The Bohemian Cafe

Bring it on, I am ready!

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 06:13:00 +0000

Last Tuesday, I went to see my endocrinologist for a regular check up since I am a diabetic and have been feeling "under the weather" for quite a while. As part of the check up, he performed an ultrasound exam of my thyroid gland. I was impressed at his thoroughness and happily complied. The exam was painless and short. He took a few pictures and then sat down to write stuff on my file. I asked him what was the "verdict" and he told me, "you have two masses in your thyroid". Gulp! That was a totally unexpected answer. He proceeded to tell me that I need to have a biopsy done and scheduled me for this Thursday morning. Therefore, tomorrow morning I'll have to get up earlier than usual and my son will give me a ride to my biopsy. I will get the results next Thursday. I am not too worried because even if it turns out that the tumors are cancerous, I read in the Internet in one of the medical sites that thyroid cancer is one of the most curable ones.

Cancer has been quite predominant in my family. Most of my relatives on my mother's side died of one form of cancer or another. Moreover, cancer had the audacity to take my mom from me almost twenty years ago. In her case, it was breast cancer. It was discovered too late at stage IV and even though she had a mastectomy, she died about four years after the surgery. Now, cancer wants to have a piece of me! Besides the tumors in my thyroid, I discovered a couple of weeks ago that I have a lump in one of my breasts. Therefore, yesterday I had a diagnostic bilateral mammogram. I 'll find out the "verdict" next week or later.

In fact, I am kind of relieved. My health has been deteriorating for a few years and I have had to change doctors more times than I can remember because my previous doctors refused to give me referrals to specialists and/or perform the necessary tests to discard cancer. Their focus was on my diabetes and attributed all my symptoms to it. My new doctor actually took the time to sit down with me and listen to my symptoms and history. He agreed with me that I should be checked by specialists and referred me to a cardiologist, endocrinologist, neurologist, GI, ophthalmologist, and pulmunologist; after my complete blood count results came back.

At least for me, the most annoying part of feeling sick is not knowing what is causing the symptoms. I need to know my enemy to fight it well! Otherwise, I feel like I have my eyes covered and I am just swinging a sword blindly against an evasive but treacherous adversary. I've been so depressed feeling powerless and like just another number for my insurance and previous doctors, feeling ignored and unheard that I've had to take anti-depressants. After all, it's my body! I've lived with it all my life! I believe I know it better than anyone else.

I knew that my fatigue, fluctuation in weight, dizziness, migraine-like headaches, weakness, and the increasing intensity of widespread pain were not due to just the diabetes acting up because even when my sugar levels were OK, I still felt so very sick. I knew that something was quite wrong but, my previous doctors kept treating me as if I was an idiot or hypochondriac. I think that even my son began to doubt I was so sick and only believed me when it was obvious on my face. After all, if I was so sick, wouldn't the doctors refer me to specialists and prescribe me the right medicine? Well, no if you don't have the "right" type of insurance.

Anyway, all that is in the past now. I finally found a doctor who, so far, seems to care enough to listen and refer me to the right specialists to check me up. If he wouldn't have referred me to my endocrinologist, I would have never known (until, perhaps, it was too late) that I was walking around with two tumors in my neck! Now, I am ready for battle! It really makes a great difference when you are validated by a diagnosis and there is a name for the symptoms you have. Nevertheless, I am pretty sure that all my lumps will turn out benign but if they don't, I am ready! I am a survivor and will not go out without a good fight!
To be continued . . .

At The Grand Canyon

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 22:34:00 +0000

It is hard to deny the existence of a superior being/intelligence when one beholds the beauty and wonder of a natural creation like the Grand Canyon. It is no wonder that people from all over the world make it a favorite destination to visit while in the USA. Unfortunately, it seems to be human nature to take such wonders for granted when we live nearby.

My son and I have been living in AZ for many years and, although we always wanted to visit the Grand Canyon, we had never gotten around to do it. Fortunately, as Obama fans, when we heard that he was coming to the GC with his family for the weekend, we decided to take this opportunity to fulfill our dreams: visiting the GC and meeting the Obama family in person. We were not able to accomplish the latter since they were nowhere to be found when we were there but the wondrous beauty of the Grand Canyon and my own experience with that awesome squirrel more than made up for it.

Despite reading about the Grand Canyon and seeing movies and pictures, we had never really grasped the enormity of the place. It's huge! Indeed, nothing beats seeing such places in person. The park itself is amazing. There are several lodging cabins and RV parks for people to comfortably stay for long periods of time and have the chance to experience the whole of it. In fact, it's like a wild west town with shops, theater, and many activities that take you back to pioneers' time when such comforts did not exist. We did not get to go on the mule rides down the canyon or the 6-7 day boat exploration down the Colorado river. However, just visiting the museum which is right next to the canyon's rails made feel as if I were experiencing along the pioneers this amazing marvel!

Moreover, I was surprised to find out that Arizona certainly has plenty of beauty and greenery up North. The road trip to the Grand Canyon was like being in a dream. Miles of green forests and colorful rock mountains greeted us as we drove along the road from the Grand Canyon to beautiful Sedona. Sedona is well-known for its mysticism but the view left me in awe! I truly did not expect it to be so beautiful and enchanting. It is a quaint little town with freshness and mysticism in the air. My son and I decided to have dinner at a restaurant downtown and since it was still daylight, we sat outside contemplating the majestic and colorful rock mountains surrounding the town. I really did not want to leave. It must be awesome to wake up to such beauty everyday! The town itself is full of character and specially suited for those that seek to discover the mysteries of the universe and even their own fortune. It is definitely on my list of places to move to when the time is right for me to do so.

Anyway, I am sharing some pictures we took on the way and a couple we took in the town. Unfortunately, my battery in the BB was exhausted during the visit to the Grand Canyon so I was not able to take as many pictures as I wanted in town and surrounding areas. I'll do so next time and share them here with hope. In the meantime, I hope the ones I am posting today will be inspirational to you and your art.

Ms. Squirrel and Me at the Grand Canyon

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 20:14:00 +0000

At six o'clock in the morning on a beautiful summer day, my son Nick woke me up and rushed me to get ready. He announced with a big smile on his face, "we are going to the Grand Canyon, mom! Hopefully, we'll run into the first family!" I jumped in the shower still half asleep, washed my hair and quickly got dressed. Grabbed my cup of coffee (espresso) and checked to make sure that my doggies and kitties had enough food and water. Put my shoes on and away we went!

My son drove while I got to relax and listen to our favorite group, Disturbed. As we left the cemented and dusty roads of the city to encounter the greenery of the new landscape, I felt my spirit lifted. Nature and rural landscapes have a magical effect on me. It had been a long, long time since my son and I had hit the road and taken a trip together. Even though this was a rather short trip, it was a welcomed break from our routine and busy lives; a time to catch up.

We drove through beautiful rural scenery where wild animals run free and domesticated ones have plenty of space to play and explore. This was quite a contrast from what my loving dogs get in our city dwelling. There were lots of land and properties for sale so my son and I fantasized of getting a nice rural cottage someday where we could flee from the hustle and bustle of the city every weekend with our pets. Although it was not one of the extremely hot days so common in Arizona, we started to get thirsty as we approached the Flagstaff. We decided to stop at a gas station by the side of the road. While my son filled the car with gas and got us some water, I sat outside to watch people come and go while I smoked a cigarrette and enjoyed the rural air. People in the area were so different than those in the city. Everyone seemed to know each other and greeted one another as they got off their respective vehicles. It was refreshing! We must have stayed for about an hour there before we hit the road again on our way to the Grand Canyon.

After some driving around and getting a bit lost, we finally got to the Grand Canyon. It was the last day that people could enter without having to pay a fee. I guess that fact and the President's visit had compelled quite a few of people like us to visit the park. After we were able to find a parking space, we began walking around and enjoying the view. My son, who is a bit of a daredevil, insisted on getting as close as safely possible to the edge of the cliffs to admire the view. I stayed back once I realized that I got dizzy everytime I went closer to the edge. While waiting for him to finish his daring excursion, I got to strike a conversation with other onlookers that had decided to play it safe rather than sorry. As we were comparing notes about our young adult and teen children's ability to keep us worrying about them with their risk-taking tendencies, we spotted a squirrel that was happily going around on the rocks near where we were standing. He was busy taking care of his own business and did not seem to mind all these humans standing around and being noisy. One of the people I was with decided to give him some water but the squirrel would not come up to us to drink. I tried to take a picture of him whenever he showed himself. I managed to take just one good picture. After a while, he decided he's had enough and went off to whereever his burrow was.

My son came back and, after saying farewell to my new friends, we began walking again and taking pictures. After a while, I grew tired and we decided to stop to let me rest for a few minutes. I sat on a bench made of dead tree trunk and, as I was drinking my water, this cute, adult squirrel jumped onto my lap! Unfortunately, my son was looking at the canyon and we lost the chance of a great picture. Nevertheless, the squirrel decided I was safe to hang out with and after getting off my lap onto the bench, she put her two front paws on my right leg and just held that position quitely. She looked quite comfortable, I might say. Anyway, I decided to offer her some water and she happily grabbed on to my bottle and began to drink. I was ecstatic! I couldn't believe that this wonderful wild creature could be next to me so calmed and happily interacting with me. She even let me pet her! She stayed with me for a while, long enough for my son to pay attention to what was going on as some passerbys kept saying, "Look! The squirrel is by her side drinking from her bottle!" It was a "WOW" moment for everybody but specially for me. My son took some pictures while I kept enjoying my little friend's company. After a while, we decided it was time to start walking again and my little friend left. We went back to the same area where she befriended me and, lo and behold, she was on the rocks. Other people were around looking at her but she was ignoring them. I went over to her and, what do you know? She recognized me! She came over to me and we spent a bit more time together while the other people could not believe their eyes. Of course, I gave her some more water and after a while, we parted ways. Needless to say, this experience was the highlight of my visit to the Grand Canyon.

Afterwards, my son and I went around, visited the museum by one of the cliffs, drove around a bit more and decided it was time to hit the road again. I wanted to stop at Sedona on our way back. No, we did not get to see the first family as we did not get to see all of the Grand Canyon and go on trails by the Colorado river and other fun adventures awaiting visitors there. The place is so huge that to see it all and participate in activities and tours, one has to stay for at least a week there. In fact, the Grand Canyon Park is like a small town with a wild west flair. There are nice log cottages, RV parks, Theaters, Shopping areas including groceries, and a train takes visitors from one end to another. It's quite an experience. My son and I decided we'll do it again next year but this time we'll stay for more than just a few hours.

My next post will be about our visit to beautiful Sedona and the pictures we took on the way. Hope you enjoyed this account of our Grand Canyon adventure.

Inside The Fire - A Story of Suicide Devastation

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 15:58:00 +0000

A sense of hopelessness and helplessness creeps up your veins and seeing no way out you consider the worst outcome: suicide. As you contemplate this idea, you are so focused on your own pain and despair that you never stop to consider the effect that your decision will have on the lives of your loved ones, those you leave behind . . . I know, I've been there. Hold on to something or someone you love and spare him/her the pain and devastation of taking your own life.

I hope that after watching this powerful video based on a true story experienced by David Draiman, the vocalist of the amazing nu metal/rock group "Disturbed", you will realize that suicide should never be an option! In the video, David tells his story and his struggle to defeat the devil's temptation to kill himself too so he could be "in the fire with her." As most of you might know, when you lose someone is like you die with them, a part of you does, and it is hard to imagine moving on without that person in your life. Losing someone to suicide intensifies the void and devastation a thousandfold. Because, as long as you are alive, there is always hope; there is always a new dawn . . . You have the power and strength within you to defeat the demons of temptation and redefine your life! Hold on to hope and let it be your leader and cathartyst for your rebirth. Death is final and hopeless. You deserve a full life. Never give up!Like David, myself, and so many others have done, find your passion and pour your soul into it; let it be the fuel that compels you to remain alive.

Even if you don't feel you are important to someone, not even to yourself, the truth is that there is always someone who deeply cares about you (a friend, a lover, a child, a silent admirer, a pet) who will have to live for the rest of his or her life with the pain and devastation of your decision.

In truth, even if you don't believe in yourself, you are not less important than anyone else is in this world. You are special and, if you only take the time to give life a chance, you will realize that you are an indispensable link in the scheme of things . . . You are needed . . . alive! Arise and shout to the world and your demons, "I win!", I'm Alive!I'm Alive!

What Needs To Change To Improve USA's Educational System

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 20:43:00 +0000

A few days ago, some friends and I got into an interesting conversation regarding the status of this country's educational system. Since I had the privilege to be educated in another country for my entire elementary and high school years, I feel I am in a position to provide some insight to what is lacking in this system.

Although many other variables might be part of the problem, I believe that the issue lies predominantly on the lack of a solid education in multiple areas. In most other countries, like Japan and Latin America, children are taught from the beginning in all disciplines: Science, humanities, languages, arts, and math. All these fundamental subjects are mandatory, not elective as it is the case here in USA.

By being exposed to different disciplines throughout their school years, children develop a scholarly mindset that allows them to better participate in their society and the global community. Included in the curriculum is the development of a strong sense of civic duty. In most countries, voting and participating in local politics comes natural for teens and young adults. A comprehensive education gives them the ability and motivation to actively take part in shaping their country's future. Having a well-rounded education is embedded in their national pride.

Therefore, I believe that our children here in the US are being deprived of the opportunity to thrive by having fundamental subjects like chemistry, biology, math (algebra, trigonometry, geometry), physics, philosophy, economy, history, sociology, among others as electives. The only electives most children have in other countries are a second language and a specific sport. If we hope to create a better cultural and educational legacy for our children in today's world, our educational system should adopt the educational policy that has been proven successful in other countries. This would certainly prepare our children better to excel in this competitive world.

Why Some DV Shelters Need To Reconsider Their Policies

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 20:40:00 +0000

As a former resident in many DV shelters across the USA and, a former staff member, it has become easy to assess why some shelters' success rate is very low. Furthermore, through listening to other residents and sharing our mutual concerns, I have come to the conclusion that the policies in effect in most DV shelters are unsuitable for DV survivors.

I believe that the originators of DV shelters had the best of intentions and just by setting up facilities for women and children to seek haven from the abuser/batterer, they have made a great contribution to developing awareness and better understanding of domestic violence. However, as pioneers, they lacked an appropriate model to follow so they designed their system based on the only shelters available at the time: homeless shelters.

Nevertheless, many years have gone by since the inception of DV shelters and much has been learnt about the particular issues affecting this specific social group. Yet, most DV shelters are still following the old model and, some, have even added characteristics that emulate correctional facilities. In doing so, they "inadvertendly" keep victimizing DV survivors and contributing to the "blaming the victim" mentality. Thus, rendering their system ineffective.

DV survivors are not criminals/inmates.

They are not responsible for the abuse. It is their abuser/batterer the one that has made a choice to resort to tyranny and victimization.

DV survivors are not the problem; the abuser/batterer is.

DV survivors deserve to be heard and treated with dignity and respect regardless of their shortcomings.

DV survivors are not inepts or stupid. They've managed to survive, haven't they?

Not all DV survivors are mentally ill, alcoholics, or drug addicts.

DV survivors do not need to be treated like children and/or in a condescending way. Their abuser did that to them for years.

DV survivors need to be part of the solution and regain control over their lives and choices.

The current status quo regarding DV survivors vs. abusers/batterers is one of punishment. Our system and society expects DV survivors to be the ones to turn their life around, abandon everything, live in shelters, give up most of their rights and freedom, instead of the abuser/batterer. In doing so, we are punishing the victims. These expectations are so outrageous that they are equivalent to putting rape victims in jail or prison while letting the rapist run rampant in our communities.

The Core Of Our Humanity

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Tue, 30 Jan 2007 10:56:00 +0000

It's been a while since I've done some writing on this blog. A new year has begun and with it new hopes for many, new directions for some.

Today, I want to share my thoughts about hope and its role in our lives and existence. I was walking back home from one of the local stores a day or so ago when I found myself pondering on the fundamental importance of hope, if not faith, in a person's life. Without hope, we die either literally by our own hands or figuratively within. Hope gives us something to look forward to, it gives us strength to overcome the hurdles and misfortunes in our lives and keep moving forward, even against all odds. Although some might disagree with the following, I think that hope and faith are identical twins; the main difference between both is that believers and atheists have hope for change, for improvement from within and without. Faith and beliefs, on the other hand, focus our hope on a greater being than us to redeem us, provide for us, and save us. Regardless, if we had neither, how could we go on? What would we have to look forward to?

Therefore, those who claim that our beliefs, hopes, and faith define us individually and collectively seem to have gotten the point a long time ago. Because of this, it is clear that we must all strive to respect and honor each other's beliefs, hopes, and faith even if we do not share them a bit. These are at the core of our humanity.

Happy New Year 2007!

Brain Injured, not brain dead!

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Fri, 25 Mar 2005 12:17:00 +0000

I am outraged at the inhumane treatment Terri Schiavo has been getting from the courts in our "godly" country. I have worked with brain-injured individuals in the past and can attest to their humanity and spirit. As I watched Terri's images on TV, I could see that she is very much alive and sentient. Yet, the courts have chosen to let her die a most horrendous death: dehydration and starvation. How can anyone justify such torture? We treat our death row criminals and pets with more compassion and dignity than the courts are offering to Terri. There is no indication that Terri would have chosen to die in such a way, would you? Surely, if Terri would have known the type of death her husband and the courts would impose on her - slow, painful, agonizing torture as her body dries out and the hunger pain tears her inside while she is unable to make her voice heard as she cries, "Stop! Stop! I am hurting!" - she would have never told anyone that she would rather die than live this way. Certainly, when and if she said that she would rather die than be a burden to her loved ones, she did not have this kind of torture in mind. She was probably thinking along the lines that most of us think when we make such statement: a swift, painless death; a humane and compassionate one. I doubt that anyone would choose to die in a slow and painful way. In fact, when she was told that she was going to be starved to death, she tried to utter the words, "I want to live!"

Furthermore, amongst all this controversy, our courts and politicians have failed to take into account the fact that her husband has much to gain by her death and that by denying her parents' request, our system is condoning the actions of an abusive spouse. Obviously, her husband is using the system to abuse Terri by subjecting her to such torture. In fact, he has been abusing her for years (I urge you to read Terri Schiavo's Full Story and find out how "loving and caring" her husband has been since she became injured). Moreover, her death would free him from further financial burden now that he has exhausted the nearly 2 million dollars settlement he got in 1992 when he sued her physician for not treating her potassium imbalance that allegedly caused her cardiac arrest. Interestingly enough, he never mentioned during the mal-practice trial or prior to it his wife's wishes to die. It wasn't until he got the settlement that he began to claim that his wife would not like to be kept alive under these conditions and, instead of using the money for her care and treatment, he embarked on a prolongued legal battle against Terri's parents to get the courts to side with him in terminating Terri's life. The courts refused several times to consider expert evidence and testimony that Terri's parents presented to prevent such atrocity and ruled in favor of Schiavo's claim based only on his word and the testimony of his brother and his brother's wife's. Thus, ignoring Terri's family and her best friend's claim that she had expressed wishes to the contrary.

Furthermore, last November WorldNetDaily reported that her parents tried to terminate her husband's guardianship because there is compelling medical evidence pointing at him as the one who caused her current state. The report stated, "there is compelling medical evidence suggesting Schiavo may have assaulted his wife and perhaps attempted to strangle her. When this was discovered through scanning Terri's early medical records, attorney Pat Anderson, who represents the parents, filed an emergency motion to have him removed as guardian. Schiavo's attorney, George Felos, promptly slammed the motion as "garbage" and characterized it as being "rife with unattributed hearsay, rank innuendo and libel."

As a society, we must call for a full investigation of the circumstances that caused Terri's brain injury and demand that the courts restore her feeding tube until that investigation yields results. It is appalling to realize that the courts can choose to ignore "reasonable doubt" of foul play and condemn an innocent human being to such a torturing death on the word of a suspect. Repeatedly, the courts have refused to consider evidence from world-renowned neurologists that Terri is not in a Permanent Vegetative State (PVS) and, with proper therapy and treatment she could make some progress, including regain her speech and walk again. These doctors have actually visited and evaluated her. Hence, the courts, especially judge Greer, have based their decisions without considering the overwhelming evidence and expert evaluation of her condition pointing to a more positive outcome. Furthermore, there is clearly spousal abuse. Her husband's attitude and behavior regarding her basic human rights and medical treatment clearly show that he has been abusing and neglecting her since at least 1993. Therefore, Terri's husband might just get away with murder with the blessings of the courts.

Ultimately, this case is not just about the right to live or die but about our moral fabric as we allow our judicial system to deny Terri's parents their right to look after the well-being of their daughter and ensure her right to live and die with compassion and dignity.

A Child's Plight

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Tue, 08 Feb 2005 09:46:00 +0000

by Barbara Hidalgo
Copyright 1991-2005

In the streets of Bogota, a child - named Simon* - wanders amidst the crowd. He is a lonely soul, lost in the multitude, forgotten by humanity, rejected by his society.

He looks like any other child. His eyes are full of dreams and hope. Yet, at the tender age of 10, he knows of hunger and distress. He knows of violence, terror and cold, but most of all . . . he knows of loneliness.

He is "nobody" to many, and only "someone" to himself. He has no parents to protect him. He has no home to shelter him. He has no place to belong.

As he walks down the busy streets, his hopeful eyes look for a place to sleep tonight. Will it be that corner? or Will it be that bench? Perhaps, it will be a lonely alley, as lonely as himself. He knows sooner or later he'll find the right place, where he might sleep safely in company of his street friends. If he could only ignore the stomach cramps tearing his inside! What he found in the trash just wasn't enough!

His little mind reminds him of his fellows in the streets. Six of them were lately found shot to death in a ditch. Will he end up like them or will he someday find that kind, caring hand that might save his life? If only there were someone to turn to, someone daring enough to care about children who, just like him, are innocent victims of human cruelty and pride. They are children their social system has forgotten, leaving them stranded to their own tragic fate . . .

"But, enough of this reality!" - he murmurs to himself. Another night has come. He gathers with other homeless kids who - like him - are children of the streets. They are the closest to a family he has ever had; the only human warmth he has ever known. They all share the same fears, the same dreams and pain. Rejection and neglect from those entrusted with their care brought them together and forced them to survive on their own. They try to keep warm and soothe their hunger pangs by sniffing toxic fumes from some type of imported glue. Every sniff kills a cell in their tender, yet still growing brain. Together, they will try to keep awake until exhaustion forces them to doze off. They go to sleep praying, asking the night to shelter them from the big man and his gun. It is just all part of their struggle, their struggle to survive. For, although they are nobody to most, they are someone to themselves. They have no where to turn . . .

Soon exhaustion takes it toll. Simon lays his little body on the cold cemented pavement and promptly begins to dream. In his dreams he escapes to another world, a different reality where he no longer wanders lonely in the streets. He dreams of a hot homemade meal he shares with loving parents. They keep him safe and make him feel complete. A mother and a father who care! What would it be like to have them in his life? What would his life be like if he had people who care about him?

In the streets of Bogota a small child has died tonight. His friends called him Simon. While he was dreaming of loving parents and a safe home, the big man came. Hidden by the dark and with no hesitation, he took this little boy's life with the cold metallic sound of his merciless firing gun. He threw the boy's body into the nearest dumpster. Thus, reflecting how most people in his society perceive the life of little boys like him to be worth. He dreams no more. He no longer seeks that loving, caring hand reaching out for him; the only hope he had for a fair chance in life .

As we go to sleep tonight, another child will lie down on that same spot other homeless children before him had until they ended up with a bullet in their heart. This child will also dream the same old dreams they all shared. He will shelter that same hope; trying to forget his life's daily nightmare.
In the streets of Bogota, a child will silently cry himself to sleep tonight wishing that people like you and me could bring hope into his life.

Author's Note:

Although most homeless children worldwide do not suffer the same fate, they too have to face many dangers trying to survive in the streets. You can make the difference in a homeless child's life now, especially Tsunami orphans in Asia, by making him/her a "someone" in your life. Get in touch with your local community action centers, the red cross or, homeless shelters and "adopt" a child, officially or figuratively. Don't just give money! Get involved in that child's life, mentor him or her, let the child know through your loving care and concern that he or she is a "somebody" to many. Don't just "remember" these children for the holidays; they need our tender-loving care year around. No child in the world should be all alone to face life. Children are our world's greatest treasure and hope.

*Simon is a factual-based fictional child inspired by a 1991 World Vision documentary about the fate of homeless children in Bogota, Colombia, at the time. The children's plight deeply moved me and led me to write this piece I now share with you.

Father

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Thu, 27 Jan 2005 20:53:00 +0000

By Soulful-Writer
Copyright 2005

I just learned that you died
in 2001.
To me,
you've been dead
all of my life.

Yet, somehow,
a touch of sadness
overcomes me.
I don't know why.

You were never there for me,
not even when my mother died.
I needed you so,
too many times while growing up,
as I experienced life . . .

You chose to be absent,
you chose to forget,
and went about your life
as if I never was.

I often wondered
why you didn't love me,
what did I ever do
for you to reject me so?

I was your only daughter,
the one you'd claimed to want;
was my mother wrong
to bring me into life?

I guess you never knew
how your desdain hurt my soul,
not that you'd have cared . . .

I grew up wanting and hating you,
all at the same time.
I looked for you
in the arms of other men
but,
I could never find you . . .

And, so, I had to learn
to live with the void
that your rejection left me.

What did you say to God
when your day of judgment came?
How did you justify
being a father to your sons
while leaving me
devoid of
your protection and love?

How did you justify
letting me grow up
with the pain of your rejection,
my own flesh and blood?

I hope that God forgave you
for I don't know if I have.
I only feel the emptiness
lodged in my inside.

Copyright 2005 SoulfulWriter

A Path To Happiness

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Sat, 15 Jan 2005 02:36:00 +0000

By Soulful-Writer
Copyright 1994-2005

Hear the call
in your heart.

Follow the way
your spirit leads you.

Don't give in
to the ways of the world . . .

Be true to yourself
even when others around you
Don't understand or approve.

Recognize and use your talents wisely.

Don't misuse your uniqueness or,
waste your special gifts.

You are not less important
than anyone else in this world is.

Everyone has a unique part to play.

You are special.

Your part is vital in the scheme of life.

Always remember that
whatever you do, good or bad,
will certainly
come back to you
a thousand fold.

Do what you know in your heart
to be right,
understanding
that you are an irreplaceable
link
in the big chain of events.

Discover the purpose
behind the situations
and events in your life,

Your role, your lessons . . .

Everything,
whether it brings you
joy or sorrow,
is an opportunity
for your growth.

Learn to discover how
everything in your life
is linked
in the scheme of things.

Realize that
we are all part of
The Whole.

Appreciate the big picture
to which your life belongs.

Believe in yourself and God,
whatever your concept of
Him might be.

He will provide you with
the inner strength and means
to accomplish your goals and
to overcome
the challenges along your path.

You must follow
the call within you or,
you will never
find peace and happiness
in this life.

Only then,
you will be able to spread
your wings and fly,

Truly free to meet your destiny . . .

The Choices We Make

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Sat, 15 Jan 2005 02:31:00 +0000

By Soulful-Writer
Copyright 2002 - 2005

Socrates once said, “An unexamined life is a wasted life.” I used to think that having regrets was a sign of weakness or failure. However, as time goes by and I come closer to my golden years, invited or not, memories pop in my mind forcing me to face the choices I have made at certain points in my life. Regrets? Yes, I have a few; especially when my choices have affected to some degree other people’s life.

For, whether I like it or not, my choices in life have had some effect on the quality of life and experiences of those who have crossed my way or, shared my journey at some point. I have not always been sensitive, compassionate or, wise enough to make a positive difference in some of my companions’ life. That, I regret. For memories of who we are and the role we played when interacting with others are all we truly leave behind for them to cherish or despise when we are gone. Material legacies are ephemeral. Memories and the mark we leave behind live on in the heart and mind of those we came to know.

History tends to repeat itself, perhaps not with the same players but in essence. Like history, regrets help me measure where I am at this point in my life, what lessons I have learned in this voyage; how much I have changed or remained the same. My regrets serve as reference of the mistakes I made in the past so I may have the insight to mend them - if possible – in the present or, to avoid making them as I encounter similar situations with different people in the remainder of my life.

A Path To Peace

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Sat, 08 Jan 2005 13:12:00 +0000

By Soulful-Writer
Copyright 2003-2005

The root of discord and violence between people and nations comes from our tendency to forget our humanity. We "forget" our true nature.

Violence is a "learned" behavior. We "learn" it from our environment. When we are born, we do not possess the tendency to violence. As we grow, we become driven by "reactions". Our reactions are influenced by what we witness in our environment. We "copy" what we see. Therefore, violence and hatred are not natural to our essence.

As we grow older, we "buy" into the deception. We come to believe that violence is "OK" when "justified". It is "OK" to kill for our beliefs or defending our "territory." We have learned to "possess." We "live to possess". We like to possess things, people, land, animals, anything tangible and intangible. The more we possess, the more powerful over others we feel. Our society or community reinforces this “tendency”. Our worth is largely "measured" by the amount of our possessions. We feel validated. Thus, around the world we find ourselves fighting, killing each other "defending" what we "possess": our nationalism, religion, territory, and ideologies. We become slaves of our deception and desires. In the process, we lose ourselves, our humanity. We sacrifice our soul for lies! (How much better off we would be if we were to place as much zest pursuing wisdom, our self-growth or spiritual evolution as we place chasing our illusions and enhancing our bodies!)

Thus, driven by our illusions, we forget that those we attack blindly (other human beings of all ages) in the name of "a cause, belief or ideology" are as real as we are. They bleed, they grieve, they have potential and dreams just like us. In sum, in many ways, they are extensions of our "selves" with their own uniqueness and role to play in this world. We deceive ourselves into thinking of them as our "enemy", faceless, without history and soul, different from us. We label them, "Jews", "Palestinians", "Blacks", "Whites", "Muslims", "Christians", "Infidels" and so on.

Some of the stupidity of it all is that we condemn one another mostly for traits beyond the individual's control. We choose to ignore that we are born into a specific religion, ethnicity, country, race, gender, social or economic status! I am white only because I was born into the white race. Or, I am black because I was born into the black race. The same goes for my gender, national origin, and even religion! (Although the latter has become "optional", another "power-driven" concept). However, before we are any of the above, we are human beings. Take all of the above away. What do you have? Human beings! That is what each and every one of us is first and foremost. That is the truth! Everything else is an illusion, a lie!!!! What would happen if we were to eliminate the labels and see each other for what we really are: people?

I firmly believe that peace in the Middle East or anywhere else will never come as a result of political and religious "agreements" and strategies. Peace, I believe, can only be achieved from the "awakening to our humanity" by each and every individual, ordinary people, "caught in the middle" of the political and religious games and conflicts.

Peace can only be achieved by rejecting the illusion, the lie! By opponents getting together and taking off the blinders through sharing their humanity, their pain, their hopes and dreams, by learning from one another, comforting each other, crying and laughing together, forgiving one another, working together and making the decision to stop violence. Thus, honoring the memory of those who have died in the fight by deciding to relate and interact as human beings first and foremost, not "puppets" or "labels."

Some Israelis and Palestinians are doing just that. They are meeting each other, as human beings and sharing the pain each one has endured by the loss of loved ones in the conflict; forgiving each other. They have stopped seeing each other as enemies, as a "Palestinian" and a "Jew". Instead, they have broken free from the deception and have achieved wisdom and enlightenment realizing that first and foremost, they are human beings. Letting their humanity and compassion prevail! Your pain is not greater than my pain. Your loss is not greater than mine. Your life is not more significant than mine and vice versa . . .

Violence only begets more violence just like hatred only breeds more hatred. It becomes a vicious cycle. It de-humanizes us. It causes us to lose our essence, corrupting our spirit, destroying our soul and everyone and everything around us! Violence and hatred, the deceptive "labeling and blindness" make us dead among the living. Every time we kill someone (or, condone violence) whether our target is a child or an adult, we kill ourselves, our humanity more and more. We bring pain and suffering to everyone who loved and cherished the life we took. Shame and despair to those who love and cherish us. We become "disconnected" from our essence and blind to the fact that, whether we like it or not, we are all part of the whole, of a bigger picture. Just like each cell and organ in our body makes up our physical being, each one of us is an essential component of life. Just like each drop of water is part of the ocean, so are we part of the whole. As the great poet-philosopher John Donne once said, "No man is an island." No one is "dispensable" . . . We are all indispensable! We were not born to be killing each other but to bring forth more life and safeguard its sanctity. Everything else, all our "excuses" and so-called "justification" for killing are deception.

Until each and every human being on earth understands that by harming others we are betraying ourselves and purpose, slapping our Creator on the face, annihilating our own, destroying our "selves" and what makes us "special", "privileged" among other life forms, we will never have peace on earth.

I challenge you to experience your humanity for one day. Relate to everyone you encounter without any labels! See each individual as a human being only. Can you do it? Come back and tell us about your experience and how it felt for you.

Shattered Innocence

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Sat, 08 Jan 2005 11:21:00 +0000

By Soulful-Writer
Copyright 2001-2005

She was born innocent like the gentle morning dew that caresses the gardens of the Taj Mahal.

Her mother, a child herself, like many other young females, was kidnapped or lured from her village to become a prisoner of a man’s greed and disdain for human life. She is powerless to protect her daughter from following her fate. She serves the lust of many men who come to her door for a price. Fleeing is not an option. Her captor keeps his “merchandise” tightly secured under chained and locked metallic sliding doors and bars on the only window that brings some light into their world.

Now, Pavithra has joined this circle of hopelessness, vice, and despair. Like many of the other children born to women forced into prostitution by an insensitive world, she will quietly sleep on a mat placed carelessly on the floor while her mother performs her duties to keep them alive. That is the only world she will ever know. Her turn will soon come, even before she has had a chance to be a child.

They are victims of “white slavery,” kidnapped women sold to brothels to satiate men’s sexual needs and fill their pimp’s pockets with their woe and shame. Their situation has reduced their status to that of “goods,” “objects,” “merchandise.” They are no longer human beings deserving of compassion and protection from their captor’s greed and brutality. The local police stand impervious to their suffering and look the other way for a share. They are destined to live and die as sexual toys because the voices of a few that cry and urge for their release, bounce off barriers of police and social indifference.

Sadly, their tragedy repeats itself in the story of so many other women from Third World countries, even here in America, the land of the free and strong. Chinese women in New York City brought into this country under false pretenses; bear witness and testimonial to this, the highest form of cruelty and abuse. American women are not immune to this tragedy. Television networks have reported in various occasions the story of American women who were misled to move to a foreign country and became unwilling “members” of this ring. Others have been subjected to the same fate right here in their own homeland. Foreign television shows broadcast their situation as just another report on the human condition here and afar. Some viewers watch in horror while others brush it off. However, what are we, as individuals, doing to halt and prevent it? The strongest chain begins with just one link.

Those who care wonder: What can we do to help them? How can we stop their misery when not even their own government would do anything to end it?
Such is the challenge life presents before us. We can either tell ourselves that we are too far away and powerless to help them and move on with our lives, or we can join forces with those souls who dare to fight back. How do we do it? With the advent of modern technology and the Internet, human affairs in any part of the world have become global issues. These modern means have brought into our life the tools we need to empower us to make a difference in the world. Let’s not use them just for our own personal gains but for a greater purpose: to raise our voice against abuse and injustices happening to human beings here and across the globe.

Using all tools available to us, we must leave our passive stand and actively join the chain of others making a difference against inhuman acts. We start by contacting the one International Organization that holds much power on the affairs taking place in various part of the world: The United Nations. We write to their leaders demanding sanctions imposed to those governments that remain impervious to these women’s tragedy. We cry out for justice not once or twice, but as many times and as often as we must to get the results we seek. In the comfort of our world and “water cooler” chats, we make others aware and invite them to spread the word and join our cause.

Some of you might be wondering why should I even care about what is happening to women in other places of the world? Because, dear reader, life has a way of recoiling issues we dismiss right back into our life in one-way or another. You never know the turns your daughter’s or sister’s life might take! What you might think today is happening too far for you to be concerned, might indeed be unfolding in your own back yard! After all, what does happen to those missing women and children who are never found? Furthermore, Isn’t one of the greatest traits that makes us human caring for the misfortune of others? You have the power to prevent another child from becoming a sexual slave here and abroad. Act now!

Solitude

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Sat, 08 Jan 2005 10:11:00 +0000

By Soulful-Writer
Copuright 2000-2005

Solitude, despair,
Is finding yourself
Facing the world alone;
with no one to turn,
No hand to reach for
in times of woe.

When the money you make
Is never enough
To make ends meet
as you try to survive.

When you wonder hopelessly
How to pay your rent while
trying to soothe your hunger’s pain.

Hopelessness, despair,
Is struggling daily
To keep your head afloat
Despite your useless efforts
To survive on your own.

Hiding from knocks on your door,
Your heart leaps in fright,
Whoever it is
Does not bring any tips.

Your body aches,
You feel like you are dying,
Can’t bear the stress
Of living like this.

You desperately seek
Ways to improve your income,
Yet, everything requires you
to have money to start.
Is there any hope in sight?

Censorship In The Arts

noreply@blogger.com (Soulful-Writer) — Sun, 02 Jan 2005 04:16:00 +0000

The subject of censhorship in the arts is a very important topic for us
artists because it affects the scope of our artistic expression as it
relates to world events. A classic example is the case of the brilliant
and always controversial poet Amiri Baraka who, in 2002, was stripped
of his Poet Laureates title in New Jersey because of his poem
"Somebody Blew Up America."

In an interview with New Letters editor Robert Stewart, Baraka
addresses the responsibility of poets in society:

"The poet has to be engaged in society. You cannot transform society
from the outside ... you have to be willing to be in the middle of it
- in it - and struggling to change it."

For those of you who have not read the poem, you may do so at
http://www.counterpunch.org/poem1003.html

After you've read it, I invite you to join our Google group and
participate in a polemic discussion regarding the consequences that
this poem had on the poet's title and how it affects the rest of us.
Should he had been stripped of his title because of it? What does this
action say about our freedom of speech and expression? Should we only
honor those artists that write or create non-controversial statements
in their work? What are the limits of our democracy when it comes to
artistic expression? How does this event affect your artistic freedom?
Should artists stay away from political and/or religious commentary?
What is the role of our art in society?