Singularity

Heat-induced noodliness doesn't lend itself to great writing.

2010-08-18T13:19:00.000-07:00

I'm restraining myself from starting this post with a mention of just how long it's been since I last posted.

Let's just say it's been too long.

On a completely unrelated note: It's sweet torture to sit, hot and sweaty, on the deck with an equally hot laptop on my lap while listening to my kids splashing away in their kiddy pool. I'm so noodly-relaxed right now that I don't really mind the heat, but I'm still tempted to jump in the pool, clothes and all. After all, isn't it my prerogative as a grownup to do what I want and pay for the consequences later?

So yeah, about my workouts and eating: Thanks to my ever-faithful workout partner-husband, I've been consistent about hauling my ever-lazy, often grumpy morning self out to the garage to exercise. I'm finding my current program very, very challenging. Good challenging. I'm making progress and am feeling pretty strong. However, as I start tackling bodyweight exercises like pull-ups, full push-ups and plyometrics, I can really see how my extra weight is hindering my ability to progress.

Eating hasn't been consistently great. Because of the workouts and the fact that I haven't abandoned healthy eating altogether, I haven't gained any weight. Phew!

BUT, I've still got at least 30lbs of fat to lose. I can feel how strong I've gotten and how much muscle definition I have, but I can't really see it because of the fat on top. I honestly don't know how to motivate myself to stay on track, except to keep picking myself back up and starting over when I screw up.

The way I see it, every 'failure' is a lesson learned. Eventually I'll have all the bricks built into my healthy-eating foundation and will be ready to make progress.

Before I first started losing weight, I made a list of all the things that I wanted to do but couldn't/wouldn't right then because of being overweight and out of shape. I kept the list in a place where I'd see it often and it really did keep me motivated. 'Problem' is that I'm already able to do most of my original list now. I think it's time reach deeper, dream bigger and come up with a new one.

I'm thinking of taking up gung-fu this fall. There's a school in town that has a decent reputation and doesn't cost an arm and a leg. I still haven't decided for sure. 2 nights a week is a big commitment for an evening couch-slug like myself. (Yeah, don't laugh.) I took taekwondo for a short time a few years ago and really loved it. I'm a lot lighter and in a lot better shape than I was then, but I have no doubt the martial arts training will still kick my butt.

Well, if you've read this far, I thank you. Noodly-relaxedness doesn't exactly lend itself to witty writing. :)

Setting up a good home gym

2010-06-01T13:01:00.001-07:00

Keep in mind that it's a good idea to start small and build from there. You don't know exactly what your workout needs will be over time so it's better to start with a few less expensive but effective pieces and build from there instead of investing huge $$ into a what may end up becoming an overpriced, space-hogging clothes hanger.

I haven't included any cardio equipment for now because you can get an effective cardio workout by walking/running/biking or -my favorite - doing metabolic circuits. Heck even a decent exercise video is effective and far less expensive.

If you must get a treadmill or elliptical trainer for home then don't cheap out and get it from Canadian Tire. Go to a reputable fitness store, get some recommendations, try some out and then either fork over the big bucks OR stalk Kijiji or Craigslist because people are selling their overpriced clothes racks ALL the time.
OK, on to my recommendations:

FOR AN EFFECTIVE STARTER HOME GYM:

Resistance bands or tubing

These are an acceptable replacement for dumbbells, barbells or a weight machine...especially if you're just starting to work out. Tubing is preferable to bands just because it tends to come with handles and is a bit more durable. But the bands are dirt cheap, so if you just want something to get started, they’re a good choice.

A set of bands in multiple strengths costs less than $20 on ebay. A set of tubes will be around $35. (including shipping)

Stability Ball

Not an absolute necessity, but great for exercises that work your core. You can buy them pretty much anywhere.
They do come in different sizes, so if you can, sit on one to check the size. If it’s properly inflated and your upper thighs are parallel to the floor so that your knees form 90 degree angles when you sit on it, then it’s the right size.

If you can’t try one out, here are some basic guidelines for choosing a ball size based on your height:
If you are under 4′10″ choose a ball that’s 16” or 42cm
If you are 4′11″ – 5′4″ choose a ball that’s 21″ or 55cm
If you are 5′5″ – 5′11′ choose a ball that’s 25″ or 65cm
If you are 6′ and taller choose a ball that’s 29″ or 75cm
Expect to pay around $30 in a department store. A professional grade stability ball will be around $50 and is arguably worth the extra cost for the increase in durability.

Dumbbells:

Adjustable dumbells:

These offer the advantage of being able to go from 2.5 to 50 or more lbs each in a single set. The two brands I recommend are durable and allow for easy weight changes. Look for one that allows changes in 2.5 lb increments in the first 20lbs.

Bowflex Select-Tech dumbbells go from 2.5 to 52.5 lbs and will cost around $500.

Powerblock Sportblock 9.0 – goes from 2.5 to 50 lbs and costs around $500. You can buy expansion sets to add more weight if needed.

Standard Hex Dumbbells:

These are your standard dumbbells you see at the gym. You can minimize the financial pain by buying these as you need them. The disadvantage is that they will ultimately cost more than an adjustable set and will take up a lot of space.

A local fitness store here sells them for about 99 cents a pound. I did some quick math on this and to get the hex dumbbells that will give you the same workout options as a pair of adjustable dumbbells would cost around $750.

An adjustable step or box:

You can either go with commercial or home-made.

‘The Step’
It’s not cheap but you can buy additional risers to make it tall enough for box jumps and bench step-ups.
The base set which includes two sets of risers costs around $90 and every pair of risers after that costs $25. Two additional sets of risers (4 on each side total) brings it up to almost knee height for my 5’8” self. I wouldn’t want to add too many more because it gets less stable the taller it gets.

Make your own
These are just as effective and arguably more stable than ‘The Step'.

You can get the ‘how to’ for building these by clicking the picture. If you do build some, let me know how they work.

A Suspension Trainer:

We just got a TRX suspension trainer and LOVE it. I did a lot of research on this one and it’s not just a fitness gimmick.
You can set it up pretty much anywhere with the option accessories. There’s even one you can use to connect it to a closed door.

The TRX is the one most people have heard about.

Another less expensive good quality version that has gotten good reviews is the Freestyle Trainer Pro.

A Gym Quality Weight Bench:

It’s so not worth it to cheap out on this. Sure you can get one for under $100 at Canadian Tire, but the build quality will be flimsy and the weight limit is usually ludicrously low. The ones I’ve seen have an upper weight limit of 200lbs. Crazy considering even I can bench more than 50lbs so me + weights would be too much. Nice. Can’t even imagine a guy using it.

I won’t post a picture for this one. It’s too hard to find a picture that doesn’t have a female model posed in a distinctly NON-exercising posture on it. Bleh.

Again, I’d recommend going to a reputable fitness store and talking with a knowledgeable sales person. I’d look for a bench that can hold at least 1000lbs and adjusts to be flat, inclined or declined. Expect to pay at least $300 for it unless you’re buying second-hand.

A pull up bar

We made one from copper pipe using the instructions found here:

http://celtickane.com/projects/homemade-pullup-bar/

EQUIPMENT ON MY WISH LIST

Kettlebells

They’re just another way to throw some weight around. :P

Chaos makes pudding

2010-05-09T22:39:00.001-07:00

Have you ever heard the term ‘Chaos Tolerance’? I first read it in a book preview in one of last year’s Costco Connection magazines. I can’t even remember enough about the book to do a decent google search for it, but the phrase has become a part of our household vocabulary.

The idea is that different people can tolerate different levels of chaos and that we need to structure our lives accordingly.

I’ve decided that I have a very low chaos tolerance. I don’t do well with extended disruption – even good disruption makes me feel unsettled and grumpy after a short time.

So guess what the last 6 weeks have been like? We bought a home, moved, and are in the process of settling into our new one.

Routine? What routine?

Things are finally starting to settle into a semblance of normal now and I’m feeling ready to get back on track.

Yeah, workouts kind of went by the wayside. I think I got, maybe one strength training session done in the last two weeks and aimed for 2-3 in the weeks before that. My eating has been beyond bad. So bad that I’m humbled by how months of near-perfect eating and exercise can so quickly degenerate.

I feel like a pudding.

I really do miss the workouts though. A lot.

Lowell’s cleared a workable space for us in the garage. The mats are down, the equipment is set up and the new TRX is waiting to play.

Tomorrow I pick up and start fresh. Because I don’t want feel like pudding.

‘Scuse me while I go nerd for a bit

2010-03-25T17:53:00.001-07:00

Many of you know that I’m rather fond of gaming. We own some version of every current gen console, including the handhelds for a reason.

That reason is me.

I wouldn’t consider myself a hardcore gamer. Especially now that I’m a parent. That and the fact that most racing, first person shooters and action-adventure games give me serious vertigo. Yes, it is possible to get motion sickness without leaving one’s living room.

Roleplaying games are my favorite genre. Lately I’ve been really enjoying strategy rpgs like Fire Emblem, Valkyria Chronicles and Jeanne D’arc.

I’m losing patience with regular rpgs and I can’t figure out if it’s because I’ve been playing them long enough to get bored with their conventions or if this generation’s rpgs are actually that mediocre.

Case in point: I love the Final Fantasy numbered series of games. Final Fantasy VIII is still my all time favorite game (closely followed by Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time – but I digress…) Final Fantasy IX was the reason I bought my first Playstation. The series is known for its high production value, and has a dedicated fan following.

I am one of them.

Needless to say, I’ve been anticipating the release of Final Fantasy XIII for the Playstation 3 since I first heard about its release more than 4 years ago.

After playing it for a week, I think it’s the most beautiful game that I’ve ever not cared to finish. The production value is absolutely stunning. I feel like I should love it, have tried so hard to love it but just can’t. Why?

I think I’ve narrowed it down to two possible reasons:

1. I really don’t care about the characters or their world. A compelling story is the central element of any Final Fantasy game – any rpg really. If, at this point, every single character died and their world blew up and the game started with new ones mid-game I’d think it was an improvement.

2. The gameplay is beyond boring. Rpg haters have claimed for ages that rpgs require no gaming skill because all you have to do is hit x. I disagree in general, but for this game it’s absolutely true. All the grinding without the fun.

I think I’m going to take a break from it and play something different for a while. Maybe when I come back to it, I’ll feel differently – but I somehow doubt it.

Confession

2010-03-17T14:05:00.001-07:00

My eating this month has been the most horrendous it’s been since I started.

Ick.

You’d think that after months and months of reaping the benefits of healthy eating, I’d never be tempted to binge on junk again. For the first 6 months or so I really wasn’t tempted at all. The very idea of diving face first into a bag of Reese’s peanut butter chocolate mini eggs and not stopping until the bag was empty sounded disgusting. So why now? Especially when I feel like roadkill when I’ve done.

I honestly have no answer. It just goes to show that I’ll always have to be vigilant about eating well.

Fortunately I haven’t gained any weight this month. I credit that to being on track with my eating (as in eating within my goal calorie range) about 5 out of 7 days in a week. Minimum 4 on a bad week. I’ve also kept up with my workout schedule. Between the two, damage has been kept to a minimum.

Exercise has been going really well. I’m on my second month of the program outlined in Rachel Cosgrove’s book ‘Female Body Breakthrough.’ I love it and recommend it unreservedly.

My new fitness goal is to be able to do a set of 8 full pushups and 1 full body weight pull up by the end of June. I’m working on the pushups by doing them on my stairs. I started at the 5th stair and am now down the 4th. The plan is to keep at it until I can do them flat out on the floor.

Pull ups are a little trickier.

I’m starting with assisted pull ups using super heavy duty fitness bands to offset my body weight. The ones I got are from a company called Iron Woody (nice). The set I have has 3 different sizes that I can mix and match as I progress. I haven’t tried them yet. Today’s workout will be the first.

Here’s a video showing the bands in use ( the part with the bands is about halfway through):

To get myself back on track with my eating, I’m going to bribe myself. From today through next Wednesday, if I stay within my calorie range 6 out of 7 days, I’m going to buy myself some new earrings (cheapos, but still a splurge for me.)

Of Clingy Things and Vegetables

2010-02-03T23:03:00.000-08:00

So first the good stuff. I’m down 2lbs, maybe 3 this week. The yoga pants I bought at Old Navy in October – my first regular sized pants in years – are no longer suitable for working out in. They fall off.

There’s something extra impressive about stretchy pants getting functionally too big.   Because, you know, they’re stretchy, they fit forever. They have a little give when you’re a bit too big and a bit of cling when you get smaller. When they get so big they start to fall off when you jump, you know something good is happening.

The same is also true of undies…but we won’t go there.

I started yet another new workout program this week. Yeah, yeah, didn’t I just start a new one 3 weeks ago? One I loved? Yes, I loved it so much I found a newer, improved version of it and switched to that. Previously I had been using the plan from New Rules of Lifting for Women – still an excellent resource by the way. As I started looking into other work by the authors of 'New Rules' I found The Female Body Breakthrough which is written by the wife of the guy that put together the workout programs in ‘New Rules.’   ‘The Female Body Breakthrough’ is more recent. It follows a lot of the same fitness philosophy that ‘New Rules’ does plus a few important tweaks.

And the weight training workouts are totally kicking my butt. These workouts are designed to build fitness while also addressing typical muscle imbalances unique to women. The exercises might seem pretty standard fare until you follow them exactly as she describes.   I was doing standard squats with 60lb weights. Now I’m doing them with 3lbs.   The difference? I’m holding them straight up overhead and squat right until the backs of my legs hit my calves. Can't let those rinky dink dumbbells drift either.

Romanian dead lifts are all well and good but how about doing them on one leg at a time? Holding only one dumbbell to really challenge your balance?

And Bulgarian split squats are the new exercise I both love and hate. I could only do 8, bodyweight only, on each side. (3 sets)

There’s also a heavy emphasis on exercises that challenge my core muscles – a major weak spot for me. I’m looking forward to seeing the results from the new workouts.

As for eating, well, this wasn’t one of my best weeks. First off, I tried just a plain Clean Eating, no counting calories method of eating for a couple of days. 6 meals, a whole grain or fruit carb, a veggie, a palm sized lean protein and healthy fat at each meal. Don’t eat anything processed. I didn’t stick to it.

I learned that I need to count calories and write down everything I eat. To me, not knowing the calorie ‘cost’ of a given meal is like shopping in a store with no price tags. More often than not you’re in for a shock when you get to the checkout. Lesson learned. Learn, adjust and move on with the new strategy.

So the plan for next week is to continue with my current workouts, 3 days weights and 3 days HIIT cardio. I plan on tightening up my eating. I need to find creative ways to include more fruits and veggies in my daily diet. I’m still adjusting to eating healthy with braces. To be all PC about it, I don’t ‘prefer’ cooked veggies unless they’re in soup and having braces kind of nixes eating most of them raw.   I’ll figure something out.

Slow and steady wins the what now?

2010-01-27T15:36:00.000-08:00

OK, despite the positive spin I put on my slower weight loss in my last post, I have to admit that I’m still working on making peace with it.

Yet another week has gone by with nary a pound lost. According to the scale that is.
I’ve decided to stop weighing myself every day. It’s too depressing. Once a week is good enough.

It’s amazing how much sway an inanimate object can have over one’s thoughts. I know I’ve been staying on track with my eating and my workouts have been amazing. However, every morning as I stand on that silly thing, I let the numbers tell me that I’ve failed somehow.

Piece of junk.

Like I said, I know that I’m making progress. My pants are getting looser. I’m getting great muscle definition everywhere. I can push harder in my HIIT cardio workouts this week than I could last week. I’m contemplating buying a new set of weights because the way I’m going, our current set will be too light for my squats and dead-lifts in a few weeks.

I think I'll buy myself a pair of jeans that is one size too small to use as my new progress indicator. When I fit into them, I’ll know I’m getting skinnier despite what the scale tells me.

Either that, or just stop over-thinking it and focus on continuing to do what I know is right.

Progress not Combustion

2010-01-22T00:19:00.001-08:00

I’m not sure if I mentioned it here, but I gave my weight loss efforts a bit of a break through December. Yeah, yeah, don’t we all right?

I’m happy to say that despite celebrating both my and my husband’s birthdays, Christmas and New Years, I did manage to make it through the month without gaining anything. I also continued to work out a minimum of 4 days per week.

The break was a good thing. I was getting pretty burned out by the end of November. In retrospect, I’m sure it was because I was amping up my workout intensity but still keeping my daily calorie intake to a low 1200 per day. I simply wasn’t eating enough to fuel my workouts. I don’t think it was a coincidence that my weight loss had slowed considerably during November as well.

So my plan for January has been to increase my allowable calories to between 1400-1600 calories per day. I also started a new workout plan from the book ‘The New Rules of Lifting.’

My scale weight loss still hasn’t been as dramatic as I’d like. I’ve been used to seeing 2+lbs come off per week. I think I’ve only lost 4-5 lbs since the beginning of January. BUT I’m wearing my belt one notch tighter and my smallest pair of jeans is getting baggy.

Speaking of jeans, Lowell unearthed a bin labeled ‘Skinny Clothes’ on one of his shed cleaning excursions. There are some things I still have to shrink into, but I couldn’t believe how many were actually too big! How cool is that?

I still battle with my own self when I stand on the scale and see that it hasn’t changed for a few days or even a week at a time. Still worse when I see my weight loss progress on the little graph on my Sparkpeople page and see that it’s now predicting that I’ll get to my goal weight by September instead of June like I wanted. However, I’d rather get there a little later than I planned and still arrive than push (or starve) myself and burn out before I even get there.

This is not a short term fix. It’s the way I plan on living for a long, long time.

A Snapshot

2010-01-12T21:43:00.001-08:00

I head out the door wearing yoga pants, a red long-sleeved tee and a yoga-type hooded coat thing.

I’ve only ever attempted yoga 3-ish times in my life and had to give up because I nearly blacked out every time I changed elevation.

I wear the coat because I love it. It’s black and sleek. It has a funky little zipper pocket on the left sleeve. And a hood. And the zipper unzips from the bottom AND the top – you know, just in case.

I’m also feeling a little odd about wearing my yoga pants out in public but figure it’s all good because my coat is long enough to cover my bum.

I’m feeling a little more ninja-like than usual. It must be all the black sleekness.

To complete the ensemble, I throw on a pair of silver-foil Dr. Martens boots.

You’d think that the silver boots would throw off the ninja effect, but you’d be wrong. See, in my all-black outfit, I could hide in the shadows. Someone would walk by, notice something shiny and wander over to investigate ….

By then it would be too late. For them.

I wonder if ninjas do yoga?

I wonder if ninjas’ socks ever come part way off inside their shiny boots while they’re walking?

I doubt they wear their ninja gear grocery shopping. Not enough shadows.

I’ll bet they still wear their shiny boots though.

Benefits of Weight Training

2010-01-08T16:13:00.001-08:00

I’ve been itching to pass this info along since I first read it in the January 2010 issue of Oxygen women’s fitness magazine. The article is called ‘The Hidden Benefits of Strength Training.’

There were a few benefits I hadn't heard before. To summarize some of them (from the article):

1. Flatter belly

Overweight participants in one study who engaged in 2x weekly strength training lost more total body fat including more abdominal fat than the control group that did only cardio.

Up until now, we’ve been told that strength training had little effect on overall body fat composition.

2. Less risk of diabetes

Recent research has shown that strength training reduces the risk of diabetes. The mechanism is thought to have to do with how strength training reduces the fat inside the muscles and alters fat metabolism.

3. Reduction in blood pressure

A study published in 2009 confirmed that even an hour of strength training per week can reduce your blood pressure enough to cut your risk of a stroke by 25%.

4. Lower risk of breast cancer

Regular strength training can reduce your risk by 20-40%. It’s thought to be due to how strength training reduces body fat and therefore estrogen levels. Fat cells produce estrogen. Cut down the fat and the estrogen levels drop as well.

5. Less sick days

Subjects in a study done in Japan in 2008 found that strength training 3-4x per week for 8 weeks increased the number of natural Killer-T cells in their bodies.

I want more of them just because the name is cool. If I was a cell, I'd want to be the Killer kind.

6. Healthier joints

A 2009 study found that women with stronger quadriceps and hamstrings have lower incidences of knee osteoarthritis. The article doesn’t explain, but I’m guessing it has to do with how strong muscles can absorb some of the force that tends to cause wear on the joints.

Check out this article at sparkpeople.com for some other strength training benefits: http://www.sparkpeople.com/resource/fitness_articles.asp?id=636

The First 50

2010-01-06T16:50:00.001-08:00

So how did I let myself gain 90lbs?

The short story is that for most of my life I wasn’t overweight but still used food for comfort.

I gained the first 20lbs simply from being lazy about how I was eating after having my kids.

The next 70 came after I had my second daughter. I struggled with mild postpartum depression and didn’t seek help for 2 years. During that time food became my drug of choice. I’d feel crappy about everything and try to drown it in a big junk food binge and then feel even worse.

As the weight piled on, I’d feel even more crappy about myself and eat more to try and feel better. Pathetic, yes, but a fairly common scenario.

I tried and failed multiple times to make the changes necessary to lose the weight. I hired a personal trainer. I went to see a nutritionist. I read books. Tried programs. Signed up for weight loss websites. I rarely lasted more than a day.

Now here’s the rub: I know a TON about healthy eating and exercise. I even used to be a certified fitness instructor. Even at my most overweight I was still reading all I could about healthy eating and exercise. But I couldn’t manage to take the leap from information to action.

I believed I was doomed to stay fat forever.

So what has made all the difference this time? Here’s my not-so-short list:

1. I was ready. I fully believe that all my failed attempts up until that point weren’t useless. Each one taught me something and all those somethings eventually added up until I had success.

2. I had people in my life who were successfully losing weight. You know who you are. Even if I haven’t said anything to you, know that you have inspired me.

3. I had a whole different mindset going into it this time. I went into this for life. No diets. No hardcore exercise plans. I used basic common sense nutrition and exercise. The only changes I made were ones I thought I could live with for life.

4. I focused on the immediate, positive results of what I was doing. I used to eat for emotional gratification, now I focused on how good I felt after a healthy meal and how gross I felt after eating junk. I focused on how good I felt after a workout.

5. I rewarded myself for healthy eating/exercise behaviors. The way I figured it, if I did the right things, weight loss would follow. For the first month I promised myself that I’d get a cute pair of new workout pants if I worked out 6 days per week for a month without missing a workout. I bought myself a game I wanted at the end of the second month and on it went.

6. I had an amazing partner who was 100% on board with my goals. Even though my husband was in no way overweight, he recognized a need to get in shape. I couldn’t lay in bed while he went downstairs to work out and vice versa. We kept each other motivated.

7. I refused to cook seperate meals for myself just because I was counting calories. This was going to be a lifestyle change. I made it my mission to find healthy, super-yummy recipes that we’d all enjoy.

All right, that’s enough for now. Next post I share some of the specific strategies that have worked for me.

Healthy Directions

2010-01-06T15:40:00.001-08:00

Those of you who have the dubious privilege of brushing shoulders with me know that for the last 6 months or so I’ve been working to get my act together health-wise.

The journey thus far has been a lot more satisfying than I expected it to be. I started with around 90lbs to lose and have lost 52lbs so far. And yes, it feels pretty darned good.

I’ve been thinking that it’d be a good thing to share what’s worked for me so far and continue to do so as I soldier on from here.

It’ll be a combination thing. I’ll share what I’m doing with my eating and exercise as well as any struggles and lightbulb moments I have along the way. I’ll also post favorite recipes, websites and other resources I’ve found useful.

I don’t have any delusions about being any kind of expert. I do,however, hope that some of what has worked for me would work for someone else as well.

Not Humbug.

2009-12-15T18:59:00.001-08:00

Christmas. When we were kids it just somehow … happened. Sure we’d get to be a part of the baking, decorating and gift wrapping, but that’s about it.

On the 25th we’d wake up and there it would be! Wonderful presents wrapped and ready to open. Yummy special breakfast would ‘magically’ appear on the table as would the turkey dinner later in the day.

At the end of the day we’d put on our new pjs and drag our exhausted little selves to bed feeling happy yet slightly wistful that we had to wait for a whole other year until the next Christmas.

As immature as it makes me sound, I’m still reconciling the fact that grown up Christmas = work with everything I thought the day to be as a child. The magic doesn’t just happen, you have to make it.

Which is all ok, I’m good with making magic as long as the process doesn’t involve me spending all day Christmas Eve day cleaning and all day Christmas day in the kitchen.

Hello? Aren’t the holidays supposed to be about spending time with loved ones? In my experience, whenever a big gathering takes place someone has to spend the entire time not visiting in order to provide the opportunity for everyone else to.

Who came up with that idea?

I know there are some people who enjoy hosting these things. Who derive some joy from preparing a tasty feast and cozy ambience for guests to enjoy. I’ve been very blessed by those people.

I’m not one of them.

I’m not happy if by the end of Christmas day, all I’ve done is run around like a chicken with my head cut off. I feel gypped.

So here’s what Christmas looks like in our house: We celebrate with a nice, quiet day with just myself, my hubby and our two kiddos. That’s it.

It’s quiet. It’s relaxed.

We wake up to the sound of happy kiddos digging into their stockings. We wear silly Christmas hats, put birthday candles in our breakfast cinnamon rolls and sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to Jesus. We open presents. We spend time enjoying the company of our kids and each other. This year we’re going to have perogies and dill sauce with farmer’s sausage for Christmas dinner. Tasty, but easy to prepare.

Everyone gets to relax and enjoy the day. My kids have a relaxed mommy and daddy who can give them undivided attention. We have quiet time to contemplate because there’s space for it.

I Now Dub Thee Mr. StinkyHead. The Tale of my Attempt to Make Homemade Peeps

2009-04-09T20:21:00.000-07:00

Today, the Serious Eats blog posted a recipe for making Peeps from scratch.

It looked simple enough. 3 ingredients: water, sugar and plain gelatin. The instructions looked manageable. I liked the idea of Peeps with fewer preservatives. It had been a while since my last attempt to awaken my inner Martha Stewart.

So I tried.

Here they are:

These are the good ones. The ones that were good enough to get eyes.

A closeup of one of the better ones. He looks like a snuffalupagous seal hybrid.

One of the many, many rejects. A Peep poo. The Peep poos didn’t get eyes. I thought they’d be too traumatized by the sight of their poo-shaped buddies.

I, apparently, am not a domestic goddess. I make Peep poos for Easter. I also feed them to my children.

Art Upgrades

2009-02-10T09:24:00.001-08:00

Sorry to inflict yet another one of these on you in such a short time. Some people keep baby/kid scrapbooks. I blog.

Tasia just brought one of her drawings over to me saying, “Here Mom, look at this: I upgraded my drawing.”

Proof positive that we are a geek family to the core. Other kids add to their drawings. Mine upgrade.

Moral Issues … Or Not

2009-01-21T09:50:00.001-08:00

My house has clutter. My gardens have weeds. My driveway has snow. And more often than not, I leave them that way.

Am I lazy? Maybe.

Here’s what I want to know: Does a clean house really = good person and messy house = bad person?

It’s a gut reaction. You walk into someone’s house and see dirty dishes in the sink, laundry on the couch and toys on the living room floor and your estimation of that person’s character drops a notch or two. If the house is in a similar state the next few times you come over it drops a few more. Why?

I am getting more connected with the fact that my messy home has a negative effect on my well being. I’m getting better at keeping things orderly because I’m learning that it works for me. I’m not doing it because I’m afraid of what people think or because it’s some indicator of domestic ascendance.

So how about it? You don’t judge my character by my house and yard and I won’t judge your intelligence by your spelling.

Family Culture – Parenting from our Strengths

2009-01-18T23:18:00.001-08:00

It didn’t take me long after having my first baby to notice that parenting can be rather, well, competitive. It starts early. I, for one, was quite proud that my babies were off the charts height-wise and had full heads of hair. By my second baby, I realized how ridiculous it was to take their height and hair so personally…After all, what did I consciously contribute to these ‘achievements?’

As my girls have grown to their current ripe old ages of 6 and 4, I find more and more to be proud of. I’ve also noticed that the parenting Olympics haven’t lessened in intensity. Everything is up for adjudication: how they behave, how early they walk and talk, what they eat, when they go to bed, how they dress … and on it goes.

The other day I overheard a couple of moms talking about how they plan their meals. One mentioned that she occasionally serves breakfast food (pancakes, bacon etc.) for supper. The other agreed, saying that they like to have breakfast for supper sometimes too….but oh, don’t worry, we never just give them cereal.

Good grief! Why did she even feel the need to qualify this? I’ll put it right out there: My kids eat cereal for supper at least once a week. I don’t think they’re suffering.

For whatever reason, moms these days are feeling more isolated than ever. Among the moms that I know of, I’d venture to suggest that at least 30 percent have struggled with depression. Scratch that. 30 percent have had treatment for depression. I’d say far more than that struggle with it. Feeling like you’re being judged certainly doesn’t help.

Parenting is the most difficult and emotionally expensive job I’ve had. I make mistakes every day and I feel terrible about them. I undervalue the good things I do. I worry that I’m doing too much, that I’m not doing enough, that my kids will be sitting in front of a shrink as adults talking about how their mom screwed them up. I know I’m not alone.

We need to cut each other (and ourselves!) some slack. We each have our own strengths and concurrent weaknesses. Our spouses have their own strengths and weaknesses. Together with our kids, we create a family culture that is unique from any other.

Here’s an example: I love reading. I’ve always loved reading. I’ve read aloud to my kids from the time they were a few months old. Books have been among their earliest playthings. As a result (partly) both my girls love books. They have both taught themselves to read at a very early age. Really, I can take no more credit for that than I could for their height or hair when they were babies. I parent from my God-given passions and strengths.

Another family loves being active. The parents share their love of being active with their kids from the time they’re babies. They go sledding in the winter, hiking in the summer and are often outside playing with them. As a result, their kids have developed a love for being active and may or may not be coordinated from an early age. These parents know reading with their kids is important, but it takes effort to even think of fitting this into their day.

We’re the opposite. I know it’s important for my kids to be active. I know developing gross motor coordination is important. However, it doesn’t come naturally to me to think to fit it into our day. I offset my weakness by putting the kids in gymnastics, dance and swimming and continue to work on getting outside with them more.

Should I be beating myself up for my ‘weakness?’ Nah. This is my story. God gave my kids to me knowing who He made me to be.

Same with yours.

Overheard

2008-12-11T10:43:00.000-08:00

My 4 year old talking about the bar of soap in the bathroom:
"Mom I poked holes in the soap with a screw so it'd look more like coral."

It's this kind of creative expression and scientific exploration that gets her into most of her scrapes these days. Fortunately this time it was only soap that ended up full of holes.

Pie

2008-10-07T18:52:00.001-07:00

An all too rare event occurred today. Much to my family's joy I made an apple pie. As we ate dinner the following conversation took place:

Tasia - "Mommy, you're the queen of all pies. You have the kingdom of all pie fillings of all the land."

"Daddy, you're the king of pies."

"I'm the helper. And Katiana is the little, little princess."

Katiana - "I'm a bug."

Despite having 2 girls and no boys we've never been a really girly-pink, doll-filled household. We've made efforts. I have bought the girls dolls etc. but they always thought that stuffed animals were more fun. Tasia actually had a hate-on for baby dolls for most of her toddler/preschool years. We'd show her one and she'd back away with fear and disgust written all over her little being.

Nowadays Tasia's showing a marked interest in all things girly...dresses, dancing, pretty hair etc. but note the conversation above: She'd rather be a helper than a princess.

And Katiana would rather be a bug.

Flickr Meme

2008-08-17T22:22:00.000-07:00

Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr search, choose your favorite image, copy and paste each of the URL’s into the mosaic maker (3 columns, 4 rows).

The questions:

1. What is your first name? (Staci)
2. What is your favorite food? (Chocolate)
3. What high school did you attend? (KSS)
4. What is your favorite color? (Black, Violet and Crimson)
5. Who is your celebrity crush? (Lowell)
6. Favorite drink? (Lattes)
7. Dream vacation? (Deserted Tropical Island)
8. Favorite dessert? (Cherry Cheesecake)
9. What do you want to be when you grow up? (Wiser)
10.What do you love most in life? (Love - all its faces)
11. One word to describe you. (Complex)
12. Your Flickr name. (hunnysunshine)

Here are the links to the actual pictures:
1. Staci, 2. Hot Chocolate, 3. Untitled, 4. MEMORABLE SUNSET, 5. 2008 06 21_0154_edited-2, 6. latte pour detail, 7. Private Island, 8. Cherry Cheesecake, 9. Soul-wise, 10. Circle of Love, 11. simply complex, 12. Inside A Honey Jar

Everyday Inspiration Day 4

2008-03-12T12:49:00.001-07:00

Wee sockies are the bane of my existence. Today we actually found a matching pair! Beautiful.

Everyday Inspiration Day 3

2008-03-12T12:44:00.000-07:00

Is there anything quite so nice as a squooshy, squeaky clean, bright-faced little one fresh from the bath?

Everyday Inspiration Day 2

2008-03-11T10:26:00.001-07:00

I had a hard time coming up with a title for these posts. 'Personal Challenge Day 2' seemed so generic. 'Find Something Beautiful Every Day and Take a Picture of it Day 2' was a tad wordy. (You think?)

'Everyday Inspiration Day 2' sounds a bit more Hallmark than I'd like, but it's the best I can come up with so we're stuck with it.

Here's yesterday's picture:

This is Tasia's artistic celebration of the coming spring.

Look at what I've been doing today!

2008-03-09T19:49:00.000-07:00

I've spent my afternoon organizing our books, dvds and videogames using a free program I found called Libra.

Get this: It uses my webcam to scan in the barcodes! As far as I could tell from the faq, any ordinary webcam can be used as long as it has the ability to focus clearly on the barcode from close up. It really works!

I've got almost all the kids' books, dvds and videogames archived and all our videogames, dvds and about half our books done.

Sweetness.

I had to laugh though. Once the webcam accidentally scanned my elbow and came up with "Body Language, Secrets of Courtship and Dating."

New Personal Challenge

2008-03-08T12:14:00.000-08:00

This week I stumbled upon a neat website called upumpitup.com. Yeah I know. Lame name. The idea is that by setting and meeting small goals you make each day better.

I just joined up this week and have decided to take on a challenge to take a picture of something beautiful or inspiring in my life every day for a month. Today is my first day and here's my picture:

Lowell and Tasia went out to pick up our special Saturday family breakfast (yummy Donut King donuts) and came home with these beautiful little daffodils as well.

I love our family weekends.