Marilyn's Musings

New Diagnosis - Not a New Condition

2012-01-02T10:52:00.002-06:00

My mother has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. While the diagnosis is new, it has become evident to me that we have been going down this path for many years. The doctors finally told us what we refused to see.

The first symptoms appeared not long after my daddy and brother died in November of 2003. I have spent the years since explaining away her behavior. She spent those same years covering her increasing inabilities. My frustration was only exceeded by her own. The diagnoses came when I could no longer offer excuses and she could no longer cover. I have entered a new kind of grief with the realization that she will never be better.

But in church this morning, I experienced hope. Mother reached for the pew Bible and began looking for Psalm 23 with the rest of the congregation. I did not offer to help as previous attempts had embarrassed her but I watched while she was in Psalms, then not, then back again. She could not find the scripture before time to read. My heart ached. With my Bible in hand we stood and the preacher read. Immediately I heard Mother, in a whispered voice, quoting the twenty-third Psalm as the preacher read. Tears rolled down my cheeks and I had a time of personal worship.

I do not understand why she can no longer find scripture in her Bible. I do not understand how she cannot remember how to spell my name or how she can think I am her oldest child. I do not understand how she can no longer do the crossword puzzles she has done my whole life. I do not understand why she does not remember how to crochet or sew or make dressing. I do not understand why she thinks someone will steal her remote control. But I praise God that His Word is embedded deep in her heart so she can still quote scripture. I praise Him for the peace on her face when she remembers and sings those old hymns. If she forgets everything else I do not think she will ever forget Him . . . and praise God, I know He will never forget her!

“Just wait until he says your name!”

2011-12-25T13:50:00.000-06:00

Nancy’s comment was an eager attempt to give me a glimpse of the delight I could look forward to as a grandmother. I was still relatively new in the role and she had a few years experience. Like so many things about being a grandparent, I did not yet understand the magnitude of the words she spoke.

But now . . . Samuel, who just turned one, has eyes that light up with recognition when he sees me. James who is almost two just recently moved from calling me “Naa” to “Nana.” (I love both!) Jonathan, almost three, exclaims “Nana’s here!” when I knock at his door. With each expression of recognition I think my heart will explode.

Last month, I had a birthday. Leah called and while we talked, Jonathan asked for the phone. “Happy Birthday Nana!” he said. No prompting, no suggestions from Mommy, just the heart of a little boy. Silent tears rolled down my face. I have watched these sweet boys move from imitating their parents’ words, to answering questions about “Who’s got you?” to acting on their own recognition and love for me. I am abundantly blessed.

What a peek into God’s heart! We learn to say the name of Jesus, pray at the prompting of a preacher or teacher, and sing praises to Him at church. I think that surely makes God smile. But when we speak His sweet name without prompting, acting on our own recognition and love for Him, oh how it must please Him! I hope so. Happy Birthday Jesus! We love you!

We are all well and pray you are too.

Merry Christmas!

Marilyn and Jerre

JP, Samuel, Leah, Jonathan, Stephen, Kassi and James

Ministry To Me

2011-11-26T16:19:00.001-06:00

I woke up at 6:30 AM each morning while I was in Kenya. Monday was no different except that I woke up with Marian on my mind. Marian, a dear friend, was married to Ed who had been diagnosed with cancer a relatively short time earlier. I believed the Holy Spirit brought them to my mind as a call to prayer and responded obediently. However, as the day went on my thoughts were continually brought back to Marian.

While on a long bumpy van ride on Monday afternoon, I shared my thoughts with Patty, one of the other team members. I told her about our friendship, about his cancer, about my first morning thoughts, and about how I could not get them off my mind. Then I said to her "I guess he really could even die while I am here in Kenya."

A few hours later, we went back to the orphanage. While we were laughing and playing with the children, I got a phone call. Ed had died at 10:30 Sunday night (6:30 Monday morning in Kenya).

I felt a strange mixture of both shock and confirmation of what I already knew and the tears came quickly. I went to a side room to process what I had just learned and was joined by Patty. She offered support. I cried. We prayed.

As my mind returned to things in my presence, I noticed a sweet little girl peering around the corner with a look of concern. Apparently she had done that before and in my grief, I had not noticed. I gathered myself together and returned to where all the children were playing. She came to my side. We did not speak the same language but our hearts did not need words. At that moment, my heart needed compassion and hers wanted to give compassion. While my friends were on the other side of the world grieving together, my great big God ministered to me through an orphan who had experienced way too much pain and loss in her young life. The empathy of that child was like a soft warm blanket that God the Father wrapped around both of us.

Ordinary People

2011-11-11T20:46:00.000-06:00

I love the story in Acts 4 about how the disciples were filled with the Holy Spirit and then experienced life changing power in their lives. It was so obvious that other people saw it! Acts 4:13 says "When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus."

Thirteen ordinary people went to Kenya this summer with courage and direction supplied by the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. Like Peter and John, we found ourselves unable to not speak about Jesus. (Acts 4:20) No matter how unschooled and ordinary we looked, I pray that they knew we had been with Jesus!

Meet our team!

Angela, a mom who looked like the "pied piper" as she imitated animals with the children.

John, a grandaddy who opened his arms to a yard full of orphans starved for affection.

Mitch and Cheryl, a couple who made so many children happy just by taking their picture.

Wynn, a lawyer, who jumped at the chance to speak to a group of Kenyan lawyers.

Patty, who had been corresponding with an orphan in Kenya for years finally got to meet her.

Billy, a layman, who preached with conviction.

Joy, a divorcee, who learned that God's gifts and His call are irrevocable. (Romans 11:29)

David, a brand new believer who took the words of Jesus seriously when He said "go and make disciples of all nations." (Matthew 28:19)

Bryan, a young dad who shared his gift of music with children who will teach other children.

Bob and Suzi were our leaders and the only professionals. They were career missionaries in Japan for years but just can't seem to retire those missionary passports!

And me, the most ordinary of all.

If God can use me, just think what He could do with you!

Women Are The Same Everywhere

2011-10-06T21:41:00.000-05:00

For many years, I have taught Bible to women. It was during those years that God directed me to enroll at New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary and pursue certification in Women's Ministry. I recently finished that certification with the completion of a project entitled Biblical Direction In A Woman's World of Choice. I thoroughly enjoyed researching Biblical Womanhood and was blessed by a group of young moms who traveled with me through the scriptures. We wrestled with some tough issues and reevaluated some life choices that are commonly accepted without question today. We took all questions to the Word of God. God reminded us over and over again that the tremendous love He had for us when He planned for us and created us as women is still as strong as it was then. God who is sovereign knows all, sees all, and can be trusted. His ways are perfect.

Little did I know that in only a few months I would have the opportunity to teach some of those same biblical truths to women in Kenya. When I accepted the assignment to go on the mission trip I did not know what kind of ministry God had planned for us but I was thrilled when I learned there may be an opportunity to minister to women. Not long after that, we then got word that some ladies had requested a Saturday seminar and my excitement increased. So why was I still surprised when one of the ladies at the orphanage sent a list of questions they wanted addressed that could have come from my group of young moms? They were grappling with the same Biblical Womanhood issues. No matter what the language, the economic climate, the culture, or what side of the world we live on, women are still women.

On the outside, the issues that tug at Kenyan women may look different from those that nag us, but at the core they are the same. The good news is that Jesus is also the same. He is the same from Alabama to Kenya. He is the same yesterday, today and forever. He has the answers we seek and at a time when we are confronted with more choices than in the history of women, He offers us biblical direction.

At one point, I stood before the women with my right hand reaching up and my left hand reaching down in an attempt to illustrate Titus 2. I've done that many times. This time I watched in awe as I saw that scripture coming to life before me. We had moved into a question and answer time and the women who said they had previously not even met together for encouragement, transitioned from asking us questions to answering questions for each other. Maybe I could see it because I didn't understand the language and wasn't caught up in the discussion, or maybe it was just because God wanted to bless me with a visual I will never forget. Either way, my heart was full. I love that God understands women. I love that He loves us just as we are, as women. I am glad that I am a woman and He is my God!

The seminar scheduled for ten o'clock until three o'clock finished sometime after five. Isn't that just like women?

Hands

2011-09-14T10:23:00.001-05:00

Last week I took my mother to the hospital for an outpatient test. While we were waiting, I poured some lotion into my hand and realized I had poured too much. I asked my mother if she wanted some and she said yes. I reached for her hands and rubbed them with the excess lotion on my own. It was a sweet moment. Those 83 year old hands had served her family for many years. My heart warmed as I caressed them.

While I was in Kenya, we did a seminar for the ladies. Because of the rustic conditions, there was little opportunity to do any of the feminine activities associated with those type of events in America. What we could do was massage their hands with lotion and polished their nails as they arrived. These ladies were much younger than my mother and even younger than myself, but their hands told of their hard work. I hope it felt good to them. It was nice to see them smile with appreciation and it blessed me to actively "love" the hands that had worked so hard to serve their families.

I like looking at hands. Baby hands, feminine hands, man hands, elderly hands. You can tell so much about a person by looking at their hands and even more by touching their hands.

But the hands I long to see and touch are the hands of Jesus. Those are the hands that have served willingly, loved perfectly, and sacrificed completely. Those are the hands that reached out for me even though I never deserved Him. (Romans 5:8) Even now, the thoughts of His hands bring tears to my eyes. I pray I never get over the awe of His love for me.

I will not forget you!

See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands

Isaiah 49:15b-16a (NIV)

". . . feeling the fragility of life . . ."

2011-09-11T21:52:00.000-05:00

Those were the words someone used today to describe her feelings after 9/11. She lived in Manhattan at the time and her family lived in the surrounding area. They had good reason to feel the fragility of life. I felt it too, all the way in Alabama.

Life is fragile.

Al Marchand was a flight attendant on United Airline Flight 175 when it flew into the World Trade Center south tower on September 11, 2001. Four years earlier he was a policeman and bartender. One night after the bar he worked at closed, someone on the cleaning crew led him to receive Jesus as his Savior. His wife Rebecca also came to know the Lord and told about how Al was a changed man after he believed. He had a passion for sharing his new found faith with others. Al retired from the police force and became a flight attendant thinking the airplane would be a place he could share Jesus. He said to his wife, "What if there is a time when a flight is going down? What if I am the only one who can share the gospel?"

A month before his death, he shared that same vision with a passenger. He told her, "I became a flight attendant so if a plane went down I could have 30-40 seconds to speak the gospel to people so they could receive Christ." Those who knew him are confident that Al shared the gospel with the passengers on the plane that day. God had put that in Al's heart.

Al Marchand's earthly life was fragile but his confidence and passion came from a different place. He had a living faith relationship with Jesus Christ. No terrorist, no storm, no disease can take that away. Oh, I hope you know Jesus! He loves you so much that He died for you. You can trust Him when all else fails. And it will.

If you do know Him, I hope you are inspired like I was by Al Marchand's story. May we not hover in a corner like those with no hope. He has called us, gifted us, and empowered us. What has He put in your heart?

the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give to you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Him, the eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that you may know what is the hope of His calling, what are the riches of the glory of His inheritance in the saints, and what is the exceeding greatness of His power toward us who believe, according to the working of His mighty power which He worked in Christ when He raised Him from the dead and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly places,

(Ephesians 1:17-20)

What The Kenyan Christians Taught Me

2011-09-06T13:02:00.000-05:00

Sunday was our third day of ministry. The team split into four groups and went to different churches. I had the privilege of teaching Sunday School and sharing in worship at one of those churches. The Sunday School class began with the children singing and reading scripture. Each child praised Jesus before sharing.

When the time came for me to teach, my heart was full and I was more than excited to teach about Jesus calming the sea from Mark 4:30-41. I told the children about the tremendous power of our great big God. I told them that even a tiny bit of faith was enough as long as that faith is in Jesus. I said that when we have Jesus in our life we will still go through hard times but we will not go alone. Jesus will be with us in those hard times just like He was with the disciples on the boat. Then we learned the songs "With Jesus In Your Boat" and "My God is So Big." We sang loud with all the motions.

The teacher asked if they had any questions for me and the children responded in Swahili. Shock mixed with confusion flooded my mind when she turned to me and said "They want to know if you are a believer in Jesus Christ."

You see, it is the practiced habit of Christians in Kenya to introduce themselves and voice praise to Jesus before speaking about anything else. Over and over again I had heard the Kenyan believers offer heartfelt praise. The children who shared at school and church did so only after voicing a praise to our great God. In the ladies' group, they introduced themselves and told about their families, but only after praising Jesus. A woman came up to me after the service at Athi River and eagerly reached for my hand. Her face revealed the impact of what her words would tell me. "I love Jesus!" was all she said.

Hearing these praises blessed me tremendously. I loved the openness and the eagerness to confess such an important part of who one is in Christ. But it never occurred to me to do the same. In America we make assumptions about whether or not someone is a believer by what they do or maybe by what they do not do. I have at times wondered what would be the worse scenario: To think someone is not a believer who in fact is, or to think someone is a believer who in fact is not? We have been guilty of doing both. Even still, while I was sharing about Jesus (something I was "doing" that might indicate I was a believer) the children wondered if I knew Him. I was hit with a fresh understanding that just because a person talks about Jesus does not mean they know Jesus!

"Oh sweet children!" I said "Yes! I am a believer in Jesus Christ!" They listened intently while I told them this time, not about Jesus and the disciples, but about Jesus and me.

In case you did not know, I want to state clearly, just as the Kenyans do:

"My name is Marilyn and I am a believer in Jesus Christ."

The Spirit of Your Father Speaks In You

2011-09-01T16:56:00.001-05:00

We were in a van going through Nairobi, Kenya when I found out that I would be telling my testimony that night. There was to be an "open air crusade" at Athi River. One of the men on our team would be preaching and another would be singing. It was an evangelistic meeting for a new church in the town so my conversion testimony was appropriate.

In my mind I pictured a small gathering under a tent like covering. I suppose open air to me meant there would be no sides to the covering. . . but there was no covering! It was truly an "open air" meeting. As I look back, it was exactly what it would be in Kenya. There was a kind of intersection of roads in the town of Athi River. Tall buildings lined one street where people stood on their balconies and roofs but shorter buildings were more numerous. Mothers stood close to their homes with their babies wrapped snugly next to them, and many children played in the street. Occasionally, a car would pass through.

Agape' Church had brought in a stage, a keyboard, and a sound system big enough to be used in a coliseum. Even people inside their homes could hear the praise music clearly and many began moving toward the music.

The time came for me to share my testimony and I made my way to the stage. I told the story of a little girl whose heart was captured by a Savior who loved her enough to die for her. I had never told my testimony in third person and tears tugged at my heart as I confessed that I was that little girl. I had an interpreter who translated my words to Swahili but I was strangely unaware of his presence. While he spoke, God was giving me words. For me, It was an intimate encounter with God. As I left the stage, I left with peace, still feeling the manifest presence of my sweet Savior. I was keenly aware that He had empowered me to speak and that He would use my story because, in fact, it was His story.

I was reading today (here) about how God uses us. He is all sufficient God and He does not need us, but when we make ourselves available to Him, He lets us be a part of what He is doing. That, my friend, is completely awesome!

...do not worry about how or what you are to say; for it will be given you in that hour what you are to say. For it is not you who speak, but it is the Spirit of your Father who speaks in you.
(Matthew 10:19-20 NAS)

Lakini mtakapokamatwa, msihangaike mkifiki ria mtakalosema; kwa maana mtaambiwa la kusema wakati huo. Kwa sababu si ninyi mtakaokuwa mkizungumza bali ni Roho wa Baba yenu atakayekuwa akisema kupitia kwenu.

(Matayo 10:19-20 Swahili New Testament)

Yes, I Have Been To Kenya!

2011-08-29T19:54:00.000-05:00

What an adventure! As we walked out of the airport in Nairobi, I immediately felt the presence of the Holy Spirit. My heart was full and tears came quickly. God had brought me there and I could not wait to see what He was going to do!

I am excited about sharing my adventure with you but for now, I hope you enjoy the little book I made to share my adventure with three little boys.

Is This Just A Fad?

2011-08-26T13:19:00.000-05:00

In March, I began telling people that I was going on a mission trip. Someone said to me, "So many people are going on mission trips. Is this just a fad?"

I had a pain in my heart at the rather cynical question. The truth is, right now, there are many people going on mission trips. Why?

There have been times in my life when I desperately wanted to go on a real mission trip. There was a family mission trip to Mexico that we were not able to join. The possibility of going to Africa came up for me. I prayed, full of both excitement and a little anxiety, but the trip was blocked. So I taught about missions to teenage girls and when I could I went with the church youth on their mission trips.

This past year, God began stirring that desire in me again. I looked at possibilities in Atlanta where there is an international community. I thought about New York City where people groups from all over the world need Christ. I wondered about the possibility of going to Montana or Connecticut. I knew there was always the possibility of going farther but did not think God would want to send me so far away at my age! So I thought about how I had volunteered at Sav-A-Life in the past and wondered if that was where God was leading me again.

But God kept nudging me, and I knew that He was nudging me to go. Through heart felt tears, I yielded to Him in prayer and simply said "Okay." Not long after that, I learned that our small group leader was planning a mission trip for the group. They were going to Kenya. I had a sudden, strange, unexplained, settled feeling. I was going to Kenya. I knew it. I am not even close to an outdoor girl, and Africa was not on my radar, yet I had peace. It was God.

Why are so many people going on mission trips? Is it just a fad? I hope not. I hope it is a movement of God! But if it is a fad, I am trusting that God will use this fad to accomplish his purpose. All I know is God wanted me to go - so I went - and I will never be the same!

Finishing Well

2011-08-24T19:28:00.000-05:00

Apparently I am now middle-aged. I am not real sure when that happened because I used to think those people were old. But now that I am peering ahead at senior citizenship, I have decided I like it here. The term "middle-aged" is a little deceiving since I doubt I will live another 55 years, but I know that each day brings me closer and closer to seeing Jesus face to face. For now, the following question has been presented to me: How will you finish? For the last months in our small group Bible study, we have been focusing on finishing well. Scripture gives two contrasting models in Solomon and Paul.

At a young age, Solomon followed his father David, as king of Israel and reigned for 40 years. God bestowed on him much wealth and he built many buildings, including the temple that David had wanted to build. However, "when Solomon was old . . . his heart was not loyal to the LORD his God." (I Kings 11:4) It is a sad ending to the life of the man who is remembered most for his God given wisdom. No matter how much God used Solomon in his lifetime, at the end he finished poorly.

Paul, on the other hand was guilty of the worst kind of persecution of first century Christians. He was a religious man who knew a lot about God but did not know God. He met Jesus on the road to Damascus and was forever changed. All the passion and zeal he had previously put toward persecuting Christians was now funneled toward following the leadership of Jesus and telling everyone he met about the risen Savior. Paul was put to death for his beliefs. Before he died he wrote "I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." (2 Timothy 4:7) Even though Paul had a rough start, he finished well.

I so want to finish well!

"For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain." (Philippians 1:21)

to live is Christ - that's right now if I'm still alive - gain comes later!

Jesus Knows No Barriers in Communication

2011-08-19T21:06:00.000-05:00

Since I have been a math teacher for a large portion of my life, I am familiar with the task of trying to determine the thinking trail of the one I teach. This is usually accomplished first by listening, and then by observing intonation, body language and facial expression. When I traded in my chalk for my Bible, I brought that process with me. The Word is infinitely more important than mathematics and I desperately want to know that I am making sense.

Last month I went on a mission trip to Kenya where they speak Swahili. You will not be surprised to hear that I do not speak nor understand Swahili. I had an interpreter but was unable to pick up on any of the nuances to which I was accustom to responding. I was frustrated and simply hoped they understood the message.

God spoke to me about that frustration Sunday when I witnessed the testimony and baptism of a young deaf Chinese man. Through the course of those few minutes, he communicated with us through the English language, American sign language, Chinese, and Chinese sign language. My heart was touched and from the sniffles I heard around me, mine was not the only one.

God reminded me that the things He wants communicated are not dependent on my words or my ability to "read" a person or situation. Neither is His communication dependent on our ability to hear. It is God who communicates and He is perfectly capable of making Himself heard. If God who spoke through a donkey (Numbers 22) chooses to speak through me, then that donkey and I are blessed to get to witness what He is doing.

Resting in Him, the frustrated "hope that they understand" becomes peace and faith. I'd rather trust Jesus than me any day!

Life With No Margins

2011-02-13T22:03:00.000-06:00

When I begin a new document, I start with minimum but equal margins and full justification. Can you picture the page full of print? God has been speaking to me lately about that page. In some ways it is a picture of the life of today's woman. The page holds obligations, commitments, and other time eating activities. Most of them are good. Still, the page is full!

On the best of days, life runs smoothly as scheduled. People and activities move in and out on cue. We finish the day with satisfaction and a sense of completion. However, if any one unexpected thing is added, or if something happens to alter what is already there, life begins slipping off the page. We frantically try to find more time in what we know is an already full, finite, twenty-four hour day. Sleep becomes the sacrifice.

The world has told us we can do it all and just like Eve, we have swallowed that apple. Watch this retro-commercial from the late seventies. It is one of those that settled into the minds of many of us, subtly leading us down a path of deception and false guilt. This was not the only messenger, but it was an effective one. I still know the words but did not remember the product.

What a cruel lie! No wonder our page is so full. (Click here for the entire song.)

We need nice, wide margins. Margins big enough for rest, big enough for God, and big enough to allow for detours. God never meant for us to do it all. He has a plan for each one of us and it fits nicely just inside proper margins.

Letting Go Is Hard

2011-01-27T14:40:00.000-06:00

I was reading about Hannah this morning in First Samuel. After years of not being able to conceive, Hannah promised the LORD that if He would give her a son, she would give that son back to Him. God did indeed give Hannah and Elkanah a son whom they named Samuel. When Samuel was three years old, Hannah took him to the temple to live with Eli. She gave him back to the LORD.

As a young adult, I prayed that I would have the faith of Hannah. As a mother, I was amazed at Hannah's faith! I found myself giving my children back to God over and over again. Maybe Hannah did that too in those first fleeting years. But maybe, through her inability to conceive, she learned early the profound truth that mothers struggle to hold. Our children are not ours at all, and they never have been. They are His.

When a sweet baby is born, the professionals tell us that the baby doesn't quite know where he stops and mom begins. The bond that the new mother has with her baby makes that distinction fuzzy for her also. It certainly feels like the baby is her own. But oh, so quickly, the little one begins a series of events in a journey toward independence. Rolling over, sleeping through the night, sitting up, walking. While each milestone is celebrated, there is an element of sadness as the mother realizes more and more that her baby needs her less and less. The heart's contradiction is huge.

In my world recently . . .
          A young mother stopped breast feeding.
A new mother went back to work.
A mother's first born started school.
          A mother's only child left for college.
          A mother's daughter got married.
And a mother's son died.
                                . . . letting go is hard.

You have your own list and even though these events are not the same as leaving your three year old at the temple forever, they are still hard passages. It would be easy for any mother to crumble in a corner and cry through these things. I have done my share. But read what Janet Parshall says in "A Woman After God's Own Heart":

"Motherhood gives us feelings of fuzzy blankets and baby rattles and toys to line the crib. But motherhood is actually one of God's refining fires. The reality of motherhood is that it's a place to learn surrender, letting go, trusting and believing that God is God."

What a perspective. And what an example Hannah is for us. We don't know exactly what she dealt with or how much she cried, but in the end there was surrender, trust, and believing God is who He says He is. May each of us come through the refining fire that way!

In my family, we are headed toward the milestones of both a first birthday and a second birthday on February 5. James is walking, climbing and doing everything a one year old should. Jonathan is talking, counting and doing everything a two year old should. Samuel mostly smiles and coos which is very appropriate for a three and a half month old.

My prayer today is for their mothers, the mothers of my grandchildren. My sweet girls, as you experience both the joys and struggles of motherhood, may you recognize "God's refining fires." May you find peace in trusting your most precious responsibilities to the only One who is trustworthy. And may the boys flourish as their mothers grow in their relationship with God. All to His glory, to His end, for His purpose.

I love you girls!

This Was the Weirdest Christmas Ever!

2011-01-20T17:21:00.001-06:00

. . . for a lot of reasons . . . some I understand, some I suppose I never will.

But I love the Christmas season usually. I love the atmosphere. I love the anticipation. I love the weather. I love the idea of people looking for the very best gift for someone they love. I love being in the crowds and busyness. And I love the focus on Christ. I love that the whole world celebrates Jesus!

This year was different. Somehow, December took on a life of its own and just drug me along. I didn't get my Christmas music out. I didn't get my Christmas cards out. I didn't stand in the crowds and breath in the atmosphere. I didn't get to tell anyone the Christmas story. Something was off. Christmas just kind of came and went before I knew what happened.

I guess the first Christmas kind of came and went before most people knew what happened. The birth of Jesus was not dependent on who was ready or who knew what was happening. There was no vote, no fanfare. God had planned for that time from the beginning of time, and the "time came"! (Luke 2:6) Immanuel. "God with us." God's Son born at God's time.

So here I am on the other side of Christmas and I've decided to celebrate. I'm glad God sent His Son in His time and didn't wait for us to get ready. I am also glad that Christmas is all about Christ and that it doesn't happen in the busy - it happens in your heart! If it hasn't happened for you, don't wait until December 24. He is ready now!

Christmas Isn't Christmas by Jimmy and Carol Owens
Christmas Isn’t Christmas
'till it happens in your heart,
Somewhere deep inside you
Is where Christmas really starts;

So give your heart to Jesus,
you'll discover when you do
That it’s Christmas
Really Christmas for you.

Just found this - just what I needed Leslie! Thanks!
http://littlethingsoflife.wordpress.com/2011/01/20/keeping-christmas/

Right Beside Me

2010-09-13T17:38:00.000-05:00

I was driving down the highway recently and started up a small hill, when I noticed the car in the lane next to me was pushing hard to make it up the hill. This was not a mountain but a slight, gradual rise in the road. My little Honda took it with no effort. As I passed the struggling car, I noticed it was also a Honda, but a Honda that had experienced a lot of abuse. From what I could see, three of the four corners of the car were dented. The wheels bowed out and wobbled like cartoon wheels. The paint was peeling and the fabric from the inside ceiling hung in strips. The back bumper was completely gone. I stopped to turn left and as the car sputtered past me, I noticed the license plate frame proudly proclaimed "LEXUS."

I wanted to laugh but the sight was just too pitiful.

I think maybe we are like those cars. There are people traveling through life beside us who are hurt. We see the glaring evidence of their hurt and we see labels that have been put on them. But do we see who they really are? We both have the same Maker but do they know Him? Maybe, . . . but are they trusting Him for so much less than He wants to give?

What about me? Is it a coincidence that he is right beside me?

He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.' Matthew 25:45 (NIV)

Whatever You Do, Don't Miss Jesus!

2010-09-06T18:37:00.000-05:00

". . . He saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John in a boat, preparing their nets. Without delay He called them, and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men and followed Him." Mark 1:19-20

I love this scripture. Jesus said come and they dropped everything! What a thrilling experience for those two young men. I have prayed that for my children, that they drop everything and go with Jesus wherever He wants them.

In my later years, I think about Zebedee. He was there too. I wonder if he prayed for his boys. Scripture doesn't tell us much about Zebedee, but what it does tell us is that he was their Daddy and they helped him fish. For me, the best part of fishing with my daddy was the time we spent together. Zebedee must have spent hours of time with his boys.

This morning I received pictures I had made of my family in July. It is late afternoon and I have done little else this entire day except look at pictures. Like Zebedee, I have spent countless hours with my children. My heart is full as I look at the pictures of the people who are so precious to me, but the overwhelming love pricks my heart with sadness because they live so far away and I miss them.

I don't know how Zebedee felt that day, but my sadness is laced with peace. Jesus said to my kids "come," and they went. When I am tempted to say "Don't go," I think about James and John, fight the tears, and think "Go! Don't miss it!"

As I began to write this post, a lump formed in my throat at the realization that my two grandsons names are James and Jonathan. A coincidence? Maybe. There is no Zebedee here and they are cousins, not brothers.

Still, my prayer for them both is that when Jesus says to them, "Come, follow me," they drop everything and go! Sweet boys, don't miss walking with Jesus!

New Appetite

2010-08-03T18:20:00.002-05:00

There is no way to estimate the amount of money I have spent on Diet Dr. Pepper in my life time. It has been my favorite and a constant companion for years. You could always find it in my refrigerator or see it at the end of my arm. No more.

I have given it up and replaced it with . . . are you ready for this? Water! Funny thing is, I found out I really love water. It started a few months ago when my oldest grandson started drinking water. I would give him his little sippy cup and he would eagerly guzzle that water like it was his life source, and then sighed with great satisfaction when he finished! The more I watched him, the more I thought, "I believe I need some of that water!"

So I began drinking water. The more water I drank, the more I liked it and the more I wanted. As it turns out it is really good for you. You already knew that, right? (Check out the wonders of water.)

But I got to thinking about our spiritual appetite. Do you ever spend time with people who love feasting on the Word of God. You can just tell that they have "been with Jesus." (Acts 4:13) Does it make you hungry to have what they are having? The truth is, He is our life source! The more we get, the more we like it and the more we want! As it turns out, it is really good for us too . . .

Taste and see that the Lord is good. Psalm 34:8

The Big Picture

2010-07-31T18:03:00.123-05:00

My family was home for the fourth of July. It is my new family holiday and I am excited about having them home for it every year. I had lots of fun decorating and even put out a jigsaw puzzle of Lady Liberty. A jigsaw puzzle table is such a friendly non-threatening place to sit around. No ones knows how long it has been since you found a piece to fit (except for the sudden exclamations of "I finally found one!") and conversation flows. They helped me with Lady Liberty but I was left to finish all that blue sky by myself!

There are two issues here that you may notice, both of which slowed down the progress of finishing the puzzle. My sister gave me the puzzle and she has a dog who might very well have enjoyed the puzzle before me. There is a piece completely missing just under her arm and there is a "chewed up" piece in the top right corner. Here's the problem with that. I looked everywhere for the missing piece and tried desperately to make other pieces fit in the empty place. Worse than that, I completely ignored the chewed piece thinking I would just stick it in whatever place was left at the end.

That is so much like the body of Christ. When someone is missing, no one else can fill their place. It was custom made just for them. The others have their own place and will not fit there. There is a gaping hole when one of the body is missing.

Likewise, there are members of the body that have been "chewed up" in life. They have been hurt and need to be patched up but they still have value to the body. There is a spot that only they can fill and there will be hole without them.

How about you? Are you missing the place God has for you in ministry? Have you been beat up by the world? Or are you the one making those decisions and have lost sight of God's plan? The picture is incomplete without all of us!

"Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it."

1 Corinthians 12:27

Mommy Rhapsody

2010-07-27T18:00:00.002-05:00

. . . for Mommies of all ages! enjoy!

Mommy Rhapsody from Church on the Move on Vimeo.

Some Final Thoughts About Mothering Your Grandchild's Mother

2010-07-24T17:47:00.002-05:00

Being a mother is a journey. The responsibility is huge, but the joy is even greater. At the outset, our lives are immediately and forever changed because our hearts are involved in a different way than ever before. The change prepares us for the trip but also makes us vulnerable along the way. As we go, we bask on the mountaintops of exceeding joy and struggle through the valleys of difficulty. The shared adventures of happiness, sadness, laughter and tears, provide a strong bond for the family of origin.

When our children marry, our journey changes but is not over. It is enriched, first by their spouses, then by their children. Just as the mother's family multiplies, so does her love. The heart has a great capacity to love. Our children's spouses are a treasured part of our family and we receive them with joy. But the excessive and outrageous love one feels for a grandchild is a mystery. Mixed up in there somewhere is the inseparable love for their parents. Where one stops and the other ends is not detectable. We love our children when we love their children and we love our grandchildren when we love and support their parents. The role of grandmother doesn't replace the role of mother, it gives it another dimension. Mothering your grandchild's mother is an act of love displayed through nurturing. What an honor!

Do you know the story of Rizpah in 2 Samuel 21? She is not well known and it might be easy to miss her in scripture. Her sons were hung on a mountain for something they did not do. Her sacrificial love prompted her to stop her life for what was probably about six months. During that time, in love she protected their bodies from vultures and wild animals. She faithfully stayed with them until the king came to bury their bodies. She was a mother.

There is one that loves more than a mother. His name is Jesus! He died for sins He did not commit and lives again! He did it all. Sacrifice, protection, faithfulness, unconditional love, giving up His life for someone else. We can know Him better through our human efforts in the role of a mother. But He did it with perfection!

I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms

(Ephesians 1:18-20 NIV)

Unconditional Love (Mothering Your Grandchild's Mother Part VI)

2010-07-19T10:42:00.002-05:00

Before I began this writing project, I survey between forty and fifty young mothers. I asked them to tell me what they need from their mothers and mothers-in-law. They were to include both things they need and have and things they need but do not have. I found their comments to fall into four general categories:

Affirmation and Encouragement
Boundaries
Help
Unconditional Love

By far the most comments were about unconditional love. What a great reminder. The unconditional love that flooded our hearts when we became mothers is still what they crave most. A fresh reading of 1 Corinthians 13 as the mother of a mother is powerful!

Love and pray for them as they make decisions and establish their own traditions. Support them as they blend two new families in a world that differs from the one in which they were raised. Loving them unconditionally through this process will provide them not only affirmation, but security also. Offer them advice when asked but tell them often that they are loved. Assure them that there is no condition in which your love will be withdrawn.

What I heard the young mothers say was "Love me! Love my child!" So I will finish with more comments from their own hearts. As you read this small sampling, listen with your heart - the heart of a mother.

Love Me:
"I need her to love me unconditionally. To really love me."

"I need love. I need to know they love me even when I am hard to love."

"Remember that I am a broken, sinful, imperfect person. Be merciful with me and forgiving."

"Say I love you."

"I need her to approve of my husband and support him."

"Be there to talk when I need it."

"Call me to keep in touch because sometimes I forget to call."

"She is real with me. I don't feel like she is unapproachable about things. I can talk to her because she doesn't judge me or make me feel stupid."

"Do not expect me to trust you when you have not attempted to get to know me during our marriage and all of a sudden have a great interest in being my friend after a baby arrives."

"Treat the son or daughter-in-law much like the real daughter or son. There will always be a difference but it is nice to feel included. . . Talk about the other side of the family to the child. . . Ask about [their] family."

Love My Child:
"Listen to me brag on my baby without comparing to the other grandbaby. Totally ok if you do it in your head."

"Be excited about the first word, step, smile, even though you have already experienced it before."

"I need her to WANT to spend time with me and the kids."

"She never tires of my children. I know that she gets worn out sometimes . . . but she never acts like she would rather be somewhere else with someone else."

"To a grandmother who has multiple grandchildren . . . try and give them equal attention/love . . . It can divide families and hurt feelings if one grandchild has all the photos in the house, etc."

"If you are wanting to keep the grandchild, don't wait to be asked, offer. If you don't . . . it appears you don't want to . . .we won't ask because we don't want you to feel obligated."

Do you know the mother of your grandchild's love language?

Help! Mothering Your Grandchild's Mother Part V

2010-07-08T12:36:00.002-05:00

Last month I took my sixteen-month-old grandson to lunch. It was our first excursion for just the two of us and I was so delighted to spend time with the little man. But oh my! I had forgotten how much was involved. It began with me juggling Jonathan, money, and mandarin oranges at the cash register, and ended with renegade milk leaping into the air while I grabbed for my running toddler!

Mothers need help! But asking for help is sometimes difficult. In What Every Mom Needs, Elisa Morgan and Carol Kuykendall recognize that "most of us go to great lengths on our own before actually asking for help." The reasons for this are varied but most boil down to a feeling of guilt. Somehow we as mothers think we should be able to do it all, that other mothers do it all, and we are expected to do it all. We reason, "we've made the choice to be mothers, and now we will deal with whatever motherhood throws our way." Life situations from unexpected pregnancy to medical help for conception add to that mindset in their own way.

Asking may be hard because she fears judgment, has a hard time letting go of control, or is simply too busy to ask. Whatever the reason, meet her where she is. Ask how you can help the young mother in your life and keep listening even if she tells you she doesn't need anything. Find out if she is more comfortable with you helping wherever you see a need or if she prefers to tell you specifics. Make it safe for her but be assured that she needs help. If you need to be asked before you feel comfortable helping, tell her. Good communications is key for both parties.

In surveying young mothers, I received a list of how mothers help and how they need mothers to help that was extensive and touching. But the general theme was as follows. "Offer Help. Don't wait to be asked. Anything helps. Anything you like to do and want to do is appreciated." There was also appreciation for unsolicited help. "Every time I had my plate full she was there to lend a hand." Here are a few other comments.

"A mom who is willing to rock, pace, sing to a colicky baby even though none of it helps. She smiles as if she is having the time of her life."

"Amazing willingness to come and help any time of the day at the drop of a hat."

"Babysit and allow time for us to build our marriage relationship."

"Spiritually I see her teaching me how to teach my child."

I also received many comments about mothers help with cooking, gardening, decorating, sewing, parenting advice, childcare, laundry, and sick children. You have great value and she wants to know what you know!

Getting As Close As We Can

2010-07-07T13:07:00.000-05:00

Our celebration of the fourth of July was in Birmingham for the first time this year and culminated with "Thunder on the Mountain" fireworks shot from Vulcan Park. We left home about thirty minutes early headed to a building top, but noticed almost immediately that traffic was creeping along like rush hour in the wrong direction!
Soon, traffic was almost completely stopped and people were pulling over to the median and the side of the road. We managed to find a place to park just in time to hear the police come by with a loud speaker telling people they were not allowed to park in the street! We were still very far away from Vulcan Park!

In the end, "Thunder on the Mountain" was great. We had gotten as close as we could and the fireworks leaped into the sky! Someone turned up the accompanying music on their car radio and it seemed all of us on the highway listened in silence. It was a peaceful moment we shared with a multitude of strangers. Sometimes things are a bigger deal than we expect. What a nice surprise and sweet memory!

Just as we casually went to see the fireworks not knowing what to expect, Zacchaeus, in Luke 19, went to see Jesus out of curiosity. It was a bigger deal than he expected. He had gotten as close as he could when Jesus walked through the crowd and went to him. His life was forever changed! Jesus Christ is a big deal - the biggest! The good news is this: If you are only casually looking for Jesus or if you are looking for Jesus only out of curiosity, Jesus is looking for you! Get as close as you can. He is already there!

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.

James 4:8a