Relaxing with my Thoughts

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Wed, 30 Nov 2011 17:38:00 +0000

last of the mohicans

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Sun, 12 Sep 2010 01:36:00 +0000

It’s been awhile since we talked to each other

And I know that I haven’t been the best brother

But as the years go by, I getting lonely without you by my side

We can’t change the past or make up the time

But we can start something new and leave it all behind

So I hope you come home and put the bear inside you to sleep

Find your way out of that hole, before you dig too deep

Search you soul for the man you want to be

And maybe together we will finally be free.

Dating Tales

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Tue, 10 Aug 2010 14:05:00 +0000

Chapter 1 - Slingshot Monkey

I had met Kate 2 weeks earlier while walking through the park. She was tall with short hair and brown eyes. She was also an opera singer and had this booming beautiful voice. Our first date had gone well. We had pie and coffee and then walked up and down UES for hours. She was quirky and funny and even wanted to stop at my apartment to jump on my bed. I liked her.

Our second date was two weeks after our first one because I had gone to visit my brother in San Diego and also went to Vegas. I called her before I left and I told her I would bring her back something. She was going to Baltimore for the weekend and also promised to bring me a present. Kate suggested we have Korean BBQ and said she knew a place around Union Square and we agreed to meet there around 8. So I am waiting outside the Korean BBQ place with an elegant coffee mug I had bought her in Vegas since she drank a lot of coffee. She finally arrives about 15 minutes late which is right on time in girl-time and we walk in and sit down. We find a table at the far end of the place and it’s pretty crowded for a Wednesday night. So start talking for a few minutes and order a couple of entrees when I decide to give her my gift. She tears open the wrapping to find the wonderful mug I purchased at the hotel gift. She actually really liked it and was glad I remembered how much she loved coffee.

So then she turns to me and says she wants to give me my gift. She tells me to close my eyes and hold out my hands. A few seconds later she tells me to open my eyes and I see a small brown furry thing in front of me for a split second and then it flies out of her hand, up in the air and lands in the middle of the restaurant and lands right next to another couple. All the other couple sees is a brown furry thing falling from the ceiling and they assume it’s a rat. So the woman lets out a scream and both of them jump away from their table sending dishes and glasses flying everywhere. On of the waiters sees this furry thing on the floor and leaps over the table, knocking it to the ground to smother it.

The table is on the floor, food is everywhere, broken glass and silverware all over the place and everyone in the restaurant if silent and staring at this man on the floor covering in food lying on top of something. The waiter slowly gets up and looks down to see a brown furry stuffed monkey wearing a cape. He then looks up at me in awe and says what is this? I quickly look over to Kate, who surveys the scene, pauses for a seconds and says “What? Slingshot Monkey”

Self Reflection

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Mon, 02 Aug 2010 02:34:00 +0000

Why can't you finish what you've started?
Why can't you try and understand?
It doesn't make a bit of difference if you start what you can't finish
Every story needs an ending, after all.

I think I've known it for a long time
Suffice to say, it's been a while
You're too afraid to face the outcome
Quite likely, you're a failure
It's a shitty thing to say, but hey man - the clock is ticking

I thought of all the things I'd like to say
Cramped up and couldn't write a word all day
I just waited for my world to fall apart
That's why I'll never finish anything I start

What fills the magic in the meantime?
I know it’s hard without a vice,
You need to find a new solution,
Adaptation or retribution,
If you truly do believe in something,
Somehow it all works out.

I'm completely bored
With every single word
And nothing ever works
And this juvenile search
Is systematically revealing to me
That I need a new approach

So sick of all the things I'm trying to say
Cramped up and couldn't write a word all day
I just waited for my world to fall apart
That's why I'll never finish anything I...

Sunday Song

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Mon, 02 Aug 2010 02:29:00 +0000

I'm never waking up again so I'll never have to find out what you did
Each day it's harder to pretend That your eyes aren't lying as much as your mouth did
I'd grab your head by your hair and I'd hack it off
And put it on display at the front of the yard on a stick that's decorated with a little pink bow and a sign that says Her friends and family should have taught her more about love
Dear Tragedy, I never had anybody. But being alone wasn't half as bad as being obsessed with a breath taker, a smile faker But these years alone have eaten me alive. Recounting pages in a book
That I'd torn out ashamed that one day you'd look
Afraid that once you did you'd really know how it felt to be a sucker on a string that you dragged around wherever you'd go I'm running around, around and it hurts. Tempted to tape up the pages I'd ripped And although I recognize that we're attached at the lips ,you're the one in charge and that the captain's gotta sink with the ship Breath taker, smile faker, how could I have let you in my life? You're a breath taker, smile faker These years alone have eaten me alive

Bro Hymn

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Tue, 25 May 2010 20:42:00 +0000

I did not know John for very long. We were not even that close of friends. I worked with him at the Coveleigh for a few months back in 2001. I waited tables as John worked in the kitchen. Although it was just a waiter job the few months I worked there had a great impact on my life and so did John Mike and Chef Steve. I didn't know it then but the short time I spent there helped me get ahead in my personal and professional life. I had just graduated college and I could not find a job. After six months of looking I took the job at the Coveleigh because I needed the money but It turned out to be so much more.

I became friendly with John on the first day I arrived. He had this big smile and loud booming voice. He always held the room and you could feel his presence. For the next couple of months I spent my weekends sweating in that hot kitchen carrying out the dishes that John made. The work was unforgiving and I had to wear a stupid looking bowtie but the comradery with John Mike and Steve made it all worth while. I remember John as the hardest working guy in the kitchen. There was nothing that rattled him and even when we were under-staffed and overwhelmed John always had it under control and helped us through. His dedication to being a chef inspired me to really look for something in my life that I can love to do as much as he loved to cook. But outside of the kitchen is where I most fondly remember John. After a long night we would always gather outside the kitchen and just have a beer and talk. I can't remember what we talked about I don't remember what he said but just hanging out on a crisp fall night with the guys fooling around and laughing were some of the best times I have had . In those moments I wasn't a guy who couldn't find a job I wasn't a guy who was lost in the world. In those moments I was just a guy having a beer with a friend and that turned out to be what I needed the most.

I got a job after a few months at the Coveleigh and I never saw John again. I heard about his passing about a year ago and I was deeply saddened. I couldn't believe that he was gone. I looked online for as much information as I could find about him and what he had done for the past few years.

I read about his fight with cancer and how he battled all the way through and never gave up. It reminded me of my mother's lost battle with cancer and how hard it was on loved ones. But in my saddness I thought about those times at the Coveleigh and I couldn't help but smile. I thought if my memories of John could Mike me smile I know his memory must also bring happiness to his family and friends. If being around John all those years ago could bring the life back in me in such a short time he must have really brought the life out of the people who were close to him and spent a lot of time around him. That was just John he inspired all who were around him.

I turned 30 this year. When I tell people my age they snicker and say "oh you're getting old" and imply the good times are over. I always tell those people that I am thankful that I am 30 and that some people don't make it this far. Right after I say that I think of John a good man who we lost too soon.

I found this website tonight and it seems I was right about John touching people's lives and I realized that we didn't lose John and he is still apart of so many peoples lives.

I wasn't sure if I should write this or not but I wanted those who loved him to know that he touched many people's lives even those who were only in his for a very short time.

So John here's to you. I will remember those times at the Coveleigh for the rest of my life and that makes you a small part of everything I am. I just wanted you to know how much those times meant to me and how thankful I am that you were a part of my life and that you're also a part of my future.

Art School Girl.... props to Max B.

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Mon, 24 May 2010 20:21:00 +0000

I saw you walking out of F.I.T and as soon as your eyes hit me I knew

You're no witch,

You're no wench,
You're like Nora with better fashion sense,
So I phone Rob Cellets
And I'm building up my confidence.

Respect to your work,
You're an artist, I'm a silly jerk.
I think that dynamic could work.
I have a total crush on you
And I can't let it go
if only I could let you know.

When we spoke, no joke
I started shedding slutty girls like snakeskin,
My collection acquired through shallow misdirection
And as I walk tonight,
West coast sky daring me to try,
I feel alive tonight,
The possibility that I'm your guy.

Though I suffer from perplexia
And mild manorexia,
My hair cannot commit to
one popular style or music
And though they all claim
That a girl won't take this boy's last name
and I'll end up divorced and estranged.
I'm counting on you.

Friday Night Tips

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Fri, 21 May 2010 19:53:00 +0000

OK now some of you out there have plans that involve women tonight and I wanted to give you some last minute tips because you go and make fools of yourselves. If you are lucky enough to being going on a second, third or fourth date tonight let me give you some advice.

First off, I am assuming your first date went well and you have passed the crucial stage of convincing her that you are indeed a funny, nice responsible guy and might not be a psycho. Cause as well all know, people hold back the crazy until a month into the relationship. So since this is the second date you have to take her somewhere else other than the local bar or Starbucks. This might involve dinner or a movie (save that "look at me, I am so cultured museum date for a later time" Since there are no good movies out (except Human Centipede) and the weather is nice. You most likely will be going to an establishment with outdoor seating. Now forget everything you think you know and just follow these rules.

#1- You are taking her out, so pay for everything. Money is meant to be spent and there is nothing better to spend money on than a woman. You will have plenty of time to piss away your money on beer and your 40th pair of jeans another time.

#2- Don't order like you would normally order. You are not alone, so everything you do will be watched, analyzed and then overreacted too. Why? because that's what women do! So if you like 5 cherries in you coke or usually drink a couple shots of Jameson during the appetizers, hold off on that. Oh and don't drink too much, in fact order one beer or wine and that's it. You will most likely have a couple drinks after dinner and then you will end up getting sloppy and try to molester her.

#3- Do not look at your phone during dinner and talk to her and actually be interested. It is really fucking insulting to check your phone when you are supposed to be getting to know someone. You can wait until later to read about all the skanks at the Mad River happy hour. Just sit there and listen to her like a real person would and let the conversation flow. Before your know it you will having pistachio bread pudding and thinking you might get to see her naked later.

Which brings me to #4. Look if the magic is there, then go for it, but otherwise try to refrain from hounding her for some loving. You are much better off with someone who respects herself enough to wait for the right time. Besides if she has nothing else to offer you this early in the relationship besides sex, it's not going to work out anyway.

So man up, manner up and act like a NY gentlemen.

Oh and as for you first daters out there, I will let KSK give you the wisdom.

Go get dinner, and then tell her that we have tickets to some event. Only…you don’t. So after dinner, you go, “Oh, crap, I left an item pertinent to this event in my apartment.” So you both go to your apartment. You both walk in and you offer her a drink. She sits on the couch. You pour. She takes the drink. You make a nice toast (”To yoga!” maybe). You take a drink. She takes a drink. You smile. You say, “You’re just so much fun to be with.” And then as you move in for a liplock, reach behind her head with her free hand and yank the shit out of her hair while screaming “GIMME THE FUCKING LAUNCH CODES NOW!” It also helps if your apartment is clean.

.

Belt

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Thu, 20 May 2010 20:48:00 +0000

Old School Dan Pics for you

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Thu, 20 May 2010 04:07:00 +0000

So tough!!!

Look at how high my hair is in this pic

This is when I was young and sexy!

and of course the infamous NY Times picture

11.11

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Thu, 20 May 2010 03:52:00 +0000

So I turn over and look at the clock, its 11:11. I turn again, look out the window above my bed and wish on the one star I see in the sky. “I wish I get a girl, I wish I get a girlfriend.. I wish I get a life”. I am not exactly sure who I am asking to grant me this wish. Is it god? Is it my mom? Maybe it’s just for anyone who will listen. I turn back over in my bed and start thinking. Thinking about how it all ended up this way. My room is spacious and dark. There is an empty bed on the other side that my younger brother used to sleep in. But he moved into my older brother’s room this year after he left for school. I don’t think he’s coming back. He couldn’t wait to get of this mad house; it’s the only way he can deal with it. I don’t really blame him, but I sure will miss him. My younger brother is out somewhere doing something he shouldn’t be. He really doesn’t care about anything anymore and loves to piss off my father. He does it on purpose now, I am not sure why and I won’t ask him. He is supposed to be home by 2 but I know he won’t be. My father will wake up and 2:15 and barge into my room to scream at me for him not being home. This is why I don’t sleep anymore. I am always nervous that something is going to happen to anger my father, so I just lie awake.

But tonight isn’t about my father or my brothers, it’s about me. You see I am in love with a girl named Catie, only she doesn’t know it. Wait I can’t talk about this right now. I need a cigarette, it calms me down. Now my family doesn’t know that I smoke, or maybe they do, but I don’t know they know. I can’t smoke in the house so I always walk our dog Gloria, have a cigarette and contemplate my life. Gloria is my best friend. She is always happy to see me and loves to walk with me. She gives the best advice, never judges me or thinks I’m a loser for having no friends. Just strolls down the silent street with me and scares off the raccoons. I go downstairs and she’s sleeping on the couch. God she is so cute, short hair, brown and white pit-bull mutt. A friend of ours found her on the street and against my dad’s will, we took her in. I was very surprised that he caved and let my mom convince him to take her. I didn’t find out until later that she did this because she knew she was sick.

I don’t feel bad waking up Gloria because I know that she likes walking with me. She gets right up, licks me and wags her tail .. I get her leash and she goes into a complete frenzy. Ah Gloria, never lets me down. We walk outside and the cool Fall air hits my face as I walk across our yard. I love the way October feels, I wish the orange would stay forever. I wait until I get to the corner to fire up my Camel light and walk up Kane ave. The first drag makes me numb. Numb to everything inside me that has been driving me crazy. My head starts to feel light and for the next 20 seconds the feeling is amazing, better than any drug has every made me feel. The cigarette high is the best high in the world, for those few seconds, I feel free. It’s quieter than usually tonight and I don’t see any lights on at Ava’s house. Ava is a girl I know from school and she is best friends with Catie. I don’t think she knows that I love Catie. To me it’s obvious, but sometimes girls can’t see what’s right in front of them or maybe I am expecting too much. I keep forgetting that Catie can’t see what I feel and I need to tell her. But I can’t. I have loved her for over a year now, since the first time she talked to me in English class. In was a rare class where we had alphabetically assigned seats and she sat right in front of me. I remember her walking into class. Her long blond hair, crystal blue eyes and beautiful smile. She sat down turned around, smiled at me and said “hey cutie” and my heart melted. I had never felt this way about anyone before…ever. I haven’t had many relationships before; in fact I haven’t had any relationships before and had never been in love. I can’t even explain it how it feels. It was the first time in my life I was sure of something. It just feels so good to be near her. I just want her to be happy and I want to be the one who makes her happy.

Ever since that day she has been the reason for my existence. She is the reason I come to school and if she’s not there I am completely miserable. She once left a note in my locker and I felt like I won the lottery. I keep it in a box on my desk now. I try to spend as much time with Catie as possible, but it’s not a lot. See she has a boyfriend, but he doesn’t treat her right. I hope she can see this one day and realize that she would be better off without him and want to be with me. I hope sees that I’d treat her like a queen.

So we are almost back to my house and Gloria looks tired. I glance out to the street and see no signs of my brother coming home tonight. I guess it’s just going to be another night awake trying to calm down my dad. But who knows, maybe tomorrow will be different. Maybe tomorrow will be the day my Dad will be normal again. The day my younger brother stops doing drugs. The day my older brother calls me to talk or the day Catie will see how much I care for her. If it’s not… then it’s just another night alone with Gloria, cigarettes and 11:11.

Dreams

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Wed, 19 May 2010 20:13:00 +0000

The other night I had a dream that my friend Laurie was a demon. Not just any demon, a bad-ass scary take over the world demon. Throughout the dream I was scared that Laurie the demon would kill me but also sad that my dear friend Laurie was now indeed a demon. At the end of the dream, I found myself in a situation where somehow we would be able to un-demon Laurie by going back in time to change something. All demon Laurie had to do was choose which scenario to redo. But Laurie did not choose the the path to un-demon herself ( I guess you can't blame her, she is a demon) and I awoke screaming " No Laurie no, not that one." Now this is not the first time I have woke up screaming a girls name begging her to stop ( that story might be posted later on) but still this was more traumatic because demon Laurie is just not as cool as regular Laurie. Laurie, is you are reading this please call me and confirm that you indeed are not a demon.

Thank you

Dan

I am as smart as a wizard!

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Tue, 18 May 2010 21:14:00 +0000

Alright its Dan is the smartest man alive time where I answer your questions and solve all the problems of the world.. I have combined the premise of two things I love reading, Drew Magary’s funbag and GQ’s style list to bring you chicks and clothing advice because of course I am an expert at both.

Onward to your questions

Dan:

Two things, first I work in a fairly young office full of hipsters but I can’t pull of the balance between business and casual. When I wear a suit I feel old, but when I wear jeans, I feel underdressed. Where’s the middle ground. Second, I have recently re-connected with a girl I hooked up with a few months ago. I don’t really like her, but she has great breasts. I would try for a friends with benefits things, but she is so annoying I can’t stand her. Should I still hook up with her even though I know I will have to break off all contact after a couple late night romps?

Clavicle kissing Clive

First off Clive, the key to causal professional dress is to not be the most dressed up and to not look like the biggest bum in the office. So if you wear jeans to work, mix in a tie and good shoes. If you wear pants, you can throw on a sweater and some boots. You always have to wear at least one thing that shows you care. As for this girl, well you know it’s going to suck when you tell her you don’t want to see again, but fine breasts are very rare. Did you know that in some countries they can cure disease and relieve pain? It’s true, just rest them on your eyes and all the pain goes away. So I say go motor-boating and then tell her you fell in love with a co-worker or something when you’re done with her

Dan

Clothes first, Is it ok to wear a white tie with a black shirt to a formal affair? I think it looks sharp. Chicks, I have been seeing this girl for 6 months or so and I really like her, but recently she started doing something really strange .A couple of weeks ago, we went out and got drunk and started to go at it. We were both getting a little adventurous which I am down for, but then she reached down, grabbed my underwear and started sniffing it and not a short, “does this smell” sniff, but she was really inhaling it. Then she pulled me close to her and asked me to kiss here while she wore the underwear on her head. I kind of lost the mood after that.

- Balls out Brendan

Dood you can’t wear a white tie with a black shirt, unless you are in a punk band ,are a waiter or a complete douche-bag. Go no tie with a black shirt or if you have to wear red, then you will only be a partial douche-bag. As for the drawer sniffing, it’s not really that bad. Maybe she has a fart fetish? Or really gets off pretending she’s a ghost. If you like her, then you should talk about it and compromise. You might also be able to pull off a really nice Ghostbuster role play fantasy too. Bonus.

And finally

Dan

My girlfriend and I just got a new cat and she is obsessed with it. It’s gotten so bad that she wants the cat in the bed during sex. I wouldn’t mind it that much except the cat hates me and I am afraid it’s going to bite off my penis. What should I do? Also what’s your take robes?

-Party Marty

Cats are fucking evil man and I bet that cat can’t wait to try to slice off your wiener. You need to get rid of that thing and fast. Take it to the pound and say you found it in the park offering candy to children and picking the flowers. They will put that think down for sure. I used to hate robes, but my bro got me one as a gift for being his best man. Now I sit around in robe pretending to be a rich, snotty asshole, too good for clothes and towels. How dare such a rag touch this privileged skin.

Fine!!!1

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Tue, 18 May 2010 20:23:00 +0000

Ok so I get all your requests for the dating stories. I really really want to move on from those but since you are loyal to this blog I will be loyal to you and bring them back. In fact I will even do you one better. Most of you know all the stories already, so I have decided to to go back in time and re-live the dates and give you a running blog. Unbeknown to most, our office has a secret room that allows time travel. What was that? You want to know how it works? Look you don't ask a wizard how his wand works, you take his word for it and watch him turn shit into blueberry cobbler (mmm cobbler). I don't know how it works, it just does. So tomorrow I will be going back in time and give you real time details of the infamous " Dirty apartment" girl so stay tuned. In the meantime, enjoy the mailbag that's coming.

Animal Sacrifice Friday

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Fri, 14 May 2010 00:53:00 +0000

Now I don't want to get all the PETA people in a stir but tomorrow at work is animal sacrifice friday. Orginally it was blazer friday where all the guys in our office where going to wear blazers, but I am struggling with a project and I need help from the pitching gods and that requires an animal sacrifice. Now normally I would go for something big like a baby elephant or albino zebra, but I don't have that kind of time. So tomorrow we will be sacrificing a goldfish to the gods so that I can get bookings for a project. I wanted it to be a hamster but the people in my office are kind of squimish and kind of pansies. They wouldn't even go see The Human Centipede with me last Friday and I offered to pay and get them Goobers or Snowcaps. What kind of person doesn't go for free snowcaps. So anyway because of them we will be going with the goldfish and this is not the first time a goldfish has lost his life at the office. There is currently an open murder investigation for Francoise the goldfish.

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Fri, 14 May 2010 00:29:00 +0000

I've changed my mind so much I can't even trust it. My mind changes me so much I can't even trust myself.

So I claim I am not excited with my life anymore, so I blame this town, this job these friends, but the truth is it's myself. So I am trying to understand myself and pinpoint where I am but when I finally get it figured out, I change the whole damn plan.

I want to be like Chris Conley and free myself from the ups and downs, to shed this skin and start over. But every time I cut the rope and run, it seems to get tangled around my neck and the noose get's tighter and tigher until I can't breathe, can't move and I'm stuck, going no where and seeing the world pass me by. But this is not a sad story, I know what it feels like to be free and I know I need to get there. I have been to the top and that's where I belong. I just need a little guidance and to belief that I am who I think I am and can be who I want to be. In the book i just read, there was a line that said the hardest part about being a writer is believing you are a writer. I know who I am... but will I finally start believing it?

Sunday night confession

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Mon, 10 May 2010 01:15:00 +0000

New theme for the blog, it's Sunday night confession time. It doesn't have to be something embarassing or bad, just something you have never told anyone. Here it goes, when I am on a plane and it's about to take off I listen to Fade into you and wild horses by Mazzy Star. It comforts me and the thoughts I have about the plane crashing. Some how those songs make me feel like I am ok with dying.

Mother's Day

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Mon, 10 May 2010 01:09:00 +0000

A Mother's day card I never sent.

A lot of time has passed
and we've been through many changes
Change has given us a chance to grow
and to see many different places
But even though new people have
replaced your familar face
you will always remain in my heart
with the stars and sunsets I chase.

I went back and forth on whether I wanted to send this card. I finally decided that enough time has passed and I should cut the ties to some people I love that are no longer a part of my life. No one stays around forever and sometimes if you hold on too long your memories get jaded.

Lonliness

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Sat, 08 May 2010 02:40:00 +0000

We received a letter from the Singles Meeting Organization on the topic of lonliness and we are glad to comply.

Sure the organization knows what lonliness is. It is the last cornflake in a bowl of cereal. It is the last drop of milk in the container. It is a prisoner in solitary confinement; it is the new kid in school. Lonliness is coming to this country and not speaking the language. It is missing the field goal to lose the Super Bowl, striking out in the bottom of the ninth, seeing someone you love but not expressing your feelings. Lonliness is watching your mother leave and never come back. Lonliness is the smell of a hospital a loved one is on. It is listening to a sad song, being by yourself on New Years Eve. It's watching your children leave for school and coming home to an empty house. Lonliness is sitting in the dark contemplating suicide with your Singles Meeting Organization calander sitting on your desk.

I wrote this 10 years ago in Oswego and it was published in the Great Lakes Review. I gave a copy to my dad and months later he came up to me out of nowhere and told me that he never ever thought about suicide thinking the piece was about him, but it was really about me.

Blogs you should Read

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Sat, 08 May 2010 02:38:00 +0000

Check these out

http://christinejessie.blogspot.com/

www.dessertmaven.com

Animal Monday

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 03:23:00 +0000

Animal monday has returned! So yesterday I went to the Central park zoo. It's really not much of a zoo, but hey you can't complain when it comes to zoo's and they have penquins. Here is a quick recap of what I saw

More little kids at the zoo than animals.

Two turtles having sex and countless parents feeling uncomfortable when their kids ask them what the turtles are doing.

Many different types of birds flying around in too small spaces.

Nonchachalant snow monkeys eating bugs of each other.

A red panda that had the face of a racoon which was cute and a bit freaky at the same time.

A snow lepoard with a abnormally large tail

Depressed polar bears

Really nice penquins... they really never let you down. If you ever think life is not worth living, go check out the penquins they will talk you out of it.

Really happy sea lions swimming in circles.

That about sums up all the animals at the zoo. There is an otter in the children's zoo but we where not going to pay to see it.

Tomorrow I will be kicking off a new series so keep reading or start reading.

Riverboat goodness

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Thu, 16 Jul 2009 16:56:00 +0000

You wouldn't know me depression kicks in, when panic's attacking and I miss medicine
When my neck can't hold up my head and I just can't get out of bed
When you see me uncomfortably chain smoking, trying to force up a smile
Then I'm slippin' (slippin') again

And I don't wanna drag no one down with my problem
That's in my head
I'll probably snap out but I just don't know when

Apologies from me
This is nothing that I want you to see
Trying to drown out that ringing voice
Mike, give it up, give it up
Like a pick in a hollow body
Give it up, give it up, give it up down
Into the sea, tentacles got me by the neck and they're pulling me down

I try to keep in check
Stay on top, teeter tot won't balance I guess
Every time I get one under control the rest start rising and then
I stay shut up in my home
Agoraphobic and alone
'Til with bit lip, fuck it, I gotta try
Hands clenching, sweating,
Don't want no one to see in my mind
It's not a pretty sight
The right half don't work and the screws aren't tight

Apologies from me
This is nothing that I want you to see
Trying to drown out that ringing voice
Mike, give it up, give it up
Like a pick in a hollow body
Give it up, give it up, give it up down
Into the sea, tentacles got me by the neck and they're pulling me do

Sunday Night's are always quiet.

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 03:15:00 +0000

We may have a reason to feel sorry for ourselves, but not a right.

You have got to get to your closed doors before your open ones.

It's not enough to arise, you have to shine.

Joel Osteen

Joel is my favorite preacher. He focus on being positive and not religion, despite all the opening and closing prayers. I can only watch him once a month or so though because he repeats the same shit over and over and once a month is enough to hear that God will take care of you. The truth is that you can either be positive or negative in every situation that comes your way. Even if you're dying, you can feel sorry for yourself or say fuck it and live out your last days with style. But what Joel doesn't tell you is that it's fuckin hard to always try to be positive about things. The world is built for sadness, insecurity and fear. Since we were babies these feeling get installed in us and it's a natural reaction at this point. It's our first reaction and sometimes it takes awhile to move past it... sometimes we never move past it. You have to learn to ignore it, or not care. You have to forget everything you know and unlearn what you've learned. If you can't do that, well then there's only one other alternative... get as fucked up as possible all the time and stop caring about everything. That's dangerous though and sometimes makes you lose site of your pain. But pain never goes away, it's always there. You have to make the pain a part of you to deal with it. Good Luck.

SOD

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Sat, 06 Jun 2009 12:42:00 +0000

To all the given ups, the special needs crew. To all those who were told "we didn't need you." To all the people who are eating all alone, you know something fucked that kid up good. To all those who wake up at dawn, underpayed and then shit upon. To all my friends who never had a chance. To those who closed their eyes, thinking they'd be better off...for now. To those who felt that the gods kept them from getting out, this town.To spite as a reason.To clothes out of season.To those stuck in caskets as nails hammer in.

Just keep screaming out...I'm still not dead.To the ugly ones with the bad teeth, staring at the pretty people that they can't meet. Staring at the magazines on the endcaps, that fuck your head up good. To all those buried in the ground, God knows I wish you were around, to laugh and cuss about what's going down. To those who stand watching the last bus as it drives away...again. To those who see that by not playing and not giving in...they win.To have no good reason,To no cuts and lesions.And to the confusion of our enemies.

Just keep screaming out...I'm still not dead.Don't bury me yet.

Love lost

noreply@blogger.com (Dan) — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 02:09:00 +0000

I'm starting to think that god is messing with me, here a taste of good stuff, now give it back. A firend said this to me today and honestly I feel the same way every single day I wake up in the morning. But that's life, god gives and god takes away it's how you handle it that makes you the man you are and gets you one step closer to becoming the man you want to be.