House of a Thousand Pizzas

Ha!

2011-01-31T14:16:00.001-08:00

Well, it finally happened. I quit. woohoo!

We're out...

2010-10-02T11:07:00.000-07:00

So I'm out and about with the little lady. We decide we are going to go spend some time with my family. My family is kinda strange. If you bribe them with food they won't eat your face off. So I suggest we stop by House of a Thousand Pizzas to get some food for them. I can get some great deals there. So I walk in to a mess in the dining room. I ignore it because I am going to carry out. I go back and start putting my order in. We are out of regular dough. Well that's fine I'll get thick and just discount it down. Nope we are out. So the pizza joint is out of pizza. Great times. I just left, I didn't want to walk into the back and start yelling at people wondering why the pizza store is out of pizzas and why no new dough was getting made. Scary stuff.

Yo Mamma

2010-09-29T23:14:00.000-07:00

Jimmy and Wonder Boy almost come to blows the other night. Not fun. I guess they were both having bad days. I didn't care I was leaving in 30 minutes let #2 deal with it. They ended up both getting heavily disciplined and told if they are rude or yell at any other employee or make any more threatening remarks they are canned. The Boss Lady was catching me up to speed on the situation when Luigi heard this. He double checked that this was true. Boss Lady said yes. Them We watched dumbfounded and horrified as he walked right up to Wonder Boy and asked him if it was true. All Wonder Boy did was nod. Then Luigi started ripping on him with Yo mamma jokes.

Aliens and CNN

2010-09-29T23:09:00.000-07:00

The other day started out being a good day. Well being a good day minus the waking up. Oh and minus the going to work. Well... there was that whole understaffed thing also. Ok, ok, so it wasn't much of a good day. I did however realize where my first mistake of the day was. Wonder Boy walked into the store. I, without thinking, asked him how he was doing. I know, I know stupid me. He said he was doing fine, and that aliens were invading the nuclear power plants. Well, at this point I think any semi-sane person would go drown themselves for opening up their ear to be raped by his ignorance but i was feeling froggy, which leads me to my second mistake of the day. I asked him how he cam to that conclusion. He told me without missing a beat that CNN told him. Sometimes I wonder why I can't put employees through the oven, or give them baths in the fryer.

What a Trooper

2010-09-17T15:37:00.000-07:00

So yeah, Frankie gets an honorable mention. He went to the hospital this morning. He was diagnosed with tonsillitis, then went home, got dressed, and is here at work now. He is now waiting tables. What a trooper, he is stumbling around in a circle mumbling about hating certain boss people. What a trooper, I might try and send him home once I clock in.

Credits

2010-09-17T15:29:00.000-07:00

Customer called in wanting to talk to a manager about why he only has a $10 credit on his account. I took the call and looked up the history. The Boss Lady put a credit on his account for wrong toppings on a pizza. He was telling me it was because his whole order was late and it should be for the whole order amount. Um... The Boss Lady doesn't give credits for pizzas being 'late.' I told him nope, its 10 dollars. He placed an order, I took it. I figured it was done. He called back stating the pizza was wrong. I asked him what he got and he said it was suppose to have pepperoni on the whole thing it only had half. Ok, that's what you ordered. That I why I read the order back to you. Then it changed to it doesn't have certain toppings. And then it changed to i could go @#$% myself.
This might seem like a weird concept, but House of a Thousand Pizzas is a business and we sell pizzas to make money. Yes... that is correct ladies and gentlemen, we are trying to make money. We are not giving food away for free. It costs money. Maybe one day people will realize this and start paying for their food without undue complaints.

Randomness

2010-09-16T13:44:00.000-07:00

The other day was a bit interesting. I wasn't feeling well so I was more prone to wandering around aimlessly. I saw a few things that stuck with me through the sickly haze.
I saw a woman walk across our parking lot. This is not strange in itself. What was strange about it is that she was rapidly tapping her glass eye the entire time. How do I know it was a glass eye you ask? The answer is easy... I could hear it clinking 25 to 30 yards away.
A lady came in and asked if she could dig through our trash looking for cans. Ok... so why would you look through our dumpsters when we don't sell canned products. All our beverages are bottled. Sure go right ahead. Have fun!
The Boss Lady's new boss has decided that Lisa is going to train all our cooks from now on. *twitch* The same Lisa that cost us over 300 dollars in food cost in one week. The same Lisa who can't keep up on a Tuesday night because "we are to busy" (For those playing the home game, Tuesday nights are one of our slowest nights for Pizza. They are so slow in fact that we do a Buffet that night to try and raise business.) Sometimes I wish it was legal to carry a concealed shovel.

Did She Really?

2010-09-12T02:53:00.000-07:00

So I had to deliver a pizza or two today due to business being more than expected. Before I left I put up a prep list for my drivers. This lets them know what dough to set out so it is ready for me tomorrow morning when I open. When I come back notice #2 has taken my list down and is putting her own up. Not only did this happen but the numbers were screwed all to poop. A few minutes later I was going to be petty and rip it down and put my own back up when I realized something else. She had put my name on the list and was assigning me to do dough prep, instead of the fun loving manager stuff that I'm paid to do. Now, if we are short handed I don't mind doing the work. No problem there. But we had 5 drivers in the building and not all of their names were on her 'list'. The other thing about this as she had me doing some 9 inch deep dish, which we are out of. just two 6 inch ones.... 2 another driver is doing 20 of them, but she wants me to do 2..... and take some packs of thin crust out of the freezer. I wonder if it was petty of me to rip that off the wall and throw it away. Not real sure. I don't think so though.

Excuse Me?

2010-09-12T02:45:00.000-07:00

So I was standing beside The Boss Lady when #2 came up to us. She looked at the Boss lady and stated the following. "Listen, when it says paid on the compute I need it up front." Now this statement doesn't seem to mean much, but it was said with such disrespect that one of the employee near us bolted as soon as she said it. I looked at Boss Lady to make a comment but I saw her face. Her face went from confusion, to shock, to 'I'm going to rip someone's face off'. I didn't say anything, I bolted also. A few minutes later I looked over at Boss Lady to make my comment, my comment got choked off as I saw the hatred she was putting into cutting the pizza she was working on. I thought she was going to cut through the table. I've never seen the Boss Lady look that angry before. Someone is going to get a shovel, I am pretty sure of it.

A Great Rolemodel

2010-09-10T15:33:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting here in A House of a Thousand Pizzas waiting to clock in. I just happen to look over to see #2 carrying drinks all sorts of wrong to a table. This normally wouldn't bother me that much, but she is also training a new employee who is watching. Just grand, I'm going to have to wipe the new persons mind clear to get them trained correctly. Just friggen great.

Why

2010-09-10T11:28:00.001-07:00

One question.
Why am I working on my three year anniversary with my fiance when I put in to have today off two months ago?

Smooth Criminal

2010-09-10T11:27:00.000-07:00

One of my lovely employees I think has the record for having the cops called on them while at work. Not real sure how that works but we had to move them to driver from server to keep bad things from happening. I get a call from a customer the other day, telling me that my smooth criminal got in a disagreement (straight yelling match) with her pregnant sister about parking issues. Then came up to the door step still yelling and that she just had surgery on her leg and argued with them on her front door step. And on her way out slammed their fence door into the car leaving a large dent. Great When Smooth Criminal comes in I pull them outside and ask them what happened. The stories are similar, except that if the sister is pregnant she just found out today because she looked like a skinny crack head. and there is no way a fence could have hit the car because the car was parked on the side of the road. And She said she had an attitude, yes, but wasn't screaming or yelling. And that they didn't even pay for the pizza, some mexican guy did, and even tipped a few dollars. Why did they want credits on their accounts? I love some customers, I really do.

A Fun Loving Customer

2010-09-10T11:19:00.000-07:00

So I get a call about some too thin bad tasting calzones. Great, no problem, let me make two new ones for you and send them right out. I get a call later saying these are too thick. At this point I know that there is nothing I can do to please them. They ate half of the first ones, more than likely half of these and they just want a free meal. I let em know that at this point I'm can't send any more food to them tonight. And what I'll do is I'll forward their information to the Boss Lady to either get a credit on their account or to refund them their money. I am not capable of doing either tonight. He tells me he is on his way. A little bit later he shows up and rips open his meal on the front counter screaming at me "Would you eat this $#*!?" No sir, your hands have been all over it. I still can't make any more for you, and I'm not giving your refund tonight. He threatened to come across the counter. I threatened to let him, and picked up the phone and said they can either leave with that answer, or the cops can come in and nothing will get done. I step into the back to talk to Boss Lady one more time before they go. And she tells me to just give them their money and let them go. Bleh

Brotha from Anotha Motha

2010-09-08T19:22:00.000-07:00

Wonder Boy kept running into a repairman today. Over and over he bounced into this guy. At one point I apologized and his words were, "That's fine, its nothing a shovel to the face won't fix." I wonder if we were friends in a past life.

Holding Hands

2010-09-08T19:19:00.000-07:00

You would think that someone working for House of a Thousand Pizzas for over two years should be able to run a shift. You would think that anyways. You would think that they wouldn't throw a little temper tantrum when you wont stay and wash dishes. At least not stay and do so when there are no deliveries, no pizzas to make, and 5 drivers, 2 cooks, a server and a phone person, all standing around scratching their ~~balls~~ heads. I wonder if I should get a raise for having to hold an 'equals' hand. Bleh, just give me 4 hours with the shovel and no consequences and I'll fix all our issues.

Obviously

2010-09-08T19:12:00.000-07:00

Great interview today. Just great times had by all. I started by questioning availability, he responded by saying he couldn't work weekend nights due to being a musician. That's just grand, but that's what I'm hiring for, but lets carry on. So a few questions later, I asked him my favorite question, Why should I hire you over everyone else. His answer was the absolute best answer I have ever heard.
"Obviously you shouldn't."
Wow... at least he was honest.

Murphy Must Hate Me

2010-09-07T23:05:00.000-07:00

For those of you playing the home game, Murphy's Law states the following- If something can go wrong, it will. Today Murphy was sitting on my shoulder wacking it in my ear. The Boss Lady's new boss was supposed to come in and do an inspection. Sure lets show up during my shift. Whats that? You said lets show up in the middle of my lunch rush. Oh, you're not done yet? You want to show up when I am two people short? Oh, Those 50 cases of Pepsi Max that came in 30 min ago need to find a home before the store opens? Oh wow, that's just great. Oh how awesome is that I get to work again on my anniversary. Your bringing in someone to train for a position you've been promising me since March. Man, That's just friggin awesome. Sometimes I just want to flip the make table and set the oven on fire. Oh yeah, the oven that pizzas get stuck in when your not paying attention to. Stupid friggen job.

Like an Ice Pick in the Ear

2010-09-07T22:53:00.000-07:00

We had a managers meeting the other day at House of a Thousand Pizzas. It started all well and good. The Boss Lady said it was going to be a one sided meeting, and it started out that way and all was good. As least it started good. Then #2 started speaking, and it just went downhill. Her excuses seemed to center around, "This store is in the Ghetto and I don't belong here." I have to be real careful with what I say about certain people. I just wish I had the shovel that day. For those of you playing the home game, Madison, TN is not the ghetto. It is not even close to the ghetto. It does have a large population of ignorant individuals. By the end of the meeting I just wanted to stick ice picks in my ears to get the sound of #2's voice out of my head. Ugh

Almost Made It

2010-09-05T20:08:00.000-07:00

Almost. I almost made it. I was so friggen close to going a whole shift without any huge problems. It was going to be great. But then I realized who was coming in. At four I walked up to my server and made a bet with him. I bet a nickle that #2 would come in early, clock in without asking (ruining my hard earned awesome labor) Then start counting money(taking 30 min to do so.) So at four thirty the above mentioned started happening. I have to call my labor in at 2, 5, and 8. At 5 I called Boss Lady and informed her of labor and the bet. Not even before I get off the phone #2 starts telling me to clock out early to save labor. That's fine, I did. Then I sat in the dining room and watched the kitchen go to hell. No one was helping the lady in the front. Pizzas started to get baked up in the oven, burning, Chaos erupted, and it was funny as could be. So, off the clock I started barking orders, while telling #2 to fix herself. It looked like things were fixed. So I left. #2 comes out after me and asks me if Little Guy was fired today. He wasn't because I was talking about giving him a few extra hours. #2 said she called looking for him and his mom answered saying that he told her he was fired. Apparently someone lied to mommy and is going to get a spanking,
And I almost made it out the door with nothing happening. So so so so close. I only have a small managers meeting tomorrow maybe I can get out without a small nuclear bomb going off.

Off Work

2010-09-04T10:09:00.000-07:00

I'm am off tonight. Woot!!! So I will pose a question. I want answers to this people because it almost sparked a fight last night. If a server, who makes 2.30 cents an hour plus tips, (if they don't make min wage we supplement their pay so they make at least 7.25)goes over to the carry-out window hands a customer their pizza and gets a tip should they keep the tip, or give it to the cook/cut table person. I have worked as both a cook and a server. Even as a server I personally gave the money to the cook. Now if i get one and i am the cook I stock pile it in my pocket of holding and use it to pay for my employees meals when they need some help, or other things of the like. Or I use it in the slaw game up front. That thing is as addicting as crack I swear. Now I leave the decision up to that person who got the tip. Here are both arguments.
Server- They have to deal with the customers. They only get paid 2.30 an hour +tips from their tables. (+supp pay if needed)
Cook- They don't feel that that person did anything to deserve that tip. The cook is the second hardest position in the store. the also only make 7.25.

The last part of the question. What about just a phone answering person who makes 7.25 an hour standing in the window. Should they keep it or give it to the cook.
You guys decide.

Who Dat?

2010-09-04T10:01:00.000-07:00

Wonder Boy was laughing to himself... again. This time the people in the dining room were getting a little discomforted by it. I look over at him and snap "Its not funny" He didn't realize that I had said it. He head snapped up and he started looking around, but never said anything. I think he was trying to find out if that was a new voice in his head. I think I'll try sneaking up on him one day and tell him to pull the trigger, or jump, or something else equally mean. All for academical reasons of course.

Slap That MFer

2010-09-04T09:58:00.000-07:00

This one has a lot of moving parts behind the curtains that someone could actually lose their job over. I'm just going to skip to the funny stuff.
A lady comes in wanting to talk to a manager. I'm the only manager in and I am yelling at my people for loosing a bunch of pizzas. (Pizzas that leave the store in over 20 minutes affect my score, and are considered 'lost') I come up front and the first thing she does is apologize for the cursing that is about to happen. She tells me that she isn't mad at me, she isn't mad at the person who cooked her pizza. She also pointed at the two people on either side of me and said she wasn't mad at them. She said that she was mad at that MFer who took her order and the same one that hung up on her. She also stated that she was about to come across the counter and slap him straight across the face for getting smart with her and she thinks it is....drum roll please... Wonder Boy. She pointed over to him standing by drive through laughing to himself. I guess that gave him away. The two people on either side of me stepped aside more than happy to let her. Long story short I made her happy and she left not wanting a 'corporate number' or her money back. Although I did tell her she could come in and slap him around any time she would like.

The Driver Knows

2010-09-04T09:50:00.000-07:00

One of my hardest working drivers, Luigi came up to me last night and made a very serious comment. He said that he doesn't mind taking a pizza to a house that another driver can't find. He doesn't even mind doing it when they ave driven around for an hour and blown any chance of a tip possible. He does have a problem with this when they point at the map and tell him where he is going. I love my employees.

What Were You Thinking?

2010-09-03T01:06:00.000-07:00

Customer called today complaining about their service last night. They said they had to wait two and a half hours to get their food. And once they finally got it they said it was cold and nasty. They also wanted to know why the manager on duty, (#2) told them that the reason their pizza was late was that someone left in the middle of their shift without telling anyone.
2 things about this that upset me.
1-Why would you tell a customer anything other than "Sorry let me make this better."
2-No that person didn't, it was 'me' that left because I'm not going to stay and hold another manager's hand. If they can't handle a shift they need to go. That's it, just go.

Laughter is the Best Cure

2010-09-03T00:46:00.000-07:00

Wonder Boy really amazes me. Here is one of his stories tonight.
The 'Big Pizza' pans have to be specially seasoned. It took us a week to cook the seasoning into the pans. Tonight the Boss Lady caught Wonder Boy scraping the seasoning off all the pans with a knife. She took him aside and explained what it was, why it was there, and to leave it alone. Ten minutes later, she hears the scraping sound again, and he is now scraping with a spatula instead of a knife. The Boss Lady now realizes that this is a loosing battle, so she tells him to leave the 'Big Pizza' pans alone and move on to something else. 15 minutes late one of my cooks pull me over to the sink area to settle a dispute between them and Wonder Boy, as he is again scraping the pans. This time I inform him why it is like that, and show him exactly how they need to be cleaned, not realizing that the Boss Lady just had this conversation with him. I go back to work, 10 minutes later I hear the Boss Lady telling Wonder Boy that if he won't listen to just go away and find something else to work on. This behavior I have to come to expect. Where we have to hold our employees hands and baby them. What still throws me for a loop is having to listen to the echoes of cackling laughter coming from the same person, over and over again.
That and whenever he left, the dish area to get something, he would walk backwards. Not real sure why, I didn't think it was worth asking about.