Design Gal & Her Handyman

{Baker 3 Months}

2013-05-18T23:19:00.002-06:00

"The days go by slow, but the years go by fast!" One of Daddy's coworkers gave me that bit of advice the other day, and boy is that true- and we haven't even reached a year yet! We're at 3 months already?! I can't believe it.

You have become such a smiley, vocal little guy! It's my absolute favorite milestone you've reached by far! Each morning, when we get you out of your crib, you greet us with a big ol' smile and sometimes, even a little chuckle or squeal of delight. When we smile at you, you smile back. We even have little conversations and you tell us stories in your little baby talk.
Sometimes when I'm nursing you, I'll look down and you'll be staring up at me, with your big brown eyes, full of love, and give me a big smile as milk dribbles down your cheek.You've really fallen in love with your momma and it melts my heart.
Everyone that sees you always comments on two things- your beautiful red hair, and the fact that you look exactly like Daddy, both of which make you such a handsome little man! Oh, and you definitely have Mommy's brown eyes!
It's finally really starting to warm up and we had our first outdoor play time! You loved being in the warm sunshine and smelled like such a summer time baby with your sunscreen on! I can't wait for this summer to see you splash around in the kiddie pool!
Speaking of splashing around, you still love your bathy time! You've started kicking more and surprise yourself when you splash water and it hits your face. Silly guy.
You are such a happy, good baby. You generally sleep at least 6 hours or more straight every night and go to bed like a champ. I will usually nurse you, then cuddle you and sing songs to you while I rock you in the glider. Then, after your swaddled, I give you a kiss, turn off your light, and you fall right asleep.
You're such an alert little guy and love looking at different shapes and colors. You're easily distracted, especially when nursing, but I've become more patient as you unlatch and kink your head to see whatever shape is behind mommy. I love how fascinated you've become by the world around you. I hope you're always curious about new things!

You're such a joy to us Baker. Celebrating my first Mothers Day with you was wonderful and I love being your mom. Love you forever,
Mommy

{ motherhood monday: thoughts on mothers day }

2013-05-06T22:12:00.000-06:00

With Mother's Day fast approaching, my mind has been filled with thoughts of where I was last year and where I am now. I've thought a lot about Mother's Day - what it means, what it represents, why we celebrate it. Even now, as a new mother, I have mixed emotions about the day. Let me explain...

Last year at this time, I was in a dark place. After trying to get pregnant for 4 years, and after many fertility treatments, I finally found out I was pregnant. We were thrilled. I was so so happy. And then we lost it. I was devastated. (You can read that post here)

Mother's Day occurred a few weeks after I miscarried. I remember the weeks leading up to that day, I was so angry. Everywhere I looked, everything I read, and it seemed every other commercial on television was an advertisement with unsolicited, mocking reminders of what might have been - something I longed for with every fiber of my being.

Most of all, I dreaded going to church. My religion focuses so much on the family, which is great, and I love that, but when you're not a mother, it made my infertility feel even more pronounced. I couldn't procreate as we're taught. I dreaded when they would ask all the mothers in the congregation to stand to be recognized as they handed out flowers. I dreaded hearing someone speak and talk about how blessed they were because God trusted them enough that He would bless them with these sweet spirits (aka their children). As if I wasn't trust worthy enough to conceive. I couldn't handle one more talk given where someone might say that motherhood was a sacred responsibility. Again, it made me feel like God didn't think I was responsible.

I remember the Saturday before Mothers Day, sobbing, telling Andrew that I couldn't go to church. I wanted to worship God, but the distraction of all the talks on mothers would make me angry, and I didn't want to be angry with God. Andrew understood, and we decided we wouldn't attend.

Later that day, a very sweet friend knocked on my door with a beautiful bouquet of flowers in her hand. She gave them to me with a little card that had a beautiful scripture on it.

I cried when I read it and thanked her so much for the sweet gesture. She told me that she knew what I was going through. She knew I probably wouldn't be at church the next day, and it was okay. She, a mother, understood what I was going through, as she had also suffered many miscarriages.

She told me that even though I didn't have a baby, I was still a mother. I thought about this the rest of the day and the next day. While her words were sweet and kind, I still didn't feel like a mother. The years I struggled with infertility, I read article after article about how sisters, aunts, and all women were mothers. We were mothers "in our own way". While that was a lovely thought, it didn't offer much consolation to one who longed to hold a baby in their arms that was their own.

So tonight, as I write this, I have mixed emotions. I am finally a mother. I am actually looking forward to Mother's Day, and Sunday will no longer bring the familiar sting that it has for so many years in the past. But my heart still aches for those still struggling - who long to be mothers. And who knows - maybe Sunday will come and go and my expectations for the day will leave me feeling lackluster. Maybe it's not all that it's cracked up to be.

And so I propose this - instead of celebrating Mother's Day this Sunday, let's celebrate women in general. We are all, after all, awesome, creative, caring, sensitive, nurturing, talented, women. Whether you can get pregnant or not, whether you are a mother or not, let's celebrate us as women and the women in our lives - not just the mothers.

{ spring time fashion }

2013-04-23T22:38:00.005-06:00

Don't you just love spring time? Everything seems so much brighter and each year I see the new grass growing and think "Is green really that vibrant?" - especially after a bleak winter!

I spotted this dress from Old Navy a few weeks ago and immediately bought it. First, it's so bright and cheery. Second, it's a wrap dress, which on a curvy girl like myself, is always a flattering fit (especially when paired with some spanx)! I plan on wearing it when we bless Baker in a couple of weeks. Oh, and it was cheap! $30!? How could I pass it up?!

P.S. Don't you just love the brushed gold monogram necklace from Peggy Li? Wouldn't this be a perfect Mother's Day gift? I'd choose A & B as the initials for my handyman and bebe (nudge, nudge husband)

spring chic by shansdesign featuring linear earrings

{ motherhood monday: things you don't expect post baby }

2013-04-22T21:31:00.001-06:00

There are some things about motherhood that nobody really tells you. Like even in the "What to Expect" books (which I read front to back), it never talks about "how to maintain friendships after you have a baby" or "how not to go crazy staying inside all day alone with your infant".

When the hubs and I decided that I would stay home and take care of Baker, I was thrilled. To be honest, I didn't particularly love my 9-5, and I wanted to be with my baby as much as I possibly could. I had visions of hanging out with the other stay at home moms in the neighborhood, laughing over silly things our kids did while chatting in the sunshine. I would finally be a part of that elite group I had longed to join for years!

Unfortunately, after I had Baker, I ended up with a pretty bad case of the baby blues which caused me to be an emotional wreck. I was crazy paranoid about going out with my baby, fearing that he'd get RSV and be lifeflighted to Primary Childrens Hospital (a fear planted in my brain by my pediatrician at Baker's 2 week checkup - thanks doc). I stayed cooped up in my house and slowly started getting delirious from cabin fever. It didn't help that Andrew was out of town frequently and the weather was crap, so I couldn't even go on a walk. I'm actually surprised my blog posts didn't start turning into something that looked like "inside all day make shan a dull girl..." repeated over and over again.

On top of that, some of my stay at home mommy friends that lived close were starting to move from the neighborhood. When I found out they were all moving in the same month, I broke down and had major anxiety. It's not like I didn't have any other friends with kids around me, but just having those two neighbors move sent me over the edge.

I started to get more an more lonely. I loved being at home with Baker, but I longed for and missed the adult connections I used to have. I tried to keep myself busy with projects, but there were times I just wanted to sit with a friend and chat in person. I found myself getting more and more depressed until one day I gave myself a slap in the face and said, "Snap out of it girl! You're fun, outgoing, and damn it, just because you have a baby now, doesn't mean you can't have a social life!!"

I decided that I needed to be the one to reach out to other moms in the area. I got on facebook and asked other moms in our area if they wanted to start a play group. I was thrilled with the response! I started calling other friends too - if I couldn't get out, a phone conversation was better than nothing at all!

A few days ago, my friend and I ran to Sonic for happy hour (1/2 price diet dr pepper? yes please!). We had to cut our hang out short because Baker started to get fussy and I didn't have my nursing cover, but just that little outting did wonders for my soul! She probably has no idea, but it meant a lot to me and lifted my spirits!

I still struggle with loneliness and feeling isolated, but it's getting better. Did or do any of you get lonely being a stay at home mom? How do you stay busy and connected, especially with an infant?

{ Homemade Coconut Lime Mint Body Scrub }

2013-04-19T00:00:00.000-06:00

I'm so excited to share this guest post with all of you! If you're like me, you love a great body scrub...but hate spending a lot of money expensive spa brands! Michelle Pino of Skana Spa in New York was nice enough to share a great recipe for a homemade body scrub that won't break the bank! P.S. Wouldn't this make a great gift idea? Mother's Day anyone?

Now that spring has arrived, it’s time to slough off that winter coat- and I don’t mean your jacket! A coat of dry skin may build up during those long winter months. We will explore a quick, easy way to make a homemade body scrub to reveal your feminine glow. This homemade coconut lime-mint scrub will give you the feel of being on a tropical resort, without the cost of being on a tropical resort. Since all of the ingredients are natural and healthy, you can use them for cooking and baking- or just save them up for next time you make the scrub.

You will need:

1 cup Organic Sugar

Sugar will exfoliate dirt and grime from around the pores, which will allow them to breathe. It is important to use organic sugar because other refined sugars contain chemicals like pesticides, which are harmful to the skin. One of the best things about using sugar as am exfoliate is that it will dissolve in the bathtub, which will make clean up quick and easy.

3 tbsp Virgin Coconut Oil

Coconut oil is full of nutrient that will soften your skin, while trailing a beautiful nutty fragrance that lingers for hours. It is important to get the virgin oil, rather than

Note: You may also use macadamia nut oil instead. The idea is to have a light oil that will not overpower the scent of the ingredients.

¼ cup Safflower

This incredibly moisturizing oil will mix with the coconut oil and help to keep it loose and liquid. It will also work to help preserve the scrub longer.

Note: Grape seed oil is a nice alternative.

2 tbsp. Organic Lime Zest

This citrus burst will refresh you every single time. The lime oil also serves as a light toner.

Squeeze of Lime Juice

The juice will brighten and cleanse, while giving the scent a nice tang. Don’t strain yourself too hard to get every drop out of the fruit, a good little squeeze will be fine to add some life in there.

10 drops Peppermint Extract

An inexpensive alternative to peppermint essential oil, this sweet mint extract blends perfectly with the citrus scent and will leave your skin feeling fresh and cool.

How to Make It (watch how easy this is):

Get out a generous size bowl.

Start with the coconut oil. As you spoon the coconut oil from the jar, you may notice that it has solidified. Don’t worry, this doesn’t mean that it has gone bad. Just warm it up for a few seconds by placing it in a dish in some hot water. It will liquefy in no time.

Add the other wet ingredients to the coconut oil.

Lastly, pour in the sugar. Mix it all thoroughly.

Spoon the scrub into an airtight container. (I prefer to use a Mason Jar, but any airtight container will work!)

Couldn’t get any simpler, right? And let’s be honest, who has time for more? Pamper yourself with this scrub in the shower about twice a week to maintain your silky soft new skin. Keep your scrub away from water, so the sugar does not dissolve. Be sure to use a clean spoon each time to dole it out. It should last 2-3 weeks.

Michelle Pino has provided this article. Michelle is the Spa Manager at Skana spa, a spa in upstate NY, where she is able to use the knowledge she learns at work and share it with others. She is passionate about all things related to healthy living as well as, cooking, baking and reading.

Interested in guest posting? Email me for more info!

{ coral & turquoise }

2013-04-18T00:00:00.000-06:00

I stumbled upon a website last night called Polyvore. The site is designed so you can browse through a huge database of clothes, accessories, shoes, etc to make a collage of your dream outfits! They even show what brand and how much each piece is! It was so fun!

Coral & Turquoise by shansdesign featuring a leopard cardigan

If you know me, I love animal prints and I'm pretty sure I own at least 3 animal print cardigans. I also love a good pair of trouser jeans (this curvy girl does not look good in a pair of skinnies!), and who doesn't love coral & turquoise! Here's a little ensemble I came up with. Head over to Polyvore and make an outfit yourself!

{ DIY Nursing Cover }

2013-04-17T14:06:00.000-06:00

Who doesn't love a good hooter hider, or the p.c. term, nursing cover? I didn't get one at my shower and I didn't think I'd need one. For some reason, I imagined I'd always be at a place that had a room I could dash into and nurse. A private room, by myself with soft lighting and maybe a sound machine. Lol. Seriously though, I hadn't thought about it until I started taking little guy out. Usually if I went to my family's house I'd just run upstairs to a vacant bedroom and nurse, but I felt like I was missing out on what was going on downstairs. I finally decided it was time to make one!

Since I am a fabric hoarder, I rummaged through my stash to find a few patterns that I thought went well together. The gray and white polka dot is from Joann ($4.99 a yard) and the chevron is a Mint Blossom pattern in the Down Under collection (which is also the collection of fabric I used for Baker's nursery). It's actually a fat quarter I ordered online! (I think it was a couple bucks)

You'll need the following supplies...

1 yard of fabric for the main portion of the cover (you'll have some left over but you can use it for another project or for the straps on the cover)
1 fat quarter for your contrasting fabric at the bottom & for the straps
14" long piece of boning
1 set of 1" d-rings
Matching thread
Pins

Okay, so first things first, let's make the straps. Take your fat quarter and cut three 3" strips from the longer side of the fat quarter (if there isn't a longer side, take it from whatever side if they're even)

-Sew two of your strips right sides together at the ends, making it 25" long. Cut the other, shorter strap to 10".
-To sew the straps, fold the right sides together, pin, & sew along the raw edge side with a 1/4" seam allowance (pic #1).
-Once you've sewed it, you need to turn it right side out. You can use a loop turner or hook a safety pin to one end and feed it through. However you do it, just get it right side out. :)
-After it's right side out, press it flat with the seam at the side.
-Fold it over 1/4" once, and then fold it over again 1/4" (pic #2). Iron it. (do this on both straps)
-On the shorter strap, take your d-rings and fold the fabric over them & pin in place (pic #3)
-Sew in place (over the area you folded 1/4") and clip strings. Take the longer strap and sew the 1/4" folds down as well. (pic #4)
-Set your straps aside for now.

- Next cut your main piece of fabric (I used the gray polkadot) 20"x38".
- Now take your contrasting fabric (the fat quarter) and cut two strips 6" wide. (see pic #1 below) Sew the two 6" strips together at the ends making one long piece with the seam in the center. (see pic #2 below) Measure and trim it so it's 6"x38".
- I used pinking shears to cut the ends after I sewed them together to keep them from fraying, then I pressed the seam open (see pic #3 & #4)

-Now place that piece of fabric, right sides together, with the main fabric & sew using 1/2" seam allowance. (see pic #5)
-Cut the edge with pinking shears and press the seam open. (see pic #6)
- Now that the body is sewn, it's time to finish the edges. Fold the bottom edge over 1/2" press, and then fold it over again 1/2" and press again. (see pic #7) Pin in place and sew 1/4" in from the top fold (see pic #8).
- Repeat this step on the sides. (DO NOT SEW THE TOP EDGE YET!) Picture #8 shows how the bottom and side edges will look

- Now onto the top! Fold the edge of your fabric over 1/2", press, and then fold over again 1" & press.
- Fold the entire thing in half and measure 7" in from the center (pic #9) and place a pin on both sides of fabric where the 7" mark is (see pic #10).
- Sew a seam in between the two marks. Then insert your boning so it curves in towards the back of the cover. Sew a straight seam on each side to hold it in place. (see pic #11)
- Now grab your short strap. Slide the raw edge under the fold, right next to where you stitched the boning in. (see pic #11).
-Fold it up and pin in place (see pic #12)

- Sew a straight stitch 1/4" from bottom fold along the top of the cover (start on the edge of the cover, sew over the strap, and stop where your boning seam is).(see pic #13)
-Then sew another seam 1/4 from the top of the cover, again, starting at the edge of the cover, sew over the strap again, & stop where the boning seam is)
-Repeat the same for the other strap, but place on the other end of boning. (See pic #14)
-This is how the edge of your top should look after everything is in place.

Now you should have a finished cover! Go, nurse with confidence and enjoy your handiness!

{ Baker 2 months }

2013-04-16T18:06:00.000-06:00

It's amazing how times truly does fly! I know I'll say this each month as I write your little monthly updates, but I honestly feel like I just came home from the hospital with you. Has it really been two months?

By far, my favorite things you've started doing recently are smiling & cooing. Each morning when Daddy gets you out of your crib and brings you to me, you give him the biggest smile and a little baby chuckle. It's like you're so happy to see him and so grateful to get out of your crib! You also smile at Mommy, especially when you get a diaper change! Something about having your pants and diaper off just sends a wave of happiness over you! And who can blame you? It's free to be nakey!
You love your toys, especially the little colorful toys that hang from your car seat handle. The noise they make intrigues you, and to be honest, I love the sound it makes too! It's fun to see you stare at them so intently, really concentrating on the color and textures, and then smile and laugh when we shake them.
It's so fun seeing you kick your arms when you're really excited about something. Your eyes get really wide and you just go wild. You especially do this when I get up to nurse you. The minute you hear your door open and hear my voice, you immediately stop fussing. You know what's coming and you can't hide your excitement for a little midnight snack!
You still look like mini version of Daddy, but you did get my eyes! I'm 99% sure you're going to have brown eyes! Hallelujah!
I also love, love, love your red hair! I never would have thought I'd have a little red head, but you surprised us all! I can't wait to see what a handsome guy you're turning into! Watch out girls!
We finally got a handle of your reflux. You used to cry and cry nursing and pull away sweating and clenching your little fists. Now that you're on some baby antacid, you nurse much better which makes us both happy.
Speaking of nursing, you still love to poop while on the boob. Silly boy. You are also as loud as ever as you nurse- you love your milky time!
You had your first cold this month. As hard as I tried to shield you from the world to keep you from getting sick, you caught a cold (in your eye of all places)! You're a champ at taking your medicine though, which is a relief for me!
You are such a big boy! You weighed 13.4 lbs at your last appointment and you've nearly grown out of your 3 month old clothes!

I just love you so much Baker! I feel so blessed to be your mom and can't wait to see you grow up! (Okay, I can wait...but I do look forward to new experiences with you!)

xoxo,
Momma

my little red

{speculoos...an ode to thee}

2013-04-12T23:52:00.002-06:00

photo via oh joy

cookie butter i love you,

cookie butter, yes it's true!

on an apple or in a shake,

with some toast or on a cake.

if you haven't tried a bite,

you're missing out, it's dynamite!

Seriously friends, have you tried this stuff? Andrew's boss gave this to us as a Christmas gift, and it sat unopened in our cupboard, lonely and alone for months. I'd never heard of it, and I'm not really into peanut butter so I wasn't too interested in this. There was a time I almost threw it away, as I was making room in my cupboard for a jar of Ragu. Shame on me.

Then, one glorious day, a friend posted a picture on Instagram and spoke of it's goodness. I resurrected it from the back of the pantry and gave it a try. I kid you not, my life flash before my eyes, and I knew then that this jar of deliciousness would be shared with generations to come. All I could think was, "Where has this creamy goodness been all my life?!" (Apparently at Trader Joes)

A friend asked me what it tastes like and the only way I could describe it was like this...

"It tastes like what I imagine my house made of cookies in heaven will taste like. Creamy goodness with a hint of gingerbread and crushed biscuits. The angels will sing songs of joy as I dip into the walls of my heavenly mansion. #mykindofheaven"

Then in perusing the internet to find pictures of my new favorite treat, I stumbled upon this little gem over at babies design food.

Sounds uhmayzing, right?

I might have to make this tomorrow. Sure, it might use the calories I might have used for breakfast and lunch, but it's worth it. Yum-mee!!!!

{that time I thought my house was haunted}

2013-04-11T22:57:00.001-06:00

So last week something really freaky happened. I should preface this by saying I'm not usually the type to get really freaked out. Usually, I find a good explanation for whatever creepy thing is happening and I rationalize the situation.

My husband travels sometimes for work. He had to go out of town for a week right after Baker was born, and while I was weary of being alone with Baker 100% of the time, I felt at ease about being by myself in the house. Sure there were times I'd hear a creek and I'd pause for a minute, but I'd just remind myself that the house was settling. It was all good.

The week Andrew went out of town, Baker was still sleeping in our room. While he was gone, I had Baker sleep in this little bassinet thing you can put on your bed so they don't roll out and so that you don't roll on them. I just wanted him a bit closer & it was easier to get to him when he cried at night.

Each night we'd go to bed and he'd wake up around 2 o'clock to eat. We have a dimmer switch on our bedroom light, so when I got up to feed him, I'd turn it on the dimmest setting and turn the light on so it was bright enough for me to see, but not too bright that he'd wake up all the way. It barely lit up the room, but each night when he'd wake up, he'd look up at this blank corner of the ceiling and just start smiling really big. I thought it was just gas bubble smiles at first, since he was so little (like 2 weeks old) and wasn't really old enough to know how to smile at something yet, but each night, he'd stare up at the same spot, and just grin really big. It was cute...but also totally creeped me out. What he was seeing, I have no idea.

One night while Andrew was gone, I got up to feed him, changed his diaper, he did the smile at the ceiling thing, and then I turned off the light and we went back to sleep. Well, about an hour later, I kind of woke up and I swear the light was on in my room. I thought, "That's weird. Did I forget to turn the light off?" I was so tired to get up and turn it off and figured it was dim enough to sleep through, so I just went back to sleep. Well about an hour after that, I woke up because my room was lit up. I realized my computer had come on and the monitor was on. I had shut down the computer before bed (yes our computer is in our room...story for another day) and got really freaked out that the computer was not only on, but the monitor was on and the desktop was up. (Usually, to get to the desktop you have to click on an icon when the computer comes on). I got up and shut the computer down and fell back asleep.

Okay, so fast forward to last week. Andrew was in town and we had moved Baker to his own room. He had been in there for a week or so, and it was going great. I had already told Andrew about the creepy stuff that happened while he was gone and I hadn't thought much about it since then. Baker hadn't really done the smile at the ceiling thing since then, so I just shrugged it off.

Well, one night Andrew and I were in bed sleeping and being the light sleeper I am, I swore that the computer screen turned on and off. I shrugged it off and went back to sleep, but had the more bizarre, freaky dream. I dreamt that I heard Baker crying over the monitor in our room and I also heard another voice on the monitor, but I couldn't make out what the other person was saying. In my dream, I went to his room to see what was going on and when I opened the door, I felt something pushing me out (again, this was a dream). I grabbed Baker in my dream and when I looked at his face, he had this weird smile on his face.

When I woke up from the dream, I was totally freaked out. I had to remind myself it was just a dream and not to worry. Right then, Baker started crying (for reals- not dreaming) and I went to get him. On the way to his room, I could see a light under the door and my heart about jumped out of my cheast. I opened the door and saw that his nightlight was on. It's this LED nightlight that comes on when the lights are off and turns off when the light are on. We had it set to the off position so it wouldn't turn on when the lights were off, but when I saw it was on, I officially freaked out. I grabbed Baker and brought him back to our room. I woke Andrew up and told him I was really scared. I told him about my dream and then I said, "And I'm probably going crazy, but I swear I saw the computer turn on and off..."

Right then, Andrew's eyes got wide and he said, "No, I saw it too." Now we were both freaked out. All I could think was, "OMG, we have to move. We have to move. I can't live in a haunted house! We are moving tomorrow!" Trying to calm down, and being the religious people we are, we prayed for comfort and peace and for whatever was going on to stop. I was trying to rationalize things when I heard a big gust of wind hit the house. Suddenly a light bulb went off in my head.

I told Andrew to go downstairs to see if the power had gone out earlier. It was a stormy night and the wind was pretty strong. He ran downstairs and sure enough, the power had gone out. Right then I felt a wave of relief rush over me. The computer had indeed come on, but it was because the power went out and turned back on. It had re-set the computer. And that's why Baker's night light was on- it had reset itself, and by default when it re-sets it turns on. I justified the dream I had by attributing it to seeing the computer turn on and off. I'm sure when I fell back asleep after seeing it turn on and off, my subconscious thought about the last time it did that and triggered that dream.

So now, I'm relieved I don't have to move and feel silly I was so freaked out. Do you let yourself get scared or do you rationalize?

{ oh poop! }

2013-04-10T13:05:00.001-06:00

A few days ago I noticed Baker's right eye was getting a little red and more "goopy" than normal. I thought maybe he scratched his eye and so I didn't think much of it. Well, when I went into his room Monday night to feed him, his eye looked awful. You know those eye boogers? Well, they were yellowy and icky and all over his eye. I freaked out and while he nursed I googled "eye infection in infant" and got the crap scared out of me by the response the internet fed me. (Why I do this, I don't know. Note to self- don't use WebMD or Google your childs symptoms and freak out until the actual doctor confirms it!)

Anyway, the next morning, I called our pediatrician first thing and made an appointment to get it checked out. Our appointment was at 10:30 and I noticed Baker hadn't really pooped yet - and this kid is a pooper! I attributed his fussiness to the fact that he hadn't pooped and spent a few minutes doing kicky legs and patting his stomach to get things moving. Usually this does the trick, but still, his diaper remained poopless.

10:30 came and we arrived on time to our appointment, checked in, and then sat in the waiting room. We waited and waited and waited to be called back. Every time we've been to the doctor we've had to wait at least 30 minutes, which is so frustrating. (It might be time to find a new pediatrician).

We finally got called back to see the doctor and the nurse had me put Baker on the scale and then she had me move him to the exam table to take his temperature. I started to lift up his shirt, so she could access his armpit, but she said she needed to take it rectally. They'd never done it that way before and usually they use the little ear thermometer. I told her he hadn't pooped yet and she said, "Oh, that's okay! This usually gets things moving!"

And boy oh boy did it! She probably had the thermometer in his bum for about a minute when he exploded. I'm talking projectile poop all over the exam table and all over her hand. She jumped about a foot in the air and I was trying so hard not to crack up. I apologized but secretly I was thinking, "HA! Payback for all those times we had to wait!!" Baker seemed pretty proud of himself and was happy as a clam after that!

Luckily, the nurse had a good attitude about it and laughed it off. I cleaned Baker up and waited (again) for the doctor. We found out the poor kid caught a cold in his eye (I didn't even know that was possible!) and it turned into pink eye. Luckily there are drops to help clear it up and he'll be fine.

Funny little pooper guy!

{ pie for dinner & cat poop in the bed }

2013-04-01T13:20:00.001-06:00

This is an oldie but a goodie - I thought I'd re-post it in honor of today. Enjoy! P.S. The Fauxberry Pie has become our new April Fools Day tradition- yummy!

Originally posted April 2009....

How was your April Fools? Good? Did you get pranked? Or maybe you were the prankster! Well, I love me a GOOD, hilarious, April fools joke! I wanted so badly to prank Andrew first thing in the morning yesterday, but I knew if I started too early, he'd be more suspicious the rest of the day, hence ruining all of the greatest surprises I had in store for him.

Right before noon, I could contain myself no longer though, and called him.

Him: Hey Honey, what's up?

Me: *big sigh* Well...I just got rear ended. Yeah, it's pretty bad. I think it's totaled. I'm just sitting in my car waiting for the police to show up. *another big sigh*

Him: What?! Are you serious? Are you okay?

Me: *trying soooo hard not to laugh* Uh, yeah, I'm okay. But you know the first thing the girl said to me when I got out of the car to see the damage?

Him: Was she rude?

Me: Not really...she said, "APRIL FOOLS!!!"

At this point I was laughing hysterically. He...not so much.

When I got home from work, I went to work on my second prank, "Fauxberry" pie.

On his way home from work, Andrew called to see what was for dinner, and I casually responded, "Oh, I don't know. I'm not really in the mood for anything but pie, so we'll see." I don't think he believed me until he got home and saw that I had something baking in the oven and I was stirring some pink, fluffy stuff (which I told him was the pie topping...you know, kind of like a meringue). He looked at me like I was crazy and said, "Are we really having pie for dinner!?" and I simply replied, "Yeah. It just sounded so good!" Then, while he was in the shower, I quickly got the "pie" out of the oven and "frosted" it with the pink fluff. When he got out, I said, "K, let's eat!" He did a double take at the "pie" and then back and me and just shrugged. It wasn't until I dished it up that he realized it was meatloaf with mashed potatoes on top! He ended up loving it and thought it was not only delicious, but it was a great prank!

FYI: The meatloaf recipe I used was delicious! I didn't put it in a pie crust though, and I used instant mashed potatoes (rather than real) and colored them with a little food coloring (instead of adding pured beets) since Andrew hates beets!

The last prank I pulled was by far, the BEST! I could hardly restrain myself from laughing every time I thought about it. Here's what I did....

P.S. This is not for those who have weak stomachs....don't say I didn't warn you!

I bought a full size tootsie roll, unwrapped it, cut it into 3 pieces, and moulded it into......well........this..Yes, my friends, it LOOKS like cat poop, but it's just my sculpting genius. I placed them under the covers on Andrew's side of the bed, and waited. The best part is that when I went to take the picture, our cat had to check out the goods. I think it just makes the picture that much better, don't you?

When we went to bed, I literally had to bite my tongue so I wouldn't laugh. The moment of pure elation happened when Andrew flipped the covers down and saw this. He took a step back, eyes wide and mouth open in a look of shock. Then he looked at me.

I tried to look as surprised as I could and yelled, "Bad cat!", but it came out more like this, "Bad ca-ha-ha-hat!" as I was laughing so hard. It took him a minute to realize that they were faux terds and then he had a good laugh too.

Sorry, honey! I can't wait for next years pranks!

{ chevron wall }

2013-03-20T23:29:00.000-06:00

I love me a chevron print (as you can tell by my header). So much in fact, that I wanted to devote an entire wall in the nursery to it! After all, how hard could it be?

Welllllll (read that in a high pitched voice and draw it out nice and slow)...let's just say it was a labor of love. A love/hate relationship if you will. Loved it after it was finished. Hated it during the process. It was a pain, but well worth it!

If you're going to tackle this, you'll need a few things- first things first, you need a lot of patience and time. If you rush this, you will have crooked lines. Ain't nobody got time for that!

You'll also need a level (ours was a 36" level)

Green Frog Tape (so important! the blue stuff isn't as good and lets paint seep through- this green stuff didn't bleed at all and our walls are a bit textured. Trust me)

Pencil & Eraser

Stool or Ladder

Paint (duh)

Paint Brush

4" foam roller (I thought the foam roller covered nicer than the fluffy roller)

We started by painting all four walls a light, warmer gray. (I can't remember the color but it was a Behr Ultra Premium paint with primer from Home Depot & covered the orange wall beautifully with only 2 coats!)

When that dried, we set out on measuring our pattern. We measured the whole wall across & divided that into how many zig zags we wanted in the wall. So for example, my wall measured roughly 10 feet wide or 120". I wanted my chevron pattern to be fairly wide, so I decided each angle would be 12" wide & make 10 points total (hopefully that makes sense).

We (and by we, I mean the handyman) marked 12" across and made a little notch with the pencil. Then, we measured 8" under each notch and marked it on the wall (I wanted each of my chevrons to be 8" tall).

Now, here's the important part, you must make sure that your marks are all level or they will be crooked! Level vertically and horizontally! This is where the level comes in!

Once your marks are all up and everything is level, you're ready to start taping. We put tape in between the lines we weren't going to paint, so we didn't get confused. Oh, and to make sure each point was nice and sharp, Andrew carefully cut each mark with an xacto knife.

Finally it was all taped up! The easiest part was painting it! 2 coats of white paint later and it was done!

I let it dry for about 30 minutes and then peeled the paint off (I was impatient and had to see how it turned out). I loved it and decided it was worth all the effort!

{ Baker 1 Month }

2013-03-16T20:04:00.000-06:00

Oh my gosh- I had no idea writing this would make me so emotional! Little man, you are getting so big and it's passing by so fast! I can't believe it's been an entire month since you were born!

- You're such a big, strong boy! From the first day you were born, you've held up your little head! In the last month, you've also started to sit up for a few seconds when we hold you, and you love to try to "stand" when I hold you up straight and put your feet on my legs.

- Nursing has become second nature to you. You caught on so quick, which was such a relief to me! I love the time I spend with you nursing. You make the sweetest and funniest noises when you eat. I wish I could record the sighs and grunts you make while you nurse. You definitely vocalize when you're enjoying your meal! Sometimes you get "crazy head" when you're really hungry and your frantically looking for something to latch on to, moving your head from side to side like you're starving. You eventually find what you're looking for and then you're happy.

-So far, you love your car seat and fall asleep in it the minute we put you in it. Let's hope this lasts! You also like car rides and going on walks in the stroller.

- You know your momma's voice and immediately turn your head when you're awake and hear me speak. My favorite time of the day is when you're awake. I hold you up, facing me, and we talk. I sing you silly songs I make up or we play kissy toes (when you push your feet up to my face and I kiss your feet). Your expressions are priceless, and even though you can't speak back, I know we're communicating in our special way.

- Everyone who knows your dad knows that you are your father's son. I like to say you're his "mini me". Daddy is one handsome fella, so I'm happy you look like him! I think you're getting momma's brown eyes though! You also move all around in your sleep - another trait you picked up from daddy! I'll put you down for a nap in your crib, and when I check on you, you've moved into a completely different position. Little bed monkey.

- You're our little squirt. A nickname bestowed upon you after countless diaper changes. When the cool breeze of fresh air hits your bum during a diaper change, you can't help but pee (we've gotten used to covering your little wee during a diaper change to avoid getting sprayed) or you squirt a little poop while you're being wiped. You like to keep us on our toes. And while we're on the topic, it seems your favorite time to poop is when you're nursing. You get a very serious look on your face, stop sucking, and then bam, you poop and go right back to eating. Silly guy.

- Bathy time is your favorite activity so far. I'll never forget your first bath. I was so nervous, but you handled it like a champ and put momma at ease. You love the warm water and even love having your hair washed. I can't wait until you can splash around and interact more!

- You hate lotion and cry anytime I put it on you. Even if it's warm, you still squirm and cry. You also hate beanies or anything on your head, but you love to have your hair played with! Nothing relaxes you more than when momma runs her fingers over the top of your head.

Baker, you have changed my life in ways I could never have imagined. You're such a good baby and have brought so much joy and love into our lives. I can't wait to see what the future holds.

Love,
Momma

{ a day in the life... }

2013-03-13T23:23:00.000-06:00

3:45am - I hear a little cry in the night. Little man is hungry. He slept for about 4 1/2 hours before he woke up, so I know he's hungry. I feed him on both sides, burp him, swaddle him back up and put him back in his bassinet.

4:30am - Baker hasn't fallen asleep, and neither have I. He's fussy and I've given him his binkie, but he keeps spitting it out. I listen in the dark as he squirms and fusses, hoping he'll succumb to the night and fall back asleep. He doesn't. *sigh* I get up and put his binkie back in his mouth, hoping it'll sooth him, but as I get up, I knock over a bottle of prenatal vitamins that were on my side table. Oh well. I leave them on the floor. He continues to spit his binkie out, and I continue to get up to fix it. This happens about 5 times. I can't keep getting up to put his binkie back in his mouth.

5:00am - He's still fussy, so I get up, take him out, change his diaper (which was just barely wet from when I fed him at 3:45), swaddle him again so his arms are free (sometimes he hates feeling constricted - can you blame him?) and decide against the binkie. I hold him close and tight and hum softly to him. His eyes start to droop. I feel hopeful that it's working. His eyes open again, but they're kind of squinty. He's fighting this. The battle is on. I hold him tighter and start to rock a little. I continue to hum softly. He starts to close his eyes. I feel his body start to go limp and his eyes start doing the rapid eye movement thing. YES! He's asleep! Victory! I quietly and gently place him back in his bassinet, holding my breath. I'm so tired.

5:30am - I stand by his bassinet, waiting for any signs of movement. I'm silent and try to keep my breathing as quiet as possible. When I think he's good and alseep, I turn to get into bed. Suddenly, I hear a loud rattle. Damn it! I kicked the bottle of vitamins that I left on the floor. I freeze, holding my breath again. Baby stirs, grunts, and then it's silent. Phew! I crawl into bed as quietly as I can. As my head hits the pillow, I hear him start to squirm. Oh no. He grunts, then gets fussy. This can't be happening. I wait. He starts to cry. I feel like crying & I wait some more. His soft cries turn into full blown crying. He's mad and tired. I'm exhausted and don't know what to do. I decide to let him cry it out.

5:37am - I check the clock. How long do you let them cry it out? The minutes are passing at a snail pace. Do I get up? I get teary. I hate hearing him cry. Just wait Shannon. Five minutes pass, but it feels like eternity.

5:45 - Still crying. Okay, I decide I'm going to get up. Suddenly, there is a pause in his crying. I wait. He wimpers, lets out one last cry, and then it's silent. I listen. I can hear him breathing. Is he sleeping? I wait a few more minutes and then shine my cell phone light on him. Success! He's finally asleep! I lay back down and try to fall back asleep as well.

6:45 - I wake up and hear him fussing again. I bring him back to bed with me and offer the boob. He doesn't want it and falls asleep in my arms. I lay him in bed with me and we fall asleep again.

7:20 - Baker wakes up, squirming. He's stretching and trying to wake up. I pat his tummy and try to help him get coherent enough to nurse. This time, he eats.

7:50 - Time to go downstairs. I put him in his bouncy/vibrating seat while I make myself breakfast. He falls asleep.

8:00 - I fall asleep on the couch

9:00 - I wake up, clean up the kitchen, and turn on the tv. I start to watch It's Complicated (LOVE the house and interior in that movie!)

9:45 - Little man wakes up, hungry. He eats and does a big ol' fart/poop as he's eating (which seems to be his favorite time to poop). When he finishes nursing, he's wide awake. We chat for a bit and I sing to him. He makes funny faces and acts like he wants to say something back. Funny baby. I change his diaper and naturally, as I'm wiping his bum, he does another big fart and poop comes flying out. Squirty baby poop. Ewww...luckily, I catch it in his diaper. Disaster averted. With a new dydie on, we play some more & then I put him in his swing.

10:30 - He falls asleep in his swing. I take him out and carry him up to his crib to nap. One of my girlfriends texts and asks if we'd like to go on a walk. The weather is beautiful today and I tell her we can meet up at noon. I'm excited about the fresh air and sunshine! While he's sleeping, I shower, make my bed, & get ready.

11:45 - I get little man ready for our outing. He's dressed appropriately and I think he might need to wear a beanie to keep his head warm. I place a snugly, soft beanie on his head and he freaks out. Like, really freaks out. I quickly take it off his head and frantically check inside the hat to see if something poked him. There is nothing in there. I look all over his head for signs of injury, which judging by his cry, must have happened. Still, there is nothing. I console him and he's fine. Note to self: No beanies.

12:00 - I put him in his car seat which is built to fit into the stroller & fasten him in, even though we're just walking around the block. You never know when a sudden gust of wind might knock the bulky stroller over. Better safe than sorry (I'm still paranoid). He's got a blankie over him, which makes him quite comfortable and cozy. We meet up with my girlfriend and walk around the block, then stop at the park behind our house and chat in the sun. Little man sleeps through the whole outing, covered by the canopy of the stroller, with the added protection of his car seat cover over that.

1:30 - It's time for him to eat so we say goodbye to our friends. He nurses & falls back asleep after he burps. I put him in his bouncy seat and dust.

2:30 - Baby wakes up and I hold him up so he's facing me. I talk to him and he makes more funny faces. We take pictures to send to grandma. He loves the camera - can you tell?

3:00 -Time for another dydie (aka diaper) change. I take him up to his room to change him on the changing table. As I clean him up, I hold his diaper up as a shield, in case he squirts again. So far, he seems okay. I put my guard down (aka the old diaper), and as I grab the new diaper to slide under his bum, he decides it's time to drop another deuce and lets a fresh load loose. It's projectile. My knee jerk reaction is to catch it in my hand, which I do, but most of it gets all over. Thankfully, he was laying on a disposable changing table pad, which caught most of it. There is a little poop on his hutch. I reach for the wipes. We go through about 10. He obviously thinks this is great fun, and while he is kicking and waving his arms and legs around in a victory dance, he manages to smear his foot in the poop puddle. Awesome. All I can do is laugh. Oh little guy!

3:15 - We're finally both cleaned up. I put him in his bouncy seat and start blogging. He loves his seat and is kicking his legs and moving his arms around. I think he's plotting his next poop sabotage.

3:30 - Baker falls asleep and I move him to his crib. I watch him for a minute, as he makes all sorts of funny faces in his sleep. I can't get enough of him. I go back to my bedroom and sort the laundry while I dance around to my "live life and love it" mix on Spotify. I really break out the moves when OutKast's Hey Ya comes on. Too bad Baker is asleep and has to miss this. Momma's got moves!

5:00 -Time to eat again. After he eats, we pack up and head to gammy's house. She is watching him while I run some errands. (Again, still paranoid momma and don't want to take him out to public places - covered or not).

7:45 -After a trip to Walmart & Kohls, I return home to find little guy just waking up. I nurse him and after he's done eating, he wakes up and does his cutest tricks for all of us to fawn over.

9:45 - We return home from our outing and he's hungry. Once again, I nurse, burp, and we play for a bit. Then it's time for jammies and a fresh dydie.

10:35 - Present time. We're about to go to bed, and I feel anxious about what the night will hold. I have a tentative plan of action, should things mimic last nights events, however if you're a mom, you know that most "plans" get thrown out the window. In the mean time, I've swaddled him up, gave him a new binkie (this one seems to stay in better than the other kind I was using), cuddled for a minute, and then I placed him in his bassinet. He fussed for a bit, so I picked him up and patted his back. It only tooks a few minutes before he fell back asleep. So far, he's stayed asleep....

*yawn* Wish us luck tonight! Good night!

P.S. This is where I want all you lurkers to come out of the woodwork and comment!! What works for you when you put your babies to bed? I try to make it as quiet and silent as possible, so he knows the difference between daytime napping and sleep time. Any thoughts would be appreciated! (As long as you don't tell me I'm a bad mom! Ha!)

{ the baby blues }

2013-03-12T19:36:00.001-06:00

I was going to write about this when I was in the hospital, when the baby blues first hit, but my emotions were too crazy at the time and I felt like I wasn't in the right state of mind. I worried in my unstable state, I'd say things I'd regret later, so I've held off writing this until now.

Even now, writing this is a little bit hard for me. Thoughts of those dark days right after giving birth bring back memories that evoke anxious feelings. While the blues have mostly passed, there are days when that feeling creeps up, and I have to take a deep breath (okay, many deep breaths) and talk myself through what I'm feeling. Why am I feeling this way? What triggered it? Then I validate my feelings and do something to help it pass.

For those of you who have never experienced the baby blues or any kind of postpartum depression, all I can say is, count your blessings! It's terrible and honestly, I feel like it's something that nobody warns you about or talks about. I remember when I first felt like I was going to cry for no reason and the anxiety that came with it, I thought, "Why the heck did nobody warn me about this!?"
That is why I'm bringing it up now- to put it out there, share my experience, and hopefully offer help or hope to anyone coping with it.

For me, I started feeling the blues the night after I delivered (I delivered at 12:11am, so it came on about 18 hours or so after my c-section). My initial reaction to the blues was confusion. After such a joyous event, why was I suddenly feeling sad and anxious? I felt overwhelmed, frustrated, and I was getting more and more irritable. For no reason at all, a lump would rise in my throat, and I'd start crying. I didn't want to concern or alarm my husband, so most of the time I'd cry when he'd leave to grab something to eat (the hospital food was terrible) or I'd send him on an errand for me and let the water gates flow. Whenever anyone would ask how I was feeling, the lump in my throat would return and it would take everything I had not to cry. Most of the time, I'd just break down.

Thankfully, I had some amazing nurses who sat with me while I cried and talked about my feelings. They told me what I was feeling was totally normal and that I was doing a great job. Motherhood is overwhelming and exhaustion doesn't help! The exact cause of the baby blues is unknown, but it's thought to be related to the hormone changes that occur during pregnancy and again after a baby is born. These hormonal changes may produce chemical changes in the brain that result in depression. Also, lack of sleep, adjusting to a new routine, and emotions from the childbirth experience itself can all contribute to how a new mom feels. Most of the time, women experience the blues 4-5 days after giving birth, however depending on how the birth went, it depends. For me, I had a long, hard labor and then a c-section. They "cleaned me out" pretty good, which depleted pretty much any trace of hormones that I had left in me. So I went from a lot of good feeling hormones to practically zero in a 24 hour period. Talk about crash and burn. It sucked.

The day after I delivered was even worse. I couldn't hide my feelings from Andrew and the poor guy was so worried about me. He wanted to fix whatever it was that was bothering me, as husbands often do, but there was nothing he could do. Thankfully, he also listened to me and held me when I cried. He also kept his patience when I was impatient and irritable (which was pretty much all of the time and at extreme levels). I remember calling my mom, just bawling. I told her I felt totally overwhelmed and I was so anxious (not in a good way) and everything was irritating me. She too listened just listened and tried to help the best mom's can.

When my family would come visit, I tried to put on a happy face, but I was paranoid about people getting my baby sick, worried if they held him the right way, and I felt like I had to be a good host & entertain visitors, which was exhausting. On top of that, I was trying to get the hang of breast feeding and when people would come to visit, I was worried about keeping a schedule and if he went 15 minutes past the time he was supposed to nurse, I'd have a panic attack. I found out later that visitors can trigger anxiety when you have the blues. I also lost my appetite completely, which for a nursing mom, isn't good.

By Monday, I started to research what I was feeling. I thought I was going crazy, and while I never had any thoughts of hurting myself or my baby, I didn't want it to get to that point (which can happen with sever postpartum depression). Amazingly, even though the blues and depression aren't something people really openly talk about, there were a LOT of resources online. I found out what I was feeling was normal and common even. I was relieved to know that I wasn't alone feeling this way.

The blues didn't go away until about a week and a half after giving birth, but like I said, there are still days when something triggers my anxiety and I feel like crying, but I've learned how to cope with it. For some though, the feelings last longer and can get more intense. If they do, please talk to your doctor! Postpartum depression is so common and there is nothing wrong with you! Your doctor can prescribe the best treatment for you, whether it be medication or talking to a counselor or both- ain't no shame in getting some help!

And if you know of anyone who's going through this, the best thing you can do is to just listen. Encourage her to cry if she needs to. Do whatever you can to help and alleviate her stress. Also, reassure her that everyone feels this way and it's normal! Give her space if she needs it and try not to get offended.

Some things that helped me were to talk it out. I cried a lot and felt better after I did. I asked for help (which is hard for me, but so worth it!), and I made myself get up and ready each day. It's so easy to just lounge in your pajamas and skip the shower, and it was hard sometimes finding the time and the effort it took, but let me tell you- when I did get ready and put on a little makeup and attempted to do my hair (I let it dry curly, but at least I washed it, right?) I felt so much better! I also made a schedule for myself. If I didn't stick to it exactly, it was okay, but knowing what I needed/wanted to accomplish that day helped me feel more structured. It was so hard going from working full time and being around adults all day, to being cooped up in the house with a sleepy newborn. The list helped me get past the loneliness and feel productive. I also made a list of everything I wanted and needed to get done- anything from sewing to cleaning the bathroom so I'd keep myself busy.

The baby blues and postpartum depression are terrible, but know it's normal to feel that way and there are ways to cope. I hope that my experience helps anyone suffering right now and know that it get's better. :)

Did you have the blues/postpartum depression? What helped you cope? What advice would you give to someone experiencing this? Your comments are appreciated!

{ faux galvanized letter }

2013-03-11T00:00:00.000-06:00

I love the look of big, galvanized letters.

I really wanted to find a vintage one for Baker's room, however after looking all over antique & thrift stores, I decided it would be easier and cheaper to make my own.

I bought a big ol' 23.5" paper mache letter from Joann. They run about $10 but if you use your 40% off coupon, it's really cheap!

These are the paints & colors I used- again, very cheap! I think they're around a $1.50 each at Joann or Hobby Lobby.

First, I painted a coat of the flat, Charcoal paint by Delta all over the letter. I let it dry for about a minute (just until it didn't get all over my hands). You can let it dry longer, but I was in a hurry. The whole project took me about 10 minutes.

Because galvanized metal isn't flat, I needed to add some dimension and sheen. I used a scrap piece of fabric, bunched it up, and blotted on the darker metalic paint (FolkArt Metallic in Gunmetal Gray). There wasn't really any rhyme or reason to it - i just blotted and smeared here and there, leaving a tiny bit of the flat color showing under it. Make sure you do this on the inside and outside areas of the letter- not just the face of it!

I used the same technique for the last step but with the lighter metallic paint (FolkArt Metallic in Silver Sterling, and blotted here and there to show some of the darker metallic.

Don't worry if it's not perfect - you just want the illusion that it's metal!

Here is the finished product! I poked a hole in the back of the letter and hung it with a small nail. It's so light, you could even hang it with a push pin.

I love how it turned out! Now go make one too!

{ Baker's Nursery }

2013-03-09T13:37:00.003-07:00

I must admit, when I found out we were expecting, I was so excited - not just for a baby, but to decorate a nursery! I could hardly wait to find out what we were having so I knew what direction I wanted to take as far as colors go! (Although designing a gender neutral nursery would be fun!)

When we found out we were having a boy, we instantly knew his name. Baker, for those of you who don't know, is a family name. It's my mom's maiden name and I've always thought it would be a great first name. I told Andrew years ago that I loved the name Baker and he immediately thought it was cool too. Because the name is fairly unique, we kept it on the down-low until he arrived. Our family only knew his name started with a B, and I knew I wanted to incorporate his monogram in the nursery.

As you can see, I was definitely inspired by the chevron print. I knew I wanted gray and white walls with hints of turquoise throughout the room. I didn't want it too matchy matchy though, which is why I added pops of other colors in his quilt & in the artwork.

I wanted to make a quilt for my little guy and found a great tutorial for a chevron quilt on Pinterest. Click here for the link. It was my first quilt and it turned out fabulous! I'll post the details of my projects later- for now this is all about the nursery!

Awhile ago on one of my business trips to Boise, I found an adorable, vintage childrens book called The ABC Book that was in great condition. The framed print is a page from that book. The old truck painting was given to Andrew by his artist friend (it's a painting of Andrew's favorite truck), and used to hang in his office (now the nursery). I loved how it looked so we kept it up! And last, the B is for Baker print is from the On To Baby website. You can find the link to the free printable here. I had mine printed at Costco for about $1.

What do you do with all of your cute cards you get from your baby showers? I pulled some of my favorite and used a wire card holder to display them! It's a fun way to display art in an unconventional way!

The changing table hutch is one of my favorite finds, well, besides his crib! I got Bakers crib from my parents neighbors who were having a yard sale. I actually bought it before I was even married! How could I pass up a $60 crib?! And one from Pottery Barn? It's traveled around with Andrew and I from house to house and then sat in our attic for years. When we brought it down, all we had to do was wipe the dust off and set it up! I love it!

The changing table hutch was a classified find. I called the lady and offered her $20 more than what she was asking because it was exactly what I was looking for and I had to have it! After a coat of white & turquoise paint, and it was perfect!

The crate shelves are just that- stacked crates! Cheap, fun, easy shelving for a small area!

Where I found the other items...

Glider: Target

Curtain Rod: Pottery Barn

Curtains: Ikea

Shelf above crib: Ikea

Frame with ABC Print: IkeaLamp Shade: Ikea

Crates: Joann

Crib Sheets: Target

Quilt Fabric: Down Under by Mint Blossom

Crib Skirt Fabric: Quilting Cottage

{ Baker's birth story }

2013-03-07T19:47:00.003-07:00

I started writing this when I was in the hospital and like all of you know, when you get home life takes over and I put this on the back burner.

I really should have finished writing this while everything was fresh in my mind, so while Baker is napping and before too much times passes, I wanted to write about the week leading up to his birth & what happened when the day finally came.

The last few weeks of my pregnancy had been rough, with my feet, ankles, legs, & hands swelling up like crazy & my blood pressure rising. I went in for my regular weekly appointment on February 7th, and while we were there, the doctor asked us if anyone had talked to us about when we'd deliver (I see a team of doctors instead of just one). Andrew and I looked at each other like "Um, no...." and we told the doctor we were just planning on delivering when I went into labor. My doctor then told me that due to my high blood pressure and the levels of protein in my urine, I was heading towards pre-eclampsia. He thought I should deliver on the 15th.

All I could think was "WHAT?!" I immediately called my mom, excited but also anxious. Delivering on the 15th meant that my baby would be 2 weeks early. Was he ready? Was I ready? I trusted my doctors though and headed over to labor and delivery for a quick non stress test. Since baby was fine, they sent me home with 2 big ol' empty jugs, 2 toilet "hats", and told me I had to track my urine for the next 24 hours. Because capturing and keeping each drop of urine ice cold isn't really conducive with work (would you want a jug of pee sitting in ice on your desk?!) I called my boss and let her know I wouldn't be in the next day. I also told her that because of the swelling and high blood pressure, my doctors wanted me to stay off my feet and basically said I shouldn't return to work until further notice (darn it, right?)

So I went home, began the urine test (which really wasn't as hard as I thought it would be) and relaxed as much as I could. Hearing that my baby would be coming sooner than later, all I could think about were all the things I had left to do. I still hadn't gotten around to doing the binding on his quilt for his room, my house was a mess (I totally wanted to deep clean before he came), I didn't have a diaper bag, my bags weren't packed, etc etc. Looking back now, they weren't really big deal things- I mean, it's not like I didn't have car seat or a place for him to sleep, but still, I hate feeling unprepared. On top of that, Andrew took a last minute trip to Dallas for work. We knew the baby wasn't coming before Friday and I figured I'd be fine while he was gone. He left on Saturday and was supposed to come on Thursday night. One day before I was to deliver. (I know, I know...what were we thinking!?)

You've heard the term, when it rains it pours, right? Well on Monday, I had another appointment with my doctor to verify that things were still okay and that Friday was still the date. Right as I was leaving for my appointment, I heard water running in my living room. Not a good sign. I opened up the utility closet and saw that my water heater was leaking like crazy- the overflow pipe was gushing water and while it was draining into the overflow like it's supposed to, the overflow was leaking & water was getting everywhere. I quickly called my dad and asked if that was normal. He said it wasn't (duh Shan) and offered to call plumbers. Then I called Andrew in a panic as I headed to my appointment. I told him I thought it would be okay while I was gone (the water wasn't leaking into our living room floor yet but it wasn't looking good). I quickly went to my appointment, verified that I was still going to have a baby on Friday, but they wanted to do one more non-stress test that day. Overwhelmed, I called my mom and started crying, "My water heater is broken and I have to go to the hospital for a NST! I need someone! Andrew is in Texas!" My poor mom interpreted that as "my water broke and I'm going to the hospital" and told me she'd head down right then. I called Andrew crying and told him I couldn't handle what was going on and he needed to get on the next flight home. While he worked on that, he called his dad who came down to help me fix my water heater. My mom, dad, & father in law showed up at the same time, and what could have been an expensive fix ended up being pretty minor. My mom took me to the hospital for my NST while the dad's fixed the water heater. The NST showed everything was fine - phew - and Andrew was heading home the next morning. (Really, what was I thinking letting him go on a business trip the week I was supposed to give birth? Live and learn, right?!)

When friends and family caught word that the baby was coming sooner than later, they asked if I needed anything. Normally, I would tell them I was fine, but this time I actually took them up on their offers! I asked my sister in laws to help me clean my house and they were more than willing! It was so nice to know that I'd have a nice, clean, organized house to come home to after I got home from the hospital. There was also so much I hadn't gotten done yet. Minor things, but still - like sewing my quilt, boppy cover, car seat cover, putting up drapes in Baker's nursery, etc. Like I said, small things, but I still felt unprepared.

The night before Baker arrived was bittersweet. I feel silly, but honestly, thinking back to that night, I still get a little teary. Andrew helped me pack my bag for the hospital, and as we crawled into bed I started crying. I thought about how it was the last time my little guy was going to be in my stomach. There's something so intimate about feeling your baby move inside you. I was excited to hold him in my arms, but after spending so much time - just he and I - I was emotional. Then I started thinking about how long it had been just Andrew and I. When I explained why I was crying, Andrew cried with me. They were happy, thankful tears - we had been hoping and praying for this for years and knowing we'd finally meet our little guy the next day was so sweet. We had our last family prayer with just the two of us and thanked the Lord for blessing our lives and then went to bed. I hardly slept that night, anxious about what was to come.

The Big Day...
We were scheduled to be at the hospital at 6:30am. I woke up at 5:00, got ready, & headed over to the hospital with everything we'd need. I figured if I got there at 6:30, we'd probably have a baby by 3:00pm at the latest...boy was I wrong!
Shortly after we arrived, they started the pitocin and broke my water at 7:30. I hadn't gotten my epidural yet, because I wanted to experience labor pains (call me crazy) and the sensation from having my water break was unlike anything I've ever experienced. Pretty much like peeing your pants but the water literally gushed out and just kept coming. I was amazed at how much fluid there was (TMI? Get used to it...)! Any time I'd adjust myself or laugh, more would come out, which would make me laugh more.

Around 10:30, I was starting to feel some contractions. Nothing major- just small cramping. It felt like menstrual cramps and I still didn't feel like I wanted the epidural yet. It wasn't until the nurses came in to hook me up to the internal monitors that I realized pain killers would be nice. (Since baby boy kept moving around, the external monitors weren't tracking his heart rate like they should.) They attempted to insert them and ohmuhgosh...I about died. I thought being "checked" for dilation hurt...oh no. This was excruciating. They got the wire in that monitored my contractions, but they couldn't connect the other wire to baby's head in the right spot. After trying for what seemed like forever (it was actually only a few minutes), they gave up and would try again in a bit.
When they left, I broke down, started crying and told Andrew I was ready for the epidural. I felt like it took the anesthesiologist forever to get there and even the epidural hurt. He was having trouble getting the catheter in the right spot in my spine and feeling him feel around hurt. Ouch. Finally, they got it in and within a few minutes, I was way more comfortable. It wasn't long after that when the nurses tried the internal monitors again and got them connected to the baby.

Every hour or so, the nurse would come in and check to see how far I'd progressed. Things were moving very slowly, but baby was doing fine, so they upped the pitocin just a bit to help me progress faster. At 3:00 I was finally dilated to a 5 and they said usually it's pretty fast from there & normally you progress about a centimeter each hour. We should have a baby here by 9:00, I thought! Sadly, that didn't happen.

Around 5:00 I started feeling the contractions pretty bad. I pressed the button for the epirdural a few times for another dose of medicine, but the pain wasn't subsiding. Finally, we called the nurse in. My epidural had run out and the alarm on the bag that warns you when the medicine is getting low didn't go off. At that point, I could feel everything and I was having some pretty intense contractions. My mom coached me through them, while I tried breathing through them and cried. To ya'll who do this naturally, kuddos to you! I think I could have managed the pain better, had I not had the pitocin and had I been prepared for it, but in the moment, it was awful. The anesthesiologist came back in, fixed me back up, and all was well.

Finally, at 10:30 at night, my doctor came in to talk to me. He explained that even though baby was doing well, I was still at a 5 and even felt like I was starting to swell up. He said I was more like a 4 1/2. It was time for us to start talking about a c-section.

A lump immediately formed in my throat and I did my best to not start bawling until after he left the room. Then I broke down. A c-section was not part of my plan at all. I was exhausted and terrified. The doctor suggested we talk it over and have him come back in an hour to check again. My dad was there and he and Andrew gave me a blessing. I immediately felt comforted and knew that while this wasn't in my plan, things would be okay, and the c-section was the route we needed to take to get him there safely.

The doctor came back in, checked me (I was a 4 by then- definitely swelling) and they prepared me for the c-section. The rest is a bit blurry. I was honestly so tired and keeping my eyes open felt like torture. I remember them wheeling me back to the operating room and a new anesthesiologist (who was so amazing and so so sweet) talked to me about what they were going to do. He stayed with me the whole time and assured me that everything was going to be okay. I'm so grateful for his help and assurance during that time! Andrew was the only one allowed in the room as far as family went and I made sure he took lots of pictures. He was also a great support and kept telling me I was doing great.

When they got me on the operating table, they put the screen up and started the procedure. I couldn't really feel them cutting me but I could feel the pressure. And after laboring for 18 hours, I thought it hurt like hell. After about 5 minutes, I felt some movement and then heard the most amazing sound I will ever hear - my baby's first cry! He was not a happy boy, going from a cozy, warm environment to a bright, cold room! They told us he was a boy (which we knew, but it was still a nice confirmation!) and I saw them carry him over to the table to get cleaned up and I couldn't stop crying or laughing. I was so happy! I just wish I could have held him in my arms right after he was born. But I was grateful he was okay and healthy.

Because he was posterior & situated funny inside me, he had such a little cone head from the pressure on my cervix! Poor baby! He was 9 pounds & 21 inches long - 2 weeks early! Can you imagine if I'd gone to 40 weeks!?

Once he was wrapped up, the nurse brought him to me. I couldn't believe how beautiful and big he was! I kissed him and just stared in awe at this little one that Andrew and I created. It was amazing.

While they stitched me back up, Andrew took him back into the labor and delivery room to introduce him to the rest of our family. When they wheeled me back in, we announced his name to everyone. I tried to breast feed that night, but I was so tired and couldn't stay awake. I had them take him to the nursery for the night so I could sleep. At this point it was about 1:30am.

Andrew was amazing through the whole ordeal. So supportive and loving. It was love at first sight for both of us! All in all, things definitely didn't go as I planned or hoped, but I'm so grateful for all the support we received for good doctors! Mostly I'm grateful for our healthy, beautiful baby boy.

Aren't my guys handsome?

{ he's here! }

2013-02-18T12:10:00.000-07:00

Baker Andrew Crawford

2-16-13

9lbs

21" long

We are so in love!

{ Parenting do's and don'ts }

2013-02-13T15:43:00.001-07:00

{ pregnancy diary: week 35, 36, 37ish }

2013-02-11T20:59:00.000-07:00

Oh who am I kidding- this poor blog has been neglected and I've done a terrible job writing about my pregnancy.

Truth be told, I feel like I've had it rough! I've been sick non stop since September, due mainly to the awful sick season we've had (colds, flu, strep, etc) and the dang inversion (remember when our air quality was one of the worst in the world?!). I had a bad gallbladder attack and spend a little time in labor and delivery for that! Then there was the time I totally biffed it and landed on my 35 week pregnant belly (picture someone dropping, arms out front, to slide down a slip n slide, except instead of a slip n slide, it was concrete and the water was frozen ice). I also spend a little time in L&D for that fun flop. And finally, I've swelled up like a summer sausage. At first I thought it was just pregnancy swelling, but after my feet, ankles, and legs kept getting bigger and bigger, and my blood pressure started getting higher and higher, we realized I had a little pre-eclampsia. More time in L&D and a few tests later, my doctor has decided to induce me this Friday. I'll be 38 weeks exactly and little guy is measuring big, so I'm sure we'll be fine.

Really though, for all that I've been through, I wouldn't change a thing. I still can't believe that I'm pregnant.

I can't believe that in 4 short days, I'll be holding this tiny human that's been growing in my belly. I will finally see the face that me and Andrew created.

I'm going to be a mom!

Any last bits of advice?

{ Happy New Year! 2013 }

2013-01-01T20:46:00.000-07:00

image via etsy

I hope you all had a wonderful New Years Eve! Is it just me, or did this years eve seem a little unstimulating? Maybe it's because I'm so pregnant and can hardly keep my eyes open after 10:30, or that it fell on a Tuesday this year (midweek Holidays totally throw me off)!

To be honest, New Years Eve hasn't really held the excitement for me that it did when I was single. Not that I don't enjoy getting together with friends and kissing my handsome husband now, but when you're single, the thrill of wondering if you're going to get a New Years kiss and meeting someone adds to the excitement! I got my first kiss on New Years Eve when I was 17. I went to a downtown celebration in Salt Lake City called First Night and I remember my dad was so worried I wouldn't get home safely (that was the year the world was supposed to crash from Y2K - remember that?) My single friends and I danced the night away down town, laughed, and joined a huge crowd outside for the countdown. That's when I saw curly haired boy. We eyed each other through the crowd, and when the clock struck midnight, he swooped in and kissed me! My friends were shocked- one minute I was standing there with them and the next I was making out with some guy I didn't know. I was quickly whisked away to chase another group of guys, and to this day I don't know curly haired boy's name and I never saw him again, but he did give me my first kiss (which wasn't that great) and a nasty case of strep throat. Oh, those were some good times. Ha ha ha!

What did you do on New Years Eve this year? Party? Go to bed early? Gather with friends and play games? Whatever you did, I hope it was just what you wanted to do! We spent the night with good friends, eating Indian take out (delicious!), and chatting with Dick Clark's New Years Eve Bash in the background. By 11:00 I was ready for bed, so we headed home. I feel asleep on the couch and woke up just in the nick of time to get a good New Years kiss as the clock struck twelve. Then we toasted with some sparkling cider, and I watched from the window as the hubs lit a big ol' firework out front (I was in my jams by then and besides, it was freezing)!

2012 brought a myriad of events in our lives- good and bad. From experiencing the heartbreak and despair of a miscarriage, to going through the adoption process, to unexpectedly learning we were pregnant once again! I'm grateful for the ups and downs we went through and for the renewed faith and hope that came from them.

I'm looking forward to 2013 and pray that it brings as much joy and happiness that we experienced this year. Happy New Year to you all!

{ favorite thing holiday swap! }

2012-12-17T21:56:00.002-07:00

Oh Jennifer, how you spoiled me!

Seriously friends, she went above and beyond!

Truth be told, I got her package before I sent mine out (I blame my tardiness on being sick!) She sent my goodies in a super cute, perfectly sized Christmas box, which isn't shown here... because I used it to mail her package in!

Way to recycle, right? HA! Honestly, the day I got her package I was trying to fit my stuff into a flimsy ol' box, worrying about it breaking and bending, and her box was so festive and sturdy and perfect, so I used it!

Jennifer was so creative with her gifts! Everything was packaged sooo cute - especially the way she addressed it!

She filled the box with glittery, mini ornaments, mini candy canes, and delicious peppermint Ghirardelli squares (those went fast!) Among all the fun, festive things she sent, she also included a little book for my baby boy! How thoughtful!

Thank you, thank you, thank you! I love it all!

Who else has received their swap packages? If you haven't sent yours yet, you still have time! Better late than never, right? Merry Christmas everyone!

{ pregnancy diary: week 29 }

2012-12-17T21:31:00.001-07:00

Sorry folks- I really need to get back into the habit of blogging regularly! Here's a little catch up on my pregnancy...

- I had my glucose test a couple of weeks ago. I passed (yay!) and it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. It just reminded me of a melted orange otter pop. Getting to the right place I was supposed to test at was a little more frustrating. In the end, everything worked out, but I realized I'll be delivering at a totally different hospital than I thought! A little further from home, but I'm okay with it.

- Since I'm O- blood type, I also had my Rhogam shot. Ouch!

- I still crave cheese and milk like crazy - no calcium shortage here! Andrew's family had their annual Christmas party at a nice country club and there was a huge, glorious, cheese platter out during social hour. Thankfully, they kept it out during dinner and after - I'm pretty sure I ate half the round of brie! Yummy!

- Sadly, my immune system is shot the latter part of my pregnancy. I wasn't feeling well last week and after a trip to instacare (where they told me I was fine) I finally went to my normal doctor and found out I had strep throat, an ear infection, and a sinus infection. I'm thankful for amoxicillin & hope I don't get that sick again!

- I've been feeling the baby move more than ever and I love it! Even when he finds his way under my ribs, I'm grateful for feeling him move and it always makes me smile. It's so crazy seeing my stomach bounce and move around. The first time I saw it, I thought, "Wow...there really IS a baby in there! Ha!"

- We're still working on the nursery and I'm hoping to have a good chunk of it done before Christmas! So far we've got the walls painted & the changing table/hutch sanded.

- And last, we have a name! BUT, we're saving that announcement until this little guy is born! March 1st can't come soon enough!