Dead Rodent Typing

Google Foundation Creates 100 Million Prize For First Human Turd On The Moon

2011-07-22T11:15:00.000-07:00

Man Intends To Start Batman Fan Forum So That He Can Ban People From It

2011-06-26T11:04:00.000-07:00

Christianity Means Delaying Heavenly Bliss As Long As Possible, Provided That It Does Not Involve Socialized Medicine

2011-05-25T12:49:00.000-07:00

#christianity

Oprah Fans Able To Watch Oprah Watching The Oprah Network

2011-05-25T12:29:00.000-07:00

I Am So Above-Average It Would Blow Your Fucking Mind

2011-05-22T11:22:00.000-07:00

HEADLINES: Gay People Approve Of Presbyterians

2011-05-11T10:49:00.000-07:00

#gay

#presbyterian

Cheney Distorts Information Regarding Size & Location Of His 8:48 AM Bowel Movements

2011-05-04T18:06:00.000-07:00

It has been reported by noted investigative reporter Seymour Hersch of The New Yorker that Dick Cheney has not been releasing fecal material of the size he has claimed. In addition, Mr. Hersch reported that the location of the released material is not, as he has claimed in many interviews, his toilet. "In fact, anonymous sources have revealed to me that it is coming out of his mouth. No one can be sure as to the precise cause of this bizarre and mysterious malady; however, it appears to have reached epidemic proportions in former members of the Bush Administration." When asked for comment, a senior official at the NIH (who refused to allow himself to be identified) said, "Well I can only speculate, but I've heard that swallowing too many lies can make you vomit, so maybe it can have a laxative effect as well."

Hello, Would You Like To Sign Up For A Newsletter Full Of Pointless Drivel?

2011-04-04T10:47:00.000-07:00

#newsletter

"Elizabeth Taylor Really Dead This Time," Says Ash Williams

2011-03-25T18:01:00.000-07:00

#elizabethtaylor

Elizabeth Taylor Was Alive Until Quite Recently, It Turns Out

2011-03-23T07:14:00.000-07:00

#elizabethtaylor

From Now On Kathy Griffin Will Only Be Addressed As 'The Griffinator'

2011-03-17T12:35:00.000-07:00

#kathygriffin

I Validate Your World-View But You Should Be Aware That I Am Looking For Bomb Designs On The Internet

2011-02-21T10:33:00.000-08:00

2011-02-13T11:11:00.000-08:00

In Unexpected Move, Christian Organization Attempts To Live Up To Ideals Of Christ

"Unitarians turn tragedy into lesson in tolerance." (Washington Post)

AOL Buys Huffington Post With 50 Billion Unopened CD-ROMs

2011-02-07T08:45:00.000-08:00

Area Blogger Bitching About Everything That's Wrong With The World On His Blog For Some Goddamn Reason

2011-02-05T11:08:00.000-08:00

Afghanistan Bribery Commission Reports Serious Underpayment Of Bribes

2011-01-16T12:34:00.000-08:00

Idaho Man Proud That He Does Not Know What Planet He's On

2011-01-08T09:10:00.000-08:00

Blake Edwards Dead: Still No Refunds For Movie-goers Who Paid To See "Switch"

2010-12-17T10:32:00.000-08:00

Alternate Universe Steve Martin Opens In Branson, Promises Arrow-through-the-head Gag 'Nightly'

2010-12-10T08:51:00.000-08:00

"Wrong Sanchez" Not A Filthy Joke

2010-12-07T09:39:00.000-08:00

The Wrong Sanchez Shows Up for the Jets - NYTimes.com

Death Panels Are Back, Baby!

2010-12-02T19:39:00.000-08:00

Arizona Cuts Organ Transplants From Budget

Scientists Regretfully Reveal Possibility Of Inedible Arsenic-based Aliens

2010-12-02T13:16:00.000-08:00

Airborne Introduces New Daily Anti-HIV, Anti-Malarial, Anti-Tuberculosis, Anti-Leprosy PIll

2010-11-23T11:29:00.000-08:00

Will A Holland Man Someday Write The Great Hollandaise Novel?

2010-10-16T13:20:00.000-07:00

HEADLINES: Malicious Software Insulting To Industry

2010-09-25T09:10:00.000-07:00