Fun & Jokes

2011-07-24T20:29:00.000-07:00

Siva Info Systems :: Useful Notes: Divide & Rule! still there?

2008-09-24T08:44:00.000-07:00

Siva Info Systems :: Useful Notes: Divide & Rule! still there?

Before & After Marriage :)

2008-09-11T00:13:00.000-07:00

Before Marriage
He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: No! Don't even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course! Over and over!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: No! Why are you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Every chance I get.
She: Will you hit me?
He: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes.
She: Darling!

After marriage....

Simply read the above from bottom to top..

Dasavatharam - Film

2008-06-15T01:43:00.000-07:00

Starring: Kamal Hassan, Asin, Mallika Sherawath, Santhana Bharathy, Nepoleon, and Others

Banner: Aascar Films
Production: V.Ravichandran
Direction: K.S. Ravi Kumar
Story, Screenplay and dialogues: Kamal Haasan
Art: Thotta Tharani and Sameer Chanda
Music: Himesh Reshammiya
Background Score: Devi Shri Prasad

An embodiment of perfect film is all we have got to say about Dasavatharam. Put down the controversies and hurdles that this flick faced and today it makes up for all. Blending science and spirituality and of course the unforgettable disaster Tsunami together, this is an awesome movie delivered by K.S.Ravikumar and Kamal Haasan. For sure, it looks like the core of Dasavatharam bloomed up with Kamal Haasan on the day of Tsunami that had hit before four years.

If 10 Avatars were ideated by Kamal Haasan, Director K.S.Ravikumar has well executed these characters weaving relationship between each of them. Each and every character on screen has something to do more crucial throughout 3 hours of spine chilling thriller.

In simple, Dasavatharam is about a God’s statue that weaves a network between 10 characters played by Kamal Haasan…

The film opens with Govindarajan (Kamal Haasan), a scientist from NASA addressing a huge crowd at Nehru Stadium where Chief Minister Karunanidhi, Prime Minister Manmohan Singh and American President George Bush seated as chief guests. In his speech, Govindarajan speaks about the history of a statue that has passed through many ages carrying supernatural power. Immediately, with no fraction of seconds you are taken back to 12th century where Raja Nambi (Kamal Haasan) wildly attacks his king’s soldiers removing a God’s statue from the temple. Enraged King Raja Kulothunga (Napoleon) has Raja Nambi tied to the statue and thrown into the sea.

Straight off to the 21st Century, the scene starts with December 20, 2004 where Govindaraju aka Govind (Kamal Haasan) is shown formulating a biological weapon at NASA. But situations are tougher, when the weapon goes high in demand and people are right behind to grab it… The tale further moves about for other 4 days where 9 different characters encounter each other.

Grandeur indeed, the film has the best fascinating treat for the audiences who yearned to watch this flick for over many days. We are sure that Dasavatharam is sure to take Tamil cinema couple of steps ahead. If Kamal Haasan as Raja Nambi makes your emotions raised, for laughter you have CBI Naidu trickling your ribs with his laughter elements. Of course, this character travels right throughout the film and even the Hit Man on negative (again played by Kamal Haasan) does the same.

Excellence is more witnessed with the character of American President George Bush. Not alone about his makeover we are speaking about, but his very attributes of unknowledgeable personality makes whole lot of sense and this is real piece of neat work for those who are well versed the real man of United States.

The foolish conversations like ‘What is NACL?” is really throwing us all hitting the floors with intellectual comedy tracks.

Despite playing dual roles in the film, Asin hasn’t got much to do on her part, but her works are really outstanding and in particular her enunciating the Brahmin style is really mind blowing. Malikka Sherawat with an item number and few series of sequences perform equally well on the pars.

Well, its really breathtaking to see that Tsunami and a simple Statue have been rendered with powerful roles in this film. Technical aspects takes you all far behind your imagination, but graphic works are really unwanted for the moment. Cinematographer Ravi Varman for no specified reason keeps moving the camera up and down.

When it comes to Himesh Reshamiya and Devi Sri Prasad, both these buddies have rocked with splendid musical scores. ‘Oh Oh Sanam’ sang by Kamal Haasan is really good since it carries a good message. Devi Sri Prasad with his background scoring alone enhances the visual quality.

As a whole, things that make us sing appraisals of Dasavatharam are a grandeur work of Kamal Haasan and K.S. Ravi Kumar. But, will this flick hit the bull’s eyes among the front benchers is a big question.

You have two cows! :)

2008-02-25T22:30:00.001-08:00

ANARCHISM: You have two cows. The cows decide you have no right to do anything with their milk and leave to form their own society.

ANARCHISM: You have two cows. You steal your neighbor's bull and ignore the government.

ANARCHISM: You have two cows. You keep the cows and steal another one. You ignore the government.

ANARCHISM: You have two cows. Either you sell the milk at a fair price or your neighbors try to take the cows and kill you.

ANARCHISM: You have two cows. Your neighbor hits you over the head with a brick, steals your cows, then shoots them for fun. You later discover that he is a Nazi.

ARISTOCRATISM: You have two cows. You sell both and buy one really big cow - with a pedigree.

ARTIST -- VISUAL: You have two cows. You stuff them and put them in glass display boxes. In London.

BAHRAINISM: You have two cows. Some high government official steals one, milks it, sells the milk and pockets the profit. The government tells you there is just one cow and not enough milk for the people. The people riot and scream death to the government and carry Iranian flags. The Parliament, after thinking for 11 months, decides to employ ten Bahrainis to milk all the cows at the same time to cut back on unemployment.

BRITISH: You have two cows. They are crazy. You try to sell them in Europe.

BRITISH -- MAJOR: You have two cows. One has BSE. You get a vet to give the other one the all clear, and then declare there is no problem from BSE in your country.

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. At first the government regulates what you can feed them and when you can milk them. Then it pays you not to milk them. Then it takes both, shoots one, milks the other and pours the milk down the drain. Then it requires you to fill out forms accounting for the missing cows.

BUREAUCRACY: You have two cows. To register them, you fill in 17 forms in triplicate and don't have time to milk them.

BUREAUCRACY -- EUROPEAN UNION: You have two cows. The EU loses one cow, milks the other and then spills the milk.

BUREAUCRACY -- UNITED STATES: You have two cows. The government takes both, loses one while moving it to a farm in Puerto Rico and forgets to milk the other.

CANADIANISM: You have two cows. The bank takes both of them, shoots one, throws away the milk and you shoot yourself.

CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

CAPITALISM -- AMERICAN: You have two cows. You sell one of them, and buy a bull. The cow and bull have a great love life; you sell the movie rights to Hollywood. Then you go into real estate.

CAPITALISM -- HONG KONG You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt / equity swap with associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax deduction for keeping five cows. The milk rights of six cows are transferred via a Panamanian intermediary to a Cayman Islands company secretly owned by the majority shareholder, who sells the rights to all seven cows' milk back to the listed company. The annual report says that the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. Meanwhile, you kill the two cows because the feng shui is bad.

CENTRALISM: You have two cows. And a problem finding them in the middle of the field with 100,000,000 other cows.

CONSERVATIVISM: You have two cows. You freeze the milk and embalm the cows.

CONSERVATIVISM: You have two cows. You lock them up, and charge people to look at them.

COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and gives you part of the milk.

COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both cows. The government sells the milk in government stores. You can't afford the milk. You wither away.

COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The state takes both, and gives you a little milk ... once.

COMMUNISM: You have two cows. The government takes both and gives you spoiled milk.

COMMUNISM -- CAMBODIAN: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.

COMMUNISM -- CAMBODIAN: You have two cows. The government sends a teenager in a red bandana to shoot them, then he shoots you.

COMMUNISM -- CHINESE: You don't have any cows. The government sets up a joint venture with McDonald's.

COMMUNISM -- CHINESE: You have two cows. You take care of them. The government takes all the milk, but you are encouraged to steal some of it back (before someone else does).

COMMUNISM -- CHINESE - MAO STYLE: You have two pigs. The government launches a campaign to convince you to donate them "voluntarily" to provide meat for workers in the city. The government then declares that people don't need pigs to make pork. Quoting the correct phrases from your little red book, you and your neighbors try to create pork from sheer willpower. Your local party leader reports that you have exceeded all expectations. Your neighbors starve.

COMMUNISM -- CUBAN - CASTRO STYLE: Fidel Castro has two cows. They are F1's, a cross between the Cebu cow and the Holstein cow. Only one cow, "White Udder," works. When she dies she is stuffed and placed in a museum by Castro, "The Dictator of the Cows," where "future generations could admire her magnificent udders." You have not seen cow milk since 1985.

COMMUNISM -- CUBAN: You have two cows. Fidel tells you some undercover CIA agents have infected all of the cows in your region with a foreign disease that kills the cows. You and your family become malnourished. It begins to occur to you that Fidel doesn't know what he is talking about.

COMMUNISM -- CUBAN: You no longer have any cows. They sailed to Miami. You still have no milk - but you do have Fidel.

COMMUNISM -- "PURE": You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk.

COMMUNISM -- "PURE": You have two cows. Your neighbors help you take care of them, and you all share the milk. Well, maybe the local bully gets more, or a few neighbors band together to kill you so that there is more milk for everyone else.

COMMUNISM -- SOVIET: You have two cows. You have to take care of them, but the government takes all the milk. Then the government sends you to prison.

COMMUNISM -- SOVIET: You have two cows. You count them and realize you have
four cows. You drink more Vodka. You count the cows again and realize you have eleventy six cows. You drink even more Vodka. After a while, you realize that eleventy isn't a real number. You count the cows again and have two cows. You open another bottle of Vodka and try to drown the loss of eleventy four cows.

DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. Your neighbors decide who gets the milk.

DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. A vote is held, and the cows win.

DEMOCRACY: You have two cows. They outvote you 2-1 to ban all meat and dairy products. You go bankrupt.

DEMOCRACY -- AMERICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk and then blame Japan while border guards beat up Mexicans sneaking into the country. People are outraged for a week or so and then go back to televised sports where there's no violence.

DEMOCRACY -- AMERICAN (a republic): You have two cows. The government exercises those powers delegated to it by the people, who are sovereign. The majority does not rule because the people and their representatives (elected, appointed and employed) are constrained by various checks and balances, including the Constitution, the Bill of Rights, the three co-equal branches of government, and the 50 state republics (see, e.g., Article IV, section 4). So what the government does with your cows and with the milk from those cows depends on the interaction between the people and the checks and balances mentioned above.

DEMOCRACY -- BRITISH: You have two cows. You feed them sheep's brains and they go mad. The government doesn't do anything.

DEMOCRACY -- REPRESENTATIVE: You have two cows. Your neighbors pick someone to tell you who gets the milk.

DICTATORSHIP: You have two cows. The government takes both cows and drafts you.

DUBAISM: You have two cows. You create a website for them and advertise them in all magazines. You create a Cow City or Milk Town for them. You sell off their milk before the cows have even been milked to both legitimate and shady investors who hope to resell the non-existent milk for a 100% profit in two years' time. You bring Tiger Woods to milk the cows first to attract attention.

EGYPTIANISM: You have two cows. Both are voting for Moooooobarak!

EUROPEAN UNIONISM: You have two goats. The EU declares them to be fruit in order to conform to a rare Belgian custom of making Cow Jam (jam being required to have at least 45% fruit).

EUROPEAN UNIONISM: You have two cows. The EU develops a quota system that "limits the gas emissions from flatulent cows." You sell your carbon allotment, not the milk.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, hires you to take care of them, and sells you the milk.

FASCISM: You have two cows. You give the milk to the government and the government sells it.

FASCISM: You have two cows. The government takes one away and presses it into military service.

FEUDALISM: You have two cows. Your lord takes some of the milk.

FRISBEETARIANISM: You have two cows. One of them flies up on the roof and gets stuck. You hope the government provides cow ladders.

IDEALISM: You have two cows. You get married and your partner milks them.

INDUSTRIALISM: You have two cows. You dissect them both and figure out how to build a milk-factory instead.

IRAQISM: The British Government sends in a herd of 20 cows in a trial run to help a village outside Basra. The villagers are extremely grateful for the extra milk and the health of the children improves daily. A terrorist group then kidnaps the cows and accuses them of being traitors to "the cause." The terrorists then produce signed confessions from the cows and systematically assassinates each one in front of Al Jazeera television cameras.

KUWAITISM: Upon hearing how popular cows are in the Gulf region, a group of young male Kuwaitis buy a herd. Unfortunately, they attach so many accessories (ski-racks, 3500 watt sub-woofers, nipple lights, etc.) that the cows almost collapse under the weight and/or embarrassment. The herd are all tragically killed in a massive pile-up while their owners are attempting to perform donuts by the Towers.

LEBANONISM: You have two cows. One is owned by Syria and the other is controlled by the government.

LIBERALISM: You have two cows. You sell both to the rich. The government then taxes the rich one cow and gives it to the poor.

LIBERALISM: You have two cows. You give away one cow and get the government to give you a new cow. Then you give them both away.

LIBERTARIANISM: You have two cows. You let them do what they want.

LIBERTARIANISM: Go away. What I do with my cows is none of your business.

MARXISM/LENINISM: The proletarian cows unite and overthrow the bourgeoisie cowherds. The egalitarian democratic cow revolutionary state with the cow party as vanguard disintegrate over time. Marx choked on a veggie-burger before he could explain what happens to the use-value, exchange-value and sign-value of bovine leather.

NAZISM: You have two cows. The government takes both and then shoots you.

NEW DEALISM: You have two cows. The government takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and pours the milk down the sink. The government insists there is a giant storage tank where all the milk goes.

OMANISM: You have three cows. They are all healthy and produce good quality milk for sale at the market. Unfortunately, your son discovers that the money he received at the market can be used to buy beer. Your grand expansion plans for a new high-tech farm are put on hold indefinitely.

PACIFISM: You have two cows. They stampede you.

PEROTISM: You have two cows. You aren't allowed to sell the milk to Mexico.

PLATONISM: You have two cows. You look for two other cows to milk.

PLATONISM: You have a reflection of two perfect cows. Their milk tastes like water. You look for two real cows to milk.

POLITICAL CORRECTNESSISM: You are associated with (the concept of "ownership" is a symbol of the phallocentric, warmongering, intolerant past) two differently aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of nonspecified gender.

PROTECTIONISM: You have two cows. You can't buy a bull from another country.

QATARISM: You have two cows. They've been sitting there for decades and no one realizes that cows can produce milk. You see what Dubai is doing, you go crazy and start milking the heck out of the cows in the shortest time possible. Then you realize no one wanted the milk in the first place.

REDISTRIBUTIONISM: You have two cows. Everyone should have the same amount of cow. The government takes both cows, cuts them up, and spends more than the cows are worth giving everyone a little piece of cow.

SAUDIISM: You have two cows. Since milking the cow involves nipples, the government decides to ban all cows in public. The only method to milk a cow is to have a cow on one side of a curtain and a guy milking the cow on the other side.

SIMPSONISM: Don't have a cow man!

SOCIALISM: You have two cows. The government takes one of them and gives it to your neighbor.

SOCIALISM -- BUREAUCRATIC: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. They are cared for by ex-chicken farmers. You have to take care of the chickens the government took from the chicken farmers. The government gives you as much milk and eggs as the regulations say you should need.

SOCIALISM -- PURE: You have two cows. The government takes them and puts them in a barn with everyone else's cows. You have to take care of all the cows. The government gives you as much milk as you need.

SOCRATIC METHODISM: How many cows do I have? Why?

SURREALISM: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

SURREALISM: You have two aardvarks. The government paints one green and requires you to take harmonica lessons.

TALIBANISM: You have two cows. At first, the government makes them wear burkas, but later shoots them because "they are Hindu religious symbols."

UNITED NATIONISM: You have two cows. France vetoes you from milking them. The United States and Britain veto the cows from milking you. New Zealand abstains.

YEMENISM: You once had a cow. But then it got kidnapped.

Mathematics

2008-02-08T07:42:00.000-08:00

Absolutely amazing!

Beauty of Maths!

1 x 8 + 1 = 9
12 x 8 + 2 = 98
123 x 8 + 3 = 987
1234 x 8 + 4 = 9876
12345 x 8 + 5 = 987 65
123456 x 8 + 6 = 987654
1234567 x 8 + 7 = 9876543
12345678 x 8 + 8 = 98765432
123456789 x 8 + 9 = 987654321

1 x 9 + 2 = 11
12 x 9 + 3 = 111
123 x 9 + 4 = 1111
1234 x 9 + 5 = 11111
12345 x 9 + 6 = 111111
123456 x 9 + 7 = 1111111
1234567 x 9 + 8 = 11111111
12345678 x 9 + 9 = 111111111
123456789 x 9 +10= 1111111111

9 x 9 + 7 = 88
98 x 9 + 6 = 888
987 x 9 + 5 = 8888
9876 x 9 + 4 = 88888
98765 x 9 + 3 = 888888
987654 x 9 + 2 = 8888888
9876543 x 9 + 1 = 88888888
98765432 x 9 + 0 = 888888888

Brilliant, isn't it?

And look at this symmetry:

1 x 1 = 1
11 x 11 = 121
111 x 111 = 12321
1111 x 1111 = 1234321
11111 x 11111 = 123454321
111111 x 111111 = 12345654321
1111111 x 1111111 = 1234567654321
11111111 x 11111111 = 123456787654321
111111111 x 111111111 = 12345678987654321

Now, take a look at this...

101%

>From a strictly mathematical viewpoint:

What Equals 100%?

What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been in situations where someone wants you to

GIVE OVER 100%.

How about ACHIEVING 101%?

What equals 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help

Answer these questions:

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

If:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R- K

8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

And:

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E

11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But:

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E

1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

THEN, look how far the love of Gods will take you:

L-O-V-E-O-F-G-O-D-S

12+15+22+5+15+6+7+15+4 = 101%

Therefore, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that:

While Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will
Get you there, It's the Love of Gods that will put you over the top!

Lessons of Life

2008-02-07T19:05:00.000-08:00

http://SivaInfoSystems.blogspot.com

Girl's Diary v/s Boy's Diary

2008-01-09T05:07:00.000-08:00

HER DIARY

Day night, I thought he was acting weird.

We had made plans to meet at a cafe to have some coffee.

I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late, but he made no comment.
Conversation wasn't flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk, he agreed but he kept quiet and absent.I asked him what was wrong - he said, "Nothing."I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.

On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior; I don't know why he didn't say,

"I love u, too."When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched TV.

He seemed distant and absent.Finally I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came to bed. I decided that I could not take it anymore, so I decided to confront him with the situation but he had fallen asleep.I started crying and cried until I too fell asleep. I don't know what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.

HIS DIARY

Today India lost the cricket match against Pakistan .

GODDAMN IT.

NOW that's called Simplicity of Men Vs Complexity of Women !!!

Visits

2007-12-07T18:16:00.000-08:00

When Chinese President visited USA

and when USA President visited China

Facts :)

2007-08-04T02:06:00.000-07:00

Three Feelings:

What's the difference between Stress, Tension and Panic?
Stress is when Wife is pregnant,
Tension is when Girlfriend is pregnant,
Panic is when Both are pregnant.

Chinese Adam & Eve:
If Adam and Eve were Chinese we would still be in Paradise because they would have Ignored the Apple and eaten the Snake

Plan For Future:
Teacher asks children, what do u wish 2 do in future?

Ram: I want 2 b a pilot
Vinod: I want 2 b a doctor
Deepa: I want 2 b a good mother
Ravi:I want 2 help Deepa

Liar:
A man was dying because of Cancer.
His son asked him, "Dad, why do u keep telling people u'r dying of AIDS?"
Answer: "So when I'm dead no one will dare touch u’r mom"

Exams are like GIRL FRIENDS
· Too Many Questions
· Difficult to Understand
· More Explanation is Needed
· Result is always FAIL!

Equation:
7 Glance = 1 Smile
7 Smile = 1 Meeting
7 Meeting = 1 Kiss
7 Kisses = 1 Proposal
7 Proposal = 1 Marriage

And that 1 Marriage has 7777777777777 Problems….. So, Beware of Glance(s)!

INDIA - Still Developing Country!

2007-07-31T02:53:00.000-07:00

Ant & Grasshopper

The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The Grasshopper thinks the Ant is a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.
Come winter,the Ant is warm and well fed. The Grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.

Modern Version
The Ant works hard in the withering heat all summer building its house and laying up supplies for the winter.

The Grasshopper thinks the Ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering Grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the Ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering Grasshopper next to a video of the Ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.

The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor Grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the Ant's house.

Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other Grasshoppers demanding that Grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.

Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticizes the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the Grasshopper.

The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the Grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance).

Opposition MPs stage a walkout. Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a Judicial Enquiry.

CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing Ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among Ants and Grasshoppers.

Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.

Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the 'Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act' [POTAGA], with effect from the beginning of the winter.

Arjun Singh makes 'Special Reservation ' for Grasshoppers in Educational Institutions & in Government Services.

The Ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes,it's home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the Grasshopper in a ceremony covered by NDTV.

Arundhati Roy calls it 'A Triumph of Justice'.

Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice '.

CPM calls it the 'Revolutionary Resurgence of the Downtrodden '

Koffi Annan invites the Grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.

Many years later...

The Ant has since migrated to the US and set up a multi-billion dollar company in Silicon Valley .

100s of Grasshoppers still die of starvation despite reservation somewhere in India ...

As a result of loosing lot of hard working Ants and feeding the Grasshoppers, India is still a developing country!!

It's a joke spread around in Internet. The author did not take responsibility in any manner to the persons mentioned & parties indicated. Take it as a joke, but I feel have some good message to pass over, so I added :)

Resmi Gopakumar's Picture Collection

2007-07-11T20:46:00.000-07:00

Boys & Girls

2007-06-27T01:38:00.001-07:00

Six Answers given by different girls when get proposed...

1) No..
2) I need some time..
3) I have always seen you as a friend..
4) Already have a boyfriend..
5) We should concentrate on studies..
6) U don’t even know me properly! It’s just an infatuation...!!

Six Answers given by different boys when get proposed...

1) Yes..
2) Yes..
3) Yes..
4) Yes..
5) Yes..
6) Yes..!!

ഒരു പാ‍ചകകുറിപ്പ്

2007-06-27T01:33:00.001-07:00

ആര്‍ക്കും വളരെ എളുപ്പത്തില്‍ പാകം ചെയ്യാവുന്ന ഒരു പാ‍ചകകുറിപ്പ്

അഹങ്കാരം നുറുക്കിയത്- 2 കി.ഗ്രാം
പൊങ്ങച്ചം പുറന്തോട് മാറ്റിയത്- 500 ഗ്രാം
കുശുമ്പ് ചെറുതായി അരിഞ്ഞത്- 100 ഗ്രാം
ചമ്മല്‍ വറുത്തരച്ചത്- ആവശ്യത്തിന്
വിമ്മിഷ്ടം നന്നായി പൊടിച്ചത്- 50 ഗ്രാം
അസൂയ പൊരിച്ചെടുത്തത്- 1 കി.ഗ്രാം
ധാര്‍ഷ്ട്യം തൊണ്ടോടു കൂടിയത്- 10 എണ്ണം
നാണമില്ലായ്മ -10 ഗ്രാം, തലക്കനം, തലയോട് കൂടിയത്- 3 എണ്ണം
പിരിമുറുക്കം, മുറുക്കം കളയാതെ സംസ്ക്കരിച്ചത്- 100 ഗ്രാം
കൊലച്ചതി, വട്ടത്തില്‍ അരിഞ്ഞത്- 12 എണ്ണം
മുരള്‍ച്ച, ചവിട്ടിത്തേച്ചത്- 1 കി.ഗ്രാം, തെറിവിളി, ഉണക്കി വരട്ടിയത്- 1 കി.ഗ്രാം
നെടുവീര്‍പ്പ്, ആവിയില്‍ വേവിച്ചത്- 50 ഗ്രാം
ദീര്‍ഘനിശ്വാസം, നിശ്വാസം കളഞ്ഞത്- 10 ഏണ്ണം
മുറവിളി, വിളിയോടു കൂടിയത്- ഒരു വായില്‍ കൊള്ളുന്നത്
വൈരാഗ്യം, രാഗി മിനുക്കിയത്- ഒരു ടീസ്പൂണ്‍
കാലുവാരല്‍, കാലുനീക്കി ഉലര്‍ത്തിയത്- ആവശ്യത്തിലധികം
പുച്ഛം, തൊലി കളഞ്ഞത്- ഒരു ടേബില്‍ സ്പൂണ്‍

English to German in Easy steps

2007-06-26T05:27:00.000-07:00

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter. There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where! more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as
replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

26 Things That A Perfect Guy Would Do!

2007-06-26T05:20:00.000-07:00

1. Know how to make you smile when you are down .

2. Try to secretly smell your hair , but you always notice.

3. Stick up for you, but still respects your independence.

4. Give you the remote control during the game.

5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you.

6. Play with your hair .

7. His hands always find yours.

8. Be cute when he really wants something.

9. Offer you plenty of massages.

10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork.

11. Never run out of love.

12. Be funny, but know how to be serious.

13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be serious.

14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready.

15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually hurts.

16. Smile a lot.

17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it means a lot to you.

18. Appreciate you.

19. Help others out.

20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1.

21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you depart from each others company, even when his friends are watching.

22. Sing, even if he can't.

23. Have a creative sense of humor.

24. Stare at you.

25. Call for no reason.

26. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just because he loves u that much to quit it.

Easy ........................... Difficult

2007-06-26T05:10:00.000-07:00

Easy is to get a place in someone's address book.
Difficult is to get a place in someone's heart.

Easy is to judge the mistakes of others
Difficult is to recognize our own mistakes

Easy is to talk without thinking
Difficult is to refrain the tongue

Easy is to hurt someone who loves us.
Difficult is to heal the wound...

Easy is to forgive others
Difficult is to ask for forgiveness

Easy is to set rules.
Difficult is to follow them...

Easy is to dream every night.
Difficult is to fight for a dream...

Easy is to show victory.
Difficult is to assume defeat with dignity...

Easy is to admire a full moon.
Difficult to see the other side...

Easy is to stumble with a stone.
Difficult is to get up...

Easy is to enjoy life every day.
Difficult is to give it real value...

Easy is to promise something to someone.
Difficult is to fulfill that promise...

Easy is to say we love.
Difficult is to show it every day...

Easy is to criticize others.
Difficult is to improve oneself...

Easy is to make mistakes.
Difficult is to learn from them...

Easy is to weep for a lost love.
Difficult is to take care of it so as not to lose it.

Easy is to think about improving.
Difficult is to stop thinking it and put it into action...

Easy is to think bad of others
Difficult is to give them the benefit of the doubt...

Easy is to receive
Difficult is to give

Easy is to read this
Difficult is to follow it

Easy is to keep a friendship with words
Difficult is to keep it with meanings.

Military in China!

2007-06-26T04:40:00.001-07:00

Beautiful China! :) & Military :: India should also have Military such like this & Military Service should be mandatory to every citizen. That will bring discipline among youth and also ready for action!

Resmi Gopakumar's collection!

2007-06-22T05:28:00.000-07:00

Fill in the Blanks

2007-06-21T00:01:00.001-07:00

Chummaaa neram kittumpol.....
poorippichu kalikkuka

Q1. Ee forest nirachum ___________ .
a) Poovanallo b) Marangalanallo c) Kaadanallo

Q2. Da da da Mandan ____________ nee enne kooduthal Mandan aakkam ennu
vicharikkenda
a) Konappi b) Kunjappi c) Mara manda

Q4. "Aa Raathri" - kku enthu patti?
a) Olichu poyi b) Maanjupoyi c) Chathanju poyi

Q5. __________ aliyaa...
a)Machambi b) Thambi c) Chattambi

Q6. I am Jackie , _______Alias Jackie
a) Shekar b) Sarkar c) Sagar

Q7. Ennennum _________ ettante...
a) Kannu b) Mookku c) Pallu

Q8. Innenikku _____ kuthan, sandhyayil chaalicha sindhooram.Enthu
kuthan?
a) Kathi b) Mottusoochi c) Pottu

Q9. Just _________ that
a) December b) Remember c) Forget

Q10. Athu manassilavan sense undavanam sensibility undavanam _____
undavanam
a) Creativity b) Atrocity c) Sensitivity

Q11. Mohan Thomasinte uchishtavum ___ um Kootikuzhachu
a) Uchakanji b) Amedhyam c) Bhrushtam

Q12. Maanasa ________ varoo...
a) Kaakke b) Pooche c) Myne

He n She

2007-06-20T23:34:00.000-07:00

The problems with "HE" as thought by "SHE"

If u TREAT him nicely, he says u are IN LOVE with him;
If u Don't, he says u are PROUD.

If u DRESS Nicely, he says u are trying to LURE him;
If u Don't, he says u are from VILLAGE.

If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN ;
If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS .

If u are SMARTER than him, he'll lose FACE;
If he's Smarter than u, he is GREAT.

If u don't Love him, he tries to POSSESS u;
If u Love him! , he will try to LEAVE u.(very true huh?)

If u don't MAKE LOVE with him., he says u DON'T LOVE him;
If u DO!! He says u are CHEAP.

If u tell him your PROBLEM, he says u are TROUBLESOME;
If u DON'T, he says that u don't TRUST him.

If u SCOLD him, u are like a NANNY to him;
If he SCOLDS u, it is because he CARES for u.

If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED;
If he BREAKS his, he is FORCED to do so.

If u SMOKE, u are BAD girl;
If he SMOKES, he is GENTLEMAN.

Titanic Orkut

2007-06-19T21:20:00.000-07:00

Every time in my orkutI see you. I scrap you.
That is how I know you go on.
Far across the Scrap Book
And testimonials between us
You have come to show yourself “ single”.
Near, far, wherever you areI believe that
the friends list does go on
Once more you logged on
And you're here in my scrap book
And my scrap book will go on and on
Testimonials can touch us one time
And last for sometime
And never let go till we're friends
Love was when I saw your friends list
One true time I hold to
In my life I’ll surely view her/his profile
Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the friends list does go on
Once more you logged on
And you're here in my scrap book
And my scrap book will go on and on
There is some amazing profile that will not
go awayYou're here, there's so much to fear,
And I know that my friend will know
I checked her/him out
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my friends list
And my friends list will go ..

Titanic Orkut!

C Program

2007-06-07T18:45:00.000-07:00

* Program to Propose a girl*/
#include
#include
#define Cute beautiful_lady

main()
{
goto college;
scanf("100%",&ladies);

if(lady ==Cute)
line++;
while( !reply )
{

printf("I Love U");

scanf("100%",&reply);

}

if(reply == "GAALI")
main(); /* go back and repeat the process */

else if(reply == "SANDAL ")
exit(1);

else if(reply == "I Love U")
{
lover =Cute ;
love = (heart*)malloc(sizeof(lover));
}

goto restaurant;

restaurant:
{
food++;
smile++;
pay->money = lover->money;
return(college);
}

if(time==2.30)
goto cinema;

cinema:
{
watch++;
if(intermission)
{
coke++;
Popecorn++;

}
}

if(time ==6.00)
goto park;
}
}
after this think ur self!!!!!!!!

Co-incidence?

2007-06-06T05:02:00.000-07:00

INCREDIBLE THINGS HAPPEN IN AMERICA..

1) Fold a NEW PINK $20 bill in half...

2) Fold again, taking care to fold it exactly as below

3) Fold the other end, exactly as before

4) Now, simply turn it over...

What a coincidience! A simple geometric fold creates a catastrophic premonition printed on all $20 bills!!!

COINCIDENCE? YOU DECIDE

As if that wasn't enough ... here is what you've seen...

Firstly The Pentagon on fire...

Then The Twin Towers...

... And now ... look at this!

TRIPLE COINCIDENCE ON A SIMPLE $20 BILL

You can Do it!

2007-06-06T04:46:00.000-07:00

Not Every Tree can Stand Thirst

But the Cactus Did it.

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Not Every Animal can Represent a Nation

But the Lion Did it.

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Not Every Flower Can Represent Love

But Roses Did it.

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Not Every Monkey Can Read this

But You Did it !!!!! Congrats!!