Butler Life

Back to Normal... Whatever That Means

2015-10-27T10:16:00.001-07:00

It was a long summer. Literally long, because 80 degree weather started in May this year, a good month and a half earlier than normal. That month felt even longer waiting for an overdue baby girl.

Then the days all ran together with feeding and pumping and sleeping and not sleeping and trying to entertain a two year old while rocking a newborn to sleep all day.

Just as we were beginning to settle in, we went to the mountains for a week with friends. And then home to reset again. Right at the three month mark, we finally felt like we could take a breath. Bedtime for both kids got really easy, the baby was sleeping all night and napping well during the day. Phew.

Then came Labor Day weekend. I went to bed one night and woke up with a horrible pain wrapping around my ribs and stomach. A trip to the ER and an ultrasound later, and I needed surgery to remove my gall bladder. Less than two weeks later, I had the surgery, and exactly one week after that we left for a previously planned 10 days in Colorado to visit friends and family.

Being one week out from surgery, I didn't really feel great the entire trip. Add in a teething toddler and 90 degree weather and I've had more restful vacations. :)

But now we've been back for a few weeks, and we actually get a chance to settle in. I just said to Mike last night that I finally feel normal again. I feel like myself. After 9 months of morning sickness, childbirth, dealing with a newborn, hormones, surgery, etc. it is a relief to physically and emotionally feel healthy.

So we're home. We're enjoying fall and looking forward to whatever the rest of the year brings. Hopefully no more surgeries. :)

The Day June Was Born

2015-07-10T14:29:00.001-07:00

If you read about the birth of our first kid, you know it was a looong process. He was a nearly nine pound sunny side up baby with a huge head who had to be vacuumed out. Obviously the only thing we cared about for this birth was that she was born safely, and that she and I were both healthy. I felt like a good birth experience would be icing on the cake. Amazingly, it ended up being everything I could have hoped for.

They say first babies are always late. My first was four days late, so I figured this one would come earlier than that. My mom flew out two days before I was due so that Mike and I could get a little break before the baby was born. That was May 20th. Well, fast forward to Friday, May 29th, one week after my due date, and still no baby! Oops. I had been to the doctor the day before for a non stress test, was 3 cm dilated, and we scheduled an induction for Monday. It was really hot that Friday and none of us felt like cooking, so we decided to drive up to Central Market (it's like a local Whole Foods) to hit up their salad bar and get some Macrina bread.

A few minutes into the drive, I had my first contraction. I'd had Braxton Hicks contractions for months, but those don't hurt, so when I had one that felt a little crampy, I knew this may be it. I still didn't want to get my hopes up though! Between 5:30 pm and 7 pm, I had maybe 4 or 5 contractions. After we put Nash to bed around 7:30 pm, they started picking up to around 5 minutes apart. With Nash, I had contractions five minutes apart for 15 hours before I was progressed enough to be admitted. In fact, we were sent home once because the first time we went in I was only 2 cm. My goal was to just not get sent home. :)

We watched a little tv since I wasn't really in much pain at this point, but contractions were holding steady at 4-5 minutes apart. Around 8:30 pm, Mike and I packed some last minute things and decided to try to rest for a while before it was time to go to the hospital.

A funny aside: my sister in law Aaron was going to be at the birth (she ended up being out of town! sad!) and months ago I invited my other sister in law McCayla to be there if she wanted to. We hadn't talked about it for a while, and that afternoon she texted me and was like, "Can I still come?" I obviously said yes. Sometime in here I sent her a text that said, "Keep your phone on tonight."

Well, it turns out I was in too much pain to rest, so I ended up doing things like straightening my hair, packing and repacking toiletries, and random iPhoning. Once they were every 3-4 minutes apart and every third contraction was REALLY bad (I felt it majorly in my hips, which was weird), I decided to call the hospital. This was around 10 pm I think. Since I was able to talk to the nurse even through contractions, she told me to wait an hour or two and call back. I lasted about 45 minutes. :)

At 10:45 pm I called back and was like, "We're coming in." Now things got a little tricky because of our two year old and because my mom wanted to be there for the birth (and I wanted her there too.) Mike loaded up both of our cars. He got Nash into one car so my mom could drive him to my brother's house then come meet us at the hospital. Then he loaded me into the other car, and off we went!

We got there around 11:15 pm, and I just remember thinking "Please be 4 cm, please be 4cm." That way we could be admitted. Well we got checked and I was a 7!!! We seriously couldn't believe it. Even the nurse who admitted us was like, "You were so calm and joking around, I thought you were a 4, MAYBE a 5."

This was right after we found out I was 7 cm. So relieved! #doublechin

Since I was already so progressed, I was like, "Epidural, please!" (Give birth however you want, but I loved both of my epidurals and I would absolutely do it again. I LOVE my hospital and totally trust my doctor to only intervene as much as necessary. I also liked how calm and peaceful it all was. Thanks, drugs.)

The epidural was in around 1 am, then they broke my water. I was feeling a lot of pressure and wanting to push, but was still only 8 cm, so we just hung out for a while. By 2:30ish I was 10cm, so they had me push a few times. Everyone was expecting her to come out really quickly. In fact multiple nurses kept saying, "Five pushes and she'll be out!" because they knew about my previous five hours of pushing. In my mind I was like, "Hahahahaha! Yeah right." Anyway, after a few pushes, they decided to have me labor down for another hour because she was still a bit high.

Around 1 am, then they broke my water. I was feeling a lot of pressure and wanting to push, but was still only 8 cm, so we just hung out for a while. By 2:30ish I was 10cm, so they had me push a few times. Everyone was expecting her to come out really quickly. In fact multiple nurses kept saying, "Five pushes and she'll be out!" because they knew about my previous five hours of pushing. In my mind I was like, "Hahahahaha! Yeah right." Anyway, after a few pushes, they decided to have me labor down for another hour because she was still a bit high.

Right after 4 am, they had me try pushing again, and that's when we found out we had another posterior baby. Ugh! That explained the horrendous hip pain and the urge to push before I was fully dilated. It also explained why those pushes the hour before didn't move her down very much. The nurse on duty kept saying, "You can do this, you aren't going to push for five hours, you won't need a vacuum." Since she wasn't a very touchy feely person, I totally believed her. She was the absolute perfect person for that last hour.

Best husband ever. We were in it together. :)

So I pushed. It was really hard, and I just kept thinking that I could not do this for five hours again. When she still wasn't out after 40 minutes, I remember looking at Mike and we almost had a breakdown moment. But I chose to believe the doctor telling me that she was almost out (even though I heard that for literally THREE hours before Nash was actually born.) But then five minutes later at 4:50 am she was born! The best part was not being totally exhausted and out of it like I was the first time. My epidural was perfect: I could feel everything, but it wasn't painful. I felt her being born and they put her right on my chest which was amazing. Mike and I just cried because we were so happy she was here, and it was such a great experience this time.

June was 8 lbs. 8 oz. and was 21.5 inches long.

Thank you mom for taking these pictures and for cutting the cord!

The one weird thing was that last few hours of labor my heart rate was really high and my temperature kept rising. They were worried about infection, so June and I both got antibiotics and we had to stay for 48 hours after the birth instead of just 24. It ended up that we didn't have an infection, but it turned out to be a good thing because we got lots of breastfeeding help. It did not go well at all with Nash, so the extra hospital day gave me a lot more confidence. (And so far so good.)

She had to wear this huge thing on her arm to keep the iv in place.

My mom and McCayla left to go take naps since they had been up all night. My mom brough Nash back later with my brother Tom, Aaron (who luckily flew back to town a few hours after June was born!), and their daughter Olive, who LOVES baby June. It's so cute. Then Mike's brother John and McCayla came back with their son Miles and brought Mike some dinner.

First family pic!

My beautiful mom!

It's funny, even though we were exhausted, the hospital stay was almost like a mini vacation for us! Haha! We watched movies, drank some champagne, and one night Mike picked up some fancy desserts from a nearby restaurant.

About her name: June is a name that we have loved for a long time. It was on our girl's list (for first and middle) when I was pregnant with Nash. When I got pregnant this time, it was never really a discussion, that was just her name. We like it Mike's and my birthdays are in June, one day apart. We also like that it's a little nod to our nephew Noah, whose life was contained entirely in the month of June, making it the most special month there is. And while we're at it, Mike's twin brother (duh), my brother's wife, our other nephew, and my grandma all have June birthdays. They can all claim she was named for them if they want. :) The middle name, much like last time, wasn't official until the very end. We love the name Austin: it's where we got engaged, and I spent a lot of time in the Texas Hill Country as a kid. But then it sounds like we messed up Jane Austen or something. In the end we decided we didn't care because we liked it the best.

Our little June is here, and we're so glad she is!

Baby June

2015-06-19T14:07:00.001-07:00

Well, "Mayby" is here! She was almost a June baby, which is funny because the name we had chosen is June. On May 30, eight days after her due date, she finally showed up, and since then we've been taking it easy adjusting to life as a family of four. More to come...

June Austin Butler

May 30, 2015 • 4:50 AM

8 lbs 8 oz • 21.5 inches

Mayby: 36 Weeks

2015-04-24T13:16:00.000-07:00

We are getting sooooooo close. I cannot wait! It's funny because the first time around, I couldn't have honestly said I was excited. I was so scared and anxious about the enormous life change that was about to happen to us. We obviously wanted a baby, but the reality of it was terrifying.

This time it's a lot more exciting. We know what to expect (within reason, every kid is different), and the whole thing feels so much less scary than last time. That's not to say there aren't anxieties, but this time we are going in with our eyes wide open instead of totally blind.

We know that there is a good chance that I won't produce enough milk, so for the first month or so, I'll be nursing and pumping like crazy, taking fenugreek, etc. And if I'm not making enough, I will have NO problem supplementing with formula or just giving up nursing all together. This time it won't take two months to figure out that our baby is starving. :)

We also know that it's likely I will have post-partum depression again. (I've literally been writing a post about it for a year. Someday I'll post it.) I will be leaving the hospital with anti-depressants in hand this time instead of waiting for five months to seek treatment.

We also set up some boundaries for visitors the first month. Mike and I are both introverts, and we recharge by being alone, be it with each other or on our own. So for the first month, we are only allowing our parents and siblings to visit, and we are kicking them out at 6:30 pm each night. Then we can have time alone as a family before Nash goes to bed, and time as a couple after that. Nash's nap time is also going to be a no visitor time, so that I can have alone time with the baby. Last time we had people in our house 24-7, we had random friends and relatives stopping by most days, and we had 20 people over for Easter dinner when Nash was two weeks old! (Our moms totally did all of the work, but still. There were 20 people in our house!) We LOVE and adore all of our family and friends, we just think these boundaries will be helpful in the transition to being a family of four.

I realize these boundaries mean that our house will be less clean, there will be less laundry done, and fewer meals prepared for us. But honestly all I want is time and space to enjoy our new baby. Because of the nursing issues and PPD, I really didn't enjoy those first few months with Nash. I was overwhelmed by everything, and when our nephew died a few months later, I completely lost it. In addition to overwhelming grief, I felt an incredible amount of guilt having a healthy baby that stressed me out so much. But seriously that's another post for another day.

I am excited to really revel in the newborn phase, and thankful that our family is so awesome in supporting us and what we need the first month or so. That time and space is going to be so great as we adjust, and we are excited to welcome our little girl home!

Anyway, we are just trucking along for the next 4 weeks! The nursery is pretty much done. We still need to raise the crib back up to infant height, but it's officially girly in there! I packed my hospital bag this week, too, because I'm a freak, but I just kept thinking about it and wanted it done in case anything weird happened and she came early. I don't actually think that will happen, but you never know! I also packed a bag for Nash in case baby comes before my mom comes to town, and he needs to spend the night at my brother's house or something.

I semi-regret having everything done though, because now the next four weeks are going to drag! Haha! We'll see what happens!

Big Boy Room

2015-04-16T13:38:00.000-07:00

You guys. It finally happened. A parenting thing was easier than I thought it would be. That particular thing was moving Nash out of his crib into a huge bed in a new room! This is really exciting for us because we have basically been homebound since the end of August when he outgrew/refused to sleep in his pack-n-play. Although, we found out I was pregnant a few weeks later, so it's not like I was up for leaving the house for more than 30 minutes. Anyway, with baby sister coming at the end of May, we knew we needed to make our move to give him time to adjust.

I think the last time I shared nursery pictures, was here. We added nursery stuff into our existing guest room, and kept our office in the smaller spare bedroom since Mike was still working on his MBA. Well, when Nash was a few months old, Mike finished up school, so we turned the smaller bedroom into his nursery, and the old guest room/nursery became a guest room/office/dumping ground. When it came time to figure out what to do with baby number two, we decided to keep the nursery where it is, move a small desk into our master bedroom, and turn the guest room into Nash's new room. Still following? :)

It's a bummer to lose our guest room, because both sets of grandparents live out of state. Thankfully both have other options of places to stay when they come to town, and hopefully we will move in the next one or two years to a bigger place.

Anyway, we didn't want to get rid of a perfectly good queen sized bed (our guest bed) to then have to buy a twin bed, so Nash has a HUGE bed all to himself. Mike and I would be lying if we said we weren't jealous. It looks very cozy and comfortable!

The airplane art is a set of three stretcher frames that used to be covered in fabric in the tv room, but were relegated to a closet for a few years. After cutting out an airplane shape, I made a super janky projector with a shoebox, saran wrap, and the flashlight on my iPhone. Don't judge. Then I traced it and filled in the outline with red paint.

I was going to just leave the existing white duvet cover that we had, but then Ikea tempted me with an adorable twin sized one. I just cut it open and sewed it to an old queen sized flat sheet we had to make a new queen sized duvet cover. It was super easy, and the fabric is so cute. It's all different kinds of vehicles, and Nash loves to point out what each of them are.

The only big item we bought was a shelf thing (also from Ikea) to hold books and toys. So far it has worked out really well. And the little grey drawers (which used to hold office supplies) work perfectly for nighttime diapers, socks, shoes, and things we don't use as often like gloves, hats, and swimsuits. Cloth diapers and wipes fit perfectly in a couple of Target Dollar Spot bins on top of the drawers.

The curtain are super simple and not especially cute, but they get the job done. The job being block out the sunlight so Nash sleeps as long as possible. I got blackout fabric, cut it to size, didn't hem it, and added some grommets along the top so that we could use it with the curtain wire hanging thing we already had in there. So far so good!

All of Nash's nursery art found a home back on the wall with the door, along with his cute reading cushion made by his Aunt McCayla.

We started working on this room in January, and had it mostly done by mid-February, so he had a month of fun playing in there, while still sleeping in the other room in his crib. We officially switched him over Easter weekend, and other than a nap time or two that took him a while to settle in and go to sleep, it has been such a smooth transition. He even stays in bed until we go in and get him! I had visions of him waking up at 4 am and thinking it was morning and getting up and playing, but so far, so good. Phew! One less thing to worry about now. :)

WHERE WE GOT STUFF (Mostly Ikea)
Duvet cover (only available in twin): Ikea Ljudlig
Shelves: Ikea Kallax
Bins (orange no longer available): Ikea Drona
Gray drawers: Ikea Helmer
Play rug: Ikea Lillabo
Corner curtain system: Ikea Dignitet
Blackout fabric: Roc-Lon Blackout Drapery from JoAnn

Nash: 2 Years Old

2015-03-31T13:22:00.000-07:00

Well, as of a couple of weeks ago, we have a two year old! It's amazing how much Nash has changed in the last six months or so. He went from baby to little boy, and we love it. Bibs are gone, and high chair has given way to booster seat. He is moving out of his crib later this week. (Wish us luck!)

He is running everywhere, and loves going down the tallest slides at the park. He still hates swinging though. We just got him a balance bike, and he hopped right on. He still doesn't get the whole "sit on the seat" thing, but oh well.

He loves vehicles and trucks of any kind, and makes sure to point out every car we see anytime we go anywhere. He can identify a crazy amount of vehicles by name. Garbage truck, dump truck, fire truck, ex-avator (excavator), tractor, crane, police car, airplane, boat, bozer (bulldozer), and I'm sure there are more I'm forgetting. He also knows the parts of a lot of trucks too, probably because those are some of his favorite things to read about. He love to point out the driver's seat and the "steery wheel" every time we get in my car.

He is (most of the time) really sweet and fun to be around. He loves picking out new books at the library. Then we go home and read them all. We sit on the little couch in his room, and usually he says "snuggle", which means I get to put my arm around him while we read.

The best part of Nash's day is without a doubt when Mike gets home from work. This has a little to do with the fact that he loves playing in Mike's car and getting the mail with Daddy, but mostly he just loves being around his dad. It's super cute. Now when Mike does yard work, Nash is right there with him. He isn't helpful at all, but he loves being outside and he loves being with his dad, so it's a win win.

We had a little party the weekend before his birthday where we celebrated my brother's birthday too. We had pizza and cake. and Nash had fun playing with his cousins Olive and Miles.

On his actual birthday we went to the park when Mike home, and I made his favorite meal (pasta and cheesy bread). We had cake and ice cream after dinner, and put candles in his to blow out. Unfortunately, all he has heard about fire thus far is "Fire is hot! Don't touch!" so he was terrified of the candle. Maybe next year...

I'll end with some two year old pictures of our sweet boy. We love him so much, and are excited for what the coming year has in store.

Brown Butter Shortbread Thumbprints with Salted Caramel

2015-02-19T13:17:00.003-08:00

I don't know if it's a boy/girl thing or if it's just a funny coincidence, but when I was pregnant with Nash, I wanted red meat and salty foods. It was only the last month or so that sweets sounded good again. This time the pregnancy sweet tooth hit a lot earlier. Yikes!

I have been making a batch of cookies every week and eating way too many. Last week I tried something other than my go to chocolate chip or snickerdoodle, and oh my. They were delicious.

Brown Butter Shortbread Thumbprints with Salted Caramel

COOKIES:
3/4 cup butter, browned and cooled (just cook butter, stirring constantly until it turns brown)
1/2 cup brown sugar
2 eggs
1 tsp vanilla
1 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1 1/2 cups flour

CARAMEL:
1 cup sugar
1/3 cup milk or half and half
2 tbl butter
1/2 tsp sea salt (plus more for garnish)

TO MAKE THE COOKIES:
1. Mix the butter, sugar, eggs, and vanilla until creamy.
2. Add the dry ingredients, and mix together until well combined.
3. Chill in refrigerator for at least 30 minutes.
4. Roll into 1.5 inch balls, then press onto a parchment lined cookie sheet. Use your thumb or whatever to make a little well in the center of each cookie.
5. Bake at 375º F for 8-10 minutes, or until the edges just begin to turn golden. Cool on the cookie sheet.

FOR THE CARAMEL:
1. Put the sugar in a saucepan and cook over medium heat. DO NOT STIR! Once the sugar has completely melted, you will start to see spots where it starts to caramelize. At this point you can gently stir or swirl the sugar in the pan so that it caramelizes evenly.
2. Once the sugar is a nice golden brown, quickly whisk in the milk. If clumps of caramel form, don't panic, just keep whisking over low heat until it's smooth. Add the butter and salt, and pour into a jar or bowl to cool.
3. Once the cookies have cooled, fill up the "thumbprints" with the caramel sauce and sprinkle a bit of sea salt over the top if you want to.

Mayby: 25 Weeks

2015-02-05T13:01:00.001-08:00

Hello, I'm here with a little pregnancy update on baby But number two.

How far along: 25 weeks tomorrow! My 24 week appointment was today though. They got a bit off over the holidays. Everything is looking good so far!

How I'm feeling: Definitely better than a few months ago! I still don't feel amazing though. I feel like I have a certain amount of energy to expend each day, and when I use it all up, nausea hits. That amount of energy is very small to begin with, so I just have to be careful not to do too much and to take it as easy as I can while keeping an almost two year old entertained all day. I also have been getting this ridiculous hip pain that gets so bad I almost can't put weight on my left leg. Annoying.

Weight gain: So far my weight gain has tracked almost exactly with my first pregnancy, although I lost fewer pounds during the first trimester this time. Actual numbers aren't important; I weigh less than my husband, that's all that matters. :) (Side note: why do people think it's ok to ask pregnant people how much weight they have gained? If you wouldn't ask a non-pregnant person that question, don't ask a pregnant person that question.)

Maternity clothes: I have definitely been wearing my maternity jeggings. (Thanks, Old Navy.) I wear those with stretchy shirts from pre-pregnancy. But honestly, I mostly just wear tunics and leggings. I don't love maternity shirts because I just feel really dumpy, so I just go for stretchy most of the time.

Baby is a... GIRL!

I did the Verifi test at 10 weeks, so we've know since around 11 weeks that it was a girl. However, I still sort of didn't believe it until the ultrasound a month ago. We have a boy, Mike's twin brother has had two boys, so I thought we would have another boy. Nope! I can honestly say I had no preference, but it sure will be fun to have a little girl!

Baby size: I don't know. Cauliflower, eggplant? What do those even mean? At our anatomy scan four weeks ago, she was measuring 50th percentile. After a baby who in utero was over the 90th percentile with an off the charts head (still is), 50th sounds great to me!

Sleep: My sleep has been a little wacky the last month because Nash had an ear infection, and now he is getting his 2 year molars. We have had a few rough nights, and if I don't get a good night sleep, I feel awful the next day. This week has been good though, so that has been awesome!

Movement: Another crazy little mover in there. She doesn't kick as hard as Nash did, thankfully.

Name: We are pretty set on a name, but it's a secret. It was on our girl's list from when I was pregnant with Nash and we love it. Middle name is still up in the air, but I have my mom doing some digging through the family tree for more possibilities. Mayby is her code name for now. May baby = Mayby.

Christmas 2014

2015-02-02T13:39:00.000-08:00

You know, it's February, so I should probably get something down about Christmas. Maybe.

Christmas started on December 20th for us when we got together with Mike's brother, his wife, and their son Miles to celebrate Butler family Christmas. (The rest of the extended Butler family was celebrating on the other side of the state.) We opened blocks from Mike's parents, which were and continue to be a HUGE hit! We also had brunch and made Nash and Miles wear matching pajamas, obviously. Later that day we decorated Christmas cookies and went to a party at Mike's uncles house, where we spent time with some of his aunts, uncles, and cousins.

The 24th was our immediate family Christmas. It was exciting to celebrate as a family since Nash us old enough to know what's going on this year. We gave Nash a train board, which he promptly destroyed, so the tracks are just all over the place now. :) We went to church in the afternoon, then came home and FaceTimed with Mike's parents so they could see Nash play with all of his presents. We also had italian food for dinner, which we thought could be a fun family tradition in years to come.

Christmas Day was a crazy travel day for us, and we headed to Colorado to see my family. We flew with my brother, his wife, and their daughter which was fun, and we landed in a snowstorm, which was not fun. On top of that, the one car that my parents have that would fit two car seats, four adults, all the luggage, and a driver wouldn't start, so they had to borrow a car. By the time we got home, it was almost time to put the kids to bed. And we had left our house in Seattle mid-morning! It was a long day for a 2.5 hour flight. It was really fun though because my grandparents were at the house when we got there, and I hadn't seen them for almost three years! And the 25th is my grandma's birthday, so it was very special to be able to spend time with them.

We had Christmas with my family a few days later, which was a blast. There was cheese fondue, chocolate fondue, and lots of trains for Nash. He was in heaven, and he loved being able to spend so much time with his cousin, Olive. My morning sickness wasn't cooperating for much of the week, so I went to bed early a lot and was sick for quite a few of the days. Thankfully there were lots of people around to help with Nash so Mike was able to get a break too.

We had a fun few fun outings on days I didn't feel to sick, and we were able to spend time with a couple of friends, but we wish we'd been able to see more! Mike and I also snuck away to see a movie, which almost never happens these days. It was at a theater with huge recliner seats and food and drink service. So fun!

New Year's (which also happens to be my mom's birthday), we got another snowstorm, so we just hung out and ate Chick-Fil-A, and watched tv all day. It was magical.

With all the snow we got, Nash was able to go sledding for the first time! He loved the snow and loved sledding. He is a Colorado kid at heart. :)

Fall Wrap Up

2014-12-12T13:31:00.002-08:00

Well, our fall is going out with a bang. And by bang, I mean being totally exhausted. Last week Nash had a stomach bug. You can guess how that went with me being thisclose to throwing up at any given moment. After a day respite, Nash then got a horrible cold and cough, which I proceeded to catch. Let's just say coughing fits aren't doing my morning sickness any favors. Thank God Mike is still healthy, or we would be in big trouble! Although, I don't think anyone in our house has had a full night sleep for the last two weeks. Oh well.

Here are the things we did this fall that I don't want to forget! Starting with Labor Day weekend. We rented a big ole cabin with 5 other families for three nights and had a blast! It was right on a river near Leavenworth, WA. This was the trip that we found out that 17.5 month old Nash was too long for his Pack-N-Play, and he basically didn't sleep the entire trip. Since then we have been officially homebound until we move him into a normal bed, which honestly we are not ready to do. So it means no more trips for a while, but that's ok. Thankfully my parents in Denver have a crib, so we'll be covered when we go there for Christmas.

This was a walk we took at 6:00 am because Nash had been up since 5am. :)

My parents flew up the next weekend because Nash and Olive (my brother's daughter) were dedicated to the Lord at church. It was very special!

About a week after that, we found out about baby number two! And the same day, we went to the zoo! Nash was indifferent. Afterwards, we met up with my brother and his wife to tell them our news. It's our baby tradition. We tell them like 2 hours after we take the test. :)

The next weekend (we had a busy September), I jetted off to San Clemente, CA, for my annual girl's weekend with friends from college. Miraculously my morning sickness had not kicked in yet. (At the time, I thought maybe I wouldn't really be sick this pregnancy. HAHAHAHAHA!) Anyway, it was a great long weekend filled with lots of food, whale watching, sitting on the beach, and laughing. A lot.

When I got back from California, I babysat my niece Olive. Nash took that literally.

And the next day all hell broke loose and morning sickness hit with a vengeance! I'm super glad it waited until after my trip though.

October had a few ok moments, but mostly involved me laying in bed trying not to be sick. We did make it to the pumpkin patch with Mike's brother's family, which was really fun! For some reason I can't find any of those pictures!

Then Nash trick-or-treated for the first time! Night time is my super sick time, so I was spent after the first three houses, but it started raining right then, so we just called it a night. Sorry, Nash.

He was a cowboy. Obviously.

November was more of me laying around. Exciting stuff. Thanksgiving was spent with a bunch of good friends, and it actually was so nice not to host this year. I magically was able to eat that day, too. Thanks, Thanksgiving.

And that pretty much gets us to today. December has been all sickness all the time, but hopefully it will all be out of our systems by Christmas so we can be healthy and enjoy it. We have like 5 Christmases to celebrate, so we need to get our game faces on. I can't wait!

Baby But #2

2014-12-01T14:23:00.003-08:00

Well, if we are Facebook or Instagram friends then you already know our news. Baby Butler number two is coming in May! We are so excited and thankful that Nash is going to have a little sibling.

So far this pregnancy has been the same, but different. Last time I was nauseous right at 4 weeks, the worst was 5-7, and then I steadily felt better from there. I was sick off and on into the the 3rd trimester though.

This time, I didn't feel sick until around six weeks, which was great because we found I was pregnant out about a week and half before I was supposed to leave for my annual girl's trip with my besties from college. Thankfully I felt pretty good the whole weekend and could eat normally! Then I got home and it got bad. Like really bad, really fast. Like lose eight pounds in two weeks bad, and it stayed bad for quite while. I am 15.5 weeks now, and the last two weeks have slowly been getting better. Dinnertime is still hit or miss, but I've been able to eat it for most of the last week.

Poor Mike has been run ragged, but he has not complained even once. Since afternoons/evenings are my super sick time, he has been on his own with Nash when he gets home from work. He's also had to make dinner for both of them, clean up, go grocery shopping, etc. Super-dad! Thankfully we have had friends bring meals, and my mom visited for 10 days to get us through the worst and give us a break.

I think the most surprising thing about this pregnancy has been how much less stressed I am. Probably because the unknown of becoming a parent isn't looming. I thought that with everything that happened with our nephews and with other friends recently would make me terrified to the max this time, but I'm honestly not. I think that watching my sister-in-law's second pregnancy taught me a lot about being brave in the name of love, and it taught me to enjoy and love this child for whatever time we have.

So that's what we are doing. Enjoying this time as a family of 3.5 as much as my nausea will allow! And taking it really easy. :)

For All the New Moms... And the People That Love Them

2014-08-29T10:54:00.000-07:00

I hung out with my sister-in-law yesterday morning. She has a cute little 9 week old. He cried some (as 9 week olds tend to do), he ate, he spit up, and he slept some too. He doesn't sleep through the night (which is also the norm for a 9 week old).

We were talking about how when you are the one with the fussy baby or the baby who wakes up every two hours all night or the one who fusses when he eats (the list goes on) it seems like everyone else's baby is perfect.

Probably because we see photos like this...

But what people don't realize, is that for every moment of calm, there are 100 moments like this...

Oh, the screaming. Not to mention the sleep deprivation, poop, pee, spit up, and the night screaming. Night screaming gets its own distinction because everything feels about a million times more stressful at 2 am as opposed to 2 pm. It's just the way it is.

But it's not just people putting on a face for social media. To an extent we see what we want to see, and also, if someone posted about their crying baby every time they cried, it would be ridiculous. They would post every five seconds. So they share the cute smiling pics because (for those of us who don't have perfect babies) those moments are more rare the first few months, and that's what you want to remember anyway.

Really there is nothing that prepares you for how hard it is taking care of a newborn. No matter how much you want it, how much time you've spent with babies, how many books you read, how long you've tried: taking care of your own child is a whole different ballgame.

So I've been thinking about babies all day, and my sis and I talked about a lot of this stuff. I wanted to write it down for all those new mamas. And really these are just the things I wish I could go back in time and say to myself.

1. You don't know anything.

That's the bad news. The good news is, neither does anyone else! Not Babywise, not Dr. Sears, not your best friend, not that bitch at the grocery store who tried to tell you that your baby should really be wearing socks. Nobody knows, because if they did, there would only be one book, and everyone would follow it, and everyone's baby would be on the same schedule, and life would would be perfect. But every baby is different, and what works for one won't work for another. But you will figure it out eventually. Maybe. Hopefully.

2. All the things you are stressed out about will work themselves out eventually. I promise.

That is the number one thing I wish I could go back and tell myself! When Nash would only nap in a carrier, I was convinced it was a bad habit he would never break. When we finally got him to nap in his crib, we still had to rock him to sleep until he was 5 months old. Well, guess what, after 5 months, we could lay him down awake, and he puts himself to sleep. He was ready. It's not like there are 15 year olds out there whose moms still rock them to sleep every night! (I hope.) The crappy phases will end, and a year from now, it will seem like the blink of an eye. I know that doesn't fix anything now, but I promise, it gets better.

3. Please keep posting cute pictures.

People will find out eventually when they have their own kid how much it sucks, right? Just kidding! But seriously, I think it helps morale so much to have other people say "What a beautiful baby!" or "Wow, out and about and looking great with a one month old! Super mom!!!" They don't need to know that it's the first time in a month that both you and the baby are wearing non-pajamas at the same time. They also don't need to know that your pants were covered in spit up, that's why the picture is from the waist up. Anyone with kids knows what a big deal it is just to get out of the house, so if you get a moment of feeling like super mom from posting a cute family pic from the park (from the 30 seconds that the baby wasn't screaming), then I think that's a good thing.

4. On the flip side, don't be afraid to get real.

I love how much awareness people have now about loss and infertility. Seriously. However, I think it makes people feel like they can't complain AT ALL lest they hurt someone who is dealing with one of those things. I know I definitely felt that way after the loss of our nephew. Who was I to complain, when my baby was here and healthy?! Unfortunately, being aware how lucky you are (and I promise, I know) doesn't make the actual day to day care of a newborn any easier, so the guilt hits you like a ton of bricks. It's ok if you don't love being a mother all day every day. It doesn't mean that you don't deserve to be a mom; most moms feel that way. You don't need to shout to the world how tired and frustrated you are (but if that helps, go for it), but I hope you have some people in your life that you can be real with. It makes it so much easier and makes it feel less lonely.

5. You're doing a great job!

I promise. Nobody is judging you when your baby won't take naps. It is not a reflection on your parenting every time your baby cries. You are doing great! Babies cry and that's ok! Also, your baby loves you. I was really convinced for a good 5 months that my baby hated me, but it turns out he doesn't. When he falls down, he wants a hug from me. When I pick him up from Sunday school, he sees me and runs straight over. You'll get there with your baby, too. :)

And to the people with a new mama in their life/neighborhood/family:

1. We don't need your advice... unless we ask for it.

Maybe you raised 6 kids, maybe you run a daycare or a preschool, maybe you read a book, but guess what. Kids are different! Sometimes I just need to vent and hear someone say, "That sucks, but it will get better." We have Google, books, forums, and blogs to give us all kinds of information (usually conflicting). If you try to solve our problem by saying, "Have you tried this?" we have probably already tried it. Just be there for us. If we say, "Did your kid ever struggle with napping? What did you do?" of course share what you know! It's awesome to have a support system of people who have been there that we can go to for advice! But only if we ask.

2. PLEASE don't tell us about other people's babies.

I don't want to know about how your neighbor's daughter slept 10 hours straight at 4 days old. I don't need to know that your cousin made so much milk she could have fed three babies. Save those stories for six months from now when I am less of a crazy tired hormonal zombie, ok? When you ask how my baby is sleeping, and I say "He gets up every three hours", and you tell us how your brother/daughter/grandson slept through the night at one week old, we hear, "You are doing this wrong. If you were a good mom, your baby would be sleeping through the night like this other baby." I know you didn't mean it that way at all, but we are trying so hard just to get through the day (and night). Don't compare, just say, "That's great!" or "That's exactly what he should be doing at that age!" Ok?

3. Thanks for being there.

Thanks for meals and laundry. For mowing the lawn and buying us coffee after a long night. Thanks for calling before you come over. Thanks for not staying too late so that my husband and I can have some precious alone time after we put the baby down for the night. Thanks for coming to our house so that we don't have to get a sitter. Thank you for inviting us to things even though you know we can't go, so we feel like we haven't lost all of who we were before we had kids. And thanks for being there. We couldn't do it alone!

All photos are by the amazing Carly Bish!

Things I am Obsessed With: Summer 2014 Edition

2014-08-26T13:32:00.002-07:00

So, I am officially over summer. No offense summer lovers, but I am fair skinned (so I can't be in the sun for long periods of time) with a 17 month old (so he can't be in the sun for a long time either). Our house doesn't have air conditioning (nobody in the PNW does), and we are going on 4 months of temps in the 80s. Over. It.

I am ready for fall. I want sweaters and boots and pumpkin spice everything.

Here are a few things that made me hate summer a little less.

Trader Joe's Cookie Butter Ice Cream: No explanation necessary.

Old Navy Linen Drawstring Shorts: I got these in 2 colors for $10 each during a sale a few months ago. Are they "mom shorts" yes. But I am a 31 year old mom, and these are long without being bermuda length, and the drawstring allows some disguise of my muffin top. So whatever. Lame mom shorts.

ELF Jumbo Lip Gloss Sticks: I am not really a lipstick person, but I guess part of being in your 30's is wanting a little color on your lips. Or maybe it's just being tired. I started with the nude color, and have now amassed the berry and the red. They are sheer and creamy without being sticky. I really really like these. I also like them for traveling because they don't explode if you open them on a plane, and they can double as a cream blush or eyeshadow in a pinch. Ok, maybe not the red one for eyeshadow, but you get the idea.

H & M little boy tank tops: Great for little boys who tend to run hot like mine. We have gotten so lucky with hand me downs, that I have only bought clothes for Nash a handful of times. When I do, H & M is the place I like to get them. No stupid character clothes or shirts with dumb sayings on them (for the most part). The cotton is so soft, the clothes are great quality, and they are actually less expensive than Old Navy and Target if you hit a sale. And they look so cute!

Homemade alcoholic slushies: You know, because of the whole "no a/c thing", and the whole "deal with a hot screaming toddler all day" thing. (Why does being hot make everyone so crabby?) Please, if you have an ice cream maker, do this right now. Ours didn't even 100% freeze because it was 85 DEGREES IN OUR HOUSE. It was still amazing.

Does anyone else have a summer obsession? What am I missing out on? There's always next year...

1 Suitcase • 3 People • 11 Days

2014-08-13T14:06:00.001-07:00

I've mentioned before how I love to make packing lists, and how said packing lists are very different now that we have a kid. Over the last few trips, I have finally figured out how not to overpack, and for our last two flying trips, we have brought only one suitcase, a carry on size. Before we left for Colorado last month, I took pictures of exactly what I packed so that I could remember for future reference. And since I LOVE reading about what other people pack, I thought I would share it here. (I actually do love reading about it, I wasn't being sarcastic. See some of my all time favorite packing posts here, here, and here.)

A few caveats:

• We did laundry once, which meant we didn't have to pack as much as we would have had to if we hadn't had access to laundry.

• We have a child who requires a car seat, and carseats check for free. If you use a zippered car seat bag, there is room in there with the seat to shove a package of diapers or a packing cube or both. We have never had a problem doing this, and we always put baby stuff in there. We also always have extra space in our backpacks that we could shove those into if someone got weird about it.

What you see in this picture is everything we brought! The orange packing cube peeking out of my duffel is the "diaper bag" and has diapers and wipes. Since Nash is out of the baby phase, we just needed that and some snacks. And I have a medium sized purse that easily fits in the duffel too.

Our gear:

(Basically everything but the backpack was gifted to us by my parents over various holidays. Thanks, Mom and Dad!)

• Lots and lots of packing cubes of various sizes. Most of them are medium and large E-Bags.

• Tumi expandable carry on

• Vera Bradley Grand Traveler (the color I have isn't available anymore)

• REI Daypack (similar one here)

• Babies R Us Car Seat Bag (This one has fit both our infant car seat and the convertible one that he is in now, just not at the same time.)

And now, what we brought. The pics are self-explanatory... Because I put words on them.

So there you have it. One suitcase for the entire little family. We aren't packing experts, but we're getting better!

How I Fed My Baby

2014-08-06T14:09:00.003-07:00

um, this is about breastfeeding. so don't read this if you don't want to read about that. ok? I don't even say the word nipple though, so it's not that bad. except for just then. that's the only time, I swear...

Have you noticed that it's world breastfeeding week? I have seen no fewer that twenty posts about it over the last few days. Often people accompany their breastfeeding pictures with sentiments like, "The best feeling in the world!" or "It was such hard work, but so glad we stuck with it!" or "Giving my baby the food she was meant to eat!" I'm totally not bashing these women, that's great! It's the way nature intended, but it just didn't work for me.

This is a story I've been wanting to share for a while, and I guess seeing all these pictures of people breastfeeding made me actually do it. Because it is hard, and sometimes no matter how you work at it, it just doesn't happen. So in honor of world breastfeeding week, I thought I would share my breastfeeding journey, or lack there of. If you have had a similar journey, I hope you know that you aren't alone.

This picture is from the day Nash was born. The first time he ever ate. (Can you tell I had just been in labor for 100 years?)

That first day he was super tired, but his nursing was ok. The second day it was totally fine, and we were discharged. He was a champion little eater. It still totally hurt, but it does for everyone at first. When Nash was three days old, we had a mandatory appointment with a lactation nurse. They do this thing where they weigh the baby before and after they eat, and he got about an ounce and a half of milk during the 30 minute feeding. My milk had come in and I hadn't even realized it! I didn't even leak! (That was red flag number one.) Apparently 1.5 ounces for a few day old baby was just fine, and at his 10 day pediatrician appointment, he was back to his birthweight.

The first two weeks were great. He seemed to be really awake during the day compared to other newborns, but he ate well all day long, so he slept well at night. After the first week, he would usually sleep a 5-6 hour stretch followed by a 3-4 hour stretch.

It was right around the 2-3 week mark that things started getting crazy. He had a growth spurt and ate literally every 60-90 minutes for a couple of days. After that, eating time was fussy time. (That was red flag number two.) He would pull away and scream after eating for a minute, so we would switch sides, he would eat for another minute, scream, and on and on. Naps became non-existent, and after his night feeding, it would take 60-90 minutes of him screaming, and me or Mike rocking to get him back to sleep.

This was basically what my entire day was like for the next two months. Just screaming.

The only naps that were taken were in a carrier. And we couldn't sit down. He had to be in the carrier and moving.

Since he wouldn't nap and he fussed when eating, we thought maybe he had reflux. We tried medication for a few weeks, but there was no difference.

My mom came to visit when he was 8 weeks old, and she sort of suspected that he just wasn't getting enough milk. One night (after cluster feeding and bedtime feeding) Nash wouldn't settle down, so we decided to try giving him a bottle of formula just to see. He ate 5 ounces, which is a TON, especially since he had finished all of his feedings for the day so he should theoretically be full. For some reason I still didn't really believe he was starving, so I figured I would see what his weight was at his 2 month check-up a few days later, and we kept giving him a little bottle of formula at bedtime just in case.

The confirmation came when Nash's weight had dropped from the 75th percentile at birth to the 25th percentile at two months. I was convinced.

I went to the lactation center at the hospital the next day. A baby of his weight should have been getting 4 oz a feeding. They did the weighing thing before and after a feeding, and he was only getting ONE OUNCE! Yikes. That was a real punch in the gut. The nurse I met with that day was kind of militant, and she said that in addition to Nash sleeping so well at night, giving him a bottle the last 4 days made my supply drop. Ok... She prescribed a strict regimen that would get my supply up, all I had to do was put forth some effort. She also wanted me to talk to my OB about prescribing me a heart medication, because in some people this heart medicine has a weird milk increasing side effect. When she said that most OBs won't prescribe it (you know, since it's a HEART medication), I was like, "Um, nope." But I had the rest of her regimen in hand. The next 3 weeks were a nightmare.

I had to nurse like normal (which basically was a lot of fussing and screaming because there wasn't enough), then offer a bottle of formula so that he would get full. Then I had to pump to try to increase my milk supply. THEN, since Nash was eating every 2 hours, I would get a 20-30 minute break (during which I would try to get Nash to take a nap in the carrier) and start all over again. I would also have to pump after he went to bed, but before I went to bed, and I would have to wake up every few hours to pump in the middle of the night even though my baby slept all night long. Pumping took 20 minutes a side and the most I ever got was 3 ounces. Most of the time I got 1 ounce, even those middle of the night pumpings.

I was also taking fenugreek, a separate herb elixer, eating one million calories and countless grams of protein, drinking tons of water, and crying a lot. Haha! It was exhausting! Did I mention this just happened to coincide with my husband's final month of grad school, so I was basically doing all of this on my own? (Not that he isn't super helpful, he is! He just had a LOT going on that month that had to get done so he could graduate.)

After 3 weeks of this craziness we went back to the lactation center to see how much my supply had increased. Instead of 1 ounce per feeding, he got 1.4 ounces! Yeah, we still weren't even close. The nurse I met with this time was SO MUCH nicer, and she said to me, "What do you want? Is breastfeeding your baby the most important thing to you or is it a happy baby?" She knew that my body just wasn't doing what my baby needed it to do, and she made me realize that a happy, full baby is more important than how he gets fed. She was releasing me from feeling any guilt, because she could see that what we had been doing the last few weeks wasn't sustainable, and it also wasn't increasing my supply, so what was the point? I basically love that nurse.

So we began formula feeding and never looked back. I would still nurse before giving him the bottle, but within a month he had stopped all together. And guess what? I don't feel bad about it. Not even a little. I'm not sad breastfeeding didn't work, because a bottle worked so well. He was happy, I was happy. It was a win win. Also, this study just came out. Of course breast milk has so many great immune boosters, but long term, there is no difference between breast fed and bottle fed kids.

The point is, however you feed your kid, great job. You're feeding them, that's all that matters.

And just for fun, check out Nash a day or two before we found out he was starving. His arms were SO skinny and his face was gaunt.

And one month later, a few weeks into formula feeding. So much better!

Colorado 2014: Vacation by Cities

2014-07-30T10:43:00.001-07:00

We got back last week from spending eleven fantastic days in Colorado with family and friends! We were so grateful for so much time there, and it was a great mix of relaxing days and seeing people and places all over. Here are some of the things we did, not necessarily in chronological order.

Centennial
• Lots of time on my parent's deck, watching storms come in over the mountains.

• Naps with dogs.

• Nash got to catch up with some of his little lady friends (and us with their parents).

This was them in Colorado last July, and now this July. Time flies.

His fun little friend who is just 2 weeks older than him.

• Noodles & Co. (twice), Sonic, Chick-Fil-A (three times), and Dunkin Donuts.

• Alcoholic otter pops made by my mom, along with lots of her other excellent cooking.

• Fire pits and s'mores and sunsets.

• Lots of great time with my family.

Boulder
• Breakfast at The Buff with my sister and my good friend Tory. With a view of the flatirons, no less!

• Tried some fun beers at Avery Brewing Company.

Louisville
• Went to service at Ascent Community Church, co-led by my college ministry pastor and the youth pastor that I did middle school ministry with while I was in college.
• Dinner with the Colorado fun friends and families!

Fort Collins
• We got to meet this sweet little boy, the son of my good friend Taylor!

Future best buds.

• Lunch at La Luz. The potato burrito was amazing!
• Then we sampled a few beers at Odell...

Morrison
• Mike and I (and Kaela!) saw The Avett Brothers (and rainbows) at Red Rocks! It was such an amazing show at the best venue in the world.

Breckenridge
• Got to taste some Breckenridge bourbon.
• Ate lunch at an old favorite, Kenosha Steakhouse.

Fairplay
• Spent the night at my family's cabin. Unfortunately the altitude did not agree with Nash, so I had to drive him back down to Denver at 4 am. Womp womp.

• At least Mike, my dad, and my sister got to stop at another old favorite when they drove back at a much more reasonable hour.

Denver
• Toured (and tasted) Stranahan's with friends.

• Dinner and margaritas at the Rio. Duh.
• A quick beer at Our Mutual Friend. I got to try a Brett beer. Finally!
• Went to a really fun lecture series put on by The Denver Museum of Contemporary Art called Mixed Taste. We saw Soul Food and Salvador Dali, and it was really fun, especially because the Soul Food speaker brought samples. :)

Whenever we weren't out and about, we were probably parked on my parents couch watching movies. It was magical. Special thanks to all of the friends who took time off of work, spent time driving, etc to hang out with us. And a VERY special thanks to my parents for hosting us, and to them and my sister for being so fun and for babysitting. :)

June Recap

2014-06-27T11:06:00.000-07:00

Ok, I know June isn't over yet. Small detail.

Also, I'm going to start with May 31st. Our friends Chad and Ashley got married in downtown Seattle! It was such a beautiful wedding, and it was extra fun because several of our good friends from Colorado flew in for it since Ashley is a Colorado girl too.

my hot date and me

Mike left directly from the wedding to go to a conference in Montreal. He took a cab to the airport and caught a red eye. LOOOONG night for him. I got to spend the next few days hanging out with friends who were still in town enjoying the amazing weather.

a little doof at Gasworks Park

Nash and I had dinner at the beach one night. I do love living in the Pacific Northwest.

Next up: the Butler birthday extravaganza.

June 5: Noah's 1st birthday (If you haven't heard Noah's story, visit his mama's blog.)
It was a sad day, but it was also really neat to see how many lives he has changed in one short year. We decorated his special place with balloons and we wore rainbows and we missed him very much.

Over that weekend, we were able to get together with Mike's family to celebrate all of the family June birthdays. Noah on the 5th, me on the 10th, and Mike and his brother John on the 11th. We had BBQ at a park and the boys threw the football around for a while.

Big Butler birthday party at the park

pre-birthday party with some local craft beers while Mike's parents babysat

June 10: My 31st birthday (I can't say thirty and flirty and thriving anymore.)
My mom and sister flew in that morning for a visit! We just ordered pizza, my brother and his wife and baby came over, and we all hung out. That's basically what I always do for my birthday.

June 11: Mike's 33rd birthday! (and John too!)
We went out while my mom and sister babysat! We had margaritas, way too much Mexican food, and ended the night at our favorite neighborhood pub.

June 11th was also the due date of Noah's baby brother, but it came and went with no baby. Then on Sunday, June 15th (which just so happens to have been Father's Day!) we got the call!

Baby Miles was born that morning, and we got to meet him when he was just a few hours old!

I might have started weeping uncontrollably when I walked in, I pulled it together for this pic.
I have never cried such happy tears in my whole life!

We also came back a few hours later with Nash! I had never visited people in the hospital after having a baby before I had my own baby. When Nash was born our hospital was super strict about visitors checking in, and no kids were allowed unless it was a new baby's sibling. I just assumed that all hospitals were like that, so the day after Noah was born and we went to visit, we left Nash with my sister. When we got there, we walked right in and didn't have to sign in or anything. It makes me crazy to think about that we could have totally brought Nash with us that day, and it makes me so sad that Nash and Noah never got to meet. Needless to say, we were so excited for this to happen!

We are so so so grateful that he is here and he is healthy! We visited Miles (and his mom and dad) at home a few days later, and oh my goodness. I can't explain how much joy we had seeing them with their baby boy AT HOME! Not that any of the pain from last year has gone away at all, but oh man, Mr. Miles has brought an incredible amount of joy into the world with him. Love that little dude.

Due to the arrival of baby Miles and my family being in town at the same time, Nash got lots of grandparent time this month!

eating ice cream with Papa (Mike's dad)

eating doughnuts with my mom (I promise we feed him food other than sweets)

lots of family in town to celebrate my grandmother's 75th birthday

Nash is now a 27 pound 34 inch tall 15 month old. He wears 2T and never stops moving. He has been fussy lately due to getting in 4 molars at once, but the last few days he has been more back to normal, whatever normal is for a toddler. He just figured out how to climb onto furniture, and now he does it all day long. Sometimes he climbs up, and lays back like he's going to watch a movie or something. But that only lasts for about 15 seconds before he climbs down and does it all over again.

We also recently acquired a bike trailer for free! Thanks, Buy Nothing Bothell! Nash loves it, even though he has to wear a helmet. (Go here to see if there is a Buy Nothing group in your area. It's such an awesome community.)

We also made a summer fun to do list. Our bike trailer helped us cross the first item off of the list: bike ride! We are excited to cross off more!

pardon my 6 year old handwriting :)

Baby-proof Your Entire House for $14

2014-05-08T15:06:00.000-07:00

If there is one word to best describe me it would be lazy. That's why when I bought those plastic latches to baby-proof our cabinets, and they were super difficult to line up and install correctly, I gave up after installing zero of them.

Whoops.

But I love my son, and I don't want him to eat Lysol, or soap, or trash. Actually, I just really don't want to put everything away that he would pull out from the cabinets. I should also add that the way our house is set up (tri-level) it is very easy to keep Nash contained and supervised. Even if I am on a different floor, it's so open that I can almost always see him. Baby proofing is not a replacement for supervision, it just buys you some time. :)

Cheap Baby Proofing Idea #1:
Rubber Bands - free

Just loop them tightly around your cabinet pulls. Whatever you do, don't try the latches like this one. We did. Not only was it baby-proof, it was also adult proof. Like I seriously couldn't get it off of our bathroom cabinets. I was a little bit freaking out thinking we would need to unscrew the knobs, but then I FINALLY got it off. Then I returned them.

Cheap Baby Proofing Idea #2
Fabric Baby Gate - $6.00

Our lowest level is our tv room, and it's also where all of the toys are. We needed a gate to block off the bottom of that staircase to keep Nash down there.

The problem is, baby gates are ugly. No offense. Also, I have always had issues with opening/expanding/collapsing them in my babysitting/nannying/Sunday school teaching days. I always just ended up stepping over them.

But let's just say that childbirth doesn't do your tailbone any favors, especially when you push for 5 hours. AKA it still hurts a lot 14 months later, so stepping over a baby gate multiple times a day (especially with a 27 pound baby) wasn't going to work. I thought one of those retractable baby gates would be awesome, but it turns out those are more money than we wanted to spend.

I had a vague idea of a fabric gate of some kind. I googled my little heart out, but wasn't finding exactly what I wanted. I bought four of those sticky hooks and used some fabric and elastic I already had to make basically a giant rectangle with elastic loops at each corner. I used two pieces of fabric and sewed them together like a giant pillowcase, then just didn't put any stuffing inside.

It's super easy to unhook one of the top corners to walk through, or hook it off to the side.

So far so good! Nash could absolutely escape if he wanted to, but I think the fact that it is opaque fabric (as opposed to a mesh or lattice baby gate) means that he isn't very interested by what's on the other side, because he can't see over there. I mean, he knows the stairs are there, but since all of his toys are down there in that room, he is more interested in those.

Cheap Baby Proofing Idea #3
Entertainment Center Cover - $1.50

In the same room, we have a small shelf thing that holds our Tivo, Blu-Ray, and X-Box. All of the flashing lights are very tempting to a tiny little boy. So tempting that one day in the time it took me to change laundry loads 20 feet away from him, he turned on the X-Box, ejected the disk, and hung from the tray until it broke. It took Mike 90 minutes and some YouTube videos to fix it. He is a saint.

We thought about trying to add a door, but then we would need a latch too, and it would never really match. I decided to try a super lazy and cheap fix and see if it worked. $1.50 worth of black fabric later, and we were good to go.

I have some plastic snaps and the snap tool (I don't know what it's called) from my mom, so I doubled up my 1/2 yard of black cotton, and put a snap in each corner. Then I super glued the other half of the snaps to the inside of the little entertainment center. I didn't even hem the fabric. Because I'm lazy.

And it hides all of this junk!

Again, he can undo the snaps, but he knows he isn't supposed to, so for the most part, he doesn't go there. And not seeing all the little lights flashing at him makes it a lot less tempting.

Regular Baby Proofing Stuff That We Actually Paid For

Wall straps for our tall bookshelves - $4.00

Outlet covers - $2.50

And there it is. We kept it simple. No toilet locks (we just keep the lids down and close the bathroom door) and no doorknob covers, he can't reach them yet). Does anyone else have any baby-proofing tips to share?

April 2014

2014-04-25T14:50:00.003-07:00

What the heck have we been doing? You know, besides taking day trips to other countries...

• Mike's mom was here at the beginning of the month, and my mom is here right now. It's fun to see them interact with Nash since he is becoming more and more like a little person, and less like a baby. (Some moms get all weepy about that, but I love it. He's so cute and fun at this age! Except when he's throwing a fit.)

• Easter happened. The 12 month size suit that I bought when I was pregnant somehow magically fit! Ok, it was a bit short and a bit snug. Oh well. It still looked pretty cute!

• My baby nephew Miles will be here in less than two months, and I can't wait! Six of his mama's best friends and I are throwing a shower for them next month. I have been doing stuff for it since like February. I have literally spent hours planning and replanning the menu. It's a way for me to channel my excitement into something productive! Haha! But then when you multiply that excitement by 7, it's out of control! Miles is going to be one spoiled baby. Oh well. :)

• We're painting... again. Remember when we painted our entire house? Well, we never actually painted the pre-primed baseboards that we installed, so we're trying to get it done. While we're at it, we are painting all of the remaining wood doors and window trim in our living room and upstairs hallway. Our house is officially wood trim free!!!!!!!!!!! (Except for the master bathroom aka The Chokie aka WE WILL NEVER SPEAK OF IT AGAIN aka the room that I try to pretend doesn't exist.) Maybe someday I'll take pictures of it. Maybe. Everything is a hot mess right now, but Manny doesn't care.

• Mike and I have been trying to make healthier eating choices, which for us means eating smaller portions and only going to Taco Bell once a month. Easter candy and summer beers have been derailing me. Oh well.

• My friend texted some of us moms and asked for some outdoor toy ideas since it's summer. She lives in Colorado. It's 55 and raining in Seattle today. Thanks for rubbing it in.

• I bought coral boat shoes. I HAD to.

Mike's Surprise Day Trip

2014-04-11T09:20:00.001-07:00

I should start by saying that we have been watching Bates Motel. It's really good, and the cute little boy from Finding Neverland is grown up now and plays Norman Bates. I was curious where they filmed (the show is set in Oregon), and it turns out they film in and around Vancouver, BC, which just so happens to be a two hour drive from where we live. And then I happened upon this. They built a replica of the motel right over the border, and it's right on the side of the road!

So an idea began formulating: a little day trip. And because we almost never do anything super romantic or surprising for each other, I thought it would be fun to plan the day for Mike. I told him that I had a day trip planned, and we could go whenever.

Well whenever turned out to be Sunday. Mostly because I really wanted to go, and if I had to wait any longer, I would tell him where we were going.

So we hit the road, and we headed north. The direction was sort of a giveaway for our first stop. Mike went to college at Western Washington University in Bellingham, just before the Canadian border. He has only been back a handful of times, so I thought that would be a great place to stop for lunch.

We went to his favorite brewery, Boundary Bay. He had the saison, I had the scotch ale.

Nash had the ice water...

And it would have been silly to go to Boundary Bay and not walk the 3 blocks to Mallard Ice Cream. Mike had heath bar. I had coconut chocolate chip with almond and dark chocolate orange. Because I'm worth it.

#rainbowsfornoah

Then it was time for the main event. I dramatically pulled out our passports. Well, Mike's and my passports and Nash's birth certificate. He doesn't have a passport yet. :)

We passed through the border crossing, and literally 4 minutes later, driving down a road in the middle of nowhere, we see this!

See the little Hitchcock in window?

Since they aren't currently filming, everything is boarded up, but it was still neat to see!

Our next stop was Stanley Park! It's way over on the northwest corner of Vancouver, but we had never been before, and have always wanted to check it out. We didn't know much about it, just that people like it. It was HUGE! It was dense forest that opened up onto several gorgeous beaches. There are beaches in Seattle, but the sand isn't amazing. This beach was so clean, the sand was so nice, there were lots of pretty shells, and it wasn't crowded at all.

And some babies LOVED the sand!

Our next stop was Granville Island. We walked through the public market, which is sort of like an indoor farmers market with stalls and stalls of fruits and vegetables, pastries, and hot food.

We also hit up the Granville Brewery where we tasted six different beers including a honey lager and a maple cream ale. Yum!

Then we headed home. Of course we had to stop here for dinner on our way back...

It was really fun to get away for the day, and Nash is old enough now that he eats people food, naps less, and enjoys doing new things. Just going to the beach and seeing him enjoy the sand for the first time was really fun. Hopefully we'll do it again soon!

March Pizza of the Month: Breakfast

2014-04-08T11:07:00.002-07:00

I think people in the 90's felt a lot smarter than we do now. If you came up with a genius idea, you got to think that nobody had ever thought of it before.

Like, when I was a kid, I thought I invented this hairstyle.

What's that? It's just a person with their hair tucked behind their ears? I DIDN'T invent that? Don't worry, approximately one week after I "created" this genius hair do, a catalog arrived at our house. The woman on the cover had her hair just like this. Bubble burst.

But for one week, I thought I was pretty cool.

We wanted to make a breakfast pizza. I have had versions of this before: most involved cracking an egg onto a bacon and cheese pizza, and when it came out of the oven, the yolk was still nice and runny.

Problem: runny egg yolks are disgusting. #nooffense

So, I knew there would be scrambled eggs.

Then I had the GENIUS idea to use a waffle as the crust! I did it! I came up with a totally original, never been done before breakfast pizza! Yay me!!! I'm awesome!!!

I decided to Google it. Just to be sure. Just to revel in my creativity when I saw zero search results for "breakfast pizza on a waffle".

Womp womp. Bubble burst.

Oh well, it was still delicious!!!

Here it is, breakfast pizza... on a waffle.

Components:
- waffle: I used a mix and stirred in herbes de provence and shredded cheese before putting it in the waffle iron
- spicy maple butter: mix together a pat of butter with a splash of maple syrup* and a dash of cayenne
- two eggs, scrambled
- two strips of bacon, crumbled
- shredded cheese

We spread the maple butter on the hot waffle, topped it with the egg, cheese, and bacon, then put it under the broiler for a minute to melt the cheese. It was amazing!

*I am not a food snob. I will happily eat things like Costco hot dogs or Wendy's hamburgers and buy lots of generic brands, but I refuse to buy fake maple syrup. Real syrup all the way, baby.

Nash: One Year

2014-03-21T10:27:00.000-07:00

On Sunday, our baby turned one! In some ways, it has felt like the longest year ever, and in other ways, it has absolutely flown by.

We celebrated the day before with Aunts Hannah, McCayla, and Aaron; Uncles Mike, John, and Tom; and Nash's new baby cousin Olive. We had Mexican food (Nash loves a good burrito bowl) and banana cake. Unfortunately three teeth coming in at once and trying to do cake right before nap time made for a not super happy kid, but that's ok. :)

March 16, 2013
8lbs 11oz • 20 inches • likes sleeping and eating

March 16, 2014
26lbs 5oz • 32 inches • like his cars, knocking things over, opening cupboards

We are so grateful to have had the last year with him and look forward to the ones to come. We love this little boy!

A Quick Trip to San Francisco

2014-03-14T14:23:00.001-07:00

Family vacation success! We spent three nights in San Francisco because Mike had two days of sick time to burn before March 14th, and there were some great flight deals. So we booked a last minute trip, and we managed to hit (almost) everything on our to do list!

Mike was born in San Francisco, but moved away at 18 months old, and hadn't been since he was in middle school. I went once in high school and once in college. Needless to say, there were still a ton of things that hadn't done there. We were mostly excited to eat our way through the city! We also got super lucky with weather. The whole week before it predicted that it would be low 60s and cloudy while we were there. It ended up being 70 and sunny the entire time!

So here we go.

Saturday

12:30 pm: We landed and took the BART into the city where we checked into our hotel: Le Meridian. (Shout out to my dad for using points and suite upgrades to hook us up with an AMAZING room!)

2:00 pm: We walked a few blocks to the Ferry Building and had burgers and beers at Gott's outside in the sun with some friends. The Ferry Building ended up being one of our favorite places, and we were so glad it was so close!

3:30 pm: Back to the hotel so Nash could take a quick nap.

4:30 pm: We walked around, saw downtown, and checked out Chinatown.

6:00 pm: Dinner at House of Nanking. We had dry braised green beans and sesame chicken. Yum!

7:00 pm: We picked up egg custard tarts from Golden Gate Bakery and beer from a grocery store. Then back to the hotel to put Nash to bed, and we enjoyed our beer and tarts while watching Bates Motel. That's how we vacation with a baby. :)

Sunday
8:00 am: Walked to Coit Tower, which was closed, but still offered nice views of the city. Mike saw one of the wild parrots... I didn't.
9:00 am: Breakfast at Moe's. We tried to go to Mama's but the line was insane. Not worth it! And Moe's was really good! Excellent breakfast potatoes.
10:00 am: Nash naptime at the hotel.
11:00 am: Headed to Fisherman's Wharf. Saw seals.
12:00 pm: In-N-Out!

1:00 pm: ALCATRAZ! We were super excited for this, and it was so fun! You get great views from the ferry boat, then a really interesting tour. Definitely a highlight of the trip.

4:00 pm: We got off the ferry back from Alcatraz, and Mike and I split a sundae at Ghirardelli Square. Nash fell asleep in his stroller.
4:30 pm: Walked over to Lombard Street, and saw some more beautiful views!

5:30 pm: After a quick stop at the hotel to freshen up, we stopped at Miette in the Ferry Building to pick up dessert for later (banana cream tart and macarons, both were amazing!)
6:00 pm: Drinks at the Tonga Room. They turned the old swimming pool at the Fairmont Hotel into a tiki lounge bar and restaurant. Anthony Bourdain went there (I think on The Layover), and it made our "Must Do" list. They even had high chairs, so we didn't feel as trashy bringing Nash with us. Haha!

7:00 pm: Mediterranean food that we ate in our hotel room. We were all tired. :)

Monday
7:30 am: Grabbed pastries and sourdough bread from Acme Bread Co.
8:00 am: Picked up a rental car for the day and headed over the Golden Gate Bridge.

9:30 am: Nature walk through Muir Woods. The weather was amazing, and the redwoods were huge and majestic! Nash spent the whole time looking straight up. So precious.

11:30 am: We got back in the car and drove...
1:00 pm: to Napa! We stopped at Dean and Deluca and had a picnic on the grounds of the V. Sattui Winery.

1:45 pm: Wine tasting!
2:30 pm: Back to the city.
4:30 pm: Rest time at the hotel.
5:30 pm: Burritos in the Mission at El Farolito Taqueria.
6:15 pm: Walked around and saw some of the beautiful murals, grabbed a frangipane tart form Tartine, and walked by Mission Dolores.

7:15 pm: Back to the hotel. Bed time for Nash, tv and dessert time for Mike and I.

Tuesday
8:30 am: We walked around Union Square, grabbed a breakfast sandwich, and split a cinnamon roll biscuit from The Biscuit Bender.
11:00 am: After Nash took a quick nap, we took the train out to Haight-Ashbury. (If you watch Parenthood, this is where the Luncheonette is supposed to be. Is that embarrassing? I don't care.) I really wanted to try the ice cream at Bi-Rite, and we did! It was so yummy. We also got a sandwich and chips and "pink drink" there and took it to Alamo Square park for a picnic. Do you know what's in Alamo Square Park? It was our number one thing we wanted to see in San Fran...

The "Full House" house!!!!!!!! AKA the painted ladies!!!

We saved the best for last. And Mike even squeezed in a trip to a little bar that sells a certain beer that is super hard to find. I forget what it's called. Then it was back to pick up our luggage and we were off to the airport to head home.

We didn't make it out to Golden Gate Park, but as Mike said, we are just saving something for next time. :)

February Pizza of the Month: Reuben

2014-03-05T14:26:00.002-08:00

I know all three of you who read this blog have been worried about pizza of the month. We made this on February 28th, so we barely made it time. Phew.

February was reuben pizza. Probably one of the best sandwiches of all time. Rye bread, thousand island dressing, swiss cheese, sauerkraut, and corned beef or pastrami.

Check out January's pizza for crust recipe links.

For this particular pizza, I mixed caraway seeds into the dough to make it taste like rye bread. Again, this pizza didn't really have sauce, but I sprinkled more caraway seeds on top of the crust after I pressed it into a sheet pan.

Then I layered chopped pastrami, sauerkraut, some very thin sliced swiss, and topped it all off with a little sprinkling of mozzarella and provolone. You know, to fill in the holes in the swiss...

It baked at 500° for 12ish minutes. While it baked I mixed up a little thousand island dressing to garnish. Sort of. I abhor mayonnaise. (If I am making Mike a sandwich and he wants mayo on it, I make him spread it himself. I'm a super mean wife.) So I mixed some plain yogurt with a little bit of ketchup, a very little bit of mustard, some chopped sweet pickle, paprika, cayenne, and pepper.

I used the rest of the 12 minutes to drink red wine and google the difference between pastrami and corned beef. Basically, pastrami is corned beef that is smoked.

pastrami : corned beef ::
bacon : pancetta ::
speck : prosciutto

Any and all of those analogies might be incorrect. There's no way to know. Unless we look it up, but I'm not going to.

Thanks for bearing with me through that, now go make some pizza!!!

Packing Lists

2014-02-25T06:05:00.001-08:00

I have a lot of things I want to say; a lot on my mind.

But what I will say is that today we bought plane tickets. We leave in less than two weeks. So tonight I made lists.

I love to make a packing list. Basically as early as I let myself get away with. I have a few little notebooks with days and clothes and food scribbled down. It's like a diary of each trip. What I wore, what we ate.

But of course, I would always add a bunch of things that weren't on the list and end up again with a stuffed suitcase.

Traveling for the past year has been different. We have Nash now. One extra person, but he can't carry his own suitcase. So I have learned to pare down. One less pair of shoes, two fewer shirts, leave that extra dress behind.

We shave away the unnecessary, and we leave only what we need... And I haven't missed a thing.

That's what has happened in my life too. His needs are urgent, mine aren't. My free time is full of laundry and work and dishes and bottles. What I want to do has become: what is best for him?

And in my heart. I have let friendships go that are more work than they are unconditional love. I have let go of grudges, let go of bitterness, let go of pride and feeling like I'm not worth it.

My twin sister in law wondered out loud a while ago... what changes in them were from their loss, and what was simply the change you go though when you are a parent?

I feel the same way. Have I let go of so much selfishness because I am a mom, or because I am Noah and Isaac's aunt?

I think both. I am eternally blessed to have had three special and precious little boys have such a profound impact on my life in the last twelve months.

My life is simpler now, this pared down day to day, but it is most definitely more full.