"FREE YOUR MIND"

ADDICTION

2013-08-09T00:23:00.001+00:00

Far, far away I got lost in time,

Little did I know; of this journey

In as much as I wish to get home

Hitherto, the more impossible it seems

My destination is not difficult to preempt

Could you fault me when I’m only human?

All I only dreamt of is to quench this craving

Now here I stand, in the middle of nowhere

May be I know, May be I Know not

Now I’m privileged to know better

But Hey, no test, no testimonies

All I can say is, I wish I never took this trip.

Debatable is the perspective from various schools of thought that addiction is solely associated with deviant persons arising out of a deliberate act. I bet a differ, because this occurrence is natural in trait meaning any living thing is capable of exhibiting a peculiar kind of addiction or other; regardless of age, gender, status, color, race, species, literacy, creed , and so on… This nightmare doesn’t prevail merely as a result of doing bad but also as in good.

Ø Many questions but few candid answers in circulation out there; thus this article seeks to bridge the prevailing difference via demystifying and dissemination of shared knowledge and experiences on this site. “For the lack of knowledge people perish, he who doesn’t know will now know”.

Ø Have you ever been an addict? …

A very significant question to ask one’s self

I presume you did say “NO”; by which means you’re most likely to be wrong

WHAT IS ADDICTION?

It’s a rational behavioral trait of adapting to the over reliance on temporal satisfaction derived from exercising or usage of a peculiar instinct, activity, habit, belief or item; over a consistent period of time. This exists advertently or inadvertently and mostly substantially consequential; out of want or need. Definition and emphasis mine.

Now let’s take a cyclical analysis of how this behavioral trait originates and permeates.

Phenomenally, there are (7) stages the first of which is highlighted below;

1. NEEDS VS WANTS:

The foremost essential catalyst to this process and outcome has got to do with our want and need. Want and need always appear to impact the benefactor either temporarily or infinitely.

Have you ever pondered over the thought of your want and need not been the same? All other things being equal, I guess basic economics will settle with my view that at a defined point in time what a man want may not exactly be what he need and vice versa. No wonder Abraham Maslow’s theory is focused on needs and not wants. Needless to say, one man’s want may be another’s need and vice versa. Therefore, this assessment of need and want can only be done based on some specific factors which will be taken care of in my next article.

If the above is true, then it’s more eminent to segregate this two in order to forestall the prevalence of unfavorable outcomes arising out of wrong choices we make in life.

It’s therefore obvious why many prayers go unanswered or at best at latter. Because if it is written in

Mathew 7:7-11~ “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.8“For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.9“Or what man is there among you who, when his son asks for a loaf, will give him a stone?10“Or if he asks for a fish, he will not give him a snake, will he?11“If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is “GOOD” to those who ask Him! (NIV).

Then, surely something must account for the unanswered prayers. Well your guess is as good as mine. Worthy to note is that, many a time the devil has parochial interest in our want, no wonder he is the prince of this world. Sometimes the good Lord watches as we make this wrong choices just to punish humanity for leaning on our own understanding, that notwithstanding shows mercy at last.

In retrospect to the above mentioned, I will like to enumerate some few scenarios below;

I. Biblically, Adam and Eve chose the want of satisfying their curiosity over surviving on the need of knowing NO evil. The outcome obviously was very disastrous.

II. Samson decided to meet his sexual desire over the need of keeping secret his weakness. What happened? He fell terribly in the hands of the Philistines.

III. Judas decided to quench his greediness for money over the need of been a brother’s keeper. What happened? He became the bearer of great betrayal and a recipient of money he couldn’t even spend.

IV. In 2 Samuel 24:1-24, David decided to enumerate the army of Israel against the need of relying on the unwavering force of God behind the army. What happened? He incurred the wrath of God on a whole nation.

V. In today’s century, a young graduate desires to meet the want of buying fancy cars when even he hasn’t met his possible first need of shelter. What happens? He walks in the fast lane of robbery, drugs, fraud, blood money…

VI. How about a young enterprising family man so much in love with the quest for money. What happens? He forgets about his family, health, parenting, spiritual commitment etc… things go bad before he realizes.

VII. A preacher man follows his want of been seen so committed and responsible towards his flock. What happens? He neglects his wife to the exposure of other men, lack of parenting so children go wayward, broken home etc.

VIII. A man constantly wants to take bottles of alcoholic drink. What happens? He becomes a drunkard, acquires bad breathe & health and messes up his family.

IX. Is good to eat but too much of everything is bad. A man eats too much of a particular food and becomes a freaky eater who bloats and becomes health hazardous... (CHECK FREAKY EATERS TV DOCUMENTARY).

X. A young lady meets her want of dressing secularly instead of the need of taking good care of her appearances. What happens? She attracts unqualified suitors leading to series of sexual abuse, rape, heart break, teenage pregnancy, abortion, maternal death etc…

CONTRARY;

Joseph responded to the need of respecting and serving his master faithfully by not satisfying the queen’s sexual want. What happened? He went through a very painful ordeal but at last made a ruler of a foreign land, something I’m sure he neither desired wanting nor needing.

One fact remains; sometimes God in his own wisdom and mercy overlooks our wrong choices and still make us prosperous. Funny enough to note is that this is very rare. Typical example is what Josephs’ brothers did yet became immense beneficiaries of their wrong choice.

TRUE LIFE STORY:

A man spent 7 months showing affection towards a woman he wants but never received the reciprocal, he meets another in just 7days he receives great attention he has dreamt of all this while. The want was never met the whole 7 months because maybe it wasn’t a need for him then, now there is answered prayer because God knows he needs the affection now. What a mighty God we serve, he who answers to our needs and not to our wants; in his own chosen time.

BACK FOR GOOD, watch out for;

Ø FORMS OF ADDICTION

Ø HOW TO SEGREGATE NEED FROM WANT &

Ø HOW TO IDENTIFY AND CONTROL ADDICTION

Check these out;

http://www.cosmopolitan.co.uk/love-sex/celebrity-sex-addicts-97668

I’m admonishing everyone to be @liberty in sharing experiences & views on this page to encourage shared knowledge & solutions for the benefit of all.

Visit Website: ebenezer.adokwei@blogspot.com

“Unless a man learns to segregate his needs from wants, he will never prioritize right nor prosperitize”

~NII ADDO ADOKWEI~

"HAPPINESS O! HAPPINESS!"

2011-06-27T18:59:00.002+00:00

“STAYING ALIVE”

Happiness O! Happiness!

The moment I’ve so longed for

With you I lost the old me

But to something refreshing you gave in

Your praises will always remain on my lips

Happiness you’re the perfect friend.

Whenever misery steers me in the face

And life seems so lonely and long a journey to go,

You give me the reason to smile

And the strength to forge ahead

The only prize I’m willing to pay a price for

Happiness you’re priceless.

In the comfort zone of your arms

I will forever lay “n” stay

For you make me feel very alive and extraordinary

Much better than I can ever imagine

What else could I have wished for than this?

Happiness you’re the best.

In your dearest presence some say am crazy

That notwithstanding, I shun you not; stick “n” stay

For if putting smiles on my face, easing my pains

And show casing my joy to the world is so called “madness”

Then there is no fairness “n” justice in the world

Happiness you’re amazing.

"Possessing the whole world’s wealth without happiness is simply incompleteness"

- EBENEZER ADOKWEI -

"5" STEPS TO MIND LIBERATION

2011-04-29T17:47:00.000+00:00

“5” STEPS TO MIND LIBERATION

(S.S.D.D.A)

This post is specifically tailored to serve as a wake up call to anyone desiring to see life in a different bearing. Thus, I am admonishing all my readers not to only read but also practice and share this post with relations for maximum personal developments. As matter of fact this is just an introduction to the in-depth coverage which will be subsequently posted on my blog so stay tuned in for first hand information. Meanwhile thanks for visiting, reading and commenting

To kick start bringing into light this hidden treasure about the true power of the mind, I first dare to ask if it’s ever possible for anyone to achieve any form of progress in life whilst mentally flabby (out of shape)…?

I guess the answer will be affirmatively negative. I therefore believe this answer serves enough as a testament, why freeing the mind is very essential to daily developmental process.

Research has shown and proven that there is a little bit of mental disorder in everyone human thus, making us “non- 100% normal”; we all do have some form of disorder day in day out and is an undisputable fact. The following are some forms of disorders that can occur in every living creature in a matter of time;

Anxiety (e.g. fear, panic, obsessive-compulsive disorder etc.),

Mood or Emotional disorders (e.g. depression etc.),

Psychotic disorders (e.g. delusions, hallucinations, thought disorder etc.)

Personality disorders (e.g. paranoid, schizoid, antisocial, histrionic etc.)

Eating disorders (e.g. anorexia nervosa, exercise bulimia etc.)

Sleeping disorder (e.g. insomnia)

Sexual disorders (e.g. dyspareunia, gender identity disorder etc.)

Impulse disorders (e.g. Kleptomania, pyromania, gambling etc.)

Mental disorders (dependency on substances leading to drug abuse)

Developmental disorders (autism spectrum, conduct disorder, attention deficit etc.)

Somatoform disorders (e.g. conversion disorder, Neurasthenia etc)

Factitious disorder (e.g. Munchausen syndrome)

Relational disorder, self-defeating personality disorder, sadistic personality disorder, passive-aggressive personality disorder and premenstrual disorders and more are propping up just in a matter of time due to daily changes of occurrences in the milieu (environment).

Knowing the greater impact and relationship the mind shares with any form of disorder, I do like to discuss mind liberation process thereof to aid personal development. More so, other forms of disorders I believe are likely easy to be resolved unlike one’s relating to “the mind” which mostly deserves self cure as a starter; the perfect medicine never sold anywhere I quote from “free your mind”.

The mind plays a very critical role in our daily lives but needless to say has failed to gain the according recognition and appreciation due. It’s to this regard I deem it necessary expressing my views and opinion on here, as a writer who is passionate about life.

No wonder amongst the physically challenged the mentally unfit is seen to be the most unproductive to society, why because the brain is not in good shape to imagine or create anything useful for societal consumption. At least the blind can learn to walk, deaf learn sign languages etc… what of the “mentally challenged”? I leave that for your judgment my dear reader.

In summary, the dictionary defines “the mind” as a memory for remembrance, conscious thoughts, wishes and feel of a person’s state of being.

Inasmuch as I agree with this definition, in a different perspective I think the mind’s true worth as been greatly under-defined and under-mind respectively in one way or the other. To me, the mind is also “the greatest pool of asset any living being is gifted with, which posses the power of imagination and creativity never sold anywhere on the street or across the globe”.

“So brethren, no matter where you are or situation you find yourself in never allow anything imprison your power of creativity and imagination, free your mind and be productive”.

Below are some considerable steps in the mind liberation process, which in turn can foster personal growth and development;

1. SELF ACCEPTANCE OF THE PROBLEM;

(SINCEREITY):

Foremost is self acceptance of the problem, which is a generous act of sincerity to the mind. And I quote modified from free your mind; “a mind that is troubled is one that is insincere to its own self for one reason or the other”. I believe everyone will bear with me that where there is no problem, there is definitely no need of a solution. Simply put, for a person to desire discovering solutions to problems about his personal life or any other, he foremost must affirmatively confirm and admit the existence of such problems. That’s the only way solutions can be found and meted out. No wonder where there is a will, there is always a way. In furtherance to this, it goes a long way in augmenting the efforts of the mind liberation process.

2. SOMETIME AWAY FROM THE WORLD;

(SOLITUDE):

Secondly is the need of a moment away from the world, out of distraction. Solitude fosters a very serene platform for problems at hand to be unleashed. Individual personal experiences has shown that even relationships in time turns boring; why because the mind is fed up with capturing and sharing same old memories over and over again in the same atmosphere with same occurrences.

Thus, this necessitates the need for a trip or vacation to a different environment to experience and capture fresher moments even if just for a jiffy. The application of this in mind liberation is very vital because it craves room for a time of solace away from distraction; necessary enough to aid recollection and flashing out of haunting memories from the mindset.

It’s therefore advisable if the personality in question could eschew distraction by taking a moment away from work, family and friends to be able effectively kick start this process.

3. DUGOUT AND LIST OF THE PROBLEMS;

(DOCUMENTATION):

Thirdly are digging out and listing of the problem which is very important for easy trace of the issues. Documentation requires that the problems are reflected on, recollected and written down so as to ensure that no problem goes unidentified and unsolved.

One may ask why the need for documentation. I think it’s just proper to document the problems because humans as we are can be easily forgetful. So therefore, listing will serve as a source of easy reference or a blue print against actions to be taken during the liberation process. This I suggest should be placed on a scale or preference, order, urgency and priority.

4. UNDERSTANDING AND CLARIFICATION OF THE PROBLEM;

(DIAGNOSIS):

In fourth place is understanding and proper clarification of the problem which serves as a diagnosis step for the right solution to be meted out.

I believe that even when ones visit the infirmary for treatment, the doctor foremost diagnosis the patient’s illness before a prescription for cure is given. Diagnosis therefore is a very important step in mind liberation because it offers the personality in question the opportunity to determine the root of the problem for the right solution to be sought and affected.

Below are distinctively (10) roots through which a particular form of problem may arise;

1. FINANCIAL RELATED

2. MARRIAGE / RELATIONSHIP RELATED

3. EMOTIONAL RELATED

4. RELIGIOUS OR SPIRITUAL RELATED

5. FAMILY AFFAIRS

6. WORK / JOB RELATED

7. HEALTH RELATED

8. ACADEMIC AFFAIRS

9. PERSONAL ATTITUDE OR CHARACTER RELATED

10. SOCIAL LIFE RELATED.

Subsequently after the above has been accomplished, easier will it be tracing roots of the problem and addressing it accordingly with the appropriate measures or solutions.

5. DECISIVE ON EXPUNGING OR PROBLEM SOLVING;

(ACTIONS):

This step is the very last yet most crucial aspect amongst all. Because after all is said and done, decisions need to be taken and that’s what brings the turning point in one’s life. This can either be from better to worse or worse to better depending on the choice of solutions and action.

Truth need be told, decision making is the toughest task considering management of our daily lives; why because that always makes or unmakes anybody. This emphasizes why it’s not every leader who is a manager. It’s always the first step to the pros and cons of our daily lives, making it therefore very prudent for anyone to proceed at this juncture with a word of prayer before any furtherance step.

Inasmuch as we share different religions, one thing I know for sure is that we all have faith and believe in “One Supreme Being” who supersedes all… My faith tells me in JAMES 5:16 that, “the fervent prayer of the righteous availeth much”, so what about you? Call on yours.

Now coming back to the sub topic under discussion, it is my opinion that some problems arise to be negative haunting experiences in our lives, thus needing to be expunged from the mental system; whilst others are that which form part and parcel of our daily activities, needing well defined and tailored solutions.

“10” WAYS TO EXPUNGE PROBLEMS:

In retrospect therefore to expunging, the following are ten (10) tried, tested and effective activities that can be considered to aid the liberation process;

1. PRAYER

2. PRACTICE YOGA, ENOUGH REST AND SLEEP

3. CUT CONTACT WITH ALL ITEMS RELATED TO THE PROBLEM

4. AVOIDING CONSISTENT LONELINESS, BE ENGAGED IN AN ACTIVITY

5. TRY LISTENING TO INSPIRATIONAL MUSICS/MESSAGES

6. TRY TRAVEL, SIGHT AND NATURE VIEWING

7. PRACTICE A HOBBY LIKE COOKING, CHATTING, RESEARCHING etc.

8. TRY WATCHING GEOGRAPHIC AND COMEDY VIDEOS

9. ENGAGE IN OLD FONDLING GAMES AND EXERCISES

10. TRY ART WORKS LIKE READING, WRITING, BLOGGING, PHOTOGRAPHY, etc.

“5” WAYS TO PROBLEM SOLVING:

The following are five steps to be considered in problem solving;

1. PRAYER

2. SEEK PROFESSIONAL/ SPIRITUAL ADVICE

3. JOT DOWN POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS ON A SCALE OF EFFECTIVENESS

4. MAKE A CHOICE OF SOLUTION OUT OF MANY

5. SET YARDSTICKS TO EVALUATE AND MONITOR CHOICE OF ACTIONS

NOTE:

STAY CONNECTED FOR MORE “ELABORATED” VERSIONS OF DISORDERS TYPES, STEPS IN EXPUNGING AND PROBLEM SOLVING TECHNIQUES IN MY SUBSEQUENT POSTS. THANK YOU!!!

BY:

EBENEZER ADOKWEI

(EBENDY)

CONTACT: http://ebenezer-adokwei.blogspot.com , niiebenez@gmail.com

“FREE YOUR MIND!”

2011-04-12T15:49:00.003+00:00

“FREE YOUR MIND!”

Free your mind!!

Cease the moment now my dear good friend, free your mind!

I beseech thee, be not a slave of your past instead captain of a better day

For everyone needs somebody and sometime away from the world,

A time of solace to refresh the mind and embrace new memories

Why not you, you deserve better, free your mind!

Why always stay aggrieved and frown without a smile?

As if the whole world is crashing down on you.

Subsequently making you mentally unhealthy and lost;

As well pushing away all good things coming your way

Life is too short to be living in a world of illusions and trauma,

Free your mind!

Just in case you don’t know someone cares for your troubles

Blame it not all on you instead voice out those problems

Then you will know he cares, for that’s the true beauty of nature

No wonder “a problem shared is half solved”,

So go on free your mind and you did see it works like magic.

Momentarily,

Take a look at you now in the middle of nowhere and you think is cool?

Imprisoned too far away from reach but never late for redemption

You can do this, trust me, yes you can!

Cos if not you, no one else, free that mind!

Why make captive of your own self, a slavery of yesterday

When you can wear a smile in the face of adversities

For today may be dull but brighter the day after, live for tomorrow

The aftermath you will see very exhilarating, free your mind!

One thing I know for sure is that,

You were never born with it, yet you have to live with it.

Growing to meet it was no option either, nor was is it exceptional

Cos many suffered same syndrome but never died by it, so can you

Free your mind!!

“Life without challenges is not worth living” an author once opined

So don’t be so boiled up just because you can’t find your way out

For to every entry is and exit and every exit an entry

Only that you are looking too hard; relax, take a moment of rest

Free that mind and you did discover miracles.

Some things are true whether we choose to believe or not

Look at this mighty, bounty ocean afar

When it has problems what does it do?

I t doesn’t contain them, instead frees it all at shore

Learn from that, for “experience is the best tutor”

Free your mind!

Why as if hell is letting loose anytime I say…? You know what it is!

Never mind, free that mind because you need to

What matters at end is a message is carried out, free that mind now!

For as long as there is life, it’s a necessary evil worth daring

The earlier the better, later the worse it could be, free your mind!

It will make a lot of good to break that silence now,

Than face its hush consequences later, truth need be told!

For a mind that’s distorted is one fed up with insincerity to its own self,

Such mind will never be at peace unless it is freed, so free that mind!

And when all is said and done, don’t go back blaming

Cos trying to visit closed doors, can cost opened doors ahead, free your mind!

Whew! Alas it has paid off, very recuperating it is

The perfect medicine never sold or sought for in any infirmary

O yes it is, free your mind!

For it sets you free of all those nightmares killing you softly

Just like a bird set free from a cage of death,

Such a bird! A moment out is like forever in paradise, free that mind!

Now against all odds, yet you stand tall

Cos you live for the truth and that shall set you free

For the truth needs no “spectacles”, it’s unique

Though it may take longer to unveil itself but never forever,

Free your mind!

NB:

Kindly stay in touch for the real stuff; “5” steps to mind liberation.

Will be posted on Friday. Thanks!!

BY:

EBENEZER ADOKWEI,

(EBENDY).