Illusion

The Curtains

2021-08-01T21:46:00.007-07:00

The curtains

They are not here anymore

Tonight, the moonlight penetrates like

Your sight did my soul, ages back.

I want her not to sleep for I am afraid to

Not being able to hear the sweetest

knock on the door tomorrow morning

Moist Eyes

2020-07-26T08:02:00.001-07:00

Today can we just not talk?

Can I look deep into your eyes

And search for something which is mine?

And if I don't find anything mine

Can I just stay there till you find me?

If you find your eyes being moist someday

Please know it's not your

It's just the clouds talking.

Happy Birthday Enazori

2018-01-30T21:37:00.005-08:00

Eight:

Like Wordsworth's butterfly, like a radiant firefly

You roam around bright and dark, down and high.

Think of the memories that you would make of Tintern Abey

Feel the beauty of the red rivers as you turn eight today.

Seven:

You smile the brightest in spite of an arduous voyage.

O’ dear! You bring us pocket full of music and courage.

The dusky thorns lead you to greener leeway,

Feel the beauty of your own hills, as you turn seven today.

Six:
Your monologues create the fondest dreams in every new city.
And youthful heart with an exuberant smile intensifies its beauty.

Worry not on your rashes O' dear, we will mend it on our way

Feel the beauty of the world as you turn six today.

Five:
You get tangled in the web of words and bring laurel
Spread smile in the clouds of Penang on sweet choral.
Face the world graciously with a hug, love and a big smile bouquet
Embrace the petrichor in the land of blue hills as you turn five today

Four:
Life throws shapeless, happy colors at you;
Among this countless happiness, you get to choose a few.
Paint a line in red, blue, yellow or even grey,
Write your own happy ending stories, as you turn four today.
Happy Birthday, Enazori!

Three:
You feel the sun and you get soaked in mist
You sing Dylan and Jude to have your own playlist.
Though you see faces around to make new friends everyday,
You will still find your mummy finger close as you turn three today.

Two:
You sing and dance on the love songs of this winter.
Still,
you refuse to abandon the lap of your mother.
You run we hug, you smile we melt, you ask we say,
Feel the beauty of the world you turn two today

One:
Play with the stars if the night seems to be long
Live your life with sand, rainbow and a country song
Carry a pocket full of sunshine we gift and we pray
Feel the beauty of the world you turn one today

I Still do not Trust the Phone Call

2017-04-20T05:45:00.002-07:00

I never trusted the phone call
A lost tempest, a heartbroken forest
And a wild colorless wave crossed betwixt the call and my realization.

A disturbed, lost and unknown tempest left a scar
To let me realize your emptiness.

A heartbroken forest un-drenched for ages
But grief stuck tall bamboo trees
Rub between them to weep and drench
The Bermuda grass, to let me sense you are not close.

A wild disturbed wave sinks
The newly carved house, yet dried are my lips
And colorless eyes to knock my heart
Which says you are not to be touched.

I still do not trust the phone call.

Drenched in Your Color

2016-09-26T04:04:00.005-07:00

It’s been few years that
I have been playing with a canvas.
Canvas of some ambiguous yet striking lines.

Painting the lines with hope,
On hope there is a tinge of some love,
On love there are some sketches of dew,
And on those dew there are shades of curiosity.

The color of the nest where the mynah lives
Is golden
And golden are her dreams.

Today, looks like there is a strong bond
Among all the lines.
Hidden is your smile, your additions and subtractions,
Your ups and down and
The captivating tune of Enazori in the lines.

Today the mynah plays with her golden drenched feathers
And she gets submerged in eternity –

I feel a lot of your color in my wings

Where have you stored your dreams Enazori?

2014-07-06T01:23:00.000-07:00

Where have you stored your dreams Enazori?

In your palms or betwixt your sharp sword edged eyebrows?

In between your strawberry fingers or beneath

Your coiled naval painting?

Where do I go around searching your trances Enazori?

Last night I kept my ears on yours,

To listen through the hollowness

And also plunged in your brown eyes -

A stream of fantasy touched every wave of my soul.

Now I want to store your dreams in an app of the iStore.

Want to create a blueprint of your dreams

And would knot it to your Ma’s Sador.

Tomorrow when it rains will play the seventh string of my guitar

And will do it every evening when it rains.

When the summer heat will soak your Ma’s Mekhla Sador,

Will make her listen to the lyrics of your whimsical dreams.

Dear Enazori, From Ma

2014-01-18T01:58:00.001-08:00

Dear Enazori

We bought a piece of land few days back

Dry and barren

The color was almost like the color of my mom's cheeks

Some vermillion mixed with a pocket full of sunshine

The waves of your tiny legs

Shiver each of my aspiration.

Now a days I have started painting:

The brush picks up many beautiful colors

To measure your length and breadth.

You must have felt a green leaf sometimes

On your legs or on your forehead.

Waiting to paint you green

The green leaf too waits with the dawn and dusk.

One day when you arrive will make you understand

How many times, even I had the shade of this green leaf.

When you come, the rain drops will make my barren land smile.

From Ma

Kingstork - Goa 6th July 2013

2013-09-13T11:55:00.004-07:00

A handful of breeze whispered
And posted me about you.
You must be now amused with your soulful dreams;
Or must have stretched your both hands,
To fondle the golden rays of early sun
From our confused and messed up balcony.
The balcony where the white and grey pigeon
Plays with her own dusky feather.
I am not doing anything like this.
Goa 6th July - why do I feel a less of everything in Goa this time –
The sand being dark like the remote clouds
Cuddled in anticipation but to burst.
Why do I feel that the waves do not intend to welcome me?
The sea has always been a witness
Of your fascination towards her
(She is yet to know your steady dislike)
Is it that the waves in Goa usually sense people
Who come with a heavy half heart?
Or maybe she is just teasing me;
So that I keep roaming around
with the same damp and heavy heart.
Tonight it’s going to be a heavy rainfall in Goa and
I plan to get drenched.
Who knows, the rain drops might bring some news
about you
like the handful of breeze.

I Plan to Steal a Guitar Tomorrow

2012-12-24T13:05:00.003-08:00

Tomorrow, I plan to steal a guitar
From a nearby musical store.
I will pet this guitar like a
Fish, a cat or a parrot.
When the strings of the guitar grow like those unruly hairs,
I will trim them off with lot of warmth.
With a comb, I will make them look tidy.

The day when my guitar gets a bad throat
Will feed him warm water
And will let him do gargle regularly.

I have also crafted a wooden bed for him
Where I have designs of human…a lot of beautiful human

I am still thinking what would he like to have for his meal?
Chicken or something vegetarian?
Some seafood or just some cola.
I somehow feel, if he gets an ice cream,
I will see a smile of a rainbow on his face.
So I am going to steal a guitar tomorrow.
Please come tomorrow to meet my new guest.

The Squirrel

2012-07-17T12:41:00.000-07:00

I see a squirrel in my balcony.
It’s been couple of days -
He comes and peeps through my window.
He is not exactly black-
Neither brown nor maroon.

He is more like the dusk -

The dusk that reminds me of your hair,

The onset of the darkness is exactly the color of the squirrel.
Its eyes has the moist color-
Though it’s very milky
I prefer calling it cloudy-
The white clear ones but
Stores a tempest beneath.
I realize we are bonded with a mutual thought.
An unknown relationship but a strong stream of consciousness.

It rained heavily yesterday and
I see a clear sky since then.
The rain has stormed in my balcony and I don’t see the squirrel today.
The rain drops touched my arms today and I feel my wings in the air.

Today, When I was Coming Back

2011-11-18T09:47:00.000-08:00

Today, when I left you and was coming back
As if all the music tumbled down the way.
The blanket of the dawn looks even moister today.

The story of the road
Where I lost my music once,
I told it to myself today.
Alas! You were not there to
Blow away the story with a smile.

What should I name this feeling of
You, not being with me -
The gloomy cloud or
The chaotic wind.
John Donne's poetry
Or Nilim da's nap.

My wheels want to break free today
Like a nomad, they wander.
Looks like the most musical poetry
Tumbles down the hill today.

The Old Wooden Bed

2011-09-10T08:30:00.000-07:00

Those were the days gone by
You used to sleep together with her.

Let father brings you the a talking toy
Or some dark chocolate .
But you use to come near
Her breast every night.

Those were the days
When your thin lips
Suck the nipple of her breast
With the eagerness of some milk.
You don’t let her sleep peacefully.
Every night you had a sensational
Touch of a women.

Today again you get lost in the sensuous scent of a women.
You love to get lost in the ups and down of her body.
You still kiss her countless
You still don’t let her sleep peacefully.

The age and time has transformed you
From the inner core of her heart
To her inner breast

What is still the same is Me
I am the witness of your desire.
I am that age long, stable
Old Wooden Bed.

Tumi Shramik Hoiu Premik

2011-06-02T10:44:00.000-07:00

Rabha jodi mur kalam hoi
tenehole mur kolome okol
Premor kobita kiyo likhe

Rabha, monot pore ne tumar xai
stationor platform, PWDr rastar
Sharamikor tambut kotuwa raati.

Priyobalak heruwai tumi ghuri phura
Xei rasta aaru stationot paamne atiya
Tumar pododhuli bisari?

Rabha tumi biplobi
Janatar ashru jodi tumar ashru hoi,
tenehole Pitri hridoy tumi kot heruwala?

Moi bhabu-
Axonkhyo janatar jodi tumi hendali,
Tumar hendali kot?

Rabha, tumak aaji paam kot?
Civilor xonmukhot tukari bai thoka
Bhikharituk tukarile
Pam ne Rabha tumak?
Ne mur Preyokhir hridoyot
Thakibo para tumi?

Tumi Bordoisila hoi porojonomot
Tumi premik hoi, pitri hoi xubhologonot
Kora puron Jonotar opurno aaxa!

FullStop

2011-02-01T08:14:00.000-08:00

I don’t feel any tears in my eyes today,
I roam around and it’s a tasteless feeling.
Today I can see the green leaves
I created, turning into white.

This time the winter is severe,
It cuts like a sharp edge through my skin.
I thought I will get you a pair of socks
Before the winter sets in
If not a woolen one, may be a thick one,
the one you liked last time.

If I would have ever knew that ,
The dampness of the winter
Will turn into a tempest ,
I would have got you the pair of socks long back.

Today I still don’t feel any dampness in my eyes
I stare at my odorless paints and I get a vibe
Will it have the fragrance again?

A Beginning

2010-11-14T08:52:00.000-08:00

Today, feels like green everywhere.
The earth looks tender
Like the gentle breeze from Laban,
And my mind feels the freshness
Of the slow moving stream from the uphill.
Today, feels like tuberose
About to blossom in all the corners of my heart.
And the smiling Eucalyptus tree is flying across
The patches of blue clouds.

Today, this life's new meadow just need
Few pocket full of raindrops…
Wish you be some rain, be some cloud and some rainbow
And shower your blessings for our new life

Today When I Drop You Home

2010-03-18T05:46:00.000-07:00

If today all the green leaves would have been green forever
If the dry earth would have been still raw even after the heart full rain,
When I peep through my motorcycle mirror
Why do I see the trees, the leaves, the clouds pass by so fast
Today why my shirt gets dried up instantly
Soon after a bucket full of rain.
The crystal clear clouds embrace me and
I slip into her ups and downs.
I feel a sweet pinch just close to my heart.
Today when I drop you home
I want the glaciers close to Sun,
Stop melting for pocket full of time

I lost My Mirror

2009-11-02T04:21:00.000-08:00

Last week I bought a mirror for my motor cycle
It looks like an attentive ear of a rabbit
A rabbit whose color is white-
White like yesterday's dawn.

Now a days I see a lot of dreams through this mirror
A herd of elephant and a big snake -
Usually with lots of shades,
patches of violet and white
Sometimes few clouds and
sometimes few Sounds of excitement.
Sometimes I also see different colors
Black, white, green and yellow
But I have never seen red

Since last two days I am not able to find my mirror.
Somebody has stolen it,
When I parked it in that usual
Corner near Java City.

Today, when I ride
I lean and try to find the mirror
Just a hope that it will come back.
And again today if those dark clouds rain
Will hold one raindrop in my palm
And will ask -Oh Raindrop! Do you see my tear drop?
Will I be able to see her face
In my mirror today again?

Next Year When it Floods...

2009-05-29T09:45:00.000-07:00

Flood transpire, Every year it does.
And when it happens, it happens very cruelly.
It washes away the drains, houses,
Green Leaves, branches, trees, bamboo seats
Underneath the huge tree.

Since last few days I have been trying to gather
Few straws, leaves, stones and some dreams
This time when it floods
I will take along all these,
And rush towards your village
With my dreams too.

Will try my best to prevent the rushing water
And when I will loose all my dreams against the flood
Then I will lie down myself in front of the water.
My heart, my chest will fight against the cruel torrent.
This time when the floods come towards your village
I will Jump myself to stop every drop of water.

This time before even sadness touches your heart
I will jump myself to stop every breeze of sadness.

Someday Try to Love Someone Like I Do

2009-03-22T13:09:00.000-07:00

Tonight the full moon shines like never before
The milky evening peeps through my window
And says “ Why awake?
Let your eyes close and you float.
The moon in your dream is far beautiful than
The moon in my lap.
She will stay always close to you
And would never go away when the dawn breaks”
I steal some light from this evening tonight
Take it in my blue bowl
And when I see a vivid reflection of mineI reply
“ I don’t dream now a days,
And I have started hating onions”
Someday, try to love someone like I do.
It hurts when dream breaks.
But I encounter truth today
Where I smile when I see you.
Come tonight in my dream again
I will embrace you like the blue sky cuddle the moon tonight

The Moon, Star and some Thoughless Cloud

2009-03-08T09:13:00.000-07:00

Today the moon must have looked
More beautiful than ever before.
So much of brightness,
That the star never saw it before in her.
And the star thought that the Moon will
Wrap herself today with the white milky dress
He always liked.
The star will stay aside today and will measure
The depth of her love
Today he is searching for a caliper
To weigh the depth of her love.
As he can see few clouds, close to her today-
Some moist cloud, few yellow cloud.
Few thoughtless clouds and few budding cloud
Seems like those yellow clouds will
Envelop his Moon with all his madness.
The star has lost his brightness today
Eyes closed and he can see only few
Dark clouds
And waits for the curtain to go down of
200 Rainy Days

My House Looks Stranger to me Today

2008-12-06T12:14:00.000-08:00

Today I don’t want to enter my house.

Why did I leave you in the midst of those planes?

Today the clouds are so excited,

They are so resolute,

They don’t even know where will they land today

Someone's paddy filed or in someone's blue dream.

On some rose petal or on your forehead.

And by any chance if they fall

Somewhere in your curly hair,

The rain drop will be in shame;

The dark clouds were not dense enough.

Don’t know why the rain embraces me, every time.

You too also like rain,

The rain which soaks every ups and down of your soul,

Let it flood you entirely this time.

If Death is also a truth,

Let me ask Death today - How can someone be so close, so close to soul?

The rain poured just few days back

The days went by like a blink of your eyes!

Today again I don’t want to enter my house.

The house looks stranger to me, lost in some cloud, dark cloud.

Last Year, Somewhere Around this Time The Sky looked so Blue

2008-11-03T10:27:00.000-08:00

Last year, somewhere around this time
The sky looked so blue.
It’s blue even today, but not as much as last year.

Today he still feels
The touch, in between his hair.
He smiles abruptly even when he is sleeping.
He remembers her red top every now and then
And some sparkling dreams woven in that red top.
And she doesn’t let him touch it,
Thinking the dreams would shatter.

Why she hugged him suddenly that day
Did she know, that he would go away one day.
She feels all the waves of him
In her breath even today, as if it was just yesterday.

She doesn’t know why the sky was so blue that day
Or why the leaves were even more green.
Last year, somewhere around this time
The sky looked so blue.

Today the sky is dark
Darker than her hair,
Looks like it will rain this year,
Dark rain!

The Sun is Lost Somewhere in an Ugly Painting

2008-09-17T09:56:00.000-07:00

The sun came out like ever before

Like dreams of mine in between the clouds

Like hide and seek when I sleep

Like bubbles of rain in winters.

I remember –

The sun looked calm and stunning in the morning.

During the noon, she was a bit annoying

But her tender touch waved a warm layer on my back.

And by evening as usual

She wanted to go.

The moist breeze helped her sleep.

She vanished in between two dark threads

Today darkness looks more dark and cruel

As if some painter has overdone his painting

I am not able to search the stars too,

Someone has hidden them in his palm.

The scarlet blood has made the sky look ugly.

The sun is lost among the dead bodies

Now its just darkness,

Someone's dark and an ugly painting

A worthless and a bloody painting.

The Raindrops Have Gone Mad Today

2008-07-29T13:02:00.000-07:00

The rain drops today look like opium in their head
They all have gone mad,
They don’t sit on rose petals today.
They don’t make bubbles and
Look so restless more.

I want to get close to you today,
So that I can smell the beetle-nut in your mouth.
I wish I had few more fingers
To roll thorough your hair.
The emptiness that touches every cell of the breeze.

Today raindrops are so impatient,
Looks like they want to embrace the clouds again.
Kiss the cloud myriad and feel the warmth.

Father, I don’t want to come far away from you again.

Me, Mrs Parimala's house and Coorg

2008-07-08T04:44:00.000-07:00

Tonight once again, suddenly I realize myself.
In Coorg, middle of a huge coffee estate
I find a lonely essence – Mrs Parimala’s house.
The extension of her house and
She let us stay there.

Come, let’s measure the extension-
It was tailored so perfectly
As if she knew, we will arrive one night.

Tonight, no operation can search for the starts in the sky,
The clouds are so protective.
My dreams are spread out in vastness and lost, but
The cigarette smoke out of the window gets drenched
In the rain tonight.
The smoke brings along the rain into my room.
I want to marry the rain tonight.
And I want to feel every curve of the rain.
She smiles at me and I mix
Some of your drops in my wine.

Tonight in Mrs Parimala’s house
I understand myself once again.