PARENTS AND TEENS

Welcome Gusts to my blog

2010-11-11T06:53:00.000-08:00

This page is designed especially for my dear visitors. In class, we were asked to exchange with comments on each other blogs. I’m inviting you to take a tour and post any comments about my blog or post your own.

Thank you for your participation.

2010-11-05T07:06:00.000-07:00

How to Write a Home Rules Contracthttp://www.teenswithproblems.com/home_contract.html
Every home should have its own set of family rules. Family rules simplify explanations, clarify expectations, and create a safe environment for your children and their friends. We have our list of family rules taped to the refrigerator. I copied this list down a long time ago from somewhere, and these rules have served our family well over the years.

FAMILY RULES LIST
1. Tell the truth.
2. Treat each other with respect.

no yelling

no hitting

no kicking

no name-calling

no put-downs

3. No arguing with parents.

We want and value your input and ideas, but arguing means you have made your points more than once.

4. Respect each other’s property.

Ask permission to use something that doesn’t belong to you.

5. Do what Mom and Dad say the first time.

without complaining or throwing a fit!

6. Ask permission before you go somewhere.

7. Put things away that you take out.

8. Look for ways to be kind and helpful to each other.

Teens With Problems

2010-11-05T07:02:00.000-07:00

Does My Teen Need Help
Teens may face with many problems, and they shouldn't be left off from parents attention. Each parent is responsible for their child and should keep an eye on everything what is going on with their child. Some parents don't see things as they should because they busy with their own live and their eyes, ears, and hart are closed for their children until something happened. Don't wait, get close to your child. This link will get you to the site where you can test yourself by answering questions and professionals will give you very valuable advise how to help you and your child.

Link to: Does My Teen Need Help?

Signs of a Bad Friend

2010-11-03T09:48:00.000-07:00

Do we need a friend? Yes we do! It's natura,l and we can't live with out communication. Looking for a good friend could take some time. Adults have friends so do the teens. Friendship can be very good and positive thing, but also it can be a night mare. we all need to be a little bit careful when choose a friend. I noticed in my teens that friendship in many cases is a stress. I understand that we need to think about friendship as a way of support, but more offer this support comes only from one side.

Teen's Closet

2010-11-03T08:46:00.000-07:00

What to wear can be the hardest question for your teen. When our children go through the growth stage, we buy different sizes, styles, and colors of clothes and shoes. To buy clothing for my children never been a problem, but when my oldest two turned to teenagers I faced with this issue face to face. Of course, teens want to be in style, look sexy, and want more expensive brand clothing. But, can we afford what they want? Do they really have an extreme need in brand clothing? I personally don't think that it necessary. As a parent, I talked to my children about and explain them that it is not good to have everything that they want because they can loose sense of responsibility, values, and normal life.

Do Teens Need to Know About Money Management
Clothes Talk: Parents & Teens
20 Beauty Secrets Every Teen Should Know
How to Disagree with Your Teen's Style of Dress

Teen Pregnancy

2010-11-02T08:59:00.000-07:00

The lack of education on safe sex, whether it's from parents, schools, or otherwise, is a cause of teenage pregnancy. Teen pregnancy is an important issue. There are health risks for the baby and children born to teenage mothers are more likely to suffer health, social, and emotional problems. In developed countries, teenage pregnancies are associated with many social issues, including lower educational levels, higher rates of poverty, and other poorer "life outcomes" in children of teenage mothers. Teenage pregnancy in developed countries is usually outside of marriage, and carries a social stigma in many communities and cultures. Many studies and campaigns have attempted to uncover the causes and limit the numbers of teenage pregnancies. In other countries and cultures, particularly in the developing world, teenage pregnancy is usually within marriage and does not involve a social stigma. Parents, protect your child from early pregnancy by educating them about family values, importantcy of marrage, and building strong society.

Dating Teens

2010-11-02T06:59:00.000-07:00

Teens and Dating

A teen does not learn how to date in the classroom; they learn it ether from their family, friends, or explore it on their own. It is normal for teen to get interested in dating, but it could be bad experience for them if parents didn't talk about at all at home. Before parent will share their dating stories with their teen, parent need to sort that information because not all your own experience need to be know right away.

Teens and Internet

2010-11-01T07:00:00.000-07:00

What Parents Need To Know About Teens and Internet Usage

Driving Teens

2010-10-28T21:14:00.000-07:00

When our children getting close to their 16th birthday, they cannot stop talking about having a car.

They search online and pick model, and color of their future car. They are so excited about that they come up with plans that are not always bringing a positive ending in their story. Teens have poor understanding of responsibilities, and unfortunately don't take parent's suggestions seriously. Driving could be not only needed for everyday life, it also can be a danger for the teenagers and for the other drivers. Teens use to say, "It won't happen to me" and don't adopt the fact that it could happen if they don't take a full responsibility of their life and others.

First Time Car Buying Tips For Teens & Safe Teen Driving

Insuring Your Teen Driver

Benefits of Waiting to Let Teens Drive

Talented Teens

2010-10-28T06:59:00.000-07:00

Talented teens: they are making their mark at an early age

LOOK out world! Here comes the newest generation of trailblazers, who just happen to be teenagers. And what they lack in years, they make up with an impressive show of determination and drive. Each of these outstanding teenagers shares a common thread--a willingness to succeed in their chosen professions beyond the expectations of society.
With determination, patience, and the support of family, they are all going places--and fast.

PARENT'S AND TEENS: Teens and Credit Cards

2010-10-18T09:04:00.000-07:00

PARENT'S AND TEENS: Teens and Credit Cards

What teens do when parents aren't home

2010-10-17T21:04:00.000-07:00

We can't control everything when we are not home. Most parents spend their day at work. But what our children are doing? Have you ever ask yourself about? Kids may not tell us, but we can find it from YouTube. Whatch this!

Teens and Credit Carts

2010-10-17T18:52:00.000-07:00

What Teens Need to Know About Credit Cards

When you give financial freedom to your teens, don't forget one fact- teens can be out of control and use credit card for fun. Teens don't take it serious and may spend hundreds dollars a day. To avoid this situation, try to explain all advantages and disadvantages of using credit cards. Don't give credit card that has higher credit limit. Protect yourself from bankruptcy by limiting your child's spending.

http://financialplan.about.com/od/studentsandmoney/a/TeenCreditCards.htm

http://cashmoneylife.com/2010/03/16/credit-card-tipsfor-teens/

6 Things Teens Need to Know Before Leaving Home

2010-10-17T18:34:00.000-07:00

Secrets for making a smooth transition from adolescence to adulthood.

As a young person with ADD, you have some additional responsibilities and concerns to shoulder. Here are six points to consider as you enter the next phase of your life.
1. Take responsibility for managing ADD in your life. As life becomes more complicated and responsibilities increase (college, relationships, work), the need to manage ADD effectively (including your treatment) becomes more important, not less.
2. Don't feel that you must go to college—at least not right away. If your enthusiasm about this next stage is only lukewarm, consider deferring your enrollment, or taking classes at a community college.
3. Develop life skills before you leave home. As you acquire survival skills, you won't need to depend on your parents as much, and they will certainly send you in the right direction.
4. Follow your heart to the right job or career. The right career is the one that you are passionate about. If you need help identifying your areas of interest, vocational testing and career counseling can be very helpful.
5. Take care of your brain by taking care of your body. A healthy lifestyle (exercise, sleep, and proper nutrition) makes a significant difference in attention, concentration, memory, irritability, and mood control — all of which are directly affected by ADD.
6. On the river of life, be a boat—not a log. Having a vision for the future and an understanding that your life's course is the result of your own actions is critical. As a log, all you can do is float where the current takes you. As a boat, you can drift if you want to, but you have the ability to direct your course when you know where you want to go.

College planning

2010-10-05T19:40:00.000-07:00

Probably another important step in our teen-life is planning for higher education. This task is not easy for both sides- parents and teens. Select the right program, college, and location of the college is hard. We think about the best future for our children, but our children think differently. It is not a secret that parents pay for their children's' education and select a college that we can afford, closer to home and very often dictate what program our children should take. Teens think differently; they want to get out of the house with friends as far as possible, so parents can't control them. To avoid this situation, sit down and talk, get advice from education counselor, search online for more specific information, do it together. College Planning for Teens has a lot of helpful information. Build closer relationships with your child, be their friend and parent.

Teens and Work

2010-10-05T19:09:00.000-07:00

When our children grow, they need more attention, understanding, However there is a time when our teens have to learn how become an independent from their parents. At this age, teens crazy about cars, clothes, entertainment, etc. When parents refuse to give a money to their teens, teens start looking for other sources. There are many sources and not all sources may be legal. We teach our children to find a job when it's a time and many of them start seeking for the employment opportunity. We as a parents have to encourage our teens to work and make them ready for it. Follow this link to find and an article about Tips for Teens Who Toil and sponsored links where teens can apply for a job.

2010-10-05T18:35:00.000-07:00

Bad acne linked to suicidal thinking in teens

Teens with bad acne are at a greater risk of having suicidal thoughts than their peers.

STORY HIGHLIGHTS

Kids with severe acne are twice as likely to have mental health problems
One-fifth of teenagers develop moderate to severe acne
Researchers do not know if acne treatments, such as isotretinoin, played a role

Compared to their clear-skinned peers, teens who have bad acne are more than twice as likely to have mental health problems and are at greater risk of having suicidal thoughts, according to a new study of Norwegian youth.
Nearly all teenagers have some pimples, and up to one in five will develop a moderate to severe case of acne.
A bad complexion can be psychologically devastating at "a critical point in human development where self-image and confidence [are] being established," says Dr. Jerry Tan, M.D., a dermatologist at the University of Western Ontario, in Canada.
Health.com: 8 steps to healthy skin at every age
"There are hidden consequences to acne -- particularly severe acne," says Tan, who was not involved in the study.
However, the researchers can't say for sure if acne is to blame or whether isotretinoin and other acne treatments may have played a role; they don't know how many teens in the study (or which ones) were being treated.
Isotretinoin, the active ingredient in brand-name drugs such as Accutane and Claravis, has been linked to depression, suicide, and suicidal thinking in the past.
Health.com: 10 things to say (and not say) to someone with depression
"There has been a lot of controversy about this, especially in the U.S.," says the lead author of the study, Dr. Jon A. Halvorsen, M.D., of the University of Oslo, in Norway. "But depression and suicidal [thoughts] in acne reflects the burden of acne, rather than being a side effect of isotretinoin."
In the study, which was funded by the Norwegian Institute of Public Health and published in the Journal of Investigative Dermatology, the researchers surveyed nearly 4,000 teens ages 18 or 19. Fourteen percent of the teens reported having "a lot" or "very much" acne.
Nearly 25 percent of the teens with "very much" acne said they'd had thoughts of suicide, compared with 11 percent of the study participants overall.
Health.com: How to spot the warning signs of suicide
In addition, the teens with bad acne were 52 percent more likely to have low attachment to friends. They were also more likely to do poorly in school, and were less likely to have had a boyfriend or girlfriend.
The psychological impact of acne appears to be greater in boys than in girls. The researchers aren't sure why this is, although they say it could be because girls tend to treat their acne more aggressively than boys.
The findings "are not surprising and agree with what I see in clinical practice," Tan says. "Those with more severe acne have greater psychological problems and social impairment."
The study couldn't prove that acne directly causes suicidal thinking and other mental health problems. As the researchers note, the link could run in the other direction: Psychological stress may make acne worse.
Health.com: 10 no-cost strategies to fight depression
Nor does the study close the book on the purported link between isotretinoin and depression, Tan says, although he adds that the evidence for the link was not particularly compelling to begin with.
"While these results do not exonerate isotretinoin in causing depression, it does suggest that severe acne in and of itself is associated with suicidal [thoughts]," he says.

Suicidal thoughts sometimes lead to suicide attempts. Suicide currently ranks second (behind injuries) as the leading cause of death among adolescents in the industrialized world, according to background information in the study.

11 Mistakes Parents Make With Teen Discipline

2010-10-05T18:17:00.000-07:00

Raging hormones, misunderstandings, raised voices, restrictions and curfews come to mind for many when they hear the phrase “teen discipline.” But wouldn’t you rather think of respect, transitioning into adulthood, rational discussions and reasonable behavior?

The recipe for raising children requires a delicate balance of authority and love. And, with teens, that balance becomes even more precarious. How can you discipline your teen without destroying your relationship?

I surveyed teens in Charleston, S.C., to find out what they thought were the biggest mistakes parents make when disciplining their teenagers. Here were the top two:

1. Lack of consistency – While all children need consistent discipline, it’s even more important for teens. They get frustrated when a behavior is acceptable one day and not acceptable the next. The established rules need specific consequences. Realistic and consistent consequences demonstrate a “real world” view for teens. Creating house rules with consequences, then responding appropriately, provides all children with security and direction.

2. Not listening – Parents want to be respected but don’t always return that respect by listening to their teenager. Not listening to your teen expresses that you don’t feel he has anything valuable to say. Even when disagreeing, teens should be given time to express their feelings and thoughts. This shouldn’t give a teen the right to be ugly or behave inappropriately, of course. Modeling and developing guidelines for how argumentative ideas should be expressed is essential. If you want to be heard, learn to listen.

What other mistakes do parents make, according to teens, when disciplining their children?

. Punishing in anger – Angel, 16, says she “just shuts down” when her father gets angry and starts yelling. Sometimes parents only punish once they have reached the end of their patience. In reality, this allows teens to misbehave for a period of time before suffering any consequences. Not only is this confusing, it can also lead to abuse. Dealing with a teenager emotionally often produces dramatic immediate effects, but ultimately it creates a communication wall in the relationship. Consistent parenting, as described above, prevents punishing in anger. Stepping away from the situation to recover emotionally also proves helpful.

4. Irrelevant punishment – Whenever possible, the punishment should be reflective of wrongdoing. For example, if a teen returns home after curfew, limiting his nights out temporarily would be appropriate. A teen that doesn’t complete school work might be required to miss a social event to complete the work. If the teen misses the social event as a punishment, but doesn’t actually do school work, the consequences don’t make sense and just seem spiteful.

5. Accepting any behavior because of age – While it is a scientific fact that teens undergo traumatic emotional and physical changes, that fact should not be an excuse to be allowed to behave inappropriately. Often, teens who are allowed to behave badly do not grow out of that behavior as adults. Character is character at any age. Behavioral expectations should be related to what is right, not the age of the child.

6. Using guilt rather than reason – Guilt may create an immediate response, but this style of discipline actually promotes internal emotional issues for teens that may not be dealt with until adulthood, if ever. Reasoning with a teenager, providing a basis for your expectations and consequences, does not always evoke an immediate response, but the long-term results are typically more positive.

7. Being a friend rather than a parent – Teens usually have more than enough social outlets. They need boundaries and safe, secure situations in which to grow. You are the provider of both, and when you act like a friend, your teen will lose security. Teens who view their parents as authority figures and providers are more likely to be close to them in adulthood. Despite what appearances might suggest, teens do not respect parents who behave like teens. Relating to your teen, based on your own experiences, can be a successful method of working through challenging situations, but at no time should you lose your parent status.

8. Attack the person rather than the behavior – It’s essential to make sure your teen knows that you love him despite anything he does. Even greater, you love him enough to not let him develop behaviors that may be harmful to him or anyone else. Direct your criticisms and comments at the behavior, not the teen

9. You become the enemy – At times, you may feel like the enemy, and your teenager might actually refer to you as such. No matter how hurt you may feel, it’s important to remain the one person who consistently stands by your teenager. Friends and teachers will come and go. You will always be the parent. By establishing rules and consequences, you’re the one person in your teen’s life that holds him accountable no matter what. Even if we don’t like authority figures in our lives, they typically establish order and security.

10. Lose your sense of humor – It’s not funny when your teenager messes up, particularly when you’re left to clean up the mess. Losing your sense of humor won’t help.

It may not seem funny at the time, but most challenging situations can eventually be viewed in a comical way. If your teen feels comfortable laughing and joking with you regularly, he’ll also be more likely to listen when you get serious. John Paul, 14, said, “I use humor to deal with a lot of situations. It’s better to laugh than to get angry.”

11. Stopping your teen from failing at all costs – Some of life’s greatest lessons result from failing. Parents who micromanage their teens because they are afraid of their teen failing prevent their child from developing important life skills. As much as you don’t want to have to discipline your teen, letting him fail and living with the consequences can teach him more than your chosen punishment.

Teens habits

2010-10-05T18:13:00.000-07:00

What are the teenagers bad habits?

Most teenagers do the things that will annoy their parents most, e.g. staying up late, playing loud music, driving fast, making messes and not cleaning things up, not showing respect for their parents rules, getting drunk etc.
The thing is, most teenagers do not have to go through the 'teenage' stage everyone think they do. Mostly they do it because of peer pressure and because it's partly expected of them. It's also experimenting with becoming a young adult, and determining what kind of adult they would like to be.

Early puberty
Understanding early puberty - causes, diagnosis, & treatment
www.CPPInformation.com

STRESSED?

2010-09-27T10:14:00.000-07:00

Stress comes from different resources and we have to learn how to deal with it. First of all, what is a stress?
Researchers define stress as a physical, mental, or emotional response to events that causes bodily or mental tension. Simply put, stress is any outside force or event that has an effect on our body or mind. People attend to get stressed because of their lifestyle or from nothing. For families with teenagers, it's obvious to be stressed on daily basis. When kids turning to an adults, their hormone level is changing and increases fussiness, change their body, mind, and their behavior too. This is a stressful period for them and for us, parents.
There are hundreds advises how to deal with stress and each person should try to find its own method that would effectively help to an individual. http://www.studygs.net/stress.htm

Here are very basic tips to be strees free:

Excersise everyday
Eeat healthy

Take vitimins

How To Encourage Your High School Student to Do Their Best

2010-09-22T06:42:00.000-07:00

Encouraging your high school student to do their best isn’t as hard as you may think. It does take time and effort, but it should become part of a daily routine that both you and your teen can enjoy more than dread.

This article has good tips that would help you as a parent to guide your high school child and will help your child set goals and achieve them.

Дети, школа и друзья

2010-09-21T20:09:00.000-07:00

Мы родители всегда опасаемся за своих детей и порой чрезмерно за них печемся. Родительская любовь может не только уберечь своих детей от дурных поступков, но и подталкнуть их на это.
Как правило, дети копируют нас с мальства и очень много чего у них остается в их характере на всю жизь. Даже страшно иногда бывает когда видешь себя в них.

Дети- наше будующее и мы, как родители, просто обязанны воспитать их так, чтобы они восполнили места тех, которые сделали огромный вклад в наше общество. А именно воспитанных, образованных и добропорядочных людей. В настоящее время родители занеты своими проблемами и им нет особого дела до своих сокровищ, а поэтому телевизор и другие девайсы занимаются воспиганием наших детей. Что бесчувстенная елестроника может дать ребенку, ничего кроме агресивности, жестокости, безжалости, бессердечноси что ,как правило, перерастает в убийство и насилие.

Школа вмещает в себя детей с разных социальных слоев и в процессе обучения ребенок получает как традиционное школьное обучение так и дополнительное так называемое уличное обучение.
Особенно подростки очень легко поподаются под плахое влияние со стороны своих сверстников в школе и несут негатив в семью.

PARENT'S FEAR: In these days, it is very hard to deal with youth....

2010-09-21T06:35:00.000-07:00

PARENT'S FEAR: In these days, it is very hard to deal with youth....: "In these days, it is very hard to deal with youth. They are very aggressive and out of control. So many young people don't know what to do w..."

2010-09-07T06:54:00.000-07:00

In these days, it is very hard to deal with youth. They are very aggressive and out of control. So many young people don't know what to do with their lives. I think this is a huge problem and causes danger for our society. If we can find what this age group likes to do and, come up with some ideas how to deal with them we may save many young lives. In our area we almost have nothing for this age group; so maybe it is time to build a youth center with lots of affordable, and interesting activities for them?

Or maybe it is time for parents to analyze their lives? With such a busy life parents can't find time for their children. There are so many helpful materials that can be found online which, can be used as a useful implement in parenting. However, nothing will replace parents' love, care, and understanding.
An adultsome thinks that parents don't care, don't understand them and with their aggressiveness they are trying to show these statements.
I have children of my own and two out of four are teens. I wasn't prepared for these situations that I have faced with. I thought that they are still kids, and treated them like my other two little ones, but it didn't work out as well. I had to find a new way of communication, new words, new key to their mind and hearts.
Safe Driving Resources

The Facts About Teen Driving

Start the Conversation

Car crashes caused by teen drivers are the #1 killer of teens in America today. As you read the statistics below, keep in mind the most telling statistic of all: according to a recent survey, 89 percent of teens said their parents have the biggest influence on how they drive.

The Epidemic

Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death among American teenagers, killing between 5,000 and 6,000 teenagers every year.

No other kind of hazard comes close to claiming as many teenage lives, including homicides (13 percent) and suicides (11 percent). (2002 figures)

A Teenager's Odds

Teenage drivers account for 12.6 percent of all drivers involved in fatal crashes.

The fatal crash rates among 16- to 19-year-olds is four times that of older drivers.

Risk is the highest at age 16, when the fatal crash rate is 40 percent higher than for 18 year-olds and 30 percent higher than for 19-year-olds.

The Enemies*

Cell Phones

56 percent of teens said they make and answer phone calls while driving.

Talking on a cell phone can double the likelihood of an accident and can slow a young driver’s reaction time to that of a 70-year-old.

13 percent of teens said they send and respond to text messages while driving.

Speeding

17 percent of teens said speeding is fun.

55 percent of teens said they exceed the speed limit by more than 10 mph.

26 percent of self-identified "aggressive" teen drivers reported speeding by more than 20 mph over the limit.

69 percent of teens who speed said they do so because they want to keep up with traffic.

Peer Pressure

44 percent of teens said they drive more safely without friends in the car.

67 percent of teens said they have felt unsafe when someone else was driving.

Only 45 percent said they would definitely speak up if someone were driving in a way that scared them.

37 percent said they would ride with one or more friends who speed in the coming year.

*Statistics on teen views are from a recent Allstate Foundation survey.

The Allies

Seat Belts

Wearing lap/shoulder belts can reduce the risk of dying in a crash by 45 percent.

Teens have the lowest rate of seat belt use.

Curfews

More than 40 percent of teen auto deaths occur between the hours of 9 p.m. and 6 a.m.

Almost 60 percent of teens’ night time auto deaths occur before midnight.

PARENTS AND TEENS

Welcome Gusts to my blog

Teens With Problems

Signs of a Bad Friend

Teen's Closet

Teen Pregnancy

Dating Teens

Teens and Dating

Teens and Internet

What Parents Need To Know About Teens and Internet Usage

Driving Teens

Talented Teens

Talented teens: they are making their mark at an early age

PARENT'S AND TEENS: Teens and Credit Cards

What teens do when parents aren't home

Teens and Credit Carts

6 Things Teens Need to Know Before Leaving Home

Secrets for making a smooth transition from adolescence to adulthood.

College planning

Teens and Work

Bad acne linked to suicidal thinking in teens

11 Mistakes Parents Make With Teen Discipline

Teens habits

STRESSED?

How To Encourage Your High School Student to Do Their Best

Дети, школа и друзья

PARENT'S FEAR: In these days, it is very hard to deal with youth....

The Facts About Teen Driving

Start the Conversation

Car crashes caused by teen drivers are the #1 killer of teens in America today. As you read the statistics below, keep in mind the most telling statistic of all: according to a recent survey, 89 percent of teens said their parents have the biggest influence on how they drive.

The Epidemic

Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death among American teenagers, killing between 5,000 and 6,000 teenagers every year. No other kind of hazard comes close to claiming as many teenage lives, including homicides (13 percent) and suicides (11 percent). (2002 figures)

A Teenager's Odds

The Enemies*

The Allies

Motor vehicle crashes are the leading cause of death among American teenagers, killing between 5,000 and 6,000 teenagers every year.

No other kind of hazard comes close to claiming as many teenage lives, including homicides (13 percent) and suicides (11 percent). (2002 figures)