CATHY HUANG

Tulum Beach Jungle Gym

2020-03-09T17:33:00.001-07:00

Azulik Tulum, Kitchen Table Restaurant & Beaches

2020-03-09T17:32:00.003-07:00

Tulum Beach Zone: Raw Love Bar, Ahau

2020-03-09T17:30:00.001-07:00

Tulum Archaeological Ruins

2020-03-09T17:27:00.001-07:00

Anima Garden, Marrakech | André Heller

2018-12-18T19:21:00.002-08:00

Jardin Majorelle, YSL Museum, La Mamounia, Marrakech Morocco

2018-12-18T19:16:00.002-08:00

Bahia Palace & Old City Marrakech, Morocco

2018-12-18T19:01:00.001-08:00

First Impressions:

-red, red and more brick red

- I'm suffocating with the air quality

- everything is colorful

- Marrakech is the place to be

Fez, Morocco City View

2018-12-18T18:54:00.001-08:00

Old Medina of Fez and Tannery, Morocco

2018-12-18T18:51:00.000-08:00

First Impressions

- old Jerusalem vibes

-holy crap the tannery smells horrific

-how do people work there?

-bless my job now

-wow at all this gold

-this could be a movie set

Virtual Reality & Augmented Reality: An Empath Tool

2018-09-25T22:53:00.002-07:00

The first time I experienced VR was through a free 10 minute demo at a store, I played a game and flew around in Google Maps up and down tall New York skyscrapers. Tonight, after hearing a talk from the creative director of Microsoft and two start up companies I really understand the meaning of VR and how technology will shape our lives in the future. I understand VR & AR as not a source of entertainment but as a tool that helped evoke empathy. The examples given included the possible scenarios:

experiencing what it felt like to be a transgendered teen in a rural town
experiencing the effects of bullying as if you were the victim
being virtually transported to an garbage island to see the extent of environmental damage
allowing patients to understand their diagnosis by having an 4D view

Those points stood out to me not from a point of practically, but from an emotional perspective because alot of these experiences would be extremely costly or physically impossible to stimulate in real life without consequences. There's been alot of talk about how technology is taking over the world, but I think it would be used towards a good cause in the future. And I don't think our society will ever stop progressing. Yes, VR and AR can replace repetitive manual jobs in the future but at the same time, can offer many solutions to topics such as empathy. And as the speakers said, just describing VR is difficult, to show someone the true value of the program, they have to fully immerse themselves in it. This was a great point, like "walking in someone's shoes" quite literally.

And perhaps that would be the future for events and TED talks. To give guests or decision makers the opportunity to experience "the day in the life" of an minority, or an place of concern. This talk was truly inspirational.

One Day At A Time, According to Claire Wineland

2018-09-05T22:48:00.000-07:00

"Well I'm dying..." *sips coffee* "faster than everyone else, that is". Those are the first words I heard from this girl a few years ago when I came across her Youtube video. Than I found out she passed away this week. I followed her journey with cystic fibrosis here and there, listening to her TED Talks and following her all the way to her final moments on Instagram. The impact of her words have inspired me as much as a Dalai Lama book, because to me they were such simple truths about life. It embodied everything I read about but failed to put into practice all these years. In the perspective of happiness, Claire said that happiness is purely an release of dopamine, a chemical process. And that life is is more often than not, extremely mundane and routine. One of my favorite concepts she talks about is this concept of viewing problems as neutral. That there is no "fairness god" in this world giving out easy rides to anyone. And I remembered one of her TED talks:

"There's this awesome saying that I love that you will never truly get what you want until you want what you have. And, you know, at first, I didn't really like that saying because I'm like, "wait -- no, no, no -- I don't want what I have -- you know you want to have more! Right? You don't like want what you have. That's like messed up. But when you start thinking about it, when you ... no matter what you have, you're always going to be wanting to have something more. It's kind of human nature."

About wanting more than this. Wanting more than this job, this car, this house, this problem, that problem, this illness. And what I've been trying to tell myself and people for years is there is no final destination. There's only one day at a time. There is no elusive level of life that puts you in an automatic state of bliss, no matter what. And to me, she really helped clarify the "no matter what" part. That in this very moment, nothing bad is actually happening. And that should be enough, because if our minds kept hurrying to the next day, next month, next year, before we know it we are at the end of life wondering why we are still unsatisfied.

"Right in this moment, we are here together. Right this second it's great."

So instead of asking, what ELSE should I have that I don't? Where else can I struggle harder to achieve that I haven't got to yet? The question is, this is what I have and what can I do with it?

5 Life Lessons I Learned In My 20s

2018-06-28T22:45:00.000-07:00

1. "Sometimes love is not enough, and the road gets tough I don't know why": This line of Lana Del Rey lyrics have carried me through for the past few years, what a realization this is In my personal life and experiences of those around me, I understand now that love is much more beyond our control than we think. We have bad days, we grow differently, bad decisions get made, trust is broken. That doesn't mean love disappears. Love is there, but that is not enough to keep it together.

2. Fairness is Not Guranteed: I'm going to quote my favorite terminally ill Youtuber, Claire Wineland in her end stages of Cystic Fibrosis (is it weird that she is one of my thought idols?)

“I think it’s important to say that just because something’s supposed to be what you’re doing, doesn’t mean it’s going to feel good. It doesn’t mean that it’s going to be easy. It doesn’t mean that it’s going to feel like fucking rainbows and butterflies. It doesn’t mean that it’s going to feel decent. Like it might actually be the most painful thing you could possibly do.
And I think that’s where everyone gets it wrong. I think we are kind of raised to believe that the best thing to do is the easiest thing to do. Or that the best thing to do is the thing that’s going to make you happiest. And I think it’s actually backwards. I think a lot of times the best thing to do in life is the thing that’s going to make you miserable. Or is the thing that hurts and is difficult, and is hard to do, because it actually DEMANDS something of you. Right? Like being happy in a certain sense, is such a flaccid emotion. It’s so passing and fleeting and weak, you know what I mean? It comes at the most random times, sometimes because of nothing, and it’s just dopamine in your system you know?
But fundamentally, like giving something of yourself and showing up for life, that actually takes a lot out of you. And anything that takes a lot out of you.
“None of this is easy. Getting things threaded in my wrist while I’m like starving and like half asleep and have a migraine and nearly like passing out on an operating table is not easy. But that also doesn’t mean that it’s the bad decision. It also doesn’t mean that it’s the wrong decision. I think that a lot of times, the things that are worth doing in life are gonna require a lot of pain and a lot of suffering. And I think that’s what makes them worth doing. You know? Like nothing that’s lasting and nothing that’s real is easy."

And this got me thinking about my own attitude towards life. In my 20s I always hoped for the easy way out. Just date someone nice and get that man to support me (I thought like this when I was 20). What else could go wrong right? Just leave the country for a bit, maybe forever and start fresh. Than right now, as I'm typing this after 14 hours of straight work a little voice in my head is screaming "everyone shut up!! Do you know how I feel?? I'm dying inside!!"

Taking a breathe feels weird because there are so many things I have to do. I feel like a iPhone running on 5% charge when the screen starts dimming. But underneath all this, I realize how much I've accomplished so far. This week alone I've went through my first official networking event and I now that 5 industry leads. I'm basically completing 80% of an report all alone, when the work was supposed to be split between 4 people. I've moved out, distanced myself from my narcissistic mother, and continued my 14 hour days for the past 5 months, on top of this I paid my entire tuition. Nothing I've done this year is easy or convenient. And when I look back at every notable moment, those were the ones that materialized after hours or months of frustration. So yes, life is unfair and what I'm beginning to realize is that it is perfectly normal to struggle and that life is HARD.

3. Success is Not Linear: Success if not linear because we are not given equal opportunities since birth. And everyone grows up in a different environment. More often than not, people do not have their finances or career goals set all the way into their 30s. I always envisioned a straight timeline when I was younger, but now from speaking to people my age and double my age, this is not the case.

4. Nothing is Bad as Expected: As a hypochondriac and anxiety driven person, I always imagine the worst possible outcome. Like I could envision myself frozen in fear, getting lost, failing, being reprimanded for hours on end. Actually I learned that just going into anything and being in the moment, nothing is ever as bad as the "what if". I showed up, I tried my best, I'm reaching out, I'm just going for it. Nothing more, nothing less.

5. If You say Nothing, the answer is always NO: If I don't stand up for myself, no matter the issue, the other party will always assume I'm fine with it. If I don't ask, the answer is 100% no. That goes hand in hand with giving my best, because what else is there to do beyond that? And as for rejection, somehow this doesn't impact my self image as much as before. I know what I'm worth, what I stand for, what I have to offer. If I put this is marketing terms, I know my own unique value preposition. No is still not nice to hear, but its easier once you know what you want, and what you stand for.

Reality & Parallel Universe

2018-05-17T00:13:00.002-07:00

Lately I've been thinking about about how I relationship with everyone in my life is like train tracks. At certain times we pass each other, or even go down the same direction. Sometimes we split shortly after into opposite directions, sometimes we go in the same direction together for a long time.

And sometimes, we go in the opposite direction, only to find our way back to each other again. I could feel the immense importance of seemingly insignificant events or conversations. Those shift our directions without us knowing. I love the idea that with any given situation, there are infinite outcomes, but yet somehow we are living in the outcome that is currently existing. And I love to imagine the fact that, there are probably infinite copies of me in slight variations existing in other universes. Sometimes I wonder how parallel universe me is doing. Where do I live, who am I dating, what do I like to do? Or am I doing much worse than now?

I was listening to a podcast today, and it talked about what we are certain of at any given point. For example, I know the pillow I am laying on is real. But how do I know that? What do I really know about anything? The podcast says the only thing we are sure of is our consiousness and existence in the present moment. Therefore, if I don't even know if the pillow I'm laying on is real, how on earth can I expect anything to be concrete? When I was younger, I would plan what my life would be like at 25, 30 etc. But I remind myself now that, RELAX! Everythings out of control! My train could easily take a opposite direction again with another, but does that mean journey is over? No, I'm heading some place new.

Sometimes I think about why everything is rooted in fear. Job security, losing money, losing status, losing boyfriend. Than when we are not worried about losing, we are worried about gaining them. Why do we have a scarcity mindset and not an abundant mindset? But honestly, if we look at our lives, we can see how many times our train has changed direction already. Maybe there is no right track. Maybe we can be free of fear & accept whichever direction life takes, because at any given point of life, who knows where we are headed!

The Secret to Love is Just Kindness

2018-03-17T23:57:00.002-07:00

Last week I read a very insightful article from The Atlantic called Masters of Love. Scientists followed couples progress and marriage that spanned over decades to determine the cause of a long-lasting relationship or marriage. Couples were categorized into "masters" and "disasters". The concept was that every time one's partner had a need or request for a connection, they would make a "bid". For example, your partner had a long day at work and told you that they were considering quitting their job. "Disaster" couples would not support each other and respond properly, while "Masters" would take the time out of their day to ask questions specific to their problems and provide empathy.

What shocked me after reading this article, was the simplicity of everything. Just responding kindly to something as small as "look at that flower outside, do you like the color?" could have an lasting impact in the grand scheme of a relationship. It made me think of a quote from The 5 Love Languages "Love is nothing something you do for yourself, it's something you do for others." That reminded me of myself, often times I get lost in my own world of problems. School, work, health, drama. Lots and lots of drama that spin round and round. I need to tell the world, listen to me, listen to my problems, offer me a solution, I'm suffering for god's sake! Than I become unkind and intolerant. And the biggest person I take my frustration out on is often my significant other.

But the older I get, the more I realize that however huge my problems and needs may seem, the world ultimately does not evolve around me. And it's in those very moments of frustrations, when you ignore your partner's "bid" that things start going downhill. I am realizing that kindness and generosity may be the solution to all problems. Being kind when things go well, when we are happy and positive is easy as ever. But it is in those bad moments that kindness may matter the most. Because in the end, it doesn't matter how many places, things, or even an extravagant marriage ceremony with a cartier ring. Things sit on a shelf, vacations fade, memories become vague. But we can also choose to be kind in every "bid" our partners make towards us.

And most importantly, just realizing the human element of your partner. To not show contempt and hostility towards them, in every small moment. To be generous when you don't feel like it, when you just feel like being mean. We need to validate them and their experience, offer support when needed, and always be polite. I believe that complacency kills everything. Many people think "I've been married for X amount of years, he's annoying me again, I'm going to scream". To be honest, love to me is when I want to do ______ and I will do ______ instead because my partner wants or needs me to. They are not there to buy you things, offer you unwavering support, and take verbal abuse. I wish people would realize how damaging this type of behaviour and thinking is in the long run.

Your partner is a human being who also suffers, who has the same feelings of anxiety and fears you wake up to everyday. Who experiences sporadic moments of happiness and also self contempt. There's always reasons behind everything someone does. I hope to practice kindness and generosity more in my life.

Los Angeles 2018: Santa Monica Pier

2018-02-03T15:31:00.001-08:00

Los Angeles 2018: Malibu Wine Safari & Spire 73

2018-02-03T15:29:00.001-08:00

Los Angeles 2018: Malibu & Paradise Cove Cafe

2018-02-03T15:25:00.001-08:00

Los Angeles 2018: LACMA & Urban Lights

2018-02-03T15:23:00.001-08:00

Los Angeles 2018: MOCA & Downtown LA

2018-02-03T15:20:00.003-08:00

Busan, Korea 2017: Haeundae Beach & Nampo District

2017-11-12T21:00:00.003-08:00

We went to Busan for 2 days via a 8 hour roundtrip car ride. God bless my friend's stepmom for driving us!! Korea was a different experience this time because I was with locals and a Korean family for the whole time. I didn't ride the subway or bus because we were driven everywhere. I ate home cooked food half the time and it was great seeing how locals lived compared to when I lived there and being surrounded by other foreigners. Busan is hands down my favorite city. This is the place where everything started, the air is fresh, the beach is nice, the people are more chill, the food is good. This was the first city I seen when I lived here, and it made me think of all the friends I made here and walking down the streets, shopping, and taking pictures with them 2 years ago. We stayed in the center of the shopping district and it was insanely convenient because restaurants and shops were right below the hotel. Ofcourse, Haeundae beach looked as good as ever. The weather was glorious and life was good.

Korea, Seoul 2017: Myeongdong & STYLENANDA Pink Hotel

2017-11-12T20:45:00.001-08:00

Myeongdong was another place I never got to visit, therefore I went here to do a wild amount of shopping and see my 3CE idol, Park Sora's flagship store. Finding STYLENANDA Pink Hotel took quite a bit of walking and it was a little hidden, but everything was worth it. The aesthetics were amazing and I am in love with the roof top "Pink Pool" cafe. Sadly, there wasnt much time to order a drink and lounge around. I definitely would say this is one of the best concept stores I have ever seen. STYLENANDA gives me lots of inspirations when it comes to makeup and fashion! I also met my best friend's Pomeranian, it was one of the reasons that made this trip so worth it!

Seoul, Korea 2017: Namsan Tower and Love Locks

2017-11-12T20:37:00.004-08:00

One of my checklists coming back here was to visit Seoul more, since I only visited it a handful of times while I lived in Korea. I didn't come up much since I lived near Daegu, and it took hours roundtrip to Seoul. The weather in Korea was surprising warmer than I remembered, it was almost T-shirt season in November?? We came up to the tower via cable car, than got tickets to go up on the observatory deck. I swear I have a thing with observatory decks, I love seeing the city from above. It was nothing compared to the tallest building in the world, but the interior was cute and there was even a "Hello Kitty Island" shop. I got some souvenirs and unfortunately did not buy a love lock to tie up because I am as single as a dollar bill at the moment. It was a great experience and the autumn colors really added to the whole vibe.

Shanghai, China 2017: The Bund, Downtown, Shanghai Tower, Pearl Tower

2017-11-12T20:24:00.000-08:00

I had a few hours to see Shanghai on my way to Korea, and was very pleasantly surprised at the amount of infrastructure and advancement that China has seen over the past few years. This skyline rivals Dubai downtown, and that's saying alot because up from the Burj Khalifa, the downtown night scene was incomparable. Even though I didn't go on the 118th deck of Shanghai Tower, the night view and buildings is comparable to none other I seen aside from Dubai. I got to see the Huangpu river and the backdrop as well. Overall, a very nice observatory tower even though its not the tallest. It has the most character!

The Dream of Life (Alan Watts)

2017-08-30T23:36:00.000-07:00

The dream of a life. I've heard this excerpt over and over again. Struggling to understand the meaning. But than one morning I was listening to this with intent, and it struck me with great clarity. This spoke to me in the sense that the perfect dream or lifespan really doesn't exist. Because whatever dreams are reached, there is a internal dissatisfaction with it deep within. He speaks of being more adventorous with dreams, and instead of 100% control letting go to let the unexpected happen. And that makes up a life. Suddenly I felt like this was the exact life, I myself chose to live. The flaws, the discolorations that make up each day, the mind numbing moments, and all the static moments I slowed down to really think about it all. Maybe these are meant to come hand in hand with total gratification, and those ever so brief moments of pure contentment.

The idea that even if one could choose their ideal life, but end up choosing the one they live now struck me as both perfectly conceivable but also unimaginable. What if one's entire life was in fact a dream, and even with all the moments of suffering and loss, was something they willing choose to experience? There are so many questions. What I took away from this was to let things run their course, that there is no running from anything at all, because it will end anyways. The dream will fade out eventually. This small space of time was just a blink of the eye. Because what occasionally hits me, is that even my consciousness will not last forever. And everything is so fragile. Humans are, after all the only creatures that are born with the consciousness knowing of their eventual fate and live out their entire lives seeking purpose and meaning. But really, is this life just a fragment of an infinite possibility of dreams? To comprehend the sheer insignificance was this present life is an uncomfortable thought, but at the same time very necessary.

Contentness with Whatever

2017-07-16T22:14:00.003-07:00

Lately I been thinking about the ebb and flow of everything, and came to the conclusion that whatever works for me. I'm ok with never finding the person of my dreams, that maybe at the end of it all there is nobody. There is nobody I can look in the eyes and feel that forever. Or maybe it could be completely different. Again, this is out of my control. In fact everything was out of control to begin with. In fact, free will was probably an illusion after all. I'm ok with never getting my foot in the door for a perfect opportunity to come out of the sky. I may never look at a given situation and think I'm 100% satisfied with it. Hell, I'm fine with never being 100% on any day of my life. I'm fine with any misfortunes coming my way, I'm fine with anyone who leaves because I know someone else is coming along. I truly believe that's the way life was and every unsatisfaction comes from our perceived expectation of reality never matching with reality as it is.

And honestly, is there any a timeline or deadline to do anything? To go date someone or travel anywhere by? To get everything settled by? I feel that I've lived like the timetables on a course schedule, rushing from place to place. Trying to "get there" in time and playing this catch up game with everyone else. When I was younger, the idea of not catching up was simply terrifying. When I'm I going to get that official "first date?" When am I going to graduate university? When will I get to travel to my dream destination? And I truly realize the futility of those anxious years because somehow, everything worked out as planned anyway. My biggest fear now is not that life won't work out, it is that life will eventually work out anyways but I'm still living in panic mode. Slowly, I'm growing accustomed to the reality of never having the exact people, events, and things the way I want. And that it is truly fine. It's the thoughts all along that were not. I'm fine with being mediocre instead trying to self actualize everyday like life is a long task list.

It's really a whatever to me now. Everything will find a way. And my biggest regret so far and looking back at all those years I sat down in panic, panicking and fretting over something that would eventually materialize anyways. Sitting down in fear imagining a cloud of nothingness ahead. Not accepting there was nothing I could do about it anyways. And what I've learned so far from this year is, everything gets old fast and if I was to depend on outside circumstances for fulfillment, I would revert back to panic mode again. I guess, sitting down with "not knowing" is really what should be done. And with a little Eckhart Tolle twist, everything fades eventually either way. So what am I resisting against?