heartTalk

this is where it ends…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Fri, 03 Sep 2010 00:24:00 +0000

i think it is kind of obvious that this blog is actually coming to an end. after 4 or was it 5 years, i think is time to put this blog to rest. as the saying goes, everything must comes to an end. however, this does not mean the end for me to blog.

the world is round, and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning

this is the ending of a beginning, the beginning of an ending is over my new blog A rumination of life. So, change your link folks.

I won’t close down this blog, it will always be here as long as blogger permit it existence. It is part of me, I’m part of it. Is who I am.

THE END

to the order of the night…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Sat, 28 Aug 2010 19:18:00 +0000

with a jolt, i awoke from my sleep. i must have fallen asleep for a few minutes and this is not good, waking up in the middle of the night. i searched for my handphone and with a touch the screen flicker to life. 1.20am. definitely not good! i need sleep. pulled my blanket over and closed my eyes, counting imaginary sheep jumping over the fence one by one.

10mins passed by, still counting. screwed it! i’m hungry anyway. switch on the light. opened my room’s door and tip toe down to the kitchen. grab a glass and poured myself a glass full of milk. stuff one chocolate cookies into my mouth while grabbing a few more and put it in the plate. i’m back to the room.

scrolled my ipod. Cocorosie, no. Fanfarlo, no. Seabear, no. Azure Ray, yes! picked up “the monk who sold his ferrari”…wait, i just finished this right before i slept. put down. picked up ‘eat, pray, love’. interesting! 26 pages after…i’m sleepy. off the light. pulled the blanket over me again.

20mins later. agrh! kcuf this shit! tip toe down again. switch on the laptop. grab my towel. hot shower. done. wait for hair to dry. hmm…let’s blog about this. is 3.14am at the time of writing.

desperately need to grab a few eyes shut. need to wake up at 6.30am. 7am church. is early. i know. insane! on a sunday morning! INSANE!

i wish i have sleeping pills :(

memories of a film…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 14:27:00 +0000

Pardon me MIA-ing for so long from my blog. Assignments is pawning me at the moment. But, I did have a few moments of break away from my studies. Hanging out with my friends at Sepang Gold Coast, a buffet dinner at tao’s, clubbing night at G6 and tao’s lounge bar and several yam cha sessions.

anyway, here is the pic from gold coast using my golden half, Chelsea Maika…

in my hostel…

and this is a few pic from my smena 8m…

* click on the pics for bigger size*

july come and take this heart away…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 22:50:00 +0000

is 6.11am at the time of posting and i just woke up from a long night sleep. (slept at 9pm) is absolutely fantastic. it has been ages that i can sleep through all night long. i really can’t remember when was the last time i actually slept at night especially at a time in between 10pm-3am. this is an epic moment, i telling you. i guess my body finally give in to all the long hours that i spend for the past few months. then, with the assignments that i was rushing for the past few days have totally worn me out.

i have never been so tired ever since i came here. the only time i feel like this was back in between 2008-2009 where i was juggling between work and college both full time. yes, full time! thinking back, i was quite amazed by myself that i managed to pull it off. but it does comes with a price though, my health was compromise and deteriorate. i was calling in for sick every month. everyday, just slept for 3-4 hours. i looked like something that come out from a low budget hollywood zombie movie.

anyhow, right now i still have 5 assignments that due on next friday and 2 test on next week. week 11 is a cursed week. i am really wondering how am i going to pull through next week. still, i believe next saturday i will look back and look what i have gone through and ask myself what happened between here and there.

like it or not, time comes and goes and we are like the mice on the wheel that keep on running until one day we collapse and our presence forever gone. our existence will be so minuscule that it is not worth to be remembered. unless, you are like martin luther king, napolean bonaparte or qin shi huang. we are all the victim of time.

so, seize the day my fellow folks. carpe diem as the captain said…

Chelsea Maika…how can i ever stop loving you?

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 19:22:00 +0000

Yes, i am in love with a girl. So much for being gay. Oh well, life is unpredictable anyway.

Ladies and gentlemen, let me show you my love.

Golden Half Chelsea Maika (special edition)

My third lomo camera.

This camera is way smaller than I had imagine! Very very small that it fit perfectly in my pocket. I guess I shall call it ‘a pocket full of surprises’. Way smaller than my Smena 8m, and White Slim Angel. Woot! Can’t wait to finish up the roll of films to see how the pics turn out.

I shall let the pics do the talking.

say cheese!

ARGHHHHH!!!!!!

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 20:31:00 +0000

*a lot of swearing ahead. you had been warned*

I need a hit man! Seriously! I need to fucking kill someone!!!! I am so fucking ~~angry~~ furious! By now, my friends should know what happened cause I have been ranting in my facebook account until someone left a comment that she is going to detach my ‘caps lock’. Lol!!!!

I am not going into details right now. But seriously, this is the first time I met a guy that is so so so! wimpy and weak!!!! I know is hard to go through a break up but this is so fucking over! The world would be better off if he dies! At least in my world! Because I have been the collateral damage of his break up! DAMN WTF!!!!!! Every night I have to hear all his nonsense for the past 1 month!!!! Keep asking me for advice yet at the end all is vain when he still being stubborn like a mule! Go fuck yourself can? Why come seek for my advice everyday when you don’t want to listen? And stop asking me why and how!!!

The answer is simple she dumped you cause she no longer sees any hopes in the relationship! Move on!!!!!

DUDE!!!! She already DUMPED you like a fucking trash! Why do you still want to bother about her?!?! Don’t give me the shit, when you love someone you shouldn’t give up hopes so easily! C’mon!!!! When you have no ideas when is your final, when is your presentation, when is your due date for assignments it shows that something is fucking wrong with you already! Your life have been revolving around her so much that you lost yourself. Is that what you want? Is that what love is all about? When you gave up so many things and sacrificed so much for her yet she don’t appreciate it! You are like a moon circling the earth totally ignoring your life and the world behind you.

You are holding on to a burning charcoal!

You want to jump? Fine go ahead!!!! I don’t fucking care anymore! I have done all I can. Ultimately is your choice. Is your life, you choose to live or die is completely up to you. Honestly, I don’t think you have the gut to do so. Killing yourself need a lot of courage than you think and seeing you like this such a pansy wimpy person. Nah! I doubted it.

And that girl is a FUCKING BITCH also!!!

What you want BITCH!!!! If you don’t want to be with him anymore just firmly said NO!!!!! Just fucking kills his hopes!!!!

Don’t when he chase you back you told him you still love him. Then the next day told him, I don’t want you anymore.

Don’t tell him to take care of himself or send goodnight sms-es and tell him ‘my heart very pain see you like this’! The next day tell him don’t find you anymore!

Don’t hold his head when he finds you and told him that he is getting thinner and you feel bad! The next day completely ignored him!

Don’t fucking give him any false hopes!!!!!!!

AND don’t let me saw you cause I will so fucking scold/punch/slap/kick you! Because you have made my life suffered for the past one month with your nonsense and his nonsense! Enough is ENOUGH!

You two fucking go fuck yourself!

Don’t tell me! or ask me! I DON’T CARE ANYMORE!!!

NOW FUCK OFF!!!

so why don’t you feel my sorrow…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Thu, 24 Jun 2010 20:30:00 +0000

this song made my heart weep. i posted it before over and over again. but i guess this is like the song that i go to when i am really really down.

My all time favourite indie singer.

So why do you fill my sorrow
With the words you've borrowed
From the only place you've know
And why do you sing Hallelujah
If it means nothing to you
Why do you sing with me at all?

back to number one…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 20:00:00 +0000

by now most of my facebook friends probably know that i am so gaga over this song. i have been posting it over and over. it is so good! so sexy! so sensual! so erotic! the perfect song to…cough…you know…cough.

Straight to…Number One by Touch and Go

Kiss me on the lips
Run your fingers through my hair
Touch me

eating up the grey…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Sun, 20 Jun 2010 21:51:00 +0000

i am swarmed with my assignments at the moment. thus, explaining my absent from this blog and my music blog. 6 assignments due in 3 weeks time so bear with me ok. probably after that all will resume back to normal mode or maybe not considering that exam is approaching too.

anyway, i am not doing quite well recently. a lot of negativity, one thing leads to another like a snow ball on roll. there was this constant distant feeling that i always failed to put a word on it to explain how i felt. and things get worse when i listened to a few emo songs. so i turn to seek something that i had long gave up 2 years ago.

i lit the lighter and puff a few before i inhale the grey. puffing it out again as if like it carries my problem with it, gone with the wind. this smoky taste it felt distant yet so close. nostalgia. it always reminds me a piece of memory that i had long locked away as like it was some sort of time machine that brings me back to that spot, where the little red balloon slipped away from my hand. it reminds me of all the enya songs that we listened, while we chatted for whole night. it was a peaceful night with light breeze while you sat right beside me. i can never forget that moment.

perhaps, everything has to end sometimes.

When the love you had has shut the door
and left you standing on the other side
the photographs are peeling off the walls
i'm in the headlights of a car crash site

the reason why…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 15:50:00 +0000

i am not blogging is because i am busy with…

a) American Dramas!!! Queer as Folk, Boston Legal, Sex and the City, The L Word, Grey’s Anatomy and Glee, The Vampire Diaries, Fringe, Desperate Housewives and Gossip Girls. Anyway, Grey’s Anatomy finale rocks! Almost have a cardiac arrest. Sigh, now that all fall dramas were officially over i will be so bored now.

b) Movies, watched a handful of foreign movies. Diarios de motocicleta (The Motorcycle Diaries, Spanish ) Párpados Azules ( Blue Eyelids, Mexican ), Le.Pacte.des.Loups ( Brotherhood of the Wolf, French ), Nuovo cinema Paradiso ( New Paradise Cinema, Italian), El secreto de sus ojos ( Secret in Their Eyes, Argentina) A Single Man, The Messenger, Across the Universe, Into the Wild and Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind.

Nuovo cinema Paradiso is such a classic. A Single Man is like watching a poem, stunningly beautiful. Across the Universe is fun to watch especially when you know a lot of Beatles' songs. El secreto de sus ojos is emotional. Párpados Azules is loneliness. Diarios de motocicleta is humane. Le.Pacte.des.Loups is intrigue. Perhaps, I should write a post about all this movies. Is really good.

c) I was sick. My voice was so squeaky at some point for few days.

d) I was kinda swarmed with a friend of mine that I just know him for about a week. Well, he just broke up with his girlfriend and he is a cutter. No kidding. I kinda freak out when I found out, especially the scars on his arm. Kinda worry so just try my best to talk some sense into him for this few days. Long hours chat, night till morning.

e) I am lazy.

fades in vain…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Tue, 25 May 2010 20:16:00 +0000

i lost my blog mojo. that’s why i haven’t been able to update my blog for the past many weeks. plus, nothing much to write anyway. just the usual stuff. university life, assignment, studies…etc. my life have been pretty much a patch of grey now, dull and boring. not so rainbow-ish. seriously, i need something to spice up my life.

anyway, recently i found myself kinda obsess with my weight and the ‘baby bump’ that i have, been so eager to lose it. hitting the university gym everyday for the past 2 weeks and yet i still haven’t lose a friggin pound. perhaps, i should cut down on my supper which is something that is really hard to do for me. i am a person that survive on supper :S

though, i haven’t been updating my blog for the past few weeks (the last post didn’t count) I do however manage to update my music blog consistently. well for one thing, music is crucial for my survival and is easier to write an album then a human’s life. so, few days ago i wrote a post about Balmorhea which end up being read by someone from Western Vinyl an independent record label that signed Balmorehea and other artist. and they send me an email the next day with a legit download link of another artist from them, Slow Six.

though the email did not ask me to write any kind of review for that album but i seriously think it was the reason why they send me the album hoping that i could write something about the album in my music blog. cause it doesn’t make sense for someone to send a legit download link for free download, provided that it cost you to buy or legally download it.

so yeap, i am very happy even though i may be given much thought in this matter but just let me ‘siok sendiri’ awhile ok. and that is a really good instrumental album though it is epically freaking long album, only 7 tracks but suck out 51.5minutes of your life just listening to that 7 tracks. and no i can’t post the download link at all, not that i don’t want to share with you guys is just that the download link only can be used by one person a.k.a me. i don’t know how they did it but the download link only works for me. i know cause i send the link to my friend and it shows him that the link has expired but when i access it, it still works fine for me. ngek ngek ngek…shall cross my finger that in future still have this kind of kindness from western vinyl.

and seriously, i really should stop downloading so many albums. i have still a lot of albums that i haven’t even listen to, and those albums had been downloaded ages ago. i need to finish listening all those albums before adding up new ones. but discovering new music everyday is what keeps me going.

secret…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Wed, 19 May 2010 21:50:00 +0000

i wish i can trust you and tell you everything…

sadly, i can’t and this bottled up feeling is consuming me inside out...

i hope you understand and all i do is hope…

life has been harsh…

i am still learning how to deal with it…

i am writing it over here because i know you won’t be able to read it…

because you are not suppose to know it until the time is right…

but it will be no such thing as right time…

love is being overused but never overrated…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Tue, 04 May 2010 21:11:00 +0000

it sometimes baffles me when i heard some people saying that love is being overrated. how can love be overrated? love is never overrated, is just the word being overused, abusively. often people said it without really mean it. or those who always rush into an relationship and this is getting cliché. or for those who thinks that relationship is nothing but a must to spice up ones life so they just keep on changing so-called-lover one after one. of course at the end of the days, it does seems meaningless when you keep on failing in a relationship but that is your problem for never try to understand love. so you claim that love is overrated? c’mon, tell you one thing, stop fucking around and for once think with your head and mind you the big one, not the small one. and the thing that is being overrated here is your intelligence. obviously, this part was directed to someone i know that pissed me off in a conversation over the phone.

how can one even said that. i admit love dies, the butterfly in your stomach dies but those feeling shall never be overrated. the feeling is still in fact very raw and real that it makes you have butterfly, it makes you miss someone one so much that you can’t sleep or eat. those feelings are very much real.

war is still happening and they said love is overrated. discrimination still exist and love is overrated? hatred still exist and yet love is overrated? people are dropping like flies around the world and yet love is overrated? when people being killed for the lack of understanding, for the reason of religion, indifference, sexuality and etc and yet love is overrated? i so wanna slap them in their face.

love is a strong word and so does hate. in my honest opinion the opposite of love is not hate. for a moment there it does seems rational to conclude that hate is the opposite because well linguistic speaking it does makes sense. up down, left right etc….it does makes sense but bear in mind feeling is not physical. is not something you can see or touch. you can only feel it. hatred does not exist without the existing of love. to hate someone you have to love someone. thus when you hate someone the love still exist. hatred only exist with the pre-requisite of love.

for me the opposite of love is apathy/ignore. when you no longer love someone you wouldn’t care for him or for her right? of course this only applied if you are not a believer that after a breakup still could be friend. nope sorry, i don’t believe in that. so yeah, for me it often ended up that i delete everything that related to them email, hp number etc…because i no longer care what happen to them. the love had withered, the butterfly had dies. it was nothingness. no hate no nothing. the only thing is to give your best wishes and that’s it. it all shall be a piece of memory.

the word love itself had been overused. people often said it without really means it. because it does seems like the right thing to do when you are in a relationship. but what if the relationship is something that both parties do not really have a mutual understanding? those that only get involve because it seems like the right thing to do after they hooked up. (for some gay couples) as for the straight, well i know a friend of mine that keep changing girlfriends one after another one. well he claimed that without girlfriend he can’t studies, life would be so boring. and then after every relationship ends he would told me love is overrated. geez! oh so you get involve is because you are bored and whatsoever lame excuses that you come out with not because you really love that person. hey newsflash, liking someone and loving someone is different and this is getting cliché too. so don’t you blame love when the relationship that you build on does not even depends on love as a foundation. and next time don’t bother me with your problems when the problems itself can be avoided at the beginning.

bah! i can’t never understand these people.

i don’t want to be alone anymore…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Sun, 02 May 2010 17:46:00 +0000

this immense emotion is beyond my capabilities to handle. to describe it as sadness is an understatement. nuf said.

The Twilight Saga:Eclipse

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 20:10:00 +0000

Ok, here is the new trailer of The Twilight Saga: Eclipse. This is way better than the previous trailer. Way way better…the previous one was boring and did not shows anything at all. This however is a whole different story. Enjoy folks, the new Eclipse trailer from the series of Twilight Saga.

recently…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 21:52:00 +0000

well, let see what i have been doing for the past 2 days since i touched down back in my hometown. yes touched down, my hometown is somewhere in the thick rainforest of sarawak. house on top of the tree where the hornbills practically just our pets, monkeys stealing our foods, the wild boars roaming the land below. having sago worms for extra protein. fat and juicy :P

this is sibu. we have evolved not longer living on trees.

ok, fine all that mentioned above was pure fictional and whatsoever that happens related to the living and the death is pure coincidence. but i’m not kidding about the fat and juicy sago worms. some natives here do eat that, i once want to try it but my mom forbid me. T_T come to think of it. i should throw tantrum and scream ‘i wanna, i wanna’ few years back ago. that would be one helluva experience that i want to have. i wonder how it taste like.

fat and juicy. not that i have eaten before but it does seems so.

anyway, i have been having secret recipe’s cakes for the past two days. yeah, cappuccino cheese cake on the 1st day, choco mud cake on the 2nd day, and today (is 4.53am now) i’m going there again with my friends. well, can’t help since secret recipe just opened their 1st outlet in my hometown (i know we are a land lost in time) and my house just nearby so cream, sugar and fat all the way.

oh and have been going out yamcha-ing with my friends but that is common so nothing to shout about. next!

i changed a new layout. love this one much more better. simple and clean. i guess i’m a minimalist by heart after all. oh there was two columns that i think you guys should check it out, heartGood and heartLaugh. all the website under that two tabs were really good and i think you guys should check it out. personally, i love those site under heartGood, like listverse, madhaiku, onesentence, little ghost…etc. some of the site do not have rss feeds so they may end up at the bottom of the tab but they do update frequently. so is not a dead site. go on hop-on and enjoy. (i know the name are cheesy what heartXXX but i’m lack of creativity and all those nonsense, i’m as queer as *straight, erm…~~folk~~? nope don’t think so. aiya whatever lar…*in creativity)

i wanna watch this movie!

oh did i mention i have been sleeping in my parents room. yeah, i don’t like my own room at all. i have been dying wanting to redecorate it but i’m just such a lazy bum. so since i only hit the sack around 6-ish in the morning which is a good timing since my parents woke up around 5-ish. walah, i can hog the king size bed and switch on the air-cond to full blast and hid myself under the thick comforter, so cozy can die :D

i am also re-watching all those american series that i own. grey’s anatomy, gilmore girls, heroes, glee…but very soon i’m gonna have new series add to my 1tera hd right after i get my 320gb hd from my friend. going to add in the remaining seasons of boston legal and secret diaries of a call girl. and also some series that she have been raving for days, l word and the coyote ugly. oh and the whole series of sex and the city and friends which both i stopped watching after a few seasons. am also waiting for my sis as she have the collection for csi. wahahahaha! english series to the max. right now, i’m downloading one tree hill as i really misses that show. planning to download ugly betty and desperate housewives too. i want to have a collection of those series that i like. speaking of ugly betty i’m sad the show finally comes to an end. though the ending was good enough i’m so going to miss betty suarez and her braces and her hideous poncho not to mention marc and amanda with all their craziness and bitchiness and silliness and kindness. *snif*

this show is a classic. no really had been ranked by time.com as the best top 100 shows of all time. ranked way higher than lost. lost is at 96/97, gilmore is around 30/31-ish.

oh btw, i think is time gossip girl should be axed. totally not worth to download anymore. the script is a mess right now. they practically just sleep around with every one of them, not to mention they are all friends. GROSS! besides, where is georgina? tell, jesus the bitch is back. i guess jesus had thrown her to hell. and eric new boyfriend is nothing but yuck! and jenny is annoying. dan is getting wtf every single time he shows up. chuck and blair is getting boring, though they are the perfect couple in the whole series. spartacus is all about blood and ~~sex~~ porn. oh well, like how i post in my fb status few days ago…

betty is gone, glee is back, lost is lost, gossip is haywire, anatomy is mediocre, vampire is interesting, fringe is boring, housewives is desperate, now what...

to impress or to express…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Wed, 21 Apr 2010 19:10:00 +0000

I was having an epiphany the other day. The thought of why some people thinks that fashion is superficial or meaningless as it defy the morality of humanity that teaches us one should not judge one by cover. (ok, perhaps not humanity)

You see, fashion is subjective some may like it some may not. Same goes with arts. Different people have different perception of what they saw in a drawing or sculpture. For me fashion is also a form of art. It is a way of how the designer try to express their ideas and creativities. That’s why some of the fashion on the T-stage is out of the world.

For me, one should dress to express not impress. Of course, many of us actually were somewhere in between of expressing and impressing, me included. But, what I don’t like is those people who overly covered with branded stuff. As if like wanting to impress desperately. For them high end brand means fashion. However, those brand do not define who you are. It did not help to express who you are. Ok perhaps it scream ‘I’m rich but I got no taste’. I’m not saying high end is crap. What I want to say is one should mix and match with a hint of something that represent you. To portray your personality, to spice things up.

I for once actually don’t really like stuff that have their brands all over. That is why I don’t like Louis Vuitton(LV). I do think it was overrated. What they did was just print the brand all over and tadah…all those so called ‘fashionista’ will gaga over it. Oh, and I also don’t like the Armani Exchange belt. You know the one with the big-ass AX logo. For me, I prefer they just tag the brand name inside the clothes or perhaps just a small logo that would be fine. You don’t have to show to the whole world what brand you are wearing ok.

Gotta love the bite…

And what with queer with branded stuff. I don’t get it. I once met a gay guy in his late 30s. From head to toes all branded stuff, Prada, CK…etc. (can’t be bother to care about the brands). Ya, is really impressive. But, later on I found out he actually need to use public transports to travel and still living with his mother, the house that his parents bought. Oh, those are genuine stuff. Not those petaling street bargain stuff. Come on, what for with all the branded stuff while you actually can’t even afford a car. High-end doesn’t match with public transports ok. And you don’t have to cover with high-end brand to impress people. You just end up becoming a laughing stock for someone that do not acquire fashion sense at all. Trying to impress people much. PHAIL!

Of course, when I said dress to express, I am not asking you to dress like Lady Gaga with her over-the-top attire. Though, she was one good example for someone who dress to express not impress. Her fashion actually has some meaning in it. Like the one Kermit the frog or the one she wore when she met Queen Elizabeth. Which she trying to make a statement that wearing real fur is animal cruelty. Of course, not many of us actually get the meaning of it. What we have was ‘what the hell was she thinking’?

That my friends is why I said fashion is a form of art. A way for the artist to express and create a rumination of thought as it is provocative. Perhaps, we are all too common to understand some of the great works by some famous artists. Take The Snail by Henri Matisse one of the founder of fauvism.

did i just heard someone scream ‘you called this art’?

Dress comfortably, smartly and accordingly and most important of all dress up to your standard. Cover yourself with high-end brand while you actually can’t even afford a decent lifestyle is impressive. Yes, it does but mostly people will be impressed by your stupidity. Wear something that spell you, in a good way. Not by wearing something that actually flash ‘i’m a nut-job’ like donning a knitted scarf under the hot sun. Is fine is you want to don a scarf but a blardy closely-knitted scarf!? Someone please bring me a cup of ~~cold~~ icy water!

As the saying goes…

Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like. as quoted by Will Smith

smoking hot!

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Sat, 17 Apr 2010 22:54:00 +0000

No Kidding! I just got a newly released album, a collaboration between James Morrison and The Idea of North. It is so new that even Last.fm doesn’t has any data at all. :D Ok, fine this is the first time they come out with an album together so is normal that last.fm has no data at all. But just let me siok sendiri can or not. Oh and this is a jazz album. Oh yeah! I’m ecstatic!

It does feel like spring. So much love in the air right now.

Oh I updated my music blog. So go check it out ok, is been so long since I last updated it. Well, I’m still in the exam period and since is a weekend I guess I probably should just try to update it and it took me 2 hours to write that post on Maximilian Hecker. I actually wanna to write more but lazy-bug bite me.

Anyway, I shall hit the sack. I just wanted to show my excitement. Two more days and I shall be FREE!

p/s: is kinda nice having the whole floor by myself cause everyone has went back home already since majority of them already finished their exam. peacefulness is a bliss is all i can said.

Another quickie…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 21:00:00 +0000

Just to show you what albums I have been listening to while I’m studying this few days. Yes, I need music to help me study. If no music I can’t concentrate at all. Most are by albums, some are few songs from the album.

Who You Are by Cary Brothers

Comme si de rien n'était by Carla Bruni

Magic chairs by Efterklang

Sea Priest by Fire! Santa Rosa, Fire!

Similes by Eluvium

The Magician's Private Library by Holly Miranda

Les Chemins De Verre by Karkwa

Les tremblements s'immobilisent by Karkwa

Le Volume Du Vent by Karkwa

Dead Waves by Kyte

Septembre Et Ses Dernières Pensées by Les Discrets

Youth Novels by Lykke Li

Controle by Malajube

Trompe-l'oeil by Malajube

I Am Nothing But Emotion, No Human Being, No Son, Never Again Son

Maximilian Hecker

No Ghostless Place by Raised By Swans

The Lady Boy Tapes by The Paddingtons

Kiss The Sun by Detroit Social Club

Swim For The Trees by The Owens

The Alphabet of Hurricanes by Tom McRae

Sunshine And Other Misfortunes by The Candle Thieves

and

course

Elephants...Teeth Sinking Into Heart by Rachael Yamagata

9 by Damien Rice

O by Damien Rice

Spotted any albums that you knew?

Laughing With…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Sun, 11 Apr 2010 18:46:00 +0000

God just made a fun out of me today. Why on earth out of so many days, today I have a migraine attack and a gastric that follow suit. This suck to the max! I was supposed to follow my study plan but bam…shit happens. I have a freaking week ahead of me. And this totally messed up with my plan. Damage control is needed. DESPERATELY!

I really do have the urge to do this.

I don’t even know what I have studies for the past few hours as my head still hurt and my stomach is feeling really weird. I guess most probably I have gastric is because I didn’t have my lunch this afternoon. Well, can’t be bother ain’t I when I knew that for sure I’m going to vomit as when I’m having migraine attack. End up vomiting Bile, stomach acid the yellow bitter stuff. That’s when I start to have gastric. Freaking unbelievable!

Seriously, I really wish that I can go for the procedure where they put something inside your heart to cure migraine. Migraine is a bitch! Period! Medication do no shit for me. The most is just sleeping pills to help me sleep while having migraine and not many doctors will actually prescribe it. FTS. Those who never ever have it should really count it as a blessing. I have no idea why I’m the only one in my family that suffered from it. FML.

For whole day, I can only think of the song, Laughing With by Regina Spektor. You have to listen to the song then only you can understand why I use it as my title.

i’m hot…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 21:06:00 +0000

yes, i’m freaking hot! hot as in the weather is super hot. not the i’m damn sexy with six pack hot geddit. the weather had been unbelievable hot this few days. i was actually typing this post while waiting for my hair to dry up at 4.40am. just finished shower and this is actually the fourth shower i have tonight. one at 8pm, then 9pm then 12pm then just now 4 something in the morning.

seriously, someone shoot down the sun!

i’m desperate in need of air-con. this kind of weather is driving me nuts. i can’t stand to have those sticky feeling on my body. ugh! so uncomfortable. and it totally ruined my mood to study as i get very cranky and irritated. not to mention, i bought the wrong tea! argh!!!!! why the hell the packaging of st.dalfour english breakfast tea and earl grey so much look alike! darn! i totally don’t like earl grey at all. the smell of it already made me feel nausea. yes, i kid you not. i really feel like want to vomit the moment when i ripped open the envelope as the smell of the bergamot sting my nose. why they want to mix the bergamot orange with tea leaves? nice meh?

tell me what i’m going to do with the rest 24 envelopes? i already have a abundant of peppermint tea that i bought a year ago that i didn’t touched at all after i drank once. i bought it out of curiosity so can’t blame anyone. ugh! such a waste. now i’m going to have another tea that will be left untouched for god-knows-how-long. hmm…perhaps i should bring back for my sis. hopes she like it since she is a tea lover. now, i’m stuck with lipton and a few packets left of st.dalfour lemon tea. i want my english breakfast!!!! lipton tend to leave a kind of aftertaste in your mouth after you drink it.

i need my caffeine boost. i still have my coffee but drinking excessive of coffee makes me way too hyper sometimes. can’t concentrate at all. plus, is heaty and that’s the least i want considering the freakish hot weather now.

ok, my hair is dry enough. off to bed. don’t think there will be any updates in this coming week. exam exam exam…

a litte bit of anything…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Mon, 05 Apr 2010 20:07:00 +0000

blogging in the dark is kinda fun actually. i was supposed to be in bed but i can’t sleep. my insomnia is back which is really bad because i need all my focus/energy/rest for the upcoming exam on next week. which would be a hell for me, because i’m having exam five days continuously (the one day break in between doesn't count when the subject after that day is extremely hard…lalala)

i guess most residents probably already fast asleep by this time, only left me this nocturnal animal that still sitting right in front of this laptop trying to blog a post at this ungodly hour. i guess whoever who walk past my room right now would most probably get a shock of his life. but i doubt that. all already snoozing in the lala land.

the thing about having many songs in your laptop library is that sometimes you would bound to stumble upon a few songs that you shrugged it off the 1st time you listen to it and it turn out to be a really good album when you actually did really listen to in. just realized i typed a whole sentence without any coma or fullstop. bah don’t care. who cares about punctuation in this wee hours? ok, this is getting further away from my topic and extremely random. well, months ago i downloaded this album from a China’s artist out for fun. XD and only right now while typing i give it a go. and it turns out very good. haiz…why i always have such good taste in music? LOL! amboi tak malu kan i. *mental note: need to have self-censorship*

白水.雨来

oh, this few days i have given a lot of deep ~~throat~~ thought. (sorry, imma a bit blur now XD) popping out quite a lot of my own so called life philosophy quotes and this one i think is one of my most wicked by far “To be appreciated. You either have to end up being really beautiful or really ugly because both end up being unique.” wakakaka! true right! if you are so sickening ugly you also will appreciated like the doggie below which won the world most ugliest dog award. the irony of life. or if you want something that is deep ~~throat~~ *and the song of britney spears, ‘opps…i did it again’ pop out of nowhere. my imagination amazed me sometimes* thought here is one quote “Everyone knows how to die yet not everyone knows how to live.” sad yet true right.

ain’t i such a ~~cutie~~ uglie…RAWR! btw… “Rawr” means i love you in monster way.

oh and also a question that been keep floating around in my brain juice, ‘this world is a balanced place. everything has an opposed. male=female. dark=light. good=evil. straight=gay :p. so the question is, can god still exist if god destroy satan as how it stated in the book of revelation? since everything in this world need to has an opposed to balance it out and to exist as they are like a symbiosis relationship that need to depends on each other to co-exist. anyone cares to answer? cause i’m still wondering pondering….

p/s: gosh i think this is the most crappiest post i ever wrote since i started blogging eons years ago…XD

kill me if i’m deaf…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Sat, 03 Apr 2010 20:13:00 +0000

Seriously, if one day i’m deaf. I will be better off if i just drop dead. A self-proclaim music freak that can’t live without music at all. Thus, resulting a spin off of music blog, Melomane. If can I want to listen to all music in this world, well except gothic rock, heavy metal that sort of genres. I live to hear music. Secretly, I want to have a personal collections of music of all sort. Sometimes, when my friends ask me for a certain song or singer I will ask them to wait awhile for me to search in my itunes library. Haha, I like to think my itunes library as a music search engines. Yet, the ironic is that over 80% of music that I listen to is not popular in Malaysia. For one I don’t like Mariah Carey, Christina Aguilera…you know those popular Divas. But, I do like Lady Gaga. Ngek Ngek Ngek. I do think she is awesome. The Fame Monster is awesome, lyrical wise almost all the songs in this album have a deep meaning.

Anyhow, based on the stats in my Last.fm account that I sign up on January 19th 2010. So far I have played a total of 16,509 times of songs. Meaning in a total of 76 days, on average I listen to 217 tracks of songs per day. If the average play time for a song is 3.5mins then I would spend 12hrs6mins per day for listening to music. Amazing huh. Right now, I only have a collection of 5756songs in my library. That is 1239 albums or 771 artists in total. If you want to listen from the 1st track to the last track in my library you need to spend 16days non-stop, only then you will able to finish it up. Honestly speaking, 5756 tracks of song is kinda few. I need to expand my library more. Any good intro? But then I don’t listen to K-pop or J-pop. The most genres I listen to is Indie which in my opinion I do think is the best genres in music world. :P Do add me in last.fm if you happen to have an account too.

Yet another useless want

Still I want this but only if it is 64GB

This few days has been listening to Jónsi, Maximilian Hecker, The Candles Thieves, Isbells, Kyte, MGMT and Rufus Wainwright. Jónsi I already wrote a post over my music blog which I think his album will probably be one of the best album for 2010. I think the next post would be Maximilian Hecker because he is just that amazing. His latest album, I’am nothing but Emotion, No Human Being, No Son, Never Again Son (yes is a mouthful) is nothing short but amazing. This album is honest, dept and pure. Close to his heart I guess. Ok, I should stop before this end up being my music blog.

Anyway, this is Go Quiet by Jónsi which I was suppose to post in Melomane but end up here (long story). His voice, oh his voice! Like a voice from heaven. Hop over to my music blog if you wanna know more about this album.

jónsi - "go quiet" from Jónsi on Vimeo.

You are bore when…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 19:21:00 +0000

You know when you used to be a student

you tend to scribble something on the table when the lesson is really boring.

Well, my friend and I did that few weeks ago.

Someone scribbled the word ‘Baby!’ before our class.

So my itchy hand go and scribbled down ‘should use condom’.

And my friend go and add in ‘No. Cox i cant reach the satisfaction’.

I wonder did the original artist saw what we did to his masterpiece? :P

This day is hard to come by…

noreply@blogger.com (jun) — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 17:59:00 +0000

way outdated picture...

I just realize I haven’t been writing anything for the past 1 week for my blog. I only manage to post up a post in Melomane yesterday. What a week eh. Well, just the usual, tests and assignments. Well, what more can you expect from a student life apart from constantly ranting about exams and assignments?

Anyway, I spend my Saturday at Midvalley. Ok, not really though. I just went straight to MPH and bought two books then straight away went to the starbucks at the garden as I was meeting someone over for a coffee. Just a casual date? or hang out? I’m not sure really. Date seems to be overrated, though. One thing about me is that usually I’m quite talkative in MSN however when in real I’m not much a talkative person if meeting with someone I barely knew. I guess I only be more comfortable when I get to know that person well enough. So, yeah you pretty much can guess how’s the date/hang out went. But still I think I enjoyed it. Just casual nothing more nothing less.

How come most queer that I know didn’t have a date like this? Mostly, just meet up pretending having a dinner or worst still just straight away end up in bed then tadah declare I’m in a relationship then 2 weeks later another emo status appear in facebook. Bah. RIDICULOUS! They totally deserved it anyway, for so fast jumping into a relationship before knowing the other half first. Like how I told my extremely gay friendly female friend. Oh my let’s not get into the details just say it end up having a lot of freaking funny and dirty jokes between me and her.

Anyhow, the point of this post is…wait what’s the point of this post? Bah, I absolutely have no idea. I guess I’m just posting for the sake of posting. Go ahead sue me.

Here’s a quote before I end this post. The most amazing and clever and funniest quote I ever seen; “Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard.” Is this not brilliant or what! Heck, there’s even a facebook page for this quote.