SIMON SAYS

It's the little things

2013-10-04T18:15:00.000-07:00

My my but it's been along time since I've had the time to sit down and actually post something! But I have been thinking, and reflecting back on something that happened a while back. The family was together celebrating Father's day, and somehow the subject came up of the husbands and wives and how one would fair without the other. My mom and dad got misty eyed and declared that they would prefer to "go together" because neither of them had a clue as to how they would get by without the other. It was quite an emotional moment, one that I had to put a stop to with the declaration that it was time for cake, before I found myself balling my head off. It made me think of another time, back in 2008. My mom had suffered two heart attacks and was in the hospital in intensive cardiac care for almost a month. The family more or less took shifts, different ones of us showing up at different times through the day, but my dad was there every day from the moment he got up until the nurses kindly kicked him out and told him to go home and get some much needed sleep. There was one day, when I was there, but in the waiting room feeding my 3 week old daughter, that Jeopardy came on. Jeopardy is one of my mom and dad's favorite shows. They love the intellectual challenge and like learning new things. So, I went to get my dad out of mom's room to watch, thinking it would lift his spirits. My dad stood there and watched a while and I said "Aren't you glad I came to get you, Dad, so you could see your show?" He looked at me, and I saw tears streaming down his face, and he said "It's just not the same without her." Understand, my dad is not an emotional kind of guy, and I don't believe I'd ever seen him cry before. It broke my heart. It also made me realize the deep, abiding connection that existed between this man and woman who had spent the last fifty plus years together, living life side by side day in and day out. I realized then and there that it's the little things that matter most. The daily interactions that we often don't even notice that build a lasting connection. Thankfully, mom and dad are still watching Jeopardy together, and all the other little things that go to make up a life.

Happy Pretty Dandelions

2013-05-02T22:25:00.000-07:00

It's that time of year. The days are getting longer and warmer, the birds are back, everything turned vibrant green almost overnight- spring has sprung. Along with the vibrant green grass comes that inevitable pest- the dandelion. They pop up, seemingly multiplying by the dozens in seconds. My 4 year old daughter has been delightedly bringing me dandelions by the cute little fistful each and every morning lately, and sometimes in the afternoon. She calls them "sunflowers." I give her a hug and a kiss and a big thank you and promptly put them in water and place them on the kitchen window sill where I know she will be checking for them, to make sure they are on prominent display. One day recently my son was home when Lauren excitedly made her presentation of dandelions. He opened his mouth and I knew he was going to tell her that they are just weeds and that she shouldn't bother to bring them to me. I quickly, before he could get all the words out, shushed him, gave Lauren a big thank you and sent her on her merry way. Jackson asked me why on earth I was acting so excited about some weeds, and why was I putting them on display for heaven's sake? I looked him in the eye and explained that I did the same thing for him when he was her age. You see, a child's innocence is lost all to quickly, and I prefer to hold onto it for as long as possible. Lauren sees pretty little brightly colored yellow "sunflowers" where we grown ups see annoying weeds. I am so happy that in her innocent, as yet unspoiled vision she has a beautiful bouquet, as fine as any roses you could pick. As adults maybe we should be more aware of "setting our kids straight" and less ready to point out all the "weeds" in life. Like the dandelions, they'll inevitably pop up, and sometimes multiply seemingly overnight. Let them see the "sunflowers" for as long as they can! They'll find out about the weeds soon enough. Instead, let's teach them how to stop and smell the dandelions!

Tragedy Brings out the Best In Us

2013-04-16T13:20:00.001-07:00

Well, it's been awhile. I guess I have been very busy, so it's been a while since my last post. But, given the events of yesterday, I am inspired to reflect and comment. I returned home yesterday after picking my kids up from school, on a beautiful spring day, to turn on the television and be greeted by horrific scenes of chaos and devastating injuries. I stood, frozen, watching in horror as the scene unfolded. We have had some awful things happen in our country lately. Shootings, sinkholes, now a bombing. The events are tragic and unfortunate, however, they seem also to give us the opportunity to show the best side of human nature in the midst of the chaos. I saw a quote, from Mr. Rogers, which I posted on my Facebook page, in which he talked about his mother telling him to watch for the "helpers" when seeing bad situations. There are always helpers there, she said, helping whomever is in trouble. That is what you need to focus on in the face of tragedy- how many people are stepping up and helping and how they outnumber the bad guys. I thought this was a wonderful point and I thought immediately of recent events and the people who went running towards the sound of gunfire or towards the sound of explosions to see what was happening and how they could help. Most people's natural instinct would be to run FROM danger, not TOWARDS it, but there are always every day heroes who defy instinct and logic and jump into the fray. Thank God for them! It is in hearing these stories of heroism that we are given hope for the future, and the reassurance that the vast majority of people on the planet are good, kind and loving people who genuinely care for their fellow man. When you see these "helpers" act during times of stress and devastation, and then witness the outpouring of love and care, in the form of actual physical assistance, financial assistance, and emotional encouragement in the aftermath of a tragedy your faith in humanity is renewed, and you remember that the good guys outnumber the bad and that evil cannot triumph in the face of true goodness. God Bless the Helpers!

Relax!

2013-01-30T20:20:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite shows to watch is House Hunters International on HGTV. I am fascinated by all the people, places and cultures, and find it interesting to see what kind of real estate you can get for what kind of money in different countries. It always fascinates me to see how much smaller houses and apartments are in most foreign countries compared to the U.S. We are pretty spoiled here! It is quite different from the regular House Hunters, which takes place around the country, but always in the U.S. Here people are expecting big rooms, big yards and all the amenities. One room many houses feature is the "formal" dining room. This is, in my personal observation, a wasted space for many folks. It is a sad commentary on the pace of our society today. I notice that often people who are moving from one country to another are looking for a "slower, more relaxed" pace of life. People have become so busy that it seems that they often feel like a hamster on a wheel and sometimes they just want to jump off. My question is this: why should we have to move to or vacation in another country in order to relax? Why can't we slow down and enjoy our lives here? Have we really allowed our lives to become so scheduled that we seriously can't relax? I understand the role of a vacation- a change of scenery, a break from work and routine, a chance to learn something new and experience something different. That's great, but here is my proposal: take back your "formal" dining room! Make family dinner a priority! Don't just save the dining room for special occasions and holidays! Turn on the lights, set the table and have family dinner! Even if you eat take out on the "good" china, the important thing is that you take the time to sit down and eat and talk and reconnect. Then, after dinner, take back the bathroom! Forget "jumping" in the shower! Fill up that tub, put some bubbles in it and take a good, long soak- with a glass of wine, with a good book, or with your spouse! This is the perfect time of year to enjoy home and hearth. Take back your home! Cook dinner in that gourmet kitchen. Eat it in the dining room. Take that bath. Build a fire in the fireplace and sit in front of the crackling, popping warmth and play some board games as a family. Curl up on the couch and read a book. Take back your house and your life! Don't let the outside world constantly dictate the pace of your life! Slow down and enjoy the simple pleasures! Don't wait until "things slow down" instead take hold of the wheel and take a turn into Restville. Do it today! You can thank me later...when you're happy and relaxed!

Happy Thanksgiving!

2012-11-21T21:51:00.000-08:00

In case you haven't yet picked up on it, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I love it because it is strictly American, and it is about thanking God for our blessings, slowing down and taking time to be with family and friends. No retail frenzy, no gift selection stress, no debt accumulation or any of those other things that have commercialized Christmas and taken the attention off of Jesus where it should be. Thanksgiving is also about food, which is definitely a favorite subject of mine!
This year, I would like to list some of the things I am grateful for aside from the obvious health, home, family, and friends. So, here goes: I am thankful for a fire in the fire place on a cold snowy day, hot tea with honey, chocolate chip cookies, purring kitties, a hot bubble bath, a new pair of shoes that are hot looking AND comfortable, a pair of jeans that make your butt look great, a soft bath towel, the smell of fabric softener, clean cool sheets, a beautiful sunset, a new recipe that isn't too hard and tastes wonderful and becomes a standby, coffee in the morning, your kids telling you they love you, your parents telling you they're proud of you, your husband bringing you a present for no special reason, fuzzy slippers, lightening bugs, beautiful sunsets, butterflies, comfy couches, the smell of a roasting chicken, the smell of a sizzling steak, a great hair cut, just been to the dentist clean teeth, a good book, a new cookbook full of great recipes and beautiful pictures, movie popcorn, fall leaves, spring tulips, summer thunderstorms, and fresh winter snow, an ice cold Coca Cola, Christmas cookies, a good soap opera plot, the ocean,decorating the house for each season, fresh country air, the fact that LaRosa's, Skyline, Graeter's and Montgomery Inn are all here in Cincinnati (YES!) a trip to the zoo, a trip all on my own to the art museum, an evening walk, a fun fast car to drive, snuggling in bed with the hubby and kids and last but not least, a good nights' sleep that lasts well into the morning! Thank you Lord, for the big stuff and the small stuff too! What are the little things that you are thankful for?

If only I am so lucky...

2012-10-04T20:28:00.000-07:00

So, my 80 something parents were coming to my area today to run a couple of errands. They don't come my way too often, so I invited them to lunch. My mother informed me that they had a full agenda for the day, and did not have time to have lunch today. What a hoot! I laughed to my husband that I thought it was hysterical that my "elderly" parents didn't have time to stop for lunch! Now, if you were to meet my parents, you would never guess that they're in their 80's. They look great, and despite some of the usual health issues one faces with age, they get around great, still live on their own, drive, keep a full schedule of activities, including babysitting my young children etc. They are pretty damned impressive. I always tease my mom when she complains of being too busy that many people her age are drooling on themselves somewhere with no clue who or where they are, so she should be glad that she's so busy, and still capable of doing so much. She replies with the inquiry "Isn't there any happy medium? It's either running around like crazy or drooling on myself?!" To which I respond "Yes. Those are your choices, so be happy your busy!" In truth, there are many stages in between. We all know people who are old beyond their years- those who seem "old and crotchety" way before their time. We also all know people who are "young at heart" and seem not to act anywhere near their age. I am happy to say my parents fall into the latter category. It's ironic, actually, because my parents had me later in life, so growing up, my friends parents were all quite a bit younger than mine, and I remember thinking that it wasn't fair, because they would have a lot more time with their parents than I would with mine. The reality is that some of those "young" parents have been gone for years now, due to cancer, car accidents, or other accidents or illnesses, and my parents are both still here with me, thank God. It just goes to show that one never knows. None of us know how long we have to enjoy earthly pleasures with our family and friends, so we must make the most of all of the opportunities that come our way. And I don't mean just fabulous opportunities for world travel, fame and fortune, but every day opportunities like watching a beautiful sunset with your spouse or cheering your child on as they accomplish a goal or having dinner with a good friend or collecting leaves on a gorgeous fall day or eating a bowl of your favorite ice cream or having lunch with your busy parents...it doesn't have to be unusual or expensive or important to anyone else, it just needs to be a moment noticed by you, where you take a deep breath and live in the moment and thank God for your blessings. I hope, that if I get to live as long as my parents have, that I can be young at heart like they are, sucking every bit of life out of this world like they do, and telling MY children that I am just too busy, we will have to do lunch another day!

Olympic Fever

2012-08-07T19:36:00.001-07:00

What is it about the Olympics that fascinates the world? People suddenly perch on the edge of their seats cheering for someone they never heard of, from a country they never heard of, participating in a sport that they probably rarely, if ever, watch. Is it the chance to see a city in another place? Seeing the years of training that go into an Olympic athlete? The amazing physiques honed by hours of practice? Just having something different to watch on late night t.v.? I believe that the number one draw of the Olympics is watching the triumph of the human spirit. Seeing someone push past the limitations of their body and travel to another plane of reality where they seemingly don't feel the sweat and blood and pain but only focus on the reward. And by reward I don't necessarily mean a medal. An athlete may come in in 8th place but achieve a personal best. It's also not just about personal triumph, but the honor of representing your country, your home, your "people" in a positive light to the rest of the world. When we see someone pushing, and sweating and struggling, are we thinking about the fact that they are from a country whose policies we don't agree with, or a religion we don't understand? No. The idea of hard work and excellence in what you do is a universally admired virtue. Let us all learn a lesson from the athletes and strive to excel in whatever we do.

KEEP THE FLAME BURNING!

What's old is new again...

2012-07-19T21:40:00.000-07:00

Going green. Organic produce. Locally sourced meat. Is it a new fad? A lasting trend? My Dad laughs at the whole notion. The idea that this is something new and hip is laughable to him because he has been living this way his whole life. You see, my father grew up on the land where I now live, and has been a farmer all of his life. This land has been in my family for 108 years, most of them as a fully functional self-sustaining farm. My great-Grandfather and Grandfather had orchards, hay fields, crops, gardens, dairy cattle, pigs, chickens, sheep, goats...everything they needed to put food on the table. My Dad has always said that they didn't know when the Great Depression hit because, for one, they never had much, and secondly, they were always very self-sufficient, fulfilling their own needs through their own hard work. They had meat, eggs, vegetables, fruits, milk and all manner of farm fresh vittles to fill their bellies. I have seen pictures of the autumn hog butchering which was done each year to provide meat for the coming winter- pictures of my great-Grandmother stuffing sausages right in the front yard only moments after the hog made the ultimate sacrifice. It doesn't get fresher than that! Local, organic, and farm fresh weren't buzzwords, it was simply the way things were done. Equipment was reused and re-purposed, crops were rotated, animals were respected and every part of every plant and animal was used for something. Nothing was wasted. So, you see, while this idea is very hip right now, it is by no means new. I for one hope that it is also not a "fad" but rather a trend towards more thoughtful living. Being aware of what we eat and where it comes from. Mindful consumption, not mass consumption of mass produced foodstuffs full of ingredients we can't even pronounce and which are likely not good for our bodies. Whether it means that you plant a garden or pot a few herbs in a window sill planter; visit the local farmers market or buy locally sourced produce at your supermarket; buy a few chickens or ask your butcher where his meat comes from, the point is to be invested in your food as my ancestors were. They did it not because it was popular, but because it was the way things were done. It can be the way things are done in your house too.

Sweet sweet freedom!

2012-07-04T22:24:00.001-07:00

Today we celebrated the Fourth of July. We celebrated in the usual fashion- stop by the fireworks store and go WAY over budget buying fun explosive things, go to my Mom and Dad's and grill out, make homemade ice cream (my favorite part!!!) and set off some fireworks. Then, bellies full and kids thrilled with the results of the explosions, we head home. We talked about our country and how hard folks have fought both here and abroad to make it strong and free, we asked for a special blessing for those in our military and then we went on our merry way, to not think about it as often as we should. While I was getting ready to go today my husband, in his usual fashion, was channel surfing. I noticed he was watching "Glory" which is a really great movie about a black regiment serving in the Civil War and some piece of idiocy called "Kendra on Top," about a former Playboy Playmate and her husband. I was ready to ask him what on earth he was watching some stupid reality show about some stupid people I couldn't care less about when it hit me: that's what makes this country great! That there is some stupid marathon of some ridiculous reality show on on the 4th of July is a perfect example of why America is great! No one is going to tell the station they can't broadcast such crap, and no one is going to tell you that you can't watch that crap all day if you want to. (Well except maybe your wife!) I hate reality shows. I find them to be pointless, mindless and a complete waste of time. Frankly, who cares what these morons are doing with their time?! But there are those who don't agree with me and who become addicted to this show or that. They can have at it! More power to them! (As long as they don't expect me to watch!) But, that's just what is so great about America- if people want to be idiots, they are free to do so! So, march on you morons! You keep watching your Kendra on Top and your Jersey Shores and those Kardashians! I personally will be watching cooking shows and history specials. Ain't diversity grand?!

PBS FOREVER, REALITY T.V. NEVER!

SAVOR THE SMALL STUFF

2012-03-10T22:08:00.000-08:00

My Dad, not the world's biggest optimist, has a response he sometimes uses when someone asks him how he is doing. It is "well, I'm still above grass, so I guess I'm doing pretty good." My Dad is soon to be 88 and by all accounts pretty darn healthy, still working outside, still driving, still doing various social activities and making sure he keeps one eye on my Mom at all times to be sure she stays out of trouble. Trouble, I might add, which I am the one likely to get her into, at least in his opinion. As my parents get older, I think about the fact that no one lives forever, and while I don't want to even think about it, my parents won't live forever either. I honestly don't think a whole lot about my own mortality. I consider myself to be still young and healthy and I have a whole lot of things I want to accomplish before I take off to parts unknown, if you know what I mean. I also have a husband and two small children who need me. The thought of leaving my pristine house and impressionable young babes in the sole care of my husband is too scary! I just know he wouldn't make them make their beds and I am POSITIVE he would never clean the inside of the microwave! Remembering to sign all that paperwork from school? Forget about it! Daily Swiffering? Not gonna happen! But, I digress. The subject here is my mortality. I really thought about my mortality a lot this week. You see, a woman from our parish- not someone I knew well, but someone I did know- well, it's like this: she was diagnosed with cancer and given six months to live. This was around the 20th of February. She died 10 days later, on the 2nd of March. WOW! How the heck do you deal with THAT?! I sat there in church after the announcement of her funeral with my head swimming. How do you face imminent death? How do you prepare your loved ones? How do you attend to all the practical details of wrapping up your life here on earth? How in the world do you say goodbye to your husband, your kids, your parents? How do you prioritize your last 10 days of life? I mean, this is heavy stuff. Now, I am a woman of faith, and I have no doubt of the existence of a loving God and an afterlife of unending joy. I am no saint, but I have no fear of burning in Hell either. So, it's not that I fear death. Death is not an end, it is a "transition" into another kind of life. A better kind promised to me by my loving Father in heaven. So, it's not a fear of death that has me wanting to stick around here for awhile. And, though it does factor in, it's not even the thought of my un-Swiffered house or splattered microwave that gives me pause. It's the little things: kissing my husband. Hugging my kids. Talking to my Mom every day. Celebrating my birthday. Cooking a great meal. Drinking a great glass of wine. Laughing with my girlfriends. Driving a fast car. Hearing my 4 year old sing the whole Little Einsteins theme. Snuggling with my son. Seeing my Dad's face light up when he sees his grandchildren. Talking recipes and politics with my brothers. Listening to a favorite song cranked up loud. Seeing the beautiful sunset from my back porch. The smell of hyacinths. The sound of the ocean. Thunderstorms. And definitely chocolate! I can't imagine having to say good bye to all these things! Is it possible to not fear death, but to fear the absence of seemingly small, silly things like chocolate chip cookies? I would have to say yes. I would hope that I have a long life ahead of me, and that by the time it is time for me to say goodbye I will be so old and worn out that I will be ready to give up chocolate for heaven. I sincerely hope that I will just fall asleep in my favorite chair when I'm 101 or so and simply never wake up. Just peacefully go home to God without a great deal of fuss. I honestly don't know how I would "wrap it up" and get ready to go in just 10 short days. I cannot even fathom what it would be like to try to do that and for my family to face that. But I'll tell you one thing- this ladies' story has made me think long and hard about what is and isn't important. After all, none of us know how long we have. Whether we are young or old, healthy or not, no one knows exactly how much time they have. So we have to make each day count! People say "don't sweat the small stuff." I say it's the small stuff that matters most! It's the little every day things, all piled up on top of one another, that make up a life. Chances are, if you reflect on what's important to you, it won't be lofty goals or spectacular plans that come to the forefront. It will be little things like tucking your kids in at night or having a date night with your husband. These things we can do! We can plan and we can accomplish! For the next 10 days, pick one thing to do, or one place to go, or one thing to eat and SAVOR it! Don't sweat the big stuff! SAVOR THE LITTLE THINGS! In the end, you see, when a life is lived, it's the little things that people remember. You don't hear people say in a eulogy "She had a diversified retirement account" or "she had a Master's degree in chemical engineering." Or "she paid her mortgage on time every month." You hear people say "She was a great Mom." Or "she always had a kind word and a hug for anyone who needed it." "She loved to laugh." "She knew a good bottle of wine when she saw one and she loved to share it with her friends." "She knew more jokes than anybody else I know." "She made the best pumpkin pie ever." "Her smile could light up a room." It's the every day things that matter most. So don't sit around and wait for something fabulous to happen. See the fabulous in today!

SMELL THE ROSES FOREVER, TAKE IT FOR GRANTED NEVER!

Seeing the forest for the trees

2012-01-08T18:38:00.000-08:00

The last Friday of every month our parish does Eucharistic Adoration. For you non-Catholics, that means that the consecrated host, which we believe to be the true body of Jesus, is exposed in a monstrance, which is a special, fancy holder so that folks may come and pray before Jesus, whom we believe is present in the Host. It is a solemn and holy observance. Since we believe in the real presence of Jesus, someone must be in the church the entire time the Blessed Sacrament is exposed, which is 24 hours in our case. So, we have a sign-up sheet, and people sign up for one hour time periods. Some ambitious folks even sign up for more than one time slot. I used to do Eucharistic Adoration every month before I had my daughter, but lately I haven't done it as much. So, when they made the announcement at Christmas mass for Eucharistic Adoration on the 30th, I thought it would be a great time to start up again, and a wonderful way to start the new year. Just me and Jesus, talking and planning and praying about the coming year. So, I left my kids home with Dad and off I went. It is awe inspiring to be the only one in the whole church, sitting there before Jesus. It's quiet, it's peaceful- it's a special time. As I was sitting there praying and reading scripture and thinking, I was admiring the beautiful nativity scene. Trying to imagine what was going through the minds of Mary and Joseph and the shepherds as they gazed upon this little tiny baby who was somehow special, though they did not know just how yet. That's when it occurred to me- the crib and surrounding trees sit in front of where the statue of the Sacred Heart usually is. So, I had to get up and check it out. Was the statue there or did they put it away somewhere? I got up, peeked behind the crib and guess what? The Sacred Heart was there. He was covered up with a cloth, but He was there, hidden behind the tall trees. That was when it hit me...Jesus the Sacred Heart, shrouded in black cloth but ever shining in our hearts. Hidden, but ever-present in our lives. Always there if we only just pull aside the branches and SEE HIM. I decided there was a lesson there. Let 2012 be the year you remember to ask Jesus to be there for you. Ask Him into your life. Let 2012 be the year you "see the forest for the trees."

GOD BLESS US EVERY ONE!

The Prayer of St. Anselm
I seek not to understand in order that I may believe; rather I believe in order that I may understand.

Let's Talk Turkey

2011-11-22T22:09:00.000-08:00

I am glowing with anticipation! This is one of my favorite times of the whole year! I love autumn, when the leaves change and the air grows crisp and one is drawn to the hearth, the crockpot and the down comforter. I love fall because my birthday is in the fall and I love to celebrate another year of staying alive and well. I love fall because of our family tradition of making chili and snickerdoodles and going trick or treating together with my six foot four inch cousin dressed up in his gorilla costume and the kids laughing with sugar coated glee. And, I ADORE Thanksgiving! It is hands down my favorite holiday. I love to watch all the great cooking shows and get tips and recipes and ideas for Thanksgiving meals. I love to get in the kitchen and make good stuff, I love to eat brunch with my husband and kids and watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade on television. (I dream of someday being there in person for the parade!) I like seeing happy stories on the news about people helping folks who don't have as much as they do and who enjoy sharing what they can to make sure everyone has something to be thankful for. I love getting together with my family and eating great food and giving thanks for my many, many blessings. I love the idea that on this one day, regardless of faith or creed, all Americans stop and consider how much they have to be thankful for. Oh, the joy of counting your blessings!
Now, let me tell you what I don't love. In fact, what I loathe. I ABSOLUTELY HATE that this wonderful, beautiful holiday gets overlooked and lost in the black hole of "retail hell." I detest seeing the Christmas ads come out and the stores putting Christmas merchandise out the minute Halloween passes. Throw out a few token turkey plates and napkins and call it a day. I hate that my kids haven't even eaten all their Halloween candy when the toy catalogs start flooding the mailbox. I despise when people are already putting their trees up and doing their Christmas shopping when November has barely been ushered in. Is it really necessary to drag folks away from their families on Thanksgiving night so that some people can hit the stores foaming at the mouth like rabid wolves looking for the "best deals of the season?" Don't even get me started on that one...mall marauders exemplify the worst aspects of humanity.Some stores are even staying open on Thanksgiving day now. It's criminal! Really, what is so awful about waiting a few more days?! We're not talking about a huge chunk of time here people! Let the turkey have his day! Santa will get his time! Can't we just calm down and wait until after Thanksgiving?! I was thrilled to hear Nordstrom come out and say that this year, as in recent years, they will not be decorating for Christmas until after Thanksgiving. HALLELUJAH! One retailer who is willing to give the turkey his due! How about you? Do you love Thanksgiving and see it as a valuable and venerable tradition? If you feel like I do, send retailers a message. Save your Christmas shopping for the Christmas season, and let everyone enjoy turkey day at home with their families being thankful for all their blessings. I, for one, will be thanking God for autumn leaves, fall breezes, warm fires, cozy beds, hot chocolate with marshmallows, fuzzy slippers and folks to enjoy them with.

THANKSGIVING FOREVER, RETAIL DOMINATION NEVER!!!!

Making Do With Less

2011-11-09T20:39:00.000-08:00

Ever been in the bathroom, "doing your business" only to discover that there are exactly 12 squares of toilet paper left on the roll and no access to another roll? Amazing what you can do with those 12 squares isn't it? Sure, you usually use at least double that, but man, how resourceful you can be when absolutely necessary. I think that kind of represents what a lot of us have been having to do for the last couple of years. With the down turn in the economy, we all have been forced to cut back or at least examine and reorder our priorities in one way or another. My husband works in a business that is very subject to the up and downs of the economy. We always have "fat" years and "lean" years. Man were the fat years fun! Indulging all your whims-dinner out at least 3 nights a week, clubs every weekend, biweekly shopping excursions at the mall, weekly salon appointments, fancy foreign vacations...what a blast! But, all good things must come to an end, right? The last couple of years we have had to cut back in different areas. Don't worry, we're not suffering- in fact, we have discovered that some of the things we used to spend our money on are not that hard to live without. Dinners at upscale restaurants, movies in the theater, fancy vacations...those things are definitely fun, but they aren't necessary. If you work at it, you can find plenty of inexpensive or even free fun stuff to do. In fact, we've discovered new happiness in the simple things in life. It's like the kid that gets a fancy toy only to play with the box. My son has made houses, cars, submarines, trains and more out of a plain cardboard box. All he did was engage his imagination. As adults, sometimes we forget to use our imagination, or we use up so much of our energy on the "daily grind" that we are simply to tired to think creatively. However, there are those that when given lemons, know how to make lemonade. The media is full of stories of folks forced into thinking outside the box to cope with the economy- 50 year olds changing careers, moms "extreme couponing," businesses cutting expenses without having to cut employees by doing away with frivolous perks and out of control expense accounts, people carpooling, folks taking "staycations." It's a matter of being resourceful and making the most of limited resources...like that last 12 squares of toilet paper. Amazing what you can do when you have to isn't it?

RESOURCEFULNESS FOREVER, GIVING UP THE GOOD STUFF NEVER!

The Enlightening Amusement Park

2011-09-18T22:27:00.000-07:00

Today my husband, children, parents and I went on our annual excursion to an area amusement park. We go every year on a certain day, and have been doing this since I was a little kid. I remember being my sons age and how exciting it was and what I liked and didn't like. (One thing I liked, and always wanted was one of these huge paper roses, about 16 inches in diameter, but my mom always refused to shell out the stupid amount of money for said tissue paper rose, which may have scarred me permanently, but that's a tale for another time!) Now I get to go and see my parents enjoy watching their grandchildren ride the rides and eat the junk food and play those ridiculously expensive games and all those amusement park things. This year, my son has grown too tall to ride some of the rides in kiddie land, which makes me somewhat sad as it makes me realize how fast time travels and days go by and kids grow and change. My daughter is the one who really made me think this year though. This year, a whole year older than last, she was much more aware of things going on around her and was able to scope out the rides and choose which ones she was interested in, which was most of them. Where my son is timid and extremely cautious, my daughter is mach 2 with her hair on fire flat out goin'. Watching her run gleefully from one ride to the next, asking "where now mommy?" was so much fun. Seeing the smile on her face, hearing her little belly laugh as she held up her hands on the roller coaster brought me such joy. She's never been on a roller coaster before, but she was so open to trying it and so unabashedly enthusiastic, that it was contagious! I looked at her, wanting to freeze the moment in time because it was so full of joy and fun. The merry-go-round, the flying swings, the helicopters and race cars- all held a new adventure, excitement and joy. It was a day that I will always remember and picture in my mind, even when my daughter is all grown up. It gives me such joy and at the same time makes me want to cry because I know there will never be another day just like this one...time travels, days go by, kids grow and change. To those who contemplate never having children, which I admit, I at one time did, this is the kind of day that you can't fully explain or put into words when you are trying to convince someone that children are the most wonderful, magical, fun thing in the world. They pain you sometimes, and try your patience pretty much daily, but nothing is worth it like the payback you get when they wrap their little arms around your neck and plant a big kiss on your lips and say "I wuv you mommy!" or when they concentrate so hard on a crayon picture and then bring it to you pronouncing that it's you. I really love when I go somewhere and upon my return after, say, just a couple of hours get a running hug and greeting like I've been gone for days.And then there's the payback you get totally unexpectedly on magical days at the amusement park...thank you God for this day.

MAGIC FOREVER, GROWN-UPS NEVER!

TOO COOL FOR SCHOOL

2011-08-27T12:03:00.000-07:00

SIMON SAYS

IT'S A CHALLENGE- CAN YOU CUT IT?

Recently I was having a discussion with a friend of mine who was unpopular with her teenage daughter because she had decided not to let her daughter go somewhere with a friend, especially once she found out that the other parent would be dropping the girls off and not staying to chaperone. The "somewhere" in question is no place for unattended teenage girls, I assure you. My friend was not relishing the coming discussion with her daughter, and the inevitable unhappiness and teen drama that would ensue. However, I know she will stick to her guns and do the right thing, whether it's popular or not. This episode exemplifies for me a pitfall that my friend refused to fall into, but that many parents seem to- one of the worst mistakes you can make as a parent- not being a parent. When you become a parent, you are responsible for the physical and emotional well-being of your child. That means doing what is best for them, whether they like it or not. When they're babies you make them eat their veggies. When they are in school you make them do their homework and take showers. When they are teens, it is up to you to keep track of them and know who they're with and what they're doing. That is parenting. You are not your child's friend, and to trying too hard to be a friend is compromising your job as a parent. When your children grow older and more independent your job gets even harder as you do your best to guide them into the right choices. Sure, it's great to maintain an open dialogue and show respect to your child for their opinions and choices, but that doesn't mean that you aren't still in the driver's seat. I see folks try to be buddies with their kids instead of parents, and the result is a child who lacks clear direction, and a healthy respect for their parents. They tend to make poor choices because they have not been given a clear set of standards and rules to live by. Kids may act like they hate rules, but the truth is they thrive on a routine, and a well established and enforced set of rules. This is not a popularity contest. It is a job, it has rules, and you are the enforcer. I had friends in high school whose parents let them have parties with drinking, let them stay out as late as they wanted and didn't ask a lot of questions about where they were, what they ate and if their homework was done. They were the "cool" parents. My parents were not at all cool. Not even close. They were always making me eat healthy, checking on my homework and insisting on meeting my friends AND their parents to make sure we were all "on the same page." Boyfriends? They were submitted to the dreaded "meet the parents" session before I was even allowed out of the house with them. What a drag! But, over time, you know what I noticed? The kids with the "cool" parents ultimately felt ignored and sad because their parents didn't seem to really care about them. They would end up pulling stupid stunts just to get attention from mom and dad. I, on the other hand, had rules and expectations and curfews. I was extremely loved...what a drag, huh?

RULES RULE!

Ritual dining

2011-07-08T21:46:00.000-07:00

Missing the Ritual

I love food. I love to cook it, watch shows about it, and especially eat it. I also realized recently that although the food is certainly important, it is the ritual that I really love. I love to watch shows like Anthony Bourdain, and Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern. They are food shows, but they are travel shows as well, so we get to live vicariously through the hosts to see exotic locations, interesting people, and sometimes odd and, frankly, not tasty foods. One thing that I have noticed is that whether the countries they visit are wealthy or poor, or the people are sophisticated or primitive, food plays an essential part of their lives, and not just because it's necessary to sustain life. It doesn't matter if it's a 4 course meal in Italy, or one fish shared in Zimbabwe- it's the rituals involved- the gathering of family and friends, the traditions passed on from generation to generation. Think about your family and what traditions you have that involve food. Birthday dinners where mom makes whatever you want. The family Christmas celebration that wouldn't be the same without Aunt Betty's cranberry salad. The summer picnic that must be held in Uncle Bob's yard and must include cousin Ann's potato salad. These are traditions and you associate certain foods with them- it just wouldn't seem right without them. But, if you stop and think further, the most important part is not what you eat, but whom you are eating with. Sure, Aunt Betty's cranberry salad is important, but it wouldn't be the same without Aunt Betty, right? The truly essential element is the gathering, the sharing of stories, being with people you care about, making memories. I personally believe that this kind of interaction is important to make a part of daily life, not just special occasions. I fear that in this world of fast food and hectic schedules, the rituals of family dining have fallen by the wayside. The thought makes me sad. Sitting down to dinner as a family, sharing your thoughts, talking about your day, laughing together- this is strengthening the fiber of the family. If you can make a tasty, healthy meal, that's all the better, but if you can't pull that off every night, or most nights, at least sit down and share the meal- even if it's not gourmet fare. Your kids may well remember Friday night pizza night as their favorite, because everyone sat down together and shared time. Chances are they won't remember a drive thru meal or a sandwich gulped down in front of the t.v. We may not all be the "Next Food Network Star," but hey- if Rachael Ray can whip up something tasty in 30 minutes, so can we! So, I say, let's revive the ritual! Clear off that dining room table, set out the dishes, and SIT DOWN AND EAT! Talk, laugh, share. Make the time, because none of us know how much time we really have to share.

BON APPETITE!

Happy 4th of July!

2011-06-28T11:05:00.000-07:00

SIMON SAYS

Do you realize how lucky you are to be an American? The freedoms and quality of life we enjoy in this nation are quite amazing, and we should be thankful every day. But, we're not. Truly, we carry on with our business each day taking so many things for granted. Like a child who thinks that everyone lives just like they do, we don't even stop to think what folks in other places live like, we just trip merrily along doing all the important, necessary and occasionally exciting things that comprise our lives.
How spoiled we are really hit me the other day at the grocery store as I was scanning the cereal aisle looking for a particular kind of cereal. Suddenly, I was quite overwhelmed by the number of choices laid out before me. I thought to myself "there are people in the world starving, and I am here trying to decide which of the gazillion types of cereal we're going to eat this week. What's wrong with this picture?!" So, I started counting, just out of curiosity, and do you know that there were approximately 63 different kinds of cereal?! Are you kidding me?! And that's not even counting generic versions. That means we can have a different kind every week for a year and still not have tried them all! No wonder I see people in the grocery store wandering the aisles looking bewildered, and frankly, in the male population, downright frightened. We should be scared! 63 choices, and that's just the cereal aisle! While there are people out there wondering where their next meal will come from, if they will have one, we're stuffing our faces with cocoa crispies. AMERICA- WE ARE SPOILED ROTTEN! I remember when I was a kid, a priest talking to us about a missionary trip that he took to Africa. He was on a bus, eating a banana. He threw the peel out the window, and watched in horrified amazement as a dog and child ran up and started fighting over the banana peel. He said that was when it really hit him how poor and hungry these people really were. We really don't understand how fortunate we are. Even our poor are much better off than a lot of folks in other countries. I was inspired to look up some information to see statistically how we compare with the rest of the world. I'm not just talking about what we would consider to be poor countries, but countries that you would probably consider "on par" with us. Now, I am by no means saying that money is everything, but you must admit, you like having more rather than less of it, don't you? Did you know that the 2011 median income in the U.S. is $46,326? Now, consider this: according to 2007 numbers, here is the median household income for some other countries:

Italy: $16,866
Japan- $19,432
United Kingdom- $25,168
France- $19,615
Spain- $18,391

Are you feeling lucky yet? Now, consider, that the 2009 poverty level guideline for a family of four in the United States was $22,050.00. Compare that to the numbers above. If you're still not feeling lucky, how's this for a statistic: the average family in Uganda brings home $320.00 a year. Yep, that's right, $320.00. You probably spend that on going to the movies. Or, if you chose, you could buy about 80 boxes of cereal with that money...but you only have 63 different kinds to choose from, so you'll have to eat the same kind a few weeks out of the year. You poor thing!

HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!
GOD BLESS AMERICA!

Welcome to Planet Nimrod

2011-06-23T15:45:00.000-07:00

Recently, I took a vacation with my husband and kids, my parents and my brother and sister-in-law. A very nice vacation, one that we take annually to the beach. My dad does not like to fly, so my parents, the kids and I drove. 600 plus miles one way. When you take a road trip like this, you get to observe a lot of humanity. I discovered that there is no vacation from stupidity. Selfishness either. It would seem that there are an awful lot of people who think they are the only ones on the planet. You know what I'm talking about. The person going 55 in the high speed lane, causing traffic to slow and forcing everyone to pass them on the right while they continue to plug along, glancing constantly in their rear view mirror as if they can't believe you are there, then looking down at their speedometer. Guess what? I don't care how fast you are going! I'm going faster, so get out of my way! I don't care if you are going 100! If I come up behind you and I'm going 110 GET OVER! Of course there's the guy who rides the left lane no matter what, never looks in any of his mirrors and is completely oblivious as to the existence of other life on earth. I'm really not sure which one is worse, but I want them both out of my way! Then, when you go to the supermarket there is the person who stops their cart in the middle of the aisle and proceeds to stare open-mouthed at all the items on the shelves. Looking overwhelmed and perplexed. Smack in the middle, so no one can pass on either side. Again, Mr. or Ms. Oblivious has no clue that there are 3 other folks in the aisle attempting to maneuver their carts around their cart. A polite "excuse me" gets you a startled jump. You mean to tell me there are other people here? How alarming! I arrived at the beach, ready for some sun and fun. Carefully picking my spot and paying for my umbrella and chairs, all is looking good. Until Mr. Rude arrives and plops down right in front of me. Excuse me, Mr. Rude, but I do not appreciate having to crane my neck, straining to see the surf around your big fat Georgia Bulldogs lawn chair. I paid to see the ocean, not your sunburned backside. Right next to me is Buffy the teenage chatterbox who proceeds to talk loudly on her cell phone for the next 45 minutes. Excuse me Buffy, but OMG! How about next time you bring your BFF WITH you so I can at least hear both sides of this most scintillating conversation! Next to Buffy, we have shiny white bikini teenager who thinks digging a huge hole big enough to fit her whole body in is a fascinating pastime. The poor beach goer who stumbled into the hole and almost broke her ankle about half an hour after you took your shiny white bikini self off to polish your toenails did not find it nearly so fascinating. Look, I'm not saying I'm perfect, and we all have days when we catch ourselves with the "I'm the only one on the planet" syndrome. All I'm saying is please strive to be at least somewhat intelligent and thoughtful while here with us on planet earth- there's a few billion of us out here with you.

WELCOME TO PLANET EARTH, NIMRODIANS!

Life before 11 a.m.

2011-06-21T13:43:00.000-07:00

One morning this past winter, my husband, who always takes our son to school, rolled over at the ungodly hour of 7:30 a.m. and said "I don't feel well. You are going to have to take Jackson to school." I stared at him, wide-eyed and uncomprehending. Then, as my brain registered his words and processed them, the world stopped spinning on its axis. This could not be happening! You see, I am NOT in any way, shape or form, a morning person. I never have been and never will be. Early for me consists of having to actually be up and present myself somewhere by noon. So, my husband's words were some of the scariest he could utter. However, like a good wife and mother, I dragged myself out of bed, slapped on some makeup so as not to scare anyone I might encounter, though I couldn't imagine who that would be at the crack of dawn, and stumbled to the car with my son in tow. As we made our way out into the cold, gray morning, I was shocked to see other cars on the road. With people in them. Going places. Seriously?! Why would anyone be out at this hour?! It suddenly made me realize why there is a Starbucks on practically every corner. These poor folks who have to be out here actually functioning at a somewhat coherent level on a regular basis are going to need all the caffeine they can get! I even saw a couple of people that I knew. You mean to tell me they do this and they have never told me?! They never asked for an award, a pat on the back, maybe even a brass band parade?? I most certainly would have given them all of the above just for their gumption and bravery in facing the world at such a frightening hour. I returned home, still stunned, to report to my husband all that I had seen. He simply laughed at me and informed me that this happens ALL THE TIME! AMAZING! So, here's to you my morning warriors! Kudos to you and keep up the good work, so I don't have to! If you need my help with anything, feel free to call me, and I will meet you somewhere at noon!

STARBUCKS FOREVER!

This multitasking is killing me! (Maybe literally!)

2011-06-20T14:06:00.000-07:00

I have something to confess. Something that probably even some of my closest friends don't know about me. Perhaps my family does, but I'm not sure they even know. I am a serial multitasker. I do laundry while I make dinner. I talk on the phone while I bake cookies. I check email while I watch my soap opera and open mail. I fold laundry while I bathe my kids. I dust furniture and Swiffer the floor at the same time. I put my makeup on at stop lights. I paint my toenails while I play cards with my son. I change a diaper and put my shirt on at the same time, while talking on the phone with my mother. I beat eggs, toast toast and make pancakes simultaneously. I read books in the bathtub. I mean, God gave us two hands for a reason, right? The other day, I was opening mail, in the bathroom, while doing my business, when I thought: "What on earth am I doing?! Have I lost my mind? Can I no longer even answer the call of nature without doing something else? This has gone too far!" I know other women are like me- women who are wives and mothers, and like it or not, multitaskers. We have to be, or we would never be able to accomplish all that we do. I notice that my husband does not seem to have the same compulsion to do multiple tasks at once. Except, perhaps, for watching television and scratching himself at the same time. To be fair, he definitely multitasks at work, and he's darn good at it. However, when he hits the threshold of our home, that comes to an immediate end. For us women, that is not an option. Whether we work outside the home or not, we are expected to go 100 miles per hour doing multiple things at once all day long. And, come to think of it, often into the night. Motor on until it all gets done. The problem with this is, it becomes so engrained in us that we don't know how to relax. We don't know how to stop multitasking. We are always thinking of new ways to accomplish more- we even check our email and catch up on our reading while we're having a "relaxing" day at the spa. (Which we squeeze in between our lunch meeting and our son's baseball practice.) We have all seen stories in the news about the rise of stress related illnesses in women. High blood pressure. Migraines. Irritable bowel syndrome. Ulcers. Diseases that for years were mostly the problem of the males of our species. I don't know about you, but this is one arena that I am not interested in equality. Stop the ride, I want to get off! I, for one, am going to start slowing down, enjoying what I'm doing without thinking about what I have to do next, and DEFINITELY not doing tasks while on the toilet! Now, I have to go, because I have laundry to fold and cookies to get out of the oven before I put the kids to bed.

GIRL POWER!