The Jose Canseco Project

ASSISTS

2015-03-09T08:00:00.000-07:00

Over the weekend I watched two basketball games in which the announcers each made comments about changing what constitutes an assist in a basketball game.  After hearing this, I began to think of how these two changes to stat tracking would help to further quantify the contributions of basketball players.

The first game I watched was the Saturday MAAC quarterfinal match up between Siena and Iona.  During the game, after a nice pass led to a player being intentionally fouled to prevent an easy layup, the announced mentioned that at any point when a direct pass leads to a player being fouled the player who passed the ball should be credited with an assist. After hearing this, the first thing I thought of was Chris Paul.  I've seen plenty of Clipper games these last few years in which CP3 has got the ball to either Blake Griffin or DeAndre Jordan within five feet of the rim where they are then intentionally fouled to prevent a dunk or layup. CP3 could easily average 15 assists per game if these were credited as assists.

The second game that I watched was Sunday's NBA match up between the Warriors and the Clippers. At one point during the game, Jeff Van Gundy made a point that I had heard several times before but resonated more due to the thoughts from the previous days game. He mentioned that the basketball should incorporate the "hockey assist" to reward the player who made the first pass that eventually led to an easy score. I believe he made this point in reference to Stephen Curry making a pass to Draymond Green in the high post after getting doubled teamed and then Green making a quick pass before the defense could rotate to a cutting wing player for an easy dunk.

With both of these points floating around in my head, I started thinking about another way to further differentiate between assists while watching the Warriors vs. Clippers game.  What I came up with is this; Shouldn't an assist that leads to a higher percentage shot be worth more than one to a lower percentage shot? Basically after assists leading to lay ups or dunks should be valued higher than assists leading to a three point basket.

I know in todays NBA the three point shot is an integral aspect of the game and is more valued than long two point baskets at this point by most teams. The reason for this is that the difference between the percentage between a 20 foot 2 point jump shot and a 24 foot 3 point jump shot is, I'm assuming here, less than five percent which makes the five percent drop in shooting percentage worth it due to the inclusion of the extra point rewarded for making said 3 point attempt. I totally understand and agree with the logic there.

With all that being said, here is how I would quantify adjusted assists:

TYPE OF ASSIST	DISTANCE	VALUE
REGULAR	0 FT to 5 FT	4
REGULAR	5 FT to 15 FT	3
REGULAR	15 FT to 3 POINT LINE	2
REGULAR	3 POINT FT	1
HOCKEY	0 FT to 5 FT	2
HOCKEY	5 FT to 15 FT	1.5
HOCKEY	15 FT to 3 POINT LINE	1
HOCKEY	3 POINT FT	0.5
LEADS TO FOUL	0 FT to 5 FT	3
LEADS TO FOUL	5 FT to 15 FT	2.25
LEADS TO FOUL	15 FT to 3 POINT LINE	1.5
LEADS TO FOUL	3 POINT FT	0.75

When considering this attempt to value assists, the one thing I didn't include was contested versus an open shot. While I'd love to incorporate that into the tally, I couldn't think of a good way to quantify that at this point.

I plan on attempting to use this new value system at some point in the next week or so while watching the likes of Chris Paul, Russell Westbrook, Stephen Curry, John Wall, and Kyle Lowry. Since Chris Paul is widely considered the best point guard in the NBA, I'm curious to see if he consistently puts up the highest number and by how much. We'll see what happens.

NBA Thoughts.

2015-02-25T09:00:00.000-08:00

1. The Oklahoma City Thunder will finish the season as the fourth seed in the Western Conference. The Thunder currently sit in the 8th spot in a grueling Western Conference but they don't need to worry about passing four teams to get in the 4th slot out West. To get that 4th seed all they need to do is catch the Portland Trailblazers for first in the Northwest Division. As division champs they would be guaranteed no worse than the 4th seed in the playoffs. Currently the Thunder sit 5 games behind the Blazers with 25 games remaining.

2. What are the 76ers playing on doing with their first round pick this year? Odds are extremely likely the 76ers will end up picking in the top 5 of this years draft once again. Let's say the 76ers end up with the 3rd or 4th pick in the draft and the best available player on the board is Karl-Anthony Towns, do the Sixers draft another big man? If they draft Towns does that mean Nerlens Noel will be moved? I understand when you're in rebuilding mode the best thing to do is acquire as many assets as possible but at some point you need to start working towards a cohesive eight man rotation with parts that gel together. A lot of the attention will be on the marquee franchises in the lottery (Lakers, Celtics, Knicks) but I'll be watching the Sixers.

3. Derrick Rose is hurt, again. Unfortunate. Rose's career is going to end up with a lot of what if talk attached to it. I'm sure we'll hear plenty of "the Bulls are done" talk during the next few days along with a fair share of the Bulls may need to move on from Derrick Rose. That comes with the territory of a injury to a player of this magnitude. For myself I won't go there. If Joakim Noah is healthy, this team still has enough to compete in the Eastern Conference Playoffs. I'm curious to see how Coach Tibs distributes Rose's 30 minutes. Obviously Aaron Brooks will see the bulk of the minutes at point guard going forward. Based on the Bulls bench, I curious to see if Coach Tibs just ups the minutes of his seven remaining rotation guys or are we going to see E'Twaun Moore get some run? Something to watch for.

4.  The day after Phil Jackson tweeted his frustration with the Knicks effort, I discussed the Knicks situation with a friend.  Our discussion centered around the idea that, while we both are ecstatic that the Knicks are bottoming out this season, Phil Jackson may have bit off more than he can chew in New York. What we determine the ultimate success or failure of the Jackson tenure is what he's able to do in free agency during the next 2 to 3 years.
Jackson, fairly or not, is going to be held to the standard set by another all time great coach turned team president in Pat Riley. Riley has been able to sell players on joining his teams by telling stories of how his 1980s Laker teams and 1990s Knick teams had to come together as a group to achieve the ultimate success (ie. Magic couldn't do it without Kareem and Worthy).  Having read Riley's book, "The Winner Within"(while the book wasn't much for business motivation, it had some great basketball stories), it was no surprise to me when he convinced LeBron, Wade, and Bosh to commit to Miami together Jackson will have to do similar work to bring a championship to New York.
One final note on the Knicks, as our discussion was wrapping up, I tossed out the idea that who would have thought that Isiah Thomas would have been the best GM the Knicks have seen the past 15 years. We each agreed that Thomas had a great eye for talent before my friend said, "John, what about the Curry trade though?" I then let him know that those two first round picks that the Knicks traded for Eddie Curry ended up being Joakim Noah and LaMarcus Aldridge. We both conceded that perhaps Thomas was not the best GM of the last 15 years for the Knicks. Oh well.

5. The race for the 7th and 8th spot in the Eastern Conference. Right now you have six teams bunched up within 2.5 games of each other for those final 2 spots. Some thoughts on each team.
Miami - After the Drogic trade everyone is hoping to see LeBron and the Cavs vs Miami in round 1. I'd sign up for that.
Brooklyn - Could be a dangerous team if they get the line up and touches worked out. This has to be Brook Lopez's team if they're going to succeed.
Charlotte - The development of Cody Zeller and the return of Kemba Walker will determine if this team finds a way into the playoffs.
Detroit - The combination of Drummond and Monroe makes this a potentially scary team.
Indiana - The return of Paul George could make Indiana fun to watch come playoff time.
Boston - Coach Stevens has the Celtics flirting with the playoffs.  How will Isaiah Thomas boost the offense going forward?

Handicapping the field going forward I'd say Miami and Detroit are the favorite to make the playoffs as well as the two teams most likely to pull an upset in the first round.

Vintage MLB footage.

2015-02-18T09:00:00.000-08:00

I happened to catch an episode of Keith Obermann's show last week which included the above segment with Jonah Keri. While the news of MLB considering making adjustments to the strike zone is very significant, let's talk about the recently released 1920s film of some of baseball's all time greats.

Coming from a era where live film is rare, close up footage of Dazzy Vance, Ty Cobb, Babe Ruth and Walter Johnson is something to cherish. This clip is all the more special for containing shots of three of the original five members of the baseball hall of fame (Cobb, Ruth and Johnson; missing are Christy Matthewson and Honus Wagner).

While Ruth has always been considered somewhat of a demigod in baseball lore, I've always been intrigued by the legend of Johnson. As can be seen in the film footage, Johnson used a side arm sling shot delivery and is known to be the fastest throwing pitcher of his time by a wide margin. I've always figured that in a time where most pitchers probably threw in the 70 to 80 mph range, Johnson was able to bring it closer to 90 mph.

The legend has become more myth now, with stories of Johnson's fastball reaching 100mph. I guess that's part of the fun of any oral history, over time the story takes on a life of it's own.

Here's a recount by Ty Cobb on his first time seeing Walter Johnson pitch.

"On August 2, 1907, I encountered the most threatening sight I ever saw in the ball field. He was a rookie, and we licked our lips as we warmed up for the first game of a doubleheader in Washington. Evidently, manager Pongo Joe Cantillon of the Nats had picked a rube out of the cornfields of the deepest bushes to pitch against us. ... He was a tall, shambling galoot of about twenty, with arms so long they hung far out of his sleeves, and with a sidearm delivery that looked unimpressive at first glance. ... One of the Tigers imitated a cow mooing, and we hollered at Cantillon: 'Get the pitchfork ready, Joe—your hayseed's on his way back to the barn.' ... The first time I faced him, I watched him take that easy windup. And then something went past me that made me flinch. The thing just hissed with danger. We couldn't touch him. ... every one of us knew we'd met the most powerful arm ever turned loose in a ball park."

Socrates

2015-02-17T09:00:00.001-08:00

Circa 1988, my mother must have been fearful that playing so much Nintendo was turning my brain to shit that she bought the Socrates educational video gaming system.

First off, as a bit of background, the system came with several preloaded programs dealing with math, vocabulary, music, and art. We never bought any of the gaming cartridges, so even the most entertaining aspects of Socrates grew tiresome. Luckily for me, we bought the likes of Punchout!, Ducktales, and Contra. But instead of harking on the negatives, let me tell you what I enjoyed most about the Socrates system.

1. There was a vocabulary program which was basically a version of Hangman. Yep, the popular guessing game that most everyone enjoys as a child was the best this system had to offer. So in a time before my family bought its first PC, being able to play a version of hangman by myself was an entertaining option.

2. When I wasn't playing Hangman I was trying to create a masterpiece in the Super Painter program. I'd say this program can easily be compared to the basic paint programs that still come preloaded on computers today. While no adult in their right mind is going to attempt to draw using one of these basically paint programs, I'm sure some kids still get some enjoyment playing around the first few times with it. That's what I was dealing with in the late 80s. The first hundred times or so, it was fun to be able to use the spray paint options to write something on the screen but it eventually grew dull.

3. Socrates was a cool looking robot. Socrates himself was a blatant rip off of Johnny 5, who was in himself awesome. In 1988, a few short years after the release of the movie Short Circuit, there was no cooler robot than Johnny 5. Clearly the people at Mattel agreed and modeled their bot in a similar fashion. They say imitation is the greatest form of flattery but I'm sure if this gaming system actually made any money, the people at Tri-Star might have had something to say about a little copyright infringement.

4. The way the graphics and color loaded was very cool. Whenever a new screen would load, it would draw out the graphics and then fill them in with color. Still to this day, this is a cool graphics effect to me. Better than me describing it, if you haven't already, take a look at the video I included at the top so you have a better idea of what I mean.

That's it. I couldn't even come up with a fifth reason. I guess that's explanation enough as to why Socrates never made it big.

Atari

2015-02-17T09:00:00.000-08:00

In the future Atari games are going to be in museums.

That's the random thought that went through my head today. While I'm sure there are already some Atari games sitting in museums around the world today, my thoughts were geared further down the road.

First a precursor. Early in January I read Neuromancer, a 1984 novel by William Gibson. For those unfamiliar, Neuromancer is a futuristic sci-fi novel dealing with artificial intelligence and is credited with creating the idea of the matrix. Excellent read. Read this book. But I'm not here to write a review. The reason I bring it up is because a scene from the book is what sparked my thought tonight.

Towards the end of the story, while making his way through the home of a rich family that seemingly owns and runs this world, our main character notices the rooms are filled with relics from the past. For the reader, those relics are easily identifiable as everyday items from the 20th century.

While none of the items were specifically identified as video games, I'm guessing a more accurate view of future private and public collections will be heavily consisting of late 20th century electronics.

So, since we're still in the early stages of the electronic revolution, I would assume technologies from today will eventually be looked at as the all important precursors that helped develop society in say 500 years.

And after thinking about all this the next question that crossed my mind is, If in the future we develop a highly conscience artificial intelligence, will that AI view previous forms of computer processors and personal computers as it's ancestors? Will an AI desire to collect the remains of their ancestors lead to the war with the machines? I can only hope.

I think I may need to write a short story of a future AI scouring the remains of human civilization for their first champion, Pac-Man.

Speaking of Pac-Man, as you can see in the above picture, yes, I still have my Atari games from the early 80s. Why do I still have my Atari games you may ask? Maybe I held out hope that someday I would readily be able to purchase a replacement system and play the games again. It's as if my 1987 self knew there would be an eBay some day. Perhaps I'm just a hoarder. Regardless of intent, they're still here. For now at least.

You see instead of buying a new system, which I've been putting off for the better part of 10 years, I decided to attempt to sell the games on eBay and after selling the first game I'm starting to question my decision to do so. I suppose a feeling of nostalgia is making me remorseful of my choice. Perhaps I'm thinking if I hold onto the games my future progeny will possess some of the most valued technologies from the 20th century. Well, maybe I should consider getting a girlfriend before lending my mind to future progeny.

Either way, it's obvious the most prudent decision at this point is to buy myself a Atari 2600 and play some Moon Patrol.

SNL 40

2015-02-16T09:00:00.001-08:00

I'm looking forward to watching SNL 40 but with tempered expectations. I'm sure it will be a lot of fun seeing old cast members back but its rare something of this variety meets or exceeds expectations. So last night, instead of watching the SNL 40th anniversary special I was watching the NBA All Star game.

When two shows I want to watch are pitted against each other in the same time slot, I always go with watching the sports event live. Reason being, once you know the end result of a sporting event it loses all its drama and there is zero chance of me making it to tomorrow afternoon without catching the score of the game.

As far as SNL goes, someone could give me detailed descriptions of what they viewed as the three funniest moments of the night and all it would do is build up my excitement and make my want to tune in even more. So at some point in the next 48 hours, I'm sure I'll sit back and enjoy watching SNL 40. You know the likes of Billy Murray, Will Ferrell, Adam Sandler, and Eddie Murphy will bring their old reoccurring characters back to life.

Unfortunately for me, I already know that my favorite reoccurring character in SNL history, Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer, will not be appearing. Well, unless they decide to use a Phil Hartman hologram.

Hopefully they didn't use a Phil Hartman hologram.

Who am I kidding. If anyone is getting the hologram treatment its Chris Farley.

2015 Royal Rumble Running Diary

2015-02-16T09:00:00.000-08:00

7:58 PM – Thanks for tuning in for my 4^th annual Royal Rumble running diary. Coming into this year’s Royal Rumble, Roman Reigns is the clear favorite. While there doesn’t seem to be much debate in that, we should have some excitement in how they handle the triple threat title match. Will someone finally beat Brock Lesnar? Will Seth Rollins cash in his money in the bank after the match concludes? I need answers.

8:01 PM - Welcome to the 28^th annual Royal Rumble broadcasting live from Philadelphia!

8:01 PM – Oh you didn’t know? The New Age Outlaws are opening the show. Both Jesse James and Billy Gunn are wearing Philly Phanatic hats. Good start. Hopefully it helps to keep the crowd from turning on the show like we saw last year in Pittsburgh.

8:03 PM – And their opponents, The Ascension, two guys in face paint and shoulder pads. I guess someone in creative took a suggestion that WWE needed someone like Legion of Doom a bit too serious. Oh well. It’s time for us to watch a new team to get a push from the vets.

8:07 PM – Watching this match I can’t help but think about how far the WWE tag team division has fallen. There was a time where tag team action was a great place to develop new talent or even rebrand a character in need of a change. The good news is that in recent months it appears the WWE is trying to rebuild the division. I hope it works out that way.

8:11 PM – We have a winner. Michael Cole just announced the Ascension with their first major victory. We’ll have to see how many more will follow.

8:12 PM – Current promo is for a WWE version of Mortal Kombat called Immortals. I rather play a WWE version of Tetris.

8:18 PM – Up next, more tag team action. This time it’s for the title belts. The Miz and Mizdow square off against our champions, The Usos.

8:20 PM – The Mizdow gimmick has been fabulous. I hope they win back the belts just to see Mizdow carrying around the replica belts. Not likely but I can hope. Also, I’m not sure how many guys on the current roster could have pulled off the stunt double routine. First class performance by Mizdow.

8:24 PM - I’m hoping the inevitable Miz & Mizdow break up leads to a matchup between the two at WrestleMania. That match up would be a great way to kick of WrestleMania and ensure the crowd is warmed up.

8:29 PM - Speaking of WrestleMania, if I was booking the event, I would have Daniel Bryan vs Brock Lesnar for the WWE Championship. Roman Reigns vs Seth Rollins vs Dean Ambrose in a triple threat match to determine the number one contender. John Cena vs Rusev for the US title. Miz vs Misdow. HHH vs Sting. From what I’m hearing we’re going to see Bray Wyatt face the Undertaker. Yep. The dead man is coming back.

8:31 PM – Back to the action, your winners and still tag team champions, The Usos.

8:36 PM – Here come the Bella Twins. I’m so glad Nikki Bella got breast implants. Now I can finally tell her and Brie apart.

8:37 PM – Their opponents, Natalya and Paige. Side rant, bear with me. Paige’s entrance music, along with many of the other new entrance songs, are just 30 seconds of chorus that plays on repeat. What the hell WWE? I need at least three verses and a chorus preferable written with accurate descriptions of my favorite wrestlers’ personalities. Imagine if Hulk Hogan’s entrance music just told you he was a Real American who fights for the rights of every man over and over again. You would never know if you hurt his friends if you hurt his pride he’s got to be a man and can’t let it slide. Rant over.

8:43 PM – Fun in ring moment. Natalya just had Nikki on her shoulders preparing for a back body drop when you can clearly hear Natalya instructing Nikki to grab her hair so they could safely perform the move. I’ll accept it. Always remember, safety first ladies.

8:47 PM – And it’s over. Nikki and Brie just took turns beating on Natalya. Sorry but nothing exciting to report here. Is it time for the Triple threat match yet?

8:48 PM – Promo for what amounts to Rock em Sock em wrestlers. I think I may need to take five and create my own match between Hulk Hogan and Mr. Wonderful. For those of you looking for the actual name of this playset in the promo, its WWE Double Attack and total takedown figures. You’re welcome. Also, those who had over 1.5 Hulk Hogan references tonight are the real winners.

8:55 PM – Triple threat time!!! Sing it with me…John Cena Sucks. John Cena Sucks. John Cena Sucks. John Cena Sucks. No surprise that Philadelphia is booing Cena.

8:57 PM – Mr. Money in the Bank. Seth Rollins.

8:58 PM - The Beast Incarnate. You’re WWE World Heavyweight Champion. Brock Lesnar.

8:59 PM - JBL is rattling off Lesnar’s resume, starting with his high school wrestling record. JBL always goes the extra mile with his research. Thank you Mr. Layfield, thank you.

9:00 PM – Basically equal support from the crowd for Rollins and Lesnar. Should be interesting to see when these two square off how the crowd reacts.

9:02 PM – Do you want to know how awesome Brock Lesnar is right now? He uses one basic move, in the German suplex, and it’s devastating. If any other wrestler repeated this in a similar manner, he would get booed without mercy. I hope he stays with WWE beyond WrestleMania. There is some much that they could still do with his character going forward.

9:07 PM – Cena sets up Rollins for You can’t see me. Actually Cena can’t see Lesnar. Yet another German suplex. Classic WWE.

9:09 PM – More feats of strength from Lesnar. Rollins spring boarded from the top rope only to be caught by Lensar and given an F-5. This guy is something to behold.

9:11 PM – Curb stomp from Rollins on Lesnar only to have Cena break up the count. Action is picking up folks. Hold on to your butts.

9:12 PM – Lesnar just slipped out of the ring for a breather. No breaks here. Cena drove him through the barrier into the ring announcer area. That didn’t work. Cena tries the steal steps. Better, closer, warmer. Still not good enough though. Lesnar ended up on the announcers table and here comes Rollins off the top rope. It’s a move we’ve seen a hundred times before but Rollins was still impressive with his execution. The future is bright for Seth Rollins.

9:17 PM – Cena vs Rollins while Lesnar gets a breather. I’m going to take a guess that the Champ is down but not out.

9:19 PM – Rollins was just rescued from a STFU by his security team of Noble and Mercury. It always pays to have good help.

9:20 PM – In other news, Paul Heyman has been asking for medical assistance and the stretcher has arrived.

9:21 PM – More feats of strength. It’s Cena’s turn this time. With Noble and Mercury both on his shoulders, Cena delivers a double AA. AAAA or quad A, I suppose. He follows this up with one to Rollins. I would not like to read a stenographers recount of any John Cena match. AA AA Five Knuckle Shuffle STFU AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

9:22 PM – Michael Cole just informed the audience that Brock Lesnar has, at the least, a broken rib. I’m going to question his medical opinion here. I know Cole has to sell the fact that Lesnar is hurt to the audience but a broken rib? Come on Michael Cole, you’re better than that.

9:23 PM – Rollins is controlling the action. Cena just kicked out of cover after a curb stomp. In typical WWE fashion, when someone kicks out of your finishing move what do you do? Something bigger off course. Rollins is heading for the top rope.

9:24 PM – After performing some ridiculous flip off the top rope, Rollins’ cover was interrupted by Lesnar.

9:25 PM – One F-5 that Rollins back flipped out of, landing on his feet, just leads to another massive F-5. What an awesome finish and flurry of action which resulted in a Lesnar pinning of Rollins. The Beast is still your Champion.

9:28 PM – Rollins is left dazed in the ring clinging to the Money in the Bank briefcase. I hope he cashes it in at WrestleMania. How about that as a way to end the grandest stage of them all?

9:29 PM – Also, I’d be very happy with a Rollins vs Lesnar main event at WrestleMania. I know the WWE wants a typical good guy in that match but what better way to give Lesnar a run in that role then to have Triple H and the authority deem him unworthy as the face of the company and try to take the belt from him with their chosen disciple in Seth Rollins? I’d handicap the odds of this happening at say +2500. I’ve always been a fan of seeing the freakishly athletic wrestler face the giant with inhuman strength, ala Shawn Michaels vs Undertaker.

9:30 PM – Promo for a next month’s new PPV, WWE Fastlane. I wonder if they switched from the Elimination Chamber just because of Brock Lesnar. Perhaps they just decided it wasn’t a wise move to have uncertainty pertaining to who you champ will be at WrestleMania after Royal Rumble concludes. I’ll make sure to ask Triple H if I run into him.

9:32 PM – Promo for the Royal Rumble. I love the ideas of giving the statistics during the Royal Rumble promo but can we get some advanced metric stats? I mean come on. I know it’s the WWE, but I’m sure we could come up with some creative ones. We know Shawn Michaels has the most eliminations in Royal Rumble history but who has the most eliminations after entry number 30 has entered the ring? We’ll call that one EA30 (Eliminations after 30). How about how many other wrestlers are in the ring at the time of a particular wrestler’s elimination? Say someone like Big Show usually has several other wrestlers in the ring with him when he’s eliminated. Just making up numbers here but let’s put him at 12 career Rumbles with 53 men total in the ring at the points he was eliminated. That would give Big Show a 4.42 career DOE (Determinant of Elimination). Last one. I swear. It’s the best one as well. If we took the number at which you finished, giving a reverse value to the number at which you finished, 30 for the first man eliminated and 1 for the winner, averaged up the career finishes, with 1 being the best possible score and 30 being the worst, wouldn’t you determine who’s had the best and most consistent career in the Royal Rumble? Or at the least who’s had the ability to stay in the good graces of Vince and healthy the longest? I’m guessing Stone Cold or Hulk Hogan would have the best total here. I hope that was as fun for you as it was for me.

9:35 PM – Lilian Garcia is currently explaining the rule to the audience. I love that WWE does this as well.

9:36 PM - #1 – The Miz.

9:36 PM - There’s only one real question here. Is Mizdow number 2? I guess you could ask if The Miz is getting paid double tonight as well.

9:37 PM - #2 – R-Truth. What’s Up!!! What’s Up!!! One of these days I’ll look up the lyrics to R-Truth’s rap song. Today won’t be that day though.

9:40 PM - #3 – Bubby Ray Dudley. Well I didn’t see that coming. Are we going to get a tables, ladders, and chairs in the Royal Rumble now?

9:42 PM – The crowd is in the same mind set. The table chants have already started.

9:42 PM – #4 – Luke Harper. Before Harper could make it to the ring we have our first two eliminations at the hand of Bubba Ray. Thanks for participating Miz and R-Truth. Man, to think that the Miz went into WrestleMania as the Champ only a few years back. I might need to do some research on the worst choices to headline a WrestleMania. Don’t get me wrong, I like the Miz, but his career has really taken a nose dive.

9:44 PM - #5 – Bray Wyatt.

9:45 PM – Harper and Wyatt team up on Bubba Ray. The crowd wants Devon. Sorry. Not going to happen. Wyatt sends Bubba Ray packing.

9:46 PM - #6 – Curtis Axel.

9:46 PM – Check that. #6 - Erik Rowen. Rowen just stole Axel’s place in the Rumble. Axel now has the Perfect excuse as to why he didn’t win tonight. Look at me, with another Perfect pun. I’m on a role.

9:47 PM - It appeared for a second as if Harper and Rowen were going to double team Wyatt before it became every man for himself. I’m guessing someone screwed up and it didn’t happen. Wyatt tosses both of his henchmen. Wyatt stands alone.

9:48 PM - #7 – The Boogeyman.

9:49 PM – We got a 20 second weird off before The Boogeyman is sent packing. Waste of an entrance. But definitely better then Michael Cole in the ring.

9:50 PM - #8 – Sin Cara. WWE must sell an awful lot of luchador masks. That’s the only reason I can think of Sin Cara being in the Rumble.

9:51 PM – Adios Sin Cara.

9:51 PM – Wyatt has the mic in the ring sending an open invitation. I’m guessing he’s not going to like who he see’s next here.

9:52 PM - #9 – Zach Ryder. I guessed wrong.

9:53 PM – Two gems from JBL. First as Ryder was entering he informed us that no one has one from the #9 position, I’m guessing that will continue to hold true, and when Ryder was eliminated he let us know Sin Cara is Spanish for eliminated. Well done JBL.

9:54 PM - #10 – Daniel Bryan. YES! YES! YES!

9:54 PM – I have to ask, did Wyatt accidentally grab the mic one entrance early? My guess YES!!!

9:55 PM – Bryan is sending the crowd into a frenzy. Great move by the crowd at this point as well. We got the overhand YES point during the countdown to #11.

9:56 PM - #11 – Fandango.

9:57 PM - #12 – Tyson Kidd.

9:58 PM - #13 – Stardust.

9:58 PM – How many gimmicks has Cody Rhodes gone through in the past 5 years? Is he still going to be Stardust when Goldust finally hangs up the boots? I need to know.

9:59 PM – After eliminated Tyson Kidd, Daniel Bryan jumps through the ropes to hit Wyatt who already slipped under the bottom rope. I love when guys get a breather outside the ring during the Rumble or, even better, hide under the ring. The first Battle Royal I ever watched had The Mouth of the South Jimmy Hart win by hiding under the ring while the last two competitors in the ring knocked each other out simultaneously. For those curious about watching this I just did some quick research. It was a 22 man $50,000 battle royal in 1986. The last two competitors were Greg “The Hammer” Valentine and the Junk Yard Dog. You can purchase it here.

10:01 PM - #14 – DDP. Diamond Dallas Paige.

10:02 PM – We get a couple token diamond cutters and a reference to DDP Yoga from JBL. Everything is in order.

10:03 PM - #15 – Rusev.

10:03 PM - Time to clear some space. Rusev sends DDP and Fandango to an early exit.

10:04 PM – Side note. I love that Rusev is the US Champion. There’s nothing finer than when the WWE has a foreigner crap on the good old USA. I may be bias considering the Iron Shiek was the first wrestling villain on my youth.

10:05 PM – Bray Wyatt just eliminated Daniel Bryan. I did not see that coming and neither did the crowd.

10:06 PM - #16 – Goldust.

10:06 PM - I think reality just set in and the crowd in now realizing that Daniel Bryan was actually eliminated. Random boos for nothing followed by a Daniel Bryan chant. Are we getting a repeat from last year? Will the crowd boo the winner if it’s not Daniel Bryan? I hope not. If last year taught us anything it’s if you boo loud enough they’re winning to change any part of the storyline going forward.

10:08 PM - #17 – Kofi Kingston.

10:08 PM – Kofi is getting booed. This isn’t good. He’s your token Royal Rumble fan favorite. The Daniel Bryan chants continue. I can’t wait to hear how the announcers spin this.

10:09 PM - #18 – Adam Rose.

10:10 PM – Kofi just got tossed and was caught by the Rose buds (a collection of back stage Betty’s and groupies), who then carried him back into the ring. Right on cue Rusev tosses Adam Roses who is not tossed by the Rose Buds. Kofi is shown the door by Rusev moments later.

10:12 PM - #19 – Roman Reigns.

10:12 PM – The boos are raining down on Roman Reigns. Somewhere back stage Triple H just crapped in his pants.

10:13 PM – Goldust and Stardust and eliminated by Reigns. More boos. This isn’t looking good. Clearly the crowd knew that Roman Reigns was you likely winner and are directing their displeasure his way.

10:14 PM - #20 – Big E Langston.

10:15 PM - #21 – Damien Mizdow.

10:16 PM – The Miz just showed up to take Mizdow’s spot. Miz was knocked off the apron before he could enter and luckily Mizdow entered the ring. After a quick exit both Miz and Mizdow are left on the ground, ringside, with Miz showing his annoyance with Mizdow’s actions and Mizdow doing his stunt double routine. Hopefully the moment of humor gets the crowd to relax a bit.

10:17 PM - #22 – Jack Swagger.

10:18 PM – Back to back “We the People” chants. Maybe the city where the declaration of independence was signed can get behind a “Real American” and stop this boofest. Do it for Ben Franklin people.

10:19 PM - #23 – Ryback. The Big Guy. He looks hungry.

10:20 PM – I can’t be certain but it sounds like a CM Punk chant from the crowd. Sorry folks but that’s not happening tonight or anytime soon. On that note, I don’t watch my UFC, but I can’t wait to see CM Punk in the Octagon.

10:21 PM - #24 – Kane.

10:21 PM – Michael Cole just informed us that Kane is two eliminations shy of the Royal Rumble career record. Can I put money on that fact that he’ll get that tonight? Seriously. Cole doesn’t allude to things that aren’t certain to happen.

10:22 PM - #25 – Dean Ambrose. It appears we have a new fan favorite tonight. Sorry Jack Swagger.

10:23 PM - #26 – Titus O’Neil.

10:24 PM – Reigns and Ambrose sent O’Neil out in 4 seconds. Santino’s record is still intact. It was close though.

10:26 PM - #27 – Bad News Barrett.

10:26 PM – Currently nine wrestlers in the ring. It’s starting to get crowded.

10:27 PM - #28 – Cesaro. I’d love to know why Cesaro got buried on the card. I guess the “King of Swing” was getting to much pop as a heel.

10:29 PM – Big E is knocked out by Rusev making six eliminations for him tonight. I guess we know who’s getting the push tonight, Cena’s next adversary. Better luck than Umaga.

10:30 PM - #29 – Big Show.

10:30 PM – Kane and Big Show team up to eliminate Ryback and Swagger. The “we want Ziggler” chants have already begun. At least the crowd has been paying attention to who’s left to enter this year.

10:32 PM - #30 – Dolph Ziggler. Hold on a second, I need to put my “Stealing the show and your girlfriend” shirt on.

10:33 PM – Ok I’m set. Dolph enters with a fury and eliminated both Wade Barrett and Cesaro.

10:34 PM – Moments later Big Show gives Dolph a knockout punch. Kane and Big Show team up to eliminate Ziggler followed by Wyatt. Kane breaks the record. Thanks again for the inside information Cole.

10:36 PM – Kane and Big Show square off with Ambrose and Reigns, as the last four in the ring. Where the hell did Rusev go?

10:37 PM – Ambrose is slid over the top rope by Big Show and Kane. I got to say, I’m actually enjoying the use of the Authority working together in the Rumble. It would be better if these two giants were working together and also protecting someone such as Seth Rollins. Oh well. I’m sure they’ll break ranks soon enough.

10:40 PM – Right on cue, Big Show attempts to eliminate Kane while they both have Reigns teetering over the ropes.

10:41 PM – The Authority’s momentary lapse allows Reigns to gain the upper hand. In our final feat of strength of the night Reigns sends both Kane and Big Show over the top rope, using one arm per opponent to lift them up and over by their legs. WWE really loves trying to create supermen.

10:43 PM – The bell rings and Cole informs us that Roman Reigns is our 2015 Royal Rumble winner. But wait. It appears our crowd was paying closer attention than usual. While Kane and Big Show enter back into the ring to assault Reigns, the crowd serenades them with chants of “we want Rusev!”

10:45 PM – DO YOU SMELL WHAT THE ROCK IS COOKING?!!!

10:46 PM – Rocky comes to the aid of Reigns but the booing continues. What the hell Philly? The Rock and Reigns clear Big Show and Kane from the ring and The Rock leaves Reigns to bask in the glory of his victory. But wait. There’s more.

10:47 PM – Rusev slides out from under the ring to no one’s real surprise only to be eliminated by a waiting Roman Reigns.

10:47 PM – Your 2015 Royal Rumble winner – Roman Reigns.

10:48 PM – The Rock is standing in the ring, raising the hand of Roman Reigns and the crowd continues to boo. Philadelphia has booed Santa Claus and now they’ve booed The Rock. Unbelievable. Maybe WWE shouldn’t hold Royal Rumble’s in Pennsylvania anymore.

10:50 PM – Brock Lesnar vs Roman Reigns at WrestleMania. I got to say, I feel bad for Reigns right now. It’s absurd to say that the guy who just won the Royal Rumble and is set to headline WrestleMania just got a shit deal but it’s true. He just went from a fan favorite to the villain and will probably get his title shot taken away from him much in the same way Bautista did last year after the Royal Rumble. Can we agree right now that next year’s Royal Rumble will be held in say St. Louis?

Catching Up With Old Friends.

2014-06-09T09:00:00.000-07:00

With all the excitement surrounding the Star Wars franchise, I decided to go back and reread some of the books I read during my teenage years. My early teenage years were the peak of my Star Wars fandom where I read as many books as I could convince my mom to buy for me. So far in this process of returning to these books, I've gotten through Tales from the Cantina and Heir to the Empire. Both books were life changing at the time and were still a joy to read nearly 20 years later.

If you're familiar with either of these two books, I'm sure you quickly surmised that Tales from Jabba's Palace, Tales of the Bounty Hunter, Dark Force Rises, and The Last Command are the next four books on my Star Wars read list. Shadows of the Empire, The Courtship of Princess Leia, and the Jedi Academy Trilogy are also on my list before hopefully tackling some stories I never got around to reading.

All of this eventually leads to the new line of Star Wars novels set to kick off in November, starting with Tarkin and followed by Heir to the Jedi and Lords of the Sith. I'm hoping these three novels will be a great kickoff leading up to the release of Star Wars: Episode VII.

As for my rereading, the biggest take away from this process so far has been the realization of how mightily I struggled to pronounce the names of characters, locations, and ships as a teenager. I know reading wasn't my strongest suit at the time but seeing how easy it is now to read a name such as Talon Karrde had me a bit embarrassed of my younger self.

Are the Nightsisters coming to the big screen in Star Wars: Episode VII?

2014-06-03T09:00:00.000-07:00

A Star Wars universe that has been noticeably devoid of a female presence just added two more to its ranks.

According to a release from Lucasfilm, Lupita Nyong'o of "12 Years a Slave" and Gwendoline Christie of "Game of Thrones" will be joining the cast of Star Wars: Episode VII.

Perhaps the influx of female cast members means we will finally get a glimpse of the Nightsisters on the big screen as the antagonists in Episode VII. For those unfamiliar, the Nightsisters are a sect of witches that are comparable to the Sith.

Through "Star Wars: The Clone Wars", we know that the Nightsisters are from the planet Dathomir and use a combination of the Force and magic in their dark art. In the show, the Nightsisters appeared in several episodes before having their order nearly wiped out in an attack lead by General Grievous.

The Nightsisters originally appeared in the 1994 novel "The Courtship of Princess Leia" by Dave Wolveton. In the novel, the Nightsisters rode Rancors which were indigenous to the planet. Awesome.

Also through the Clone Wars cartoon, we know that the character of Darth Maul originates from Dathomir as well. He belonged to a sect known as the Nightbrothers who were subservient to the Nightsisters.

5 Minor League Prospects on the verge of being called up.

2014-06-01T09:00:00.001-07:00

With June's Super 2 deadline approaching, MLB teams will be looking to move their impact prospects to the major leagues. Here's a look at 5 Minor League players that will impact your favorite teams and fantasy baseball leagues this summer.

1. Andrew Heaney - LHP Florida Marlins

Regarded by many as the best LHP in minor league baseball, Heaney has dominated the competition this season. Between stops at AA and AAA, Heaney has made 11 appearances so far posting an ERA of 2.09 in 64 2/3 innings and a strikeout to walk ratio of 66/13.

The combination of his performance, the injury to staff ace Jose Fernandez, and that the Marlins are sitting in second place in the NL East all but guarantee a call up early in June to bolster the staff.

2. Gregory Polanco - RF Pittsburgh Pirates

A year after clinching their first playoff berth in 21 years, the Pirates have struggled offensively and sit 5 games under .500 as of June 1st. Their failure to get runners on base in front of reigning NL MVP Andrew McCutchen has allowed teams to pitch around him consistently and has been one of the driving forces behind the Pirates currently sitting 26 out of 30 teams in runs scored this season.

Gregory Polanco is batting .349 with 6 HRs and 46 RBIs through 54 games this season at AAA Indianapolis. In anticipation of his arrival, the Pirates have moved Polanco into the leadoff spot to allow him to see pitches in the spot in the batting order he will occupy in the majors.

3. Joc Pederson - CF Los Angeles Dodgers

The Los Angeles Dodgers find themselves in an eerily similar position to where they were entering June last season. The Dodgers once again face a surplus of outfielders with a top prospect scorching hot in the minors knocking on the door.

Last season saw a June 2 call up of Yasiel Puig and the Dodgers may be contemplating a similar move with Joc Pederson this year. Through 52 games at AAA Albuquerque, Pederson is hitting .337 with 15 HRs and 13 SBs.

The recent move of Matt Kemp from CF to LF is the first move towards bringing Pederson to the majors. The Dodgers will look to move either Carl Crawford or Andre Either to another team before the July deadline thus delaying Pederson's arrival ever so slightly.

4. Jonathan Singleton - 1B Houston Astros

After the sale of the team in 2011, the Houston Astros switch into rebuilding mode. This season we're seeing the first wave of prospects that are part of that process make their way to the majors led by George Springer and soon will be followed by power hitting first baseman Jonathan Singleton.

Singleton has shown improvements in both power and contact at AAA Oklahoma City this season after struggling in the same spot last season. The Astros received Singleton from the Philadelphia Phillies in the trade for Hunter Pence during the 2011 season and it finally starting to show the promise the Astros anticipated.

5. Taijuan Walker - RHP Seattle Mariners

If not for injury Taijuan Walker would have started the season in the Major Leagues. After a brief cup of coffee in the majors last season, Walker was penciled in to the third spot in the Mariners rotation during spring training before being put on the DL with a minor shoulder injury.

Walker is currently on a rehab assignment at AAA Tacoma and should find himself back in the majors after a few more outings.

Here are five other players whose arrival will be slightly delayed to the Major Leagues but you'll see them make an impact at the big league level before the end of the season.

Noah Syndergaard - RHP New York Mets
Javier Baez - SS Chicago Cubs
Archie Bradley - RHP Arizona Diamondbacks
Francisco Lindor - SS Cleveland Indians
Ken Giles - RHP Philadelphia Phillies

Speculating on recent Star Wars rumors.

2014-06-01T09:00:00.000-07:00

This week word leaked out that Disney has mapped out films in the Star Wars franchise through the end of the decade. While there hasn't been an official conformation from Disney or Lucas film regarding this schedule, it is consistent with the statements from Disney executives stating that we will see at least one Star Wars film per year going forward. Here is the timeline that was released:

2015: Episode VII

2016: Boba Fett

2017: Episode VIII

2018: Han Solo

2019: Episode IX

2020: Red Five

For our purposes today, I'd like to take a look at the three standalone origin films; Boba Fett, Han Solo and Red Five.

First off, those three names pertain to specific characters in the Star Wars universe. Boba Fett and Han Solo are two of the most popular characters in the Star Wars Universe and for those unfamiliar with Red Five, I'll explain later in this post about who that is.

All three films are likely to take place in the 19 year time frame between the ending of Episode III: Revenge of the Sith and Episode IV: A New Hope. That will allow for Disney to use characters even casual Star Wars fans are familiar with at different stages of their lives and bridge the gap between the two franchises.

Let's take a closer look at each film individually and speculate about what may be.

BOBA FETT

STORY:

The early rumors involving this film had Lawrence Kasdan penning a script with someone killing the original Boba Fett, taking his armor and assuming his identity. While we now know that this film will be directed by filmmaker Gareth Edwards (Godzilla) and written by Gary Whitta (Book of Eli), I would bet that there was still some truth to that early Kasdan rumor. Kasdan likely wrote an outline or treatment for Disney to set the wheels in motion on this project.

Boba Fett is a bounty hunter by profession. I'm sure we'll see a story of hunter and prey.

CASTING:

The idea of someone killing Boba Fett and assuming his identity makes perfect sense from a casting stand point. The fact that they wouldn't have to use Daniel Logan (Boba Fett in Episode II) or someone who resembles him in the role would allow Disney to then open the casting up to stars that have an established box office track record. Building this project around a star is just standard risk management.

I wouldn't be surprised if one of two actors that were rumored to be attached to Episode VII were actually in discussion with Disney the whole time to play the role of Fett instead. Those gentlemen are Michael Fassbender and Benedict Cumberbatch.

The saying goes "there's a grain of truth in every lie". While their involvement in Episode VII has been proven untrue, perhaps the rumors weren't completely off base.

HAN SOLO

STORY:

Out of the three origin stories I'd have to say that the Han Solo story has me most nervous. Han Solo is the most established out of the three characters associated with the stand alone films. While we don't know much about his past (he's a smuggler, he won the Falcon from Lando, and he lost one of Jabba's shipments to the Imperials) we know enough about his character to feel certain actions wouldn't be consistent with the original trilogy.

The idea of origin stories in general has a bad connotation to me. I am hopeful that Disney realizes that you don't need to waste two hours telling the history of a character when you can just jump into an adventure with an established character.

Part of the greatness about the original trilogy is that they don't waste an entire film explain the origins of the Empire and Rebellion; you just jump right into the thick of it.

I don't need to know why Han Solo became a smuggler. If they play it right they will start with him already an established smuggler avoiding Imperial cruisers and finishing a job at the onset of the movie.

As for some wishful thinking, after finishing said job he could be contacted about a big job where he's smuggling secretive cargo with a huge payday, no questions asked (right up Han's alley). His curiosity gets the best of him however and he has to check what it is in the containers he shipping. Turns out he's hauling Wookies into slavery, one of which would be Chewbacca. The idea of transporting Wookies into a life of slavery doesn't sit well with Han so he frees the Wookies and has a side kick for life in Chewbacca. While opening the containers Han triggered a sensor that alerted his employers and now he has them hot on his trail.

If you can't tell, I truly want this movie to be excellent.

CASTING:

When Disney first acquired the rights to Star Wars, the most prevalent name I read in rumors was that of Zac Efron. Another name that came up in rumors almost as frequently was that of Ryan Gosling.

Once again, we know that neither one of them is going to be in Episode VII but that doesn't mean that either of them wasn't approached about a role within the Star Wars universe.

Both actors have a history with Disney and have the looks to fill the role of Han Solo. If I had to guess at this point I would say we'll be seeing Efron as Solo in 2018.

RED FIVE:

STORY:

The name Red Five is a bit ambiguous and for good reason at this point. With the project still several years away from completion, Disney likely has a good idea as to what character from the Star Wars universe will be Red Five but that it is still not written in stone.

As for some background and history, Red Five is the call signal of the fifth member of the Red Squadron in the Rebel Alliance. It was the call signal that Luke Skywalker used during the Battle of Yavin where he blew up the first Death Star as a member of the Red Squadron but for this film we'll be looking at someone who held that call signal prior to Luke's joining the Rebellion.

This movie will likely show the Rebellion in its infancy and the formation of the Red Squadron while revolving around the story of the character of Red Five.

The character that I alluded to early most likely to be Red Five would be Wedge Antilles. Wedge flew as Red 2 during the battle of Yavin and Red Leader during the Battle of Endor. He's the one who piloted the X-Wing that helped to blow up the second Death Star alongside Lando Calrissian. He's also the only known pilot to survive both Death Star attacks.

The actor who portrayed Wedge Antilles in Return of the Jedi, Dennis Lawson, recently stated that he was approached to reprise the role of Wedge in Episode VII but declined.

CASTING:

With this film slated for 2020 it's not realistic to know who would play the part of Wedge Antilles at this point but I'm sure Disney will find someone in their early 20s to fit the bill.

I'm hopeful that this movie bridges the gap between Episode III and IV. I'd love to see Jimmy Smits reprise his role of Bail Organa for starters and for us to get a more detailed view of Alderaan.

We could also see younger versions of characters such as Admiral Ackbar, Mon Mothma, and General Crix Madine in supporting roles once again.

The Simpsons Tapped Out Future Content

2014-05-14T09:00:00.000-07:00

As a Tapped Out Addict, I frequently find myself considering what content I will eventually be able to add to my town from future updates. Like with most of my musings, I decided to scour the internet hoping to quench my desire for useless knowledge. Unfortunately for me, I was only able to find lists that were created in 2012 and have since seen all or most characters added to the game. Luckily for you, I decided to make my own list. Well, two lists actually. The first list is of characters that would be part of a regular level update as free or premium items. The second list contains characters that would work better as part of the Friend Points Rewards with no tasks or buildings associated. Enjoy.

Free/Premium Characters

Honorable Mentions: Frank Grimes, Lyle Lanley, Arthur Crandall & Gabbo, Ruth Powers, Captain Lance Murdoch, Janey Powell, Wendell Borton, Lindsay Naegle, Cookie Kwan and Stacey Lovell

15. Artie Ziff: Tell me, Homer, what's it like being married to Marge?

14. Old Jewish Man: Old grey mare she ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be, ain't what she used to be.

13. Mr. Bergstrom: And for the record, there were a few Jewish cowboys. Big guys, who were great shots, and spent money freely.

12. Mrs. Jacqueline Bouvier: I have laryngitis. It hurts to talk. So I'll just say one thing...You never do anything right.

11. Dr. Marvin Monroe: This is not the way to get healthy!

10. Akira: You can if you believe you can.

9. Helen and Jessica Lovejoy: From now on, I'll use my gossip for good instead of evil.

8. Lunch lady Doris/Dora Freedman: The cafeteria staff is complaining about the mice in the kitchen. I want to hire a new staff.

7. Lionel Hutz: And as for your case, don't you worry. I've argued in front of every judge in the state. Often as a lawyer.

6. Herb Powell: Now, what do I do? I mean, this is the guy who ruined me. Then again, he's my brother... So many conflicting emotions. How to express them?

5. Bleeding Gums Murphy: The blues isn't about feeling better. It's about making other people feel WORSE, and making a few bucks while you're at it.

4. Rabbi Hyman Krustofski: I have no son!

3. Stonecutter Number One: And now for the final ordeal: The Paddling Of The Swollen Ass! With paddles.

2. Radioactive Man and Fallout Boy: Billowing backpacks Radioactive Man, it's the worst villian of them all, the Scoutmaster! I see him, Fallout Boy.

1. Troy McClure: What a terrible waste... Hi, I'm actor Troy McClure! You might remember me from such driver's ed films as "Alice's Adventures Through The Windshield Glass" and "The Decapitation of Larry Leadfoot." For the next sixty minutes, we'll be seeing actual film of car crash victims.

The greatest peripheral character The Simpsons has every seen, Troy McClure needs to be included in this game.

Friend Points Rewards Characters

10. Leon Kompowsky/Michael Jackson

So we have Calmwood Mental Hospital but no patients? (As of now, Ned can't check in.) Even though Leon/Michael was committed to the New Bedlam Insane Asylum, all Tapped Out Springfield's could use a good mental patient wandering the streets.

9. Lisa's Pony: Princess

Bart got Stampy, now it's only fair that Lisa gets her pony, Princess. I loved the Godfather reference when Lisa woke up to pony head next to her in the episode Lisa's Pony. The Simpsons' writers have always excelled in their references to cinema.

8. Dr. Hector Von Colossus

Dr. Colossus first appeared as a photo of one of Malibu Stacey's (Stacey Lovell) ex-husbands and had his only line in Who Shot Mr. Burns?. A very interesting character that the writers have refrained from using for whatever reasons. Ideal for a Friend Points Reward.

7. Corporal Punishment

The enforcer from the Krusty Show, Corporal Punishment seems like a more likely choice than Tina Ballerina for inclusion in Tapped Out. Hopefully the game is around long enough that we get to see Sideshow Luke Perry.

6. Stewart (Power Plant Duck)

Stewart was shown as an employee at the Nuclear Power Plant during the episode The Last Temptation of Homer which also introduced us to Mindy Simmons. A duck in a hardhat would fit right in with this game. Monty Burns still stands by his hiring practices.

5. Sir Oinks-A-Lot

The mascot from Springfield A&M, Sir Oinks-A-Lot, would be the latest in a long line of animals and pets to be apart of The Simpsons: Tapped Out. At some point, I'd like to see the college nerds included in the game as well.

4. The Devil

I know the game has a Ned Flanders version of the devil but I've always been partial to the version from Bart Gets Hit By A Car. I guess the problem is that the devil has shown up with several different appearances through the years.

3. Gunter & Ernst & Anastasia

I'm sure these three performers from Monty Burns Casino could work as regular level update characters if the casino was ever added. Since we've already seen one casino (Caesar's Pow-Wow Casino), I find it unlikely that we'd get two. So they get demoted to Friend Points Rewards status.

2. Bear

Since Bart and Lisa are covered, it's time for Maggie's own furry friend/friends. Having a bear sucking on a pacifier seems just right for the Tapped Out streets. Perhaps you'd be able to set the bear to a task of walking around with Maggie much like the episode The Call of the Simpsons from season 1.

1. Rasputin The Friendly Russian & Professor Werner Von Brawn

One of my favorite minor moments from any episode is the scene in Bart the Daredevil where Homer (at Moe's) and Bart (at home) are watching the Rasputin vs. Von Brawn match and see the Truckasaurus commercial (I'd gladly pay 10,000,000 for Truckasaurus). As a fan of both wrestling and monster trucks, this combination of the two within 2 minutes of television still amazes me over 20 years later.

If you miss this, you'd better be dead... or in jail...And if you're in jail, break out!

Just when you think you know the answers, I change the questions.

2014-05-09T22:35:00.000-07:00

When starting this blog, I wanted to include a regular piece where I answered question, so when coming up with a title I took a page out of the playbook of one of the greatest talkers in wrestling history, "Rowdy" Roddy Piper. If all goes according to plan, "Just when you think you know the answers, I changed the questions" will hopefully include some of the same hostility and aggression that Piper regularly displayed on Piper's Pit.

Today's edition was specifically inspired by Chuck Klosterman's HYPERtheticals: 50 questions for insane conversation. I found the questions to be more fun than insane and for those interested in checking them out, you can buy it here. Here are two questions from Klosterman and my responses.

1.Forever 75

You celebrate your 75th birthday in good health. As far as you can tell, you are a spry, relatively normal 75-year-old. And this condition does not seem to change over time: When you celebrate your 80th birthday, you look and feel exactly as you did on your 75th. When you hit 90, you still look and feel 75. On your 100th birthday, you realize that most of your friends are now dead or dying -- but physically, you are the same independent person you were 25 years ago. You hit age 110 with the same results. Every year, you are celebrating a new birthday without physically evolving beyond the age of 75. Doctors have no explanation for this inexplicable stasis.

How old would you have to be before you would start to seriously believe that you are immortal?

Let's start off with this. I'm currently 33. I'll be 75 in the year 2056. That's pretty crazy to think about right there. It feels weird even thinking about the year 2056. So with some more simple math I'd be 110 in the year 2091. Even crazier.

The oldest recorded living person to this point lived to be 122. Living to 122 would put me in the year 2103. Life in the 22nd century. Now let's consider something else, advances in technology and medicine. That record of 122 is highly likely to be blown past well before I get there.

Now, I’m sure if I end up being as vigorous and energetic at 90 as I was at 75 I would begin to mock death. I'd have to crack some jokes about being a tenth of the way to Yoda's age when he died and knowing I was certainly heading for a life of 900 years or about how I figured I'd live forever but assumed it would be a life with my brain incased in the spider droid vessel of a B'omarr monk. Joking aside, how old would I have to be to start seriously thinking I'm immortal?

125. While the thought would have crept into my consciousness by the time I was 90, there would always have been doubt. I have to think 50 years without showing any signs of aging would have me convinced I will live forever regardless of the advances made to halt the effects of aging.

While I always thought I'd live forever, I figured it would be as a B'omarr monk.

2. Front Page News

Defying all expectation, a group of Scottish marine biologists capture a live Loch Ness Monster. In an almost unbelievable coincidence, a bear hunter in the Pacific Northwest shoots a Sasquatch in the thigh, thereby allowing zoologists to take the furry monster into captivity. These events happen on the same afternoon. That evening, the president announces he may have thyroid cancer and will undergo a biopsy later that week.

You are the front page editor of The New York Times: What do you play as the biggest story?

Sasquatch. There is no debating this and the logic is simple.

Let's deal with the president first. According to the statistics I found while researching this dilemma male patients with thyroid cancer have a 74% survival rate in the first five years and we don't even know the president has thyroid cancer. He's just going for a biopsy which is an everyday occurrence. Sorry Mr. President, you're not cracking the top 2 stories on this day. He's gone.

Now to the real debate, BIGFOOT vs. NESSIE.

First off, salt water oceans make up 71 percent of the earth’s surface. We as humans are barely able to search the depths of the seas. Hundreds of thousands of species are waiting to be discovered within the confines of the Earth’s oceans as you read this. To bring current events into the equation, we can't find a single plane that is in the ocean and this plane was sending out a transmission to help locate it. While improbable, the idea that a live Loch Ness Monster exists is still much greater than that of Sasquatch.

Secondly, this is the New York Times not some UK newspaper. Location has to be a consideration as well. While the New York Times considers itself a global newspaper, it's main audience is still the people of the United States. A discovery in the USA definitely trumps that of a UK one.

The good news for me as the front page editor of The New York Times is this, there is room for three headlines above the fold of the front page. So while Sasquatch will get top billing on the top right corner, all three stories will be there to see.

Episode VII. What is the Ancient Fear?

2014-05-08T09:00:00.000-07:00

If you were the Jedi Order what would you fear?

To answer that question we’ll borrow a line from Jedi Master Yoda. In Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace, Yoda says, "Always two there are, no more, no less. A master and an apprentice.” The Star Wars universe has established this as the Rule of 2. According to Star Wars Wikipedia page the Rule of 2 is defined as “that there must be only two Sith Lords at a time: a master to embody power, and an apprentice to crave it and eventually overthrow his master and adopt an apprentice of his own.”

The ancient fear referred to in the working title for Episode VII is simple; the Sith are no longer following the Rule of 2.

A master and an apprentice.

In the six previous installments of the Star Wars franchise we’ve always seen the Jedi battling one Dark Lord of the Sith at a time with brief moments against two at the end of each of the trilogies. Think about a movie where the likes of Darth Maul, Darth Tyranus, Darth Vader, and Darth Sidious were all on the screen at the same time, would that be something you were interested in watching?

We're facing the realistic possibility of three films where Luke Skywalker and a fragile new Jedi Order are faced with the daunting task of battling numerous Sith Lords. Count me in for that.

*Just to elaborate on this a little more, here is how I would have the story play out. I would have the back story be that Christopher Lee's character (Count Dooku/Darth Tyranus), having been a member of the Jedi order, never truly saw the rational behind the Rule of 2. Dooku decides to take on his own apprentice in secret and thus sets the ball in motion for a Sith Academy on a remote planet. Based on his age, the character that Max von Sydow is playing would make sense to be Dooku's former apprentice and master of the Sith academy. In the 50 years since Dooku's death, the academy very well could have amassed hundreds of Sith Lords who finally feel the time is right to strike and usher in the age of the Sith Order.

Straight to Video

2014-05-05T09:00:00.001-07:00

Happy Cinco de Mayo!
You have to love any holiday that is celebrated more in the good old USA than the country of its origin, Mexico. Either people will make any excuse to drink excessively or they really hate the French. I'm going with binge drinking as the logic behind the Cinco de Mayo craze here in the states but just incase you're someone who hates the French, Napoleon also died on Cinco de Mayo. So double bonus for you. Drink up.

Also on this date in history the Freedom 7 spacecraft put the first American, Alan Shepard, into outer space. Here's a video which details the Mercury Program's Freedom 7 and Alan Shepard's historic flight.

Side note pertaining to Alan Shepard. I recently finished reading Adventures in the Screen Trade by William Goldman. In the book, Goldman dedicates a chapter to his experience of adapting the novel The Right Stuff by Tom Wolfe into a screenplay. For those unfamiliar, The Right Stuff is a book about post WWII test pilots and the stories of Project Mercury astronauts selected by NASA for the space program one of whom was Alan Shepard. Point being, The Right Stuff is now on my to read list.

For those of you who don't read, no worries, they made a movie.

Beyond the Infinite

Watching those videos and writing that previous section got me to thinking about one of my favorite movies, 2001 A Space Odyssey directed by Stanley Kubrick. One of the urban legends attached to the ground breaking and influential film is that the band Pink Floyd was considered to record the soundtrack for the film. The story goes that the band were giving an advanced cut of the film and what today is known as their album Meddle was originally intended to be the soundtrack for the film. I suppose this story came to be when some fan years later popped 2001 into the VCR while listening to Pink Floyd and Wallah! a perfect match. Here is a video that syncs Pink Floyd's song Echoes with 2001 A Space Odyssey - Jupiter and Beyond the Infinite. I strongly encourage you to watch the entire video but if you can't handle a 24 minute video I understand, skip ahead to the 15:15 mark.

Room 237

If you thought that theory was bizarre, well, it's only going to get stranger from here on out. Probably the key component for the association between Pink Floyd and Stanley Kubrick's film in the above video was the invention of the VCR. The VCR ushered in a new era of film watching where a fan could now repeatedly watch a film and perhaps find hidden messages or greater themes that may have previously alluded them in a single theater viewing.

The movie Room 237 is a documentary that delves into this phenomena by letting fans of another Kubrick film, The Shining, expound upon their views of what was really transpiring on film. I went to go see Room 237 the week of it's release at the IFC Center in NYC last year. I became aware of the documentary several months prior when a writer I enjoy, Chuck Klosterman, wrote about his experience of seeing a screening of Room 237 at a film festival. Needless to say I was fascinated with one theory in particular that dealt with Kubrick's previous film 2001 A Space Odyssey, NASA, and The Shining. You starting to see how everything is coming together here? We'll get into that theory next though. First, for those interested in viewing the documentary, it is now available for viewing on Netflix. Here is the trailer for Room 237.

Now to the mother of all conspiracies, the lunar landing. One of the theories in the film Room 237 deals with the conspiracy that, after completing his work on 2001: A Space Odyssey, Kubrick was contacted by NASA to help them fake a filming of the upcoming Apollo 11 mission to the moon. The story goes that the US government felt the public would not get behind any space mission without some semblance of live video and/or sound to go along with the mission. Unable to send images and audio directly back to earth from astronauts, Kubrick was brought in to use the techniques he developed for 2001 and create images to package to the American public. I'll leave it at that and hopefully let you discovery more on your own. Here's a documentary, Dark Side of the Moon: Stanley Kubrick and the Fake Moon Landings, that goes into more depth about Kubrick's involvement with the lunar landing.

While I personally, without a shadow of a doubt, believe that the Apollo 11 astronauts completed their mission to the surface of the moon, I also find it highly likely that the images from that first trip were faked on a soundstage somewhere.

Funny that somehow wishing you a Happy Cinco de Mayo quickly escalated to faking the lunar landing. If you needed an excuse to drink today, please feel free to use this post.

May the Fourth Be With You.

2014-05-05T09:00:00.000-07:00

What a busy week for Star Wars fans. First we got word from Disney on changes to the EU. Next we were given the cast announcement for Episode VII. College Humor put out a video of Cantina Band auditions and finally we saw the trailer for Star Wars: Rebels that will be premiering on Disney XD this fall. Let's tackle each of these topics one at a time.

"A long time ago in a (ever expanding) galaxy far far away..."

Last week, Disney released this video which explains what the Expanded Universe is by having people who are trusted to bring new Star Wars stories to us today tell exceptional stories of how the EU effected them. A major component of Star Wars is that George Lucas allowed for a external narrative to take place in the form of books, comics, video games, etc. within the Star Wars universe which became a tremendous part of most fans lives, myself included. For those Star Wars fans, during the period between Return of the Jedi and The Phantom Menace, these stories thankfully bridged the gap and gave Star Wars fans something to do besides play with their action figures.

The video goes on to explain that this segment of the Star Wars universe is not considered canon but all future Disney projects (movies, television shows, book, video games, etc.) will be overseen by a creative team to streamlined stories and all EU projects will thus be considered canon. As far as I knew, previously the only things considered canon under Lucasfilm were the movies and the Clone Wars cartoon so this sounded great to me. To create new stories for films under the new Disney leadership, the storyline from book would have to be ignored or in this case erased from the timeline. Nothing surprising there at all. I was however surprised to start reading around online and see that the overall reaction was quiet the opposite.

Most posts I read led me to believe that Star Wars fans were going to be tortured by an IT-O Interrogator Droid to purge their memories of all stories within the EU but as far as I know this isn't happening nor do I think an IT-O Interrogator Droid is capable of even doing that. I can't honestly believe that fans had such delusions of grandeur that their favorite stories would be turned into the script for episodes VII, VIII and IX. No one in their right mind should think that Disney should be forced to use the Thrawn Trilogy or say the Courtship of Princess Leia as a back story or that the movies should take place within the New Jedi Order stories. That would be unfair and considering they paid $4 billion for the Star Wars property I'm glad they're creating their own story.

As for my story, in 1991 I was a ten year old Star Wars fanatic that had just recently fell in love with reading. It was during the 1990-91 school year that I truly became enthusiastic about books. My teacher introduced us to Roald Dahl through the books The BFG, The Witches, and of course Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. As a result, I would make my mother bring me to the Waldenbooks in the Newburgh Mall to purchase a new Dahl book every few weeks. I was amazed by the stories he told and went on to read close to 30 of his book by the fall of 1991. I was on one of those trips to Waldenbooks, most likely to pick up a new Dahl book that I was first introduced to the Expanded Universe.

I can remember that the Dahl book were located in the back right corner of the store next to the register but I never made it anywhere near them that day. Right front and center on the racks of new arrivals in the store entrance was a book with the forever recognizable Star Wars logo across the top.

Heir to the Empire was my first introduction into the Expanded Universe much like many other Star Wars fans from that time period. In the months that followed, I found devouring the Dark Empire comic series, future book releases, The Lucasfilm Fan Club Magazine starting with issue #18 for me, the Star Wars Trilogy SNES games, and all subsequent material to follow across all platforms.

There was a seven year stretch there where I was consumed by all things Star Wars. Luckily I was only tempted and did not give in to the power of the Darkside.

“I never doubted you! Wonderful!”

With each passing day it seems I'm feeling better and better about the upcoming sequels. While most of the names released as part of the cast for the upcoming Episode VII had been rumored, there were still a few names that caught me off guard. I was unaware that either Andy Serkis or Max von Sydow were being considered for roles. The Serkis casting means one thing, he will be portraying a character that will be created using CGI. Serkis is best know for his motion caption action and his portrayal of Gollum in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy. I'm intrigued to hear about what type of character he will be portray. An alien side kick? Some evil alien? Someone a la General Grievous or Darth Vader that is more machine then man? As for Max von Sydow, my hopes are to see him in a Sith or Jedi deserter role. While it is more probable that he will be portraying a senior military official.

As for fears, who the cast consisted of never truly concerned me. I was fearful as to how the screen time would break down.  Rumors continue to swirl that Harrison Ford will play a major part in the upcoming film which is great to hear. However I'm still scared that Luke, Leia and Han are going to be written out of the story or killed off early on. I can see them killing Luke at the end of Episode VII to mirror the death of Obi-Wan Kenobi in Episode IV. That makes sense. Abrams was successful mirroring the previous films in his reboot of the Star Trek franchise and I'm sure it would work just as well with Star Wars.

As for my ideal storyline that would fall in with what we know so far, I'd have Luke working to reestablish the Jedi Order, Leia working as a Senator or Supreme Chancellor in the New Republic, and Han sitting around yearning for the glory days of yesteryear. The Imperial Alliance still survives on the outer rim but is fading away. A distress signal reaches the capital through the Senate and Leia approaches Luke about sending Jedi to investigate. Han volunteers to transport the Young Jedi himself having previous experience with the planet and the system from his smuggling days. Of course Chewie is along for the ride. When they arrive on the Planet they are ambushed by Imperials that either have a new secret weapon or, even better, a new Sith leader. While most of the crew escapes a few were killed and one or two are feared to have been taken alive. Sensing the threat, (here's where JJ gets his movie mirror moment)  Luke travel to the outer rim to confront our new Sith but falls to him in front of our Young Jedi heroes. Perhaps while Han is away with the new Jedi Knights, you could have Luke revisit the message and spend his time searching through the remains of the old Jedi archives for information pertaining to the message in the distress signal.  Maybe it's that they are traveling to the home world of the Sith, maybe the name is of someone dating back to the time of Episodes I-III.

Regardless of how the storyline plays out, I would love to see Luke either searching for and finding or already possessing and viewing archived hologram data from the old Jedi Temple. How cool would it be to see Luke watch a recording of the Ewan McGregor/Obi-Wan Kenobi. While many people were unhappy with Episodes I-III, tying all the eventual 9 movies together would serve Abrams well.

Mos Eisley spaceport: You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. We must be cautious.

It appears Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes held auditions. Excuse me while I go dust off my Omnni Box.

You Rebel Scum!

So it is Star Wars Day and Disney released a one minute trailer of the upcoming Star Wars: Rebels show.

The Star Wars: Rebels series takes place in the time period between Episodes III and IV. With that being said, it was unclear what this series would consist of but I was relieved to see both a Jedi and a Sith featured during this clip. I hadn't followed the production of Rebels so I was uncertain if there would be any Jedi survivors included in the story.

I'm curious to see if R2-D2 or C-3PO are involved in the story at some point. This could end up being the first Star Wars film or television program not to feature R2-D2 and C-3PO outside of the two Ewok TV movies. I'm curious, with Disney's new EU, are the Ewok movies still considered canon?

THE SCIENCE OF SELLING YOURSELF SHORT

2014-04-26T09:00:00.003-07:00

Our story starts this past Thursday night. After two months of saying I need to see The Wolf of Wall Street, I finally decided to give the movie a watch. This is not a review of the movie however. This is more a story of how my experiences affected the way I view the movie. Also, while it’s not necessary, this will all probably make a lot more sense to someone who has seen The Wolf of Wall Street. Having seen Boiler Room is an added bonus.

For those of you who don’t know me, I worked as a stock broker for a brief period of my life. In the summer of 2007, I decided I should try to start a career at some point and began searching for potential jobs. While contemplating my future, the thought of being a stock broker finally manifested itself on a Sunday night. At 3 A.M. So I did what anyone else would do at 3 A.M. on a Sunday night, I began scouring Craigslist.

I was relieved to find three firms that posted "no experience necessary" and gladly emailed a copy of my resume to each and went to bed feeling better about myself. Then, much to my surprise, two of the offices called and left voice messages while I was sleeping to the butt-crack of noon.

I called and set up an interview with one of these two firms for the following day, which was Tuesday for those keeping track. This is still the most bizarre interview I’ve ever been on.

In general, every interview is a variation of the same story. The interviewer asks a series of questions to qualify you as a candidate. Why did you leave your last job? What are your strengths and weaknesses? Tell me about your responsibilities at your last job? You get the idea. You’re there to sell yourself. Here’s why you should choose me.

This interview was different however. The managing partner gave me a hard sell on why I should work there and why their firm is a better option than other firms on "The Street". I was told the background of the managing partners and how "what they learned at Lehman Brothers" would enable me to be successful at their firm. He follows that up with, “If you become an employee at this firm you will make your first million within three years.” What?!

I had seen Boiler Room in the theater and realized he was stealing his pitch straight from the movie. I didn't care. I was seeing dollar signs and ate that shit up. Just because he was quoting Ben Affleck didn't mean shit. I'm going to be filthy rich. I went to the interview hoping to find a job to potentially make $100k a year and buy a house.  The interview wasn't over and I'm going to be a multi-millionaire now. Man, was I fucking stupid.

For those who haven't seen Boiler Room it's basically The Wolf of Wall Street except told through the eyes of a low level employee at the firm who is played by Giovanni Ribisi. Definitely worth the watch and while we're on the subject of Boiler Room, I obviously took the job after the interview but that was not the only aspect of this job that echoed the movie. This office loved to refer to anyone possible as a "piker." For those unfamiliar with the term piker, a piker is a stingy or cautious person. So, the guy on the phone won't buy shares? He's a piker. You don't want to get drinks after work? You're a piker. Alex Rodriguez went 0-4 last night? He's a fucking piker. You get the idea. This office also had one rule. If you have seen Boiler Room I'm sure you've already guessed it, "Don't pitch the bitch."

Back to the interview. After 15 minutes of what, in hindsight, appears to have been a cocaine fueled sermon he finally asked his one and only question.

Can you sell me this pen?

Flash forward to Thursday night. I'm watching Leo work his magic and he says, "Sell me this pen."

Fuck me. I've spent the last seven years thinking, "What's the best way to sell a pen?" I've even prepped an answer in the event that I'm ever asked again. I've told the selling the pen story countless times and never once encountered anyone who had been asked to "sell the pen" at any point and now it's a major part of an Academy Award nominated picture. (I've since Google searched it and found that it is a common question during interviews for sales positions.)  While I was enjoying the movie, I was also someone bitter.

As I said, I was offered the job and took it. Everyday I'd commute the two hours, door to door, into work. I'd spend 12 hours per day on the phone being berated by secretaries all while making $300 every two weeks. But the money was coming so I stuck it out.

Flash forward to Friday morning. Having watched the movie the previous night, my experience working on Wall Street was just as fresh to me in my mind as the movie and so I found myself doing something I haven't done in years. I went online to read the "What's New" section of the Wall Street Journal.

Back when I was working on Wall Street, one of the first lessons I received was that if I looked over and read the "What's New" section I would learn all I needed for the day. For those unfamiliar with "What's New", it is basically a summary of the big news both in finance and worldwide for the day.

So this is where things got weird for me.  Back to Friday morning. The first bullet I read is about how Herbalife is being investigated by the FBI for fraud. So why is that weird? Well it's not on its own, so let us go back to 2007 to make it weird.

But first, some background. The firm I worked for was modeled after these firms that were shut down for illegal trading but weren't exactly performing illegal trades themselves. The model at the firm I worked for was to target stocks that were hopefully going to see a significant jump in price in a 2 to 4 month period and then they would sell all holdings for a profit. So where most large firms look to grow wealth over time and hold positions on certain stocks for years at a time, we were essential Churning accounts to generate commissions. For those unfamiliar Churning is the practice of executing a trade strictly to generate commission and it's against security law. By churning the account my firm would be able to charge their 4% commission 3 to 6 times a year as opposed to the one time at most large firms. But by being very particular about what type of investors they dealt with, they avoided accusations of account churning and having to forfeit commissions.  Quiet clever actually.

So. 2007. These 3 to 6 positions I mentioned were accompanied by an elaborate and comprehensive story written by the firms' analyst to sell investors on the stock. Now picture Leo on the phone in the movie talking up his tech company that was actually a garage. While these were well known companies we were selling the model was exactly the same. Give the customer thorough details about the company, ask for them to join you on a small purchase and then wait. Silence is awkward. When the excuse came, we had a Rolodex of rebuttals waiting to hit them with before getting back to the script. Repeat until they buy. You get the idea.

So the first of these scripts I got my hands on focused on a guy named Bill Ackman. Here's a synopsis of that script. Ackman was and is the CEO of a hedge fund, Pershing Square Capital Management. In 2005, Ackman and Pershing Square Capital acquired a large stake in Wendy's International (burger joint) and sold off their Tim Horton's doughnut chain thus giving the company an influx of cash and driving the stock price up, creating great profits for his hedge fund. Now he was targeting none other than the Target Corporation.

The script went on to explain that the Target Corporation had its own in house credit card for customers and all the land that Target stores were built on. So we would tell potential clients that Ackman was likely to spin those off much like he did with Tim Horton's to generate profit for his hedge fund. Ackman's going to make a ton of money on this deal, why shouldn't you?

So we're essentially dealing the definition of a corporate raider there and for those curious at home, Ackman didn't end up doing either of the two things we told clients he was likely to do.

So, since leaving Wall Street I've found myself still paying attention to the people and companies in these scripts such as Ackman.

Which brings us back to Friday. A refresher, Herbalife was now being investigated by the FBI for possible fraud. The reason why this is significant to my story is that Bill Ackman and Pershing Square Capital Management were selling short a position on Herbalife and very publically claimed that Herbalife is a Ponzi scheme. A short position or selling short is when someone sells stocks on the open market without actually owning the stock. Idea being that they believe the prize will drop drastically and they will be able to buy the stock at a lower price to fulfill the sale and make a profit.

So here I was several years later and those events were still impacting my life. Watching The Wolf of Wall Street brought me back to a time in my life that I had looked at as an epic failure. My own experiences forbade me from even enjoying a simple movie of similar subject matter. I was bitter. Bitter that my becoming a stock broker coincided with the 2007 stock market crash and that my life seemed to mirror and crash in similar fashion.

But in the subsequent days I've taken time to look back on how those experiences, that I've looked at as this monumental defeat, have influenced the decisions and choices I've made in life for the better.

The point being that with time and reflection even the lowest of moments will yield positive results from a certain point of view.

Turns out I was selling myself short because somehow through the experience I learned how to sell a pen.

Top 25 Donruss Diamond King Cards

2014-04-26T09:00:00.002-07:00

From 1982-1996 the Donruss baseball card company produced the Diamond Kings series. Each year, the series would feature a player who starred the previous season from each MLB team and Donruss relied on artist Dick Perez to captured the players' likenesses. After rummaging through my old baseball cards, I decided to formulate a list of my favorite Donruss Diamond Kings cards by using a combination of aesthetic value, player's performance, and most importantly, did the card make me laugh.

25. 1982 - Pete Rose:

What better place to start this list than with the first ever card in the Diamond Kings series and the all-time hits king. The series got off to a great start with "Charlie Hustle" as card #1 in the 1982 set.

24. 1985 - Alvin Davis:

After winning the A.L. Rookie of the year in 1984, Davis was featured in the 1985 set. Davis wins the award for "best smile" in the series. He clearly was a big fan of the Diamond Kings Series and couldn't hold back his feelings of joy and elation for being included.

23. 1986 - Dwight Gooden:

In 1986, Gooden was coming off a statistically dominant Cy Young Award winning season for the Mets. I particularly enjoy the single straight line in the background of this card. An unfortunate but simple foreshadowing of how Gooden's career flat-lined soon afterwards.

22. 1987 - Rick Rhoden:

Where to start with this card? How about the terrible stripped Pirates hats? Perhaps the mustache? How about the colorful specs of confetti sprinkled around him? Rhoden appears to be the guest of honor for a party in his name and he couldn't be happier.

21. 1987 - Jose Canseco:

This card falls under the category "Best of the Worst." Canseco comes off looking like a 5'2'' Italian guy named Sal in this depiction instead of being the imposing 6'4'' Cuban-American slugger. In a youth filled with collecting Jose Canseco baseball cards, I somehow never stumbled across this Diamond Kings card. Just to set the record straight, it was worth the wait.

20. 1986 - Willie McGee:

In 1985 Willie was the N.L. MVP. So fittingly he was featured as the Cardinals representative in Diamond Kings. For those who never saw McGee, this is a very accurate and well represented painting of him. McGee wasn't known for his movie star good looks, but he could definitely hit and was a major component of "Whiteyball" for the St. Louis Cardinals.

19. 1996 - Juan Gonzalez:

At first glance, this portrait appeared to be a simple and straightforward depiction of Juan Gon. On closer examination however, I noticed the subtle difference in color behind his ear and that his mullet was within view. Well played Mr. Perez. Well played.

18. 1996 - Larry Walker:

Without question, 1996 was a great year for mullets. Walker's mane was second to none in the mid-90s as you can tell from this card. I have to think they chose a side profile just to incorporate the full breadth of Walker's mullet. The pure volume and extent of this mullet can only be described as intense.

17. 1983 - Rollie Fingers:

Fingers appears deep in thought while looking to the distance. Perhaps contemplating the vastness of space and time or pondering over the human search for meaning. It's conceivable that Fingers was determining what do to with his free time knowing he would miss the entire 1983 season. More accurately though Fingers was giving his, famous waxed handle bar, mustache the best possible angle to achieve greatness on this card.

16. 1984 - Wade Boggs:

After his massive 1983 season, Boggs was selected as a Diamond King. The 1984 set was the one year from 1982-1993 that strayed away from the ribbon like template and used a design similar to MLB playoff bunting. The one thing I took away from the 1984 series, besides that, was that it was, without a doubt, the peak of the polyester pull over jersey in the MLB. In fact, I wish a couple teams would bring the look back full time today.

15. 1988 - Ivan Calderon:

What exactly is going on behind Calderon in this pic? Not sure if something exploded or if he's supposed to be on a bad drug trip. He does appear to be a bit uncomfortable. Much like the murder of Calderon, it appears this mystery will remain unsolved. On a more positive note though, the Diamond Kings from 1987-1990 featured some great background art, none better however than the radiating Ivan Calderon.

14. 1990 - Bo Jackson:

Jackson was a two sports star who was nothing short of a revolutionary athlete before flaming out due to injury. Luckily Bo left us with some amazing material, such as commercials, hand held games, and cartoons to forever remember him by. While it is debatable where Bo falls on the list of greatest athletes of all time, without any doubt Bo will forever be known as the greatest video game athlete of all time.

13. 1991 - Roger Clemens:

During my years of collecting baseball cards, the 1991 Diamond Kings collection was my favorite subset from any of the major card producers. This is the first of a few entries from the epic 1991 series. 1991 was the first year that Perez switched from the standard portrait model to include action shots into the series. The action shots used in the 1991 Diamond Kings set, such as this one of Roger Clemens, are the type of paintings you'd hope for when preserving the history of baseball.

12. 1988 - Andre Dawson:

Once again we have a player coming off of a MVP season looking absolutely ecstatic in his portrait. "The Hawk" had just escaped the career shortening AstroTurf of Olympic Stadium in Montreal and won the MVP during the 1987 season, his first with the Chicago Cubs. Dawson surprisingly is the third of four Hall of Famers on this list. That number will more than likely double in the upcoming years however.

11. 1990 - Dave Stewart:

There were few pitchers in baseball as good as Stewart in the late 80's and early 90's and by looking at the smirk on his face, he knew it all too well. Stewart put together four straight 20 plus win seasons from 1987 to 1990 for the Oakland Athletics, finishing in the top 4 of the Cy Young Award voting each year but failing to every win the award.

10. 1990 - Ken Griffey Jr:

From the outset of his career, Griffey Jr. was looked upon as the player who would pass Hank Aaron as the all-time Home Run King, that was until personal injuries and the use of steroids by a particular rival derailed that. There was no hotter baseball cards to collect during that time period than a Griffey Jr card. I purchased the entire1990 Diamond King series from a dealer simply because of the inclusion of this card.

9. 1982 - Gorman Thomas:

Thomas was a bit before my time with his last season, 1986, corresponding with the first season I can remember following baseball and also having this card of his. After looking over his career stats, I've drawn the conclusion that, at best, he was a poor man's Pat "the Bat" Burrell. Frequent strikeouts, low batting average, and an abundance of home runs are key components in reaching cult like status with MLB fan bases. No surprise why he was popular in Milwaukee.

8. 1991 - Rafael Palmeiro:

Palmeiro came off a solid campaign in 1990, but his career had not taking the step to the next level yet. I'd like to think that Palmeiro saw this card and said, "Look at the anticipation in my eyes. Look at the confidence I have to make the play." That was all it took. Palmeiro knew he had to do whatever it took going forward to become the player on this card no matter risk to body or reputation. The rest is history.

7. 1989 - Chris Sabo:

If we've learned anything throughout the history of baseball it is that solid play combined with a unique style or look will allow said player to amass a large following. As you can tell Sabo's goggles were 90 percent of his allure to fans. Dick Perez is no fool either. Clearly he decided to use visible rays of light that have refracted off of Sabo's goggles to create a mesmerizing background.

6. 1992 - Jeff Bagwell & Frank Thomas(Tied):

Two iconic players from the 1990's highlight the 1992 series. Bagwell and Thomas are forever linked for being born on the same day and now they can add this countdown to that bond they eternally share. You're welcome gentleman.

5. 1991 - Craig Biggio:

From 1982-1990 Perez experimented with different art styles throughout the individual series but in 1991 settled on the use of a solid color with fading for the background. The 91 series also included some of Perez's most profound and detailed works with none more exceptional than this portrait of Hall of Famer to be Craig Biggio.

4. 1993 - Ryne Sandberg:

In the 92 and 93 series, Perez continued the progression of the Diamond Kings by removing the border surrounding the cards. By making such a simple change the Diamond Kings series went from looking like a simple baseball card to a work of art worthy of accompanying a player such as Ryne Sandberg into the Hall of Fame.

3. 1994 - Don Mattingly:

Affectionately known as "the hitman", few players looked better at the plate and more prepared to bat than Donny Baseball. I've been a Yankee fan my entire life (I know I'm being a bit of a homer with this pick) and have had the privileged of witnessing five championship teams but there was never a moments when Yankee Stadium was rocking quite like this during those title runs. The image of Mattingly at the plate brings back fond memories of a youth gone by.

2. 1996 - Mark McGwire:

Throughout the 15 year series, no portrait captures a player essence better than this painting of Big Mac. A modern day Paul Bunyan, McGwire traded in the ax for a bat in this tall tale. 1996 started a four year tear where McGwire hit over 50 home runs each season and in 1998 set a then Major League Record of 70 home runs in a season. Like any other tall tale, it turned out elements of McGwire's exploits were exaggerated and loom large over his accomplishments.

1. 1994 - Dick Perez:

Taking the top spot is the master himself, Dick Perez. Previously Perez had been featured on checklists for the Diamond Kings series but in 1994 he added himself to the collection. This card is a fitting tribute to the man responsible for one the signature baseball card series throughout the 80s and 90s. Thank you Mr. Perez. Thank you.

I hope you enjoyed the countdown. Feel free to check out all of the cards in the Diamond Kings collection right here and continue your own trip down memory lane. Apologies to the 1995 set which was the only year that failed to be featured in the countdown. I suppose Perez is granted a one year hangover period after having included himself in the 1994 series.

The Jose Canseco Project

2014-04-26T09:00:00.001-07:00

February 21^st is and will forever be the day the "Jose Canseco Project" was set in motion. The “Jose Canseco Project” has had a widespread and lasting effect on the game of baseball and its namesake this blog. For those of you who have never heard this story before; this is the heartbreaking, tragic and unfortunate tale of the “Jose Canseco Project.”

The "Jose Canseco Project" was a secretive operation ran by Major League Baseball's commissioner’s office in the spring of 2002. After playing half a season for the Chicago White Sox in 2001, Canseco sat at 462 home runs, well within striking distance of 500 career home runs for a slugger of his stature. Even in the twilight of his career Canseco could have hung around long enough to hit 38 home runs. At the time, steroids were suspected by the public and writers but the reach and depths of usage had not become public knowledge yet. Fearful that someone who had so obviously use steroids would reach 500 career home runs, a statistic that all but guaranteed himself a place in the Hall of Fame, the commissioner’s office took unprecedented action.

In December of 2001, MLB baseball took over controlling interest of the Montreal Expos, coinciding with the sales of the Florida Marlins and the Boston Red Sox. This new controlling interest in one of its franchises allowed the commissioner’s office to alleviate an existing dilemma. On February 21, 2002, the 37 year old Canseco was signed by the Montreal Expos and brought to spring training to be there every day left fielder, thus the “Jose Canseco Project”was set in motion.

On March 27^th, just six days before the start of the season, the Expos inexplicably released Canseco. By being released that late into spring training, Canseco was left with nowhere to turn since all other MLB rosters had already been assembled and were preparing for the impending start of the regular season. The MLB commissioner’s office had successfully prevented Canseco from obtaining a spot on a MLB roster through its shrewd actions.

In a move that they thought and hoped would protected the integrity of the game, the commissioner’s office set the pieces in motion for the ultimate unveiling of its dirty little secret. In the spring of 2004, Canseco made one last-ditch effort to reach the Major Leagues while trying out for the Los Angeles Dodgers. After this last attempted failed, Canseco turned his back on the game that had ultimately betrayed him.

In 2005, Jose Canseco released a Tell-All book entitled, Juiced: Wild Times, Rampant ‘Roids, Smash Hits, and How Baseball Got Big. The book became a “tipping point” in the public knowledge and discussion of performing enhancing drugs in Major League Baseball and throughout the sports world. The book provided answers and generated many more questions pertaining to the “Steroid Era” in Major League Baseball. By avoiding the undeniable truth and concerning themselves with statistics, the commissioner’s office put off the underlying problem and left the game with a bigger black eye than need be.

The fear that Canseco would bring steroid use to the forefront became a self-fulfilling prophecy for Major League Baseball. By blackballing Canseco, the commissioner’s office gave him the motivation and the fire within to write a book that would tarnish his own legacy but more importantly reveal the truth about the game of baseball.

Weekend at Vader's

2014-04-26T09:00:00.000-07:00

The other night I happened to stumble across the movie Mannequin while watching television. I could go on professing the greatness that is Mannequin but there was one thing that stood out to me during this viewing. Mannequin and Toy Story 3 are essentially the same movie. In essence you have inanimate objects coming to life and avoiding the same near death by way of a trash compactor.
My next thought after this was, “Holy shit isn’t the guy who wrote Toy Story 3 writing Star Wars Episode VI?” Yes, Michael Arndt will be penning the screenplay for the next Star Wars installment. So if he essential wrote a remake of Mannequin and turned it into an Oscar winning screenplay, what is he going to do with Episode VII?

I’ll admit, this thought has repeatedly elicited one thought on the future of the Star Wars franchise. I have a bad feeling about this. Well maybe not the entire franchise, just the stories of Episodes 7, 8, and 9. I’m much more excited for the potential of Star Wars expanded universe films at this point.
But that’s enough about me and my fears. Let’s get back to Michael Arndt. Since he was willing to take his climactic moment in Toy Story 3 from an Andrew McCarthy movie perhaps he will be inclined to do the same with Episode VII?

He could have Episode VII picks up with a crumbling Imperial Empire’s leadership retreated to one of their last strongholds of control, say the capital planet of Coruscant. Enter a meeting of Imperial Officer set to determine a proper course to regain control of the Universe. After said meeting, two young officers devise a plan of action to bring the Imperial Alliance back to its glory days and put themselves in a position of power. They decide that the key to regaining and keeping control is installing a leader that instills fear, much like Darth Vader and the Emperor did.

After much though and conversation, they realize that no one within the Imperial leadership could fill such a void. If they couldn’t find someone to replace Lord Vader, perhaps they could just bring Lord Vader back from the dead. Jackpot. There is your compelling story. Episode VII just became Weekend at Bernie’s.

Imagine three movies of these two young Imperial Officers reestablishing the Imperial Empire just by carrying around an empty Darth Vader suit. The parallel story line could follow Luke, Leia, and Han hearing the persistent rumors of the return of Darth Vader and there battles with a rejuvenated Imperial Empire.

Obi Wan Kenobi famously said, “You can’t win, Darth. If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine.” Perhaps instead it will be Darth Vader who becomes more powerful after death. After all, Star Wars is the story of Anikan Skywalker. It wouldn’t be right making the last three stories about anyone else.

2014 Jordan Brand Classic

2014-04-21T09:00:00.001-07:00

The Jordan Brand Classic is a All Star basketball game that features some of the top high school talent in the country. In previous years, current NBA stars such as Lebron James, Kevin Durant, Carmelo Anthony, Chris Paul, and Blake Griffin have participated in the game. On Thursday I stopped by practice for the Jordan Brand Classic at Basketball City and then attended the game on Friday at the Barclays Center to get a look. I was curious and hopeful to see if any of the players stood out when surrounded by similarly talented players. I wasn't disappointed. Certain players showed a more refined skill level and a level of aggressiveness to stand out amongst their peers. Based on what I saw, here are five players to keep an eye on next year in the college game and down the road in the NBA.

JAHLIL OKAFOR - DUKE - C - 6-11 260lb - Okafor is regarded as the top player in this years class and it was easy to notice why during practice and the game.  Okafor dominated the ball in the post both days. Okafor also showed great foot work for a high school big man and won the MVP award for the winning East team. Body shape and skill wise, Okafor reminded me of Al Jefferson of the Charlotte Bobcats.  Okafor should average 20-10 for Duke next year and will be in the discussion for Player of the Year honors.

KELLY OUBRE - KANSAS - WF - 6-7 210lb - Coach Self found a nice replacement in Oubre for Andrew Wiggins at Kansas. Oubre showed a combination of shooting range and athleticism in practice but it was a moment in Friday's game that impressed me most. After a 3 on 1 break along side two Duke recruits (Okafor and Tyus Jones), Oubre pulled Jones aside after the pass went to Okafor just to say some of us other guys would like the ball as well (Okafor had dominated the ball up to that point for the East).  Leadership like that will bode well of Oubre going forward.

EMMANUEL MUDIAY - SMU - PG - 6-4 195lb - From what I saw, Mudiay was getting to the rim with ease and showed he had enough strength to still finish when there was contact. Watching Mudiay on both days reminded me of another slashing guard who thrived at getting to the rim and who also happened to attend a college you wouldn't consider a power house.  That player was Dwayne Wade.  I'm looking forward to seeing Larry Brown coach Mudiay next season.

CLIFF ALEXANDER - KANSAS - C - 6-9 260lb - The other MVP from Friday night's game was Alexander (The Jordan Brand Classic names a MVP from both teams). Alexander matched Okafor basket for basket during Friday's game where they squared off against each other. Alexander's build and strength should allow for him to dominate at Kansas next season and with the NBA going with smaller quicker line ups his 6-9 height shouldn't hinder his pro potential. Kansas might have the top 2 picks in this years NBA Draft and have an even better season next year. Unreal.

STANLEY JOHNSON - ARIZONA - WG - 6-6 225lb - Mudiay was the player I was looking forward to watching the most but it ended up being Johnson who impressed the most.  The Arizona recruit has the most NBA ready body amongst the guards/wing players and showed off superb athleticism. The other four players on this list are considered by many to be the top four NBA Draft prospects for the 2015 draft so I wasn't surprised to see them stand out.  Don't be surprised if Johnson joins those 4 in the Top 5 and potentially even passes some.

*BONUS* MYLES TURNER - UNDECIDED - C - 7-0 240lbs - Turner did not participate in practice or the game due to a sprained ankle so I didn't get to see him play up close. However I did get to see him shoot around. Turner showed excellent range and touch for a 7 footer. Based on his build and height, the player you'd hope he'd look to model his game after is Kevin Garnett. Turner plans on announcing where he plans to attend college on April 30th.

2014 NBA PLAYOFFS

2014-04-21T09:00:00.000-07:00

Round 1

EAST
INDIANA PACERS vs ATLANTA HAWKS: The top seeded Pacers limp into the playoffs having finished the last 2 months of the season with a record below .500. The only saving grace is that the Hawks may be the only team in the playoffs to struggle more down the stretch. PREDICTION: PACERS IN SIX.

MIAMI HEAT vs CHARLOTTE BOBCATS: The two time defending champs are health and in great shape to become the first team since the 1998 Chicago Bulls to three-peat. LeBron and the Heat have the experience and know how to close out teams quickly to keep themselves fresh going forward. The future of the Charlotte Hornets is looking good though. PREDICTION: HEAT IN FOUR.

TORONTO RAPTORS vs BROOKLYN NETS: The Nets put this team together to compete with the Miami Heat come playoff time. With the playoffs here, we'll find out if the acquisitions of Paul Pierce and Kevin Garnett were worth it. While the Raptors have been a feel good story all season, this is Pierce's time of the year. PREDICTION: NETS IN FIVE.

CHICAGO BULLS vs WASHINGTON WIZARDS: The Wizards match up very well against the Bulls here. Having Nene and Gortat inside should neutralize the advantage Chicago has in most match ups in the paint and the Wizards have a sizable advantage in the backcourt with John Wall and Brandon Beal. PREDICTION: WIZARDS IN SIX.

WEST
SAN ANTONIO SPURS vs DALLAS MAVERICKS: Coach Popovich and the Spurs find themselves in a position they've grown accustomed to as the top seed in the Western Conference and facing a familiar foe in Dirk Nowitzki and the Mavericks. Luckily for the Spurs, Dirk doesn't have same fire power along side of him as in previous years. PREDICTION: SPURS IN FIVE.

OKLAHOMA CITY THUNDER vs MEMPHIS GRIZZLIES: Kevin Durant took his game to the next level this season and will likely win his first MVP Award as a result. Anything short of a trip to the finals has to be viewed as a failure for this team. PREDICTION: THUNDER IN FIVE.

LOS ANGELES CLIPPERS vs GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS: PREDICTION: CLIPPERS IN SEVEN. (We're all going to hear way too much about this series so I'll refrain from bombarding you with more here.)

HOUSTON ROCKETS vs PORTLAND TRAILBLAZERS: While the Clippers-Warriors series will get the most attention, this will be the best series in the opening round. PREDICTION: ROCKETS IN SEVEN.

Round 2

EAST
INDIANA PACERS vs WASHINGTON WIZARDS: Indiana's late season struggles will finally catch up to them here and John Wall will be the break out star of this years playoffs. PREDICTION: WIZARDS IN SIX.

MIAMI HEAT vs BROOKLYN NETS: One final battle between LeBron and Pierce. I only wish the Nets didn't tank down the stretch and finish with the sixth seed so that this could have been the Eastern Conference Final. PREDITION: HEAT IN SEVEN.

WEST
SAN ANTONIO SPURS vs HOUSTON ROCKETS: Houston swept the regular season match ups 4-0. With that being said, there's no better coach in all of professional sports at adjusting for match ups than coach Popovich. I'm conflicted. PREDICTION: HOUSTON IN SIX.

OKLAHOMA CITY THUNDER vs LOS ANGELES CLIPPERS: At some point the Clipper's poor free throw shooting is going to catch up to them in the playoff. PREDICTION: THUNDER IN SIX.

Conference Finals

EAST
MIAMI HEAT vs WASHINTON WIZARDS: Welcome to the grand stage of the Eastern Conference Finals Wizards. Have you met the 2 time defending champs? Awestruck are we? PREDICTION HEAT IN FIVE.

WEST
OKLAHOMA CITY THUNDER vs HOUSTON ROCKETS: We'll have an entire series worth of "What if OKC didn't trade Harden away?". They won't regret it in this round. But in the finals? Well that's a different story. PREDICTION: THUNDER IN SIX.

NBA Finals

MIAMI HEAT vs OKLAHOMA CITY THUNDER: The Heat came awfully close to losing in the finals last year and somehow still pulled it out. I expect seven games that come down to the final few minutes of play. PREDICTION: HEAT IN SEVEN.

STRAIGHT TO VIDEO

2014-04-16T09:00:00.000-07:00

Is there a better and/or quicker way to fill a blog post then by using fun videos?

We'll start this of with the future host of the Late Show on CBS. Truth be told, I was a big fan of the Letterman show back when I was in high school but haven't watched the show in years. I get the feeling that after Dave saw he would never win the ratings war with Leno he decided at the least he'd outlast him. No real surprise that within weeks of Leno going off the air Dave announced he'd be walking away.

As for the future, CBS got the right guy. Stephen Colbert's satire is as good as it gets and he's quick witted in his interviews. I can't wait to see him get his hands on the Late Show. Here is Colbert acting out the results of a nuclear explosion.

Turns out Jeff Francoeur is still playing baseball albeit the Minor League variety. Recently, his teammates decided to pull a little prank on him. Kudos to whoever came up with the name for this video. It's called "On Jeff Ears".

The combination of this video and the background music is brilliant. The only other thing I'll say is watching this was the hardest I've laughed in weeks. Enjoy.

Synyster Gates is the lead guitarist for the band Avenged Sevenfold and this guy shreds tasty licks. Mr. Gates performed this original solo during a master class recently and my mind is blown. I own his signature model, which he is playing here, and it always sounds this good even when I'm playing it.

I know it's still over a month away from release but 20th Century Fox just released a new trailer for X-Men: Days of Future Past so I had to include it here. For those of you who don't care about comic books or comic based movies, you can go about your business. Move along. Move along.

You're still here. Good. Good. I've been reading X-Men comics since the late 1980s, so when word got out that they were making a movie based on the Days of Future Past storyline I got a little excited. With that being said, I will definitely be in line to see this opening night. Let me add that I was delighted to hear that they will follow this one up with X-Men: Apocalypse.

I'm sure at some point I'll write more in depth about what stories Marvel and D.C. should consider covering in their respective films going forward. For now though, D.C.'s new Justice League franchise should see films with Darkseid followed by The Crime Syndicate via Earth 3. For Marvel, we already know Avengers 2 and 3 will be Age of Ultron and The Infinity Gauntlet respectively. Either a film based on the Kree/Skrull War or introducing Kang would be suitable follow ups. For now though, let's enjoy the fact that we finally have Sentinels on film.

"The ball is tipped and there you are..."

I know the NCAA Basketball Tournament concluded nine days ago but I had to put this up for a variety of reasons. First off, One Shining Moment has always been significant to me. I grew up watching the tournament every year and wanting to be a part of the montage when I became a college basketball ball legend. So much for that. At the time, I had a VHS tape with all the One Shining Moment's on it from the 1990s that I would watch every year come tournament time. The NCAA Basketball Tournament is the greatest event in all of sports and having it conclude every year with this song and video montage is unrivaled. However, I do miss the Teddy Pendergrass version of this song.

Secondly, I will be attending practice for the Jordan Brand Classic on Thursday where I will see a group of the top high school seniors who will undoubtedly leave their mark on the college game next year. The list of past MVPs from this game is absolutely ridiculous. It includes Lebron James, Kevin Durant, Dwight Howard, Anthony Davis, Kyrie Irving, Amare Stoudemire, Brandon Jennings, Tyreke Evans, Tyler Hansbrough, Harrison Barnes, Jabari Parker, and Julius Randle (most years they've named an MVP from each team).

Duke has four signees playing in this game, the most of any school so far (still a few uncommitted players), including 2 of the top 4 players ranked by ESPN. I'll be curious to see if any players end up standing out during practice in such a talented group.

Since I told you my plans for Thursday why not Friday? Friday I will be at the Metropolitan Museum of Art where I'll spend the day sketching some of the paintings and sculptures that are on display. If all things go according to plan, I'll post some side by side pictures of my work and the master pieces that inspired them next week.

In honor of that, here is a video of two French street artists putting together quite an amazing mural.

Let's finish this up with a fun little video that tells us the difference between Porn Sex vs. Real Sex. Oh and they explain it using food.

BACK IN THE NEW YORK GROOVE.

2014-04-13T09:00:00.000-07:00

On Saturday, the temperature was in the 70s and spring made its long awaited return to New York City. What better way to usher in the change of seasons than strolling around the city listening to Ace Frehley’s version of New York Groove? With that in mind, I spent my Saturday (along with what seemed like every other New Yorker) roaming through NYC’s parks, from Union Square to Washington Square then up the Highline to Herald Square and finally ending up in Bryant Park to finish my odyssey, all the while listening to KISS’s greatest hits.

For those of you who may read this within weeks of me posting this, you may be thinking “Oh, KISS went into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame that weekend so he had KISS on the mind.” Not quite.

The fact that KISS went into the Hall of Fame this weekend in Brooklyn or that they didn’t perform is of little concern to me. Congrats to Paul, Gene, Peter, and Ace but I’d be more interested in watching video of The KISS Demon, of WCW fame, squaring off vs. Vampiro at this point. Check that. Perhaps infamy is a more fitting description of the Demon there. But that’s a different story.

Back to the point. I regard myself as a bit of a music connoisseur and with that being said there is no better song about NYC than Frehley’s version of New York Groove. You can have Sinatra. You can have Jay-Z and Alicia Keys. I’m taking Frehley. Listening to New York Groove set the mode for an excellent afternoon in the city. Hearing I Stole Your Love and Shout It Out Loud didn't hurt either.

Actually, one more side tangent here. While I was familiar with KISS (Who isn’t really?), I wasn’t truly exposed to their work or had any real desire to listen until I read Chuck Klosterman’s Fargo Rock City. In the book, Chuck explains that in 1978 KISS decided to release 4 solo albums (one for each member of the band) with the mindset that “If we sell 5 million records when we release one album, we’ll sell 20 million records if we release four at the same time!!!” Absolutely brilliant. We’ll Frehley’s version of New York Groove comes off of his album from this group which was also the most successful of the four.

The story of KISS’s 1978 experiment and their album sales expectations always makes me think about Eddie Murphy. Yep, the king of comedy during the 1980’s had the same thought process. At some point Eddie pondered, “If they pay me $10 million to play one character in a movie they’ll probably pay me $50 million if I play five plus characters.” Well, Disney paid and the world got the Klumps. Good for Eddie though. It’s somewhat frightening for me to think that Bowfinger was last non-Shrek movie of Eddie’s that I’ve seen and that was 15 years ago at this point. Unreal. Thankfully imdb just informed me that Beverly Hills Cop 4 is in the works. Now only if we could get a HBO stand up special to go along with that. I know, I'm being greedy and rambling at the same time.

OK, finally back to why I’m writing this. I've been meaning to put together a web page to function as a journal/blog and also to have one central location to keep anything I write for other sites. Walking around Saturday was the kick I needed to set this in motion. It's time to take some action.

The goal as of now is to post on here daily, whether as a diary of what’s going on in my life or just random musings and thoughts as a way of getting back into the habit of writing daily again. I’m sure there will be plenty on here pertaining to baseball, pro wrestling, Star Wars, comic books, living in NYC, and all the other things I take joy out of in life. Those who read these posts will hopefully gain a bit of insight while also being amused. Well, if anyone reads this.

2014 Royal Rumble Running Diary

2014-01-27T09:00:00.000-08:00

Welcome the 3^rd Annual Royal Rumble Running Diary. The Royal Rumble is one of WWE’s four preeminent pay per view events (the others being WrestleMania, Summer Slam, and Survivor Series) throughout the year. This also officially kicks of the road to WrestleMania, the WWE’s Super Bowl like event. For those unfamiliar, the Royal Rumble is named for its main event match which pits 30 combatants against each other in an over the top rope battle royal. It starts with two wrestlers in the ring with another being added to the mix every 90 seconds. To be eliminated, a wrestler must be thrown over the top rope and hit both feet to the floor. The last man remaining goes on to compete for the WWE World Heavy Weight Championship at WrestleMania.

This year’s event will showcase five matches:

The 30-Superstar Royal Rumble Match

WWE World Heavyweight Champion Randy Orton vs. John Cena

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt

WWE Tag Team Champions Cody Rhodes & Goldust vs The New Age Outlaws

7:54:05 PM - Welcome to the 2014 Royal Rumble!!!!! Our announcers tonight, as per usual, are Michael Cole, Jerry “The King” Lawler, and JBL.

7:54:31 PM - The first match is already over, turns out the WWE Tag Team Title Match was a preshow event. Oh, You Didn’t Know?! Yeah I forgot it was a preshow match up. Oh well. We have new Tag Team Champs. The Road Dog Jesse James. The Bad Ass Billy Gunn. The New Tag Team Champions. Yep, you read that right. The New Age Outlaws are Tag Team Champs for the first time since 1999. I’m all but certain tomorrow night on Monday Night Raw we will hear news now that The New Age Outlaws will be inducted into the Hall of Fame this year as a part of DX. I hope so. If that is the case, it would only be fitting to induct the nWo as well this year.

7:59:39 PM – WWE put together an expert panel of past winners to give opinions and feedback on tonight’s events. This panel consists of Hacksaw Jim Dugan, The "Heart Break Kid" Shawn Michaels, and The Nature Boy Ric Flair. Wooooooooooo. We just got the expert panel’s opinion of who will win tonight’s Royal Rumble.

Hacksaw – Dolph Ziggler (so I guess that answers whether or not Ziggler will be participating tonight)

HBK – The Shield (always good to hedge your bets when you can have 3 possible winners with one pick)

Ric Flair – Batista (The Animal returns and is the heavy favorite to win tonight)

8:06:08 PM - Time for Daniel Bryan vs. Bray Wyatt. This match is brought to you by Duck Dynasty and Appalachian Outlaws.

8:08:40 PM – The over/under of YES chants has been set at 324 1/2. I’ll take the over.

8:11:06 PM – Wyatt’s goons, Luke Harper and Erick Rowan, have been ordered to leave ringside. In past weeks the Wyatt family has used the 3 on 1 attack to their advantage. I had anticipated WWE using the usual 3 on 1 storyline in this match as well. So much for that. The good news is we may finally get to see what Bray Wyatt is capable of in the ring.

8:20:19 PM – 15 minutes in, this match has been dominated by Bray Wyatt. It’s time for the pace to pick up with some back and forth action and for this match to end.

8:23:32 PM – Daniel Bryan is either suffering from an early onset of Parkinson’s or is channeling his inner Hulk Hogan. He’s got the shakes.

8:26:46 PM – After a slow start, the typical hyper pace of a Daniel Bryan match is taking over.

8:30:42 PM – 1. 2. 3. Bray Wyatt is your winner. Great start to tonight’s action. Great start to Bray Wyatt’s career in single’s competition. I’m curious to see what WWE does with the Wyatt family after the storyline with Daniel Bryan. Does this conclude it? Who’s next? Maybe we’ll find out later tonight.

8:32:39 PM – We’re moments away from Brock Lesnar vs. Bigshow. My guess is this match is here simply to set up Lesnar vs. either Orton or Cena at the next PPV. Lesnar has already proclaimed that he is the number one contender going forward. No better way to make that official then having him dominate the world’s largest athlete.

8:34:44 PM – Big Ben sighting ring side. Nice constellation prize for not playing in either the Super Bowl or the Pro Bowl.

8:39:28 PM – Michael Cole gives us this, “It’s amazing how the atmosphere changes when Brock Lesnar enters the arena.” Ahhh yeah. That’s because every WWE fan watches petrified that Brock will snap and actually break someone in half.

8:40:47 PM – Lesnar has already dismantled Bigshow and the bell hasn’t even rang yet. Sick. Repeated chair shots from Lesnar have Bigshow down and hurting.

8:44:23 PM – The bell finally rings and we have a KO punch from Bigshow. Lesnar was going in for a kill shot with the steal chair only to take a right hand to the chin from Bigshow. Both wrestlers are down and out and we're 30 seconds into the match.

8:45:25 PM – Oh shit. We just had an F-5 from Brock and the match is over. That’s about as good of a 5 minute match as you can have.

8:47:06 PM – It appears we may not be done here.

8:47:18 PM – Brock is back in the ring using a chair on Bigshow again. This is followed by another 10 plus shots to Bigshow outside the ring now.

8:49:22 PM – Brock is now onto his 3^rd chair having already broke 2 chairs over Bigshow’s back. The message has been sent. Brock Lesnar means business.

8:50:40 PM – So we actually had 1 minute of match and 8 minutes of beating by chair. Excellent ratio.

8:52:17 PM – I would have loved to have been there when they pitched this match to Bigshow. “So we’re going to have you fight Brock Lesnar at Royal Rumble. That sounds great. What do you think about having Brock beat you senseless with a chair for 10 minutes? That work for you? Are we positive he knows this isn’t real? No, but you’re the only one we feel confident that may survive such an attack. Fair enough. Book it.”

8:54:10 PM – While we have a free moment I’ll put my Royal Rumble final 4 predictions out there. CM Punk. Roman Reigns. Big E Langston. And your winner….The Animal Batista. I’m not certain on the Big E Langston spot but I’d parlay the shit out of a bet for the other three being there at the end of the night.

8:57:17 PM – Orton vs. Cena coming up. I’m curious to see how Orton escapes with the title tonight. This is a match we’ve seen repeatedly during the past 10 years or so which makes it difficult to put a new wrinkle in to keep it original. I’m confident they’ll find a way to make this match work yet again.

9:07:13 PM – Both men are in the ring. During introductions mostly boo’s for both Cena and Orton. As the bell rings the crowd is chanting Daniel Bryan. Thank you Pittsburgh but he's not wrestling.

9:09:35 PM – Let’s go Cena!/Cena sucks!

9:10:24 PM - JBL acknowledges the crowds chants for Daniel Bryan and points out that we’re in Pittsburgh and the fans may not realize he wrestled in our first match. It’s truly isn’t a WWE event without someone insulting the intelligence of the city the show is in.

9:12:41 PM – We’ve had chants now for Daniel Bryan, CM Punk, Macho Man Randy Savage, and the Undertaker during this match. Now the crowd serenades them with chants of “BORING!!”

9:15:19 PM – Great move by Orton. He’s yelling at the crowd letting them know that they should be chanting his name. Not Daniel Bryan. Not John Cena. Me baby. Me.

9:20:23 PM – Side rant, I understand the Pittsburgh fans wishing to see either Daniel Bryan or CM Punk in this match. Chant for your guy the first 30 seconds before that match starts but then pick a side. You’re at the Royal Rumble. You’re reactions set the tone for everyone else viewing at home. Cheer for one of the two competitors and deal with it. That is all.

9:23:12 PM – The Ref was just knocked out. While the ref was out for the count, Cena put Orton in the STFU (his submission move) and Orton tapped out. Thinking he’d won the match, Cena released Orton from the hold only to turn and find the referee out cold. Classic WWE.

9:24:32 PM – The crowd just chanted “This is awful!!” Relax Pittsburgh.

9:25:35 PM – Jerry “The King” Lawler just acknowledge the crowd chants by saying that he thinks they’re trying to get into the head of Randy Orton to help John Cena. Valiant effort by the King.

9:27:02 PM – Orton just used both of Cena’s finishing moves (the STFU and the FU) on Cena. I wish they used this angle more often. And with that being said Cena just RKO’d Orton. Congrats Pittsburgh, you’re missing a very good match. You’ve all but guaranteed your city will never see another WWE PPV again. Mission Accomplished.

9:29:42 PM – The Wyatt’s just came out to ringside and distracted John Cena long enough for Randy Orton to RKO Cena and win the match. Nice twist. Looks like Orton went out and got his own muscle to get his back. This also looks like the Wyatt/Bryan storyline is done with Cena being their new target. Not what I anticipated but I like it.

9:32:27 PM – Very good undercard action tonight. I’m happy. Pittsburgh, are you happy? Guess not…

9:36:26 PM – While we wait for the Royal Rumble match, let’s take a moment to contemplate the coming arrival of the WWE Network. After years of trying to pedal DVDs to its fans, the WWE has finally found its perfect platform, its own network. The brain trust at WWE did an amazing job by including PPVs, past and current, as part of the package. For whatever reason, most professional sporting leagues have been hesitant to show all their programing on TV for free or a relatively low cost. Who’d have thought that by showing all of your events on TV, you build a larger fan base and in turn sell more merchandise and tickets to said events? And after selling more merchandise and tickets you can then MORE IMPORTANTLY charge advertisers more.

9:42:49 PM – It’s time for the Royal Rumble Match!!!!

9:43:01 PM – We learned on Raw this week that CM Punk will be entry number 1, who will be number 2?

9:43:43 PM - #1 CM Punk. Best In The World!!!

9:45:10 PM - #2 Seth Rollins. Our first of 3 members from The Shield enters the ring. Good choice by WWE to start us off.

9:47:41 PM - #3 Damien Sandow. We just had our first of 28 countdowns tonight. Nothing more exciting in the WWE universe than the anticipation of hearing who’s music is about to kick on as the crowd countdowns 5, 4, 3 2, 1!!!!

9:49:16 PM - #4 Cody Rhodes.

9:50:06 PM – Sandow is our first elimination of the night by the hands of CM Punk.

9:50:45 PM - #5 Kane. No mask. No Big Red Machine. He’s Corporate Kane tonight.

9:52:00 PM – Goodbye Kane. That’s the second elimination for CM Punk for those keeping score at home.

9:52:24 PM – #6 Alexander Rusev. This is our token NXT entry for tonight’s event. For those who don’t know, NXT is WWE equivalent of a minor league system. He’s thrown two people over the top rope only to have them hold on and avoid elimination. Rookie mistake.

9:53:57 PM - #7 Jack Swagger. The All-American American squares off against the Bulgarian from NXT to chants of USA USA USA!!! You can always count on the Rumble to have at the least three showdowns in ring that lead storylines going forward. Is this the first?

9:55:24 PM - #8 Kofi Kingston. Let’s see what absurd way Kingston avoids elimination this year. In years past Kingston has pogoed on JBL’s chair back to the ring and also walked on his hands outside the ring. Kingston was genetically created in a lab and bred for this event.

9:56:48 PM - #9 Jimmy Uso. Seven wrestlers in the ring for those keeping score at home. About time for the NXT guy to go.

9:58:19 PM - #10 Goldust. A Shattered Dreams Production. Which Rhode’s brother is going to eliminate the other tonight? You know that is happening.

9:59:24 PM – Rusev is out. While standing around Kofi was knocked out and into Rusev’s arms outside the ring. Rusef placed Kofi on the side barrier and he jumped several feet back to the ring. He did it again. I can see it now, a WWE DVD (check that a documentary on the new WWE Network) showing Kofi Kingston’s greatest Royal Rumble moments.

10:00:55 PM - #11 Dean Ambrose. The second member of the Shield to join tonight’s action.

10:02:15 PM - #12 Dolph Ziggler. I have a feeling Ziggler’s stay may be short but he is going to make an epic exit.

10:03:24 PM – The ring is getting crowded. The good news is that it’s filled with guys who actually wrestle. The main benefit of the NXT has been the added depth to the roster.

10:03:52 PM - #13 R-Truth. No rapping tonight? No time to rap. R-Truth means business. He sprinted into the ring and like that he’s gone. He should have given us at least one WHAT’S UP!

10:04:52 PM – Jimmy Uso. He gone.

10:05:31 PM – Another great move from Kofi. He latched his feet to the bottom rope to keep from falling to the floor. While dangling, he pulled off Jack Swagger’s shoe and used it against Swagger to keep from being eliminated. I know I'm being repetitive but once again, he was made for this match.

10:05:48 PM - #14 Kevin Nash. Big Sexy. The New World Order. So far we’ve had The New Age Outlaws and Kevin Nash. Is there any question as to whether HHH is calling the shots at WWE?

10:06:13 PM – Nash eliminates Swagger. Now we get an nWo/Shield stare down. Too sweet. Get Scott Hall out here. Big Sexy needs some back up.

10:07:18 PM - #15 Roman Reigns. Wow. Reigns just tossed Kofi and Ziggler like rag dolls. I told you Ziggler was going out in epic fashion. Kevin Nash gets low bridged and tumbles over the top rope as well.

10:08:59 PM - #16 The Great Khali. The Punjabi Playboy.

10:09:52 PM – This is now The Shields show. All three members in there, working together, just eliminated Khali.

10:10:37 PM – Goldust just tossed his brother Cody Rhodes only to be shown the door moments later by Reigns. I guess we’ll be seeing the brothers square off at WrestleMania this year now that they’ve lost the tag titles.

10:10:41 PM - #17 Sheamus. Are token “returning from injury guy” gets a warm welcomed back. Sheamus has busted the skulls of all three members of The Shield but, to no one’s surprise, was unable to eliminate any of the three.

10:12:17 PM - #18 The Miz. We’ve had 18 wrestlers enter the ring, so far so good.

10:13:45 PM - #19 Fandango. They’re Fandango’ing in Pittsburgh. We have seven men in the ring for those scoring at home.

10:15:13 PM - #20 El Torito. El Torito is a midget dressed in a bull costume. You read that correctly.

10:16:53 PM – El Torito just eliminated Fandango only to be eliminated by Roman Reigns moments later. That’s six eliminations for Reigns so far. Since the announcers keep pointing out Reigns’ elimination total, I’m guessing this total is going to get pretty high before all is said and done tonight.

10:17:29 PM - #21 Antonio Cesaro. The other half of the Real American’s is in the ring. Rollins gets to feel the effects of the Cesaro swing.

10:19:00 PM - #22 Luke Harper.

10:20:30 PM - #23 Jey Uso.

10:22:12 PM - #24 JBL. JBL enters the ring in full suit and tie. "Suit up!" He takes his jacket off, first mistake, and Reigns throws him out.

10:23:41 PM - #25 Erick Rowan. The Miz was just eliminated by Luke Harper after being tossed around by Rowan first. Rowan follows by eliminated Jey Uso. Tonight has been a showcase of the Wyatts and the Shield.

10:25:24 PM - #26 Ryback. The crowd chants Goldberg. Enough said.

10:26:53 PM - #27 Alberto Del Rio. Or for those of you who don’t speak Spanish, Albert of the River.

10:27:41 PM – Three entries to go. Cole informs the audience that Punk and Rollins have been in the ring for 42 minutes.

10:28:16 PM - #28 Batista. The Animal is back.

10:28:42 PM – He eliminates Erick Rowan and now a showdown with Ryback. Goodbye Ryback. Those two are closely followed by the elimination of Del Rio. That's three eliminates quickly by Bautista to validate his presence not only here tonight but as your WrestleMania headliner.

10:30:17 PM - #29 Big E Langston.

10:31:19 PM – The YES chants are starting already. Will #30 be Bryan? Of course not. If anyone in Pittsburgh paid attentions to the promos they’ve shown in the arena and at home tonight they’d already know who #30 was going to be.

10:31:42 PM - #30 Rey Mysterio. Poor Rey. He’s getting booed because he’s not Daniel Bryan. I bet he wishes he was back in the 619 right about now.

10:32:40 PM – Congrats Pittsburgh, you’re officially the worst crowd in WWE history.

10:33:09 PM – Sheamus shows Langston the exit door.

10:33:50 PM – Rollins eliminates Mysterio next. Reigns eliminates Harper only to see his own partner, Dean Ambrose, attempt to send him over the top rope. Reigns then sends Cesaro, Rollins and Ambrose packing at the same time. Cole informs us that Reigns has tied the record for most elimination’s in a single Royal Rumble.

10:35:28 PM – Down to the final four!!!!

10:35:39 PM – Kane just came back to eliminate Punk. 3 left. Batista. Sheamus. Roman Reigns.

10:37:24 PM – The booing continues for no apparent reason. Unreal. In good news, I won my Punk, Reigns, Batista parlay bet. The prize being that I get to be a 33 year old single male watching wresting for another year. I am the winner!!!

10:39:11 PM – Reigns eliminates Sheamus for his record setting 12th elimination tonight. That’s 40 percent of the competition. That’s Stone Cold Steve Austin territory right there.

10:39:42 PM – Damn Pittsburgh, stop booing.

10:40:09 PM – Batista and Reigns just took turns spearing each other. Always funny seeing two guys square off who have the same finishing move.

10:41:22 PM – The Animal is going to WrestleMania. The movie star comes back to help draw an audience in while boosting ticket sales to his own movies. This is a move that is mutually beneficial for both parties involved and the right move at that. Despite finishing second, Roman Reigns is the real winner tonight. The WWE basically announced what most fans suspected anyways, Reigns is Champ in waiting. What a great showing by Roman Reigns tonight and horrendous showing by the city of Pittsburgh. Last one out of Pittsburgh, burn it to the ground.