Life, Day by Day

Love Me Forever, A Parent's Love

2024-01-22T11:47:00.008+08:00

While we were browsing at a bookstore, my son who was a pre-teen then found this little story about a mother and her son, and showed it to me. It was a touching read but looking at the price, I thought it was too expensive for a children's book...so we put it back. But I never forgot the story. As my son grew up, I would remember the story and wish that I bought the book. Last February, I was tasked to give a talk on "honoring our parents". As I was preparing my slides, I thought about the message of that book and how apt it would be for my talk. However, the only thing I can remember was the story line, the picture on the cover and nothing else. So I started searching on the internet...and many hours later, I found it...Thank God that today everything is in the internet! The book is "Love me Forever" by Robert Munsch. Here is a video presentation taken from YouTube.

After my talk, I showed this video and needless to say, there were not a lot of dry eyes left. That's because this book tells us of what we all experience...and that is the love of a parent, especially that of a mommy. All of us were once babies, then toddlers, then teens, then adults and parents too, and we can all relate to the story. My son is now 33 with a family of his own, but I still wait up for him till he gets home. Yes, they live with me after marriage and I am glad that they do, otherwise my house would not be a home. My mom passed on in 2019 but she experienced being a doting great grandma for more than a year. I miss her and her protectiveness of me, and support of everything I do, and was always there for me, no matter what. In fact, one reason why I am sharing about this book, is because I continue to experience my mother's love every day of my life even if she is no longer physically around. She has selflessly given me financial support while I was out of a job, even without my asking. I am the kind of parent that I am now because of the kind of parents I had. My mom was and always be my hero. And so, raising children and having taken care of an aging mother, I know what this book is all about. It is reminding us that there is no retirement from parenthood. I too will forever be a mom to my kids no matter how old they get. And as an adult whose mother needed physical help as she reached her twilight years, it was a great privilege for me to honor and care for her. Our parents love us without measure...can we do the same for our parents?

I'll love you forever,
I'll like you for always,
As long as I'm living
my baby you'll be.

I'll love you forever,

I'll like you for always,

As long as I'm living

my Mommy you'll be.

Disclaimer: First published in 2012, Updated in 2024

Retirement Story: Realizations, A Year And Seven Months After

2022-11-09T13:07:00.444+08:00

After retirement in April 2021, I heartily said...It is ME time, but a year & seven months after...NOPE, not really.

When I ended my time spent on all the bureaucratic maze of government service, I thought...this is it, finally Freedom. But you know what, all that is an illusion because I just got busier...at home. With what, one might ask...with everything...EVERY LITTLE and BIG THING. All of a sudden, I was at home everyday, available within sight any time, with no clear schedule for my day. This is the first time in 60 years that this (I am home the whole day & night) happened. I started school at age 6, and I began working right off college, until mandatory retirement. Unlike my Mom who both managed work, home, and children, I was all work and play. When she passed in 2019, I was still out at work the whole day, and although now I had to run the household, work was still the priority. Looking back these last 19 months of being at home almost 24/7, I am at awe at how my mother managed everything, how she was able to balance her life in spite of all the challenges and trials she faced in all aspects along the way. What was her superpower?

Well, I suppose most mothers have some kind of superpower one way or another. I only know that my mother is a hard act to follow. Having all these time in my hands makes me often think what would Mommie say or do when I hit roadblocks or family issues that need quick resolution. There are several things about me that I realized after being housebound. I am sure there is so much more, if you ask my family or the people around me. But first, these:

One, I like to put some order and system in my life.

Two, I find solace in solitude. I have learned how to isolate myself from life's toxicity.

Three, Time management is important to get things done on time. First things, first is now my motto.

Four, I have developed a bad habit: procrastination. But then, what is not essential, can wait.

Five, I still nag but, now in a gentler way.

Six, I have become more accepting and tolerant and forgiving.

Seven, I am now more mindful and prayerful.

Eight, my family is my life, everything except God, comes second.

Nine, Our happiness is never dependent on things and other people.

Ten, I have become a lot like my mother (& my father, but to a lesser extent).

PS. To all my friends who stay & work at home, Bravo!

Sisters Reunited in Heaven

2021-08-03T12:22:00.221+08:00

My Mom and Tita Mimi were very close, being the only 2 sisters among 4 brothers, both born in Cebu while the 3 younger boys were Manila-born. Tita Mimi at 3 years old suffered complications from measles and had special needs, so Mom always gave her special attention.

Their first separation happened unexpectedly when Mom got married in 1955 right after college graduation when she just turned 21, to a "probinsyano", leaving her family in Pasay City, and moved to Silay in Negros Occidental. In 1956, my parents went back to Manila because my Dad was preparing for the bar exams and my mom was due to give birth to me. I was the oldest grandchild (in both sets of grandparents) for almost 4 years, so you can imagine the adoration I got while growing up. At the same time, I was raised aware of my responsibilities because of that family “position”. So that when Lola Esting was diagnosed with cancer in 1988, she decided to have a tiny house built besides ours in Silay, to ensure the continuing care of Tita Mimi. When Lola died in 1990, Tita Mimi opted to stay in their tiny home with her helpers while Mom provided for her meals and upkeep. Then Daddy at age 58, had a massive heart attack, and passed only 4 months after Lola. Mom then decided to have Tita Mimi moved in with us. She was spoilt and contented being with her Manang. She would get visits from her brothers now and then, but being with her Manang Linda was what made her the happiest. Mom worried over, provided for and pampered her like never before.

2016

The second and final separation came after living together this time in Silay, for 29 years, when Mommie passed on at age 85 in 2019. This time, it was not unexpected and by now, I was the main caregiver of the family. Although Tita Mimi was prepared for Mom’s passing, it was obvious that she missed Mom terribly. Mom was always around, checking on her, talking with her even if she (Mom) could not really understand what she was saying. Mom looked after her personally, empathizing with her, assuring her, seeing that all her needs and wants are met. When Mommie passed on, all that diminished… Yes, she was not alone, but she was lonely. Even with caregivers around, it was never the same as when her Manang Linda was just there. And so for the last 2 years, Tita Mimi continued to pray, patiently waiting to join her Mamá, Papá, Manang Linda, Alex, Raul and Baby Newton in heaven. Last Friday, July 30, 2021 at 2 PM, her dream and hope to be happily reunited with them all, finally came. God quietly took her home. Her doctors after her bout with measles encephalitis just before WWII said "she will not live beyond her teen years". Well, at 84 years of age, she outlived them all (and may I add, vaccinated and Covid-free).

Tita Mimi has been laid in her earthly resting place yesterday, August 2, 2021 beside her parents Lola Esting and Lolo Bitong, Tito Raul and Mom (and Dad). Eternal Rest grant unto them, O Lord and let Perpetual light shine upon them. May they rest in peace.

Tita Mimi's story:

https://www.iamhangingtough.com/2012/04/living-with-disability-my-mothers.html

Retirement Story: Cheers to Retirement!

2021-06-12T20:36:00.334+08:00

What is it about the word "retirement" that make some people afraid? Not me, because after 39 years, it's Cheers to retirement! When my mandatory retirement from government service finally arrived, I was so excited that weeks before, I could not fully concentrate on work anymore. I was counting the days and literally daydreaming about the things I wanted to do.

Where did time go? Looking back to my years of working for the government, it seems like one long roller coaster ride that was mostly fun, sometimes scary but, it is finally over. Phew! Would I do it again? Honestly, I really don't know. I am quite ambiguous about this, because I love the concept of working for people and making a difference in creating a better life for others. But on the other hand, working in government is hard and thankless...you either take it or leave it. Obviously, I took it...39 long years. The bureaucracy and politics can defeat you, and make you give up on all your hopes and dreams of better government. It takes a lot out of you, not just guts, but blood, sweat and tears. I was raised to be a strong and principled person, that is why I stayed in the face of all kinds of challenges, because my commitment to service, was greater than anything thrown at me. Of course, there were also many victories won and positive changes happened, which only resulted in what I have always wished and worked for, and that is to deliver better health services for our patients.

I leave government service not without any regrets, because there have been many times when I said to myself, I should have done better. But, Life has a way of turning things around, all for the good of all, and so, I leave with a happy heart, knowing that the hospital is in good hands. I may not say this, but the TLJPH staff makes me very proud, they are a force to reckon with. I am honored and so touched when they prepared this retirement presentation for me that I will unabashedly share here.

https://youtu.be/haDDtY7a_sw

To everyone...Thank you for the memories. I will always cherish this.

Cheers to Retirement!

My Journey In Government - A Short Story

2021-03-31T15:24:00.003+08:00

My work as a civil servant will be ending soon. I have served for 39 years...why so long, what made me stay? Well, for a thousand reasons that I will share in future posts. Right now, it is apt that I end my journey with a short story of my time in government, first as a resident physician, then as a hospital chief.

I started working for government in 1982. When I applied in the general hospital of our small city, my intention was far from altruistic. The reality was, I was waiting for a residency slot in Internal Medicine at the medical center I wanted to get into. The general hospital was only about 2 blocks away from my home and compensation was good, so I thought, why not? I was not planning to stay for long, but then life (and God) works in mysterious ways, that soon I was having a change of heart. For the first time in my adult life I felt I was in a good place doing what I am meant to do. Although I could not fully see yet what I wanted to happen in my life, I began to feel that this is the direction I should take. I talked with my parents, my mentors, and they all said the same thing...to follow my heart. And so, my real journey began.

My first year was very trying because of many factors. As a new and young doctor, it was difficult to be among older physicians and staff with set ways and fixed mindsets. But after a year, younger doctors joined the medical staff which made things a lot easier. After 2 years as a resident physician, I had the opportunity of going the the Philippine Heart Center for in-service training. I spent 4 months there, coming home with a realization that I am not meant for any specialization. I live in a place where people need access to doctors who can attend to their basic health needs. That does not require any specialization.

In 1986, I applied to attend the Masters in Hospital Administration program of the UP School of Public Health. Unfortunately, I was considered by my then hospital chief as too young and inexperienced. But that did not daunt me. During this time, the hospital was still with the national government and any study grant should be approved by the DoH/MoH. I decided to enroll in the MBA program of the University of St. La Salle, with no government scholarship or permission, using my own resources and attending school only on my hours off. Then in 1991, devolution happened because of the Local Government Code, and by 1993 the position of Chief of Hospital was declared vacant after transitioning from national to local government. I am one of many who applied for the position, but the only one armed with an MBA. I was appointed in 1995 and the rest is "history", as the old saying goes.

My real "Baptism of Fire" in government service began when I became hospital chief. I knew that hospital management was a big job and being a government-run institution, bureaucracy is your biggest problem. Still, most aspects of running a hospital are demanding but not insurmountable. What I did not foresee was the human resource demands and challenges that went with it. When I was appointed, we were a small hospital of about 100 personnel. Today, 26 years after, there are more than 600 hospital personnel comprising of regular, casual, contract of service and job orders. Can you picture it? Of all the roles and responsibilities I had as Chief of Hospital, managing people was the most difficult to overcome. Human behavior is so complex and people react differently to situations. The emotional, physical and mental issues have to be managed carefully, otherwise there could be dire consequences. On several occasions I have acted as conflict mediator, marriage and guidance counselor, debt recovery consultant, et al. I draw the line at lending services.

I have reached the end of my journey in government. Do I have any regrets? There were many good times, but it was all hard work. Looking back, the whole journey can be compared to a roller coaster ride...a lot of ups and downs, and if you're like me (a strong person who is scared of heights)...you do it once, and never again.

Parental Tips: How To Cope With Schooling In The " New Normal"

2021-03-23T16:47:00.001+08:00

When the Covid19 global outbreak was declared a pandemic in March 2020, everyone thought that this will last about 3 months at most. Well, that was 12 months ago with no end in sight. Today, life has changed for everyone, and many of the things we take for granted are no longer easy to do. Take schooling, for instance. My preteen daughter was so looking forward to Junior High at a new and bigger school. Then Covid19 happened and government suspended opening of classes all over the country. A "new normal" was implemented, and when school finally opened in August last year (October for public schools), there was a shift from face to face classes to online learning which may continue even until the next school year. To say that she was not prepared for this is an understatement, and neither was I.

The saying " be careful what you wish for" is so true for me in this case, because the fact is, I used to mull over the idea of homeschooling for my daughter, but my late mother who was an educator rejected the idea for relatively valid reasons. But life is full of surprises. Since the pandemic happened and face to face schooling was suspended, the option was either to home-school or enroll her in a regular school which offers an alternative learning system. I did the latter, since I am not open to her taking time off primarily because I would like my child to enter college by the time she turns 18. Besides that, I know I am going to be a terrible home schooling mom.

Having decided that, the school we chose (where she was accepted as an incoming freshman) implemented a purely online learning approach with both synchronous and asynchronous sessions from Tuesday to Friday. I have a full time job on top of my many other responsibilities, and there is just nobody at home who has the capacity to assist my daughter if she needs help with schoolwork. Thus, for the first quarter of this school year, I decided to stay home in the mornings (on call at work), just so she has someone around to call in case she comes across glitches or needs help with the laptop. The second quarter has began, and yes, she is getting technically better and I no longer hover over her, but still there are issues beyond my control like connectivity, slow computers, application glitches, etc...all of which makes a person lose their cool. I have even resorted to hitting the poor laptop which of course, did not help.

So what can a stressed parent like me do?

photo source: http://newyorkschooltalk.org

1. Make a schedule and stick to it. The first thing we did was follow a schedule on top of that of the school. Online class work can take the whole day and more. The 4 days school schedule has the synchronous morning classes from 8 to 11:45, then the asynchronous classes from 1:30-3:30 in the afternoon for their class work and assignments. This can be overwhelming especially when there are several assigned tasks given the same time limit. We try to manage these by doing the bigger and harder assignments first. We also try to do the tasks or review for tests scheduled for the next day, before dinner time. In this way, my child can have her much wanted relaxation before bedtime. Weekends are "me time" although she has a math tutorial for one and a half hour either on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon, because like I said, Mommie is no help at all beyond basic arithmetic.

2. Develop a "growth" mindset for both you and your child. Nothing is impossible as long as we are willing to learn and work hard. I tell my child that making mistakes are part of life and we learn from them. When we fail, we take these experiences as temporary setbacks from which we can improve and become better.

3. Motivate and encourage other hobbies/interests. Having been cooped up inside the house for almost a year can create an atmosphere of boredom and loss of creativity. And so, it is best to open opportunities for interesting things to do or learn at home. There are also various classes and tutorials avail0able online like cooking, dancing and many others.

4. Allow open and unconditional communication. Let your children feel that they can speak up. Listen to their concerns without passing judgment. Reassure them that you are there to support and help them.

5. Practice Empathy. Can you imagine if this happened to us? Yes, it would have been very hard, because then there was not much technology to entertain us. However, also because of technology, our children's mental health can be adversely affected. So be kinder, be more understanding, not just to our kids but also to others around us.

Indeed, these are strange times, but as parents we only want to do the best for our kids. As the pandemic is still very much around, let us continue to pray and hope for an end to all this. Let us continue to be vigilant and practice health safety. Meanwhile, let us face the many challenges of educating our kids with positivity and aplomb. God be with us.

5 Parenting Tips In The Digital Age

2020-02-07T14:45:00.000+08:00

Technology has advanced so fast in the last 20 years, putting the world in a digital age that has changed the way many people parent their kids. It was not so long ago that life in this world was so much simpler, less complicated compared to what we have now. While it is true that there is such a thing as "the generation gap" a term first used in the 60's, when the younger generation seemed to go against everything their parents had previously believed in terms of music, values, governmental and political views as well as cultural tastes, this "gap" is more pronounced in this present generation, among the so called Millennials, or those born between the mid-1980's and early 2000.

I am part of the Baby Boomer generation and was lucky enough to have young parents who could relate to much of what was happening to the world during those years. There was not much "gap" between us, they were both my parents and my friends.

But parenting is very different now-a-days. My millennial children are Generation Y and Generation Z. If I had no generation gap with my Mom as I was growing up, there was definitely one now when it comes to our different parenting style. You see, when my parents were raising me and my brothers, technology was very basic and not accessible to most households, except maybe for radio and television, cassette and video players, cameras, and basic mobile phones. My Dad bought our first black and white television in the mid-60's and I remember spending many of my afternoons watching cartoons and old Filipino movies. But, that's about it. There were only 2 channels and shows start at noon and end at midnight. In the 60's up till the mid-90's we read books, played with neighborhood kids, interacted with people and did so many other things. Today, I can see children as young as 1 or 2 years old holding gadgets in their small hands.

So, what can parents do in this digital age?

1. Set Limits - My pre-teen is into mobile games but, she can only use her phone once she is done with homework and her chores. She usually gets an hour or two screen time during weekdays, and a little more on weekends or when there are no classes. I am glad that her school does not allow phones or gadgets in school except for school occasions and extra-curricular activities.

2. Monitor and check what your kids watch online - My daughter cannot get into her Facebook and FB Messenger account without passing through me because only I know her user name and password. For other social media like You Tube, she uses my account. In that way, I can check everything she watches.

3. Encourage other interests - Technology is just one of the many things a child can be engrossed with. I try to motivate my daughter to explore other activities that she might like to do. She likes dancing and enrolled in ballet classes, but after a year, she decided to take a break. When I asked her why, she said wants to do pointe now but, it seems that it will take more time to reach the level where she can do it. I told her that she needs to practice more and wait, but then again, she is at an age where patience is not yet a virtue. I guess when she is ready to go back...she will...until then, there are other mountains to climb.

4. Make conversations - Always give time to talk with your child. Oftentimes, I get so busy with work that I find myself so tired by the time I get home. Because of my tight schedule and as time goes, my pre-teen and I share less common interests. Realizing this, I have made it a point to make myself available whenever she says, "Mom, can we talk?". This usually happens when the house is quiet and people are in their rooms preparing for bed.

5. Be a Good Role Model - Walk your talk. It is easy to make rules but those rules should also apply to us who make them. So when I say, no cellphones during mealtime, that includes me too.

A Heritage Experience At The Rizal Park Hotel

2019-02-18T15:45:00.000+08:00

Last November, 2018, I had the privilege of another heritage experience, this time at the former Army Navy Club of Manila, now known as The Rizal Park Hotel. I spent three days of comfort, warmth and beauty in this wonderfully renovated and preserved edifice. If you are the type who likes to avoid big crowds and noisy places, this is the place for you.

I was in town to attend a convention at The Manila Hotel, which was usually where I would be staying, but unfortunately this time, we could not get rooms for the 4 consecutive days of the convention. Then, I remembered that the year before, I saw the dilapidated and abandoned Army Navy Club building across the park being renovated, and I wondered if it was now open for business. I thought it would be a lovely experience to stay there. You see as a young girl visiting my grandparents in Pasay City, I often see this place and thought how nice it must be inside, but as an exclusive enclave for members only, this place was off-limits for ordinary people like me. Well, today it is no longer that and my childhood curiosity has finally been quenched.

Clear skies under the noon day sun was my view entering the driveway. The facade looked awesome and my stay became all the more promising. Entering the front doors brings one back in time. The building was designed by William E. Parsons and has his characteristic trademark of the generous use of arches. In fact these arches continue to dominate the exterior and interior of the hotel.

But the renovation of the Army Navy Club was not without controversy. The building was declared a National Historical Landmark in 1991 by the National Historical Commission of the Philippines (NHCP) and because of this, the hotel's developer faced varied criticisms from conservationists when it's restoration started. But, all's well that ends well because the hotel had it's soft opening in July 2017.

The Rizal Park Hotel is an excellent testament to adaptive reuse. The architect and developer did everything right to restore this building to it's former glory and critics/detractors should apologize.

My room had a view of the bay and furnishings were elegant, tasteful and most importantly, comfortable. I fell in love with the hand painted floors (machuca tiles) and the courtyard, where one can experience quiet and some sense of history (see photos above). Sitting quietly here, I can imagine how club members would be sitting, talking and smoking cigars here.

As for food? The breakfast buffet was good and choices were varied (alas, it lacked...bacon, then again, is bacon Chinese?). I was always in a rush during the 3 days, that it was only on the last day before I checked out that I fully enjoyed my breakfast. The hotel has a casino, but no swimming pool yet. Accessibility is not a problem, as it is very near to shopping malls, restaurants, museums, theme parks and other historical places. Do I sound like I am loving the place? Yes, I am and will surely come back for a longer stay, one day soon.

The Rizal Park Hotel is located at South Road Drive, TM Kalaw Ext., Ermita, Manila, Philippines 1000 with telephone numbers (02)804 8700.

Disclaimer:This is not a paid post and the writer is not connected in any way to the hotel and it's management.

#MakeITsafePH - Online Safety For My Pre-Teen And For My Peace of Mind

2018-04-09T19:19:00.000+08:00

The widespread use of the internet has given rise to the emergence of internet-related crimes such as rape, theft, bullying and piracy which made the public, especially the youth, very vulnerable. I have a nine year old (soon to be ten) daughter whose online presence is growing day by day. This is something inevitable and so, for my peace of mind and for my daughter's online safety, I have established a set of rules regarding internet usage.

Set Limits

Do not be afraid to set limits. My daughter does not have her own phone yet, while our tablet has conked out for almost a year now and has not been replaced, so monitoring her online activity is still relatively easy. She does not like this, but I told her as simply as I could that the internet is not all fun and games, some people will use it to do "bad things" to others and if we are not careful, these bad things can happen to us. I created a Facebook account for her, so she can have her own Messenger account, but I manage this and she cannot open it without my help. During school days, she gets 1-2 hours of internet time, after she does her schoolwork and chores. Since it is summer now, she gets more time, but she knows that this is limited to sites approved by me. She also asks permission before she can download anything. Of course, as she grows the limits will also change, but right now she knows that I expect her to use the internet responsibly, and she would not want to lose my trust, otherwise, there are consequences that we have agreed upon.

Do Not Use Your Real Name, Keep Passwords Secret

When joining games, I help her create a pseudonym and a password upon registration. She is not allowed to give her real name and all registration is made using my email. Since she is only nine, games like Roblox also puts her on limited use. Her passwords are her secret and mine, no one else can know this.

No to Chats

I have caught her chatting with some gamers and I have talked to her about this. She reasons out that she chats with them only about their strategy, or when asking for help and vice versa, but I told her that it is not safe to chat with strangers, even if this is only online. She is such a friendly kid and does not have a lot of filters yet. This is where good communication with your child is of utmost importance. She has to learn to be more discerning and prudent when it comes to talking to people she does not know.

Do Not Post Pictures And Videos

My daughter likes to video her cousins and friends, but it is a good thing that she still does not know how to upload these on sites like YouTube. She has uploaded some pictures on Messenger to share with her classmates but she soon got bored with it. I explained to her that anything she posts on the internet will remain on the internet forever, and worst, these can be used to bully or make fun of her. She was not happy about that. Now she asks for approval before posting on Messenger.

If You Do Not Feel Right, Tell Mom

It is not just being open and communicating well with our kids that is important, but also being available to them when they need us. They must always feel safe with us and know that no matter what, we will always love them. My daughter knows that she can talk to me anytime and she must never be afraid to tell me anything, especially when she feels threatened or unsafe. She knows we love her unconditionally and without measure. I hope and pray that she will always know that I am there for her for as long as she needs me.

picture retrieved from: http://www.stlukescatholic.com

A 2018 report by Hootsuite, a US-based social media management platform revealed that the Philippines now has 67 million internet users, with all of them active on social media. Can you imagine the occurrence of online threats happening with this number? It is a real possibility. In fact, in the recent past there have been reports of internet fraud and cyberbullying, in and around the country. Because of this, Globe Telecom, being a purveyor of digital lifstyle, came out with the #makeITsafePH cybersecurity and cyberwellness campaign to educate consumers about online threats and what they can do to avoid being a victim. The campaign also teaches the public the correct online etiquette, so that they would not become a source of deplorable behavior that hurt others or is against the law. This is part of their campaign for responsible online behavior.

As parents of pre-teens we are responsible for our child's online activity, keeping them safe and responsible at the same time. I guess this is one good reason why at my age, I keep myself updated and active, on social media...you name it, I have it 😉. This works too for my peace of mind.

Does your pre-teen spend a lot of time online or on social media? What are their experiences?
I would love for you to share your views.

Think Happy Thoughts😊

Thanksgiving Thoughts: When Life Gives You More Lemons...

2017-11-06T12:56:00.003+08:00

It seems that all those 'lemons' thrown at me and my family in 2016 aren't quite done yet.

Take my younger brother, for instance...

January ended quickly and February was uneventful...at least up until the 26th.

Sunday, February 26 started quietly. It was going to be a lazy day. Not quite.

My brother whom I wrote about here in this blog, fell on his face after a seizure (absence type) and suffered a bad cut above his upper right brow. There was blood all over the floor and when we lifted him, that's when I saw how deep the cut was. But God in his infinite goodness and wisdom, has made me a doctor and someone who hoards stuff "just in case", like medical supplies, for example. I found several Steri-strips, which I used to close the wound and this stopped the bleeding, so that we did not have to go to the hospital. To make a long story short, the wound healed without any complications and life carried on.

Summer was okay, no untoward incidents happened and before I knew it, it was June and classes started. My brother's attacks were few and far in between and it seemed under control until late August when he had another one early in the evening while on his way to the bathroom. This time, my 83 year old mom deemed it fit for her (who walks with a walker) to try and catch his fall, thus resulting in injury to herself. Once again, I thank God for the guardian angels whose intercession avoided a major accident. My mom suffered a cut upper lip, while my brother was none the worse after his fall. Still, it was quite traumatic for my mom who at her age, also have a few health issues of her own.

The most recent attack and hopefully, the last was mid October. This time, it was not just a few seconds of lost consciousness, but an epileptic one which lasted for about a minute. It was after lunch on a Saturday, and while my brother was brushing his teeth, he lost consciousness and fell. Our house helpers ran to lift him up and he was conscious by then. Thinking he was okay, we walked him to the bed and just as he sat down, he started having seizures again but not just the absence (petit mal) type. He was having a grand mal seizure, the first time ever since his accident in 1976. Although his doctors have prepared us for the possibility of Post-Traumatic Seizures, it was still unexpected. When he was allowed to come home (after a year) our mom was told that my brother may experience some form of seizures, which may occur more often as he grows older. Well, while growing up, he did have some sort of upper arm spasms but no loss of consciousness. It was not until he turned 50 that repetitive head movements with loss of awareness lasting from 5-10 seconds started to happen in a more regular manner. We have increased his maintenance medicine since then, and again after this last episode.

For the last 41 years my brother has lived a life limited by his physical disabilities and speech impediments caused by his brain injury. He was 12 when he had his accident and he is now 53, uncomplaining, prayerful, always thinking of others before himself. He is such positive person in spite of everything that has happened to him, so much more than I can ever be.

And so yes, life continues to give my brother lemons* but...he continues to make lemonades.

I continue to be thankful for the life God has given my family, especially my brother. We cannot ask for more.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone

💓

*"When life gives you lemons, make lemonade" is a proverbial phrase used to encourage optimism and a positive can-do attitude in the face of adversity or misfortune. Lemons suggest sourness or difficulty in life, while lemonade is a sweet drink." (definition taken from Wikipedia)