Views From My Hammock

Wonderful, Blessed and Grateful... Priceless

2015-02-03T06:19:00.002-05:00

For those tuning in late on Monday or those rising early on Tuesday… The promised “story to follow”…

Returning to the beach from “work” Monday morning at 6am, as is our daily routine… A walk, breakfast for the boys and I followed by another walk and a short nap… Monday’s nap proved shorter than most…

An early February snow storm back east providing snow days for school kids and their teachers… Also provided time for a text and phone call to roust me from my slumber sooner than planned… My best friend for the last 45yrs…

So what do you talk about with someone snow bound in NY… Yeah, the weather… Current life events… Our health… The upcoming adventure to Las Vegas… And baseball…

We are both always blessed to hear from each other… Conversations always started with… “Hey, I was just thinking about you.” Conversations always ended with “I love you.”

Our friendship is a Master Card commercial… Priceless…

The boys now wide awake weren’t about to let me just roll over… So dress… Walk and start a pot of coffee… Back from the walk and coffee ready… Just on time to share some time with two new friends… One of the best things about this adventure the boys and I are on is the people we have met…

As we prepare to move on to the next leg of adventure… There are people we have met at each stop who have welcomed us as one of their own and whether we see each other ever again they’ll be remembered for their kindness and friendship… Their love for the boys and the boys love for them… A blessing from the road… Chicken soup for the road weary warriors…

Feeling content and grateful… There was one final blessing of the day… A visit from an old Navy buddy I hadn’t seen since leaving our boat in San Diego for shore duty in 1982… We’re grayer and wiser… But for a short time as we talked, we were 20something sailors again… 33years is a lot to catch up on… But the laughs, the smiles, the firm handshakes and the hugs were genuine… Brotherhoods bonded at greater than 400ft don’t break easily…

Confirming again in my mind… This adventure the boys and I have undertaken is a good path… The right path… And all the mistakes and wrong turns taken before are no longer regretted… They were there to put us here… On this path…

As we prepare to head out on the next leg of this adventure, the boys and I look forward to both the new and old friends we will meet along the way… We are blessed by them and grateful for them…

Serious... Serious as a Heart Attack!!!

2015-01-25T08:53:00.001-05:00

Ok I promised a late night blog… It’s 430am and time to make good on the promise… It’s time to make a lot of things happen… But more on that later…

Life on the beach has been pretty tranquil and uneventful since my discussions with Harbor Patrol… http://viewsfrommyhammock.blogspot.com/2014/12/a-follow-up-to-christmas-eve-visit-from.html

Several email exchanges and a visit with the Harbor Master smoothed my ruffled feathers and seem to have put an end to the Harbor Patrol leading with their badge out in front of a bigoted, prejudiced and judgmental attitude towards “just another dirt bag living in an RV”…

While publicly stating to me his support for the Harbor Patrolman in question, I would have to believe that some “correction” was done in private… Fine, it’s good leadership… Now we are greeted with waves and “How are you?” Funny how that seems to work, isn’t it???

While the attendance at the Ventura Harbor Comedy Club was less than what I had hoped… The show went well and I will give another shout out to the comics… Angie Krum, David Nieker, Delanie Fischer and Matt Lewis… Unfortunately, the Golden Globe Award Show was the same night and while coming from a place where people willingly venture out via snowmobile braving the worst of weather… I have learned that all people in Southern California need for an excuse to stay home and watch TV is a little bit of rain… Insert your own judgments here…

I continue to be greeted by people on the beach and in town who recognize me after reading the VC Star feature article… http://www.vcstar.com/entertainment/arts-and-culture/nuclear-guy-hosts-ventura-comedy-show_38882961

It’s kind of cool, too bad they didn’t come to the show…

Special thanks to fellow comic, booker and friend Phil Peredo, for hooking me up with a “Front of the Line Pass” to audition for “America’s Got Talent” February 12^th in Las Vegas… Who knows what may come of it… I do know I would not have even considered waiting in line for a 90 second audition, before attending workshops with Steve North http://www.funnycoach.com/

Is a TV credit or more in the stars??? I’m just grateful for the opportunity…

While hoping to attend a reunion of shipmates of the USS FLYING FISH (SSN-673) this coming August… It hinges on being able to book enough PAYING comedy work during the trip east from California to Virginia Beach… While numerous emails have been sent… I’m still waiting for some replies… Bookers??? Hello out there…

My dogs and I are looking forward to a “Summer of Adventure” on the comedy road… We just need a “Little Help from Our Friends”…

So… Lastly… The title of this blog… Hopefully this will also encourage others and inspire some help from our friends… Take your dreams serious… Take them as “Serious as a Heart Attack!!!”

While I have lost about 15lbs since arriving in Ventura… A change of diet… IE drinking much less… And doing much more walking everyday… And generally feeling very well… Getting rid of the stress carrying job and ex-wife will do that… I had a bit of an eye opener recently…

January 5^th during my annual physical at the VA Clinic… The doctor walked in with the strip chart of my EKG asking… “Did you know you’ve had a heart attack???” Sometime within the last year… Since it didn’t show up on last year’s EKG…

It must have mild enough to write off as indigestion or just not feeling well at the time… So with a renewed commitment to making my dream come true… I’m asking again for a “Little Help from My Friends”... Bookers???

I don’t want to waste another damn day not chasing what I really want… I wasted ten damn years before going back out on the road a year and a half ago… But I am where I am and not complaining about that… I’m only looking forward to what gets me closer to my dream and the adventures that are coming next…

So bookers… Help send me and the boys on another adventure… And don’t worry… If I die alone in my RV, camping some night on the road… At least the boys will have someone to eat…

VC Star

2015-01-07T18:17:00.001-05:00

It’ll be in print in The Star’s Time Out section Friday

http://www.vcstar.com/entertainment/arts-and-culture/nuclear-guy-hosts-ventura-comedy-show_38882961

A Follow Up To Christmas Eve Visit From Harbor Patrol

2014-12-26T10:41:00.000-05:00

P Hummer (Harbor Patrol Supervisor)

This past August 2014 while still living in Idaho Falls, ID… I began packing limited possessions as space allowed into my 28ft RV for my trip to Ventura, CA. Planning to travel there with my 3 dogs to take part in the Ventura Comedy Festival this past September…

Arriving in late August and falling in love with life on the beach… The Comedy Festival long since over… My dogs and I are still here… I’ve taken a part time security job at a Ventura Harbor marina… We’ve made many new friends and been embraced by a beach community of troubadours, musicians and misfits… Many different people with different backgrounds and different stories all leading to a place of common ground… The beach…

It’s an idyllic life… ALMOST…

What leads people to resent it??? To lash out against it??? I fall short of the words as I also fall short of explaining their possible reasons why… Why some… Unhappy with their own miserable existence would make false charges against people they don’t even know… Troupadours, musician and misfits happily living their lives… This could be discussed without answers for hours…

Experiencing this personally Christmas Eve morning… I was “visited” by the Ventura Harbor Patrol at approximately 930am, while legally parked on Spinnaker Road at the Channel Islands National Park, in response to a “call” they allegedly received that my dogs were running unattended, unsupervised and defecating… While I allegedly ignored cleaning up after them…

While I have no way of confirming the alleged call was actually received… I can confirm that I was confronted by a Harbor Patrolman who had already decided the charges were correct… Guns blazing and in my face… Threatening to kick me out of the park… I quote… “We’ve kicked people out of here before… We can do it again”… Though I was legally parked and no dog droppings were found in the area of question… I was “just another dirt bag living in an RV at the beach”…

Let me now take the time to set some things straight… Since your Harbor Patrolman neglected to take the time to find anything out about me… His mind already made up that I was a “just another dirt bag living in an RV at the beach”…

I am a 9yr US Navy submarine veteran… I’ve walked on the Polar Ice Cap (It’s not melting, btw), crossed the International dateline, swam at the equator in the Indian Ocean and seen the Rock of Gibraltar while standing topside on a submarine transiting into the Mediterranean Sea… I’ve transited the Panama Canal and travelled all across the world…

After serving I enjoyed a more than 20yr career as an operator at a nuclear reactor plant in Upstate NY… They don’t give those jobs to “dirt bags”… Following my career there… I enjoyed another 7 plus years on the road as a contractor at nuclear power plants all across this country… Including the Idaho National Laboratory… They don’t give those jobs to “dirt bags” either…

During my working career I also served as a volunteer fireman… Serving one year as Company President and another as Assistant Chief… “Dirt Bags” don’t do those jobs either…

During my 7 year stretch as a contractor I also began pursuing my dream of performing standup comedy and thus eventually arriving here for the Ventura Comedy Festival as previously stated this past August…

I am now 58 years old… Having earned my right to take an early retirement… I am pursuing a dream… Part of which is living and travelling in my RV with my 3 dogs… Being unfairly judged about a choice I earned the right to make was/is NOT part of that dream…

While I now regret not committing his name to memory… What has the Harbor Patrolman in question done in his life that gives him the right to unknowingly judge mine??? While I understand that he’s required to follow up on every call… I would expect it to be done professionally… Not with his badge out in front of his bigoted, prejudiced and judgmental attitude towards “just another dirt bag living in an RV”…

While I also completely understand his very possible lack of job satisfaction chasing down dog turd complaints… Maybe he should have chosen a different career… His lack of satisfaction gives him no right to drive around bothering people…

I understand and hopefully I am correct that this individual represents only himself and not your entire department… But while wearing the uniform and performing his duties… He does represent your whole department…

For your added information a copy of this email has also been sent to the Ventura County Star and Ventura County Reporter…

Thank you for your prompt attention to this matter… I would hope no one is ever to be treated like this by anyone in your department again…

Sincerely,

Steve Natarelli

xxx-xxx-xxx

A Year of Thanks...

2014-11-26T21:01:00.000-05:00

Last Thursday marked the one year anniversary of my last day at INL… A goodbye show at the Idaho Falls Elks Lodge the following night and I was on my way east… Two months on the road before returning to Idaho… Happy the boys were safe and loved in Port Orchard, WA…

I spent a week in Colorado, 2 in Illinois including a weekend with my twin sister I had seen once in the previous 3yrs… It’s once in the last 4 now and that needs to be changed… Finishing with 2wks with my cousins and best friend in NY before heading west again… Driving headlong into the “2014 Polar Vortex” in Illinois, Wisconsin and Minnesota before making “turns for home” and heading back to Idaho… Not that Idaho will ever be “home”… It proved again to be the comedy Siberia it always will be… Not enough venues/opportunity and too damn far from most of the rest…

I spent time with many friends in both directions along the way… Made many new ones and I am thankful for the laughs and hospitality shared with them all…

With my lease about to expire, the end of August, in Idaho… I sold my car, loaded the boys and myself into the RV and headed to Ventura, CA for the Ventura Comedy Festival… Spending a week in Northern Utah on the way…

Arriving in Ventura to take part in the festival… I found a part time security job 2am to 6am at a marina… It’s kind of nice being able to take the boys to work with me every night… Someone commented they don’t look like police dogs… I said… “They’re undercover”…

I am doing workshops once a week and shows once a month at the LA Connection Comedy Theatre in Sherman Oaks… Including last week’s “Industry Night” in front of bookers and agents for Commercials, TV roles and comedy… Reworking a big part of my act to fit a newly defined comedic character… I’m excited about where this can lead…

But maybe in a karmanic (is that a word) way… The marina job has reminded me…I don’t have to settle for where ever the winds of fate drive me… I can adjust the sails and steer for wherever I desire…

Which may be bringing this blog to the deep and thoughtful intent I spoke of before sitting down to actually write this…

As we all sit Thursday to say thanks… There are many things to be thankful for… If you are lucky enough to be surrounded by loved ones and family… Revel in that… I understand the choices I have made and the sacrifices that come with those choices… My closest “blood” is thousands of miles away… Possibly changing that is one of next year’s top priorities… With how, when and where yet to be determined… Las Vegas is a possibility…

Again recognizing and acknowledging the sacrifices that come with my decision to chase this dream…To load myself and my three dogs into my RV and go… I left the second 6 figure a year job of my “civilian” career…

We live with the choices we make and I can honestly say I have never been more at peace… High stress came with those jobs… Death sentence stress… That stress is gone… I feel happier and healthier than I have in years… I’m thankful for that…

Where this adventure comes ashore is yet to be determined… But there’s only one set of hands on the sails now… We won’t be sailing in circles anymore… I am spending the holiday alone with my boys… Happy in the knowledge that it’s better than spending it with the wrong person…

I’m happy to report Riley broke into a huge grin and surprised me with a sprint across the beach at 630 this morning… Almost like he had been saving it up for me… He’s 12… But he’s still a puppy at heart… I am very thankful for that…

I’m not sure I said everything I started out intending to say…But I am going to keep this positive and end it here… Happy Thanksgiving everyone… For Thanksgivings past, present and future… Be thankful everyday…

THE RIGHT PLACE AT THE RIGHT TIME...

2014-10-26T08:56:00.003-04:00

So… A little background for those who don’t know… I realize most of you, my faithful readers, already know I finally escaped Idaho for good approximately two months ago…

After spending a week in with a friend in Utah… I headed to Ventura, CA for the Ventura Comedy Competition and Festival… While here I have taken a security job at a local Marina… I’m back to working nights… But even though it’s from 2am to 6am everyday… Only 4hrs/day isn’t hard to take… The job itself is far from being mentally or physically challenging… Despite the long stretches on my feet sometimes...

I hadn’t originally planned on still being here… But living and travelling in a 28ft RV with my three dogs has put a bit of a squeeze onto my travel budget…

Unfortunately, using the insurance money from the awning damaged in the Utah wind storm to correct some RV generator problems, hasn’t completely solved the generator problems and might have been better used as part of the travel to Las Vegas budget… So the originally planned follow up move to Las Vegas is currently on hold… And that’s OK…

There’s 2 good open mics in town… Monday and Tuesday nights… And I have an open invitation to another on Sunday nights in Santa Monica…

And it has given me time to think… Not always clearly, but learning to be quiet on the inside allows us to hear the answers the universe has for a lot of our questions…

Is the move to Las Vegas even the right one??? Would a move east be better??? There’s a lot of comedy work in the southeast… It would make it a lot easier to keep my calendar full… Would I be a better comic??? Of course… Regular work would facilitate that…

After finally taking my first step on stage in 2002, that I should have taken in my in my early 20’s or sooner… I wasted most of another 10yrs (the last 4 in the comedy Siberia of Southeast Idaho) in another shitty marriage to another drama addicted, shitty person who thought it was always all about her…

Complaining I was never home while trying to build a career as a road comic… I can only answer… I was gone all the time for the same reason I drank a half gallon of gin a week when I was home…

Hello… How are you at math??? Can you tell me the common denominator in the equation???

Maybe there’d have been less drama and she would have felt better about herself if she quit chewing so much food… Instead of trying to convince me her fat ass was just a Fig Newton of my imagination… OK, I’m done…

I haven’t said much about that and I won’t now… My new comedic character will though and he will endear himself to the audience at the same time… Yep… I can’t wait ‘til she sees me on HBO… The peace I feel having it over and done with is worth any price of hardship I am experiencing now…

Cesar Milan has nothing on me… I could easily be called The Bitch Whisperer… If she doesn’t like that, she should take my advice and unfollow my blog… I haven’t been able to figure out how to block that though I have managed to block the bitch from stalking me on Facebook, Linkedin, Twitter, Google+ and several other sites…

Enough about that… Let’s talk about what the possibilities my re-found freedom is giving me…

Well, the previously stated travel budget concerns make relocation to Vegas or the Southeast US, at least currently, a point not open for discussion… I’m in southern California and maybe, just maybe the Universe is telling me… I’m in the right place at the right time… Is it time for a real shot at stardom??? Am I too old for it??? Possibly… Especially if I go around thinking I am… So I won’t…

I have begun working with Steve North http://www.funnycoach.com/ and I really feel it is going to make a world of difference in my career… Not as a comic… But as a comedian… Check out his website to understand the difference…

Working at night means long days at the beach with the boys… They love the water and it has really helped Riley rehab his arthritic knee and hip… I have a lot of time to exercise, swim, tan, write, work out new material and develop my new comedic character…

It’s also given me a chance to meet many locals who also hang out at the beach… It seems a lot of them… Especially the women, must have been hockey players* (for those for those who don’t get that… Stay tuned for the explanation at the end)…

I need 10 – 15 minutes of material ready for this Monday… 5 minutes or more on this Tuesday... Which may or may not be part of Monday’s 10-15… And 5 minutes for the first workshop with Steve North on Wednesday… I’ll be doing my first show with Steve on Thursday November 6th and performing at an “Industry Night” two weeks later on November 20^th… A lot of exciting things close on the horizon…

Is the Universe telling me, I’m in the right place at the right time??? I’m choosing to think so…

I have long since determined to believe I don’t need to kiss anyone’s ass to get their permission to be funny… Just so you know… Yes, Mike “Drama”… I mean you…

Those who have helped and encouraged me will get their thanks just as they have in the past, in the present and in the future… Those who want me to kiss their ass… Will be invited to kiss mine… Yes, purging some negativity there…

I have a lot of work to do… But really feeling energized with possibilities…

Stay tuned for more updates… Now I need to write more jokes about the meth heads* I am meeting at the beach…

Underway on Nuclear Power

2014-08-21T23:17:00.001-04:00

My newest project... A video blog of our next adventure... Struggling with finding a name for it… I finally decided aptly on "Underway on Nuclear Power"…

As I leave behind the mistake of moving to Idaho Falls, ID by loading my three National Labs… Riley, JJ and Simon into my RV to pursue my comedy dreams... It can be followed at www.youtube.com/stevethenuclearguy

Leaving Idaho Falls a week ago today, we’ve been visiting friends in northern Utah for a week…

Three dogs and myself in a 28ft RV… It’s a good thing I was a submariner… It’s cramped and sometimes it doesn’t smell good in here… Yes… I’m hot racking with my dogs… If anyone wants to donate a klaxon we’d put it to good use and give you a shout out here on the blog…

If I showed you the outside of the RV… You would probably say we need a collision alarm more than a klaxon…

We’ll be leaving for Ventura, CA sometime tonight… Opting to drive during the cooler temps of the desert nights… At least there won’t be fog in the bilges and we will also avoid the Salt Lake City traffic… Google maps says it’s a 12.5hr drive… Not expecting to set any speed records in a 1994 RV, partly held together by duct tape… I know it’s going to take longer…

Scheduled for a preliminary round of the Ventura Comedy Festival Competition at 7pm on Sunday August 31^st… I’d love to see you in the audience if you’re in town… Hit me up to get on my guest list…

September promises to be interesting as I have submitted to numerous casting calls for movie extras and Reality TV… While spending my nights garnering as much stage time as possible… The end of the month will hopefully find me in the Ventura Comedy Contest Semi-Finals and I’m already booked for a spot as part of the Ventura Comedy Festival in the Road Warrior show Friday September 26^th at 10pm…

Seems fitting… But with three dogs and myself in a 28ft RV… We can’t fit much more in here… Road Warriors??? Yes… I’d say we are…

October will find us back on the road to various destinations, much more adventure and maybe a semi-permanent residence… Stay tuned here for updates… I’ll try to post a video at least once each week… We’d like to consider everyone out there as part of the “crew”…

Don't Let The Curtain Go Down On Me

2014-08-18T18:18:00.002-04:00

http://youtu.be/Gzn2_8i26ys

Following up last week’s blog…

http://viewsfrommyhammock.blogspot.com/2014/08/thanks-mom.html

With one more and several links to others… One written almost one year ago while camping in the Idaho desert alone with my boys…

http://viewsfrommyhammock.blogspot.com/2013/09/desert-nights.html

Sadly mentioning the death of a friend at 52yrs old in that blog… My life was also touched by the death of a good friend’s sister at 48yrs old while I was writing that blog and another close friend at 58yrs old, a brother fire fighter from my days as a volunteer in Pultneyville, NY, less than a week later…

Life has been crazy, busy and full of change since writing that blog last year… So I hadn’t given much thought to the significance of those events until this past week…

Then I read this… http://www.standupcomedyclinic.com/4779/how-robin-williams-saved-my-life/?mc_cid=2017c9b62a&mc_eid=4c41690a64 by my friend Jerry Corley... I will quote it here...

At first I refused to believe it. Like a lot of comedians, I had worked with Robin several times. I even drove him in a limousine every day for a couple of weeks early in my career, when I was cutting down my road work to try to save my marriage.

I remember Robin said to me, “Save your marriage? F*@k your marriage. Save your life!”

Most of those who know me… Know I had moved to Idaho to take a job at the Idaho National Laboratory to try to save my marriage… 12hr rotating shift work and an hour bus ride to and from the Idaho desert… 14hrs day or night to sit and watch my life slowly and unhappily ebb away… Yeah, I was the bad guy… I’m sure she told those of you who know her…

Determined not to go out like that… My divorce from my executioner was already final when I wrote last year’s blog and I was just a few months away from walking away from the death sentence of that job…

As irony would have it… She was the one who called to tell me of the death of our friend Dan, my fellow fire fighter… Sad with the news… I asked her… “Do you finally understand now??? Do you finally understand I would have been willing to die to escape the death sentence of that job… That life… Why did it take three deaths for you to finally get it???”

Never one to accept anything but her own sainthood… She didn’t like the question because she didn’t like the answer…

Yes… This past year has been full of changes… Some hard… Some uncomfortable… There are lots of unknowns… But I’m headed to where I’m supposed to be… I understand the mistakes of the past much better now…

http://viewsfrommyhammock.blogspot.com/2014/08/how-did-i-get-here.html

I have no intention of letting the curtain go down on me…

http://youtu.be/FI5xme5k5AQ

Holy Mangi Ming-ya

2014-08-16T12:55:00.000-04:00

Not a character this time, but an event featuring some characters already introduced (Stefano Ming-ya, our stories hero and Nana Ming-ya, his beloved Italian Grandmother) and of course, some new characters and anti-heros to make the story interesting.

Ascending the steps leading from her extra kitchen, in the catacombs of her basement, Nana Ming-ya is excited today. Her grandson, Stefano Ming-ya is planning a visit with some of his friends from the Catholic High School, they all attend.

Preparing her standard massive amounts of food in anticipation of their arrival, she did not have long to wait. Soon the car full of Catholic High School teenagers pulled in to the driveway of Nana and Papa Ming-ya's hilltop home. Music blaring and smoke billowing from the windows, the teenagers emerged from the car red eyed, laughing hysterically and hungry. Happy that they seemed to be having so much fun, Nana Ming-ya never thought of asking about the sweet smoke aroma that they were all covered with.

As they sat down to eat, Nana implored them with the standard exortation to eat, Mangi, mangi !!!!

Not needing any further encouragement, the teenagers dug right in, shoveling huge amounts of homemade pasta and meatballs, Italian bread and butter, sausage and peppers and many other delights into their mouths, attempting to quell the severe case of the 'munchies' that had beset them.

Nana Ming-ya just sat back, marveled at their exuberance and continued to encourage them with, Mangi, mangi!!!!

As bowl after bowl of homemade Italian delights was greedily devoured, Nana Ming-ya began to worry.

Do not these youngsters eat? She wondered to herself as she served up another bowl of pasta. Her exhortations were beginning to dwindle when she finally screamed, Holy Mangi Ming-ya!!!!! I thinka you boys eata too much!!!!

Snapped from the trance like state in which they had been eating, at the sound of Nana Ming-ya's screams, the Catholic High School boys realized that yes, their bellies were full. So after many thank you’s and compliments to Nana Ming-ya's cooking, the teenage boys left in search of further adventure, Catholic High School Girls...to be continued.

Thanks Mom...

2014-08-15T17:58:00.001-04:00

It’s been a few days now and many things have been written and said about the tragic passing of Robin Williams… I have provided links to several articles and quotes from each… I found them all to be very interesting, introspective and sadly relatable…

I urge everyone to read them and not to skip ahead to something I wrote many years ago about an incident in my own life… An incident almost forgotten, but remembered with pride upon reading these articles…

http://www.slate.com/articles/arts/culturebox/features/2014/the_humor_code/are_comedians_really_depressed_or_is_sadness_just_funny.html#comments

Sure enough, according to their book Pretend the World Is Funny and Forever, the analyses revealed that most of the comedians grew up in chaotic households with critical, indifferent mothers, leading them to become obsessed with notions of good and evil, angels and demons. As the Fishers note in their book, “We would propose that a major motive of comedians in conjuring up funniness is to prove that they’re not bad or repugnant. They are obsessed with defending their basic goodness.”

“I'm not saying anything science doesn't already know, by the way. Find a comedian, and you'll usually find somebody who had a shitty childhood.”

Read more: http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/robin-williams-why-funny-people-kill-themselves/#ixzz3AUrCKBDg

https://www.facebook.com/notes/jonas-barnes/why-the-death-of-robin-williams-is-devastating-and-should-set-off-alarms/10152398985417880

“Comedy is a strange beast in that sense. Our job is joy. We make people laugh. For a brief time, we allow the audience to escape from their lives through laughter. We are jesters to the kingdom of life. Yet, so many times, that joy that we provide is masked in tragedy and comes with a price. The stereotype is that comics are fucked up in the head. We're crazy. We're nuts. We're full of tragedy. Our lives must have been fucked up. And I'll be damned if that stereotype doesn't ring true a lot of the time. We're the sad clowns of the world. All of the greats that you have seen come and go were fucked up. Drug addictions, alcoholism, destructive behavior...why? Because we are destructive. We thrive on adrenaline rushes and chaos. And we do it because we have something inside us that needs it. Was it a shitty upbringing? Did we get our asses kicked as kids? Did we get bullied? Have we been fucked by the world around us? Whatever the tragedy is, we find it and make all of you laugh at it. We bottle it down and turn it into humor. It is a coping mechanism that affectively bottles the emotions away at the same time. It is a vicious cycle that, often times, ends in an ultimate tragedy.”

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10152560531007649&set=a.10151611049592649.1073741824.742412648&type=1

“Comics are fucked up people. That's just a fact. We ball up our "mess," write jokes about it, and we get on stage with it seeking love, acceptance, and connection from total strangers. There is nothing normal or sane about who we are or what we do. We comics, just like everyone else, deal with our lives and our shit in different ways, as best we can...”

Ming-ya!!! Were You Sleepin’???

https://www.facebook.com/notes/10150106213343225/

It’s been many years now since we’ve spoken… And though that isn’t going to change… I’d like to say here… Thanks, mom…

I don’t wish you dead… Every day you’re alive is another day you suffer the inglorious truth that your now adult children don’t speak to you and honestly hate you… Death doesn’t scare those who have lived a good life… The fact that’ll you will die someday scares the hell out of you…

The fact that you die without six friends to carry your box means they’ll have to bounce it down the church steps… You’re in for a bumpy ride to hell…

I’ve got a bottle of laxative just waiting for the day I shit on your grave… I want it really liquid, so it soaks right down to your box…

The harm you meant to cause is going to make me famous… Didn’t plan on that did you???

How Did I Get Here???

2014-08-05T00:46:00.002-04:00

“When we change the way we look at things… The things we look at change… “
Dr. Wayne Dyer

Stress… It had become the suit I woke up in, wore all day and slept in at night… A boring and unattractive outfit… I had almost given up any hope of wearing anything else…

“Would you be willing to go talk to someone???” Asked my attorney a little over a year ago during a meeting in his office…

An ungrateful and unreasonable soon to be ex-wife on the speaker phone… Unaware someone else was listening and totally unaware of how unattractive her own outfit of candy, potato chips and drama had become… She clung to the belief that she really was the joy to live with that she wanted everyone else to believe she was…

Sensing I had had enough as the phone conversation came to an end… He asked again… “Would you be willing to go talk to someone???” While handing me a piece of paper he had written a name and number on…

Texting the number upon my return home… I had nothing to lose, but the stress which was slowly killing me… An appointment made… With no clue as to what to expect… I met a wonderful woman Margo Plum www.angel-wing-wellness.com who has become a counselor and friend… The weight slowly began to be lifted from my shoulders… The stress I had been wearing slowly changing to a belief my world could be anything I wanted it to be… And filled with whatever I wanted to fill it with…

Slowly learning the Law of Attraction… Taking responsibility for not only creating the life I truly want… But also responsibility for filling my life with the things and stress I didn’t want… Never having truly understood (“knowing”) how our thoughts and words create our reality… I had attracted many things and the stress that came with them that I never wanted…

Discussing here the how’s and whys of attracting a lifetime of poor decisions, bad dating choices and the failed relationships they led to, self-sabotage following good decisions and negative energy would rapidly turn this blog in a direction it needs not to go…

This needs to be a positive discussion of the good things finally manifesting in my life now… Things that I am only now realizing I had no idea I was speaking into life many, many years before… Yes, I’m old…

Many of my faithful readers and others have heard how I always felt standup was something I could do… How as an 18yr old and above, I had frequented comedy clubs and thought what an awesome thing it would be to do it for a living (I didn’t know then the pay pretty much sucks)… But despite those thoughts and feelings I had never taken the steps to act on them except to routinely be the “life of the party guy”… More on this later…

They’ve also heard how then “life got in the way”… Enlisting and spending 9yrs in the Navy followed by what eventually would be more than 20yrs in the commercial nuclear power industry… During which I endured several failed marriages and numerous shitty relationships, the result of previous mentioned bad dating choices…

Through it all, though I had yet to be on stage, comedy was my relief… “Venting” to my buddies at work became my therapy… Their laughter medicine to my soul… Then one day in 2002 seeing an article in the Rochester, NY newspaper about an open mic, I decided to go… It was a wild night and the start of what’s been an even wilder ride… There’s been some stops and starts… The comedy train may have even jumped the tracks more than once… But that first night had me hooked…

I’ve told jokes all over the country… 40 states and if you count my time in the Navy… Several countries… I think those countries hate America now…

But in a moment of clarity just the other evening during some quiet time sitting outside with my boys… Maybe it was the universe reassuring me as the boys and I prepare for our next big adventure… Those times as the “life of the party guy” came to mind… Times I had not thought about for many, many years… Yes, I’m old…

As we sat facing west and watching the sunset… While the “life of the party guy” video played in my mind… The Law of Attraction became real in an astonishing way…

Things I said many, many times as a “joke” then many, many years before began to echo in my ears… Bouncing off the walls of the deep recesses of my empty head… Things I had said aided by youth’s ability to drink excessively and recreational drug use…

The times I had met some groans from my “party” audience with… “Hey, lots of people pay good money in Vegas to see the entertainment you’re getting for free…”

Or “I don’t care how far I have to go to tell a joke… I love to hear people laugh.”

And “Someday you’ll be sitting at home in bed watching Johnny Carson (I told you I was old) and I’ll be guest hosting The Late Show…”

I haven’t locked down that guest host gig yet… But in a “How did I get here???” moment… The universe told me… I manifested it… I didn’t know I was doing it then and all the misfortunes during the almost 30yrs when “life got in the way”… Weren’t really misfortunes… They were the universe getting that life out of the way…

Out of the way for the manifestation of things I unknowingly put in motion during my late teens and 20s… Yes, I’ll say it again… Aided by youth’s ability to drink excessively and recreational drug use…

It has been an eye opening realization that couldn’t have come at a better time… As the boys and I are less than 3 weeks away from leaving Idaho… We will be loading up the RV and heading to California for the Ventura Comedy Festival the end of August and September… We’ll be in California for a month before heading to Lake Havasu City, AZ… Laughlin, NV (Laughlin Laugh Fest) and another return engagement in Pinetop, AZ (My 4^th time there) the first week of October…

I have been submitting to casting calls and auditions to make the best possible use of my time while in California… Who knows maybe I’ll be headed right back there by the end of October… If I’m not headed back there then… Well, we will just have to see what the universe has in store for us… Lots of doors are starting to open and there are a host of possible destinations…

I mentioned in a status update a few days ago I had submitted to be an extra in “Fast and Furious 7” because “lots of people would pay good money” to see me blown up… Well, maybe not lots… But at least my ex’s…

The boys and I will be living in our RV during this leg of our adventure… I’ll be using public transportation as often as possible in California… And also posting a video blog to document as much of it as possible… I hope all of you will follow along and tell your friends and family to as well…

I’m trying to find a name for this leg of the adventure… But right now I can’t even think of a name for this blog… Any suggestions???

How did I get here??? Many years ago… Long before ever hearing anything about the Law of Attraction… Aided by youth’s ability to drink excessively and recreational drug use… I Manifested My Destiny… I’m right where I was always supposed to be… What a mind blowing and reassuring realization…

Human Touch

2014-06-28T16:25:00.002-04:00

I really could use some human to human interaction and something fun to do... I am “at home”… Sitting in an apartment in Idaho Falls with three sleeping dogs... They aren't very good at conversation... I need something fun to do and someone to do it with... That is what has been running through my mind for weeks...

In and out of town constantly since the end of November… I semi-bound here until my lease expires the end of August… With where I’m headed still to be determined… I have tried to make the most of my time at “home”… Spending time with my boys, writing as much as possible, editing old blogs in the hope of getting something published, and trying to enjoy at least some of what Idaho Falls offers as “eclectic” culture…

Occasionally heading out to hear some music and have a beer…

When I can find something besides metal… The structured and dominate culture of Idaho Falls has provided a home here for the most rebellious and worst music on earth… If you’re going to rebel… Might as well go big or shut up and go to church… Piercing and tattoos are the badges of rebellion amongst the locals who have grown up fighting the reins of control here…

So its Tuesday night concerts outside at the art museum and of course Wednesday night Alive After 5 for music and some beers…

The Alive After 5 crowd is usually a bit older, an eclectic mix transplants like me and locals who have lived their lives here in defiance of the prevailing culture… It has provided me ample opportunity to “people watch”… Finding a place to sit or stand amongst the crowd watching and listening… Listening to the music and the din of conversations… Surrounded by noise while watching people talking from a distance to far away to hear their words… Just seeing their lips move as almost in a movie… Their conversations can become anything I choose to imagine…

The inhumane working hours at INL keeps most of my former co-workers from these events… 12hr shift work with an hour drive on both ends of it... Very unhealthily doesn’t lend itself to extracurricular activities to easily…

Surrounded by people, conversation and noise… Yet ever alone… Just like at “home”… Streaming an Oriole game on the internet, surfing Facebook and meaningless dangling internet conversations… Always alone…

A caveat... It is far better to be alone than with the wrong company... Just because you follow this blog... Don't think you are missed...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g6fsILfvlug

Saturday to Saturday

2014-06-21T00:20:00.001-04:00

What a week... Riley, my 12 yr old Chocolate Lab and dog poop connoisseur must have mistaken bad poop for good poop last Saturday... Leading two almost three days of refusal to eat with multiple, ample vomits in the house and an equal number of carpet shampoos...

Noticing a few of my own health concerns yesterday had me at the VA clinic in the afternoon with a "call if it gets worse" diagnosis I was okay with... Til today...

But first... On our after breakfast hike this morning... JJ, my 10 yr old Black Lab decided that bathing himself in something dead might be a good way to attract Mormon bitches... Covered in the worst smell I have ever smelled... Got him lifted into the tub on our return home, we both ended up with a bath...

Still having some health concerns... I called the VA clinic and left a message... I was greeted by the nurse on the return call with this, "Get to the emergency room!!!" Not believing that lead me to stop again at the VA clinic just to be sure...

EIRMC Emergency... I have had some issues with them before... But today was great... An IV with two rounds of infused antibiotics and something to reduce inflammation... I feel much better... Total time out of my house (doorbell to doorbell) and with a list of things to do as long as the IV tube... 3hrs... Not bad...

I didn't get everything done on the list... But... At least I'm not living with a "motivational speaker" anymore... She can call it what she likes... I called it nagging...

Tomorrow morning at 11am (in case any paparazzi care to show up) I'll be back at EIRMC for a second round of antibiotic infusion... Hopfully that's all it takes... Saturday to Saturday... I need to go on the road again...

2007 Thoughts From The Road

2014-06-15T23:25:00.003-04:00

Came across this today... I was still living in Upstate NY when I wrote this on my first out of state road trip back in August of 2007... Yes... I edited it... See my comments about talk radio...

So anyway… What goes through a road comics mind or anyone’s mind during all those hours in the car???

My first stop on this trip was to home of my old Navy buddy Gary, in Toledo, Ohio… It’s more than a coincidence that it was Gary and I who made a cross-country trip from San Diego to Maine and back to San Diego in 1982… 31 states and 10,000 miles in 30 days…

Gas was cheaper back then that’s for sure… The camping is easier now though… Now I’m in a hotel room with a king sized bed… Or sleeping in my car... Then I was in a tent with a sleeping bag on the ground!!!…

The radio for one can certainly effect where your mind wanders off to… I can’t stand talk radio any longer… If I wanted to listen to people argue… I would have stayed married… So it’s usually music, a ballgame or just plain quiet time…

Constantly hitting the seek button as stations faded in and out… There must have been at least a half dozen stations or more of Prairie Home Companion yesterday as I reached the edge of Minnesota… Quick change the station!!!

Just kidding…

The Spanish guitar music I found on a classical station took me back in time again to San Diego and trips to Tijuana… Boots clunking on wooden sidewalks like a scene out of The Good, The Bad and The Ugly… I don’t think I will elaborate on that any further… We’ll stop right there on that thought…

The countryside is beautiful here… And it took some hearty people to settle it… Needless to say most of my sightseeing today will most likely be pioneer/western history associated… But as I thought about it yesterday… I remembered some scenes from the movie Monte Irvin… Originally starring Lee Marvin… The remake stars Tom Selleck… Both versions are excellent…

Anyway… Life on the frontier was changing… Fences were starting to be strung… The Prairie was being tamed… Old cowboy Monte was being asked to change along with it… His mind clouded by a bottle of whiskey… He almost considered it… Coming to his senses he refuses and tells the man asking him to change… “I won’t shit on my life!!!”

A cowboy he was and a cowboy he’d stay… Walking away, he drunkenly takes a buckin’ bronco ride through town to break a horse no one else could ride…

As the end of the movie nears… An old friend sitting on a porch in town spots him riding into to town… As a boy plays with a lasso nearby, already enamored with “playing cowboy”… The man on the porch says to him… “See that guy riding in he’s a “real cowboy”, he’ll teach you to throw that rope”…

To which Monte replies to the boy… “He’ll teach you to throw the rope… He’s a real cowboy, too… He just doesn’t remember being one.” (I might be paraphrasing that)

Asked where he had been, Monte replies… “Driving cattle from Mexico to Canada and getting paid for it…”

Why this long dissertation??? Well, a couple of reasons… One night in Chicago as I sat in the bar sipping a bottle of water before the show… Talking to the guy running the show… He introduced me to the kid who would be the MC that night… “This is Steve”, he said, “He’s a Road Comic.”

Smiling to myself yesterday while on the road, I thought… Yes, I drive from New York to North Dakota to tell jokes… And I get paid for it!!!

To my fellow road comics out there… Yes, the business is changing, but let’s not forget who we are… Watch both versions of the movie…

OK, time to giddy up into the shower and get back on the road…

Rollin’!!! Rollin’!!! Rollin’!!!

Keep those wheels rollin’,

Get ‘em up!!!

Move ‘em out!!!

Rawhide!!!

Idios Idaho

2014-05-25T16:46:00.000-04:00

Needing to put some coherent thoughts down for a few days now… I am sitting here struggling to start the word flow like an old guy with prostate problems struggles to start a piss…

Almost always the blog title comes first and I write from there… It’s not the case today… We’ll see what title comes when I’m done…

Leaving Tuesday night for a few days in Vegas, then Laughlin, NV over the weekend and Pinetop, AZ next Monday… Continuing to work on putting together a “Biker Bar” tour June – October around already booked work and an invite to the Ventura Comedy Festival in August and September…

As the calendar fills… Another decision looms… My apartment lease runs out the end of July and despite the disappointment it may bring to the ladies of Idaho Falls… I think it’s time to move… It’s time to move out of the comedy Siberia of southeast Idaho… Time to plant myself where there’s real and regular opportunities to perform…

So the discussion centers on where to go and the pros and cons of several places on my list… In no particular order…

Salt Lake City… Yes, there’s a lot of Mormons there… But there is also the big city diversity offered not found in Idaho Falls… There are certainly many more opportunities to perform than in Idaho Falls… But does it significantly cut down on the distance needed to drive for out of town gigs??? I don’t believe it does…

Vegas… Many opportunities to perform… Relatively much shorter drives to gigs in California, Arizona and New Mexico… Similar to Idaho it also offers the dry climate I prefer without the frigid winters… Unless I am on the road… I’d be able to blog from my hammock year round… I’ll spend some time there this week researching pet friendly apartments…

Seattle… The comedy scene on the northwest coast in Washington and Oregon is a happening scene… So there would seem to be many opportunities to perform there… The weather isn’t dry, but the winters are fairly mild… Of course, other things could place Seattle “higher” on the list…

Denver… While not really the mid-west it does put me somewhat closer to gigs in Middle-America… The local and surrounding area does provide ample opportunities to perform… The winters are a bit colder than Seattle’s but not as harsh as those in Idaho or the northeast… And just like Seattle… Other things could place Denver “higher” on the list…

California always sounds nice… But cost of living… Population density… Traffic… Make it a nice place to visit… But I don’t think I want to live there…

Northeast (NY)… Again… The cost of living… Taxes… Intrusive state government… Horrible winters... And swarms of insects to battle during the humid summers… Makes the northeast also a nice place to visit… But I KNOW I don’t want to live there…

Southern Mid-West… Ample opportunities to perform in a significant radius… Certainly less harsh winters than Northern Mid-West… But heading towards the humidity and insects of the eastern seaboard…

Southeast… Lots of opportunity to perform… Mild to no winters… Humidity and insects every summer…

So there’s a lot to think about and some personal pros and cons not listed here… Decision time is looming… Not moving would only be considered if there’s so much road work booked I don’t have time to move…

Oh and this blog title… “Idios Idaho”…

Tears of a Clown

2014-05-06T22:17:00.003-04:00

I hadn’t written a blog since shortly after the New Year, while I was still on the return to Idaho leg of long road trip…

Finished one last week and the voices in my head have been telling me they had more to say…

In last week’s blog I spoke of an older woman who approached me after a show… I won’t re-hash the story again here… If you missed it you can read it here…

But the voices are telling me there are other recent acquaintances who asked some interesting and thought provoking questions…

While discussing my life as a comic… And describing life on the road… I was met with this comment… “It sounds like a lonely life.” Yes, yes it can be… I will refer you an earlier post made by my friend and fellow comic Stu McCallister …

Yes, it can be lonely… But to me… There is no better feeling in the world than coming on stage…

Hey… Don’t judge me!!! It’s exciting on stage!!!

But then just last week… Someone I had met just days earlier looked me in the eye and asked… “Do you ever cry???”

Huh??? Another thought provoking question…

“Do you ever cry??? Do comedians ever cry??? Comedians tell jokes… Are you ever sad???”

I would hope that most of you who know me already also know the answer to that question… But I find the posing of the question in the first place very interesting… Many of you may have already read this – But I offer it here again in response to that question…

While also adding this story with an addendum from this past weekend…

Though it’s a story I thought I had written about before… I can find it nowhere… I know I have told it to at least a few of you… Including the person who asked me if comics cry…

Easter week 2013 I returned to NY for the first time in three years…

Unfortunately, it was to attend the funeral of a beloved uncle… It was good to see family and friends despite the circumstances…

Fortunately, I was also able to visit with the parents of my best friend of 40 something years… A friendship that has survived my years in the Navy… Distance… And time… Paul’s dad had suffered a stroke shortly before my visit… But he was up, alert and very much able to visit… Blessed by the visit… I knew in my heart when I shook his hand and said goodbye that it truly was…

Returning to Idaho… I was visited a few months later… Towards the end of May… By that little voice… Telling me to call Paul… I repeatedly used the 2hr time zone difference as an excuse not to call… Deep inside, I knew… But I didn’t want to hear it…

Last Memorial Day, having spent the day grilling and listening to baseball… I settled in front of my computer about 11pm… Again using the 2hr time zone difference as an excuse not to call… A phone call 30minutes later bringing me to my feet… It was Paul… It was 130am in New York… Exchanging some hellos and a how are you??? In mid-sentence on another subject, Paul shared the news… I already knew…

Tears now streaming both our faces… I told him I had known days earlier… Despite our tears, we marveled again at our connection that despite the 2000mile separation, after 40 something years was as strong as ever…

Both lifelong Baltimore Orioles fans… Paul’s not a Facebook guy… So I looked forward to calling him Sunday from Target Field in Minnesota to say I was at the Orioles/Twins game…

And then it happened again… Checking the box scores a day earlier… Paul said, he had thought of the many hours we spent through the years… Playing, watching and talking baseball… A day later I called from the game…

Yeah, comics cry… But sometimes they are happy tears… Grateful for a friendship that has survived the challenges of distance and time to be as strong as ever…

Deep Thoughts From My Hammock...

2014-04-27T19:25:00.000-04:00

Comedy IS good medicine…

Mildly called to task this morning for “Mormon Bashing” which led to an interesting discussion… Deep thoughts… And sharing of a recent post show happening…

First, I make no apologies for any “religion bashing” that may occur during any exchange with me… Be it face to face… Text… Instant Message… Or comments on a post…

The “Rules” of all religions have certainly done more harm thru the centuries, than any help they may have provided… Yes, I bash Mormons… Most of the audiences I play to now have had it up to their eyeballs with them…

Personally, I have had it up to my eyeballs also with their sense of moral superiority and knowledge of right and wrong…

But after 12 years of Catholic School… I don’t have a whole lot of good to say about them either… Unfortunately, because I’m currently living in Idaho I don’t get to use that material on stage as often as I’d like… The only Catholics I find here… Only speak “Canadian”… At least they tell me that’s where they are from when they find out I am from Neuva Jork…

But I digress… Recently I did have an opportunity to do some “Catholic Bashing” during a show not in Idaho… The Catholic School material was easily accepted and light heartedly laughed at… Or so I thought… Until coming off stage…

Standing at the bar greeting people after the show… I was timidly approached by an older woman who with tears in her eyes… Felt the need to thank me for “Bashing the Catholics” as she then proceeded to share with me the mental mistreatment she suffered at the hands of Catholic School nuns…

For at least 50 years she had been carrying that pain around… I was more than a little stunned… All I could think to do was hug her…

“Catholic Bashing”… “Mormon Bashing”… “Religion Bashing”…

Call it whatever you like… I call it talking about things people have tried to hide in the closet of a Penalty Box (confessional) for too long… Talking about things they were told not to talk about… Talking about things they were told not use their supposedly god given brain to question…

Richard Pryor changed this country by talking about racism… I make no claims to ever have the same effect…

But comedy IS good medicine… If by making jokes… Yes, even by “Bashing”… I can cause a few people to stop… To think… To question… To change… Then hopefully they in turn can make a few others stop, think, question and change…

And then maybe as John Lennon said… Maybe then we can “Imagine”…

The only heaven… The only hell… Is what they chose to create here… Maybe, maybe… Just maybe I can get them to think about creating more heaven on earth… And a lot less hell…

Fuck… Too Deep…

Life Lessons from the Road

2014-01-05T21:25:00.000-05:00

Ok…I’m six weeks into this big adventure and it’s time I shared some thoughts and some thanks… Life Lesson # 1… Gratitude…

To the clubs and bookers who have given me an opportunity to chase this crazy dream… And of course a thanks in advance for future work…

To the fellow comics I have shared stages with these past six weeks… It has been an honor to do what we love together…

In no particular order… Steve McInelly, Kelsey Coles, Brett Crandall, Brent Podosek, Jeff Albright, Eric at Loonees, Ron Ferguson, Owen Straw, Chris Speyrer, Steve Caminiti, John “Gonzo” Means, Dan Conlin, Mike Gardner, JF Harris, Nate Bargetze, Vinnie Paulino, Brian McBride, Artie Fletcher, Tom Anzalone, Doug MacCraw, Entertainment Max, Eric Yoder, Joel Pace, Mike Walter and Tribble Run…

To the people who attend comedy shows… Thank you… Your laughter is why we do this…

Of course, I won’t forget to send a big “High” Five to the people of Colorado…

To the Denny’s in Denver… Thanks for nothing… The nothing that was left in me after two days of battling food poisoning…

Life Lesson # 2 & 3… Never trust a fart miles from a roadside rest stop and never eat at Denny’s anywhere again… When I need gas I’m pullin’ up to the “Full Service” Pumps… #kum&go

To my beautiful twin sister, Michele and my brother in-law Tom… Thank you for everything… It was a great 3 days… Let’s not wait three years to do it again… Stay warm I know it’s snowing there now…

To my family and friends in Rochester, NY… Tracey, Jeff, Mike, Linda, and Paul, my best friend of 43 yrs… It was only two weeks… But the best two weeks of the whole trip…

To Ted and DeeDee… Thanks again for loving and caring for my boys… The hardest part of this trip has been missing them…

Life Lesson # 4… Friends and Family are Forever…

Tracey, thanks for the bottle of wine… It made being snowed in on NYE quite enjoyable…

To “Old Man Winter” thanks for making the drive a real adventure at times…

Life Lesson # 5… Always pack food, a blanket and long underwear…

To “Juan Valdez” thanks for picking those coffee beans… You know you've had too much coffee when you stop to pee and have to go again by the time you walk back to the car...

To my Facebook Friends… Some of you I’ve met… Some of you I have not… Some of you are family… Some of you are not… Thanks to all of you for following along… Texting you, reading and replying to your status updates and comments while driving has helping make the many hours alone in the car not seem so alone…

Life Lesson # 6… Take a chance… Send a friend request to someone you’ve never met… You never know who you might meet…

That’s all for now folk’s…

Overture, curtains, lights,
This is it, the night of nights
No more rehearsing and nursing a part
We know every part by heart
Overture, curtains, lights
This is it, we'll hit the heights
And oh what heights we'll hit
On with the show this is it

Tonight what heights we'll hit
On with the show this is it

Come See a Show...

2013-12-06T12:15:00.002-05:00

Up coming December shows:

Friday/Saturday December 6 & 7 Mason City Limits Comedy Club 8pm
Thursday December 12 Laugh Comedy Club Bloomington, IL 8pm
Friday/Saturday December 13 & 14 Laugh Comedy Club 7 & 930pm
Friday/Saturday December 20 & 21 Joke Factory Comedy Club - Rochester NY 8pm

Thankful Shout Outs Along the Manifest Destiny Tour

2013-12-05T14:17:00.000-05:00

With my boys safely in the loving care of Uncle Ted and Aunt Dee Dee Williams in Port Orchard, WA… I’m thankful for Dee Dee’s daily text updates and pics…

I’m halfway through my second week on the road and it’s time for an update… And a thankful shout out to those who are following along…

My retirement comedy show Friday, November 22^nd at the Idaho Falls Elks was a rousing success with over 100 in attendance… Many thanks to all those who came out to the show… I won’t say I’m missing Idaho Falls… But I am looking forward to sharing some laughs with friends and former co-workers when I return...

On the road the following Sunday… For what turned out to be a “Mile High” week in Denver… With shows at The East Coast in Fort Collins, The Lobby in Denver and Loonee’s in Colorado Springs… Many thanks to comedy buddy Brett Crandall and his extended family for the holiday hospitality…

It was great to meet some of the Denver area’s local comics… Brent Podosek and Jeff Albright to name a few… Fun and interesting, “interactive” audiences in Colorado last week…

I have already documented with Facebook updates the lousy two days following breakfast at Denny’s on my way out of Denver… Feeling stronger and again heading east, the unseasonably warm weather cooperating… I spent two nights road comic camping on my way to Mason City, IL where I will be featuring for Steve Caminiti this weekend (Fri/Sat) at Mason City Limits… Another thankful shout out to fellow comic and club owner Chris Speyrer…

An appearance last night at Donnie B’s an hour south of Mason City in Springfield, IL and another tonight an hour north in Peoria, IL at the Jukebox… It feels great to be on stage almost daily… Finally doing what I was born to do… With the cooler December weather finally beginning to catch up to me today, it feels great to stand in the warmth of the stage lights again…

Taking my car in for a brake check up tomorrow… Then heading east again no later than Monday with a stop in Champaign, IL to see my twin sister… She’s the good looking one… I’m the funny one…

Then heading to NY for my Comedy Homecoming shows at The Joke Factory in Rochester, NY December 20 & 21… It will be great to laugh with family and old friends again…

Yes, this blog read is boring… But life has never been more exciting…

Stuck Inside of Mullan with the Idaho Blues Again

2013-11-17T01:34:00.000-05:00

Starting a long, but uneventful drive with the boys approximately 6pm Thursday evening from Idaho Falls to Port Orchard, Washington… Including two one hour stops for naps, we arrived 15hrs later tired but no worse for wear… Though the car is FULL of dog hair…

Spent Friday reminiscing with an old shipmate and catching up on the last 30 years… The boys are safe and happy with Uncle Ted, Aunt DeeDee and Cousin Tilly…

After a great dinner, a goodnight’s rest, coffee and a nice breakfast… I said my thank you to Ted and DeeDee and my goodbyes to the boys, while DeeDee cried… Stopping soon enough to almost immediately start sending me pictures and updates… I sincerely appreciate the quick emotional attachment… The boys have that way about them… I know they will be loved… ;)

Not sure what time I hit the road this morning… But the ride through the Cascade Mountain passes was clear and easy… Making great time and a command decision to stop for something to eat in Northern Idaho, still west of Missoula… The great time evaporated quickly evaporated as snow began to fall… Interstate 90 shut down for all intents and purposes with traffic backed up for miles… I was not going to spend this night camping in my car… Exiting the highway in Mullan, ID… I am spending the night at the Lookout Motel… Happy to have found a room… It’s clean and warm… I am grateful… Though the bed seems to have backache written all over it…

Thus my Facebook status update… Note to self… Next road trip pack booze… There isn’t much nearby and I’m not about to go out in the lousy weather looking for some… Given the situation a nightcap or two or three would have certainly been enjoyed…

Hoping I will wake to clear skies and an open road tomorrow… I’m grateful to have a portable internet hotspot and my laptop with me… So I can surf Facebook and write this blog…Though it might have been fun to write it drunk…

There’s more I wanted to say… But now the rest seems like maybe it should have its own blog… Sleep may not come easy tonight…

A Dog Tale...

2013-11-08T22:30:00.000-05:00

Many years ago in a galaxy far, far away… Fall 1977 Rochester, NY…

As I sat with friends in the cafeteria of Monroe Community College I mentioned in passing that I was considering enlisting in the Navy… Someone I had never met… But sitting within ear shot of the conversation… Interrupted… Yes, it’s been many years… I remember only one detail of the ensuing conversation about his time in the service… “If you do… You will make friends that will last a lifetime.”

A few weeks later, I did enlist… And many years later it continues to be proven true…

This week I posted on FB that I needed a temporary home for my three dogs… That same day I received a FB message from a friend I haven’t seen since 1982, when I left the boat in San Diego…

We can marvel at the wonders of the Internet and FB making it easy to stay in touch… But even that is relatively new… A lot of years had passed between us before it was even possible…

I prefer to marvel at the generosity extended, when he and his wife offered to take my boys for me while I am on the road for the next two months… Now living in Port Orchard, WA with his wife and their 9 yr. old yellow lab… Who will be getting three wonderful playmates to share 2.5 acres of woods with… The boys will be happy and safe… I didn’t have to break them up to find them homes… I didn’t have to do the unthinkable and condemn them to death by dropping them at the shelter… There are a lot of wags left in those tails…

So next Thursday afternoon the boys and I will load up for a car ride to the coast… A 12 hr drive according to Google that will most likely take at least 15 with gas stops, pee breaks and most likely a nap in the car for me somewhere along the way… The adventure of life continues…

Thanks, Ted, for making this a happy tale…

Manifesting My Destiny

2013-10-31T16:53:00.000-04:00

Having given the contents of today’s blog much thought… It may read as more of a stream of consciousness… A stream with several beginnings… Maybe more than one middle and definitely an ending waiting to be written somewhere out on the comedy road…

I am exactly three weeks from beginning the biggest adventure of my life… I have made the commitment to “Manifest My Destiny” on the comedy road full time… Thursday November 21^st will be my last day at the Idaho National Laboratory…

I am 57 years old… I don’t intend to die sitting alone in a facility control room or while riding the bus an hour each way… While wishing I had given this an honest shot…

As a member of the Idaho Falls Elks Club #1087… I have booked a Retirement Party/Going Away show there for Friday November 22^nd…

I expect to be on the road by Sunday November 24^th, headed east… I have three open weeks… I am asking for “a little help from my comedy friends” to fill with some comedy work on my drive east…

I am booked to feature at the new Joke Factory in my home town of Rochester, NY December 20 – 21… Except for a funeral I haven’t been there in more than 3yrs…

Returning now for something much happier… I am looking forward to laughing with many family and friends at the shows and over the Christmas holiday… Many thanks to Artie Fletcher for the opportunity to perform close to home this holiday season…

Leaving Rochester… I again asking for “a little help from my comedy friends” to fill in the three weeks after Christmas as I head to St. Croix, WI and Shakopee, MN for my first gigs as part of the Entertainment Max roster… January 9 – 11...

I am excited to be working for Entertainment Max… Though disappointed it falls the same weekend of the Idaho Laugh Fest… Maybe it’s professional progress to have to turn down an invitation to a comedy festival because of previously scheduled paid work…

Heading west from there back towards Idaho Falls… The calendar is need of even more “help from my comedy friends” until I head to California the end of February again for this year’s SLO Festival… You can see video of my performance at last year’s SLO Festival here… Steve 'The Nuclear Guy' from Entertainers Worldwide Ltd

As I ask for “a little help from my comedy friends” in filling my calendar and making the chasing of this dream possible… Please my friends… Read Part II of this blog and realize the sacrifice I am making to chase this… Please don’t let this sacrifice be made in vain…

PART II

The hardest part of writing this blog… And a big request for “a little help from my Idaho friends”… Some of you may already know what I need to ask… I think all of you know it is breaking my heart to have to ask this… You all know what they mean to me… But if I am going to chase this crazy dream…

I need to find a home or homes for my boys… Temporary or permanent… I would love to keep them together, but realize that might not be possible… They are the most amazing animals… Smart, affectionate and loving to everyone… Always looking for playmates… They get along well with all other animals…

Riley, the chocolate lab is the oldest at 11.5 years old… He turns 12 in June… Still spry for his age… He needs a safe and loving place to live out his years…

JJ, the black lab/beagle mix is 9.5 years old… He’ll be 10 in August… Probably the smartest of the three… He is also the most energetic during our trips to the dog park… He’s quiet, patient and loves to give hugs to everyone he meets…

Simon, the yellow lab is 8.5 years old… He’ll be 9 the end of July… The baby of the three… He truly is a big baby and needs a place where he’ll be babied and loved…

I am running short on time to find them a home or homes… Please Idaho I need someone to step up… If you or anyone you know who may be willing to adopt or foster (maybe indefinitely) please let me know as soon as possible…

Desert Nights

2013-09-03T23:34:00.000-04:00

Originally planning to work on editing old blogs and short stories for my book while on last weekend’s adventure into the Idaho desert… It was immediately obvious that rehashing old stories while living a new adventure just wasn’t going to happen…

While the laptop containing all the old stories had been brought along… The desert dust convinced me it might be a better idea not to take it from the back pack… A pen and paper it would be… Sometimes old ideas are the better ideas…

Though testing fine the night before we left… RV generator problems also meant I would have been limited by laptop battery life… Luckily I had plenty of ice to keep food and beer cold since the RV fridge wasn’t running correctly without the generator, either…

Riley had reminded me earlier that Lewis and Clark crossed the country with no generators, refrigerators or propane stoves… I could still cook food so our adventure continued…

While two solar powered spot lights lit up the area outside the RV… It was eerily quiet each night… The boys breathing and the sound of my pen scratching across the paper in the lantern light the only sounds…

We were alone in the wilderness… Back east the wilderness always meant forest… Here there are no trees to be seen for as far as the eyes can see…

The smell of sage brush crushed by the tires of the RV is one of the most awesome smells in the world…

Beautiful desert flowers I have dug up to plant in a pot at home… Are safer than some of my poisonous relationships… Looked nice… But should never have touched…

Sitting outside in a camping chair darkness surrounding me… It’s a different kind of stage… But just like stand-up comedy… I was on it alone… The light of the lantern acting as the stage spotlight… Desert moths dancing in the light are the only hecklers at these shows…

The magnificent night sky fills with stars in the darkness… Like candles on show room tables they are the only thing I can see staring into the sky… The place is packed every night…

The road comic adventure is beginning again in earnest…

My last day at the Idaho National Lab is November 21^st… My notice has been given… The decision immediately questioned... Tragically confirmed in my own mind by the sudden death at 52 of a Facebook friend I had never met… I’m 57 and I’m going to go out doing what I want…

It requires no more discussion…

A keg in the corner and a two drink minimum… My DVD on loop on a big screen TV at my wake… Play Dennis Leary’s “I’m an Asshole” at my funeral… And fill my pockets with fireworks before you send me to the crematorium… I’ll go out with a bang…

All that’s left is to manifest a full calendar of work…

Booked to feature at the new Joke Factory in Rochester, NY December 20 & 21… I look forward to some much needed laughing with family and friends for the holidays…

The triumphant return home of a prodigal son… My comedy once lost has now been found…

Eventually the old blogs and short stories may be edited into a book… But the important stories are the ones to come… The ones that will tell a love story… With the stage… The road and the people who encouraged me and helped me to find my comedy again… I travelled 2000 miles to meet them…

Wherever the comedy winds take me… They will travel in gratefulness with me in my heart…

Blackjack Riley

2013-03-11T23:52:00.004-04:00

Your name was Blackjack, but everyone just called you Jack. A black lab retriever and my fabulously, faithful, floppy eared, furry, friend. I'm just remembering you today as I often do my friend.

Remembering how you loved to head to the water on the hot summer days and your daily visits to the neighbors for treats. Which often led me there for a visit also, only to find you on their sofa in front of the TV. "Can my dog come home now?" I'd say.

You never seemed to think you were a dog and I guess you were right. You certainly were more than just a dog. You, who were always there with a willing ear and a sloppy kiss as you'd climb up onto the sofa and put your head in my lap. Just an ear scratch and a belly rub was all you would ask.

"Jack the Licker" we'd call you or of course "Jack Riley", since you certainly had the life. You still are such an example my friend, never an unkind word (or bark) for anyone. Not even for the neighbor’s cats, who took over your doghouse and made it the neighborhood "cat house".

Remembering how you willingly tolerated (you actually loved the attention) having to wear your doggy antlers at Christmas. And how you proudly wore your fire helmet and rode in a fire truck during the parades. And your Halloween bandana as you "trick-or-treated" to the neighbors again for bacon strips.

You were never judgmental and so full of life and love, love given unconditionally to all. But especially me, for 16yrs my friend you always seemed to know when I needed it most.

I remember now the games of "biscuitball" and walks in the park with your lease in your mouth. "He's taking himself for a walk" I'd tell everyone.

"He's died and went to heaven", everyone said the day you came to live at the lake with me. No, my friend you brought heaven to me.

It's 15 years years now, since you've been gone. I remember that day so clear, the most difficult day of my life. The day I repaid you for all of your unconditional love. Barely able to walk, but with a heart so brave, I lifted you into the truck and stopped to buy you donuts on the way. Proud to the end, you would not be carried into the vets that day. Silently you walked in and lay on the floor, three grown adults cried as they watched.

That heart so strong, it almost refused to stop. But finally you rested, a rest so deserved. Now you're in doggie heaven, I'm sure and chasing slow rabbits is your reward.

We miss you, my friend and Zeekee, the cat who runs with you now, too. She slept in your spot until it was her turn to join you. Riley was your namesake, chocolate he was though and bigger too, plus the little black lab, JJ (Jack Junior)... Simon, the yellow lab. They sat together with Zeekee to keep her warm and say goodbye on her last day...

Friends you would have been, playmates I'm sure. They've all joined you now... And there's a new kitty in the house... I miss you my friend... XXX