Creative Pink Designs Positive Thinking Blog

What Is Self-Sabotage, and How Can You Fix It?

2013-05-08T08:00:00.000+12:00

Self-sabotage happens when we basically get in our own way with certain negative behaviors like procrastination, overeating, excessive drinking, or doing drugs.

We generally use self-sabotage to avoid negative feelings

Even if the act of self-sabotage is negative over the long run, it has short-term positives – that is, self-sabotage can make us feel better by distracting us or by "putting off" some unpleasant feeling. Fortunately, you can address and then prevent self-sabotage.

Become aware of what you're doing

Self-sabotage can happen unconsciously. You may feel horrible after a session of self-sabotage – but only truly be aware of what you've done after the fact. The first step to overcoming this is to simply become aware of what you're doing.

Journal about it

Free writing or journaling helps you determine just why you're doing the self-sabotage. Don't judge, just write. Eventually, the reasons for the self-sabotage will be revealed.

Come up with some solutions

Come up with some alternatives to self-sabotage. For example, the next time you want to stuff bad feelings down with cupcakes, decide to write about your feelings instead.

Begin to adopt new habits – and be gentle about it

It's often been said that it takes 30 days to break a bad habit and establish a new one. Self-sabotage is a bad habit that you've gotten into, and it's not going to disappear overnight. However, learning new behaviors will squelch the self-sabotage and ultimately make you a healthier, happier person.

Barend is a social media strategist and entrepreneur with a focus on design and marketing. He has a background in technical engineering, copywriting, graphic design and website development. For more information on Barend and his services, visit: www.Creative Pink Designs.com

Pick Your Battles Carefully

2013-04-08T08:00:00.000+12:00

As you live your most positive life, you may think that you should never get mad or fight, but that's not quite true. Part of being happy, of living your best and most positive life, is to make sure that you are heard, that you stand up for yourself and set healthy boundaries so that you're not taken advantage of. However, the way you do it – and how often you do it – is important for a healthy, balanced life that's also happy and positive.

Pick your battles carefully

The most important thing to note is you should pick your battles carefully. What are the important battles?

Never let anybody talk you into doing something that compromises your integrity or your values

Listen to your gut. Whenever someone tries to talk you into doing something you know you shouldn't, your gut will be telling you that this is wrong, that you should not do this. Physical or emotional violence, greed, manipulation, or most illegal activities are clearly wrong. When someone tries to tell you to do something you clearly shouldn't, don't "fight" them, necessarily, but do absolutely stand your ground. Don't let yourself be swayed.

Let the rest go

As the saying goes, "Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?" Let other people have their opinions, listen and be open, and uphold your values. Few battles are so important that you must "win" them – not that you really can.

© Barend du Preez

Go Ahead, Be Kind. It's Good for You

2013-03-08T08:00:00.000+13:00

Did you know that it's actually beneficial to you to be kind to others? Here's how:

· People will like you

No one says you have to be a pushover, but if you always try to express kindness, love and consideration wherever you go, people will like you. And when people like you, you're going to be popular – not superficially, but in ways that really matter, in that you have a loving and supportive network of friends and family around you.

· You'll have more confidence

When you're truly kind, you're naturally more confident. That's because when you're kind, you feel good about yourself, which breeds confidence. That confidence can translate to many other positive things, including success.

· You'll feel good about yourself

When you have confidence, when you have friends that support you, and when you do good things just because you want to and not to get anything in return, you'll feel good about yourself. When you are kind to other people, it's natural and easy to feel good about yourself, too.

· That kindness will come back to you

Whether you know it or not, the kindness you give to others is passed on. Sometimes you won't know how someone passes your kindness on to others, and that's perfectly fine. But some of it will come back to you because people you've been kind to will return these riches to you when you need them. So be kind. It's good for you.

© Barend du Preez

Bring Balance to Your Life

2013-02-08T08:00:00.000+13:00

If you're like most people, you're juggling work, family, kids – taking care of everyone but yourself. However, to be truly healthy, you have to have balance to your life, and it's not as hard as you think. You can do it with these simple steps:

Make yourself a priority

You've got responsibilities – deadlines at work, kids to take care of, bills to pay – and they'll always be there. But to really bring balance to your life and be happy and fulfilled, you have to make yourself a number one priority. Put yourself on your list, at the top – before chores, before your next business deadline, before soccer practice.

Look for the spaces "in between" activities to schedule "me" time

You can take "me" time any time you've got a spare moment. Standing in line at the grocery store? Me time. Half an hour of downtime after the kids are in bed? Me time. What do you do with it?

Do nothing during your "me" time except to focus on yourself

Chances are, even when you sit still, you're still not relaxed. Your mind is racing, thinking about what you have to do "next." This time, stop. Focus quietly on your breathing, on how you feel – and see what you notice.

You probably notice that you're stressed and tense. Consciously relax. Slowly, over time, this will become habit, and as long as you keep yourself a priority, you'll make sure you have this balance every day.

© Barend du Preez

Barend is a social media strategist and entrepreneur with a focus on design and marketing. He has a background in technical engineering, copywriting, graphic design and website development. For more information on Barend and his services, visit: www.Creative Pink Designs.com

Live in the Moment for a Better Life

2013-01-08T08:00:00.000+13:00

You hear about "living in the moment," but what does that mean, really? Think about that. What would it be like to only have "now"? No past, no future, just now.

In fact, that's all we do have. We really don't have a past (just the memories of it), and there will never actually be a future – because once it arrives, it's no longer the future. It's the present. So stop anticipating a future that will never exist, and stop living in a past that no longer exists. Live in the present, in the moment – the only reality there is – for a better life. How?

· Dance like no one is watching

Dance – or do anything – like no one is watching. Stop worrying about what others think about you. (Chances are, they're lost in their own thoughts and aren't paying attention anyway.) Don't think too hard about what you're doing. Instead just enjoy the moment. Enjoy the energy coursing through your body as you run on a sunny day, bask in the joy of spending time with those you love – now.

· Breathe

Nothing pulls you back into the moment like your breath does. If you find your mind wandering toward past hurts or stuck on future worries, stop and breathe. You don't even have to consciously "clear your mind." Just breathe. Inhale slowly, then exhale just as slowly. Your mind will clear naturally, on its own, and you will be in the moment.

© Barend du Preez

Barend is a social media strategist and entrepreneur with a focus on design and marketing. He has a background in technical engineering, copywriting, graphic design and website development. For more information on Barend and his services, visit: www.Creative Pink Designs.com

Ways to bring out your inner child

2012-12-08T08:00:00.000+13:00

As busy adults, we may think that it's all about work and not about play – but we'd be wrong. In fact, you need to nurture and bring out your inner child to be healthy and happy. How?

Do something fun you did as a kid on a regular basis

Think of something you did when you were a kid and miss doing, maybe even something you think adults "shouldn't" do. Challenge that attitude. Swing on the swing set with absolute abandon just the way you did when you were six, or sit down and watch some old Looney Tunes cartoons on a Saturday morning.

Focus on something you're passionate about at least a couple of hours a week – for fun

When we grow up, we tend to take on responsibilities and forget to do things just for fun. You need to, though, to keep your creativity and your simple joy of being alive flourishing. So pick something you're passionate about but haven't had a chance to do for a while, or learn something new that you've always wanted to do, like taking art lessons. Don't go for perfection; simply enjoy what you're doing.

Fun tip: Enjoy the moment

Kids usually know how to enjoy the moment, but adults often forget how to. At least once a day, stop and appreciate. As you hurry through your day, pause and savor a soft, flowery breeze, or go outside and bask in the beautiful sunset before sleep.

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Attaining Peace of Mind, One Breath at a Time

2012-11-21T08:00:00.004+13:00

Do you want to attain peace of mind? You can. All you have to do is to breathe consciously for a few minutes a day, every day. How does it work?

· It helps you focus on your breath, not on your problems

How do you feel right now? Is your mind racing, thinking of this or that quandary?

Now, stop and take a deep breath, counting to ten on both the inhale and the exhale. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten as you breathe in, and the same as you breathe out.

What were you doing when you were breathing in and out? That's right. Not thinking of anything else. When you breathe and focus on your breath, you attain peace, if only for a moment – at first. Keep doing it, and you'll expand that peace of mind outward, until it becomes habit.

· It brings oxygen to your brain and other organs

Most of us are shallow breathers. Unfortunately, this leaves us with less than optimal oxygen levels, and that can lead to anxiety and unclear thinking. Breathe deep and clear your thoughts – and yes, attain peace.

Fun tip: Use breath to de-stress anytime. Sit down, and breathe in… And breathe out… Counting to 10 on both the inhale and the exhale as you do so. Make a point to do this at least once a day on arising, and whenever you feel stressed throughout the day.

Divali: Festival of Lights, and Celebration

2012-11-14T11:44:00.001+13:00

Divali (or Diwali, Devali, or Deepavali, depending on the region the celebration is held in) is a traditional festival in India and is the most important holiday of the year, much as the upcoming Christmas holiday is the most important of the year for many other areas of the world. It's called the "Festival of Lights" because celebrants light rows (avali) of lamps (deepa). Those lamps symbolize the inner light all humans carry with them, light that illuminates and protects us from any spiritual "blackness" or "emptiness" that threatens.

The holiday is a time for families to gather and celebrate with light – light from joyful fireworks, electric lights, bonfires and simple clay lamps. Other symbols of light and celebration, such as flowers and sweets, are also freely shared. (Again, this spirit of holiday, of joy, sharing and celebration, reflects much of what happens with Christmas and "Christmas spirit," too.)

Lakshimi, the goddess of physical and spiritual wealth and prosperity, is also worshipped; the lamps light her way as she is warmly welcomed into people's lives and homes during this special time.

Observing Divali in our own lives

Can we take lessons from Divali for our own lives, regardless of our heritage? Certainly.

· External light can be a way to illuminate us spiritually, too

There's a reason Divali is so full of light. Light symbolizes joy, celebration, gifts (both giving and receiving), sharing and fun. When we focus on this, we focus on and feed our own internal light, too. Divali is a time to feed the soul with joy and light. We can learn to do this every day, not just during a special holiday or festival.

· Prosperity is to be welcomed

Prosperity has somehow been given a bad rap by many. It's true that greed can lead to corruption and other bad things, but greed for material things or money has nothing to do with true prosperity. A prosperous attitude both draws good things to you and encourages sharing with others. There is "enough" for everyone. Health, and physical and spiritual wealth, can be enjoyed by all.

· Good is ever-present, while "evil" is simply "absence"

Good is a physical energy that you can both cultivate and draw to you. Use good for yourself, and share it with others, too. Good fills the vacuum that many call "evil." "Evil" is not a real presence, however. It is simply an emptiness that disappears once we invite good – and light, and joy, and celebration, and sharing – into our lives.

Drawing (or attracting) good into our lives

Good has its own energy, and just as Divali focuses on it and makes it grow and become a self-fulfilling prophecy, so it is with the Law of Attraction. The Law of Attraction is simply a universal law, one as infallible as the law of gravity. It simply states that what you focus on expands… and what you focus on is what you attract to you. Learn to have Divali, the Festival of Lights, in your life every day, by using the Law of Attraction to bring good things to you.

Why Is It Important to Have Good Relationships with Your Boss and Coworkers?

2012-11-07T08:00:00.000+13:00

Do you love your job? Or do you love what you do – but not the environment you work in? It may simply be a matter of developing good relationships with your boss and coworkers. Why is it important for you to do that?

You may get better work projects

If your boss likes you, finds you approachable and easy to work with, AND sees you as the go-to person who is going to get something done when it should be done, you're likely to be handed work projects you actually enjoy doing instead of the crumbs of the company, so to speak. If you actually enjoy what you're working on, you'll be happier – and who wants to spend their work hours being miserable?

You may make it easier to promote you

Generally, when someone is seen as a team player, as someone who is open and thinks it's important to get along well with others, he or she is much more likely to be up for promotion when the time comes, too. No one says you have to be a social butterfly if you're not, but do make an effort to get along with others, to be cooperative and helpful even if you're not specifically asked to be. If you're seen as someone who is a good problem solver AND you make yourself approachable enough to fill that role in a pinch, you may just be the one the boss picks for the next promotion in your department.

You might get better pay

If you make an effort to get along with your boss and coworkers, you may get better pay even for your present job. Why? Because if your boss likes you AND sees you as someone who gets the job done, is always helpful, willing to go the extra mile for the company, and so forth, you're much more likely to get a raise when the time comes.

If you'd like to ask for a raise, you're much more likely to get it if your boss sees you as someone who actually deserves it. How do you do that? Right; you become a team player who is approachable, someone who's a good problem solver and works well with others to get the job done.

You might just be happier

If you love what you do but are miserable at your job – and if it's at least partly your fault because you don't make an effort to get along with your boss and coworkers – you can fix it. Again, no one says you have to become the office social butterfly or comedian, but do make an effort to at least be friendly and approachable, and to get along with those you work with, including your boss.

Give it a try

It's not always easy to establish good relationships with people, especially those you work with. But if you make an effort to do so and you're honest and sincere at the same time, you'll see how rewarding it can be.

Your thoughts

Have you ever felt like the "odd man/woman out" at work? How did you resolve the situation? What are your thoughts on the subject? I'd love to hear from you!

© Barend du Preez

You Are My Sunrise

2012-10-31T08:00:00.002+13:00

This morning I saw the birth of a sunrise like I have never seen before
The orange haze on the clouds giving away what was to come
The tip of this fiery body slowly emerging from beneath the horizon
A powerful event that marked the beginning for some and the end for others

In the midst of all of this my mind kept wandering to you
Damn, one more moment that I wish I could share with you
One more moment that I want you to feel, to have, to live with me
Far too soon it becomes too intense; I close my eyes but I can still see

My heart felt like it was on fire, just like my eyes
I felt all the love I have felt in a lifetime at this single point in time
It was as if I was overdosing on something, overdosing on love
I swallowed, desperately trying to clear my throat

I can see the glow around you, the fiery person that you are
So quietly beautify, but so intense when you want to be
So warm to my heart, so hot to my touch, so life-giving to my soul
You are my sunrise - by Gerard C Johnson

To Manage Time Or Not To Manage Time - That Is The Question.

2012-10-24T08:00:00.003+13:00

We all know we must do it, we all know it will help us, but how many of us really do it?

I’m talking Time Management people. REAL Time Management.

I found myself with a load of work the other day – the kind that leaves your table screaming for air and its legs begging for mercy. My day was looking extremely short – 24 hours would just not be enough.

But instead of actually doing the work, I researched Time Management. And I found THAT word – the word no one wants to say because it sounds like something only your doctor would say in private. Procrastination. Who would invent a word like that!

Anyways… After spending hours on the internet reading about THAT WORD, Time Management and a few delicious chocolate cake recipes, I found a system that made sense to me:

You take a piece of paper and you draw your day into segments:

Each of these lines represent 5 minutes and each segment then, 25 minutes. Take one task and divide it into such a document. You work for 25 minutes, then you take a break:

During that break, you reward yourself with a coffee or something small. At the end of the day or task, you reward yourself with something bigger – a DVD or pizza!

The secret to this system is this: during the 25minutes you WORK – you close your emails, your Facebook, Skype, WatsApp, etc. You work for 25minutes without stopping. Before you know it – you have a break!

At the end of the day you can see how many hours you have worked and you will feel the award, you will feel proud of yourself for achieving what you have! And then you can bake that chocolate cake recipe you found on the internet!

So my fellow procrastinators, let us start to manage our time!

For your first break, enjoy this video. Relax, breathe and energize for your next 25 minutes. I took this video at Breaker Bay on the 17th of October 2012 and it inspired me to write this article.

Spare Some Change?

2012-10-17T08:00:00.000+13:00

A beggar had been sitting by the side of a road for over thirty years.

One day a stranger walked by.

"Spare some change?" mumbled the beggar, mechanically holding out his old baseball cap.

"I have nothing to give you," said the stranger. Then he asked:

"What's that you are sitting on?"

"Nothing," replied the beggar.

"Just an old box. I have been sitting on it for as long as I can remember."

"Ever looked inside?" asked the stranger.

"No," said the beggar. "What's the point? There's nothing in there."

"Have a look inside," insisted the stranger.

The beggar managed to pry open the lid. With astonishment, disbelief, and elation, he saw that the box was filled with gold.

I am that stranger who has nothing to give you and who is telling you to look inside. Not inside any box, as in the parable, but somewhere even closer: inside yourself.

"But I am not a beggar," I can hear you say.

Those who have not found their true wealth, which is the radiant joy of Being and the deep, unshakable peace that comes with it, are beggars, even if they have great material wealth.

They are looking outside for scraps of pleasure or fulfillment, for validation, security, or love, while they have a treasure within that not only includes all those things but is infinitely greater than anything the world can offer.

- by Eckhart Tolle

You are "what you think" you are!

2012-10-10T08:00:00.001+13:00

I believe that you become, similar to the people, you hang out with. The people you associate with and share ideas with, have a major influence on how you choose to act upon or not act upon your dreams.

Have you ever been around a positively charged person who electrifies everyone around you? Confidence is contagious and so is the lack of confidence.

Everything you allow into your mind, be it positive or negative, will affect your actions therefore, always surround yourself with positive "can do" people.

So, from this point on, once you associate with positive people you'll begin your journey towards peace and fulfillment. Every positive action you take towards your goals will reinforce your capability to accomplish your dreams.

Never lose sight of your dreams; it's completely up to you to remind yourself of the rewards you will reap as you achieve your goals.

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Explore the world around you.

2012-10-03T08:00:00.002+13:00

Distract yourself from your negative feelings by embracing your sense of adventure. Check out a part of town you have never been to, take a day trip to a local museum.

Days, weeks, months, and even years pass us by. And so do our dreams. Put your fears aside and get started. Do something. Do anything. Otherwise, today is gone. Once tomorrow comes, today is lost forever.

Things to DO for Little or No Money!

Enjoy a concert in the park.
Go camping.
Go for a hike in the woods.
Go for a swim.
Go fishing.
Have a picnic.
Take the kids to the park.
Work on an arts and craft projects.
Visit the library.
Do some birdwatching.
Visit the zoo.
Read.
Visit a flea market.

Today is the most precious asset you own--and is the one thing you should truly fear wasting.

Take a break from the news.

2012-09-26T08:00:00.002+12:00

The news is often filled with all kinds of depressing information. If you're already in a bad mood take a night off from the news and do something that you find enjoyable instead.

Because the news always reports what is going wrong in the world and completely ignores what is going right in the world it can make you grumpy and angry. The news essentially gives you a jolt of negative energy that can ruin your day.

Whether you believe in the universal law of attraction or not, getting a jolt of negative energy every day or every week is going to severely impact your quality of life. It is going to make you see things in a negative way and it can even start to attract negativity and misfortune into your life.

Who needs that? There are plenty of things going right in this world that I’d prefer not to focus on the few things that are going wrong.

I generally try to avoid watching too much news myself. It gets in the way of me living my life.

Read an inspiring book.

2012-09-19T08:00:00.003+12:00

Read an inspiring book.

If you're having trouble finding something inspiring about your life right now try getting inspired by the life of someone else by reading a book meant to inspire and uplift.

Your Inspiration For Today!

Make a list of all the people you hang around. Next to each name put a plus sign by the names that have a positive effect on you a minus sign by the ones that have a negative effect on you. Sometimes, it's the ones closest to us that hold us back. You must find ways to remove all of the negative relationships from your life.

Inner Child

2012-09-12T08:00:00.001+12:00

Inner Child

There's nothing to lift your mood and change your thinking like taking some time to embrace playfulness and your inner child.

Say thank you.

2012-09-05T08:00:00.001+12:00

Say thank you.

Most of us have a lot to feel grateful for that we simply take for granted.

Thank those in your life that make it better and happier to get a transitivity boost for yourself as well.

Avoid negative coworkers.

2012-08-29T08:00:00.001+12:00

Avoid Negative People.

Nothing can ruin a positive attitude like people who bring out the negatives in everything.

Avoid talking to those you know will only make you feel worse.

Focus on Positive People!!!

Stop being your own worst critic.

2012-08-22T08:00:00.001+12:00

Stop being your own worst critic.

There's no one else who knows just how to make you feel terrible like you can.

Lay off on the harsh criticism and think good things about yourself when you feel you're at your worst.

Be playful.

2012-08-15T08:00:00.001+12:00

Be playful.

There's nothing to lift your mood and change your thinking like taking some time to embrace playfulness and your inner child.

See it from another point of view.

2012-08-08T08:00:00.001+12:00

Change your pattern of thought by trying to see things from another point of view, whether it's your coworkers, your bosses or just someone impartial.

It can help you see where you went wrong and understand why others might be upset.

Boost Your Self-Worth

2012-07-25T08:00:00.001+12:00

Your beliefs have everything to do with the things you experience on a daily basis.

If you don't believe you deserve abundance, you will continually push it away!

Start improving your self-worth and affirm constantly that you deserve to be happy, healthy and wealthy.

When someone tries to give you a gift or compliment, accept it with gratitude!

The more you do this, the more you will open yourself to the blessings the universe wants to send your way too.

Tina Turner

2012-07-18T08:00:00.003+12:00

Tina Turner (born Anna Mae Bullock; November 26, 1939)

Tina is an American singer and actress whose career has spanned more than 50 years. She has won numerous awards and her achievements in the rock music genre have earned her the title The Queen of Rock 'n' Roll. One of the world's most popular entertainers, Turner has been called the most successful female rock artist and was named "one of the greatest singers of all time" by Rolling Stone.

Tina's Quotes:

But I believe we have a higher level of mentality within us, but we have to use the power in the right way.
For me the goddess is the female of God, She is powerful if different.

Love, Love, Love

2012-07-11T08:00:00.001+12:00

Love is one of the most powerful, transformational forces.

It can heal the most painful situations, transform lack into abundance, and inspire positive change in both the giver and receiver.

Practice flowing feelings of deep love for everyone and everything in your life. Love your blessings, your friends and family, the difficult people you encounter each day, and even your illnesses and obstacles.

When you love them, you heal and transform them into genuine blessings.