An Apple a Day

Vote 2013

2013-05-13T09:35:00.000+08:00

When I was a kid my Dad stressed out that we had to vote. I became a registered voter when I was just 15 years old so I could participate in the Sangguniang Kabataan elections. I wasn't able to vote though in the 1992 elections because I was still underage. Even so my Dad encouraged me to be a participative citizen. Before I became a full-fledged voter I had already experienced being a PPCRV volunteer and a pollwatcher.

In the last few years though my health hasn't allowed me to volunteer to help out with the elections so I had to find new ways of being participative. In 2010, me and Google-engineer friend, Dan Delima, came up with the app Find Your Precinct. I thought that the clustering of 280,000 precincts to just 80,000 was going to create confusion among voters. And this held true as I saw a lot of disgruntled voters in 2010 who didn't know that their precinct location changed.

I pushed to get out of medical leave so I could help run the project again and I'm really happy that we had 30 precinct mapUps across the country in the last 3 weeks. This also allowed citizens to participate in the elections and potentially help millions of voters who need help to locate their precincts. [To all those who volunteered thank you for the bottom of my newly repaired heart!] Google Philippines also came out with an elections page which helped me check the list of candidates in the national and local elections (I didn't like the thought of scouting for flyers or going to the barangay hall to check the list).

My precinct a day before.

It's still early, please go out and vote! If you aren't registered then maybe you can help map more precincts by going to http://www.findyourprecinct.ph!

[BTW, thank you to the DepEd teachers, our community doctor (Dr. Guzman), and neighbors for assisting me so I didn't have to line up to vote. The heat was really awful and could've spelled disaster for me.]

Precinct Mapping

2013-05-02T16:13:00.001+08:00

Getting people to map has been my passion in the last few years and I'm glad I found a buddy who can translate my idea into something useful for a lot of people. Couple that with a company and friends and community who supports crazy ideas equals a useful app for voters and those who want to volunteer.

I really pushed hard to get back to work in order to run this project again for this year's election and I was deliriously happy when it was featured on Jessica Soho's State of the Nation and ANC Alerts.

Weee! Thanks a heap Dan, Gail, Ryan, Vince, Reymart, Juned, Chelle, Allan, Vanj, JR, Theo, Bernie, Yen, Anne, Richard, Noel, Avel, Doc Remo, Andrew, Clint, Ryann, Ruben, Bino, AJ, Fatz, Yunel and the many, many people who contributed to make this project successful (hope I didn't forget anyone!).

*This post was blogged on a Chromebook! (A borrowed one hehe).

Third Life: the GenSan and Lake Sebu Adventure

2013-04-30T10:51:00.000+08:00

I finally went home exactly a month ago and promptly lost any free time to blog. It's amazing though how being closer to family and friends contribute to faster recovery. When I went home a month ago I was huffing and puffing all over the place (getting off the plane and walking to the baggage area was like running a marathon for me) and the heat was just terrible. Eventually though with a lot of encouragement from Sweetie, Mom and Miguel, I slowly adjusted back to my regular routine -- work and domestic chores.

Getting up and down a flight of stairs was a huge achievement for me. I had to re-learn quickly since I went to GenSan on the third week of April and local airports usually don't have passenger tubes to walk on. I was just really happy to see my friends and the communities I work with. They took care of me really well (thanks Avel and Chelle!) and it was a relief to have Doc Remo around all the time (in case of emergency!).

Aside from visiting GenSan for some events we also went to Lake Sebu to visit the school Nanardzx chose as his beneficiary when he won the GDG Map Your Town competition last year. Lake Sebu Central Elementary School is located high up in the mountains in Lake Sebu, about 2 hours away from GenSan. The people were so warm and lovely (thank you Mrs. Manalac!) and I just wish we can do more to help.

It's always been my dream to try on the T'boli traditional attire (this is because my best friend stayed there for about a month when we were teenagers) and so I did! They fixed me up like a princess! (I loved the outfit so much I bought it hehe).

My doctor said during my check up last weekend that my heart is finally clear of unnecessary fluids, but I need to work on my stamina. So I'm doing well but need to listen to my body. I still feel the some odd pain at times (especially when it's hot) but I'm happy I don't need to drink any painkiller or maintenance medicine. My concentration has been a lot better and I think my family and team is benefiting from this (I hope!). Hopefully by end of May my stamina will be back so I could travel on my own and visit my many friends across Southeast Asia!

(Oh, do notice that G+ commenting has been enabled on my blog!).

Grounded No More

2013-03-27T20:18:00.001+08:00

My Mom left this note for Sweetie when she left for Manila last January after my surgery. My eyes welled up when I read the note since my Mom is quite reserved, so this note spoke volumes.

I just came back from a check-up. Both my cardio and surgeon have finally allowed me to go home to Manila (yay!) but cautioned I shouldn't go back yet to my rigorous travel schedule. My surgeon declared that the ordeal is finally over after seeing that there was no more water in my heart sac. Both my doctors said they were really worried about me and were both very happy about my recovery.

Dr. Shankar, my surgeon said that I'm where I am now because sheer willpower, my positive disposition and my beautiful family. I said that it was the only way to go and I'm lucky to have such a loving and caring family.

The secret sauce though is faith. The best decision I made in my life was to turn over the navigation and purpose to God. When I did that my life got so much better and any challenges did not seem so overwhelming. Aside from love my faith was the only thing I held on to during my surgery. I told myself that I would survive it if it was God's Will and if I didn't then I thought my mission has been completed and it was time to be reunited with my Dad.

I did survive, so I'm now praying for my new mission. It hasn't come to me yet probably because I should focus on fully recovering first. It will come in good time.

A blessed Holy Week to everyone!

A Review

2013-03-25T16:33:00.002+08:00

I stopped listing down resolutions at the beginning of the year. The last one I made was in 2011 and I even made a disclaimer that it's not just for the year, but for a decade. I'm happy to say that I've completed about half of it. Most of the things I've completed are the big ticket items:

- do something about my leaky heart (check!)
- buy a car (Minnie! check!)
- do the writing project (started!)
- travel (too much last year! check!)
- time with family (last year was bad, so started rectifying things this year)
- work on investments (moved into new home! check!)
- work on service (finished Parish website! choir duties every time I'm home. check!)
- cooking (not much last year, diet has changed this year)

2 things I'm not able to complete:
- grow an organic garden (all the plants died, I have a brown thumb, cry)
- work on crafts (I've lost interest and gave all my stuff to my Mom)

With my leaky heart behind me I've been thinking about what to do in the next few years. I'm still trying to figure it out and hopefully I'd be able to come out with a plan in the next few weeks.

Things I'm Going to Do When I'm Back Home

2013-03-21T09:30:00.000+08:00

If you follow me on my G+, Twitter or Plurk you'd know I can't wait to go home. I've been grounded for a few months now in Singapore because my doctor wants to make sure I'm okay before I leave. My doctor did say though that I could probably go home by April! Hooray!

I think I look much better now and my colleagues can attest that I don't look greenish anymore. Some have said I don't look like I went through heart surgery. I still hug a pillow though when I walk around so that's my dead giveaway. In any case I realized after spending two half-days at the office this week that I still need to take it slowly and conscientiously do my exercises (like malling!).

Here's my progress in the last 10 weeks.

There's a lot to do when I'm back home so I thought I'd make a list:

(1) Do groceries so I can cook (with assistance from Miguel who now knows how to cook adobo).

(2) Buy a couch. We have a long way to go before we complete the furniture needed at home. One missing item is a couch. I need a couch because I'm a full time couch potato!

(3) Visit the nail salon. I can't reach my toes yet. I need to get rid of my monster toe nails.

(4) Visit the salon. The weeks spent in the hospital has damaged my hair and I badly need a trim. Mom says my hair has reached mermaid length.

(5) Thank God by hearing mass on Easter at our church.

Of course I can't wait to see the rest of my family and friends ;)

Why I Continue to Blog

2013-03-20T16:27:00.003+08:00

I was half-asleep early this morning when I felt Miguel checking on me. I sleepily asked, "Why?" and he said that I was too quiet (probably because I wasn't snoring). He then promptly went back to sleep when he saw I was okay.

These are moments I want to remember and that's why I blog and continue to blog. And my primary reason for blogging is to document things/events that are important to me. Sometimes I re-read old posts just to see what I've been doing years ago. Sometimes I come across old posts from search results and I laugh at myself for forgetting I had the information all along.

I have been managing a number of blogs. I have one for travel, tips for planning a wedding, a marriage blog and a smattering of tiny blogs that cater to my other interests. I don't really remember how my blogs multiplied, but I see it as a repository of information I think I'd find useful in the future. My travel blog covers the places I've been to and I write mostly about food. I have a lot of photos from different hotels I've stayed at but I haven't gotten around to posting about them.

I've been exchanging some blogging tips with friends on Twitter the past few days and they were asking me how I've managed to continue writing despite being busy. I haven't been really conscientious about blogging since I write only when I feel like it. I never run out of content though since I keep a journal through photos and by writing down on my planner significant things that have happened. I usually just go back to check photos and my planner to see if there's anything I could write about.

So, I basically blog to entertain myself and I keep it as a repository of information I may need in the future. And well I guess my grandkids and great-grandkids can get to know the younger me when I'm old and gray.

The Proposal: Four Years After

2013-03-14T18:03:00.000+08:00

Four years ago today Sweetie sprung the biggest surprise of my life. We were in Davao for the first DFAT (Davao Food Appreciation Tour) and I had no idea that he had planned the culmination of all the clues he's been giving for me for so many months. His co-conspirators were our good friends Andrew and Blogie. Here's what happened:

(Skip to 4:22)

Time flies so fast and Sweetie and I have since tied the knot, bought our own cars, moved homes thrice, got our very own place (no more renting!) and have a son in university. Sweetie has endured a number of home disasters - my cooking, a dancing washing machine, me getting poisoned several times, cycle of dying plants, abusive real estate agents etc. - all captured in our marriage blog. We can't say that things have settled down because there's always something new everyday.

True to his promise Sweetie continues to court me every single day. When I'm home in Manila he writes me short notes everyday (to replace all his love letters which perished during Typhoon Ondoy). And after all that we've been through I just thank God everyday for writing my love story.

90 mapUps in the Philippines in 2012

2013-03-13T09:30:00.000+08:00

Filipino mappers are the most active in the world (that's my opinion) since we had over 90 mapUps across the country.

I'm just so proud of them ;)

Malling is My Official Sport

2013-03-11T17:13:00.002+08:00

I remember when I first met my cardiologist ten years ago he asked me what sport I played regularly. I said, "Malling." with a big smile. I thought it was usual for him to get that reply because he went on to say that it was good I had a regular sport. He then paused when he saw me smiling and said, "Did you say malling?" I replied in the affirmative and then he laughed out loud. He said that he thought that I went bowling regularly. He declared I was his funniest patient but I said that was really my favorite "sport".

I hated PE classes. I always tried to get out of it from elementary to high school to college. Sometimes I'd feign sickness just to skip school. I do remember though being one of the fastest runners when I was in first grade, but for some strange reason my time eventually slowed. I guess my condition was already making itself felt when I was still a kid.

I did try out some sports. I love swimming. My Mom usually had a hard time pulling me away from the water when I was very little and I didn't care if I got sunburnt. I spent a lot of time biking with my yellow BMX bicycle. My brother taught me how to play tennis when I was a teenager. And I took up badminton when I had to drastically lose weight to fit in my gown for my friend's wedding. My badminton trainor though gave up on me because he couldn't make me run.

Unlike my Dad and my brother who either played tennis or basketball regularly I've always preferred to stay indoors. I guess it's because I just hate perspiring (haha). When I was discharged from the hospital the physiotherapist told me to make sure I did the exercises they taught me and to keep walking. The exercise was pretty easy so I did it, also to prevent my feet from swelling and I knew it was the only way to regain my independence. The first few weeks though were very hard.

I have rediscovered my favorite sport in the last few days, albeit in very limited capacity. My Mom was so bored taking care of me and I just had to bring her around. I brought her to IKEA one day, treated her to lunch at Marche after my check-up the next day, accompanied her to Daiso and brought her to the airport. The times I was out was quite limited and I made sure to rest whenever I felt tired, but going out has proven to be helpful in my recovery because I was forced to walk more.

I'm still very wary of crowds because I'm scared I might catch a cold or a virus. I didn't want Jay to be stuck at home tending to me when he visited last week so I made it a point to eat lunch out as my exercise for the day. The doctor told me to do what I think was my body was comfortable with so I naturally went back to my official sport, malling. It's been quite helpful for my recovery although a bit expensive since I still need to take cabs, but at least I can happily report that I've reached the spirometer level my doctor wanted me to reach in the last 2 months.

Hopefully I'd be able to go home in a few weeks and work from Manila so I can go for my second favorite sport - swimming.

I Will Make You Hungry with this Post

2013-03-07T16:53:00.000+08:00

Warning: this is an epic post about food, gathered from years of travel and eating.

My doctor was very happy yesterday to see my progress. He said that he and my cardiologist were very worried about me, but seeing me walking and smiling again have relieved them. After doing a quick 2D echogram with his handy gadget he said that my lungs are clear and I just have 1 millimeter of water in my pericardium which should go away in time.

I've actually been feeling much better in the last week. I just stayed home for five days straight to rest and started venturing out for walks in the last 3 days. I think it's really helped regain some of my strength and I was really surprised that results from my spirometer exercises have increased to 1,250 ml (yay!). I can also raise my arms straight up now and wear a tshirt without wincing in pain (wearing though is a different ballgame from taking it off).

Anyway so since I've been stuck at home and been ordered to take my mind off work (and keep away!) I've just been watching TV, reading, blogging, updating my journal and dreaming about my favorite food.

My doctor said it'll be safe for me to travel in about a month. Ahh, aside from seeing family and friends back home I look forward to finally eating food I like. Here's my itinerary:

Vigan

Longganisa

Empanada

Manila

Spaghetti from Makati Supermart Coffeeshop in Alabang

Cheeseburger from Dayrit's

Jollibee, of course

And my first glass of cherry beer at Shift Restobar in Guijo, Makati

Pad Thai at Krung Thai in Marikina

Baguio

Strawberry Shortcake from Cafe by the Ruins (and loads of strawberries)

Buffalo Wings from Don Henrico's (it has to be in Baguio because I can eat the chicken there)

Bicol

Pasta Pinangat in Albay

Chiffon Cake and Pambonete from Casa Moderna

My Tita Olive's cooking

Cebu

A feast at AA Barbecue with my AA buddies Jerome, Andrew, Sweetie and hopefully with the girls, Chelle, Anne, Celine, Mitch and Jomar (no Jomar isn't a girl haha)

Boneless Crispy Pata from Dessert Factory

Bacolod

Bottomless cakes from Calea

Eating mangoes at Carbin Reef

Iloilo

Tuna Taco at Bauhinia (I hope it's still open!)

Davao

Pork Marinara, Unforgettable Pork Ribs and yummy cakes at Lachi's

Cagayan de Oro/Bukidnon

Cakes and pizza margherita at Candy's

A feast at Panagatan

Steak at Del Monte Golf Club

General Santos/Saranggani

A feast at Saranggani Highlands with my friends

Tuna kilawin and grilled tuna at Ranchero Grill

Making this post has seriously made me hungry.

Humpty Dumpty

2013-03-04T12:02:00.000+08:00

A few weeks back I felt like Humpty Dumpty. I felt my body was broken and seriously needed to be put back together again. I had to walk around clutching a pillow to support my chest because if I didn't I felt my heart might just disengage. Of course I exaggerate, I'm pretty sure my doctor made sure my heart wouldn't just fall off. It just needed to heal together with my broken sternum.

I'm happy to report that from 8 to 6 to 4 tablets of painkillers per day I've been making do with just one now. My doctor (and Sweetie) was pretty concerned that I might get addicted to it already. Well, I forgot to drink the painkiller last Saturday evening and decided I was ready to just drink it whenever I felt pain. It's Monday today and I've just been drinking one painkiller per day now.

I've also been feeling like the old me. In the last few years I've had to live more simply. For those who've just met me in the last 6 years you'd probably think I never wear high heeled shoes or wear make-up. Ten years ago in my former job I used to come to work in stilettos, fully made up and I was very much like Elle Woods. Kikay. I had a gazillion accessories (most of them I made) and had closets-full of clothes and more than a hundred bags. I was a good 10-15 pounds thinner then (blame the Google 15 for my current weight) and was having so much fun going out with friends. I can say I was a totally different person before 2008.

In the last few years I've just felt feeling more tired every day especially after I had pneumonia/heart failure. Typhoon Ondoy took away my shoe collection and most of my clothes and ever since I just thought it would be better to live my life simply. My quality of life had become affected. Now I feel much more like the old me and the first indication is I'm writing more and I feel like there's a well of energy inside me wanting to be released. And I seriously want to go out and shop for a new set of clothes (but I don't want to wear high heels anymore), accessories (maybe I'll start making some again) and bags. Well that's just on the surface level and I think the practical person in me wouldn't really splurge (I'm planning to follow my VP's wife advice about how much stuff to have).

The last few weeks I've been home since my second discharge from the hospital has been therapeutic. I've managed to re-connect with friends (through social media) and I can say I have a social life of sorts. I'm stuck at home but have been getting a lot of visits. I realized that in the last decade I've shied away from opening myself fully to new friendships. I've been very cautious because of some traumatic experiences that broke my heart figuratively. I'm so happy I've been given this break to re-connect and strengthen old ties. This has helped me avoid the post-heart-surgery depression trap which a lot of patients go through.

But unlike Humpty Dumpty with the grace of God and love of my family and friends I'm slowly being put together again.

So this is what 100% blood flow means ;)

Faith and Love

2013-03-03T12:33:00.001+08:00

Last night I forgot to drink my painkillers. I just took one tablet in the morning yesterday since I thought it would be good to aggressively wean away from drinking painkillers. My cardio also said that it would be really good if I stop drinking medicine already so I will likely be off my meds by end of this week.

When I woke up in ICU the day after surgery my reaction was, "OMG I survived and I'm alive!" I immediately said a prayer of thanks. I did not expect though to experience a lot of pain weeks following surgery. From my readings I missed the fact that the surgeon would break my sternum during surgery and this would cause a lot of pain. I was given different kinds of painkillers but sometimes the pain would just be unbearable. I would just pray for healing and strength whenever this happened.

I surprisingly woke up today feeling much better than a week ago. After a short trip to have lunch at the office I just stayed home the past few days resting. My new found friend Eng, a pharmacist based in Australia, mentioned that I need lots of rest so my heart and other organs can adjust back to each other. I didn't know that going through surgery requires a lot of rest and physiotherapy. I had to re-learn how to sit up, walk and breathe.

I couldn't do things on my own. I couldn't bath myself nor dress myself, couldn't lift a mug, couldn't open the fridge. I couldn't get up without help. Sweetie had to spoon feed me when I was in the hospital because I kept falling a sleep and lifting the spoon was just hard. I've been pretty useless the past 2 months. I'm better now though. I can breathe better, can walk, can bath and dress myself, done some cooking with help, can lift a glass of water and can lift my old laptop (but not yet carry it around). All these because of the love and patience of my family and friends who have been cheering me on.

Faith and love, important ingredients for recovery :)

My Heart Valve Surgery Timeline

2013-03-01T09:30:00.000+08:00

Each patient reacts and recuperates differently according to the book I read. I'm definitely one of those who deviated from the process since it's taking me a long time to recover. Thought I'd post and update my timeline here on my blog:

Photo taken while I was waiting for surgery time.

January 7 - surgery day. Admitted in the morning. Surgery originally scheduled at 1 in the afternoon but started at 3 in the afternoon. It was supposed to last just 2.5 hours, but mine took 4.5 hours. Doc mentioned that I had responded differently to the heart-lung machine and they had a hard time getting to my heart because of the lake of veins I had inside.

This was a nervous smile.

January 7 - 10 - 4 days in ICU instead of just a night. I luckily woke up without a tube in my mouth, but was very thirsty. Nurse made me some Milo and I luckily didn't have an allergy. Actually saw doctor take out 2 long tubes from my tummy. He said he had to leave it in longer because I had difficulty breathing. Started to use the spiro, dismally at only 400 ml. Started wearing stockings to prevent DVT.

Taken the afternoon I was transferred from ICU with my good friend Tappy.

January 10, afternoon - moved to a 2-bed ward. The other patient was so noisy and causing me stress. Had a hard time coping alone in the evening. Started to feel extreme back pains.

January 11 - moved to single room. Felt much better but still couldn't get out of bed. Noticed I had a lot of things stuck on my body. Most of the meds were coming in through my neck (meep). Spiro results started to increase. Started to have a hard time sleeping.

January 12 - finally got to stand up and start using the bathroom to pee. Badly wanted to wash my hair. My brother flew in from Jakarta for a surprise visit.

Google Hangout with my nephews in Jakarta. (Had to teach my brother and the kids how to use it)

January 14 - Filipino nurse Ate Yoly who reminds me on my favorite aunt, Tita Olive, gave me a full bath. Felt much more human after she washed my hair. Started walking around the ward with assistance (short distance). Took several breaks in between (more like every ten steps). Started to feel more back pain and couldn't sleep lying down.

My first full bath!

January 15 - 22 - Doc said I had water in my lungs so they gave me meds to reduce it. Practiced walking everyday. Spiro results were at 750 ml maximum. Pain in back more apparent in the events. Barely sleeping at night. Also started to have asthma attacks. No appetite.

My former team mates come and visit with lots of goodies.

These slippers certainly kept me warm and became popular in my hospital wing.

January 22 - Doc thought I'd recover faster at home and I was discharged after 16 days in the hospital. The first car ride was horrific, felt nauseous all throughout the trip home. Took several breaks walking up to my apartment. Promptly had an asthma attack when I got home. It lasted until evening.

I was pretty cheerful because of meds, but was having severe back pains

during this time and was barely sleeping.

January 23 - 27 - recurring asthma attacks but still managed to sit up all day. Took naps after lunch and had to walk around the house with assistance. Could not take a bath and dress up independently. Gained back my appetite slowly. Had to use wheelchair when I visited the doctor and couldn't lie down on bed. Had to sleep sitting up.

January 28 - February 3 - had good days and bad days. Bad days meant I'd be coughing all day. Lost appetite whenever I was coughing. Jay went home on February 3.

February 6 - check up with doctors. Ended up getting readmitted. Emergency surgery done to remove fluid in my pericardium. Two drains were installed to drain fluid from my lungs. The 20 minute surgery lasted 2.5 hours.

February 7 - 11 - 5 day stay in ICU. One of the drains were taken out after 3 days. Received blood transfusion.

February 11 - 18 - moved to a single room after 5 days. Felt sad leaving the nice ICU nurses. Spiro results improved to 1,250 ml but went down to 1,000 when the drain was taken out on February 16. It was a relief to get rid of the alien fluids and this is the time I felt I was really on the right road to recovery.

February 18 - discharged from the hospital. Able to move the house unassisted. Filipino nurse Ate Jona gave me a complete bath.

*Didn't have much photos during this period because I felt so sick.

February 18 - 24 - was able to take a bath and dress myself independently although had to wear lose clothes. Some of the newer wounds still felt painful but the painkillers definitely helped. Didn't need a wheelchair when we went to see the doctor and to have my xray taken. Survived eating out at Marche and IKEA (separate days), but still walked very slowly.

February 24 - was able to drink coffee without having an asthma attack. Medicines greatly reduced, but had chest pains all day.

February 25 - made an emergency appointment with doctor because I still had chest pains in the morning. Doctor said it was probably because of the change in medicines. Felt much better after spending time with friends who visited.

February 27 - ventured out and had lunch at work. Went down the stairs and promptly got extremely tired.

Heart Support Pillow

2013-02-27T17:47:00.000+08:00

Prior to my surgery I read Adam Pick's book, "Patient's Guide to Heart Valve Surgery". One of the things he mentioned was a patient would need to support his/her chest after surgery. When I got out of ICU the nurse made a small pillow made out of folded towel for me to use as support for my chest. I clutched on it whenever I moved, coughed and walked around. I felt like I had to support my heart lest it falls off.

I did the same when I went home. Jay made a small pillow for me also with a folded towel to use as support. Later on I felt it was too hard so he bought a small pillow for me. It didn't feel all that comfortable though so I bought a heart-shaped pillow from IKEA. It had the right softness and was good support whenever I felt like lying on my self. The drawback though it was too huge and having told hold a pillow was tiresome.

My niece, Patricia, a fashion designer (she designed my wedding entourage's gowns) made a new pillow for me. It was the perfect size, thickness and it was soft and firm enough to use as a support pillow for my chest. It also had straps so it lessened the need to support it with my arms. Here's the prototype of the pillow:

Interested to buy a heart support pillow? Inquire here.

The 8-inch Wound

2013-02-25T09:14:00.000+08:00

My Mom made sure I didn't have any unsightly scars (especially on my legs). She was pretty strict when I was a child and she didn't allow me to play on the street. It didn't stop me though from going over our gate and playing outside or learning how to use a skateboard. Oh the scoldings I used to get! I guess I've always been the adventurous type.

Now I have this ghastly 8-inch scar across my chest. My doctor said it was supposed to be shorter, but I guess because of the complications they had to make it bigger. And then there are a few other smaller wounds from the second surgery I had to drain the fluid from my pericardium (heart sac) and lungs. Last January after my first discharge I started to cry when Sweetie was dressing me up. He asked me what was wrong and I said, "I'm so ugly now." He immediately reassured me that I wasn't ugly and that my wounds were going to settle and eventually go away.

It's been a month since that day and the main wound has indeed settled. It just looks like I have a red line on my chest. The smaller wounds are all drying up and shrinking. Time does heal all wounds, literally and figuratively. I'm so lucky I have a very loving and understanding husband. I guess I'll just have to suck it in and buy a tankini in case we go swimming this summer haha.

I'm now able to dress myself. It's still quite hard though to remove clothing but I've found a great solution -- shopping for clothes that would be easy to take off! I'm mindful though to keep my wound covered whenever I go out to prevent infection. I now see my scar though as a stamp. A new lease to live longer and provide my family a better quality of life when I'm better. And well I can still show off my thunder thighs since that part of me is still scar-free.

Happy Golden Birthday to my Kuya!

2013-02-23T10:15:00.000+08:00

Happy, happy golden birthday to my favorite, one and only, Kuya.

I wanted to post a photo of him carrying me when I was a baby to show that he was already a teenager when I was born. Unfortunately though the scanned photos are in my desktop in Manila.

My Kuya is is your stereotype of what an older brother should be -- protective, affectionate, a mentor, pilyo (naughty), spiritual and annoying (every so often). We were like cat and dog growing up because I'd always play my "bunso card" whenever I got annoyed with him.

It was my Kuya though who got me interested in computers. He enrolled me in logo programming summer class in Don Bosco. I'd stay with him in his office in Dutch Boy and take a short jeepney ride to school. He painstakingly taught me how to use his XT computer (which I later on inherited) and convinced our parents to upgrade my PC before I went to college. Through the years he guided me with my career decisions, taking an MBA and one thing he taught me to do was how to make an awesome resume.

My Kuya got married when I was just 14 years old so through the years I saw him less and less especially when he moved to Jakarta. He made sure we'd spend quality time whenever we were together. He's always been generous and spent for trips so we could come visit him. And he's the one who originally spent for my cardio visits in Singapore.

When I was in ICU after my surgery my Mom said I mumbled, "I want my Kuya." I remember I wanted to see my Dad but realized he's in heaven already and I instead said I wanted to see my brother. Two days later he surprised me by showing up in the hospital. He dropped everything he had planned for that weekend to come see me. Few weeks later he showed up at my apartment and spent the few hours of transit time he had to cook for me his special spaghetti.

I cannot imagine my life without my Kuya. We do still fight every so often, but he's more understanding now knowing I'm not supposed to get stressed (hehehe).

Happy, happy birthday Kuya! I was hoping to be there for your birthday but I'm still stuck in Singapore recuperating. I lent Mom to you though for a few days, but please return her tomorrow. Haha. Love you!

Leap of Faith

2013-02-16T15:35:00.001+08:00

As of today I've spent 27 days in the hospital since January 7 when I was admitted for my heart valve surgery. The surgery was necessary and it took me 10 years to finally agree to go through it. I did it for my family because their quality of life was suffering as well.

It has truly been a hard ordeal to go through but whenever I felt down and frustrated I would tell myself that God will not give me a trial I couldn't bear. I'd also remind myself that this is a short term sacrifice so my family can have a better life with me. I've been suffering the last 5 weeks, but my family has been with me every step of the way.

Jay, my Sweetie, is truly heaven sent. I don't think he slept the whole, month of January. He took care of me and monitored every breath I took. Made sure I ate and drank my meds and cheered me on. I cannot imagine going through this without him. He's back in Manila now for work but dropped everything when I said I was readmitted (thanks to all his bosses and colleagues at the embassy).

My Mom is the strongest person I know in the whole wide world. She takes everything in stride and has been my rock. She's 76 now but is acting as my full time private nurse. Hope I'm not being so much a burden.

My son Miguel. I know he's worried sick about me. He's been awesome at taking care of me and has been acting as my late evening nurse (oftentimes I couldn't sleep so I need company). Got lost a couple of times in Singapore, but he's gotten the hang of it.

My Kuya who's gone out of his way to surprise me with visits. Mom said I mumbled that I wanted to see him when I was still in ICU. He's a very busy guy so I'm really thankful that he came and even cooked spaghetti for me. The video greetings his family and my Ate sent was also very helpful and encouraging.

My boss, my colleagues, my friends for all the love, care, visits, helping in making things easier for me and my family, food deliveries, funny video greetings, funny cards, care package. Thank you. My doc said I must've done something really good because I wasn't being treated as another statistic.

Heart surgery is a huge leap of faith and only the brave can do it according to my doctor. You never really know what may happen. My case wasn't an easy one for Dr. Shankar and Dr. Koo but they made sure I got the best medical care.

I'm just probably 70% through with this ordeal. I still need to heal my wounds and regain my strength. I painstakingly typed this post on my tablet hoping it would help others who are going through the same thing go through it with deep faith and love.

Thank you Lord.

A Brand New Heart

2013-02-02T12:13:00.001+08:00

It's been almost 4 weeks since I underwent mitral valve repair. I would've been able to blog earlier but things got delayed because of complications. I was just supposed to be in the hospital for 5 days - 2.5 hours in surgery, 2 days in ICU and 3 days in ward, but that wasn't the case. Surgery took 4.5 hours due to some complications and my surgeon said that my body reacted differently to the heart-lung machine (or something). I had to be monitored closely for four days. I stayed in the hospital longer than expected because I reacted differently to the medicines and had water in my lungs.

When I woke up the day after the surgery my first thought was, "I survived! I'm alive!" I promptly conked out after that and vaguely remember being given a sponge bath by the nurse. I was really thirsty when I regained consciousness. The nurse gave me some water but said I couldn't have more. Later on she made me the yummiest cup of Milo (I don't really drink Milo but it tasted really good that day). I felt really warm though so I had requested to have an electric fan by my bed. I had a gazillion tubes and plugs sticking out of me.

Sweetie, Miguel and my Mom were there all the time. It was freezing my ICU room though so they just went in and out. On the fourth day I was transferred to a double ward (single rooms were out), but my doctor took pity on me because the other patient was very noisy so he pressured the hospital to have me transferred to a single room the next day.

I was totally helpless during that time. I'm glad though I was assigned to the best nurse station - 9 East. There were a number of Filipino nurses too who knew I was desperate for a bath. The Filipino nurse, Ate Yoly, gave me my first bath and it really made me feel human again. I was in a lot of pain, not because of the surgery, but because of the water that entered my lungs. I had a hard time breathing and it hampered my recovery. As days passed the tubes and plugs sticking out of me were taken out. The vampire though came everyday to collect blood. Good thing she was really nice and made sure my arm didn't bruise.

My heart was in pretty bad shape before surgery. It was already enlarged and I was running the risk of progressing to 30% blood flow, but now my heart is like brand new. It had adjusted well from the repair (I sometimes hear a ticking sound though hehe) and is back to normal size. My cardio said he's very happy about how it had adjusted. I'm lucky too that I don't need blood thinning meds and that means I can eat anything. My recovery has just been held back by the water in my lungs, but after coughing up so much phlegm in the last 2 weeks I hope it's already gone.

I'm still pretty much dependent on many things. It seems only my fingers are working well (for typing). The next few weeks would be focused on regaining my strength and independence. Today's a really good day and I'm just hoping everyday would be a good day so I can go back to work.

Thank you so much to everyone for your prayers and support.

Out for Tweaking

2013-01-07T10:00:00.000+08:00

My cardiologist lit up like a Christmas tree when I finally said yes to his proposal -- to finally repair my leaky valve. It's been almost a decade since I started to see him in Singapore and year-in, year-out he'd ask me if I was ready. I probably should've done it a year ago, but circumstances back then just wasn't right. I always believed that things always happen at the right time.

I know my whole family and all of my friends are nervous about what I'm about to go through today. I'm nervous too, but my parents taught me to have faith in God for anything. I told Sweetie last night that I felt like how I feel the night before one of my large scale events. He admonished me and said it isn't an event and that there won't be a thousand people around. It will just be my family and me but they are my world.

I'm glad I was so busy with our move the last few weeks. I didn't have time to go emo about what I'm about to go through and was able to spend every waking time I had with the most important people in my life. We still have a lot to go through and that's what I'm looking forward to in the coming months. They're actually more apprehensive while I'm writing this post.

Well whatever happens I leave it all to God. Please pray for me :)

We Clicked, the 1,895th Day

2012-12-31T23:45:00.000+08:00

Goodbye 2012, Hello 2013!

I'm writing this post about our third wedding anniversary and just half an hour before the new year kicks in. I unfortunately didn't complete my 30-day challenge this month to blog everyday. My flimsy excuse is - we moved and I haven't had stable internet in the last 2 weeks (I'm still trying to survive with just 3G but it's haaard!). Making our home livable has been my project in the last 2 weeks and so far we've settled into a daily routine.

The year has been both rewarding and challenging. I've flown countless miles in the last year and have been to places I never imagined I'd visit - Zurich, Morocco, Sri Lanka and Pakistan! Meeting many new friends across the globe -- Southeast Asia (Indonesia, Malaysia, Vietnam, Thailand, Sri Lanka, Cambodia, Singapore etc.) and my team mates in Africa, Latin America and those based in Europe. It's been hard though on my family, so 2013 is definitely going to be different.

I'd like to say though that the rewards far outweigh the challenges and just before the year ended we moved it to our shiny new, tiny home. We were so happy since we envisioned that we would move to our own place (and not rent anymore) by our third year anniversary. We had our house blessed last weekend by Fr. Evan. It's truly a huge achievement for us.

2013 is going to start with a few challenges. After almost a decade I've decided to have my heart repaired. My cardio has advised that I should do it now while my heart is strong and healthy to prevent any further damage. He did say that it's quite unusual for my condition to be advanced at my age. I felt sad when he said that, but I think God will only give us challenges that we can bear. We all leave in a few days to head back to Singapore for my surgery (so please pray for me!).

Now have to finish my post since I have to serve Media Noche already, just wanted to wish everyone a blessed and happy new year!

Panicking?

2012-12-13T23:35:00.001+08:00

Check out what Pinoys have searched this year on Google Zeitgeist.

Achievement Unlocked: New Home!

2012-12-12T20:57:00.001+08:00

Three years ago just before Sweetie I got married we tried to look for a place could afford to buy. We didn't so we ended up renting a place in the same village where I was born. It was really convenient since we were close to my parents. We attempted to buy a house a few months later but it was just not meant to be at that time. We then told ourselves that we'd take it slow but target to move to an owned-residence by our third year of marriage. We moved nearer to my old home a month after that fiasco so I could be nearer to my parents and because the house we were renting just had so many problems.

When I moved to Singapore last year my seatmate, Ishi, gave me some really good advise. He said I shouldn't rent a place just for myself in Singapore if my family wasn't moving with me. He said I should just stay with a friend and use the money to buy a condominium unit in Manila. Luckily my childhood friend who's lived in Singapore for 3 years already was looking for a housemate for her new apartment. I grabbed the chance to get one of her rooms so I could save for our planned home.

It was just after New Year when I realized I should get things going to find and buy a home so we could reach our goal. I remembered a proposal I got back in November 2010 about a place that was being built near our village. I immediately brought up the idea again with Sweetie and after careful review of a number of places we decided to buy the unit near where my Mom lives. Things started rolling in late February and we scrimped and saved (would you believe my weekly allowance when I'm in Singapore is just SGD50 a week?) so we could end our lease by the time it expired.

We ended up extending our lease for another quarter though because the unit wasn't ready yet, but TODAY, 12/12/12 we finally got it!

Thank you Lord! =)

Housewife Diary: the Horror Story

2012-12-11T13:21:00.002+08:00

Called up Mom to rant about cleaning the baget's room. I've been asking him to clean his room in the last few months. I didn't dare even enter his room for fear that I might step on a snake (just toys!). I haven't had a cleaning lady in the last few months because my Mom found out she was stealing, so she got fired. It's been hard to find trust-worthy help so we decided to just do the house chores ourselves except ironing clothes since my Mom insisted we just have it done by her helper.

Mom's helper eloped last week and just disappeared. She left an apology letter to my Mom to say she was always tired because she was pregnant and was too embarrassed to face her. Sayang, she was a good and efficient helper. I just hope she would be able to cope with her issue.

So I thought my Mom would commiserate with me, but she just chuckled and said, "He's a boy and they're just really like that." I was shocked! I'm messy too and my Mom used to fix my room all the time (until the day I left home when I got married) and she'd scold me each and every time. I figured though she liked doing it so it was fine. She wasn't one to read private stuff (it was my Dad who I caught reading my diary!!!), so I let her be.

I guess it's payback time since the bagets just doesn't seem to have time to clear out his stuff. I thought I'd need a shovel to clear out the floor of his room. It took me three hours, but I did find $100, PhP1,000 and lots of coins lying around. So maybe I'd just go ahead and confiscate it from him to teach him a lesson. He needs to learn the value of the things that are given to him and be more appreciative of what he has. Sermon sa akin yan pag-uwi nya mamya.

The House Wife Diary

2012-12-10T21:42:00.001+08:00

When I woke up this morning I headed straight to my desktop to log-on and start working and then I realized I took time off to spend time with my family and prepare for our move next week (I still sneaked in some time to check my work email heh). Anyway, I spent most of the day puttering around the house - walis, mop, scrubbed the bathroom, did the laundry, cleared out stuff from my part of the den and cooked dinner, and now I feel like my body wants to dismantle (hehehe).

And now my brain has just stopped functioning for the day... now I know why my Mom sleeps so early.

Zzzzzzzz...