'The Saga Begins'

"They say it's your birthday, We're gonna have a good time!"

2012-10-26T09:24:00.000+01:00

So it's the official close to the current blog title - in around 2 hours I officially turn 30 : s

I have to say the last year has gone really quickly and definitely since I started writing this blog earlier in the year.

So what have I learnt on the lead up to this milestone age:

- That it is not possible to do everything before your 30
- That I can still achieve goals and do new stuff (however big or small) if I am open to chances
- That I still need to improve my work/life balance and give more time to my family/friends
- That I'm not old, I'm just older
- That I become happier with myself, the more I make my life my own
- That I missed my writing and drawing and I shouldn't have put them on the back burner
- That I can be a creative all-rounder and get on in this industry without always being typecasted
- That I really want a job as a Copywriter/Creative, where I can put my array of skills to the test.
- That I really want to learn how to drive (as I feel I have been left behind on that one)
- That life is for the living, so LIVE IT!

So how am I currently feeling? Weird and pre-occupied. I just had a shower and when I got out to see my 30 year old body, I definitely thought "Tone up luv" lol.

I think back to how my 20s started. So young, so new to the industry I have now worked in for just over 11 years. At that age I thought I wanted to be married with kids by my mid-late twenties (and then realised that wasn't what I wanted, I wanted all that to come when I was ready) and still had pipe dreams of performing again (I hate working nights all the time, so it's a good thing that this disappeared, lol). At that age I had only just found my love for clubbing, so I was doing it all the time, instead of for birthdays and to cheer my friends and I up after a bad week. Things were simpler then and life seemed less scary and I am sure the post I received was a lot more exciting than now : s

I don't dislike this age though, as I feel I am a lot more confident then when I left college, I know what I want from life most of the time and I may not be as skinny as I was 10 years ago, but apart from some more exercise, I think I can live with it.

So, as you can imagine, the title of this blog will change. For now, I can't think of a great title so it will be Route to Happiness (mainly because I will continuing going for all the things I want, whilst observing things en route) and I don't want it to be Route to Forty at the moment (one milestone at a time, lol). There are two reasons I want to carry on with this blog (which I wasn't sure would be the case initially). One, it is a great way to practise my writing in a creative way but two, I feel it pushes me to strive for things I want (I don't want to be writing a blog just for the sake of it, I want it to have purpose and meaning).

Well, I'm going to leave it at that for now, as it is my birthday and I don't want to be tied to the computer all day.

Love and hugs to all the fab people in my life and see you on the other side : s

Me at 19, a few months before my 20th birthday.

Post title from the fab four: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ztoSUhbNntQ

"Twenty-twenty-twenty four hours to go, I wanna be sedated"

2012-10-18T15:08:00.001+01:00

The other day at roller disco, I managed to slip up and fall on my coccyx. Not clever and definitely not that funny - it really hurt! Stupidly, I did know in the back of my head when I went that I was going to be doing a one week contract job starting less than 2 days later and a sore bum was not going to be ideal. Due to it being really short notice (and the fact I had to cancel another job recently because of my left knee playing up) I knew I had to go in.

Now asides from the job itself, one of the worst things about many of my roles, is the travel. I very rarely get offered a job really close to home, so I always land up travelling about an hour to 1 & 1/2 hrs. When your injured at all, this seems like longer.

Anyway, the thing that I noticed the most the other day was the lack of disability access. A few years ago at least, things to do with buildings and public places making changes to access was a big thing, yet in some places, not much has changed.

I have had problems with both my knees on and off for awhile and have also had my back lock in the past. On a bad day, lots of stairs plus crowded places is not a place I want to be and I have a lot less problems than some people.

It was only the other day when I went to work with my sore coccyx, that I noticed how bad the access was. First of all, the train station I went to only had stairs to get to the platform. So slowly I managed to get myself up them. When the train came, it was one where the train sits high above the platform, so I had to pull myself carefully up (way to big a gap really - also, no one mans this station, so no one to help). When I changed trains to the next station, I realised that this station too only had access via steep stairs - not only bad for people with walking problems but also for people with pushchairs/wheelchairs. After getting on and off my 2nd train, I realised at the final station not only do you have to use stairs to get up and down to the platforms, but you have more stairs to contend with at the front entrance.

Now the things I have looked at only regard walking impairments, but you don't tend to see things like Braille in stations for like the Oyster Card barriers or lower train announcement signs for those visually impaired (something which I know if I don't wear my glasses - which are meant for reading - I can't always see). It's awful to see that sometimes money is spent on stupid things in this country (don't even get me started with the giant boulder story the other day: http://www.standard.co.uk/news/london/a-meteor-storm-antiparking-boulders-which-cost-7000-spark-fury-8212824.html ), when there are so many people having problems living a normal life, be it because of disability access, housing, job hunting etc.

All I can do for myself is to try and keep as healthy as I can, so my problems do not get worse (my coccyx is doing fine now but I still need to work a lot on the knees). However, that doesn't mean I think the standards shouldn't change.

Here's hoping that 2013 brings a bit more luck and good change for us all, as I don't want to get sedated to get through it!

This helped the pain in my coccyx : )

Blog title comes from the awesome Ramones: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8FxaJKm9sdI

"No turning back, we're lost in music"

2012-10-15T11:20:00.002+01:00

Roller skating is a bit of a past time for me. I didn't do it a lot as a kid, but when I did I really enjoyed it.

I did not have conventional roller skates, I had the old skool ones which were basically wheels on a metal sole and you strapped your shoes into them. In some ways, really cool because you could wear nearly any of your shoes and trainers with them and they were adjustable in size, so if your foot grew bigger, you just got one of your parents to sort it out - it was great!

I think I mainly used roller skates when I was in primary school, because by the end of this and onwards, I was more likely to borrow a bike and going cycling round the area - something I was really good at then but have had to gain my nerve back when I tried it recently.

I did go to a roller disco thing at my school, but they didn't let us skate on the school hall (because it damaged their floor and it was more dangerous). Instead, we had a make shift floor made out of different coloured panels (hired from a company) that attached together, which you skated over. Does anyone remember these?

My memories of this roller disco were really good and I remember having lots of fun, so I have always wanted to go to a real adult roller disco. I also have loved the show Starlight Express since I was that age and have always wanted to be able to dance on skates : (

Well, the other day (after being unavailable to go at least 4 times before), I was swayed and went for a pal's hen do. Firstly, I didn't realise how expensive it was. I know you get the skates and all, but are the people running it taking the piss (would it be cheaper if I bought my own?)! As you can imagine from anything inspired by the 70s, there were lots of colourful lights and walls and a kind of "we're all friends here" feel to it.

Once you've paid, you put anything you don't need in the cloak room and then queue up for the skates. I had forgotten how different my skates were and found the weirdest thing to be how far the roller skate boots go up the leg - I found it really weird not having proper movement in my ankle : s

Anyway, it was the getting up in the skates that was the hardest. Having probably never been on wheels since the age of 13 (over 15 years ago), I found it hard getting my balance and the stance. To start with, I wouldn't even go on the main floor, because I was scared of falling over. Their was also a floor for more experienced skaters, but I knew from the start that was never going to happen, lol

In the end, I built up my courage and skated in the main area. I have to say, it was scary but it also felt like an achievement. It was slightly off putting seeing all those people who were experts doing their fancy moves, but I think it was just a bout of jealousy. I managed to do this at various points for the first hour (which was great), until I then fell over onto my coccyx and then lost my nerve again. The problem was I fell so hard, it really hurt and the last thing I felt like doing was skating around again.

For me, it was an interesting experience (which I am glad I did) but it's just not for me. Just like many others, I think my roller skating days should be left in the past, along with some of the tracks they played, lol.

Blog title comes from this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43qB9FpfCR8

"When the working week is done, Oh, girls just want to have fun..."

2012-10-08T22:16:00.002+01:00

I always thought that at some point I'd get too old for a sleepover, but there is nothing like a girly night in with friends : )

I remember having sleepovers when I was still reasonably young (as in between 11-14 years old) but honestly can't remember which friends of that time they were with. All I remember were things like staying up really late for that age (like 2am) and watching things like "God's Gift". If you never got the pleasure of seeing this program, it was a show for I'd say women in their 20s upwards, where men did sexy things to gain approval from the female audience members. It was kind of like a sluttier version of "Man-O-Man" hosted by Chris Tarrent in the 90s and played in prime time. It was basically a chance to giggle and joke at men with their tops off and then to go silent if you thought your parents were going to come downstairs.

My next memories of sleepovers were being 16-18years old, when it was all about daring friends, fake saonsis, watching horror films and talking about boys. These years had fond memories, as I started to make decent friends, who I could have a joke and a laugh with whilst growing up. One of the funniest memories from this was definitely when we made a pact that whoever fell asleep would be drawn on. We all tried so hard to stay up but then one of the other girls fell asleep. It seemed really funny at the time that we should draw on all her limbs where her pj's didn't cover. Shortly after we all fell asleep. In the early hours of the day (as in 7am ish) she woke up to find the drawings on her legs and arms. I can't quite remember if she screamed or just woke us up, but we were soon all laughing and giggling, even though we were so tired.

The years of 19-23, were mainly alcohol fuelled and there is probably many an occasion that I can't remember. However there is one night that always comes to mind. Ages ago I had the idea of Anti-Valentines day (or alternative, as I kind of call it now). It was the idea that anyone should have fun with friends, family or loved ones). On the first Anti-Valentine's day celebration, a group of us stayed at a friend of ours. It was a mixed group of girls and guys who were all friends and single and we listened to music, drunk alcohol and just had a laugh. One of our male mates feel asleep and the whole idea of drawing on his face was suggested. The other lads got in first, drawing on a moustache and I think colouring in his eyebrows - I think some of it was with biro : s Then us girls decided to add some eye shadow etc. We decided we wanted him to look like William Shakespeare. After finishing out master piece, we let him sleep and carried on having a laugh. When he finally woke, he was still quite tipsy and being an English Student, we asked him to recite his favourite shakespeare quotes and talk about the man. He was so hard to hold in the laughter, especially as the alcohol was well and truly in all our systems. Being the mean people we are, we even let him leave the house and get in a cab wearing all the make-up. We heard the next day that when he got home, he saw his face in the massive mirror that was in his parent's hallway and managed to wake up his family at silly o'clock. We also didn't realise he had a big interview the next day and I think he had trouble taking it all off before the meeting. Oops : s

The last big sleepover I had at mine was for my 25th birthday. I invited round about 8 people to celebrate getting older and being a quarter of a century. It was reasonably chilled watching films, chatting, drinking and eating. It was really cool and a nice way to catch up with everyone.

Between then and now, I hadn't been to a sleepover (other than crashing at people's houses when I'm too drunk or can't get home). Then a few days ago I went to a mate's house for one for her 29th birthday. There were 6 of us who all roughly knew each other and the night consisted of a board game, karaoke on the wii, one friend was painting peoples nails, drinking, chatting, eating and laughing. The thing I liked about it the most is, we all might be mid-20s to early 30s and doing all different kinds of jobs, but when it comes to a sleepover, it's all about having fun. For our ages, we all managed to stay up until about 1:30-2pm - which is impressive, as we mostly find late nights quite difficult now. One mate also decided to go with a onesie, whilst I decided to wear my Selk bag (a sleeping bag that has arms, legs and a hood - its very cool!)

The thing is, you are as young as you feel and although we had a sleepover, it is completely different to when we were younger. For me, it was just nice to have one night where you could forget about everything else and just have a night in with the girls. After all, "When the working week is done, oh girls just want to have fun".

Blog title is from this 80s song (and also the title to a film I like from the same period : p): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIb6AZdTr-A

"Dun dun dun dun DUN, dun dun dun dun DUN DUN, dun!"

2012-10-04T16:18:00.001+01:00

If you haven't guessed it. The title of the blog is the end of the theme tune to Red Dwarf and the new Series X is starting tonight on Dave. As homage to the series, I decided that today's blog would be about my love for this cult series.

Let's go back to the mid-90s. I was about 12-13 yrs old and a good middle class girl who spent time watching TV after participating in one of my hobbies and doing my homework. Red Dwarf, like may 90s comedy programmes, was on around 9pm, which was perfect timing for me having nothing to do (and I always found it hard getting to sleep). Thanks to my dad being a massive comedy fan, we would watch all kinds of british comedy before bed and I loved it! One of the programmes my dad liked watching was Red Dwarf.

Now I'll admit, when I was younger, although I was clever, I don't think I really ever got a lot of the jokes. However, I liked the vibrant characters, the adventures they went on and I felt that watching it made me more grownup - yes, I was delusional.

Skip forward to being 15. I was still a massive fan and part of the fan club (but not quite like those really crazy fans - when you read the next bit, remember this sentence). However, I had become a keen fan of meeting people that I admired - not a stalker, just a fan! My friend and I then decided that we wanted to meet the different cast members of Red Dwarf. Funny enough, barring Hatty Hayridge, we did actually interact with them all in some way. So here it is:

- Two of my friends and I had a joint email account called Girls On Chat (we didn't have computers at home and we always went online in the library - that's how old we are,lol) and we had read Robert Llwellyn's book The Man on Platform 5. It said on the cover or back page email me and let me know what you think and so we did. And unbelievably we got a reply (we assume it was him but I suppose it could have been the publicist/assistant) and it was really cool.

- A few of my mates came with me to see the Soul Train tour with Danny John Jules in. We loved the show, thought he was fab and decided to try and meet him on another day. Like the crazy teens we were, we waited near Stage Door for AT LEAST 6 hours (and met another group of girls waiting to meet him - one who was my pen friend for years after) and finally saw the man himself. Unfortunately he was heading into a rehearsal but said if we wrote down our address he would get back to us. We wrote down one address and all our names and then just went home, happy that we had met him. Anyway, within a few weeks, my friend called me up and said she had received an envelope. Inside was signed pictures of him for all of us and a hand written letter - we couldn't believe it! What a nice guy : ) I get ribbed more for the fact, that the theatre I stood outside of for so long, was the venue I then worked in for years - embarrassing, LOL

- My mate Sam and I went to Catford Theatre to see the stand up tour that Chris Barrie and Norman Lovett were doing. It was great going because I can't even remember if we were old enough to go, but it was really good. Unbelievably, they were doing a signing in the foyer, so we made sure we were right near the front of the queue. It still makes me laugh how red faced and embarrassed we were when we went up to the table (there is a funny pic somewhere, when I find it, it's going up) but they were both really nice (I especially liked the fact that Chris Barrie had a beer with him - casual, laid back signing, lol)

- Shortly after this, my mate found out that Craig Charles was performing a stand up act at Fairfield Halls in Croydon. Unfortunately, we were all broke (my friend had managed to see him at another venue already) but really wanted to meet him. Like teenagers do, we thought, stuff it, we'll wait out near stage door and try and catch him at the end of the show. We waited for a bit, but no one came out, so we decided to ask the person on duty. They told us, if we were quick, he was still in the bar at the moment. We literally ran all the way round (if you know the venue, it's quite big) and dashed to the bar. Low and behold, there he was having a drink. It was really cool actually because we chatted to him for a bit and he was REALLY nice (he even hung up on a call to speak to us) - one of those trips where you were glad you had made the effort.

Now fast forward to now. I'm turning 30 in less than a month (oh christ, lol) and still a massive fan. What's even better is my boyfriend is a big fan too - he's coming to mine to watch the first episode tonight : )

Red Dwarf is like that thing in your life you can't live without, the Alan Partridge and BlackAdder of sci-fi comedy and the episodes never get old. It is part of my growing up process, assisted in the love I have for the industry I now work in and it is something that will always sit on my shelf ready to be watched.

Everyone has their own views about favourite seasons and episodes, but I find it hard to pick. The whole collection makes me smile and shows a great process of change through the cast, technical equipment and the writing. Nothing can and will stay the same, but that's why this show has been going so long.

I am so excited about the new season and wish everyone involved with it a happy debut tonight. Oh yeah and so glad that Dave has assisted in bringing it back - your channel ROCKS! It's weird to think that in 10 years time I could have kids of my own and I could unknowingly be shaping their TV future. I better make sure I keep Red Dwarf to hand : )

As I thank you to this great programme, I also hand drew this picture today, I hope you all like it.

Blog title comes from a fan's metal version of the title music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWcA2qOv9Ww&feature=related

Two other great Red Dwarf song links

Rimmer's Munchkin Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9-CG6gCrPYM

Tongue Tied: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3t3IKlXqFU (I actually have this on record, thanks to someone I know who gave it to me)

"Oh crazzzzzey....but it feels alright..."

2012-10-03T23:53:00.000+01:00

Everyone likes a good craze and at the moment it is all about K-Pop and PSY's Gangham Style.

Your probably like me and going, WHAT! Unbelievably the K-Pop craze (music style from Korea), I actually heard about through my 50 something mother - it wasn't even me who heard it first : ( And then as for Gangham Style, I only heard this about a week ago and I LOVE IT!

Gangham Style is like all popular songs that start a craze, it has a catchy tune, with simple but iconic dance moves and normally a good video (but not always as you'll see from some of my other examples below). Gangham style is definitely the first craze on the 2010 decade and thank god, cos boy I miss a bit of wholesome cheesiness!

As you'll see in the video link below, the lead guy has charm, is humorous and he's added a bit of fun to the current popular culture of Dance music - what a genius!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bZkp7q19f0

And like any great addictive song, there is always a host of parodies to follow and the best of these I've found so far is below:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKwdDbdPego

I have to say, I love a good craze! Since I was a kid, I have not only grown up with crazes before my time, but enough that have appeared in front of my eyes. The thing that makes me laugh is not all of them have been aimed at young people (or been suitable) and yet we all know them.

I have decided that I didn't want to make this particular article just talking, so below have added some of the particular song crazes and tracks that made me smile as I was growing up (some because of the weird lyrics, some because of the routines). Many are quite weird, but I was born in the 80s, when people just released what they wanted, lol

Star Trekking: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FCARADb9asE

The Chicken Song: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-247969462851854200

Gangbang (I kid you not): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5grN83P-jC4&feature=fvwrel

Wigwag Bam: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rF9cUmT_IGs

5,6,7,8: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NO-h9PFum4

Saturday Night: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOvcytygY_M&feature=relmfu

The Ketchup Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IQ0snWgef0&feature=related

Superman: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Le-mYN3dl0

Oops upside your head: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlMIzAl_nDo

I would have put the Cha Cha Slide, but for some reason, you can't access any of the videos online - random!

Well, I hope that has entertained you for a bit. Until the next instalment...

The blog title today comes from a song that literally tells you what will happen when you listen to a popular song too much: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4VK9_CfOLQ

"Tic-tic-tic-tic boom!"

2012-10-02T15:40:00.000+01:00

Decided to go to the theatre with a friend last night and see a bit of fringe theatre. For someone that has worked so much in this industry, I am quite picky about what I see. Mainly because I don't want to pay a lot to see a show, don't want to see a show I've worked on and I want something different, not the same sort of tosh that everyone produces.

I booked us two tickets to see a show called Tick Tick Boom. The reason I chose this was because it was about a guy turning 30 and how he wasn't copying very well with it and thinking it was a roll reversal of how I felt, thought it might be interesting (for this blog and myself).

Let's say, I'm glad I didn't buy the programme! This play unfortunately slots into the bad side of fringe theatre.

First, let's go back to before the show. After downing three cocktails each (it took us ages to get served in the place we had gone to and landed up drinking our "special offer" cocktails very quickly - they were generally good though) we headed to the venue. En route, I said to my friend that I hoped this wasn't one of these shockingly bad fringe shows, because that sometimes happens when you get offer tickets (I was thinking bad American musical trying to hard and moany). When we got there, we were told the bar was round the other side of the stage, so I suggested we sat there (who doesn't want to be near the bar at the interval!). What a huge mistake!

The show goes up late and so finally the lights dim. Nearly as soon as the first guy has opened his mouth, I am regretting my decision (we should have stayed in the cocktail bar). Guess what it is moany, American and awful! The show is a three-hander (which is fine for the right storyline) but they are trying to play too many characters. The storyline is emotionless and so I feel nothing for the characters. The bits that are meant to be funny aren't. The songs don't relate enough to the initial story ("the little green dress" and "trapped in a cage, ask the birds" - WHAT!).

Well, if the show wasn't bad enough, it didn't even have an interval. We couldn't leave. Due to me, we were the wrong side of the stage near the bar with no exit, so we had 1hr 30mins of this awful tosh! I kept apologising to my friend at different points when the lights dimmed, she couldn't look at me because it was so bad and she wanted to laugh. Thank god no one was sitting next to us, as I spent most the show with my hand on the bag getting ready to exit. I can see why we managed to get really cheap tickets.

It was a shame, as the singing/acting wasn't horrendous, they had just signed up to the wrong show. Asides from the performance itself, it was hard to ignore technical issues such as the white tape stuck to the man's neck holding the mic on, the awful designer dress the actress was meant to be wearing and the constant buzzing coming from one of the mics - it felt like amateur hour!

I have to say this show has now gone on the list of 5 of the worst fringe shows I have EVER seen, mainly because I wanted to leave as soon as it started. This is impressive as the other four include: someone being resuscitated by his own hand puppet, a man forcing patrons to do obscene and disgusting things, a cast member coming out of character to wake my dad up because he's fallen asleep and Tony Blair the musical (where the show was rubbish and it was so hot in the auditorium, we left because two of our group nearly collapsed). At least these all happened in Edinburgh, where you expect good and bad shows at the fringe, but to transfer to London - whose supporting this awful writing!

It's such a shame because there are so many great pieces out there that people should see/fund and yet this was a poor example of what turning 30 feels like and money badly spent. The only thing this show fuelled was conversation and more alcohol - I suppose at least we got something out of it : ) Oh and the lyrical title, that's because like the title of this play, the script should be blown up rather than performed!

Blog title comes from a popular track from the early 90s: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AVWZwZq_QU

" It's astounding. Time is fleeting..."

2012-09-27T16:57:00.004+01:00

So today is just under a month until I turn 30 : s Boy how fast time has gone since I started writing this blog - it seemed so far away!

So how do I feel? A little nervous, a little frustrated but overall not too bad. The main problem is it's hard enough realising that your in your late 20s, but trying to think that I'll be joining the 30 somethings soon is mind boggling! There's nothing wrong with it (many of my friends are older than me) but it just doesn't seem right. Why me! Where did my 20s go?

Overall, I have just not been thinking about (which is the best thing for it) but it's hard for it not to slip back in there.

You see, my problem is, I still feel that I haven't achieved enough before this birthday and one month is just not enough time to do it all in. I know that I won't turn 30 and be trapped in my house apart from going to work, but for some reason, that's how my mind sees it.

I know many girlfriends of mine that have got passed the 30 mark, so there is light past the birthday, but I'm still scared : s

I think the thing that made me think of it the other day, was the change that I will need to make to the title of this block. It is currently Route to Thirty and I have decided I am enjoying writing it so much that I don't want it to end, but the title needs to change. I want it to have the same chatty, blog manner where I natter about life but I will be past 30. Do I really want it to be Route to 40? That makes me feel even older so soon from this first great shock. But what else am I heading towards. I'm not planning on having children at the moment, I'm not getting married and I hope to have a proper job soon so don't want it to be Route to Work (that and it sounds lame). It will be a Route to something I just don't know what. Maybe to growing up? Maybe I don't want to do that yet.

That's the main problem, I don't want to grow up! I prefer my life as an adult but now want to stay this age (kind of like an adult Peter Pan, lol). I don't want to be the old one in the club that still likes dancing to hits - it makes me sad, I will always like dancing!

I know I'm probably looking into this too much but hey ho, I'm a woman hitting the 30 sign without being able to drive - it just doesn't seem right!

Well, for now, I'm going to stay in denial and watch some Mad Men which makes me feel sophisticated, young and on the pulse. If your not watching it, you just don't know what your missing!

To cheer us all up, my title today is from one of my favourite musicals of all time, The Rocky Horror Show. So get your dancing boots on and click the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=opOsgzzDPdw&feature=related

"Lets talk about all the good things, all the bad things that may be"

2012-09-22T12:54:00.001+01:00

Everyone was talking about over the summer and now I'm reading. Did you guess it? If not, I'm talking about 50 Shades of Grey.

Now I didn't buy it and certainly didn't originally plan to read it, but everyone has gone on about it so much, my friend lent it to me to see what I thought.

I have to say I am quite disappointed by it and I am 4/5 of the way through. My biggest problem is I dislike the two lead characters. So there's Christian Grey, who from the descriptions in the book has long fingers (creepy like a horror film), is arrogant, likes possession over everything and can't take no for an answer. Then there is Anastasia, she's SO naive (I used to be naive but not like her, she's just stupid), annoying (any girl that causes her sexual area "my sex" needs to be slapped) and she is so caught up with her feelings she doesn't listen to the one reasonably sensible person (she has her moments) in her life, her friend Kate.

I mean, who is this book for: Is it young girls who are being told it's fine to fall for the weird older guy stalking you, older women looking for a gritty storyline or for men thinking of new ways to pursue young women?

I am not disgusted of it because of the content (I'm nearly 30 and have watched/read things far worse), I am disgusted because it is so popular. I just can't see the interest. Everything from the capital letters at the start of important sentences to the fact that Christian Grey is just a sex addict and rarely thinks of anything else. Why have people been reading this?

The problem is, personally as a women, I either want a romantic story with a bit of lust or sex in it or I want a piece that has bits of unexpected sex scenes that rial the senses. I would have more thrills having some Hotel Chocolat's than reading this - at least I would get pleasure from that!

I have to say with the likes of some of my favourite programs on box set (including Mad Men, Smallville, Tudors and in general anything made by HBO), I just can't wait to put this book down and get into some real drama. To think I put this book first in front of a queue of books by great authors - how disappointing!

I won't be reading the next two (it has been a waste of time reading the first) and I can't wait to hand this Fifty Shades of Bollocks back.

Blog title is from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzfo4txaQJA

"This was the last thing on my mind"

2012-09-04T10:48:00.000+01:00

Isn't it weird how important things in your life just seem to change over time. My boyfriend and I have been together nearly 7 years and when we first got together the excitement of jumping each others bones (yeah, I'm being dirty, lol) was thrilling and frequent. Now it is still very enjoyable, but different (in a good way, as in you know the person really well and your more comfortable with them than when you first dated) and not that often.

Now there is no one to blame about this apart from ourselves. Like many of us, work has taken over our lives and everything else seems to have taken a back seat - something I am not happy about and want to change!

First problem is definitely the fact that we live in London. London may have everything you need and be open 24 hours, but that is the exact reason it is a problem - we work in an industry where people want to be entertained all the time. Due to both of us working in the Arts, we do not work regular hours and our shifts can go from 7am to past midnight (any day of the week). And this is without the crazy travel we do (I had a job recently where I had to go to Wembley and one way it took over 2 hrs to get there : s) It's hard enough spending time together just to see each other, let alone anything else.

Second problem is our actual jobs. We both have times when we get told the day before that we have to do an extra shift or day and have to change our plans. Most the time we work around it, but it is still annoying - I have missed weddings, birthdays, Christmas parties etc for this : (

The thing is, even when we want to do "stuff" we are tired and so it's best not to do anything than it be rubbish and leave it to another day - sometimes I also feel flirty but not dirty and that's cack too. It's so complicated!

My boyfriend and I were talking about "the future" (that scary adult talk that occurs around this age) and he was talking about having children. Now, he's a little younger than me (by a year or so), which is good, because when I actually became an adult (not 18 when you can drink and think your grown up), I realised I wanted some kind of career before children and that it would take a few more years for him to want any. But there's a few other things asides from career I want before this: at least once where we get to go on a mini travelling expedition (a couple of months will do, to learn how to drive (yes, I'm a loser - actually no, I live in London, why drive, it's too expensive) to have more fun sex before it becomes "planned" sex (lol) and a signed agreement that the babies we have don't turn my tight special place into a cave - sounds wrong, but I'm currently happy with it down there, lol. The thing is, he is now interested in having kids in the next couple of years and I don't know if it is cos I am getting older, he is or both of us are. I didn't really think that guys worried about getting too old for kids, until I read the article "Hear that? It's my boyological clock ticking!" in Glamour.

Russell Kane wrote a rather interesting piece about wanting kids but having not met the right women yet. He suggests that men have a boyological clock, it's just in their brains rather than in their organs and that they like the idea of being an active young dad, than a tottering middle aged man. The thing is, he suggests, that most men don't realise until they are already past they're ideal age and it's too late.

I have to say, if this is the case, I'll have to start taking my fella more seriously. I do want kids but the moment has to be right - after all I'm the one with 9 possible months of agony and then a kid for life. You can't just say yes on a whim!

I do know that although I am career minded, I have my mother's nature for wanting kids and have become a bit broody at times (cute little girls at wedding, the young dads dancing round with their tiny sons, a baby's laugh - there is just something about it that I want). However, first he better put a ring on it (power to Beyonce) and then I will reconsider in time. I'm not even 30 yet, there's time and much more fun to be had first : )

Blog title comes from the one and only, cheesily good, STEPS: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnN3YATAe7o

I actually saw them live recently at one of their reunion shows and here's one of the pics : )

"The clock up on the wall was tickin'"

2012-09-02T12:43:00.000+01:00

It's the Sunday morning after another wedding reception. It's been quite good this year as all the weddings we've been to have been for people we are close to, so we've known lots of people and have been so happy to be at their big day. But it does start to put the pressure on with your own relationsship and the fact that we're getting older.

My boyfriend and I now go to about 3 weddings a year (this ones a super year and we are actually going to five - we work in Theatre and have a lot of mates outside of the industry, so someone's always celebrating something). At one point I was sick of hearing about weddings and feeling that I should care. Not because I am a horrible person but because it was always the topic of conversation and always came back to when we were getting married, when we weren't ready and couldn't afford it (we still can't but that doesn't bother me too much at the mo).

Luckily, as I said before, we started going to more weddings for people closer to us and although "wedding" was becoming my least favourite word, at least it was finally seeing close mates truely happy.

Before my guy rolled out of bed this morning, I decided to read my current copy of Glamour (still reading it at the moment, lol - connected with a previous blog). There was a really interesting article called "He's 29? Run!", which talked about this new form of early mid-life crisis that guys (especially from the 80s babyboom) are having between the ages of 25 and 35 (funny enough, I think my brother started his about a year ago and is still having it) but mainly occurs on the lead up to the big 30.

Through reading the article and through personal experience, it seems that women do a similar thing but generally a lot more internally and only discuss with friends when the question is broached. As for the guys in this article, they seem to have made brash decisions and decide to change the whole of their life to deal with the worry of getting old - asides from the guy that had realised he was gay and hadn't told his girlfriend (that was just unfair on both the girlfriend and himself|).

The thing is because men and women's minds work so differently, it is difficult at times to communicate and understand the differences and similarities between the mental states we go through in our lives. I really like reading articles like this which help to break down those barriers and sometimes allow you to have conversations with your own mates/boyfriends that you wouldn't have discussed before.

I am 30 in less than 2 months and I feel the inner pressure going on in my head. I know that day will be no different to any other, yet it seems like such a difficult milestone to past. And no, I am not going to give up everything and go to the other side of the world, but there is the thing in my mind that I have not achieved in the way I should have. There is nothing I can do about it apart from carrying on working hard and still striving for the things I have always wanted. At the moment for me this is: a happy home, a happy relationship, having and keeping my amazing friends and a job that excites me and makes me want to be there each day - it sounds like a lot but I know it's achievable! (I also want to state that I have had all of these, but it is hard to have them all at the same time).

I have read another male article that interests me to do with kids, but I will blog this tomorrow - don't want to overfill anyone's heads on a Sunday.

Today's blog title is based on: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4JhvGLjgqY&feature=related

"And the worrrrlllddd, will live as one."

2012-08-30T11:57:00.002+01:00

Does anyone remember the big event that happened in London a few weeks back. Yeah, the Olympics! Well, actually I don't. I was working in Oxford over that period with no TV, so the only thing I saw was the opening ceremony before I left and the closing ceremony (because we managed to get a live link on our computer at work).

I have to say, I wasn't that bothered about the Olympics. We had had all the hype for years, were told about the awful transport we would have in London and I was just desperate to be away from home for it. Unfortunately, when it came to it, it wasn't as crazy as they had expected and I've probably missed out on something cool.

However, asides from that, I was looking forward to being back for the Paralympics.

First of all, channel 4 should be congratulated on not only broadcasting the event but on their amazing advertising: They truly built the lead up from the Olympics to the Paralympics with their adverts alone.

Secondly (but not less importantly), everyone involved and participating in the Paralympics should be congratulated. This is one of the first times that the sporting event has been noticed in the way it should be and I can tell it is already going to be an amazing week and a half of coverage.

I watched the opening ceremony yesterday and it was great to see the likes of Steven Hawkins alongside dance act Orbital, an array of arial acts, the history of science and much more. The evening was innovative, clever and inspiring and really showed us the greatness of the United Kingdom and what we can be. I also love that Beverley knight finished with "I am what I am" whilst everyone else was dancing in the background - great choice!

Today, I have been watching the swimming and having previously been a swimmer as a youngster ( 3-16 years old and my main discipline was speed swimming), I am SO impressed by the competitors. One guy won the backstroke who had no arms and all his power came from doing backward butterfly kicks for 100m and another women with cerebral palsy, mainly used only the power in her arms to win. Watching today really puts life into perspective and makes you realise how many incredible people live and work around us. Everything I have trained for seems nothing against what some of these people must have gone through to get where they are today.

I hope, like me, you will enjoy and support the Paralympics and make the most out of this incredible sporting event that we are lucky enough to host.

My blog title comes from a very fitting song, which is a favourite of mine: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRhq-yO1KN8

"Music, makes the people, come together"

2012-08-22T13:33:00.000+01:00

I went to a ska gig for the first time in ages the other day and it was brilliant! I went to see Reel Big Fish who have been playing together for 21 years and are just as awesome as the first time I saw them.

The thing I like about a good gig (especially your indie/rock/metal/ska and alternative) is the way the audience come together, the rapport between the audience and the musicians and the natural energy you gain from a fun, relaxed environment.

I have been going to gigs since I was about 16 and there is nothing like a good gig to make your day. Although in recent years I have been to a lot of dance gigs, I tended to go to a lot more rock and alternative ones in the past (I definitely prefer the audiences at these and there are less dickheads).

One of the first gigs I remember going to was ska band OPM at the joyous Mean Fiddler (still one of the saddest venues to close down in London). As well as feeling rather grown up that I was going to a gig on my own, it was also the fact I was going to a gig for an album I really loved : ) I also remember people smoking a lot of weird and although I have never taken drugs, I may have been getting high on second hand puff whilst jumping around, lol. But aside from the haziness, it was a great night and will forever be in my memory.

Since that night, I started going to gigs on a regular basis, as well as Street Teaming, which allowed me to work on and see lots of cool bands : ) I was at the final gig for McClusky (check them out if you like dark metal music) and it was incredible. There is just something great about tons of people who love the same songs, coming together and singing their hearts out to a live track - you can't beat it!

The best thing about a good gig is it is great escapism for your real life and nothing matters when you jump around like a lunatic : ) I have a list of the top 5 bands I have ever seen live and it is difficult to keep a list when I have been to so many great ones, but at the moment the list stand at this:

1. System of a Down
2. Weird Al Yankovich
3. David Guetta
4. Franz Ferdinand
5. Reel Big Fish (both times)

When I went to System of a Down, it was so packed and hot, I came out soaked, completely covered from other peoples sweat. I also lost the two people I was with within about 20 mins but still had a great time - it was pure madness!

Other gigs that have been great have included: Scissor Sisters, Electric 6, Maroon 5, Above and Beyond, Tiesto, Hot Hot Heat, Alien Ant Farm.

If you haven't been out for awhile and need something to perk you up, go to a gig. Reel Big Fish was exactly what I needed after a few tough months of work and now I'm desperate for my next one : )

Blog title comes from: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sdz2oW0NMFk

Reel Big Fish at o2 Oxford

"Marlon Brando, Jimmy Dean, On the cover of a magazine"

2012-08-12T12:09:00.000+01:00

Currently working away from home and staying in student accommodation, with no facilities apart from a kettle and a sink. Suddenly I feel once again cut off from the world and most the time, completely oblivious that the Olympics is going on.

So barring a bit of Netflix on the tablet, I get quite bored when I have spare time in my room. So, I decided that because I need something that I can stop and start rather than put time into, I'd buy some magazines.

Now for those of you in your late 20s, I don't know what magazines that you read, but I find it really hard to choose publications. The problem is I am no longer in my late teens but I am also not a middle-aged middle-class mother of two. I just want a good read that I can slip in and out of.

I've been reading "women's" magazines for years. Starting with the "Smash Hits" and "Top of the Pops" of my teenie bopper and early teens to the "Just Seventeen" and "More" of my later teens. The thing is, in those day, I was trying to keep up with the trends of clothes, music and films and more often or not, to swoon after the idols of my early 90s youth. Obviously, as secondary school sunk in, reading Smash Hits was just not cool enough for a year 8 going into year 9 girl. This is when the Just Seventeen era sank in.

In all honesty, when I went onto what I'll call "the second strand" of teen magazines, I was more reading them for the gossip than the sexual content. At that particular age I loved having fun with mates but dating was the last thing on my mind. I was a proper academic (or boffin used to be the term in my school), not a nerd, I just worked really hard at what I did and wanted to do well in the subjects I liked. Of course the sexual content at least kept me up to scratch on what some girls of my age group were talking about, so I never felt like I knew nothing. I also have quite open minded parents, so I was never scared to talk to them about anything.

College was definitely the biggest change for my magazine reading, when suddenly it was all about "More", that had things like position of the week in it. Also, the pictures of the guys were a lot more risque, it was quite hot : ) Suddenly I felt very behind on everything. I felt like the only virgin in the college, lol. It wasn't made easier by the fact that half my class were a year above me, so to them, everything they were talking about was normal. However, these magazines actually came at the right age, where I started having an interest in certain guys I knew. I wouldn't say they were the answers to my problems, but were a great support system to growing up.

So now let's move forward just over 10 years. So on the lead up to this I enjoyed fun and frolics of being 18-23 years old and made up for the so called "missed years" of my teens (in all honesty, I had a lot of fun, but I couldn't of handled everything I dealt with then at secondary school, I just wasn't as mature and grown up as I thought I was). Then since being 23, I have been in a long term relationship with a guy I met over 11 years ago but only stuck with permanently after a lot of two-ing and fro-ing over the years. I'm not engaged or married (even though it's definitely a lot closer on the cards than previously) and I currently don't have kids (a choice and money thing). So where does that leave me with a good magazine read?

I like a good bit of Suduko and Hanjie, but I don't want to be just doing that. I'm not the "Good Housewife" or old enough to buy "Women's Weekly", so what is for me? I am like many career minded ladies that don't want to think that we are only worthy of tabloid reads like "Heat" and "OK", we want something informative, fun and real - is that really so much to ask for? I still like clubbing (just not with the under-agers), I like festivals, seeing films, going out with mates, buying stuff that isn't the most expensive on the shelf and bargains. Just because I'm nearly 30, does all that have to end?

I am currently still buying things like "Glamour" and "Company", but as the ages of the male pin ups and the articles by the women are by younger and younger people, I do wonder, am I just too old for Glamour? I think the best read (which happens to be free but is only available in central London on a Wednesday) would be the fabulous Stylist (which I have talked about before). It's the one magazine where I feel it covers a lot of my interests and does not make me out to be dumb. I fear if it was not for this, women of my age wouldn't have anything. If anyone wants to create a magazine, I definitely suggest this niche in the market. We are new age women whose thoughts are not just about a mortgage, husband and popping kids out. I know I want more from life than just that and I think the magazine industry is missing out on all those readers, who are spending their pennies on other forms of media instead.

As William Nicholson said "We read to know we are not alone" and how true, because I know I am not.

Blog title comes from Madonna's Vogue: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuJQSAiODqI

"If you don't like it, you can't send it back"

2012-08-01T16:33:00.000+01:00

I wrote a blog awhile back to do with getting older and having to deal with changes in asthma, well the revelation is now having to cut down on caffeine.

I LOVE caffeine! Not the look of it, possibly the taste but definitely what it does, keeps me awake.

For anyone who works in the Arts or another stressful work environment where the average hours tend to be 10-14 hrs a day, caffeine is essential.

Well, I've been told by my doctor to ideally cut it out altogether. Due to the fact I adore chocolate and couldn't get rid of that on top of everything else (there would be no point in living, lol), I've decided to cut out the rest and that's good enough for me. The main reason is due to repetitive heart palpitations that I seem to have been getting on and off in the last few months after various problems with my breathing. They are still unsure if it is connected with Asthma pumps, stress, allergies etc, so now caffeine is coming out of my diet (sugar better not be next or I won't know how to deal with it : s)

So Caffeine free, how hard can it be? It's not wheat related, I'm not vegan and as far as I know, I don't have any serious allergies. Unfortunately, buying caffeine free items was a bit harder than I thought. Caffeine can be found in fizzy drinks, tea, coffee, chocolate, cocoa powder, baking powder, cookies, liquors, cereal, certain desserts, soy milk, pie crusts, frozen yoghurt's, cake frostings, chocolate ice-cream and these as just the ones I found on nutrition data. I have to say, it's not until you have to stop eating something, that you realise how many food sources your item is in.

Now again, we don't know how much the caffeine is particularly effecting me, so I am not going to stop eating all of these (and some of them I pretty much don't eat /drink anyway) but I have to cut out some of the main ones.

So I went shopping and luckily came across some decaf tea and coffee (which I have taken away to my live away job). I have to say, caffeine must add some kind of taste, because I can't get used to the decaf stuff, especially the coffee. The tea is growing on me and I think I can have herbal and fruit teas as a change : ) I have generally cut out fizzy drinks out of the equation, baring coke, as it's what I like to mix my spirits with. Boy, is it hard to get decaf coke! Remember in the 90s, when you had red, white and gold labelled colas? Well I don't know what's been happening to the gold one (no caffeine, no sugar) because I found one measly place that sold it and only in small bottles. I just want one 2 Litre bottle of caffeine free coke to last me on this job and that's not even possible! Not impressed : (

The other problem I have had is headaches. The first few days and even a little now, I had tremendous headaches that would not go away. I have since been told by someone that it does the same as coming off sugar, your body can't deal with the lack of it and is making up for the loss - by making me feel ill, that's not fair!

I hope after being on this caffeine free diet that I will slowly be able to bring it back in at some point, just not in the heavy doses I was absorbing it before. Because like many I love tea and coffee and I just can't imagine them in their tasty entirety being part of my life anymore.

Blog title based on: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZcJjMnHoIBI

"The info from what she reads, makes her a total fox"

2012-07-22T11:14:00.002+01:00

Reading. One of those things I was forced to do by my intellectual father, who liked nothing more than to engulf himself in a book. He wanted me to be academic, I was academic but I also knew what I liked and didn't like. And some of his choices (including 3 men and a boat) just didn't rock my boat of imagination - it made me want to sleep!

I gave up on books after my GCSE's and didn't find them again until university, when suddenly all I wanted to do was read and absorb the words from every page. And this wasn't just academic books, it was plays, autobiographies and fiction - I wanted it all!

I read books for a weird reason - I am a front cover reader. I choose books because I like the cover, then I read the back and if I like both, I buy it. In general, this has always worked for me as I am picky about what I read and if something looks boring from the outside, the design probably goes with the text - why wouldn't it!

This doesn't mean I stick to one genre or anything, I have read Stephen King to more contemporary writers like Matt Beaumont (love him, have loads of his stuff ("E" is good and "The Book, The Film, The T-shirt") and his wife's a writer too (Maria Beaumont) - have a look at her stuff too). I also like plays by people like Mark Ravenhill and Patrick Marber.

There is something about a book, that I don't think I would ever get from a Kindle. It's not just about the words being on a digital screen (which I hate by the way, because it hurts your eyes a lot quicker - wait until Kindle readers start going blind by using theirs too much) but it's the feel of the pages, the fact that if it's borrowed or 2nd hand, the people that have gone through the same emotions when reading the text, being excited about finding the book in your bag and desperate to read. That's what makes reading a book so great!

One of my favourite collection of books that I have ever read has to be Red Dwarf. Being a big fan of the series and intrigued by the books, I decided to borrow my dad's copy. As a fan, these books were amazing! I used to lie on the bed and read them whilst imagining the different characters saying the words - it was like the words truly lifted off the page. I also like the fact that different episodes appear in the books but they are only part of the bigger picture, which was even more exciting! I am very lucky that one of mine is actually signed by two of the cast - I was like 16 and the book was originally my dad's but soon became mine once it was signed. I also have a book signed by Danny Wallace and Rich Fulcher (Tiny Acts of Rebellion is hilarious - seen it live and read the book) - by chance, not even on purpose originally : )

I am currently reading the great How to be a Woman by Caitlin Moran. I have to say, it has been while since I have laughed and nearly cried on transport because of a book. She has completely covered the feeling of growing up as a woman and not really knowing how to become one. I also love her references to the world around her - so many of her childhood memories are things I remember too (which makes sense, as she's probably only about 5 years older than me). If there are any woman out there who haven't read this (it's won at least one award and I'm probably one of the last to read it), you must! Well, I say must. As long as you are an open minded and open person in general, I would suggest it. If your not, maybe leave it. It will make you cringe and laugh quite intensely, but that's what I like about it : )

You see, the great thing about a book is the connections or disconnection from your life causing an amazing form of escapism that one hardly ever finds in any other art form. I tend to work in stressful environments and a book is the only time I can remove myself from my work and just feel relaxed (especially if my phones off).

So if it's been awhile since you've read a good book, give it a go. Whether its by reading a book suggested to you or being radical like me and choosing a front cover : ) By the way, I haven't read the Fifty Shades of Grey but did hear them taking the piss out of it in the comedy tent at Latitude Music Festival. I actually wanted to read it cos the one with the mask on the cover - I own that mask, so I wanted to read it. What can I say? I'm weird, LOL

Blog title based on the amazing Mark Grist's "I Like a Girl That Reads" comedy poem: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rWwXJT4LA5A&feature=player_embedded

"Like a bridge, over troubled waters..."

2012-07-20T00:31:00.000+01:00

So, for those of you who are o2 customers, some of you may have had to deal with the madness of last weeks signal problems. I was one of them, so I feel your pain!

A day before I was leaving for a weekend at Latitude, my phone decided to play silly buggers and loose it's signal. Originally, I thought it was just because I was in an area with poor signal, but then when it said my "Sim Card was not recognised", I knew something was actually up.

I look online and find out that since 1:30pm that day, there have been various problems with random peoples phones. I try and phone o2 and after about 30 mins of being on hold a message tells me "There are problems with o2, call back tomorrow"and then the phone cuts out - dammit!

My brother, 100 yards away, no problems with his o2 - dammit!

I land up spending nearly my whole time at Latitude with no signal but internet (it doesn't recognise my phone but will give me internet - tell me how that makes sense) which makes it very difficult to organise stuff, especially when you are Stage Managing a show.

Anyway today, they decided to apologise and deduct 10% of my bill for the inconvenience (that's nice) and also give me £10 back in the near forceable with Priority Moments : )

Ahhhh, Priority Moments, the way to make my day! You know in the space of a month I have had 4 completely free items - a latte, an iced tea, a chicken and bacon baguette and a bottle of Coca Cola.

I am telling you, if you want a pay monthly contract and are considering o2, do it! (Apart from the annoying hiccup they had last weekend). Priority Moments are currently offering you loads of free stuff if you keep up to date with the offers. I love nothing more than a free lunch and they just keep offering things to me. All you have to do is show a code and you get stuff - SWEET!

For someone who used to remember when food items were a lot cheaper, this is like me getting cash back for over paying : )

I don't normally like cheap gimmicks to keep me connected to a company, but I have to say o2, your doing alright so far, just keep our data safe!

Blog title comes from: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjNgn4r6SOA

"I'm mad, really bad, but don't tell my mum and dad..."

2012-07-17T13:30:00.000+01:00

So I just came back from Latitude Music Festival and I had such a great time : )

I've been to Latitude a few years back but worked on behalf of Gorillas.org (and Beer Workers Co.) on the bar. This year I was Stage Managing a show for Theatre 503 (at the Theatre Space) called Billy Chicken's Is A Psychopath Superstar.

First of all, I had a pass that allowed me into more areas : ) this included us being able to pitch our tents in the performers area and using the nice facilities : ) The amount of famous people I saw wandering around this area over the weekend was insane - I even saw Marcus Brigstock getting into his funky 1950s caravan (it was awesome!)

Second of all, our tech and shows were on the Thursday and Friday, giving us Saturday and Sunday to do whatever we wanted at the festival - what isn't cool about that!

My duties also changed over the rehearsal period, so I landed up calling the show (cueing the lights and sound from the desk). I was originally quite scared about this but it was so enjoyable to do (especially as I know the show inside out) and it was a really great confidence booster - I would DEFINITELY do it again! On top of this it was for a 650 seater that was packed on both nights. This is about the same size venue I work within but never having the power over the show - so cool : )

Other than work, I had about 3hrs sleep a night and got to do lots of cool things:
- saw Professor Brian Cox with Al Murrey and various other people talking about the connections between the arts and science
- Marcus Brigstock and Robin Ince on the early Edition for Radio 4
- Tim Key
- Elbow (the best performance of the weekend)
- Rufus Wainwright and his band
- Guilty Pleasures (will definitely have to go to this club night more often)
- Lots of dancing in the rain In The Woods to Dermot O'Leary's DJing
- Mark Ravenhill and a guy from the RSC talking about the connections between theatre and religion and how they can both be controlled by government and sponsorship at times
- Johonny Woo (hilarious performance artist who dresses up including singing a song dressed as Mary Portas, lol)
- Mark Grist (the English Teacher known for out rapping his hiphop pupil on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tp4wEewrQdU - so talented!)
- Look Left, Look Right's 4 Musicals
- Disco Shed
- Dexys (Originally Dexy's Midnight Runners - Come On Eileen : p)

If you get a chance to go, you should. The Festival has a bit of everything art based for everyone - you won't be disappointed : )

I also want to thank Theatre 503 company and cast and all the other wonderful people I met, ate, drank and danced with - what a great weekend!

Blog title comes from this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3gFGu9yF34

"Whose got the power, but whose got the power..."

2012-06-22T19:25:00.000+01:00

What on earth is going on at the moment? I went to a meeting to do with work and everyone was just talking about the two main agendas of yesterday in the papers: the Jimmy Carr tax avoidance and the possible disappearance on the GCSEs. And guess what, they both involved David Cameron.

Now I didn't used to be that interested in politics when I was young, apart from a good bit of political satire from Spitting Image, Brass Eye and Have I got News for You. In general, politics was boring and deserved little of my time. However, as I have gone through my 20s, not only do I have an interest in how everything works (probably due to things like doing Jury Service, working on Elections and the fact that a lot of these issues actually affect me now as an adult) but I have an opinion.

First of all, the Jimmy Carr situation. As it has been stated, he didn't do ANYTHING illegal, it is within the law how he avoided tax. The fact that David Cameron decided to pick on a very well comedian, who would not only be supported by many of his fans but also the comedy network. The fact that he forgets we are in a recession and as another well-known comedy performer rightly pointed out, at least Jimmy wasn't wasting public money and putting us into a recession. I am sure there are lots of politicians who have been 'avoiding' taxes etc, there has been proof in the past of all kinds of cover ups involving the government. How about looking a little closer to home and then questioning individuals and finding a way of getting us properly off the teetering edge of recession. Ridiculous! By the way, News Night on BBC2 was very interesting (involved both of these areas of news last night - iplayer it!)

Second, was the idea of scrapping GCSEs. Why do we constantly have to change the way that things are done?

I did a BTEC ND in Performing Arts over 10 years ago and you know what, the BTEC grading has changed SO many times! In fact, my qualification broke down the results of all my subjects but never gave an overall grade. If you now try and find out EXACTLY what my certificate is worth, you get pages of complicated sheets for all different takes on the qualification depending on it's year and nothing for the one I did - What is that about?

Anyway, back to the subject at hand. What is the point of going back to an old system from yolks ago that was scrapped? How is it better than GCSEs? What about all the people that have just taken it? - it means their results are kind of null and void straight away.

Instead of always changing the names of things, re-branding them and in the education system, just constantly confusing all the people that study and work within it, why don't they suss out the problems they have and rectify them - isn't that what you would do in any other business before you looked at other options? Also, it is so stupid that Nick Clegg (and I assume the rest of the Liberal Democrat party) knew nothing of this before it went to press? Perfect timing whilst Clegg himself is out of the country don't you think.

Sometimes these issues and the many others that seem to have arisen (especially since the recent Recession), really annoy the hell out of me. There are so many people in this country working their butts off, trying to find new ways to live within the current climate and instead of sorting out the issues which are destroying this country, they put less important new topics on the table. Changing exam procedures is not going to help this country back on it's feet or a possible 1 million that Jimmy Carr has avoided.

Let's just hope that someone and/or a political party pulls their finger out and sorts out this mess. The UK deserves better than this!

Blog title comes from this cool new humorous triple act that I've only just heard of, Smart Songs. They have the right idea about the government and how it all works : p : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZCB8EOY5d48&list=PL2329445E592C5583&index=2&feature=plpp_video

"Take your Oyster Card and shove it up your..."

2012-06-21T21:18:00.001+01:00

Do you remember when travel in London was happy and simple? I do, it was before the Oyster Card was invented.

Promoted as a "smartcard that you can use instead of paper tickets". They make it sound so easy.

Below I am going to explain how UNEASY this system is. Not the concept, just the fact that it's a stupid bit of plastic that very rarely does what it is meant to.

Kent as a county, was never really interested in the Oyster Card scheme. Like it's residents (the clever ones) we realised that due to being part of greater London and Kent, we would land up paying more by having a system like Oyster instead of a ticket that could get us from Inner London to wherever we were resident. We were against it so much, in some towns, Oyster Card machines were installed and then removed shortly after and did not return for a number of years when other areas had unfortunately succumbed to it's "magic!" When it did return, it drew boundaries on certain lines. Like the time my mum and I visited Dartford on our Oyster cards and got fined at the other end. Oyster card runs on the whole line APART from the final destination which you cannot use on Oyster - how are we meant to know THIS!!! And they clearly mark that there are places to buy Oyster cards in Dartford, even though you can't use them at their station - weird!

Wimbledon Station, one of many evil places where your Oyster Card works in a slightly different way just to confuse you again. At Wimbledon you have to buzz into the station and then on the platform of the train you are getting, but not the same when you come into the station. Also, if the barriers are open at the front doors you just buzz on the platform because if you buzz in the same as normal, you may be fined. WHAT THE F***! And I know it's true, because when it was installed, I got fined SO many times and so did lots of other people I used to know. No signage to say this, like at Dartford.

Today was a glorious day, before my Oyster Card decided to sting me for no reason. I buzzed in at one station and when I buzzed out at my destination it came up as "Seek Assistance 74 (or something similar)". The station I was at doesn't tend to have attendants and I was unsure why it was reacting like this, when an amount came up when I buzzed in originally. I went out later in the day and it had taken the full £7 fine (roughly) instead of the amount for my journey. Absolute w***! I phoned up the Oyster Card number and it says I have to wait 24 hours to phone up (even though I shouldn't have been fined).

If you don't live in London, you may not understand the annoyance of this crappy piece of plastic, but I have had to put up with it since I was a student and I HATE it!.

My blog title comes from this great song that really sums up how I feel about Oyster Card and travel in London in general (If I've mentioned it before, it's because it's the best : p) : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UymKurTBdhw

"The wonder of you"

2012-06-21T10:42:00.000+01:00

I don't know about you, but when I was younger, it was all about the brands you wore for PE. More at secondary than primary, but it still existed.

For a girl, I had quite big feet. By the time I went to secondary, I was a size 5 or 6, which in all honesty matched my height, which was then about 5ft 6-7. All kinds of footwear were difficult (mainly because I needed shoes suitable for school, not an office or a rave, lol) and trainers weren't too bad, but only certain makes supported wide feet as well (which is what mine were).

I remember once being bought Hi-Tec trainers, which now, would probably be a lot cooler than they were then. But at the time, totally uncool and wouldn't people rub it in your faces.

As I got a bit older, I started getting running trainers from a local training show. They were reasonable in price, were great for going on track runs with my dad and were suitable for what I did at school. Unfortunately, they weren't known by other kids, so this also redeemed them as uncool, lol. This brand was New Balance, who are now pretty big and getting more respect in this country. Now I can't really remember that much about them apart from they fit, looked alright and were comfy.

After school, I started trialing different brands including Donnay (Cheap and Cheerful), Adidas (Funky Designs and reasonably hard wearing), Nike (Sporty, but slim fitting) Reebok (Wide Fittings, but more boyish styles), but I never enjoyed wearing them, I just wore them.

And then a great website called Javari came to my attention (one of the best kept secrets I have found in the last year or so). Javari is a sister site to amazon.co.uk, so when you buy something through them, you sign in via your amazon account - perfect! But this isn't the best part, they are kind of like an outlet store, so they do ridiculously amazing offers on here at certain times of the year. And this, is how I was re-introduced to New Balance. I needed new trainers, they came in lots of different colours and styles (including a fitness style one that helps you pump your leg muscles whilst you walk) and they were about 1/4 of the normal price because they were an old style.

Anyway, I kid you not, these trainers are the best buy I have done in ages (and that's coming from a bargain buyer). They are comfy, supportive, wide fitting, look good and go unto really big sizes - what more could someone like me want! They were so good, I not only bought a 2nd pair in a different colour straight away, I have convinced friends of mine to buy them, who are also now enjoying the comfort. I don't secretly work with New Balance, they are just amazing trainers!

So if your strapped for cash and need a new pair of funky fitness wear for your feet, check out Javari, you never know what you will find : )

Blog title from: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MyrQqmc5UT8http://www.newbalance.co.uk/

"All I need is the air that I breathe..."

2012-06-19T14:58:00.000+01:00

So I'm getting older, just like everyone else. And I'm not fit, I'm not going to lie about that either. But my body has been taking the piss recently.

I used to have Asthma when I was a kid. Most the time not really that bad, just the odd problem with breathlessness, but due to the huge amount of extra curricular stuff I did, it was probably get at bay.

However, in recent years where exercise has been secondary to my theatre work, my body has become quite unhealthy. The exercise stuff especially has become non-existent : s

Well, til recently, this wasn't a problem. But due to increased stress levels of trying to re-route my work career and not exercising, my asthma is back and is currently not looking to leave.

The main problem started a few months back when I wasn't enjoying work, had come second to someone else for a job I really wanted and was generally getting stressed with silly things. On the way to a freelance job on a random day, I started getting a very tight chest (making me feel like I was wearing a tight corset) and this followed with having odd times when I found it hard to breathe. Originally we thought it was a chest infection and I was given an inhaler and stuff to take.

Fast forward a month or so one and I suddenly couldn't breathe whilst at work and then it got worse over the following days. Since this event I have been to the doctors several times and now have a blue, purple and brown inhaler and follow up prescriptions.

Unfortunately, moving on to today, I am still having problems and we are still unsure if it is just a random asthma problem, a chest infection that won't go or stress - whatever it is, my breathing sucks at the mo.

I have started trying to eat healthier stuff when I can and do a lot more walking etc, but until the problem clears up a bit, I find it very hard to do much without coughing or having to taken my inhaler.

I wish all those years ago when things were easier and less stressful, that I had enjoyed them more and really realised how lucky I was.

Due to my dry sense of humour on this one, I thought the title was very appropriate for the subject matter. Blog title comes from this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7duPNQCp-w4

"and the whole world has become...electronic"

2012-06-08T16:04:00.001+01:00

When did we all become so reliant on electronic gadgets? Every time I put my phone down, in the back of my head I am thinking "What if someones trying to contact me about work and I've not answered". It's sad but true.

I didn't get my first phone til I was 16 (when I was off to college and at Stage School and my parents wanted to know where I was, lol) and it was a Philips U Phone (a bit like the link, but Black and with a fingerprint mark with a U on it). It did what I needed for that time period, which was making calls and texting people (I had a great social life then, lol). We didn't get our first computer much before that and that had a black screen with green typing and was for word processing (I'm old). Yes and I had a typewriter but I liked it and still miss it now - sniff sniff.

Now, there is so many more gadgets and I've started succumbing to them.

So the mobile phone has become the all in one gadget (does everything but because of this, not all features are brilliant). I have a smart phone and it has helped my lifestyle with organising but I also feel it has taken over my life - feel lost without it.

I now have my first ever tablet, due to the fact that my phone is too small and not powerful enough to do work applications and need something for when I'm on the go. I only got it test, but so far, I am impressed (and that takes a lot for me)

Asides from that, the laptop is still going strong, with new laptops coming out that are small like the net book but a lot more powerful.

What else is on it's way? : s

I don't hate technology, I just miss my life before it. Calm and tranquil with the odd look at my phone a few times a day. Now I'm checking one of my gadgets at least once an hour through habit : s

It has made me more organised, but I feel like I spend my time now organising stuff rather than doing, which is just not fun!

It's funny, I was going to write this post days ago and then saw a similar post from another blogger I saw online. He calls it the ping and I would definitely suggest you check it out - it's SO true:

http://cheerfulegg.com/2012/06/06/revenge-of-the-ping/

Post title comes from this hilariously bad music video : p : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gWOzUzJd6wM

This post is for my pal Shez, who not only loves hilarious music videos like me but was the one who showed me this wonderful footage : )

"Round round, baby, round round..."

2012-06-03T15:42:00.000+01:00

It's a bit hard to tell from the title what today's post will be about, but it's Karl Pilkington, known as the "the little round-headed buffoon" by Ricky Gervais. There aren't any song titles with Karl Pilkington in, so I went with a song that reminded me of his head, lol.

Karl Pilkington came into my TV life a few years back when the first season of The Ricky Gervais Show was on. In all honesty, before this show, they're weren't many cartoon based comedies I liked (barring Family Guy), so it was my brother that convinced me to watch it.

I obviously knew of Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant because of The Office and Extras, but didn't know who this other person was and what to expect - no, I didn't even know about the radio show they used to have.

I have to say, I was pleasantly surprised. Not at Ricky Gervais taking the piss out of someone (we've all seen that before), but this seamlessly comic character, who even through constant ribbing from the other two, is just being honest about his thoughts.

I wouldn't try and re-create any of the conversations from season 1 (because it which just seem weird and wrong out of context) but I literally cried through some of the episodes at the randomness of some of Karl's responses. That and the fact that he would stick hard and fast to his views even when they didn't make sense - I applaud you sir!

After watching season 1, I then couldn't wait for season 2 and also the arrival of An Idiot Abroad (a Sky series where Karl gets sent by the other two to see the wonders of the world, even though he dislikes the idea of travel).

Karl is a pleasure to watch and always has a surprise up his sleeve: watch his funny but awkward interview with Warwick Davis and then in complete contrast, his more serious role in the pilot episode of Derek (One of Gervais's newest creations). He is an interesting person not to be misconstrued.

If you haven't experienced his wonder check out some of the things I've mentioned. He's not the "diamond in the rough" exactly, but more like the unusual pebble next to it that everyone's been ignoring because it's not shiny!

Bless Karl Pilkington for bringing a new edge to comedy and keep up the good work : )

Post title based on: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FHh86ySgKrA

Season 3 of The Ricky Gervais Show currently on 4oD: http://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-ricky-gervais-show/4od#3340026

"There's a light at the end of the tunnel"

2012-05-21T20:27:00.004+01:00

Hey all, I've been rubbish again at writing (if you saw what happens to me on the weeks I work on shows, you'd understand - it's working and sleeping pretty much, not even a drink at the pub : s)

But back to my usual stuff.

Now I think I did a blog on job hunting or something similar but this is a little different.

I have just finished working on the start of the UK tour for Starlight Express, one of my favourite shows of all time.

Let's go back to 1994 (if your my age, you'll remember it), Boyzone were popular, clothes were generally rather awful and the only reason Tony Blair was known was because he used to be the annoying miniature character in Spitting Image that always got shut out of 'adult' political meetings. That about sums it up (oh yeah and most importantly, Ant and Dec had already left Byker Grove because one of them got shot in the eye with a paintball when they took their goggles off - paintball is dangerous kids!)

Anyway, for me, 1994 was starting a new school I hated, dreaming about leaving (within a month of getting there) and loving my swimming and performance activities out of school (mainly due to escapism from education I think). My parents decided to take me and my brother to a West End show for my birthday. I knew nothing about Starlight Express, apart from all my parent's friends raved about it when they came round and said that we'd love it.

Little did they know how much!

I remember stepping into the auditorium, shocked by the vast space of the venue - I don't think I had been to a West End theatre before this - and the fact that there were tracks round the outside with barriers. For a kid that has roller-skates at home, this was exciting!

The show passed by very quickly and I just remember being in ore of the experience. It had everything that a tom-boyish kind of girl of my age wanted: the romantic storyline (in those days, I still believed everyone stayed with who they married - I still do, my friends are never getting divorced from their lovely spouses, I just haven't told them yet, lol), the excitement of skating round what was like a massive playground, catchy tunes that I would remember forever and awesome costumes - to me it was heaven! For my brother, there were great elements too (not to embarrass him : p): Women in tight costumes (he was about 8, so I don't want to know what he was thinking, but we'll say it for all the other men in the audience), strong male leads (not all gay, but manly), experienced roller skaters that you wanted to be like and a reasonably cool storyline (there was something for everyone).

I am not going to say that my career in Theatre started from that point, but it definitely had a major effect on what I wanted to do. Asides from constantly listening to the sound track at home and getting my brother to listen to it too and sing (that's what older sisters do : p), I knew I wanted to be in the industry. Originally I thought this meant learning to skate, become a model and generally perform, but this was just the lead up to everything else.

Skip forward to summer 2001, by now I had been through secondary and college (thank god, years I am glad passed) and due to a painful slip on my coccyx (something that caused back problems for the future), I was starting to wonder whether dance was now for me. I was currently a Student Dance Teacher at weekends, whilst also working in a Box Office and WHSmiths, but then I saw an advert that stood out in The Stage (which was currently cooler than it is now) "Front of House Assistants needed for the final shows of Starlight Express". I had recently gone with a friend to see the show, (after raving about it to her) but had no idea it was closing. Although I was sad it was going, I was more excited that jobs in the venue were available.

As soon as I could, I filled in the application and sent it off. Within a few weeks I had an interview and shortly after started : ) Now in no way would I say the job was glam (if you've ever worked Front of House and especially in the West End, you'll know what I mean) but I was hired by "The Really Useful Company" (Andrew Lloyd Webber owns this) and was working on one of the best shows I had ever seen. Pre-show and after show tasks were a blur, but the moments before the show as the lights went down were amazing. As much as I could, I asked to sit in and learnt the different Front of House positions for the auditorium (the best was downstairs where you either sat on the edge of the well - where they skate around in the middle of the stalls - or the outside barriers - where you had to open barriers at different points and sometimes got to say hi to the cast : p) The three months were tiring (I was working 4 jobs) but it went quickly and soon it was final night. The auditorium was packed, Andrew Lloyd Webber was in and my favourite show would soon be gone. (I had also managed to miss the famous photo, now in an archive somewhere, where everyone working on the last day stood on the rotating bridge for a photo - loads of us went on lunch and hadn't heard the announcement - still gutted today about that). In a blink of an eye, the show passed by and as I left the Apollo Victoria for the last time, I watched as the auditorium (seats and all) got ripped out as soon as the audience were gone (it was horrible!)

Years passed and every now and then I'd put on my favourite CD, but I was now moving from front of house to backstage and marketing and time just passed me by.

In 2007 I did see the tour of Starlight that they took out, but it wasn't that great and I missed the racing which made it different from any other show.

And now to present. Aged 29 and I get to dress on one of my top five ever shows - Starlight Express. I can't say the experience was exactly what I expected it to be, but one I'm glad I've had. Many of the cast had come from the last UK tour and from the German version (which has been going for about 2 decades), I knew some of the company and to see all the costumes, make-up and lighting up close was a dream come true. The show definitely looks better from out front though, I couldn't see anything much in the wings : (

But like many good things, it also proved to be the ending of one part of my working career, which will hopefully be the beginning of change (in a good way). I have been dressing on shows since 2003 (in between other stuff) and I have loved the people, shows and costumes I have had the chance to work with, but I know it is not for me anymore.

Although Starlights not quite my last dressing job, it's not far off now and the fact that I am being more open about it now means I want it more than anything (that's how I roll baby, lol).

I want to dedicate this post to all the wonderful people I have worked with over the years. (I'm not aiming to leave the industry but I will be in a different part of it). I have worked with some great, kind and famous cast members who have made it a pleasure to work with. But more so, I have worked with so many funny and hard working crew members, who are the reason I did this work as long as I did - it definitely wasn't for the pay, lol.

It may be the light at the end of THIS tunnel but there's more tunnels to be explored.

I leave you now with a few links below of Starlight Express - inspiration in a show!

A picture I took in the final week (it's in an old scrap book) of the fans who used to dress up in costumes they'd made and skate up and down outside the Apollo Victoria (right).

Post title inspired by this song from Starlight Express: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3sMwiL4GtM

My favourite song from the old show, that is no longer in it: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vAFVgMjXOko&feature=related

And if you want to catch it live now on the UK tour, here is a clip that was on BBC Breakfast a few weeks ago to advertise the start of the new tour: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzLS3UkOkxY&feature=related