INTROSPECTION...

2010.

2010-12-31T08:48:00.000-08:00

2day is d last day of dis yr 2010...dis yr has not been very gud 2 me but since it has not been very bad either...NO REGRETS!!!
I've went through so much dis yrbut then i think it was all a part f God's plan 2 make me a wiser person :)
2day i've d answers 2 a lot f questions i've asked myself in d past(except 1 :-P)
some f d gud things dat happened 2 me dis yr are:-

i made many gud frnds (frnds i can count on)...:)
some old frnds wid whom i'd lost touch came back in my lyf...wonderful:)
i understood d importance f luv n detachment n also how both can co-exist.
i learnt new things(technically)
i discovered how much i luv marketing :)
i'd d best birthday celebration evr!!
i luv pune city <3..n m trhankful i got a chance 2 b there.
went 2 SHIRDI!!!(d best thin dat happened 2 me dis yr)

things datwent wrong:-

lost touch wid sum1 i've always admired n idolised :-(
i did hurt d feelings f a vry dear frnd
i lied 4 sumthin i shudnt have
cudnt tell d person who meant so much 2 me :-(

dis yr has not been dat bat afterall :-P:-)

THANK U GOD 4 A WONDERFUL YEAR :-)

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE:-)

dis year lets make d world a better place 2 live in...spread smiles:-):-)

GOD BLESS ALL!!

this is 4 u my friends:)

2010-12-10T04:48:00.000-08:00

this blog is 4 u..my friends!!
when i moved 2 pune i never knew i wud blessed wid such wonderful friends:)
thnk u..4 making everyday so much fun:)
thnk u..4 accepting me d way i am
thnk u...4 caring so much
thnk u...4 ur unconditional love
thnk u..4 4giving me 4 all my mistakes
thnk u...4 making me laugh n cry wid joy
thnk u...4 sharing everything
thnk u...4 being there

m missing u all here at home...hope 2 meet u ppl vry soon...d coming year is going 2 b d best year f our lyf so let us rejoice each moment...so that when v r depart v hv memories 2 cherish 4 lyf:)

HYMN TO ISIS(3rd or 4th century b.c.)

2010-11-15T21:16:00.000-08:00

for i am the first and the last,
i am the venerated and the despised,
i am the prostitute and the saint,
i am the wife and the virgin,
i am the mother and the daughter,
i am the arms of my mother,
i am barren and my children are many,
i am the married woman and the spinster,
i am the woman who gives birth and who never procreated,
i am the consolation for the pain of birth,
i am the wife and the husband,
it was my man who created me,
i am the mother of my father,
i am the sister of my husband,and he is my rejected son;
always respect me
for i am the shameful and the magnificient one

p.s.discovered on nag hammad,taken from"11 minutes" by:paulo coelho

the secret.

2010-11-07T22:53:00.000-08:00

the secret...by rhonda byrne talks about the secret law of attraction,that has unveiled itself after centuries.the secret has been understood by some of the most prominent men in history:plato,galileo,beethoven,edison,carnegie,einstein.

it is wonderful book which talks about how u can change ur destiny by changing ur thoughts.this is something v hv always known bt the book puts it in a way which will make u feel as if u hv actually unveiled a deep,dark,highly coveted secret!

the book tells us:

the gr8 secet f lyf is d law of attraction.
d law f attraction says lyk attracts lyk.
thots r magnetic.
thots hv a frequency.
v r a human transmission tower,transmitting a frequency wid our thots n attractin things dat r on d same frequency wid our thots.
if u want 2 change anything in ur lyf,change the frequency by changing the thots.
ur current thots r creatin ur future lyf.wot u think abt d most will appear as ur lyf.
ur thots bcum things.
xpectation is a powerful attractive force.
your job is u.unless u fill urself up first,u hv nothin 2 giv 2 anybody.

these r the mantras that will make ur lyf a lot easier...it has made mine!!
i hope this will help ppl who read this in howevr small way it can!
may God bless all...may the joy b wid u!!

all that i ever wanted to say!!

2010-11-04T02:40:00.000-07:00

it's always so easy to flirt...so easy 2 wink n say thigs u don't really mean,
but Y is it so tough to luk sum1 u luv in d eye n say things,dat mean d most 2 u...
may b dis is wots called love...never easy n weird!!!..i wish i had said it then...

if i had been a noun,
you would have been my adjective.

if i had been water,
you would have been my sea.

if i had been a rock,
you would have been my mountain.

if i had been a brick,
you would have been the facade.

if i had been a body,
you would have been the soul.

if i had been you,
you would have been me.

DIS RAIN...

2010-10-04T05:23:00.000-07:00

Dis rain...hw i luv dis rain!! ever since i was a kid i have felt a special connection wid God whenever it rains..its lyk God being onlyn:)
dese rains r always so promising...dey promise a new beginning!!
i have always felt dis way...rains have always been special to me...besides i was born on a rainy day which makes it all d more special:)
m sitting by my window...its gonna rain now...m so excited:)
i was doin my economics assignment,it was important...but i still took out my lappy to write dis blog...dis was important 2!!
dere r tyms when u want 2 share so much bt nobody is around,bt paper(rather word pad:P)is always so patient..
it looks so beautiful when its goin to rain,dere r black clouds all over n den suddenly sun peeps out 4 a moment:)...its beautiful...it really is...atleast i luv it:)
dis makes me recall 25july,2009..about a year back....wot a day it was!...it was special...it really was...i still recall dat day whenever it rains...it fills me wid hope:)
i wish dose days cum back...all is so different now...m missing ranchi!!
i believe things change 4 d bettter jst as dey have changed now!
i luv my lyf anyways:)..........

jst anothr day...

2010-09-26T05:22:00.000-07:00

its a lovely evening...it rained in d aftrnoon...dis is jst another day in the hostel...watched 2 movies 2day--aisha n the notebook....sonam kapoor looks really stylish in aisha n notebook was an amazingly romantic movie...luvd it:)..hd a nyc day,bt somehow feeling sick nw!
my frnds goin out 4 tea,m nt feelin lyk goin.i kno m gonna hv a tough tym convincing dem 2 leave me alone 4 sum tym...dz frndz na!!...hehe...bt i luv dem:)
spent d whole day alone...bt m bein greedy nw...want a lil more loneliness:D
sumtyms it feels gud 2 b alone!!...last nyt i saw my grandparents in my dream...wat a couple dey were...romeo-juliet:)...may dere soul rest in peace n dey find each other again:)..BREAK.

HAD 2 go out wid frnds...u cant win dem ovr:)...2day i read sum1's blog..whose blog i read almost everyday:)...i know dere is nothing fantastic abt dis..bt dis is my lyf...my blog n dis is spcl 2 me!
2day i ws feeling dat lyf wud hv been so much better only if i knew wot 2 do wid it!..strange thot na!
i have an ordinary lyf....dere is nothing gr8 abt it...i kno dat!..bt my story will b gr8 1 day...i kno dat2!...things will change n they will change 4 good...n dat i kno coz i hv alwys got wot i wanted,i jst hv 2 want it enuf...n nw i want a change!!
signing off.

faith

2010-09-22T10:22:00.000-07:00

it all started with faith...a faith in myself...a faith in my dreams...
dat ws d worst part of my lyf....my world collapsing all around me...
dere ws no hope,bt dere ws faith....a faith dat...i deserve a better lyf....i didnt kno where it came 4m,bt it ws dere...i knew i was blessed!
it ws den dat u happened 2 me...i alwys knew u were d 1...i dont know wot made me feel so...bt i felt so...
d acceptance ws nt easy...bt it happened gradually...
i knew i cud nvr let u kno dis...v were 2 diff ppl in 2 diff worlds....
bt it was within me...n den love ws born...
i hv been livin in bliss since den...my world changed...
it doesnt matter 2 me if i hv still nt told u abt dis....n it wont matter 2 me if i nvr do...
its a feelin above expression...its faith!!

i wish...

2010-09-22T10:10:00.000-07:00

i wish i cud tell u dat i missed u all dis while....i wish i cud tell u hw incomplete it felt....

i wish i cud tell u dat u r d best thing dat evr happened 2 me.....i wish i cud tell u dat u hv been my inspiration evr since i hv known u...

i wish i cud tell u dat all my days start wid ur thoughts....i wish u were closer....

i wish dz tyms were different....i wish those tyms were different...

i wish i cud look u in d eye n say this...

i wish i cud say....i love u!

trivial...

2010-08-03T05:01:00.000-07:00

dis is my blog...n since nobody reads it,i can write in2 it,whatevr bullshit i want!!...dis is jst another day at siom,bt i feel lyk a diff. person...d change is happening...i can feel it happening...its gr8:)..i can feel d positivity around...baba is again smiling down at me...m calm...its beautiful!!

i wanted 2 share this though....i dont know wid whom...but i feel lyk sharing.so, m writing it down...lets c where it reaches!!...its lonely...it really is n i dont know 4 how long...........

ASPIRATIONS

2010-04-06T00:52:00.000-07:00

By d grace of d almighty2day i realised dat happiness is nt d most imp. thing in my lyf.once someone asked me"wot do u want in lyf?"n i said"happines".2day i realise it was so foolish of me 2 ve said dat,nobody in this world can want jst happiness in his life n nothing else,life wud b incomplete then.happiness is nt an aim,it is a consequence,a consequence of a series of events or particular event felt by our senses.as we all know d scope of our senses is limited and is unaware d gr8ness of lyf.it is imp. 2 know our aim,purpose in lyf and then nt jst base it on happiness.so,be careful of ur aspirations.when u r haPPY:)...jst b happy njoy n den undrstnd dis is nt wot u were born 4..set a goal n when u strt walking 2wards it...it wont always b easy,bt once u reach there u'll xperience something more than jst happiness,u'll feel content n dis adds meaning 2 ur lyf n a million othr people!!

meri marzee....:P:)

2010-03-21T11:15:00.003-07:00

Bahut dino se....i havent spent tym wid myself n 2nyt, i plan 2.

i've 2 catch up on a lot of thinking 2nyt...sumthng i luv 2 do n sumthing i ve nt done 4 a long-long tym.all dis while i've jst nt been myself.i've been sum1 else,sum1 i jst dont recognise now..i wasnt dis person!!...who is she??...she isnt me...she is sum1 i wud hv lykd 2 b...but den, she is nt me...d real me needs 2 surface now...its high tym!!...i need 2 surface b4 she taks ovr!!

ye raat kuchh alag hai...dis nyt is special n m sure when i'll look back at it aftr yrs. i'll be glad dat such a nyt came in my lyf!...aftr yrs. of speculation(2yrs. 2 b precise),i 've cum 2 d conclusion dat d only thing dat matters in dis whole wide world is ME....yes!!...itsme!!..its me n my desires,my dreams,my work,my goals,my feelings,my wants,my hopes,my joys,my heartbreaks,my pain n above all my faith...its me all ovr!!...main hoon to sab hai,main nhi to kuchh nhi.so,2day i resolve 2 worship myself coz my God resides in me.i resolve 2 do justice 2 myself n d justice of d world lies in d hands of my Lord.it s in loving urself dat luv reveals itself n u r able 2 luv d people around u n give much more 2 d world.ur contribution doubles.2day i pray 2 my Lord..my Sainath 2 give me d strength 2 luv myself above everything else...its nt easy i tell u!!

in schools n colleges,everywhere v r taught 2 luv our fellowmen...nowhere r v taught 2 luv ourselves...try luving urself...u ll find GOD.all dz yrs i ve learnt jst 2 luv othrs it ws nvr me...poor me...2nyt i appologise 2 myself...I M SORRY!!!

After all dis introspection n contemplation...i found out,d simple funda 2 liv lyf is "luv urslf"."nothing matters 2 me more than ME".
IF DIS WORLD IS A STAGE, I'M PREPARED 2 GIVE A POWER-PACKED PERFORMANCE,MY FRENDS!!...WATCH OUT!!

THE HIGHEST THING....

2009-06-22T03:19:00.000-07:00

THE HIGHEST THING IN A MAN IS NOT HIS GOD
BUT IT IS THAT THING IN HIM WHICH KNOWS,
THE REVERENCE DUE GOD N U......ARE MY HIGHEST REVERENCE......

A COZY ROOM

2009-06-02T01:20:00.000-07:00

a cozy room is all i want;
with books to read
and thoughts to feed
a pen to write,
with all its might.
a window through which passes sunlight.

a pillow to weep;
when the world does sleep
a quilt that is warm,
a place where noone can harm.

a door through which passes no evil
all angels,no devil.
a silent moment,
when i can think.
thoughts all pure
in which i could sink.

a place where love is all pervading;
where hatred and vengeance,
seem to be fading.

there's a small wish God,
can u grant?

a cozy room is all i want...

WHAT DO I WRITE?

2009-06-02T01:12:00.000-07:00

I'm trying hard,something to write,
with all my might.
my inspirations are at their height;
but what do i write?

it feels lonesome,it feels so sad,
i wonder if i have gone mad.
where do i go?
what do i do?
there are some questions in my mind ,
of various kind.
i've left everything behind.

now on a new path i've to tread,
a thing,i dont regret.
there is so much to say,there's so much to do
but what to start with...i dont know...

i need a hand,i need a light.
i need a pen,with all its might
i'm trying hard,something to write.
my inspirations are at their height
but....what do i write???

WHEN U R ALONE.....

2009-05-15T05:23:00.000-07:00

when u r alone;
n u sit by ur side.
wot do u find?
wot comes 2 ur mind?
who is ur own?
in d people u 've known.
why sorrows stay n people betray;
why do u 've just tears 2 shed n things 2 regret?
why r ur wishes always killed ?
n dreams nvr fulfilled

when u r alone ;
n u sit by ur side.
wot do u find?
wot comes 2 ur mind?
why do u weep when d world does sleep?
why do u fight urself day n night;
with all ur might n a little fright.
why do people alwys criticize u?
so,evry moment passing by does minimize u.
why times change?
n people do
why everything changes but not u?

when u r alone;
n u sit by ur side.
wot do u find?
wot comes 2 ur mind?
wot i've 2 say is
go ur own way
pay no heed 2 wot people say
they have said
n they'll always say
walk ur way
n always be gay(happy)

n when u r alone n u sit by ur side
try 2 find within ur mind
that u r free n will always be....!

THIS SUMMER

2009-04-27T02:45:00.000-07:00

this summer,i'm here
another one......n i'll be somewhere
somewhere......away from here
people.....to care
things......to share
feelings.....to feel
wounds....to heal

this summer,i'm here
another one.....and i'll be somewhere
i dont know where i would be
things i would do and those i would see.
come...whatever may,but i'll be me
but,what comes my way
that is in store for me to see

this summer,i'm here
another one.....and i'll be somewhere!

THATS MY WISH

2009-04-27T02:38:00.000-07:00

let love be my sun
let happiness be all pervading
let warmth be in the cloud
friends all around
hearts full of love
minds full of thoughts
thoughts all good and pure
joy more than souls can endure
sweet little angels all around
flowers blooming on the ground
a colorful rainbow in the sky
wonderful ideas that take u high
twinkling stars and the moon
a promise that they made
will be fulfilled soon
that's my wish
that's all that is wanted
i wonder when this wish will be granted

DISILLUSIONED

2009-04-15T04:51:00.001-07:00

i thought i was happy
but then i was not
i thought i was there
but then i was not
i dont know wot happened
i dont know wot went wrong
my heart is lamenting n singing a song
i'm shattered m, i'm alone
that dream is long gone....!

U N I

2009-04-15T04:34:00.000-07:00

my existence is an adjective n u my noun
i'm the imprint n u r my nostalgia
i'm the resonance n u r my emotional string
i'm words n u my language
i'm music n u r my melody
i'm the mood n u my temperament
i'm freedom n u my respect
i'm season n u my change
i'm fever n u r my heat
i'm monotony n u my vacation
i'm inertia n u r my motion
i'm a crevasse n u my depth
i'm the parched earth n u my monsoon
i'm above all,the creation n u my destiny!

(p.s. the extract is taken 4m a book n is not my personal creation.though i hated the book,i loved this.so,i'd 2 put it on my blog)

dreaming!

2009-03-31T23:24:00.001-07:00

GOD IS PURE

2009-03-31T02:43:00.001-07:00

u created me pure
u sent me pure
i was spoileed here for sure

i made mistakes and blunders
u made me know this through storms and thunders
u fogave me,but
i know i acted like a slut
but i'm ur child
i know ur heart is mild
i know there r tears in ur eyes as in mine
i know,for me,u pine
i know u miss me
the winds told me,this,which often come to kiss me

u r kind
i'm yours and u r mine
to betray u, i dare not
about the thoughtless world,i care not
u r there for me whenever i fall
u r responsible for every rise and downfall

u wipe my tears and u hug me gently
u come in disguises but i know u mentally
ours is a bond of souls
that is what to you,me,holds

i thank u God,for all the happiness and joy
i'm grateful to mu
in a sense above the world and sky
but there is a wish
whenever u hear
receive me pure like u sent me here.

ETERNAL LOVE

2009-03-31T02:36:00.000-07:00

"I LOVE THEE TO THE LEVEL OF EVERYDAY'S MOST QUIET NEED,BY SUN AND CANDLELIGHT......"

INSPIRATION

2009-03-31T02:19:00.001-07:00

u r an inspiration
u r a desperation
u r sunshine
u r my rainbow
u r the sweetest,that i know

u r a dream
u r a reality
u r happiness
u r joy
u r so much to me,o boy!

u r love
u r pure
u r sacred,thats for sure

there r questions and answera
there r jokes and jingles
though u r humble
but its tough to even mumble,
when u r there
do u care?

i look up to u
thats something known
but do u look to my side
that is still unknown

i like u with my soul and heart
believe it or not
ur thoughts will dwell in my soul
even when i'm not.

AGONY OF LIFE

2009-03-22T00:00:00.001-07:00

TERRORISM IS THE DIRTIEST THING IN THE WORLD. I ONCE SAW A DEVASTATED WOMAN IN A PHOTOGRAPH WHOSE FAMILY WAS KILLED DURING ONE SUCH TERRORIST ATTACK.A MUSLIM WOMAN WAS SHE....WITH HER FACE VEILED.IT WAS THEN THAT I REALISED HOW WRONG PEOPLE R WHEN THEY BRAND ALL MUSLIMS AS TERRORISTS.TERRORISM DOESNT HAVE A RELIGION.I COULD THEN IMAGINE THE MENTAL STATUS OF THAT WOMAN..HOW WOULDSHE,SEE THE WORLD...THIS IS WHAT CAME TO MY MIND........

FATE HAS BEEN SO UNKIND
I WONDER IF GOD IS BLIND
MY TEARS ARE CONCEALED
MY FACE VEILED
THE AGONY OF LIFE
FOR LIFE WE STRIVE
A RIVER WITHOUT BANKS
NOT A SEA TO MEET.
DRY SAND,INTENSE HEAT!
DANGER N DARKNESS PREVAIL.
HOW MANY TIMES DID I FAIL?
I ACHED N YEARNED
MANY FACES TURNED
BUT NONE TO HELP
ALL CONSUMED IN THEIR SELF
THERE R DARK CLOUDS
BUT NO SILVER LINE
BUT I'M SO USED TO IT
THAT EVERYTHING IS FINE
LOVE N PEACE HAVE NO PLACE TO BE
FOR ME MY WORLD IS UGLY
AND WILL ALWAYS BE.