The Housewife's Trash Heap

Some Kind of Crazy--Michael Jordan B-ball Shoes?

2011-12-24T08:27:00.000-05:00

I don't know about anyone else out there, but I am appalled and a little frightened by the recent idiocy of the folks in Indianapolis over a few pairs of $180 (are you flippin' kidding me?) basketball shoes. With the economy sucking as bad as it is, I am surprised that anyone is spending their money on such a stupid item. Who cares? People were so eager to get the shoes that they tore a store door off its hinges and trampled other human beings! Unbelievable! One woman left her children in a car in order to get the shoes--she was later arrested for leaving them. So these people who were acting like fools and criminals to get a pair of the shoes were saying that it was "business" and they were going to sell them for a profit? Seems to me their energy should be spend doing better things like getting real jobs, or tending to their children, or contemplating the new year. . . anything but acting like idiots for one pair of stupid shoes. If a person is that desperate to make money to feed their families, or whatever the reason was for acting like an animal, I would rather they beg in the streets for money like they do here in Fort Wayne, just a few miles northeast of Indianapolis. What embarrassing, and shameful behavior those people displayed. A pair of shoes! Really???!

Goodbye, 2011!

2011-12-14T08:56:00.002-05:00

I will not be sad to see this year finally come to an end. I believe it has been one of the most difficult years in my life. So many challenges have come my way in the last year that I am looking forward to starting a new year. The bankruptcy has not been the easiest thing to deal with, and while we had hopes that it would relieve us a bit, we are worse off this year than last. With that being said, however, I believe in the end, when we finish paying, and emerge from this long, deep financial fog, we will be stronger, and better for going through it. We now are each working full time, and my husband has taken on a second job just to make ends meet, but it is good to be working hard and trying to do what is right and good. Hopefully, 2012 will bring a little relief, or at least a little bit of respite from the constant worry that we have now become accustomed to. So, to any of you who have been reading my blog entries about filing for bankruptcy, again, my advice would be if at all possible, DO NOT DO IT! If you find that you simply must file, please do so with your eyes wide open and be prepared for an extremely bumpy ride. Here's to a happier new year!

Dog Training Tips

2011-11-14T17:01:00.001-05:00

I have discovered a great place to get information about training your dog. There are videos and blogs and all sorts of cool stuff. I used some of the techniques offered on the site to train my Australian Cattle dog. Great site, visit it if you are interested! The site is called The Dog Training Secret and the address is: www.thedogtrainingsecret.com

Monthly-ish Bankruptcy Update

2011-09-16T23:30:00.000-04:00

So another month has gone by and yes, we are still struggling. Even with my increased hours, we are struggling to make our paychecks stretch so that we can pay all our bills. There isn't a week that goes by that I don't worry about having enough money to buy gas for my car or food for the next week. When I look back to when this whole thing started--some seventeen months ago--I think of all the things we should have done, and should have thought about. It literally makes me sick. Once again, if you found this blog because you are looking for non-legal advise about bankruptcy, then I am begging you to consider the things we learned the hard way.

DO NOT trust everything your lawyer tells you. Be very cautious about what your bankruptcy lawyer tells you. He or she may be the legal expert, but chances are they have never filed for bankruptcy themselves and had to live with the consequences.
DO NOT forget that your lawyer is in this business to make a living for him/herself. Many things they say are not necessarily what will truly happen. They often say things they know you want to hear.
AVOID filing for Chapter 13 bankruptcy if it is at all possible. A Chapter 13 bankruptcy is like being sentenced to serve five years on house arrest. You are allowed to keep your house and your car, but there will be very little money left after the Trustee takes his/her cut. You will be left with only enough money they think is enough to cover your monthly bills. That means if you have any unfortunate turn of events, you will have trouble paying for it. There will be no extras in your life for the next five years. You are free to go to work and come home, but forget about any sort of recreation, restaurant dining or home maintenance or any other "luxury" expense.
KNOW your finances inside out. If there is any way to avoid filing for bankruptcy, do it! If there is a chance you won't pass the means test for a Chapter 7 bankruptcy, then don't move forward unless there is no other way. Even though a Chapter 7 damages your credit, at least it is a clean break and a chance to move forward. With a Chapter 13, you have to pay for five years before you can even start to recover, and even though you will have paid a percentage of your debts back (unlike a Chapter 7 that wipes debts off the books), you will still have the bankruptcy showing up on your credit report for at least seven years.
MAKE SURE you try to negotiate with you creditors before even talking to a lawyer, they may work out a payment plan with you so you can avoid bankruptcy.
BE PREPARED for some really tough times. Do not be afraid to use food banks and help from friends because you will not qualify for any kind of assistance like the free/reduced lunch programs in schools; you still have to pay your income taxes, you still have to live your life, and that requires money. Be prepared to sell things you never thought you could part with, eat things you never thought you would eat, and ask for things you never dreamed of asking for.
BE HUMBLE

Living With Consequences of Chapter 13 Bankruptcy

2011-08-18T14:59:00.000-04:00

It has been a couple of months since I have written anything about our life after this whole bankruptcy mess, and now I have some more to write. Back when we were first deciding whether or not filing for bankruptcy was what we really wanted/needed to do, our lawyer said, "Just wait, you will feel so relieved when you know that every month your bills are being paid by the Trustee. . . " It has been nearly seventeen months since we filed and I have not had a day go by that I was not sick with worry about our money. I can honestly say that we are worse off today than we were one year ago. Our payment plan is so ridiculously high that we are trying to live on $1980.00. We have four children and I have to say that $1900.00 doesn't even cover our utilities and gasoline for our cars so that we can get to work. I have only been able to purchase groceries three times this summer, and every two weeks, right before payday, we invariably run out of food. It is embarrassing to admit this, but we have been getting food from a nearby church's food pantry so that we can eek by each week. I have been forced to sell my furniture (a sectional for $75.00) in order to pay for gasoline to get to work. This whole experience has been nothing like what our attorney led us to believe. We have tried twice to have our payment plan modified so that we can afford food, monthly medication for my husband and one of my daughters, and utilities, but both times we have been denied. Our lawyer seems to be unable to tell us where he is getting the numbers he is throwing out to us, he refuses to go through our schedule I and J line by line so that we can see how our numbers compare to what the Trustee has. He insists that his hands are tied because the Trustee believes we have $3800.00 per month left after our payment to her for our living expenses. I am no math whiz, but I know that $1980.00 does not equal $3800.00. Our attorney cannot seem to come up with an answer for why there is such a discrepancy. He also is unable to tell us exactly why the Trustee objects to our requests. He also has failed to tell us why she took over our mortgage and car payment at the first meeting since we were not in arrears on either payment, and wanted to continue to pay those two items ourselves. There are so many things about this situation that are frustrating. We can't seem to get anywhere with it, and in the meantime, my kids are going to be hungry, meds are not given and we are all dying a slow death.

Seven Years Ago, My Friend Was Found Dead

2011-08-05T16:03:00.001-04:00

Seven years ago today, one of my best friends was found dead in her apartment. If she were alive today, she would be forty-nine years old. I wonder what we would be like now.Hopefully, we would still be calling each other to vent, laugh, and wonder about things. Her life was not easy, but I bet if she would have lived, things would have become much better for her. I miss her and think about her everyday. I wish I could get the answers I am looking for about the mystery surrounding both her life and her death. I will probably keep searching for the truth for a very long time. I am worried that I will forget the important details needed to solve the puzzle of who she really was and why she actually died. I wish I could have one more chance to talk to her. If I could have had that seven years ago, she might still be around. R.I.P., Kaitlyn.

Granny Smith Has to Go

2011-06-04T15:49:00.000-04:00


Meet Granny Smith 1974 Ford Ranger XLT

The time has come to let her go. The old gal has served her purpose and we can't keep her here anymore. It makes me sad, but it is just one of those things. Maybe someone will see her here on my blog and want to take her home with them. She still has a lot of life left in her. She still turns a lot of heads and gets a few honks and whistles while ambling by. Yep, Granny Smith has been a great asset to our family, but sadly, she needs to find a place to live where she will be appreciated and pampered. Here she is folks. If you or anyone you know would like this classy piece of work, just drop me a line. Her price is negotiable.

Search for Money for College Continues. . .

2011-06-02T09:20:00.000-04:00

My search for any kind of financial assistance for my daughter to attend college continues. She has chosen a state university that really isn't that expensive, if you have the funding. As I have written in a previous blog, my husband and I unfortunately had to file for Chapter 13 Bankruptcy a little over a year ago. One of the questions I asked our lawyer was, would we be able to get a student loan so our daughter can go to college? The lawyer said the bankruptcy probably wouldn't interfere with that. Well, the lawyer, in all his brilliance, was wrong! We cannot acquire any more debt while paying off our previous debt. I totally get that, but if we had filed for a Chapter 7 bankruptcy, we would not be in this situation. We failed the means test for a Chapter 7.
I filled out the required FAFSA forms in hopes that she might qualify for some kind of help. The unfortunate thing is that it appears my husband and I have a large income. Being a "displaced housewife," I only earn about $4000 a year, but my husband actually has a really decent job. The only problem is that out of each paycheck, money is taken out directly and sent to the Trustee. We pay a whopping $5595.00 per month to the trustee. That leaves us with a meager $2000.00 per month to feed and clothe our family of six. We have had some unexpected car repair issues and so in order to save enough money to pay to fix the car, I have not purchased groceries like a normal person would. It saddens me to say that my poor nine year old has gone to bed hungry and gone to school without breakfast on several occasions during the last three months or so. We made many an evening meal of watered down pancakes lately! We are quickly becoming accustomed to meat free/protein free meals around here! My point is, if our true finances were being reflected in the FAFSA forms, I believe my daughter would qualify for some sort of grant or loan. We are still waiting for the "Award Letter" from the school so I don't know for sure where we stand. I am heartsick that because of a terrible economy and some unwise decisions that my husband and I made, our whole family is paying the price--my oldest daughter being the one who is taking the brunt of it. It is just sickening.
In my search for scholarships and financial aid, I came across an appalling article that claims parents who do not pay for their child's college education are bad, selfish, negligent parents. I wish I could get ahold of the dude who wrote that piece! There are plenty of suggestions for paying for college for people who are in normal financial situations. I am all for parents helping their kids pay for at least some of their college. If we could just get our daughter started, by the time she is finished we will have paid our debts in full and have the money available to help her pay for any loans she would get. The problem is just getting someone to take a chance, and loan her the money. I am sure this saga will continue. If you are in a similar situation as I am and you have found my blog looking for answers, I am sorry to say that I have not found any, but if I do, I will certainly post them here. Please check back again for any new things I have found out.

Easter Morning!

2011-04-24T11:49:00.000-04:00

One of my favorite days of the year. He is risen. . . . . . .

He is risen indeed!

Happy Easter!

Paying for College While in Bankruptcy

2011-04-21T10:01:00.001-04:00

One of the most frustrating things I have encountered lately is the whole college education funding problem. For most people, this process seems easy. You fill out the FAFSA form, you apply for scholarships, and sometimes you get money to help pay for your kid's education.If you don't happen to qualify for any assistance, then you can apply for a loan, and bang, you are good to go. . . EXCEPT when you have me, or my husband for a parent, then things all of a sudden become complicated. We have completed the FAFSA, my daughter searched for appropriate scholarships she could apply for, and she has been accepted to the college of her choice. The only problem is that we can't afford it. My daughter has been rejected for all of the scholarships she applied for. As of yesterday, all hopes of winning even a little scholarship money are dashed; the last rejection letter came in yesterday's mail. My poor daughter, crestfallen! The problem for us is that we are not in a minority, my husband and I are still married, my husband and I both have jobs, and my daughter is "only" a B student. On the surface, that doesn't sound like a bad thing, and it also looks like we should be able to at least help our daughter apply for a loan, but things are not always the way they appear to be on the outside. If you were to look just beneath the fraying edges of our family life, you would see that we are sitting precariously on the very top of a dangerous cliff; one little thing could send us over the edge. Because my husband and I are in an active Chapter 13 bankruptcy, three quarters of what we earn is taken by the court appointed trustee to pay our debts. The other one quarter of the income is to go to pay for groceries, utilities and healthcare. We are not in a position to co-sign on a loan. The FAFSA forms do not reflect the "sins" of the parents. It only looks at how much a person earns, not at what, where or how much of it goes to other things. So, because of the financial ineptitude of my husband and I, my dear daughter(s) are suffering. They are the ones who will be shouldering the cost of something my husband and I should, at the very least, be assisting with. My daughters will be impacted by a mistake my husband made and my inability to see it and insist that it be remedied, for years to come.

If you are currently considering filing for bankruptcy, or are currently in Chapter 13 bankruptcy, and you have found my blog because you were looking for help paying for your child's education, I am sorry, I do not have any help to offer you. There does not seem to be any assistance anywhere. Our only hope is that our daughter will be able to get a high interest student loan with a deferred repayment plan. If that happens, then we might be able to help her in four years when we have paid back all our previous debt. If you are considering filing for bankruptcy, please do a lot of research and if possible, find another way to get out of debt. Bankruptcy is awful and should be an absolute last resort.

No News

2011-04-20T11:12:00.000-04:00

There is a lot of crap going on in the world today. There is very little good news that is reported. Everything seems to be negative, and I am wondering how much of this continued negativity are we (individuals, countries, planet) going to be able to take? Things have gotten so bad that I do not listen to any talk radio shows. I no longer watch any shows like Jon Stewart or The Colbert Report. I actually do not even watch any news except the portion on the local news that gives the weather, but even that isn't good. What is happening to us? Why is there nothing good going on? Or, if there is good news out there, why are "journalists" choosing to ignore it? That old saying, "No news is good news" always puzzled me. Does it mean that not hearing any news from anyone means that there is so much good that there is nothing to report? Or does it mean that there is so much bad news that the only news there is is bad? Geez, I think I just confused myself again. The way things are now, for me, that old saying means there isn't any good news to report; not anywhere, not at any time. Now I think I'm depressed. . . I don't want to hear only bad news. Please, someone, find something good to report!

Firmoo, Funny Name, Good Company

2011-03-26T15:56:00.000-04:00

My last post was about ordering prescription eyeglasses online from www.zenni.com. I have more recently discovered an fairly new online prescription eyeglass company called Firmoo (www.firmoo.com). Funny name, I think, but there must be a reason for it. Anyway, I purchased two pairs of eyeglasses for myself from this company. The frames were very inexpensive, so I ordered one pair with my bifocal prescription and another with single vision. It took about ten days for my order to arrive. While the glasses I ordered did correct my vision, they were just too large a frame for my face, so I decided to send them back. The company offers a no questions asked return policy, and they have a fairly generous refund policy as well, but in order to receive a full refund, the glasses need to be returned within 7 days from when you receive them. Since the company is in California and the glasses are shipped there from China, getting the glasses returned withing that 7 day window was nearly impossible for me since I live more than 1000 miles from the west coast. If you return your purchase within 30 days, you can get 50% of the price refunded. You also have to contact the company, either by telephone or e-mail in order to get a "Return Authorization Number" (RAN). I chose to contact them by email, and I lost a little time doing that. Instead of getting a refund, I decided I wanted to just exchange my glasses for a different pair. It got a little complicated, but in the end, I was sent a code to type into my order form that subtracted the amount I was due. I waited another ten days, and my replacement pair of eyeglasses arrived! They correct my vision just great and have that funky, retro look that I like. Firmoo also includes a handy little screwdriver and extra screws, a case and a lint free cloth with each order. In dealing with the company, I found that they were very willing to work with me in order to make me a satisfied customer. Their correspondence with me was friendly and made me feel like they really wanted my business.
There are a couple of things to remember when you are ordering. If you use a credit card, you will be charged a small separate fee for an international transaction. If you pay through PayPal, you can avoid that extra charge. The pictures of the glasses are accurate and almost exactly the size they are in real life. There is a " virtual try on" feature which has various pictures of different faces that you can try the frames on to see how they look. If I had it to do over again, I would probably try to find a photo of myself to load onto that feature so that I could get a more accurate feel for how the glasses would look on me. If I would have done that in the first place, I might have been able to avoid the problem I had with the first pairs.
These days, glasses are almost a fashion accessory, and it is fun to have different pairs of glasses to wear for different occasions and outfits, but buying more than one pair of glasses at your eye doctor's office or at Lenscrafters or any other retail store is just too expensive to be able to do that. Firmoo, with it's friendly customer service, huge selection and low prices makes buying extra glasses something that just about any budget can manage. I feel comfortable recommending Firmoo, even if it does have a funny name!

Google Adsense Works, Haters be Damned!

2011-03-18T08:40:00.000-04:00

For some reason, my silly little blog has taken some pretty cheap shots from readers (haters?) who seem to think that just by reading one of my posts they know who I am and feel the need to criticize me. I don't understand that at all, and even though it shouldn't, it does actually hurt when people make comments that are unfairly critical. I post a lot of entries that are just what is bugging me or causing some sort of distress in my life. I post it because, quite frankly, it feels good to get it out. Maybe someone will read it and feel a little less alone, or feel like their troubles are not as bad as they thought, or it may make them mad. I don't know. I also post entries about products and services I have tried because sometimes people want to know about that kind of thing. It shouldn't be the source of such criticism. One of the last entries I wrote was about an optical firm I purchased some prescription eyeglasses from. One (possibly the only) reader felt the need to criticize my writing and continued writing nasty comments. I deleted one, and he criticized me for that. That sort of stuff seems so unnecessary to me, and why it hurts my feelings, I don't know. What I do know is that this blog makes money for me. No matter how many negative comments it gets, I am making money, and that is what makes doing this worth it. I have created a nice, yet small, stream of income from my writing even if in someone elses opinion, it is not good, or it is boring, or it appears to be something it's not. As it turns out, the haters seem to be the ones who are helping me make a little money, and that makes me the winner. I am proof that writing a blog and connecting it with Google Adsense works, plain and simple. Don't hate me because I am successful.

Ordering Prescription Eyeglasses Online-Zenni Optical

2011-02-28T08:12:00.000-05:00

Most people have never thought of ordering their prescription eyeglasses online. I didn't think you even could, but while I was living in rural Virginia where nothing was easy to get to, and the thought of picking out overpriced eyeglasses frames at the one optometrist's office seemed too much for me to bear, I started poking around the internet to see if I could get glasses online. You can get everything else, why not eyeglasses? It took up quite a lot of time to find a site that looked professional and that had many frames to choose from. The site I found is called Zenni Optical. The website is very easy to navigate and there were hundreds of eyeglass frames to look at. So many, in fact, that it is quite time consuming to go through all your options in order to find the just the right ones. I have ordered glasses from Zenni Optical,www.zennioptical.com on three different occasions. I ended up ordering some three years ago, and that pair of glasses happens to be one of my all-time favorite pairs. They were cute, corrected my vision well, and the best thing of all is that they were only $12.95! That's right, and that was including the shipping. Since that pair of glasses, I have recently ordered a pair of glasses for two of my daughters. Both of them are very pleased with my purchase and if anything happens to the glasses, it's not like I spent $300.00 on them! I spend $15.95 and $14.90 on them. Zenni Optical offers a wide variety of frames that can accommodate bifocal prescriptions as well. You can choose from regular or progressive lenses (progressives will be an additional $4.95) The shipping was only around $4.95 as well. The prices I listed above were the TOTAL including the shipping. Zenni Optical has really been good for me. All six of us wear glasses/contacts. For those of us in the family who wear contacts, we only really need our glasses as a backup or for only occasional wear, so it really makes more economical sense to purchase inexpensive glasses. For my one kiddo, and husband who wear their glasses full time, I am confident that the glasses are of good quality and wearable full-time. One word of caution though, since you are ordering online, you cannot really try them on your face, so you need to have a metric ruler on hand to measure and compare frames to find one that fits your face. There is a "tryon" tool you can use to try the glasses on an uploaded picture of yourself, if that is what you want to do. If the glasses need to be adjusted, I am sure you can run them into a Walmart or some other optical place to have them fitted to your face. All in all, I would highly recommend Zenni Optical if you are looking to save some money on your prescription eyeglasses, or if you just want to buy funky or unusual frames. It is fun to see what they have to offer.

Strange, Strange Things Are Happening

2011-02-05T10:15:00.000-05:00

I haven't posted in awhile because I am working on a review of two companies that sell prescription eyeglasses--Zenni Optical and Firmoo. It is taking awhile to gather my information and do my writing, so in the meantime I just wanted to post some of the strange things that are taking place in my world these days. First of all, I am having a sock crisis in my home. None of us has the proper matching socks. The other day I saw my youngest daughter walking around in her sock feet and upon looking closer, I discovered that not only was she wearing mismatched socks, one of them was a knee sock and the other was an anklet. Whaaat? I asked her why and she said she couldn't find a mate to either one so just wore them together. Then when I looked at my other girls' feet, the all also were wearing mismatched socks. I have to admit that I am the one who does most of the laundry around here and there are almost always unmatched socks (my husband's and mine included) at the bottom of the clothes basket. Why is this happening? I can't figure it out. Is the dryer doing something sinister with them? Are the dogs hiding them? I will have to start investigating this soon before all our socks disappear!

The other weird thing going on is the disappearance of the o.b. brand of tampons. Not actually at my house because I haven't had much trouble finding them in our area stores, but apparently in other parts of the country, the applicator-less tampon (which I prefer) has gone missing. There is some sort of conspiracy theory and swirling accusations about the reason this little box of unmentionables has disappeared from store shelves. There is even talk of black market sales of these things. I checked on ebay yesterday and saw that a bundle of three boxes were at a bid of $94.00. I'm thinking maybe I should buy what I can find here and sell them at a hefty profit! Anyway, I am going to do some more investigating on this phenomenon as well. It will be my Sock and Tampon Project. Until then. . . .

New Year, Better Year?

2011-01-17T09:06:00.000-05:00

So far, the new year seems to be starting out on a more positive note than last year. I am happy to report that my Adsense account has grown substancially and I am excited about that. I am not making tons of money, but my sense of accomplishment makes me feel so good. I have now come to a point where my blogging earns something almost everyday, so I am proof that it can be done, even by someone who just writes about my life and my experiences. Anyone who is considering blogging and using Google Adsense should definitely go for it! Other financial matters seem to be less critical for the moment, but I am still longing to find a way to get my family out of the stupid Chapter 13 by paying it all off at once. I know it sounds crazy, but I really think I can eventually find a way. In the meantime, I am going to keep blogging away and I have also found a new site that pays you to post. It is called List My Five. I haven't earned anything yet, but I believe it will only be a matter of time. If you want to check it out for yourself, go to www.listmyfive.com. Cheers for a happy 2011!

Hoover Platinum Series Upright is a Royal Pain

2010-12-03T08:13:00.000-05:00

I hate to complain about products on my blog, but I'm going to do it today anyway. About a year and a half ago I needed a vacuum. I researched different products and prices and found one (the Platinum series bagged upright) that I thought would be an excellent buy and exactly what I needed. Unfortunately, I was wrong. The vacuum is lightweight and has a high and low setting, and has a heavy duty, large bag--all of these things are great about it, but the one thing that the company must have thought would be a good thing, is what is driving me and everyone else who uses it in my home, crazy. There is this little feature that turns the machine off if something it things is bad passes under the brush. You know when you get too close to a shoelace, or yarn and it gets all twisted onto the spinning brush? On most of my machines, if this happens, I have to turn it off or else the brush will keep spinning and spinning and will over heat and melt the drive belt or something. Or maybe the whole vacuum could explode or something, I really don't know. I just know that it can mess up your vacuum. So, this Hoover Platinum series vacuum touts a little component that trips if it thinks you've got ahold of somthing that is going to get caught up in the brush. The only problem is that this thing trips all the time! One little crumb on the carpet and it turns off. One piece of fuzz and the thing turns off. One small bump of the machine into the wall and it turns off. What a pain! I talk and swear at this vacuum constantly. The really sad thing is that it really does a good job of vacuuming when it decides to do the work. If you are looking for a new vacuum, my advice would be to stay away from the Hoover Platinum Series Upright unless you have the patience of Job and nerves of steel. It just isn't worth the $200+ pricetag and the frustration.

Back to "Normal"

2010-11-29T08:32:00.000-05:00

Finally there is a little peace in my house. My husband has gone back to work after a week long vacation, the kids are back at school today, and, at last I have a little peace and quiet this morning. Don't get me wrong, I like the holidays and having some company and everything, but it really is stressful to have a house full of people. Having four kids, two dogs, and two birds all the time, you would think having extra people in the house wouldn't be that big of a deal, but it is. Our house is routinely a loud, messy place, but the change in routine messes me up. Even having my husband home on holidays throws me off a bit, and usually makes me grumpy. All normalcy goes out the window when he is home. He is one of the biggest mess-makers there is. He also likes to be pampered and catered to when he is home which is something I have a low tolerance for. I get so resentful because I am the only one doing any work. I never get a "vacation." The regular running of a household must continue whether there is a break from work and school or not. The household responsibilities fall squarely on my shoulders and it gets to me sometimes. For just one day, I would like to be responsibility free, and by that I mean not having to do any of my usual chores. For the last 21 years, if I happen to spend time away from home shopping or something else, when I come home, there is a mess left for me to clean up. The girls and I went to church yesterday and when we left, my husband was sitting in his pajamas staring at the computer. I left the bed unmade, the dishwasher unemptied, the carpet unvacuumed, and the dogs had the run of the house. Guess what I walked into when I got home a couple of hours later? That's right, the same damn mess that was there when I left, so I promptly got to work doing stuff I really don't want to do on a Sunday afternoon. My husband said yesterday that he is going to invite his mother, sister and nephew to our house for Christmas. I can hardly wait! I think turnabout is fair play, so I will leave the meal planning and preparation, the cleaning and supervising all to him. After all, I think I deserve a little break after entertaining my family this past week.

On the Hunt (for Bonnie)

2010-11-18T11:18:00.000-05:00

I am missing my Bonnie. Bonnie Hunt, that is. Ever since the powers that be decided to stop taping her show, I have been lost. I have been forced into watching the "Rachel Ray" show, and then that stupidest of morning time killers, "Let's Make a Deal." I know, I know, I'm not really being forced to watch anything, and many times I choose not to turn on the television in the morning when I am getting ready for work (I work in the afternoon). Rachel Ray is okay, I guess, but she is so loud and it feels like she is using her voice as a weapon. The show is also such a weird mix of cooking and serious subjects that I just don't enjoy it all that much. Rachel is lacking that sharp as a tack sense of humor that Bonnie has. Also, Bonnie just seems like me. Like we could be instant friends, I don't get that feeling from Rachel Ray, she is a bit too harsh for me. That other waste of time I mentioned, "Let's Make a Deal" is such a cheap show. The contestants should never take anything other than the sure thing because they almost always lose. The show is just too cheap (unlike "The Price is Right"--which I do sort of like) and cheesy. Anyway, I really, really miss you Bonnie! Your mom and Don and all the gang too. Where are you? What projects are you working on? How is Charlie? I miss you!!!

So Many Unknowns

2010-11-16T08:20:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I wrote a post about how this Chapter 13 bankruptcy is slowly killing me, and it truly is, I think. I have so many unanswered questions and the lawyer is not very helpful. Most of the information I have found out by searching on the internet and from the free webinar from Stephen Snyder, but it seems that most of the information out there is in regard to Chapter 7 bankruptcies. I have no idea what I should be doing now to rebuild my credit. On of the things Stephen Snyder says to do is to get a prepaid Visa or MasterCard, but there is no way I can do that because you have to have money to deposit into that Visa or MasterCard. All of our money is going to the trustee and what little is leftover pays for a few groceries, gasoline and essentials for my kids. It seems to me that people who file Chapter 7--who walk away without being required to pay back anything-- have more options than people like me who are trying to do the right thing and trying to pay back as much as possible. To make me feel even worse, that awful trustee looked me in the eye and said that if I couldn't prove that I was giving money to my church, then she would have to raise our monthly payment even more. Since we have begun payments to the trustee (nearly $6000 per month), I have been unable to give much to my church on any regular basis. If the money is in my wallet, I put it in the plate. Our lawyer said that if you want to just not give money to the church and save it for a vacation (what a joke!) then no one would even question it. I am so discouraged. We made a mistake, and are trying to do the right thing, but we are never going to recover at this rate. If anyone out there has any good, true knowledge about rebuilding credit while in a Chapter 13 bankruptcy, please let me know!

This is Killing Me!

2010-11-15T09:08:00.000-05:00

I noticed that it has been almost a month since I have last written a post. There was a time when I was spitting out at least one new post a week. It seems this bankruptcy thing is sucking every last bit of life out of me. I have noticed lately that I just don't enjoy anything the way I used to. It feels like I am in jail and am serving at least a five year sentence. Every minute of every day, I am worried about money, and if we are going to make it to the next paycheck. This is no way to live my life. I keep trying to change my thinking about this, but I just get so bogged down with worry. With the holidays coming up, there is even more worry. I have already told the girls there won't be much gift giving this year. After the payment to the trustee, there is only enough money to buy a few groceries. On weeks that there are other expenses like lunch money or clothes, I really sweat it. It is no longer fun to think about having all the family over for Thanksgiving. All I can think about is how much more money I am going to have to spend, not only on the extra food items, but on extra toilet paper, our water bill will be higher, our electric bill will go up, so will our heating bill. All of these things are now worrisome to me. Before, I was just so happy to have everyone over, having a good time, now the joy is gone. Everything seems like a joke to me. I need to have my carpets cleaned, and our truck needs a little work. Our mattress needs to be replaced, and before this stupid bankruptcy, we would have been able to get all these little things taken care of. My husband said that we should just get a mattress that would count for Christmas, Anniversary, and birthday gifts to each other. Well, that's a nice idea, but there isn't money for any of those gifts now and there won't be any later, there is never any leftover money to even put in our savings, so saying something like that, to me, is just meaningless. There just isn't any point in planning on anything. The best I can do is pay the bills we have, scrape up enough to buy groceries and hope to God nothing catastrophic happens. Again, if you are considering filing for bankruptcy, my advice is to do anything possible, check into any alternative you can, before filing--this is hell and it is killing me slowly.

Sexy Halloween?

2010-10-20T08:15:00.001-04:00

Sexy Cookie Monster

Has anyone noticed the slow change in Halloween celebrations and costumes? Everything is sexy this, and sexy that. I took two of my daughters out this past weekend to look at costumes, and I actually saw a "Sexy Cookie Monster" costume!! Really? The costume consisted of a blue furry hat thing a dress and thigh high blue hose. Who thought of that? Not only are the costumes getting racier, they are also extremely expensive! A "sexy" candy corn witch costume was $49.99. Who out there thinks candy corn is sexy??? Halloween used to be all about kids having fun and neighbors gathering and spending time making costumes and having bonfires, bobbing for apples (which I guess is now pretty much taboo because of evil germs!) Sexy? I just don't get it. I was actually glad I didn't bring my youngest daughter to the store with me that day. Everything was so gross and sleazy! I have always made my daughters' costumes, but this year I happen to actually have a job, so my time is a little more limited. I gave in to the idea of getting store bought costumes. I regret that thought. I think we will be resurrecting, and reworking some costumes I have already made. I don't want my daughters walking around in "sexy" costumes. What is our world coming to?

My myLot

2010-10-15T08:07:00.001-04:00

I have just rediscovered a little site I used a few years ago to earn a little bit of extra cash. I don't remember the reason I stopped using it, but I was recently reacquainted with the site, and now I remember that it was kind of fun. It is a little bit like Facebook, but it is all about discussion and participation. The more you participate, the more you can earn. Like Facebook, it can really eat up a lot of your time if you let it, but it is easy to justify your time spent on myLot because you are earning a little bit of money. I am not saying that you will get rich, but having $10.00 a month put in your PayPal account is not a bad thing. These days, for me, 10 bucks is quite a treat!

www.mylot.com/?ref=Chickenscratch

After Bankruptcy

2010-10-05T10:39:00.003-04:00

As I have written about before, my husband and I filed for Chapter 13 bankruptcy in April of this year. So far, it has caused us nothing but humiliation and heartache. There has not been that feeling of: "Ah. . I'm so relived. . ." We are paying a huge amount to try to pay back as much as we possibly can to our debtors. We have been treated like we are lepers and imbeciles, so it has not been an easy road so far. I really didn't expect that it would be, but I thought that I would have some sort of feeling of relief. That has yet to manifest. I have nothing but worry right now. My husband and I did, however attend a web seminar ("webinar") that we received an invitation for. The invitation came from Stephen Snyder who has spent the last 15 years trying to make bankrupt people feel better and come out of bankruptcy stronger. Mr. Snyder is the head of his After Bankruptcy Foundation, and is trained by the Fair Isaac Corporation (FICO). I had my doubts about Mr. Snyder, but the seminar was helpful, albeit long--4 hours! I did a little research on Stephen Snyder and found out that he is from my hometown of Goshen and graduated from high school the same year I did. Our high schools were "cross-town" rivals. How bad can a guy be who hails from a small Indiana town, and actually still lives in a small Indiana town. He is legit, and if you are struggling with life after your bankruptcy, I would highly recommend connecting with Stephen Snyder. Most of the things he talked about didn't really apply to my husband and I because we were not in arrears on any of or our bills, there is no foreclosure, no judgements or liens against us, we just were buried in credit card debt and a huge IRS bill. While I still think we could have worked things out without the complication and consequences of bankruptcy, our life now is what it is--Stephen Snyder sort of put things in perspective and assured us that life does go on, and you can emerge from it a better person. If you need help or want to participate in one of Stephen Snyder's workshops, here is his website https://www.afterbankruptcy.com/. Good luck, and please feel free to leave your comments here.

Another Kick in the Butt

2010-09-27T08:54:00.000-04:00

I have written before about this stupid bankruptcy decision we made several months ago. Things just keep getting worse. This has to be one of the worst decisions we ever made! What is happening now is that the car I drive is leased. The lease will be up in a few months, and, according to our lawyer, we are "allowed" to lease a car without going through getting permission from the Trustee. We cannot purchase a car without first getting the okay from the Trustee. We have been getting some fliers and correspondence in the mail about turning in our lease and getting something else. It would be a few months early, but whatever. We thought that maybe we could turn our car in and lease another for a much smaller monthly payment. Anything we can do to help our budget, we are willing to do. So, off we went to the car dealership. We do the little dance you have to do with car salesmen, and then we tell him that our credit stinks and that we are in an active bankruptcy. The salesman didn't really seem shocked or anything and he said, "Well, we work with a lot of folks who have bad credit, so I will talk to our sales manager and see what we can do." I thought, "Gee, for once, things might work out well for us." I thought wrong. The salesman came back (very quickly, I might add) and said that no bank would touch us and that we should just keep the car and turn it in when the lease is up. I can totally understand the car dealership's position, but for us, things won't be any different a few months from now. We will still have the active bankruptcy, and we will still be turning the car in. I am now assuming that when the lease is up, we won't be in any better position to lease another one. It all feels so awful. We are failures! No matter what we try to do, we get bad news, bad results. It feels like we are lepers. Thankfully, my 1974 Ford pick-up truck is running pretty well and my husband's car is in good condition. We will use the truck until it can't be used anymore, and after that, who knows? This is all so humiliating!