't like it much (I think because I already knew what was in it). Irn Bru isn't bad for a drink, but I need to try out the fried Mars Bars. Love sushi and sashimi, rice balls and teriyaki, but not nuts about pickled plums. And kimchee.

20) My two older kids have been diagnosed with moderate to severe autism, mild MR and sensory issues. They've had years of occupational, speech and play therapy. Right now, Michael's in a self-contained AU kindergarten class, while Christina is in an AU preschool class. Both of them are doing wonderfully.

21) Needless to say, Autism Awareness in one of my big causes. I'm part of a Special Needs Moms group here in Charlotte.

22) I've had rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia for 3 years.

23) I have a strong interest in Chinese medicine. I probably could be a doctor, if it wasn't for the fear of needles and the C- in Chemistry.

24) Technobabble, Technobabble, Technobabble. I'm married to a computer engineer, so I'm used to it.

25) I'm the worst morning person. I'm more of a night owl.

Annie

#128: It's lovely weather to be stuck here together with the flu...

2009-02-04T20:37:00.002-05:00

Listening to Bob Rivers comedy CDs. The title's from a song on one of his group's Christmas CD's called "Chipmunks Roasting over an Open Fire". Seriously. Talk about having a twisted sense of humor. Both Michael and Christina are coughing and have runny noses, thanks to a cold/flu virus. Michael's teacher told me yesterday that 4 of her kids are all out sick.

Today was a snow day...schools closed. We only got a dusting, but the bigger problem is ice on the roads. I live on top of a hill...I remember there was a HUGE ice storm in Dec. '02 and we couldn't get out of our neighborhood. People joke that no one around here knows how to drive in snow, unless you're a transplant from the North.

Spent most of the day watching Wiggles and Baby Einstein videos. Sarah really enjoys the Baby Einstein one...her favorite is the Language Nursery. She's laughing and smiling now. On Monday, we took Christina over to Sanger Clinic for her appt. with the cardiologist. All the nurses and receptionists were gooing and gahing over her and she's looking at them like, "Oooookay, what are you all looking at?!?!?" Luckily, she was really good during the appt. Christina still has the hole in her heart, but Dr. B wants to wait another year and decide if she needs surgery when she's 4. The VSD doesn't seem to slow Christina down, which is a good thing, but I wish that if she really needs it, that they'd go ahead and get it over with.

Joints still pretty bad, but at least they're a little better than last night. I can deal with the weather staying cold, but not this "50 degrees one day and 15 the next."

Sounds like someone's asking for the "24 Hour Mommy Snack Shack." Sigh. Catch you later.

Annie

#127: When you make resolutions...

2009-01-29T14:54:00.002-05:00

...sometimes it's really hard to keep 'em. Yeah, I said I'd be better at updating this blog and all my other stuff. Unfortunately, when you're a Domestic Crisis Engineer, you tend to get burned out kinda easily. Sorry about that.

Things here have been a struggle lately. Part of it is the fact that I haven't been well for the past month now...mostly sick and dealing with RA flare-ups. I actually had to stop writing for 3 weeks because of it. Now I'm getting back to my creative stuff, but it can be pretty hard.

In addition to all the challenges of dealing with 2 autistic kids who right now have some issues at school and home, one high-maintainance infant, and one most-of-the-time clueless and conflict-avoiding engineer husband, doctors who schedule things on THEIR convenience and others who think they know how to raise my kids (when they don't have kids themselves, natch), I think I've been hit by delayed PPD (post-partum depression). I had it after having Michael and I've been on meds. for the better part of 5 1/2 years, but there are days when it gets pretty bad.

People ask me how I manage to do things and I honestly tell them, "I really don't know." I have to resist the impulse to wall myself off, especially since my hubby is anti-social and his idea of a great weekend is to walk around the mall (without spending any $$$ if possible, BTW). I write fan-fiction, I do my art, and I study my languages. Right now, I'm wading through some Scottish Gaelic stuff (for a future story), even though I'm about as Scottish as say...Jackie Chan. If anything, I do like a linguistic challenge.

It does keep the depression at bay, but sometimes it can get really difficult. I usually don't ask for too much, but if you can spare a kind note or two of encouragement, I'd really appreciate it.

Thanks,
Annie

#126: My new New Year's resolution is...

2009-01-04T20:58:00.002-05:00

...to update my web stuff more often! LOL!

I know, I've been really bad at updating this blog and my website, but the subtitle to this blog is "Writing at the Speed of Life". Speed of life has been at more than 1000 mph lately, esp. with Sarah being here. She's doing really well, over 9 pounds and growing like a weed. She's starting to smile and bat at her hanging toys. Cute little kid, but then again, I'm biased.

Michael's going back to school tomorrow. I think he's had a really good break. He got a car racing set for Christmas that he loves, as well as clothes. Christina's birthday is also tomorrow...she'll be 3! Where has the time gone?? She'll be going to Tryon Hills Pre-K, the same school Michael went to, and to Miss C."s class...Michael's old teacher.

Still working on my art and writing, though I'm in the middle of a bad RA flare in my hands. I'm doing things a little bit at a time as my hands allow. I really need to go back to the rheumatologist, because this is really annoying.

Updated my website at Creativemum and I'm now on Facebook and Twitter, so if anyone's on FB and wants to be a Friend, let me know. ;)

More updates tomorrow.

Annie

#125: Frustrated more than anything else...

2008-11-15T20:01:00.002-05:00

Another boring Saturday night spent at home. Lately, that's all we seem to do. I happen to be in a family of homebodies. Christina doesn't mind playing in her room, and Michael loves his books. Sarah's doing really well, though she does have a touch of a cold. Robert's mostly on his computer...occasionally spending a few minutes with the kids.

I guess part of my frustration is because I'm always attached to one kid or the other. At least he can get away for 8 hours (usually more) on a weekday and have some adult interaction. Part of it is because I've become the ultimate desperate housewife. Part of it is all the chaos of getting stuff ready and attending meetings for Christina's entry into preschool. Then dealing with Michael's issues...it really doesn't help when I hear mostly pessimistic reports from his teacher. Hello...I KNOW he's done good things, why can't you acknowledge them???

Part of it is frustration over my art. It's hard when your husband controls all the finances, and although he constantly says he's supportive, he sure as hell ISN'T!! Everything had to be cheap, everything has to have a purpose. When you get an allowance of $40 EVERY TWO WEEKS, it doesn't even cover groceries. I'm tired of always having to sacrifice everything...my sanity, my professional career, my health. It really disgusts me when he acts as if he really does help because it's usually done with such ill grace. He's deluding himself...and gets really uncomfortable when I point out otherwise. He keeps telling me that he understands more than most men about what I'm going through...he doesn't really have a single !@!!!!!!!! clue. Oh, and he says, "If you want some mommy time off, all you have to do is ask me." Yeah, and what did I say about the ill grace? And not enough money for even a regular cup of coffee. Hell, I don't have enough money to send a fax to help ensure I get assistance for having two autistic kids!!!

And I don't have to get into the financial situation...it seems that he's been ignoring things and hoping they go away and he's concentrating on HIS own debts, knowing that I have no way of honoring mine because I have no income. It's really easy, when you put your mind to it, to ignoring things that really don't affect YOU personally. I tell him about things I NEED to do concerning my art, he "listens", says "yeah, okay" and promptly forgets about it. Then gets pissed/irritated every time I "remind" him.

I have my writing and my languages. Those seems to be my lifelines, esp. with three kids (2 of them autistic)and a husband with Aspberger's. I still cling to the hope that someday I'll be able to work in some sort of international setting. I'll be 35 next month...this is NOT where I expected to be at this point of my life.

I'm a housewife with dreams. Frustrated dreams, but dreams nevertheless.

Annie

#124: Two months later...

2008-11-01T13:30:00.002-05:00

It's been a busy 2 months...

Sarah Zoe Dameron made her appearance on 10/5/08, exactly 5 weeks early. So far, she sems a lot more even tempered than her other two siblings. Christina's showed some curiosity about her sister...she's touched Sarah and wants to play with her. Michael, on the other hand, doesn't much notice.

Christina's due to go to preschool in January, whrn she turns three. I think it'll be good for her, esp. socially-wise. Although she's made great strides speech-wise, she tends to keep more to herself. Michael's doing well in kindergarten---he went on his first field trip on Friday to the fire station and had a GREAT time! :) He loved when the fire trucks sprayed water out its main hose...and since they were close to Charlote-Doulas International, he got to eatch planes too!

I've been playing catch-up with writing, editing, art, etc. Sorry for the infrequent updates, but feeding Sarah every 3 hours leaves me somewhat comatose. (Ha!) Someone asked me if I was doing Nanowrimo this year, and I was like, "I hardly have time to BREATHE!"

More later,
Annie

#123: Lots of changes in a month

2008-09-01T19:03:00.002-05:00

VERY busy month.

Michael started kindergarten the last week of August. Can you believe my boy is going to KINDERGARTEN! So far, so good. I met his new teacher, Ms. S., during OPen House. She seems to know what she's doing and her classroom has plenty of independent work stations and sensory toys. The school also has a sensory room across the hall, with a trampoline that the kids can use if things get to be a bit much. He's adjusted well, though he doesn't have naptime, and he gets REALLY tired at the end of the day. The classroom aide, Miss Pam, has a 16 year old autistic son, so she knows what the parents go through.

Christina's going to preschool in January, when she turns 3. She'll be going to Tryon Hills, in Michael's old classroom. Until then, she's still doing speech and CBRS. Babbling even more and even trying out new things to eat! YAY!

I finally did it...I submitted two of my art pieces for the International House Art Showon Sept. 9. So this will be interesting. If you want more info, go here: Int'l House Arts Experience It's been a struggle though...I had to put my foot down with Head Honcho that I WAS going to do this. He'd already sabotaged my effort to get back into ESL tutoring by coming home late on one meeting night that I COULDN'T miss.

Ironically, he's taken more of an "interest" in my art website by "suggesting" I put my site where he thinks will give it more exposure, but he also wants to control where, and what kind of web store I'd have. I have a new site on Freewebs.com, Creativemum with a new logo and other features. Soon, I'll also redo my web store.

Things between us have been OK, but finances are still a very sensitive and sticky issue. Hence, the sudden "interest" in wanting my art to earn money. People have told me "You're lucky he wants to help." But his way of "helping" is annoying, not to mention he takes over with what HE thinks is best.

As of today, I'm 30 weeks pregnant. It's been a roller coaster...but I can say that although this pregnancy has been difficult, I'm looking forward to meeting this new little one. :)

More later,
Annie

#122: Rough times

2008-08-02T08:28:00.002-05:00

Unfortunately, we're in the middle of rough times. Most of it financial.

To make a long story short, thanks to rising costs and some money mismanagement from the the Head Honcho of the Family (more on this later), we're on a VERY tight budget. Earlier this week, our washing machine died on us. Since HHF fancies himself a handyman (and in an effort to save some $$$) he decided to try to fix the washer himself.

So this morning started with a lot of swearing and grunting as HHF dragged the washer outside to tinker with it...and I got to watch the kids like I've been doing all week. All for naught, for even HHF's superior (?) skills wasn't enough to fix said washer. So we're gonna have to do it all by hand. HHF doesn't want to go to a laundromat because we'd be there all day (and it costs $$$ of course). And we can't afford to get a new washer, so...

This is the same man who avoids all talk about our finances, even when I press for details. As a stay-at-home mom trying to do writing and editing on the side, on top of dealing with 2 special needs kids and expecting #3, I'm pretty much stuck. And he's somehow gotten it within his head that giving me an "allowance" of $40 every two weeks is enough to get by. Never mind that it's barely enough to cover groceries.

Earlier this year, he decided to go with a "debt consolidation agency" that turned out to be a fraud. They charged a "fee", but the collection calls and letters never stopped. Needless to say, I hit the roof when I found out about it (by finding paperwork on the kitchen table when I was doing housework). He'd never consulted me about it. One of my friends was flabbergasted...WTH was HHF thinking???

I am SICK and TIRED of dealing with this. I don't need this additional stress when I'm pregnant, but HHF is oblivious to anything that doesn't concern him directly. It's his way or the highway. And forget him helping in any other way...he's obsessed with a puzzle-solving site on the Internet. The only time he DOES help is when he's seeing me doing household jobs ALREADY, so he can claim he "helps".

I'm not usually this bitter or b!tchy. I've been accused to being "overly emotional" and "to get over it". But my life is a living hell right now, and it's hard to be optimistic when you're basically treated like a "slave-housewife".

This the the reality of being the wife of a man with extreme Aspberger's with an obsession of being right and being overly miserly. I know we need to save, cut back in these times, but STILL. I am a prisoner.

Annie

#121: The little things in life...

2008-07-12T09:16:00.000-05:00

The past few days have been pretty productive in lots of different ways. I've finished a jewelry project called "Chocolate Jewels": a necklace with a "chocopalette" charm and brown and white beads, hearts and squares; a matching bracelet and a pair of hair barrettes with brown ribbon and tiny "chocolate bars" from "Jolee's by You" scrapbook supplies. I'm going to take some pics and put it up on site later on today.

I also received my artist application for the "International House Arts Experience". It's an art show that's sponsered by IH and The Morrison Arts Initiative. If I'm accepted, this will be my first ever art show...so wish me luck!

Yesterday, I took my kids to Toys and Co., a store in Cotswold Commons, close to South Charlotte. They could try out some of the toys...Michael was taken in by a musical toy with lots of lights and buttons, while Christina attached herself to a rubber duck. (She's got quite the collection now. Big ducks, small ducks. She carries it around with her like a security blanket.). I saw plenty of toys that her therapists use and thought, "Ah, that's where they got them from!"

Plus, they sold little erasers. When I was a kid, I used to collect erasers. They were shaped like fruit, food, etc. The two I found (for a dollar each!) were both chocolate-themed (of course), one of a popsicle and one of a piece of cake. :) I was so thrilled! It's really funny to be so happy to buy something simple that reminds me of my childhood. I think I lost my eraser collection when I moved from overseas, but that doesn't mean I can't start it again, right? :)

So lots of things going on, in addition to "real life". Will update soon on other projects I'm working on, including my "Travelogue" collage and my "Inspirational" Collage.

Annie

#120: Updated website

2008-07-06T18:29:00.003-05:00

Just a program note...

Check out my new website, Creativemum at:

http://www.freewebs.com/creativeannie

and my new creative blog at:

http://www.freewebs.com/creativeannie/myblog.htm

I've added some of my writing on it, my art and other creative stuff. I'd like to start a creative community in the near future, so if you'd like to subscribe, let me know!

Annie :)

#119: Stop the World, I Wanna Get Off, Part I

2008-06-17T10:18:00.003-05:00

45I know it's been over a month since I last updated, but my world's been turned upside down...it has been a trying time, physically, mentally and emotionally.

I was sick for two weeks, around Memorial Day weekend. According to the docs, I had bronchitis that went straight to pneumonia because I have no immune system to speak of anymore. My blood pressure crashed, blood sugar crashed...I think my body just went on strike. I was in ICU for 4 days. Don't remember much of that time, but I know I was pretty sick.

And to top it off, I found out I was 15 weeks pregnant.

Fifteen weeks. How the hell did I miss the first trimester?? No symptoms, very light periods, and I'd been taking methotrexate for RA...which is SUPPOSED to actually do the opposite. So I've been recommended to the Carolina's Women Center because the pregnancy is supposed to be high-risk.

They've already done one ultrasound, paying attention to the brain, spinal cord and heart. MTX blocks the absorption of folic acid, so they were REALLY concerned about it...everything seems OK so far. The heart thing...since Christina has a hole in her heart, there's a good chance this one might develop one too. (We didn't know about Christina's until she got sick when she was 3 weeks old). We had an ultrasound at the Sanger Clinic and everything seems OK so far. The U/S only picks up major heart defects, so if she has a small hole, it might not be detectable yet. But at least they're watching out for it, just in case.

They did a complete genetic workup, and of course there's the chance this one will turn out to be autistic as well. I already have two, so the chances increase for this one. I'm hoping this one will beat the odds, but I'm also practical too. I suppose it's too early to mourn, but I'm really guarded. This PG was unexpected; we were planning to stop at 2, but apparently Someone Upstairs has other plans for us.

So right now I'm just at 20 weeks and at the "I'm getting large that it's uncomfy" stage. We survived a 5-day "vacation" in Dubois, PA with my in-laws, and an enjoyable visit with one of my writer friends in Pittsburgh. Update soon!

Annie ;)

#118: Some possible answers to my little girl's issues

2008-05-14T19:22:00.004-05:00

Went to the pediatric neurologist today, Dr. Dayal. A lot of my mom friends really like her and I found out why. I really do like her approach and style...very matter-of-fact and to the point. She examined Christina (and didn't seem put off by the fact she was screaming the entire time). She thinks there's definitely something going on...so she's ordered a sleep deprived EEG (oh fun) for the beginning of June. From what the records say and from what she observed, she thinks a big part of it might be anxiety disorder, so I'm going to have to call a child psychologist and talk with him.

With the family history, she's thinking something definitely genetic or metabolic is going on too, so she's also ordered blood tests. Dr. D. wants to start on evaluations, even thought we aren't seeing Dr. Spence (the geneticist) till October. She's very reluctant to put Christina on any meds. for anxiety because she's so young. I feel the same way.

But I'm glad we're FINALLY doing something. And BTW, I'm forging ahead solo. Hubby's attitude is "this is your department". So very little support on that end, but I kinda expected that.

Annie

#117: New Blog Set up

2008-04-13T09:58:00.003-05:00

I've set up my new blog Neurotypically Yours, Annie chronicling my experiences w/a husband with Aspbergers and 2 autistic kids. Now, this isn't meant to be a site to bash people with Aspbergers'...I have links to resources for Spouses of people with AS as well as people WITH AS. I'll also put a duplicate list of my Autism resources there.

See you there.

Annie

#116: The Harlem Globetrotters vs. The Washington Generals

2008-04-09T19:29:00.003-05:00

Now for something out of the ordinary...

I've never actually seen the Harlem Globetrotters in person...but I've seen them on TV. Just their names are legend: Curly, Goose, Meadowlark. Wilt Chamberlain was a GT for a period of time.

Tonight, instead of the nine billionth program on the History Channel or a lecture on the Science Channel, I found a telecast of the Harlem GT vs. the Washington Generals, in San Jose, CA. So we're actually watching something FUNNY!!!

NOTE: If you're too serious about basketball, don't watch the GT. Some of their tricks aren't in the NBA playbook. :)

I kinda feel sorry for the Generals. One of the guys who was making an extra point got his pants pulled down (but he did the same to "Special K" Daley, so...) and another poor schmuck got the basketball stuffed down the back of his jersey. Poor Special K got his knee hurt, but they have his backup, "Showtime" Gaffney on.

The Generals haven't beaten the GT since 1971, so this'll be interesting. I'll let you guys know who wins...

Annie

GT over the Generals, 62-47. Of course, there was the tense "are they gonna win???' in the 3rd quarter... after Special K got "hurt", but then he made a comeback in the 4th to help his team win.

And I love Special K's line to the (poor, much maligned, abused) referee: "Hey, Ref! Another call like THAT and I'm sendin' you back to FOOTLOCKER!!!" LOL :)

#115: Transitions galore!

2008-03-29T09:58:00.003-05:00

Yup, this spring is gonna be one of changes...a LOT of changes.

Michael's going to be in Kindergarten in the fall (he'll be 5 in May...OMG, where has the time gone????), so I've been getting up to speed with his transition into K. Here in Charlotte, your kid has a so-called "home school", but basically, it's a lottery as to where he/she ends up. Now, if you want your kid to go to a magnet, you have apply for it, and he/she may or may not get in. In that case, you'd better have a "back-up school." And you have the option to change the school your kid will go to, as long as your file paperwork before the deadline and...

Okay, confused yet? Yeah, so was I.

Michael, if he was a "normal" kid, would've gone to David Cox Elem. which is just up the road from us and I've heard is an EXCELLENT school...with an excellent PTA and parent involvement. Since he's special needs, and he needs to be in an autism class (not in a "mainstream inclusion class", since he isn't ready for it yet. I know he's not ready for a class w/25-35 other students with NO aide, there are THREE Elementary schools in my part of town who have self-inclusion Autism classes (AU). Two are relatively close to us, the other is actually close to Robert's work.

The transition meeting w/his teacher, IEP group, etc. isn't until May, but I'm planning on visiting the 3 schools to see for myself how they are.

In addition to all this, Christina will be 3 in January, and will be in CMS this winter, and CMS is ALREADY talking about transition meetings for HER as well. I thought it was kinda early...she's barely 2 1/2 years old, but there's been a lot of changes in the "Special Needs department" in CMS and Mecklenburg County, so...it's gonna be REALLY early to make sure everything's in place.

On the one hand, I'm like, "YIKES!!! I've got to deal with this NOW???" On the other hand, I don't mind getting it over with. Esp. since we're having some disagreements concerning Christina's various therapies and therapists.

She's been bawling throughout her sessions. For the past 6 months. Robert witnessed one of her "meltdowns" and talked with her case worker...needless to say, he was upset, and I have to deal with the aftermath. *roll eyes*

Connected with this...I've been active on the Aspberger boards...because I'm pretty sure hubby and father-in-law have it. It's similar to High-Functioning Autism, with some social issues, empathy issues, and other issues. It's really difficult dealing with 2 autistic kids, plus a husband on the Autism Spectrum (some might call it, "a third kid on the spectrum), but it HAS explained some of the issues we've had in almost 12 years of marriage, and it DOES give more evidence to my suspicions that Michael's and Christina's issues are partially due to genetic issues.

I now have another blog on Blogger, called Neurotypically Yours, Annie that deals with this other chapter of my life. It goes into how I deal with it (and how this affects my family) and hopefully will give hope and support to other NT (neurotypical) spouses dealing with ASH (Aspberger's husbands) or ASW (Aspbergers wives).

I've also been compiling my various writings into another blog archive: Wolfsinger's Stories, which will have all my scribblings in the same place. This will include poetry, my short stories and science-fiction stories on ff.net and elsewhere.

So yeah, a world of transitions in literally one month.

Annie

#114: Adding Tamiflu to my diet...oh joy! (sarcasm intended)

2008-02-27T08:41:00.002-05:00

There's been a flu epidemic in Charlotte in the past 6 weeks...

And I ended up in the ER yesterday morning. The diagnosis: flu and an upper respiratory infection. The cure: Tamiflu, hydrocodone cough syrup, lots of fluids, lots of rest...

I'd heard of Tamiflu before...it's supposed to shorten the time you're under the weather, and it's supposed to work pretty quickly. I was pretty much comatose yesterday with all the meds. I had to take (I couldn't stop all the OTHER stuff I was on). At least I don't have any horse pills to take this time out. My throat hurts bad enough; it won't take huge chunks of meds.

What the heck am I doing up and looking after the kids this morning then?? I need to take my meds. and go sleep for a few hours. Hubby has a really important conference call meeting for work, which he's on right now. So I have to keep an eye (and an ear) on the kids while he's doing it.

He's been home for yesterday and again today, and has been taking up some of the house stuff and looking after the kids. So that's wonderful. But you can't keep a workaholic away from work very long...

ARGH! I'm hoping this meeting doesn't last long, or I'll be sacked out on the couch before he's done...

Annie ;)

#113: Hanging on to Dreams...

2008-02-16T19:26:00.002-05:00

The title says it all...

I was working on my "Travelogue" project tonight. It's a mixed-media collage book on traveling and where I'd like to go. I use various stuff: stickers (both flat and multi-dimensional), construction paper, tissue paper, scrapbook paper, quotes, clipart, paint, marker, song lyrics...anything goes. And my virtual world tour includes places like Germany, India, Scotland, Australia, Japan, China, Mexico and the Carribean. Stateside includes places like Yellowstone National Park, Colorado, Missouri, Tennessee, Boston, Maine, Chicago, Hollywood and Napa Valley.

It's kinda ironic...that I'm stuck here while my soul wants to be free. But I'm still working on manifesting my dreams of being a world traveler by doing the Travelogue, keeping up with my languages and reading travel narratives.

Hey, what do you do to keep your dreams alive?

Annie :)

#112: New website and the Bookworm cometh!

2008-01-26T22:12:00.000-05:00

I've moved my website from Bravenet to Freewebs.com I was beginning to get really frustrated with my web presence, so I decided to see what's out there. I found a really great template and used it...a "book" that fit my theme of creativity and motherhood. So I've been working on the new site, now called "Creativemum's Workbook". Check it out at: http://www.freewebs.com/artistmum

It'll have some of my artwork and I'm going to add my collages and jewelry to the mix as well. I'll also have some of my writing samples up too, and a link to this blog. I'm also going to promote my site a bit differently than before.

Like I said, I've been trying to channel my frustrations with daily life in my creative work. And this weekend, I've finally finished reading "Eat, Pray, Love" by Elizabeth Gilbert. It's an awesome book! :) I can't wait for her sequel called "Weddings and Evictions", due out in 2009 (Check her site, http://www.elizabethgilbert.com)

Started reading another book called "Almond Eyes, Lotus Feet". It talks about the life of a fictional Indian princess in "traditional" India. It talks about Indian culture and customs from a woman's point of view. She also talks about "health and beauty secrets" that have been passed down through the generations. Looks pretty good so far...I saw in in Books a Million, but found a copy in the library, so I can see if it'll be worth getting in the future.

And on another note, I'm also reading a book on "Vibrational Medicine", an scientifically based book on electromagnetic healing (which isn't as New-Agey as most people assume). It also includes things on herbal healing, homeopathy and other alternative treatments. Having RA and dealing with constant pain is motivation to seek other methods.

Till a bit later,
Annie

#111: A busy---and frustrating---month

2008-01-25T21:12:00.000-05:00

It's definitely been a busy 2008 so far. I've been dealing with major flare-ups of my rheumatoid arthritis and fibromyalgia, and it hurts to type a lot of the time. Whenever I feel this bad, conventional wisdom says to keep still because the more you move, the worse the pain is. Actually, this is the time when I strap the kids in the car and go walking around the mall. I feel better if I'm walking around. Now, that doesn't ALWAYS work...sometimes I really feel bad afterwards because I'm tired.

It's also been somewhat depressing too. We're feeling the pinch of a tightening budget. (As my friend puts it, "What's more important---the gas in your car or your sanity when you've been stuck at home for 3 days running?") It's not only depressing, it's frustrating as all get out, esp. when you're a stay-at--home mom with practically no income of your own and completely dependent. The kids seem to sense whenever things aren't just "right". Christina has been throwing tantrums during her therapy sessions and Michael's teacher's told me that he's been "sloppy" in his independent work (i.e. he hasn't been focusing on the task at hand). So we're trying to improve transitions for Christina and making her finish tasks, while the teachers will work more one-on-one with Michael.

I've tried staving off hopelessness by staying busy with my languages. I'm refamiliarizing myself with my Italian and reviewing my Arabic. Plus, I'm going over what I learned in Linguistics 101...it's definitely a case where if you don't use it, you lose it. I finished my "Chocophoria" collage (using wrappers and labels of chocolate makers all over the world) and working on my "Travelogue" collage scrapbook. Since it's really difficult for me to stay in one place after a lifetime of traveling, this helps deal with it.

Painting's been difficult with my hands, but I'm still working on my "Chinese calligraphy" series and also painted "The Phoenix Tree" with metallic acrylic paints (I LOVE those things!). Plus I recently finished a pastel drawing called "Spotlight". My image editing software's on the fritz, so I've got to figure out what's up with it. (GRRRR...I HATE Microsoft sometimes. I've quit using Internet Explorer as much and switched to Mozilla Firefox).

Well, more later...I promise I won't wait a month before updating again (yeah, yeah, I've said that before, but...)

Annie

#110: Happy as a Creative Clam!

2007-12-28T19:22:00.000-05:00

Christmas has been great, creative-wise. I've gotten a drawing kit (with pencils, erasers, viewfinder, etc.), a mini-scrapbook kit, a sketchbook, pens...a lot of things to explore and try.

My mother-in-law and hubby pooled their resources together and got me a $50 gift card to Beadlush...Charlotte's main bead shop! (http://www.beadlush.com). Needless to say, I was pretty excited and I wanted to go there ASAP.

But my in-laws decided to bring us to Hiddenite Mines. It's an emerald mine in Hiddenite, NC, north of Charlotte and east of Winston-Salem. They're good friends with the owners, Mike and Dottie. You can actually go digging for emeralds in the mine, or sift through "seeded buckets" (buckets of dirt that are "pre-seeded" with uncut stones) with the water sluice, like the old gold diggers. And you can keep everything you find!

I found little bottles of amethyst, amazonite, jasper and aventurine chips. The bottles have a gold loop at the top so you can put it on a string and wear as a necklace!

I also found a genuine leather Native American medicine pouch (to be worn around my neck), adorned with a mini-dreamcatcher and feathers. :)

Eventually, I got to Beadlush and was in heaven. LOL. And I found:

1) a length of purple silk cord
2)eight tiny rectangular purple beads
3) one teardrop-shaped piece of malachite
4) a pewter medallion with a turtle on one side and the inscription "Sink or Swim" on the other side
5) Two wooden wolf (coyote?) charms
6) two small pointed wands of smoky quartz (for earrings)
7) two small adventurine ovals (for earrings)
8) one disc of blown glass of swirled green and black. Kinda reminded me of mint chip ice cream...
9) a cloisonne oak leaf (really Canadian, eh? :)

and 10) a cute, glass-blown turtle with a loop for a chain.

Enough to keep me busy, bad hands or not! Let's see what I can do with them!

Annie