Beauty Inside & Out

8 ways in Winning Back Trust

2016-10-02T22:40:00.000-07:00

Trust, to me, is a simple matter. It boils down to a pure essence, one that smells nothing like a rat. Trust is being where you’re supposed to be, when you're supposed to be, doing what you said you would do. In that respect, trust is just a series of repeat visits that coincide with the expectations of the truster, such that the truster doesn't have to be breathing down the other guy's neck eight days a week.

Trust is difficult to gain, but much more easily lost and almost impossible to win back. It can be lost through no fault of your own, such as by miscommunication or by bad timing. Another way to lose it is by getting sloppy and letting the quality of your work slide. Then there's losing trust by intentional deceit, like when Whitey Bulger informed the Feds that Howie Winter was fixing horse races. Imagine Mr. Winter trying to forgive and forget after 10 years in the clink.

A breach of trust is so difficult to forgive because trust is so vital to daily operations, and lifelong partnerships rely on it. But winning back trust is possible with the following methods.

Act early

Once you realize that you have betrayed someone's trust, tell the person yourself before someone else does. Put your hat in your hand, step onto the carpet and pipe up. Put some sugar on it and act humble. If the person you betrayed gets angry, take the tirade with style and make it known that you are taking off the cloak and dagger out of loyalty. In other words, grovel with dignity.

Be persistent

At first, you will probably be rebuffed by the person you let down. Even if someone says, "You're dead to me now," don't give up right away. If you grew up Catholic like everyone in my neighborhood did, you'll be feeling plenty guilty about your sins. Put that guilt to work by acting penitent. Don't let the last word be spoken in the heat of the moment. Go away for a while, and then come back once the initial anger has worn down -- the edge will be smoother a few days later. Look at all these cafone celebrities, for example. They make asses of themselves, then a week later, I see them smiling on the morning news while I'm trying to enjoy my coffee.

If you want to work in this town again, own up to your mistake…

Don't make excuses

This is especially important when the problem arose from something beyond your control. Most people have to gamble at times and operate in what my banker calls "the float." The float is when your account doesn't quite have the money you need just yet, but a check is in the mail, and you go ahead and make another deal as if you were solvent. You lie because business sometimes requires it.

The same thing happens with deliveries and timing. Let's say the bagman arrives much too late with the dough. In the interim, you have to cover the vacuum of missing money using your mouth. Promise confidently to fulfill your original promise. Deals fall through from time to time -- it's a part of life -- but when you have to tell someone that you lied, at least do it with clarity and dignity.

Learn from your mistakes

One reason Al Capone lasted as long as he did is that he surrounded himself with ironclad people who understood the meaning of omerta. If you are cast out to the east of your Eden, don't plunge into self-reflection; rather, learn from your mistake. Let your pride down for a moment so that the lesson gets tattooed in your brain.

Parents tell their kids to learn from others’ mistakes, not from their own. But anyone who has lived beyond the age of 40 can assure you of one thing: Mistakes will be made no matter what your intentions, just like history will repeat itself. Therefore, knowing that life will never be perfect, you should swallow the lesson of what it feels like to lose someone's trust and don't do it again.

Change your behavior

The person you betrayed has no compelling reason to believe your plea unless you show that you have changed. If the problem started because you weren’t paying attention to detail, then become a stickler. Perhaps you were spending more time chasing the girls around the maypole than working, so get back on the bricks every day until your feet hurt.

After a certain age, it becomes difficult to change, but a dire situation requires a new way of thinking. Plenty of guys have checked into Alcoholics Anonymous because they have lost trust. If booze or drugs are the stumbling blocks impeding your progress, figure out how to get out of that cycle.

Fix the process

Policies, traditions and routines are often flawed and prone to failure. If the system you are working in doesn't have the harmony of the planets, take measures to rectify the irregular parts of your business. Make suggestions to your boss about how to avoid having the same thing happen again. Sometimes it's only one trucker who is late; sometimes it's the whole trucking company. Cut the contract, trim the fat or do whatever you must to restore confidence in your end of the business. Rather than passing the buck and finding a cause for your misfortune, rethink the process so that it doesn't happen again.

Start climbing that ladder back up to the top…

Start climbing again

Keep your nose to the grindstone and your feet moving. Falling down a few ranks doesn't have to break your mind. A demotion is not the end of the world unless you want to roll over, but that's what goomahs are for. Wake up in the morning and start setting the world on fire -- but not like Frank Notarantonio did.

Get back up there

Regardless of how much remorse you feel or how willing you are to change, once people know about your temporary downfall, you will endure a period of sneers and jeers. So be it. In life, you might wash 10,000 windows, but people will only remember the one that you fell through. Self-doubt may eat at you, but if you work hard to prove yourself, the wisecracks will eventually stop. The betrayal will be forgotten by those knuckleheads, and the person you betrayed will begin to notice that you aren't such a deadbeat after all.

Courtesy of: Mr. Mafioso

askmen.com

10 Beauty Mistakes that Turn Him Off

2016-10-02T20:46:00.000-07:00

Eyeliner Overload

"The raccoon-eye makeup look à la Taylor Momsen is a big turnoff for me. All that eye shadow and eyeliner makes it look like she doesn't know how to use makeup, like a little girl." - Lawrence, 22

Makeup Mishaps

"I don't like when I can see a girl's foundation at her neckline. It makes me wonder why she doesn't like the way her face looks naturally, and it's clear she wears a lot of makeup. Or at least it's clear that she can't blend her makeup into her neck so that it's not obvious." - Alex, 31

Read the whole Tips here: Shine.yahoo.com

7 Ways to Look Taller

2016-10-02T11:23:00.000-07:00

Altitude has a lot to do with attitude, but the right clothes can really help.

1.) Select a monochromatic palette when choosing clothes. One color family from head to toe tricks the eye and brain into thinking "long and lean."

2.) Select pieces that won't break up your body into blocks. Women, choose a long lean dress, or no-waist pants and skirts; men, opt for thin belts the same color as your trousers.

3.) Go for well-tailored looks, princess seams and darts. A looser fit can often look wider.

4.) Pick vertical detailing: thin stripes, visible seams, interesting buttons and contrasting ties.

5.) Wear heels. The new square heels and stacked slides are more comfortable than stilettos ever were, so take advantage.

6.) Great posture is an easy way to add height, or the appearance of it.

7.) Lose weight if you're heavy. Slim will always look longer.

Tips & Warnings

* Today's simple colors and cuts are fashion-friendly for taller-wannabes. Knee-length skirts with similar-colored hose and shoes will help.

* Cuffless pants elongate the appearance.

* Hats, upswept hair, or anything that adds height will make you look taller.

* Lose the capri pants, calf-length skirts or anything that cuts your eye off at an odd or midlimb point.

* Avoid thick, wide belts or anything obviously horizontal, which will make you appear shorter.

Courtesy of eHow Fashion, Style & Personal Care Editor

How to Be Irresistible at Any Age

2016-10-02T09:51:00.000-07:00

Do you want to be irresistible? It’s quite simple. All you have to do is to be true to your own true character, and express that character in living. But how do we do that? How do we access the gold of love and truth that is buried deep in every one of us? And what is it anyway, this authentic character that is our true wealth and the greatest gift, really, that we have to give to our world?

Here are some ways to express true character

1. Learn from nature.

If you want to be irresistible, what better place to start than studying nature? Nature doesn’t seem to find it hard to be irresistible. Whether nature is being a daffodil, a tree, a hurricane, or the roar in a lion’s throat, it simply IS irresistible.

One of the things I love most about nature is its patience. Consider, for example, how a young tree grows. It takes its time. It doesn’t just try to push itself out of the ground by brute force, it spirals its way out of the ground – gently, but very persistently. I can say, after 79 years of living on this planet, that quaint though it may sound, this approach really works. It can get you through a lot of difficult situations, too.

2. Be still.

“Silence,” says an ancient Native Indian tradition “is the cornerstone of true character.” We live in a culture that is very oriented to doing and achieving. Nothing wrong with that, of course. But if we want to deepen our connection with our own being, with our own true character, we must take some time every now and again to simply be still.

“Be still, and know that I am God,” said the Psalmist, and the words are the compass of my life.

The interesting thing is that sometimes, a few moments consciously “not doing” can actually increase our creativity and productivity no end. It can also help us in connecting more deeply with our own inner wisdom. History is full of tales of famous people who had their “breakthrough” moments when, strangely enough, they weren’t doing anything. In fact they may have given up on their project altogether.

3. Be persistent.

I recently created a course on the theme of “happy aging” that I’m offering at my blog on May 23 entitled “How to look (and feel) 10 years younger: The true promise and potential of aging.” I share my own experience that aging is nothing to fear, but can be a door to true meaning and happiness at any age. And I share how though our physical form ages, our unconquerable spirit never grows old.

I can tell you that finishing “The True Promise and Potential of Aging” over the last few months with serious help from Mary Jaksch of the A-List Blogger Club has been like giving birth.

It’s called for every ounce of persistence that is in me. Please don’t give up on any true and worthwhile endeavor in which you may be engaged. Don’t give up on a single one of your dreams or goals, if they are true dreams and true goals. We live in a benevolent universe and all you need is persistence and a little wisdom and your dreams will come true.

4. Value little moments as much as big ones.

When we are expressing true character we appreciate the little moments of life and care for them to the best of our ability just as much as we honor the “big” moments.

I used to marvel at how my mentor, Martin, would take so much care with cutting his lawn or fixing a broken toilet. Walking into a coffee shop, for example, or into a food market, listening to a stream or watching children at play – it’s all an opportunity to step back from our conditioned existence and celebrate the joy and spontaneity of life.

5. Love balance.

We live in a loving universe that relies on balance. If we would be true to our own true character we too must love balance and seek balance at all times. For example, it seems paradoxical, but only the strong can be gentle. And although I find great delight, especially as I get older, in sometimes simply sitting in a chair doing nothing, life demands action and creativity too.

6. Be interested in other people.

If you really want to be irresistible, be genuinely interested in what someone else is interested in. If you can find out what makes someone excited or happy – their eyes will glow and friendship will flow.

7. Be kind.

Be kind to yourself and others. Sometimes, caught up in some important task, we put undue pressure on ourselves or another. It’s important to be kind and gracious to everything and everyone we meet. It is not weak to be kind. It is a mark of true character — it reveals the love at the core of our being. [LINK]

True Love is Neither Physical, Nor Romantic

2016-10-02T06:15:00.000-07:00

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80's arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb.

He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him.
I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, to evaluate his wound.
On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.
While doing so, I asked if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.
He told me that she had been there for awhile and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease. As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late.
He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now. I was surprised, and asked, "And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?"
He smiled as he patted my hand and said, "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is."
I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, "That is the kind of love I want in my life."
True love is neither physical, nor romantic.
True love is an acceptance.of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

Oh, by the way, peace is seeing a sunset and knowing who to thank.
The happiest people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they.just make the best of everything they have.

I hope you share this with someone you care about. I just did.
" Life isn't about how to survive the storm, but how to dance in the rain."
-
-

5 Mistakes Women Make With Men

2014-06-03T09:15:00.000-07:00

For some women, sustaining a worthwhile relationship with a man is almost like trying to win the lottery. They have no trouble talking to men or even dating them, but for whatever reason they can not build enough attraction from their partners to keep them coming back for more. Here are some mistakes women make that can send a man running in the opposite direction.

Too Much Information
While it is important to get to know the person you are dating, some women simply don’t leave enough to the imagination. If you find yourself talking about family problems and old boyfriends on your first few dates, then chances are that you are guilty of revealing too much. The initial period of dating should be absolute bliss for both sides, and not dragged down by skeletons in the closet.

Not Enough Listening
It can be refreshing to meet new people and have the opportunity to share your opinions and dreams, just remember that your new man is also excited to the same. Taking control of the conversation or forcing your ideals on someone is not romantic. Make sure you provide adequate openings in your dialogue for responses. A simple way to make sure you are not taking over the spotlight is to ask your date questions. This will give them a chance to share their feelings without interrupting you.

Dishonesty
Some women become so self-conscious about themselves that they stretch the truth about everything from finances to outside interests. They want so badly to attract a good man that they believe saying what he wants to hear is the easiest route to take. Of course this strategy may work for the first few dates, but ultimately the truth will come out and you will be exposed. Being honest keeps your conscience clear and will help you meet someone with the same interests as you.

High Expectations
It is natural to be excited about the prospect of new love, but you have to be careful not to let expectations spoil the fun. Guys don’t want to hear about your plans for marriage and family life early in a relationship. You have to attract them with your personality and charm before they will even consider a second date. The bottom line is to let things progress naturally. Not only can expectations eliminate a perfectly suitable candidate, but they take the spontaneity out of romance.

Controlling Yourself
The big secret to making a man want you is creating a curiosity or mystery about yourself. You want him to fantasize about you and wonder which direction your romance will take him. For this reason you need to lead him along slowly. Control your passions and keep him coming back for more. Be patient to see if he will wait for you. If he does then you know you have the beginning of a strong attraction.

There is good reason why some women consistently falter with men while others seem to catch them like fish. It is all about presentation and focusing on the natural male desires. This means making him feel good about himself and keeping him guessing on what your next move will be. Avoiding mistakes like talking too much and creating ridiculous expectations will give you the opportunity to set this strategy in motion.

By: Elliot Beers
http://attractyourman.com

Negative People - Better To Avoid !

2014-01-26T13:00:00.000-08:00

This is a very realistic situation all of us face in our day to day life. As the story illustrates, we should tend to ignore such people and their prattle and pay them back as the lady in the story did.

This is something to think about when negative people are doing their best to rain on your parade. So remember this story the next time someone who knows nothing, and cares less, tries to make your life miserable.

A woman was at her hair dresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband.
She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:
Rome ? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty. You're crazy to go to Rome.

So, how are you getting there?'
'We're taking Continental,' was the reply. 'We got a great rate!'

'Continental?' exclaimed the hairdresser. 'That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly , and they're always late.

So, where are you staying in Rome ?'

'We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome 's Tiber River called Teste.'

'Don't go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks it's gonna be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump, the worst hotel in the city! The rooms are small, the service is surly, and they're overpriced.

So, whatcha' doing when you get there?'

'We're going to go to see the Vatican and we hope to see the Pope.'

'That's rich ,' laughed the hairdresser. 'You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant.

Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it.'

A month later, the woman again came in for a hairdo. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome .

'It was wonderful,' explained the woman, 'not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it was overbooked, and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome 28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot.

And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $ 5 million remodeling job, and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city They, too, were overbooked, so they apologized and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge!'

'Well,' muttered the hairdresser, 'that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope.'

'Actually, we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican, a Swiss Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me.

Sure enough, five minutes later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me.'

'Oh, really! What 'd he say ?'
He said: 'Where'd you get the shitty Hairdo?
-

Keep That Natural Beauty Look Forever

2013-11-01T09:23:00.000-07:00

Sophia Loren is a great example of an aging star who still would be considered as one the most beautiful women in the world. You too can keep that natural beauty look forever.

A lot has been written about natural beauty and most articles talk about natural beauty being related to drinking water, eating fresh fruits and vegetables, taking vitamins, exercising, and so on. It is commonly said that natural beauty look starts from within.
While mature natural beauty is a complicated and detailed subject, an in depth review of the literature really boils it down to the following items.

1. Not drinking coffee, and certainly not to an excess, is a major contributor to long-lasting natural beauty. Drink tea instead, which actually promotes healthy collagen and a youthful look.

2. Using all-natural cosmetics and enhancers.

3. If you want to have natural beauty and have the look last forever, avoid, avoid, avoid direct sun on your skin. Always wear a hat or other skin covering to protect the skin's collagen. Never leave the house without at least SPF 8-15 that protects from all of the sun's harmful rays.

4. Not smoking may be the most significant thing you can do to enhance natural beauty. As we know, smoking has a number of other critical health issues as well.

5. Eat healthy and natural beauty will enhance mature natural beauty over your lifetime. We all know not to eat deep-fried greasy foods, an excess of meat, and foods high in sugar and poor carbohydrates. Recent studies indicate the two most significant factors leading to premature skin aging are cigarette smoking and drinking coffee. In order to keep that natural beauty look forever, avoiding the direct sunlight is an absolute must.
Direct sunlight, in combination with smoking and coffee, are a guaranteed recipe for early age skin wrinkling, puffiness, and rough texture. To keep that natural beauty look forever, it is imperative, even while we are young, to carefully plan for our later years.

While we probably all should have started all of the above items sooner in our lives, we can improve our natural beauty immediately by embracing the five steps to mature natural beauty.
All natural anti-aging skin care cream, lotions, acne treatments, sun block enhance the natural beauty tips and advice so readily given. While healthy skin does start withinPsychology Articles, anti-aging skin care products are the final touch.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR John Russell of IH Distribution, LLC brings you health, anti-aging and skin care products from around the world. Find fabulous skin care tips and great articles on a wide range of topics for women at http://www.hormones-beauty-health.com or our Skin Care Blog

How's your posture?

2013-11-01T06:54:00.000-07:00

Want to feel good about your work, your family . . . yourself? Try picking up that chin and pulling back those shoulders. That's right -- carry yourself with confidence. Studies have found that people who consciously improve their posture actually end up improving their self-esteem. When you carry yourself with confidence, not only do you feel better about yourself, but you make a better impression on other people, too. You know, like that new boss you're dying to impress. If you’ve ever spent time sitting slouched on the couch with your laptop or had to live through a long night curled up like a worm on your bed staring into the screen, you will probably feel pain. Unfortunately, with time, it gets worse, tight neck will turn into a chronic back problem, and sore eyes will lead to myopia. But does this mean you have to kick out your brand new 1000£ machine? Not yet. But if you plan to use a laptop as your primary computer, it does mean that you will need to start taking some steps right now to prevent stress and strain:

Elevate the screen so that you don’t have to bend your neck and back

Try to sit straight, pay attention to your posture

Learn to set up your work station correctly, use external mouse and keyboard if possible, take regular breaks, stretch your body

If you still feel aches and pains- get rid of it before it kills you !!

-
-

5 Lessons The Way We Treat People

2013-05-26T10:46:00.000-07:00

1st - Cleaning Lady...

During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one: "What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?" Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question

blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. "Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello." I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.

2nd - Pickup in the Rain...

One night, at 11:30 p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabamahighway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car. A young white man stopped to help her, generally unheard of in those conflict-filled 60s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance and put her into a taxicab. She seemed t o be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him. Seven days went by and a knock came on the man's door. To his surprise, giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attachedÂ... It read: "Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed awayÂ... God bless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others." Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.

3rd - Always Remember those who Serve...

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him. "How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked. "Fifty cents," replied the waitress. The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it. "Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient. "Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied. The little boy again counted his coins. "I'll have the plain ice cream," he said. The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table. There, placed neatly beside the empty dish, were two nickels and five pennies.. You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.

4th - The Obstacle in Our Path...

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed the King for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way. Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a note from the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand! Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improve our condition.

5th - Giving When it Counts...

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz who was suffering from a rare &serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat the illness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister. I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away". Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.

"Work like you don't need the money,
love like you've never been hurt, and
dance like you do when nobody's watching."

10 Ways to Start Taking Control of Your Life

2013-05-13T07:00:00.000-07:00

At first glance, it would seem that positive thinking and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) have nothing to do with one another. But many of us with ADD develop negative thinking patterns because we become frustrated by our challenges and frequent feelings of being overwhelmed. This negative outlook then makes it even harder for us to manage those challenges and move forward.

Practicing positive thinking allows people with ADD to focus on our strengths and accomplishments, which increases happiness and motivation. This, in turn, allows us to spend more time making progress, and less time feeling down and stuck. The following tips provide practical suggestions that you can use to help you shift into more positive thinking patterns:

1. Take Good Care of Yourself . It's much easier to be positive when you are eating well, exercising, and getting enough rest.

2. Remind Yourself of the Things You Are Grateful For. Stresses and challenges don't seem quite as bad when you are constantly reminding yourself of the things that are right in life. Taking just 60 seconds a day to stop and appreciate the good things will make a huge difference.

3. Look for the Proof Instead of Making Assumptions. A fear of not being liked or accepted sometimes leads us to assume that we know what others are thinking, but our fears are usually not reality. If you have a fear that a friend or family member's bad mood is due to something you did, or that your co-workers are secretly gossiping about you when you turn your back, speak up and ask them. Don't waste time worrying that you did something wrong unless you have proof that there is something to worry about.

4. Refrain from Using Absolutes. Have you ever told a partner "You're ALWAYS late!" or complained to a friend "You NEVER call me!"? Thinking and speaking in absolutes like 'always' and 'never' makes the situation seem worse than it is, and programs your brain into believing that certain people are incapable of delivering.

5. Detach From Negative Thoughts. Your thoughts can't hold any power over you if you don't judge them. If you notice yourself having a negative thought, detach from it, witness it, and don't follow it.

6. Squash the "ANTs". In his book "Change Your Brain, Change Your Life," Dr. Daniel Amen talks about "ANTs" - Automatic Negative Thoughts. These are the bad thoughts that are usually reactionary, like "Those people are laughing, they must be talking about me," or "The boss wants to see me? It must be bad!" When you notice these thoughts, realize that they are nothing more than ANTs and squash them!

7. Practice Lovin', Touchin' & Squeezin' (Your Friends and Family) . You don't have to be an expert to know the benefits of a good hug. Positive physical contact with friends, loved ones, and even pets, is an instant pick-me-up. One research study on this subject had a waitress touch some of her customers on the arm as she handed them their checks. She received higher tips from these customers than from the ones she didn't touch!

8. Increase Your Social Activity. By increasing social activity, you decrease loneliness. Surround yourself with healthy, happy people, and their positive energy will affect you in a positive way!

9. Volunteer for an Organization, or Help another Person. Everyone feels good after helping. You can volunteer your time, your money, or your resources. The more positive energy you put out into the world, the more you will receive in return.

10. Use Pattern Interrupts to Combat Rumination. If you find yourself ruminating, a great way to stop it is to interrupt the pattern and force yourself to do something completely different. Rumination is like hyper-focus on something negative. It's never productive, because it's not rational or solution-oriented, it's just excessive worry. Try changing your physical environment - go for a walk or sit outside. You could also call a friend, pick up a book, or turn on some music.

When it comes to the corporate world, protocol is pretty much the religion. To know the things needed to do are the basics of productivity, but interaction and having a steady mind makes up the entire thing to true productivity. There are those who seem to work well even under pressure, but they're uncommon ones and we are human and imperfect. To get these little things like stress under our skins won't solve our problems. Sometimes it takes a bit of courage to admit that we're turning to be workaholics than tell ourselves that we're not doing our best.

By: Phyllis Wasserman

The 8 Habits of Healthy Living

2013-05-02T07:00:00.000-07:00

1. Stop smoking. This is by far the most important habit, as it affects almost every single one of the leading causes of death. It’s also the hardest of these habits to change. It’s not at all impossible — I quit six years ago next month.

2. Lose weight (if you’re overweight). This is not exactly a habit — the best habit to form to lose weight is to eat less. Or eat more of things that don’t have a lot of calories, like fruits and veggies. Being overweight is just below smoking the worst risk factor for many diseases.

3. Exercise. You don’t need me to tell you to exercise, but listen to this: lack of exercise is a major risk factor for heart disease, stroke, colon & rectal cancers, diabetes, breast cancer, high blood pressure and high cholesterol. If you don’t exercise, you’re just asking to get a major disease. It’s almost a magic pill: do a bit of exercise every day, and you get healthy. You don’t need much — start with 5 minutes a day in the morning.

4. Drink only in moderation. Heavy drinking is one of the worst risk factors for many diseases. That’s more than 2 drinks of alcohol a day for men, and more than 1 drink for women. A glass of red wine is a good thing, but too many and you’re greatly increasing your risk of disease.

5. Cut out red & processed meats. Eating red meats, and processed meats like sausages, bacon, canned meats and so on, is a risk factor for colon/rectal cancer, stomach cancer, and high cholesterol, which in turn is a leading risk factor for coronary heart disease and stroke. While this won’t sit well with many people, the overwhelming mass of research supports this. I recommend going vegetarian.

6. Eat fruits & veggies. This is obvious, but it’s amazing how few veggies most people eat. Eating fruits and veggies reduces your risk of several leading diseases, and it’s one of the easiest habits to form. Eat a salad (without heavy dressings, bacon or other meats, croutons or cheese), add veggies to soups or veggie chili, cook up veggies as a healthy side dish with dinner or lunch. Eat fruits with breakfast and as snacks.

7. Reduce salt, and saturated/trans fats. Salt and saturated or trans fats are in so many processed or prepared foods, and they increase risks of high blood pressure and high cholesterol, which increase risk for heart disease and stroke. Despite what the Weston Price Foundation and other people on the Internet tell you, saturated fat isn’t healthy — read the sources. Note that this isn’t a controversy in the medical community, but the “harmlessness” of saturated fats is perpetuated by the diary and meat industries, and lay writers like Gary Taube. Cook your own healthy meals instead of eating out or eating prepared foods.

8. Reduce stress. Stress is a risk factor for heart disease and high blood pressure, which is itself a risk factor for stroke. Simplify your workday so that you’re not overly stressed, and exercise to relieve stress.

[ LINK ]

5 Ways to have a Healthy Hair

2013-03-29T00:08:00.000-07:00

Nowadays, not only women but men too are willing to pay any amount of money for finding out the secret behind healthy hair. Irrespective of the type of hair you are born with, follow these 5 tips and see the results yourself: healthy and luxurious hair.

1) Diet: Healthy hair beings with your body. Dark green vegetables such as spinach and broccoli are an excellent source of vitamin A and vitamin C which is needed to produce sebum, the body’s natural hair conditioner. Coconut is also considered as an excellent food for hair. Dairy products such as fresh yoghurts and milk not only strengthen your hair but also add shine to it. Avoid processed and canned foods as they are not really helpful in providing nutrition to your hair. If you maintain a healthy, balanced diet then there’s nothing that can stop you from achieving healthy, happy hair.

2) Hairbrush Usage : Brushing your hair before shampooing is essential as it stimulates the scalp and promotes blood flow. It also helps in removing scalp flakes and product buildup. Moreover, do not brush your hair when it’s wet as this causes unnecessary breakage and damages hair. Avoid using plastic, metal and nylon brushes as they attack and break the hair cuticle. Finally, brushing your hair regularly will keep it looking healthy and glossy.

3) Blow Drying: Avoid blow-drying your hair as it can make your hair brittle and cause split-ends. Squeeze the water out with a towel and let it dry naturally. If you must use a hair dryer then keep it at the lowest setting possible. Similarly, steer clear of hair straightners and curling irons.

4) Stress: Stress can have extremely adverse long-term effects on both the quality and the color of your hair. Learn to manage your time well and keep mental pressure at a minimum level. Practice meditation as it is an effective relaxation technique. And last but not the least, get adequate amount of peaceful sleep.

5) Oiling and conditioning: Treat your hair to deep conditioning once every two weeks. They strengthen your hair and protect it against breakage as they penetrate the hair shaft. A warm oil scalp massage twice or thrice a week will also help to keep hair moisturized. Leave it on overnight, if not, then at least for an hour or two before shampooing your hair. Regular oiling and conditioning not only result in lustrous, healthy hair but also help in preventing hair loss.

Post blog by: Karmic Mantra

Appreciate What You Have !

2013-02-03T19:00:00.000-08:00

Sharing a forwarded mail, a very good story, which really touched my heart. It tells you about basic human tendency of show-offs, cribbing for small things in life, not appreciating what we have & no time to thank God for blessings etc.:
One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.
On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"
"It was great, Dad."
"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.
"Oh yeah," said the son.
"So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.
The son answered:
"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.
We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.
We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.
Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.
We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.
We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.
We buy our food, but they grow theirs.
We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them."
The boy's father was speechless.
Then his son added, "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."
Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have.
Appreciate every single thing you have.
-

8 Foods You Should Never Eat Out of Season

2012-11-15T07:30:00.000-08:00

Share You ...

8 Foods You Should Never Eat Out of Season
by Amy Ahlberg

Tomatoes

DiMinno is adamant about eating fresh tomatoes when they're naturally ripe and delicious. "Eat them between early August and mid-to-late October, says DiMinno. "They can only gain their full potential sweetness and tenderness in the middle and late summer months." In the winter, bypass the cardboard-y orbs in the produce section and look for jarred, crushed tomatoes instead.

Read the complete list on health.yahoo.net

CHRISTMAS PARTY BEAUTY TIPS AND TRICKS

2012-11-15T07:00:00.000-08:00

Share You ...

The Christmas party season will be a breeze with these tips on hand.

By Emma Robertson

WHETHER your Christmas party is in a week, a day or less than an hour, here' s advice to guarantee you look great.

Read more here: Christmas Party Beauty Tips

Credited to : express.co.uk

23 DIY Natural Beauty Tips

2012-11-14T12:07:00.000-08:00

Share You ...
Think of your pantry as your new make-up case.
by Molly Horan

Make a strawberry mask to help acne prone skin

Strawberries are a natural source of Salicylic Acid, which you can find in most store bought acne cleansers. Learn how to make the mask here.

Read more here & credited to: buzzfeed.com

Best, Worst Breakfasts for Your Health

2012-11-14T11:40:00.000-08:00

Share You ...

By Lisa Collier Cool

Fast-food breakfast sandwiches could be “a time bomb in a bun”—and eating even one fat-laden morning meal has immediate adverse effects on your arteries, according to a new study presented at the Canadian Cardiovascular Congress meeting in Toronto... (Credited & thanks to www.health.yahoo.net)

Read more here on health.Yahoo.net

How to Analyse Your Relationship

2012-08-27T06:58:00.000-07:00

Being able to judge whether your feelings are REAL LOVE can be difficult, especially as a teenager.

Questions that you might ask of your relationship include:
RESPECT
- Does he or she listen when you speak?
Does he/she know the things that are most important to you and vice versa?

EQUALITY
- What do you do together as shared interests?
Do you share each other’s friends?

AFFECTION
- Are there any signs of affection or kindness apart from sexual activity?

LOYALTY
- Is he/she loyal to you regardless of what his/her friends think and do?

LIBERATION
- Do you have someone to turn to apart from your boyfriend/girlfriend?
What is the future of your education and other life goals if this relationship continues?

OPENESS
- Do you and your partner express negative feelings of guilt, anger, depression?
Do you and your partner freely express positive feelings of love and affection?

VIGOR
- Is the intensity of the relationship one sided?

ENRICHMENT
- Do you like the way you act whilst in this relationship?
Do you believe that you have matured in it?

There are many ways to show that you care:
making friends and enjoying life,
sharing fun in sport and other activities,
sharing feelings about what you want out of life and listening to the other person.
When you are open and honest with your partner
it’s amazing how many feelings you will both share and how close you can feel.
-
-

Story of Smile !

2012-08-21T23:49:00.003-07:00

A little girl walked to and from school daily. Though the weather that morning was questionable and clouds were forming, she made her daily trek to the elementary school.

As the afternoon progressed, the winds whipped up,along with thunder and lightning. The mother of the little girl felt concerned that her daughter would be frightened as she walked home from school and she herself feared that the electrical storm might harm her child.

Following the roar of thunder, lightning, like a flaming word, would cut through the sky.

Full of concern, the mother quickly got into her car and drove along the route to her child's school. As she did so, she saw her little girl walking along, but at each flash of lightning, the child would stop, look up and smile.

Another and another were to follow quickly and with each, the little girl would look at the streak of light and smile.

When the mother's car drove up beside the child, she lowered the window and called to her, "What are you doing?

Why do you keep stopping?" The child answered, "I am trying to look pretty,

God keeps taking my picture"

The Moral of the story is........

"Face the storms that come your way and don't forget to SMILE! "

Now Smile...... Pass it along to brighten someone else's day because I know you SMILED !!!

The Wisdom in Hot Chocolate

2012-08-21T22:28:00.002-07:00

A group of graduates, well established in their careers, were talking at a reunion and decided to go visit their old university professor, now retired.

During their visit, the conversation turned to complaints about stress in their work and lives. Offering his guests hot chocolate, the professor went into the kitchen and returned with a large pot of hot chocolate and an assortment of cups — porcelain, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite.

He then told them all to help themselves to the hot chocolate. When they each had a cup of hot chocolate in hand, the professor said:

"Notice that all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress."

"The cup that you're drinking from adds nothing to the quality of the hot chocolate. In most cases it is just more expensive and in some cases even hides what we drink."

"What all of you really wanted was hot chocolate, not the cup ... but you consciously went for the BEST cups." "And then you began eyeing each other's cups."

"Now consider this: Life is the hot chocolate; your job, money and position in society are the cups.

They are just tools to hold and contain life." "The cup you have does not define, nor change the quality of life you have.

Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the hot chocolate." The happiest people don't need the best of everything. They just make the best of everything that they have.

Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak kindly.

And enjoy your hot chocolate!!

How to Stop Worrying

2012-08-09T08:15:00.000-07:00

Worry does not empty tomorrow of sorrow – it empties today of strength.

Corrie ten Boom
You need to know how to stop worrying if you want to live life to the fullest. Why? Because
worry doesn’t do you any good. It won’t help you live a better life. It won’t make you feel better and more energized. Instead, it will make you less happy and less productive.

But how can we do that? How can we stop worrying? Here are eight ways:

1. Focus on what you can control
Thinking about things you can’t control puts unnecessary burden on your mind. For example, why should you worry about how bad the economy is? There’s nothing you can do about it unless you are a key person in the government. No matter how much you think about it, nothing will change. So instead of worrying about it, focus on things you can control like building your network and increasing your value. Don’t worry about things you can’t do anything about.

2. Use your imagination positively
Worry is a misuse of imagination.
Dan Zadra

Your imagination is a double-edged sword. You can use it to dream big dreams and keep your motivation high, but you can also use it to discourage yourself. People often worry about something because they fill their imagination with all the bad things that might happen. The reality is often not that bad, but it looks worse and worse because they give it too much attention.

3. Expect good things to happen
Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.
Benjamin Franklin

Not only should you use your imagination positively, but also you should expect good things to happen in your life. Instead of expecting something to fail, expect it to succeed. Instead of expecting people not to like you, expect them to like you. You should be realistic, of course, but always expect to be a winner in life.

4. Accept responsibility
You might make mistakes in the past and worry about the consequences. In this case, the solution is to accept responsibility. Don’t let your worry drag you down. Accept the responsibility and move on. You still have a lot of great things waiting for you.

5. Be grateful
It’s easy to focus on the few things that could go wrong that we forget about the many things that already go right. That’s why having an attitude of gratitude is important. It keeps your perspective in balance. It makes you realize that for one thing that goes wrong there are many more things that go right. Just start with these simple things to be grateful for.

6. Run your own race
Stop comparing yourself with other people. Comparing yourself with others will only drain your mental energy. You have your own race to run. Instead of comparing yourself with others, focus on being the best that you can be.

7. Simplify your life
The simpler your life is, the fewer things you could worry about. So instead of doing a lot of things, focus on the few things that are most fulfilling and give you the most return for your time and effort. Find your life purpose and use the 80/20 rule to choose the few important activities to focus on.

8. Have faith
You should focus on things you can control. But what about things you can’t control? What can we do to eliminate any worry about them? The answer here is faith. You need to believe that everything will go well no matter how bad it might seem. You need to believe that everything will come out better in the end. Having faith eliminates a lot of worries in your life. It gives you peace of mind.

-

Natural Ways to Increase your Energy Level

2012-07-29T08:55:00.000-07:00

Forget about the energy drinks or pills. Learn to increase your energy naturally, and have a healthy steady supply to get you through each day. By adjusting your personal eating, sleeping and exercise habits, you can boost your energy the natural way and settle into a self-sustaining rhythm.

Essential Water – Keep your body hydrated throughout the day. The first sign of dehydration is fatigue. Your body can’t function at capacity without that good old H2O. A steady supply of water will naturally keep things flowing–including your energy.

Improve Sleeping Habits – Often a small adjustment of your sleeping habits can already do wonders for your energy levels.

Lying in bed is not sleeping: Don’t go to bed if your not sleepy and end up lying in bed pondering and stressing. If you are drifting off at the computer, while reading, or watching TV, it’s time to get to bed. Your bedtime should and will vary from night to night. Let your body tell you when to sleep as opposed to the following the 8-hour rule.

Rise and Shine: Put an alarm and get up at the same time everyday.

Sleepy at Noon?: Try a powernap of 20 minutes in a quiet place.

Experiment and find out what your optimal sleep levels are.

Yoga, Exercising & Stretching – It sounds counter-intuitive, perhaps, but by expending energy on a regular basis, you will actually give yourself more of it in the end. The key is to set up a fairly regular schedule–about three times a week–and push to the point that you feel refreshed, not exhausted. Don’t overdo it. It may take a couple of weeks to get into the natural rhythm, so have patience and higher energy levels will follow.

Deep breathing exercise – Another great way to re-energize your body is with a quick deep breathing exercise. Sit on a chair with a straight back and breathe deeply while you focus on your breath going in – going out. At the same time use a powerful affirmation to invigorate your mind and body.

Eliminate Energy-Sappers From Your Diet – Have more alkaline-forming foods like fruits and vegetables. Avoid excess sugar and coffee as they lead to lower blood sugar levels–and less energy–after they give you an initial kick. Also one could pack some almonds and nuts for a quick and convenient protein snack.

Fruit-eaters Seem to be Protected Against Cancers

Ten Food Variations

Heal Your Headache Naturally

Top 5 Foods for Lowering Cholesterol

Benefits of Walking Exercise

Natural Foods that Keep Your Arteries Clean

Regular Health Mistakes

10 Things in Life You Control

2012-07-29T06:54:00.001-07:00

by Jim Allen

There are just a few aspects of life that we can truly control, and it's useful to know just what those areas are. If you don't know, you'll spend a lot of time blaming others for your own failings. Try and exert too much control in areas you shouldn't and the universe will create some interesting ways to remind of your place.

So be prepared and learn the 10 things in life that you DO control:
1. What you do.
Your actions are yours alone. You choose to make them or not make them and you are responsible for the effects of those actions.
2. What you say.
Likewise, the words you speak (or write) are also consciously chosen. Like actions, they have an impact on your life and the lives of those you contact.
3. What you think.
Yes, there are some subconscious thoughts that you can't control. But the things that you really think about, your beliefs, your ideals, etc. are concepts you have chosen to accept and believe in.
4. Your work.
Many people like to overlook this one, it being much easier to say "Oh, I'm trapped in my job because I don't have a degree, experience, etc." Hogwash! That's simple a way of denying one's responsibility in having chosen the job in the first place. It's your job and you chose it. If you stay (or go), that's a choice as well.
5. The people you associate with.
There's a famous t-shirt that states: "It's hard to soar like an eagle when you're surrounded by turkeys." Colloquial is very often correct! Your friends can either lift you up or bring you down. You make the decision which type of friends you wish to have.
6. Your basic physical health.
Much about our health is a factor of genetics, environment, and exposure. Much more of our health is simply a matter of the things we choose: diet, excercise, drugs, sleep, routine physicals, check-ups, etc.
7. The environment you live in.
Your house, the condition of your home, the town you live in, the amenities available to you are all things you can control, although some to a lesser degree (i.e., you decide to tolerate them or move someplace else).
8. Your fiscal situation.
Having or not having enough money is a factor of what you make versus what you spend.
9. Your time.
You choose how to "spend" your time and how much of your time to give to various activities. You'll never get more time than the 24 hours your given each day.
10. Your legacy.
All your actions, words, and knowledge that you share while you are living become the gift that you leave when you are gone.

May the spirit of Love be with you!
-
-

Love and Time

2012-07-23T07:22:00.000-07:00

( an old story )

Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived: Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge, and all of the others, including Love.
One day it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so all constructed boats and left. Except for Love.

Love was the only one who stayed. Love wanted to hold out until the last possible moment.
When the island had almost sunk, Love decided to ask for help. Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said,
"Richness, can you take me with you?" Richness answered, "No, I can't. There is a lot of gold and silver in my boat. There is no place here for you."

Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by in a beautiful vessel. "Vanity, please help me!" "I can't help you, Love.
You are all wet and might damage my boat," Vanity answered.
Sadness was close by so Love asked, "Sadness, let me go with you." "Oh . . . Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!"

Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so happy that she did not even hear when Love called her. Suddenly, there was a voice, "Come, Love, I will take you." It was an elder.
So blessed and overjoyed, Love even forgot to ask the elder where they were going.
When they arrived at dry land, the elder went her own way.
Realizing how much was owed the elder, Love asked Knowledge, another elder, "Who Helped me?" "It was Time," Knowledge answered. "Time?" asked Love. "But why did Time help me?"

Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and answered, "Because only Time is capable of understanding how valuable Love is."
-
-