We Gotta Have Faith

We've Moved!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 24 Nov 2011 08:33:00 +0000

Hi! We've moved to whereswuby.com. Please come see us!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Good Morning Texas

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 02:41:00 +0000

If there was ever anything you wanted to know about these dogs, or how they work, ask away and I'll try to answer the best I can; or if you are just as amazed as me at how God created these animals, I hope you'll enjoy reading about the incredible experiences we've had so far with our Ruby.

In the meantime, you can follow Faith and Wuby on Facebook by clicking Here.

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Faith, Ruby and I had the opportunity to be on Good Morning Texas this morning. Faith was in rare form and refused to look at the camera. For most of the interview she was turned around backwards. Little stinker. When they tried to mic her up she told them "no" and that they couldn't take her picture. She's SO over this superstar stuff. ;)

After our GMT interview, we drove to a Lions Club meeting where I'd been asked to share our story by a mom whose daughter heard our story when I spoke at a school a few weeks ago. When she introduced me, she shared that her daughter was changed after hearing our story and that she couldn't stop talking about it. That totally had me crying, and was so sweet and encouraging to hear. (I always wonder if the kids ever give our story another thought.) After the meeting I had more than one person come up and thank us for sharing, a man tearfully shared that his grandson was diagnosed at age 5 and was a senior in college and doing well, and a sweet lady walked up, thanked me for coming, and said that she thought the whole thing was very enlightening for those that knew nothing about diabetes before today.

I'm gonna call that a good start to National Diabetes Awareness Month.

There are some great campaigns this month to raise awareness about Type 1 Diabetes, but I fear that the only one that knows about them are those of us living with type 1 diabetes. Get out there and live out loud. People care about our stories. Share them. I believe that's going to be the best way to truly make people more aware about what's it's like to live with this disease, and why it's so important to seek a cure.

Love y'all.

Can I Just Share My Heart for a Minute?

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 05:32:00 +0000

If you know me in real life, you've probably noticed my reflect-o-legs. Some might refer to it as being fair-skinned, but I think "reflect-o-legs" more accurately describes what I've got going on here. Try as I may for that summer glow (and truthfully I don't even try anymore), burn and peel is all I know.

I've always been one to sunburn easily, but one particular sunburn stands out to me as being one of the worst. I was pregnant. Chuck and I decided to take his boat to the lake for a few minutes so he and my brother could work out some kinks in the motor. A few minutes turned into a few hours and I left there with a terribly painful sunburn across my back and down my legs.

What is it about having a sunburn, even when it's hidden by your shirt, that makes people suddenly want to hug you tightly or pat you on the back? And it's that one spot that's the worst - that sore spot that somehow got just a bit more sun - that they seem to somehow zero in on. Maybe you don't really get more hugs or pats, you just notice it more because it hurts so badly, but it sure seems like the sunburn is a beacon calling out for attention. Ouch.

This week I feel like I'm one big sunburn.

As most of you know, Faith and Ruby were featured on the news in Dallas this week. That story got picked up by many other news station, and we're finding out, was seen all over the world. I've gotten messages from people in several different states, France, and even Australia this week.

It seems God is using this amazing dog and my precious little girl in a big way.

It's awesome that we've had so many opportunities to share this amazing story of God's provision, and raise awareness about type 1 diabetes and service dogs. We really do feel honored.

But, every time I share our story on here or facebook, and every time we make the news, we open ourselves - me specifically - up to criticism.

When you agree to a news interview you are at the mercy of the reporter. You can pour your heart out and share for hours, but ultimately that has to be whittled down to a few minutes long piece to run on the air. You just have to hope and pray that the reporter really listened and conveys that message accurately. We've experienced both sides of the coin; reporters that seemed to not have heard a word we said, and those that really retold our story well. The thing is, you never really know which way it will go until you watch it on TV along with everyone else. That can be a ~~little~~ ~~lot~~ incredibly unnerving.

It's easy for people to pick apart our stories, pass judgment and come up with (and voice) all the many ways they'd do things ~~better~~ differently. Not much is more important to me than how I do as a wife and mom - and a big part of that is how well I take care of Faith and manage her diabetes. I'll be the first to tell you that I come up short in all areas a lot more often than I'd like. But, I try my absolute best to manage Faith's health well; yet, there are still many days that I feel like type 1 diabetes totally kicked my butt. I second guess myself constantly.

That's my sore spot. And every time someone questions my care of Faith, whether knowingly or not, they are slapping my sunburn.

And, OUCH, it hurts. Every time it happens I feel like deleting my blog and my facebook accounts and sticking my head in the sand, but I truly believe that God has called me to share this journey. Still, that doesn't change the fact that sometimes it's hard to be this transparent.

There's talk about some pretty big opportunities that may open up for us to share our story. It's unbelievable and exciting to watch this as it unfolds, but there's part of me that hesitates. Do I want to open myself up to that - be that vulnerable? I know that ultimately I will, and I'll brace for whatever bad comes with the good. I know that I shouldn't really pay attention to the negative comments, but that's a lot easier said than done.

I tell you all that because one, Chuck's probably sick of hearing it and the kids are asleep, but two, to ask you to pray for us. Pray that God will give us strength for what lies ahead and comfort us when it hurts. That He'll continue to make himself known to us; and that we'll be sensitive to His leading and walk through whatever doors he opens.

Love y'all.

Faith and Ruby Make The News! (Again)

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 27 Oct 2011 06:29:00 +0000

In the meantime, you can follow Faith and Wuby on Facebook by clicking Here.

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This past week, Faith, Ruby and I had the pleasure of being interviewed by Shelly Slater of WFAA Channel 8 News. The interviewed us as part of an effort to raise awareness about Diabetes Friendly's K9s for Kids event. We were honored to be a part of this, as DFF was one of the groups that helped pay for Ruby.

Here's the news story:

There are a few little details that they didn't get quite right, (such as Faith is two and not three, and Faith does not get her bg checked 30 times a day, but Ruby does often alert 30 times a day - as she will alert every 15 mins or so until Faith's bg comes back into range), but for the most part I thought they did a pretty good job with the story. What do you think?

Exhale...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Tue, 04 Oct 2011 04:13:00 +0000

A good God does everything He does for good reason. - Gregg Harris

I've been holding on to this truth this week.

I have gone back and forth about whether or not to share all this on here, but so many of you have emailed or texted with concern. I've been too sad to respond, but writing is therapeutic for me, so I decided I'll write it all out and share it with those of you that have been checking on us this week. It's going to be ridiculously long and probably whiney, you've been warned.

About 7 weeks ago, Chuck and I found out we were pregnant. We were absolutely NOT trying, and we were in shock - and I was completely overwhelmed at the thought of getting even less sleep. But, we love our big family, so we quickly became very excited about having another precious, funny Wilson kiddo running around this house. And, if we believe what God says about children - and if we believe God when he says that he won't give us more than we can handle with His strength - then we could see this as nothing but an incredible blessing.

I know some of you are thinking WHAT?!? Doesn't she have a full plate already?

Yes, and our hearts are full too.

I know that to some of you four kids seems like a lot. To be honest, I'm no more overwhelmed with 4 than I was with 1 or 2. I know this sounds crazy, but in many ways it gets easier with more children.

I'm so ashamed to say that the one thing that tempered my excitement was the thought of telling others of this blessing and listening to all the negative OMGosh, another baby?? Don't you know what causes that?? comments. Never again.

Ok, fast forward a bit to two weeks ago.

Chuck is walking through the kitchen one evening and he mentions nonchalantly that he'd been having to run to the bathroom alot the past few days. Immediately, I thought of diabetes.

I had him check his blood sugar.

An ugly 354 looked back at us.

No way.

We re-checked.

We grabbed a different meter.

The ugly number wouldn't go away.

I checked his ketones and thankfully they were negative, so I waited until the next morning and got him in with the first dr that would see him.

Later that day, while I was educating 300+ high school students about diabetes and service dogs, Chuck was at the dr being diagnosed with diabetes.

And, they suspected it could be type 1.

I emailed Dr Casas for a recommendation for an Endo that was knowledgeable about adult onset Type 1. In true Dr C fashion, and keeping with the Godsend that he's been for us, he called me on my cell. He scolded me for not calling him first (he's Faith's pedi Endo...I didn't want to waste his time. I felt like it would be like calling your mechanic and telling him you had a flat on your bike or something - not his problem.) I was wrong. He's been SO helpful - ordering tests that should have been run by the first dr, following up on Chuck's condition and numbers, even starting him on insulin to get him some relief while we wait to find out the results of the antibody tests (to determine which type he has). Once again, we are so very thankful to have Dr Casas in our lives. For the record, the other dr hasn't checked on Chuck's numbers even once. Ugh.

While type 2 seems like it would be the lesser of the evils at this point, Chuck is almost hoping it's type 1 because Faith is so excited that her "daddy hab da betes wike me!" How will we explain to her that daddy gets "cured" (through diet and exercise if it's type 2) while she still has to live with diabetes...and insulin...and needles?

This was on Wednesday. On Friday, Chuck started insulin, I had two tests to take at school, a Spanish class to attend...AND had a kidney stone starting to move. Can I tell you? I've had four babies and I've never experienced worse pain than kidney stones. It's excruciating when it's at it's worst. I needed to go to school...and I needed to go to the ER to get some relief from the kidney stone pain.

But, I couldn't leave not knowing how the insulin would affect Chuck. Did we have his dosage right? I was terrified and decided to stay home.

Saturday Chuck and I had the rare (and MUCH anticipated - literally for weeks) privilege of having a sitter for Faith. We were both so miserable, but determined to enjoy a little time alone. We dropped the big kids off with my mom, dropped Faith off with an amazing couple we met at Tyler Type One and have grown to love, and headed to have dinner.

But we were both so miserable. We went out to eat, picked up Faith, and then headed home.

By the time we got there I was only peeing blood. (TMI? Sorry...)

I couldn't stand it any more and headed to the ER. The horribly arrogant ER dr kept me overnight on morphine and sent me home with 3 Rx's and instructions to return if I got worse.

I was back within hours unable to pass anything but drops of blood. I ended up in there all day with them pumping me full of fluids, antibiotics, and painkillers (Thank you!). Because I was pregnant they couldn't do a CT Scan, so the (much better than the day before) ER dr did an ultrasound to check my kidneys and decided to check the baby while we were at it.

He came back in the room and asked me how far along in my pregnancy I was. When I told him he responded by telling me that I needed to follow up the following day with my OB/Gyn. I told him he couldn't say something like that without elaborating, so he told me that he just didn't see what he expected to see on my ultrasound.

Of course, the next morning I was on the phone with my dr. She had me come in right away, reassuring me the whole time that everything was probably fine.

It wasn't.

Chuck and I were heartbroken to learn that there was no heartbeat. Our baby had stopped developing.

The dr offered to do a D&C, but Chuck and I couldn't go for it yet. If God wanted to work a miracle we weren't going to limit him by doing what seemed "easier" and if I was going to miscarry then taking a week to pray about it wasn't going to change anything. We agreed to pray about it for a week and reassess.

All the while I'm still miserable with pain from the kidney stones - and my poor husband is miserable with crazy high blood sugars and adjusting to the insulin and meds - and he's having to take care of me and the kids. God love him.

The next morning I called the urologist about my symptoms and was told to go back to the ER. I ended up spending the entire day in the hospital again. Because we had learned that there was no heartbeat, the (best of all three) ER dr did a CT Scan to check the stones and found a mass on my left ovary.

Oh my goodness. I know these things happen all the time, but everything happening at once just had us so beat down.

But, God is good and blessed us with some of the best friends. When they learned of what we were going through they called, emailed, brought food. We are so grateful.

We went back to the OB dr today and were told that I was hemorrhaging around the baby, and I spiked a fever yesterday, and it just makes more sense to go through with the D&C. I go into the hospital tomorrow and should get to come home right after.

This has been a rough 10 days. We know things could be worse, and we know things will get better, but right now we are overwhelmed and so, so very sad.

Thank you so much for your love and prayers. We appreciate it more than you know.

Faith does not eliminate questions. But faith knows where to take them. ~Elisabeth Elliot

Still gets to me...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 22 Sep 2011 04:47:00 +0000

In the meantime, you can follow Faith and Wuby on Facebook by clicking Here.

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Today I spoke at a local high school to a group of about 300 student council members from all over the area. I loved being able to educate about type 1 and share Faith and Ruby's story. I've told these stories so many times that I can usually get through them without getting too emotional. There's one story that still gets to me every time, though...

It was early one morning, we were all still in bed - and would be for a few more hours. I had just checked Faith and she was a little on the high side, but good.

A short while later, Ruby jumps in my bed to alert. I remember thinking, UGH, Ruby just let me sleep!, but realized that she seemed VERY agitated. Much more so than a normal alert. The next second I hear JC screaming for me to come. I was in the middle of repainting the boys room so I had all four kids bunked in the girls room.

At this time, Faith was on the Animas Ping insulin pump. If you're not familiar with how these work, it has an insulin cartridge inside of it that is similar to a syringe. A piston inside the pump depresses the syringe to administer the insulin. That cartridge is held in place by a screw cap.

A screw cap is NO match for a very meddlesome two year old.

We could lock the buttons so that Faith could not program the pump to give her extra insulin - but we never dreamed she'd disassemble the darn thing!

I ran to JC to find him standing there holding the CARTRIDGE from Faith's pump! When Ruby had left the room to come wake me, it woke JC. He looked up and realized that Faith had pulled her insulin cartridge OUT of her pump and was squeezing it - pushing a VERY lethal amount of insulin into her body!

I snatched Faith up out of her crib and checked her blood sugar. She was still at a good number. I couldn't tell how much insulin Faith had given herself, so I put the cartridge back in and reloaded it to find that she'd squeezed at least TWO units into her little body. Two units was enough to kill her several times.

Ruby was still acting very bothered. Now knowing that Faith had shot herself with insulin, I began to push juice down her. I checked her again - and even though only a few minutes had passed, Faith was getting VERY low. I couldn't get sugar in her quickly enough. I was having to give her such a large amount in such a short period of time and it seemed that it was about to come right back up.

I had no choice.

I grabbed the glucagon and gave it to her in small doses.

A few minutes later her blood sugar stopped plummeting.

Eventually, her blood sugar started to come back up.

Tragedy prevented thanks to Ruby and JC. If Faith had finished squeezing that cartridge there would have been NOTHING I could do to counteract that much insulin.

If Ruby hadn't woken us...

It's terrifying to think of this scenario without Ruby, and this is the one story that I still can not tell without getting choked up. Praise the Lord for sending us this miracle of a dog!

Thank God for Ruby

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 03:39:00 +0000

In the meantime, you can follow Faith and Wuby on Facebook by clicking Here.

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It's been a CRAZY week around here. We've all been sick, Faith almost ended up in the hospital, Eli bit THROUGH his bottom lip...Yeah... So, I'm cheating and reposting a Ruby story from November of last year. Thank God for Ruby.

So, Sunday while we were at Green Acres, Ruby kept alerting that Faith was high. She was staying in or around the 300's. It was another one of those stubborn highs that just won't come down. Despite multiple corrections (over several hours), her blood sugar was still 335 when we left Tyler.

I had a couple of stops to make, so it took us a little over an hour to get home. When we got home, Faith was asleep, so I walked around to let Ruby out. I was going to let her out and unload the car before waking Faith to get her out. As soon as I got around to Ruby's door, she jumped out and immediately jumped for the bringsel. (She currently doesn't alert in the car. She gets very anxious. We are trying to help her work through that.) I could tell by the intensity of her alert that I needed to check immediately, so I checked Faith's blood sugar while she was still in her carseat. Her blood sugar had dropped from 335 to 67 in barely over an hour! I immediately grabbed a juice box and she drank it down quickly. Her symptoms seemed to be worsening, though, rather than improving, so I yanked her out of her carseat and ran inside. I opened another juice box and by this time she was shaking SO hard. It was so scary. I sat down on the couch and put her in my lap. She started screaming, "I want my mommy! I want my mommy!" over and over again. She was SO confused and disoriented and shaking so hard. I couldn't get her to understand or realize that I was her mommy and she was in my lap!

I put the juice box straw into her mouth and she wouldn't drink it. I rechecked her bg and she was still dropping. She was now down to 53. I could tell by her worsening symptoms that we were rushing headlong into dangerous territory. I squeezed another juice box into her mouth. All the while she is still screaming for her mommy. I sat there holding her, trying to get her to understand that I was right there. She would scream for a few minutes and then get quiet and get this far off look in her eyes and then go right back to screaming for her mommy. A few minutes later her intense shaking started to ease up a bit and a few minutes after that I could get her to look at me. She seemed to be coming around.

As Faith's blood sugar started to come up her shaking began to subside, but still various parts of her body would jump and jerk. Her head would jerk backwards... her shoulder...her foot... her arm.... her leg - it was so hard to watch.

I sat there holding her, fighting back tears, and thanking God for Ruby. Had she not alerted as soon as we got home this would have been even worse.

A few minutes later Chuck and the big kids came home. We had planned to carve pumpkins, pop popcorn, eat candy, and watch movies that night. Managing diabetes is a daily battle and this disease never sleeps, but life must go on.

I know this, but all I wanted to do was lay in bed and cry. Between the man sharing that morning that his Type One loved one had died and fighting a low for MY Type One loved one's life, I was drained.

Oh, how I pray for a cure...

How far away?

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 25 Aug 2011 02:53:00 +0000

In the meantime, you can follow Faith and Wuby on Facebook by clicking Here.

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One of the questions I'm asked most often is, "How close does Ruby have to be to Faith in order to pick up on her blood sugar changes?"

After spending the year with Ruby and seeing many "long-distance" alerts, I've decided the best answer to that question is: just close enough for God to whisper in Ruby's ear that Faith needs my attention.

One of the most surprising things to me after we got Ruby, was just how well she could detect changes in Faith's blood sugar when she was not even in the same room. One of the unsung (and unexpected) benefits of Ruby is that she allows me to let Faith run & play without worrying that she's going to fall out from a low. Faith has no symptoms with her lows most of the time. She can be running around the room with a blood sugar in the 30's with no symptoms at all. For that reason, I never let her out of my sight before Ruby. Now that we have Ruby I have been able to let Faith enjoy simple pleasures that we used to take for granted. Things like children's church, playing with her siblings in the yard, or playing with the other children at support group. Even when Ruby doesn't have to alert for a high or low, the shear comfort and peace of mind she gives me (and Faith, but more on that another time) is invaluable to me.

The first time I saw for myself that Ruby could (and would) alert long distance I was blown away. I was babysitting for a friend with 3 children, so Ruby and I had spent the day in our cozy little house with 7 boisterous rowdy kiddos. We both needed a breather. So, when Chuck came home I asked him to take the kids outside to play while I cleaned up the kitchen. I checked Faith's number and it was in the upper hundreds, so I thought it safe to send her out with the rest of them under the supervision of her daddy. (She was barely 19 months old at the time.)

I kept Ruby inside with me to let her rest. I went to the kitchen to start the dishes. About 20 minutes later Ruby got up to alert. I chuckled and told her to take a load off and relax. I took the bringsel from her and put her back on her cot.

I went back to the dishes and a few minutes later Ruby got up to alert again. I thought to myself that maybe Faith had snuck inside without me realizing it, so Ruby and I looked all around the house for her. When I realized that Faith was still outside playing I put Ruby back on her place.

A very few minutes later Ruby got up to alert again. One of the great things about Ruby is that she won't stop alerting until I fix whatever is wrong with Faith's blood sugar. (This is also one of the most frustrating things when Faith is high, but more on that in another post.) I knew I was going to have to take Ruby to Faith and check her before Ruby would calm down.

I walked outside and asked Chuck where Faith was. He pointed out into the pasture, at least 30 yards away, where all the kids were playing happily. I told him about Ruby alerting and that we needed to check Faith "to convince Ruby that Faith was fine".

We went to Faith and checked her blood sugar to discover that she was 100 and dropping fast! She was low by the time we got her back to the house! And not a low symptom in sight!

We couldn't believe it! How had Ruby done that? Faith was a LONG way from our house and Ruby and I were inside the house with all the windows closed and the a/c on! Chuck and I were amazed and SO thankful!

I'd like to say that was the last time I doubted Ruby, but I'm a slow learner. Someday I'll tell you about the time I doubted Ruby during a nighttime alert, only to find Faith in the beginning stages of a hypo seizure less than an hour later.

"Momma, can you donate your pancreas to someone?"

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 05:21:00 +0000

Tonight Faith got up out of bed and said her pod was hurting her arm. A quick inspection revealed that it was bleeding. Because it wasn't yet time to change her pod, the adhesive was still really stuck well. Even though I was using Uni-Solve to help loosen the adhesive, Faith was still screaming out in pain. So loudly that it woke JC.

He came in the room and hugged and held Faith while I worked hard to remove the old pod as painlessly as possible.

She'd scream, he'd hug tighter.

She'd cry, he'd kiss her and try to redirect her attention.

JC is a sweet old soul, and he's always had a soft spot for his little "Faifers".

I got the new pod ready to be inserted. Faith got very upset, so JC picked her up and held her. He smoothed her hair and talked to her, trying to calm her down. He helped her choose her stickers to decorate her pod. What a sweet brother he is.

When the pod clicked and the needled inserted the canulla under her skin, Faith jumped and screamed the most painfully heart-wrenching scream. I looked up and there were tears running down JC's face. We both quickly began to comfort Faith and assure her it was over.

Faith calmed down, I cleaned up our mess, and JC carried Faith to bed and tucked her in.

I was sitting in my chair working on some homework when JC walked into the room crying.

The words he said sliced through my concentration.

"Momma, can you donate your pancreas to someone?"

"Why do you ask, JC?"

"Because, I want to give Faith my pancreas, Mom. I hate watching her go through this. It hurts me when she hurts, Momma! If you can donate your pancreas then she can have mine."

By now I'm crying as hard as he is.

"Sweet baby, no, you can't donate your pancreas. But, you are the sweetest brother to even be willing to do that, JC. I know it's hard to watch Faith endure all of this, it hurts me too baby. We have to remember that God loves Faith even more than we do. He sees what she goes through and it hurts him too. But, we believe that God works everything for good, and that includes this. We just have to have faith and keep praying for a cure."

"Will you pray with me RIGHT NOW, Momma? We need a cure."

Yes, my sweet JC we sure do.

The First Save

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 04:43:00 +0000

In the meantime, you can follow Faith and Wuby on Facebook by clicking Here.

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We traveled to Wildrose on a Sunday afternoon. We wanted to get there, get settled, and then we would meet Ruby the next morning. Wildrose had been more than generous, letting us spend the week in their gorgeous cabin on-site. Chuck and I felt like we were on vacation! The view was incredible.

We LOVED being able to sit on the porch and drink coffee. It was so quiet and peaceful. We sat in those chairs and waited anxiously for Ruby to arrive.

Faith LOVED playing in those pebbles in the walkway. We had a hard time keeping her from throwing them everywhere.

She was so little. How did I not notice how little she was at the time? I think it's by the grace of God, because if you let yourself dwell on how absurd a situation is (like needing a service animal for your 18 month old diabetic baby) then you'll lose your mind. We were just in the middle of the storm doing what we had to do. But, now when I look back it almost takes my breath away to see how little she was at diagnosis...and when she got her service dog, Ruby.

Here's she's waving to Ruby and the trainer who are walking up.

This was the first time we saw Ruby. I was so nervous I couldn't stand it.

These next pictures were snapped the moment Faith and Ruby met. :')

We spent that first day just going over basic service dog handling, and practicing some public access. Going out in public with a dog at your side is harder than you think.

Faith loved Ruby from day one. In this pic she's holding the "weash" getting ready to go bye-bye for lunch.

The whole first day Faith's blood sugar was unusually steady. Ruby didn't get an opportunity to alert for a high or low at all while the trainer was with us. So, I still didn't KNOW what an alert looked like. I'd heard it described of course, and had learned how to respond when Ruby alerted, but I hadn't experienced it for myself. After a very active and exciting day, it was decided that Ruby would spend the night with us in the cabin, so we could get to know each other without the pressure of the trainer watching.

That evening I was getting Faith ready for bed, and Ruby was napping peacefully on her cot.

The next moment, I noticed Ruby stand up.

Chuck and I both froze immediately and waited for what would happen next.

Ruby calmly stepped off her cot, walked across the room, grabbed the bringsel (the stick Ruby retrieves to alert), and brought it to me.

My heart was racing.

It was actually happening!

I quickly checked Faith's blood sugar. It was 160. Not a bad number and not a high or a low. Ruby alerts a high for anything over 180 and a low as anything under 100.

I was disappointed, but figured Ruby was allowed to make a mistake. This was the first day, and Faith, as a toddler, did come with a lot of unusual smells.

I put Ruby back on her cot, put Faith to bed, and started clearing the table and washing the dishes from supper.

A few minutes later, Ruby alerts again. I think to myself that I know Faith is fine, but for the sake of Ruby's training I'll humor her and check again.

In the less than 15 minutes Faith's blood sugar had dropped to 80! The active, exciting day we'd had was catching up with us!

Chuck and I were overjoyed and completely in awe! Ruby had warned us that a low was coming!

Because Faith was dropping so quickly, I gave her enough fast acting sugar to boost her blood sugar about 100 points. (Which, by the way, was only about 3-5 grams of carbs.)

I put Ruby back on her cot, and left Faith in her bed. (She was asleep - yes she can both eat and drink in her sleep. Part of the type 1 gig.)

I went back to the dishes with a plan to recheck Faith in a few minutes, but sure that she would be fine.

15 minutes later, Ruby alerts again. We recheck Faith. Her blood sugar was 65!

Chuck and I can't believe it! We are so grateful.

I give Faith another round of fast acting sugar that would normally boost her at least 100 points in blood sugar.

I put Ruby back on her cot, and I go back to what I was doing. Paying very close attention to Faith and Ruby, but again sure that I'd given Faith enough to correct the low.

15 minutes later, Ruby alerts again! We recheck Faith and her blood sugar is 55!

Another 15 minutes, another alert, blood sugar down to 50. Another round of sugar.

I am completely in awe at this point. I put Ruby back on her cot, and this time I just sit there crying and watching my two girls sleep. Just waiting for whatever was coming next.

15 minutes comes and goes and Ruby doesn't alert.

I half-jokingly tell Chuck that I think I already broke the dog.

I ask Ruby if we need to check and she just sits there.

I check Faith anyway and her blood sugar was 110. Ruby didn't alert because Faith was above 100! How amazing is this dog?

Chuck and I sat there overwhelmingly grateful to God for this incredible gift.

On a normal night at home I wouldn't have checked Faith's blood sugar again for at least 2 hours after that blood sugar of 160.

Thank God for Ruby.

As fast as Faith's blood sugar was dropping and as resistant as it was to correction, it's terrified us to think of what we'd found in Faith's bed at that next blood sugar check.

Ruby started saving Faith's life that first night and she hasn't let us down since. What a blessing she is to us.

This is a picture of Ruby watching over Faith that night. These girls have slept next to each other every single night since that first amazing night when Ruby saved our precious baby girl.

The Call That Changed Everything

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Wed, 10 Aug 2011 05:23:00 +0000

This post is part of a series called Where's Wuby? Wednesdays where I'll post a new story about Ruby, or diabetic alert dogs in general. Ruby is a service dog trained to detect high and low blood sugars in Faith and notify me. She has changed our lives and dramatically improved Faith's blood sugar control.

If there was ever anything you wanted to know about these dogs, or how they work, ask away and I'll try to answer the best I can; or if you are just as amazed as me at how God created these animals, I hope you'll enjoy reading about the incredible experiences we've had so far with our Ruby.

In the meantime, you can follow Faith and Wuby on Facebook by clicking Here.

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You can read the first part of this story here.

Ok, so back to how Ruby came to be our "angel with fur".

The trainer called to tell me the most incredible news! She began with so, you remember that I told you not to get your hopes up about a DAD? And remember how I told you that it can take years to be matched up with the right DAD, and how it would be a long hard wait? And remember how I told you that because of Faith's unique situation (being a baby at the time, not even 18 months old), it would take a very special dog?

I wanted to scream, "Yes! I remember all that, you're killing me! Get to the point!" :) I could tell she was getting to something big.

Let me back up a minute and say that Wildrose had a group of trained DADs that were already matched up with diabetics and set to go home with them. These dogs had to be placed and a new batch of puppies started before we could even begin to dream about a DAD of our own. Among that batch of trained DADs was a one-in-a-million dog named Ruby. Ruby had been matched up with someone who at the last minute had decided against getting a DAD. Service dogs are a LOT of responsibility and alter every aspect of your life, and thus aren't a decision to take lightly.

Anyway, when Wildrose began looking at Ruby's specific gifts, and looking at their list of diabetics waiting to be matched up with the right DAD, they noticed right away that Faith and Ruby were a perfect match!

The trainer still wanted to proceed with caution. A DAD had not been successfully matched up with a diabetic as young as Faith and no one could say for sure how it would work. Among the many complex things a DAD must learn, Ruby would have to possess a few special attributes. (This is not an exhaustive list.)

A DAD for Faith would have to be able to look to me at all times as her handler, but watch Faith at all times as her responsibility. (Talk about multitasking!)
They would have to be VERY calm and low energy, so as not to overwhelm or scare Faith. (Or hurt her by being too rough)
They would have to be VERY obedient at ALL times, so that I could handle having a service dog, a diabetic toddler, and 3 other children under the age of 7...Every.where.I.go. You want to feel a pressure cooker environment? Try checking out at WalMart while a crowd gathers, your diabetic baby's blood sugar plummets while she screams bloody murder, your other 3 are asking for every snack they see in line, your DAD is getting hyper and excited because they are alerting, the customer behind you grows impatient, and the cashier wants to ask a hundred questions about your "precious dawg". Throw in a few "Oh. My. Gawd. There's a dog in here!" and "Oh my, is that woman blind?" comments and you've got a good time on your hands. It was IMPERATIVE that our DAD be calm and quiet in ALL situations, because with a very young diabetic it would be up to me to handle every single aspect of that *super fun* situation.
The DAD would have to be steady in ALL situations. It's one thing to accompany a diabetic everywhere. It's another entirely to accompany a diabetic that screams and cries ALOT, wreaks of drool and dirty diapers (drool that may smell of a previous high or low blood sugar - talk about complicating things), pulls your tail and ears... (God bless Ruby...)

There was no way to know if or how this match up would work, without just giving it a go.

The trainer asked us if we could come to Mississippi to meet Ruby.

Uh. Yeah!

Oh. Wait.

We only really started fundraising the day before.

And only had $100.

Not the deposit, not the money needed to buy all the DAD supplies, not the money to spend a week in Mississippi - not even close to the nearly $10K needed.

It was discussed that if I could come up with the deposit, and the money to get to Mississippi, then there were two possible funders for the remainder. One of which had already heard Faith's story and wanted to help.

But HOW would I come up with the deposit and travel expenses so quickly?

I got off the phone with my mind spinning! I immediately called Chuck, and prayed, but quickly got busy with the kids and dinner. All evening I kept thinking about how in the world I was going to come up with the money for Ruby.

After dinner I got a phone call from the friend that had felt God telling her that Faith would have a DAD. She was calling to tell me that ...

SHE HAD THE DEPOSIT FOR THE DAD!

She had no idea that I had gotten a call earlier that day about a possible match up for Faith. She still thought we had AT LEAST a year to fundraise! I hadn't had a chance to call her yet and give her the news!

I immediately started screaming and crying. My kids started crying and fell to their knees thanking God. It was the most incredible experience.

I'll never forget what my friend told me when I explained to her why I was so excited about having the deposit. She said, "Honey, my God owns the cattle on a thousand hills, and if He wants Faith to have one little ole' dog then she'll have it!"

I was OVERJOYED and SO GRATEFUL to have the deposit and be one step closer - but how would we swing a week long trip to Mississippi?

I texted my other friend that had offered to help with fundraising to share the news. She was in the middle of a party, so I didn't call her. Almost immediately my phone rang. I answered and it was my friend. She'd excused herself from her party to call and tell me that she'd heard from her church, and they wanted to pay for the expenses to travel to Mississippi!

I couldn't believe it! God has done some amazing things in our lives, so I don't know why I was so blown away, but I was!

So, in one day I went from planning to fundraise and wait at LEAST a year for the right DAD, to potentially being matched with the perfect DAD and having the money needed to go get her!

To say I was over the moon would be an understatement.

But, the trainer kept cautioning me that it might not work out, that Ruby might not be right for our family.

Two weeks later we were in Mississippi meeting Ruby and we've never looked back!

Next week I'll tell you about that first meeting and how Ruby very literally saved Faith's life on their very first night together. I also have a picture of the moment they met. :)

Making The Switch...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Mon, 08 Aug 2011 04:41:00 +0000

Well, I jinxed us in one of my last posts, I think. Just a few days after I mentioned that we hadn't been on MDI (multiple daily injections) for over a year, we found ourselves having to go back on MDI.

Last Sunday we spent the day at a friends birthday pool party. Faith is on the Animas One Touch Ping insulin pump. One of the reasons we went with this pump is the fact that it is waterproof. People (myself included) are always amazed that she can bathe and swim with it on (or drop it in the toilet) without ruining it, but she really can.

That is, when she hasn't messed with it.

Like the first time, when she had somehow popped the audio bolus button off - and I didn't find out until we'd spent the ENTIRE day at the spray park. Oh, yeah and that was late in the evening, so Animas couldn't overnight it until the next day - leaving us on MDI for a couple days. With full strength insulin. And a baby with a correction factor of something like 1:375. Fun times.

Or the next time, just a few days later when she was teething...on her insulin pump...and chewed off the front buttons. Seriously, she was out of my sight for like 20 minutes.

Or the 100 times that she's pulled off (and lost) the audio bolus button, which causes it to no longer be waterproof - which causes us to have no choice to order a replacement.

Or the times she's played with the cartridge and loosened it enough for it to lose prime.

Or the scariest times when she's twisted off the cartridge cap and played with a cartridge full of (life-saving, yet lethal in the wrong dose) insulin - squeezing enough insulin into her body to kill her within minutes. Thank God for Ruby alerting us to that and saving Faith's life. That's a story I'll tell yall on one of the Where's Wuby? Wednesdays.

This latest time, last weekend, there was a pinhole in that darn audio bolus button. She got out of the pool to eat some birthday cake, and when I grabbed her pump to bolus her I couldn't get the buttons to unlock. And then I noticed water bubbling up out of the middle of the audio bolus button. And then the screen went black. Ugh.

I think we're on our 6th (ish, I've lost count) replacement pump. In a year.

I have to say, Animas' customer service has been GREAT.

Every time Faith breaks her pump I call and explain, and expect them to give me grief, but they never have. They just overnight us a new one.

And we've tried EVERYTHING to limit her access to her pump. We've put her pump in a pocket on her back, locked the pump in a pump belt, scolded her - you name it. Nothing has worked consistently to prevent her from meddling with her pump. Imagine tying a cell phone to your toddler and telling them not to touch it.

At this point, it feels about like handing her a loaded gun to play with and asking her to not pull the trigger. She doesn't have any idea how much power (or danger) she holds in her hand.

After much prayerful consideration we have decided to switch to the OmniPod insulin pump. It has its own set of challenges, but it solves our immediate (and major) problems by eliminating buttons and insulin cartridges from the equation.

We were incredibly blessed to have an anonymous donor step forward to pay for the entire thing. We are so thankful.

So in the next week or so we will be making the switch. We'll keep you posted.

Where's Wuby? Wednesdays!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Wed, 03 Aug 2011 05:07:00 +0000

By now, most of you know that we have a diabetic alert dog. Ruby is a service dog trained to detect high and low blood sugars in Faith and notify me. She has changed our lives and dramatically improved Faith's blood sugar control. (sidenote: I loathe that "control" word. I never ever feel like things are under "control".)
I'm always being asked questions about Ruby and love telling stories about her, so I've decided to make that a regular thing around here. Starting today we'll have Where's Wuby? Wednesdays where I'll post a new story about Ruby, or diabetic alert dogs in general. If there was ever anything you wanted to know about these dogs, or how they work, ask away and I'll try to answer the best I can; or if you are just as amazed as me at how God created these animals, I hope you'll enjoy reading about the incredible experiences we've had so far with our Ruby.

To start things off, I'll repost something I wrote in October of 2010 telling the story leading up to Ruby joining our family. I promise to come back and finish the story this time. :)

In the meantime, you can follow Faith and Wuby on Facebook by clicking Here.

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Oh, I've wanted to write this post for several weeks. It's going to be long, but there's SO much to catch you up on!

We have been experiencing a time of INCREDIBLE blessings! Gosh, I don't know where to start...so how 'bout the beginning?

One day I was at a friends house and we were all sitting around the table chatting over coffee while our kids (we have 11 collectively...) played outside. On the table laid a Focus On The Family Clubhouse Jr. magazine. I absentmindedly picked it up and started flipping through it. Why? WHY was I looking through a children's magazine when I was sitting there enjoying the first grown up conversation I'd had in weeks?? (I now know it's because God put it in front of me.) A picture of a German Shepherd dog caught my eye so I read a bit to see what it was about...only to discover that it was a diabetic alert dog! I exclaimed, "WHAT!!??" to my friends. (Who thought I'd lost my mind...or had tourette's or something..lol) I read on to find out that this dog alerted his boy to high or low blood sugar and even woke his mom up during the night to let her know the boy was low.

I HAD to find out more about this!

What a blessing this could be to Faith and I!

As soon as I got home, I got online and started researching and reading everything I could get my hands on. I didn't even know if it would be possible to train a dog to alert for a child as little as Faith, but I was determined to find out! I started telling everyone I talked to about it and posting links about alert dogs on my facebook page. Some people thought I was crazy, others were supportive.

The first day I posted something online about it a friend of mine called me and said, "Sarah, I've been praying for you all morning. Praying that God would send you some kind of help in taking care of Faith! Something to help shoulder the load...and I got on Facebook and saw your post about the diabetic alert dog (or DAD). Sarah, I feel it in my spirit that this is how God is answering that prayer!" She said, "Research it and pray about it and let me know if I can help you get a DAD for Faith." I prayed (ALOT) about it and sent out emails to every email address I could find online telling them our story and asking them if they could point me in the right direction to find more information. I got some pretty crazy responses and some very helpful ones. One (unscrupulous) place responded with "I have a labradoodle for $15,000. Call me." That was it! No questions about Faith's condition, our lifestyle, personality, NOTHING. I immediately hit DELETE on that one!

Over the next few weeks I kept praying and kept researching and just felt God leading me to a kennel in Mississippi called Wildrose Kennels. What I didn't know is that the dog that I had found in my first few days of research that I had been so impressed with was a Wildrose dog...

and one of the sites that I had found that had been very helpful was created by a Wildrose trainer...

and a sweet lady that I spoke to online about DADs was a trainer for Wildrose!

When all these pieces came into focus I knew that God was leading me to Wildrose. There are many places training DADs (some better than others) and out of all those places I just kept coming back (unbeknownst to me) to Wildrose. Chuck and I decided we'd pray about it one more day and if we still felt God leading us there then we would apply for a dog from Wildrose.

The next morning I sent in the application. A short while later I got word from the trainer at Wildrose that they would be going through the applications the next day and selecting people that they would train a DAD for. I immediately sent out a prayer request asking my friends to join me in praying that Faith's story would stand out. That those reading it would be touched by it and wouldn't be able to get away from it. A few hours later I got an email from the trainer at Wildrose saying that she was re-reading Faith's story and reliving her own daughter's diagnosis with every word! I felt like this was just a little bit of confirmation from the Lord that we were on the right track!

Later that night I got another email from her...the one I'd been praying and waiting for! She said that WR was willing to train a dog for Faith, but that it would be a long process because we had to find just the right dog with just the right temperament. One with the ability to focus on and listen to me as it's handler and focus on Faith as it's girl. She painted this bleak picture so I would understand and be prepared for the LOOOOONG wait ahead of us. She warned me that if there wasn't the right dog in the next batch of puppies then we would have to wait even longer. There are families that have been waiting YEARS for the right DAD. She wasn't being negative, just realistic. I believed fully that God had a dog for Faith at this point so I wasn't discouraged a bit...only hopeful.

It was late so I sent emails to my two friends that had offered to head up fundraisers letting them know that we were accepted and that we officially needed to be FUND-raising! We needed to come up with a deposit asap. Then we had the rest of the year (at least) to come up with the remaining roughly $10K we thought it would take to purchase the dog and allow us to travel for Mississippi for a week for training when the dog was ready! I couldn't imagine how, but I just knew God was going to provide the money. I went to bed that night OVERJOYED!

The next morning by 9am I had heard from one of my friends that we had $100 in our fundraising account! I was thrilled! Wow!, I thought, just a couple hours into the day and we're already at $100!! That afternoon I got all the kiddos down for a nap and curled up in bed to catch a nap myself. I don't get much sleep during the night from checking Faith's bg at least every 2 hours so I try to nap when the kids do as much as possible. I fell asleep praying. I was just talking to God about how every aspect of Faith's diabetes had stretched me out of my comfort zone and how I knew I could trust him and I knew his timing was perfect..but I really felt like I needed help NOW...but that I wanted his perfect will so I was trusting that his timing would be perfect. I fell asleep praying that and was woke up by the phone ringing and it was the trainer from Wildrose. She said she needed to talk to me and asked if I had a minute...of course I did.

Ok, this is getting long. I'll continue in the following post with what happened next...

One Of These Things Is Not Like The Other

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 04:40:00 +0000

Which one of these things just doesn't belong?

Do you see it? The insulin syringe?
(Thank God it's capped!)

Wanna know the sad part?

We haven't been on MDI (shots) in over a year...

(There is an affiliate link in this post.)

Too big for her britches...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 02:13:00 +0000

Today at supper time Ruby alerted. Faith took it upon herself to grab her meter and check herself.

Thank goodness I had my phone handy to capture the first time Faith has done it herself from start to finish.

Here's the bittersweet moment...

How can she be this grown up at 29 months old?

Ugh...What fun we're having...

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Sat, 18 Jun 2011 06:08:00 +0000

One of these days I'm gonna get on here and have something so positive and uplifting to say you won't believe it.

Today is NOT that day.

Faith's numbers are ALL. OVER. THE. PLACE. We've been waiting to see if it's due to the infection that had us in the hospital last week, the heat, or a growth spurt...or maybe even because the wind blew, or we weren't holding our tongue right...

Sometimes, it's hard to tell with diabetes.

Anyway, we haven't wanted to make any permanent (HA! permanent until next week when it changes again) basal changes until we could decipher what was causing it and find a pattern. (Again, HA!)

If it weren't for Ruby these past few weeks I don't know what we'd do. Faith's numbers have been low, low, low. Since getting Ruby it's VERY rare that Faith's numbers get below 80; because, as most of you know by now, Ruby catches it - and alerts me - BEFORE Faith is low - so I can usually boost her with a few carbs and we avoid the low. The past couple weeks, however, we've had multiple low numbers a day (and night - *super fun*).

Like, actual lows. 40's and 50's lows.

NOT because Ruby hasn't alerted, but because even when she catches it at 130 or 140, I can't shove enough sugar in Faith's face (ok, I'm a little gentler than that...but tonight this is how it feels...) before her bg has plummeted.

But wait! That's not all! (Think: infomercial. Buy now and we'll double your offer...)

Did I mention she's got small ketones? So, try to back off the insulin to avoid the lows and - you guessed it (or maybe you didn't...) - ketones go up!

This has gone on for over a week. (Yes, please. Shoot me now.)

We decide to do a temp 20% basal reduction for 24 hours, keep a close eye on the ketones, and LOG LOG LOG every move we make to look for patterns. Worked pretty well. Still had a couple lows, but they were 70's low, not 40's lows - so, definitely a step in the right direction. AND, the ketones finally went away.

Thought things looked promising, until tonight...

We're walking through Wal-Mart, enjoying our usual fish-bowl experience (you wouldn't believe the people that stop and stare, or circle around for 3rd or 4th looks, or talk about us like we are not there - seriously people, it's absurd, but that's another post), when Ruby alerts that Faith is low.

We check and she is 81.

Gave Faith 6 grams of carbs and continued on our way. 30 minutes and a recheck later and Faith's bg hasn't moved much. It's going to be another hour or so before we eat supper so I decide to give her another 3.5 carbs (3 and a HALF carbs, people) to *hopefully* boost her until we eat - but not so much that she's high at mealtime.

We finish up at Wal-Mart and decide to run through Wendy's, because we still have about a 40 minute drive home...and given the pattern over the last couple weeks, Faith's bg may not hold that long.

While we're waiting in the drive-thru line, I ask JC to check Faith's bg. He did, and when it beeped he said, "um, Mom, it says HI."

WHAT?! That's not possible. HI means her bg is over 600.

"Did you clean her finger well, JC?"

"Yes ma'am, with an alcohol wipe."

"Ok, well, that doesn't seem right, so let's check again to be sure."

Chuck gets out and checks her this time to be sure we get her finger wiped off really well.

Her meter is still yelling "HI" at us. (and believe me, it wasn't just being friendly...)

UGH! We're talking less than 10 grams of carbs sent her from 80 to over 600 in an hour...and the beautiful thing with a "HI" reading is that you don't know how far over 600 we're talking. Is it 601 or 801?

My mind starts racing.

Has her site gone bad? Well, maybe, but not that bad, that fast - surely...

Did she grab some candy or something when I wasn't looking? Anything's possible, but she was sitting in the buggy and I was pushing it so SURELY I would have noticed that...

What do I do?

Here I sit in the car with 4 hungry kids that can smell their food...but I can't possibly give Faith carbs when her bg is over 600...and I can't let everyone eat in front of her.

What fun we're having.

Pull over and give Faith a correction via injection in case her site has gone bad. I just can't fathom driving home 40 minutes with her bg north of 600...but it makes me SO nervous to give her much of a correction, because it just doesn't make sense that her bg could possibly be that high! I mean, HOW is that possible??

Drive home 40 minutes with Faith screaming because we gave her a shot (or because she's over 600...or because she's NOT over 600 and I just shot her up with a lethal dose of insulin and she's crashing...or because she's 2 and mad that she can see her kid's meal but can't eat it...who knows?), and I'm bawling my eyes out wondering if I've done the right thing and racking my brain trying to figure out what the heck is going on.

Get home and her bg is 147. A great number...UNLESS she was 600 forty minutes ago!

She eats her chicken and french fries and Ruby alerts, so I check her bg again. 108.

Dangit.

I give her a bit more food. (But, now I'm scared to give her too much...but seriously, at this point - when 3.5 carbs sent her over 600 - how much is too much??)

20 minutes later her bg is 140, and it's time to start getting ready for bed.

30 minutes later Ruby alerts and she's low again.

Give Faith a tiny bit of yogurt - *hoping* the protein/fat/whatever will keep her bg up through the night and not wanting to overcorrect in case any of her supper is slow to absorb.

Now, here I sit...Faith is high, it's 1 am, we have baseball games first thing in the morning, I'm exhausted, Faith is walking and talking in her sleep...

Ugh...What fun we're having...

I'm Full Up

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Sat, 07 May 2011 05:43:00 +0000

Whenever my little kids refer to something that is filled they say it's "full up". That's how I feel lately.

I've spent the past three weekends surrounded by hundreds of people that don't know anything about Faith and Ruby. This has provided me with MANY opportunities to educate about service dogs and diabetes, but most importantly it's allowed me to share all that God has done in our lives in the past year or so.

The first weekend we were at a leadership training conference with thousands of children and their families. As always, we stood out like a sore thumb with Ruby by our side. I spent each day explaining to hundreds of people just why Ruby was with us, what she is trained to do, how she came to live with us, why she is important to Faith's care with Type 1 diabetes, and (especially) why they couldn't pet her. In my opinion, this is the most trying aspect of having a service dog.

So many people get offended when we won't just let them pet Ruby, and act like we're being mean or mistreating Ruby in some way by not letting her interact with them. If they only knew how much we love this amazing dog - and how much she loves her job! You can tell really quickly whether or not people are open to an explanation about Ruby or if we need to just graciously walk away. It can really begin to wear on you!

By the end of the second day of this conference I was just so drained. Faith had just had a very symptomatic low that resulted in a crowd of people gathered around staring as I shoved cake icing into my hysterically screaming baby girl. I just wanted to go home. I was trying to get on an elevator when I noticed a lady walking through the crowd. I could tell she was headed right for me. I tried to avoid eye contact and thought, 'Ugh, please just let me get on this elevator'. Next thing I knew she was standing right beside me. I looked up and smiled at her, and she said:

"um, Hi, I just wanted to tell you that you must be the most patient person on the planet! I have been watching you all weekend and I bet I have seen you explain about your dog to a hundred people. I've been so impressed watching you speak to every person as if it's the first person you've talked to. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that."

Wow. Thank you Jesus for that encouragement! I SO needed to hear that at that moment.

If you ever feel the urge to say something nice to someone - PLEASE do! The Holy Spirit is trying to use you to lift someone up and you may never know just how much they needed to hear it!

As I drove home that day thinking back over our weekend I couldn't contain the tears. I had been so exhausted from the weekend, but as I thought back over all my interactions I couldn't help but feel overwhelmed by how God is using Faith and Ruby. All weekend people were marveling at God's creation wondering how a dog could have the ability to detect blood sugar levels...and praising God for his miraculous provision in bringing Faith and Ruby together.

Wow. I drove the rest of the way home with my heart "full up."

"No, Mommy!! Pweeease NO!"

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Thu, 10 Feb 2011 04:10:00 +0000

I hate these words and the fact that when it comes to diabetes I often can't respect them, when Faith is screaming for me to stop.

We are having a major "I hate diabetes" day around here...and of course it happens on the day that I have to change her pump.

Normally Faith is a trooper and will lay down still and quiet while I insert her pump.

Not today...

Me: "Faith, where do you want your pump today?" (We rotate sites, but I allow her to choose where as much as possible)

Faith: "In the couch."

Me: "In the couch? haha No, baby, where on YOU do you want your pump?"

Faith: through tears "I want my 'bump' IN the COUCH!"

Me: "I know baby. I'm sorry. We have to put it on you, though, so where should we put it?"

Faith: now falling apart "NO, Mommy!! Pweeease NO! Put it in the couch!!"

Me: "Baby girl, I can't put it in the couch and you've had it out for a while for your bath - we've got to put it in now. See Ruby? She's telling me your blood sugar is getting too high. We need to get it in. Do you want me to put it in your bottom today? Do you wanna try the back of your arm?"

Faith: now a puddle in the floor "No, Mommy! Pwease don't stick me, PWEASE!! DON'T. STICK. ME. PWEASE!"

Her blood sugar is just getting higher and higher. At this point I have no choice but to ignore her pleas and insert her infusion set.

She screams and kicks away from me and the set comes out.

So, now, not only do I have to stick her with a needle through her screams for me to stop - I have to do it twice.

At this point I'm ready to be laying in the floor crying with her.

The next time I make sure I hold her down better - which only makes me feel worse and her more upset - and get her pump inserted and taped down good, before she has a chance to kick free.

By the time it was over she'd gotten so upset she was throwing up. I had to rock her for at least twenty minutes afterward to calm her down.

During her nap her bg shot up to 350 and stayed there despite a correction. Please tell me this site hasn't already gone bad! Not today!

About an hour later her bg started to come down. No extra pump change needed. Thank you, Jesus.

There are certainly worse things, but some days I really hate diabetes.

Perspective

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 28 Jan 2011 05:04:00 +0000

Just an ordinary medicine cup, but take a look inside...

Looks pretty innocuous, right?

This drop, this tiny drop, is 15 units of insulin.

Two days worth for Faith.

If withheld, it could make Faith sick enough to kill her.

If given all at once it would kill her.

I read once that insulin is one of only two medicines that a nurse has to get another nurse to double check before administering to a patient. Yet, I find myself doling it out on the fly, sleep deprived (*understatement), based on varying factors - many of which can't be quantified (growth, stress, the effect activity or the weather will play on bgs that day...), while juggling all the other responsibilities of the day.

No pressure, right?

**Insulin is not administered from a medicine cup. It must be given subcutaneously. This is just an illustration.

Grace and the Impromptu Spelling Test

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Tue, 25 Jan 2011 18:27:00 +0000

(or, maybe more appropriately titled, "Why I'm Turning Gray")

So, I was working on a spelling test with Grace.

I told her the first word is math.

She spelled it out loud m-a-t-h (when she was supposed to write it),

I high fived her and told her to go write her work,

Grace: work w-o-r-k
Me: very funny Grace
Grace: funny f-u-n-n-y
Me: Grace, go write your word
Grace: write w-r-i-t-e
Me: now
Grace: now n-o-w
Me: pronto!
Grace: pronto p-r-o-n-t-o
Me: child!
Grace: child c-h-i-l-d
Me: Get it done!
Grace: get it done g-e-t-i-t-d-o-n-e
Me: GO!
Grace: go g-o
Me: I'm going to choke you
Grace: hmmm, I-little mark at the top-m-g-o-i-n-g-t-o-c-h-o-k-e-y-o-u
Me: (I pretend I'm going to flick the end of her nose)
Grace: flick f-l-i-c-k
Me: aaaaaaghhhh!!!
Grace: aaaaaghhhh a-a-a-a....

So, at this point I'm laughing... so I stop talking and start typing some homework on my laptop...
her clever little butt says: type t-y-p-e

Pray for me...

Timing

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Mon, 24 Jan 2011 04:41:00 +0000

I'm in awe of God's timing.

He has really been showing me this week that I can trust Him.

My husband's cousin, Richard, passed away this last week. I only met him once. While I was very sad for my husband and his side of our family, his death affected me in a very different, personal (albeit selfish) way. Richard was a Type 1 Diabetic and only 31 yrs old. I'm sure you can all imagine where my mind went with that one.

The enemy was really using this to fill me with fear. I was really struggling and crying out to God. Was I doing enough to keep Faith as safe as possible?

I have been having a terrible time with Faith's blood sugar these past few weeks (months?). I was sure her a1c was going to be something absurd, like 15, or something. I was so upset over her blood sugar, that I'd sent poor Dr Casas a ridiculously long email lamenting over my lack of control over her morning blood sugars.

This was all adding up to one seriously anxious, fearful me.

The next day we had Faith's 3 month Endo appointment. Instead of Dr C threatening to take Faith away from me because I was the worst D mom EVER (like he had in my nightmares the night before), we got great news! Despite all the trouble we'd had over the past few months, her a1c was still great! I can't tell you the relief that washed over me.

That night I had an orientation for my college algebra class. During class the instructor stopped MID SENTENCE to exclaim (to me), "Wow, you look REALLY tired", before resuming lecturing without skipping a beat.

Wow. Thanks. If you only knew.

Despite the good news I'd gotten at Dr. C's office earlier that day, I was still in a funk.

As I was walking out of my algebra class, I got an email from my friend, Margie. She is the Executive Director of Tyler Type One, and one of the first people I met after Faith was diagnosed. She and her family have become very important to me.

She had been looking through her desk THAT DAY and found the sheet of paper that she had written our info on when Dr C had called to notify her of our diagnosis. She scanned it and sent me a picture of the page. She said she just grabs whatever scrap of paper she can reach when he calls, and our info "just happened" to be written on her dad's ministry letterhead! Her dad is someone that I've grown to love very much over this past year. He has been such an encouragement to us.

I could not have anticipated how emotional seeing that would make me. I immediately started bawling. (If only the professor could see me then...he'd have really thought I'd lost it...)

It was just another small affirmation that God has been in this from the beginning and will continue to carry us the rest of the way.

It was amazing. Like God had sent me the email himself!

The next day we had our Tyler Type One support group. This month we had a panel of veteran type 1 families answering questions and encouraging us newbies with their stories. One of them shared that their dad was an 87 year old type 1 diabetic that was in pretty great health.

I SO needed to hear that this week!!

After the meeting, a friend handed me a box of infusion sets. She had no idea, but I was down to my last one waiting for a shipment to come in! The next morning, Faith's infusion set got pulled out causing me to have to put her last one in and the shipment didn't come in like it was supposed to. God knew that and sent me a box the night before!

How's THAT for perfect timing?

He really is faithful, you know?

We sang this song at church this morning and it really spoke to me:

King of Glory by Third Day

Who is this King of Glory that persues me with his love
And haunts me with each hearing of His softly spoken words
My conscience, a reminder of forgiveness that I need
Who is this King of Glory who offers it to me

Who is this King of angels, O blessed Prince of Peace
Revealing things of Heaven and all its mysteries
My spirit¹s ever longing for His grace in which to stand
Who's this King of glory, Son of God and son of man

His name is Jesus, precious Jesus
The Lord Almighty, the King of my heart
The King of glory

Who is this King of Glory with strength and majesty
And wisdom beyond measure, the graceous King of kings
the Lord of Earth and Heaven, the Creator of all things
Who is this King of Glory, He's everything to me

The Lord of Earth and Heaven, the Creator of all things

He is the King of glory, He's everything to me

What used to be there?

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Mon, 24 Jan 2011 00:57:00 +0000

What did I used to think about?

I can't remember, but my mind is always racing - so I know there was something occupying the space that "it" now takes up.

I laid down to take a much needed nap after church today. An hour later I looked up and realized that I had laid there thinking about "it" for at least half of my precious nap time.

"It" is diabetes. Sometimes, I hate "it".

I laid there for an hour with my eyes closed thinking...

"Is carb factoring really superior to carb counting? There was that one time that I used carb factoring for birthday cake and it came out great. Is it worth the learning curve it will take to be proficient at it on the fly? Can I even understand it? Will Chuck be resistant to it? Does anyone I know use it and I've just somehow missed it? Will her a1c suffer? Is her a1c really that good? Is it abnormally good for a 1 yr old or are other endo's just more aggressive? Am I doing enough? Will Faith take good care of herself in the future? What will I do if she doesn't? Is it a rule that she will rebel against her diabetes care as a teen? Is it possible she won't? Do I know anyone who hasn't? I need to look for someone who hasn't and study that situation. How can I help her accept and embrace it? Oh, I hear Ruby coming...Already?? What time is it? WHAT!?? I've been laying here for an HOUR??"

Good grief...Obsess much? No wonder I'm tired.

Dear Faith,

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Wed, 17 Nov 2010 19:45:00 +0000

Well, Sugar Britches, we made it through the first year.

There were times I wondered whether or not we would. November 17, 2009 changed our lives forever. You have been put through the ringer over the past 12 months, but you've handled it like such a trooper. Your daddy and I couldn't be prouder of you! When I got the news that you had Type 1 Diabetes I was devastated. I could never have imagined how God would use your life story. It is amazing and humbling. I hope you will grow up to realize and embrace how strong He can and wants to be in your weakness, and how much of a purpose and a plan he has for you. Lean on Him, baby girl, He won't fail you. I have really learned that this past year. I pray every day for a cure, but also that, in the meantime, your struggle will point others to Christ. I pray that your health will be good throughout your life. I hope you know that I try to take the best care of you that I possibly can. I do everything in my power to set you up for a healthy life and to reduce your risk of complications as much as possible. I pray that, when you're old enough to take over your care (like in 25ish years, ok?), you will go easy on me - that's going to be an interesting transition for both of us! I pray that you will not allow this disease to rob you of a full life. I pray that you will take ownership of your health, manage your diabetes the best you can, and LIVE.

I pray that you know, really know, how very much your dad, brothers, sister, and I love you...but most of all, I pray that you will grow to understand how much God loves you.

I would take this disease on for you in a heartbeat, if I could...but I can't. So I will always be here for you...every step of the way. I won't stop praying and I won't take a break until you can.

I love you, Sweet Faify Bidness.

-Mom

This was taken the first time you stood up again after your diagnosis. It was 3 days later.

You were so sick. :( For a while, the hospital was our home away from home.

Dear JC, Grace, & Eli,

I know this past year has been hard on the three of you as well. I know it hasn't been easy to watch your baby sister be so sick, so often. I know it gets scary sometimes. You are all so quick to pray for Faith when it gets rough and that has been such a good example for me. Your childlike faith reminds me to run to our heavenly Father when I'm afraid. Thank you for that. I know it can't be easy to watch your baby sister get so much more attention. I know it is hard to understand all that has gone on. The way you have handled yourselves this past year makes your daddy and I SO very proud of you. You have been understanding and compassionate. Faith could not possibly ask for better siblings to walk with down this road. I pray every day that each of you will know how very much I love you. I pray that you will somehow understand WHY your sister needs more attention sometimes and that you'll never feel slighted or jealous. You are all so very precious to me. I love you more than I can ever express to you. I pray that each of you will see that God loves you even more than that!! (all the way to Jesus and back ;) I pray that you will continue to grow closer to Jesus and love and serve Him all your lives.

You make me SO very proud to be your momma.

I love you, Handsome Man, Sister Bidness, and Eebs...very, very much.

-Mom

Good Save, Wuby the Wonder Dog!!

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 04:40:00 +0000

I know I still haven't finished typing our story about how the Lord blessed us with Ruby, please bear with me. I have to tell you a story of how she saved Faith tonight, though.

Thank God for sending us Ruby. What a blessing she is to me. She allows me to treat lows conservatively, because I know that if Faith's bg doesn't come up (like it's not tonight) she will let me know.

We had spaghetti and garlic bread for dinner. Before the meal Faith's bg was 248 (too high). Faith ate really well. I was very careful to weigh and measure all her food. I dosed her insulin AFTER her meal, and dosed conservatively. I didn't give her an entire correction for the high and I treated her for 35 fewer carbs than she actually ate. We've been having alot of lows overnight lately so I wanted to err on the side of caution and let her run a little bit high.

As Faith is getting down from the table, Ruby alerts. I know Faith must be crazy high because of the fact that I bolused her AFTER she ate THREE servings of spaghetti and garlic bread, so I tell Ruby that we would check in a little bit. We went about our evening routine of baths & pjs. During Faith's bath I noticed that her pump site was looking a little red, so I decided to change it. I took her to my room and Ruby alerted again. She was being very persistent and intense so I decided to go ahead and check Faith. Now, mind you, it had only been about 20ish minutes since I'd given Faith her insulin. I check Faith's bg and she was 73!! Wha?? Huh??? How??

The scary part - Faith has 1.66 units of insulin on board (in her bloodstream). Let me put that into perspective for you. That much insulin should theoretically bring Faith's bg down roughly 600 points!!!! You know, just enough to kill her....a couple times...

Faith wasn't displaying any low symptoms at all (not that she always does), so I reasoned that maybe her body was breaking down the carbs a little slowly and she would surely be crazy high in a minute. (She ate THREE servings of spaghetti, after all) I decided to finish putting in her pump and watch to see how Ruby reacted. Not quite 15 minutes later I hear Ruby whining from her place in the living room. Faith and I were in a completely different part of the house finishing up her pump change.

I recheck Faith's bg and she'd dropped to 55!! I grab a juicebox and have to force Faith to drink it. (She was full from her THREE...T.H.R.E.E. servings of (carb loaded) SPAGHETTI and garlic bread.)

15 minutes later Ruby alerts again. Recheck: 95.

Ok, she's coming up. Good low, Ruby, we're gonna watch her.

10 minutes later, Ruby gets off place, walks across the living room to get the bringsel, comes to me, gives me the bringsel, goes back to grab the meter..

Ok, Ruby we'll recheck.

Faith's bg had dropped back down to 85, but now she is starting to get shaky.

3 pkgs of Smarties later and Ruby alerts yet again. Recheck and Faith is only up to 97.

So, now Ruby and I sit here waiting to see what Faith's bg does.

Where did all those carbs go??? I have checked and double checked myself. I have looked in her seat and under the table. AAaaaaggghhh!!!

Good save, Ruby! Good save!

Normally, after nights like tonight, I would sleep in the floor next to Faith's bed or be running to her bedside all night. Tonight, I will not have to do that. This is why...

Thank you, Jesus.

What's in a name?

noreply@blogger.com (Sarah) — Tue, 09 Nov 2010 01:13:00 +0000

Ok, so this isn't specifically about diabetes, but it's about my diabetic child...

The following is an email I sent out in December of 2008 when I was 8(ish) months pregnant with Faith. This day, and the response I got from this email were the reasons Chuck and I chose the name Faith. Prior to this we were settled on a different name (that I can't recall at the moment...).

******************************************************************************************************
God is so good! I have to share just how I got to see Him work
Wednesday...Some of you have heard most of this story but everytime I tell
it I forget some part of it, plus I'm so excited about it I have to tell it
again...
I have the privilege of being the Awana Commander at my church & we had
Share Shop Wed night where the kids get to spend the Awana bucks they have
earned during the year..Anyway, I had to go to Tyler to pick up some things
to stock the 'store' with & so I called Rachel (my sister) & asked her if
she would ride with me...which I rarely do (most of you know our
relationship is rocky at best) but I thought she'd prob enjoy getting out of
the house & I wanted some company so I called her & she agreed to go with
me.. So, we take off to Tyler with the church credit card & stop at the
dollar tree. I load my buggy up & proceed through the checkout only to find
out (after she's rang up my $60 worth of $1 goodies) that they only take
Mastercards as debit cards with pin numbers..not credit. I remembered I had
Chucks Chrysler MC with me but didn't know if I'd be able to use it nor what
the pin was so I apologized to the cashier & asked her to void the
transaction & help the long line of customers behind me while I tried to get
Chuck or Preacher on the phone to try to figure out what my options were.
While I'm on the phone trying to reach them this lady walks up to me & says
"I'd like to pay for your purchase". Of course I thanked her profusely but
told her I couldn't let her do that cause I'd rang up $60 worth of stuff!!
She insisted & before I could stop her had walked over to the register &
paid for the stuff!! I apologized & thanked her (& thanked her & thanked
her) & asked her to please give me her name & address so I could get the
church to send her a reimbursement check & she wouldn't hear of it. She
wouldn't even tell me her name! She looked me in the eyes (and this part STILL gives me chills), laid her hand on my pregnant belly, and said, "Honey, trust me, you have enough to take care of." (OMG!!! In hindsight this leaves me speechless!!) After that, all she said was "Merry Christmas" & walked away!! I couldn't believe it! So after I picked my chin up off the floor & the bags of stuff I put Eli & Grace in the backseat of the suburban. By the
time Rachel & I got in the front seat Grace was praying (out loud) thanking
God for the blessing he'd just given us & the "angel he'd just sent to us".
Rachel heard this & just started bawling! When Grace was done she said,
"Mommy, we just met a real live angel didn't we?" & before I could even
respond Rachel spoke up & said "yes ma'am we sure did!" She was completely
taken aback! It was so incredible to see God use this lady I'd never met &
my 5 yr old daughter to show Himself to my sister that day not to mention
bless our Awana program in the process! Those of you who know Rachel know
what a big deal this is.. But, that's only the beginning! It had been my
desire to stock the store with some spiritually enriching items for many
reasons, one of which being the fact that many of our kids use this shopping
opportunity to 'purchase' gifts to give to family & friends. I just always
thought that could be an awesome opportunity to get Jesus' message into the
hands & homes of people that I might never even get to meet. Because of my
budget & the sheer number of items I needed to purchase I really didn't
think I'd be able to do that this time around BUT because of the generosity
of that lady that God had arranged to have at the $ tree (& GREAT Christmas
sales promotions) I was able to go over to Lifeway & The Scroll & purchase
Bibles & Christian CD's & all kinds of gifts that would help spread the
gospel! I was SO excited I couldn't stand it! So I take Rachel home & head
to the church to 'price' my loot. We meet for Awana Open Assembly & I share
with the kids how God had blessed us that day & allowed Grace & I to meet a
''real live angel''... Before I let either of the classes go 'shopping' I
challenged the kids to honor God with how they behaved & that I didn't want
any fighting over merchandise or stealing from each other (which we've
experienced in the past) Anyway the kids shopped their hearts out & because
of all God had done that day almost every child walked away with at least
one gift item with scripture and/or gospel message on it, 2 kids that said
they didn't have Bibles were able to buy themselves one (& not just any
Bible but fancy little kids study Bibles), & one girl even bought her
pregnant school teacher a Beginners Bible "to read to her baby"!! Plus if
that weren't enough, not only did I not get one single report of fighting or
stealing but the kids were buying gifts for each other and sharing their
Awana money with other kids that didn't have as much!! It was so moving!!
I was SO proud of them!!

As you can imagine I was flying pretty high, having an Awesome day when...
Chuck comes walking up to me with tears in his eyes & asks me 2 come with
him that he has something to tell me.. I have to be honest with you, deep
down I was thinkin come on, not something negative I'm having too good a
day! But I followed him out into the hallway & he hands me an envelope.. I
feel like I have to stop here & tell you things have been kinda rough
financially for us recently (along with the rest of the world). Most of you
know Chuck sells cars for a living & if you've..well, been awake.. in the
last few months you've heard the auto industry is not experiencing a banner
year. So we've had 2 specific needs that we've been praying about & quite
frankly were starting to get a little discouraged about..now don't get me
wrong, we believed God would provide, just weren't sure how or when..& when
I'd get weak & feel sorry for myself Chuck would say Sarah come on He's
never failed us before & I'd get irked cause I knew he was right (which
naturally irritates me, hahaha) and God has moved many people to be really
good to us recently BUT back to my point.. we had 2 specific needs that we'd
been praying about & when I opened the envelope I found an unsigned
Christmas card containing the answer to our prayers!!! I couldn't believe
it! We have no idea who it came from (except God, of course) but man, I
hope they somehow know how much of a blessing they are to us & how grateful
we are!! Chuck & I just stood there crying, unable to even wrap our minds
around what was taking place.
So, after we wrap up Awana I call my mom to share with her what an amazing
day I've had & learn that the $tree incident had such an impact on my sister
that she'd already called mom & told her all about it! All about what that
lady had done & Grace praying without being prompted at all & that "it just
HAD to be the Lord"! So then I got to call Rachel & tell her I'd been
visited by a 2nd angel that day!!
We get home & I'm tucking JC into bed & praying with him & get up to leave
his room & he stops & asks me if I'll stay in there with him while he prays.
So, of course I do and he prays the most precious prayer thanking Jesus for
the blessings he'd sent us that day & that while we didn't know what that
lady's name was he knew God did so would he please somehow let her know she
was a blessing to us & that we were "very grateful & appreciative" for what
she'd done! Man I hope that lady knows she invested $60 in so much more than
a buggy full of toys!!

Oh man, 24 hours later I'm still shaking my head. God is so good, but I
feel like that day He was showing off! I pray that reading this gives you
hope that whatever you're going through God is big enough to handle it if
you'll just trust Him to do so...& never under estimate how God can use you
if you let him. That lady at the $ tree & the people that gave to Chuck & I
may not have thought their contribution was much, but boy oh boy were they
ever wrong!! Little is much when God is in it...

I hope each one of you has a blessed day & a very Merry Christmas! I already
have..

Love, Sarah Wilson
*********************************************************************************************************

Ok, so excuse the run-on sentences. I was excited and typing all of that out on a small phone keypad!

So, after I sent this email out to EVERYONE in my address book, Chuck got a call from someone saying that they thought we needed to name our baby "Faith". Up to this point, this particular person hadn't been very supportive of our Christian faith and had even made comments that we were pushing it off on our children. After reading this, they said they could see that our kids truly get it, they were inspired by it, and they thought we should name our new baby Faith...so, we did!

Ok, on a side note - I am speaking at an event for DiabetesFriendly.org this weekend. Y'all pray that God speaks through me. This event feels WAY out of my league...they are fancy and well..y'all know, I'm not. I'm excited to do it, though. This is the foundation that donated about a third of the money for us to get Ruby. We are SO thankful for them! Y'all check out their site!

Also, I got some VERY exciting news about the next cool thing that God has placed before us. I can't share details just yet, but keep watching! It's going to be SO fun!! It's just a reminder to me, again, that God can do whatever he wants to!

Love y'all.