Skeezix's Scratching Post

The Most Terrifying Halloween Movie EVER!!

noreply@blogger.com (Karen Nichols) — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 20:13:00 +0000

I am not...

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Fri, 03 Jun 2011 04:04:00 +0000

Cymotrichous.

MEET ME AT MOUSEBREATH!

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Thu, 19 May 2011 06:40:00 +0000

If yer wundering whut I've been up to and yer wundering why I'm not posting heer, it's becuz after Catster dumped me and unceremoniussly kikt me to the kerb, I wint to werk for mousebreath! Mousebreath! is the ferst online lifestyle magazine by cats for cats and kittens and cat lovers.

Becuz of the long hours werking at mousebreath, I won't be able to rite on my own blog for a wile. So pleeze bookmark mousebreath!and vizit me thare evry day.

Yer frend,
Skeezix

Me an da Qween

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Thu, 19 May 2011 06:25:00 +0000

Today, Qween Elizubeth went to the place ware they make Mother's Milk, and stood in the EXACT SAME PLACE as me win I was thare! Ixsept she made the foe paw of not drinking the Mother's Milk. That part has me confyoozed. Why wood she tern down the NEKTER OF THE HEVENS?????

Heer is da qween:

And here I am at the spot on the bar that she wuz facing:

I gess I'm just a magnet for qweens, huh?

(Thank yoo, Derby and Ducky, for the heds up!)

Da Wedding!

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Tue, 03 May 2011 10:01:00 +0000

Well, frends, it's been qwite a week! I'm still processing all the fotos frum the wedding pawties that I got to attend, and me and my pal Flat Tyler still have to sqweeze in sum siteseeing and shopping. I wunt to be a Sloane Ranger just like my idol da byootiful Princess Diana.

Heer is me and my flat buddy Tyler, and our other frends Maxwell and Eli. We did a pajama pawty before the wedding. It was fun, but win we tride to put pink spunge rollers in my hare, it didn't werk. My hares are too short. But otherwize it wuz fun.

As you may or mayn't know, I was unable to skore an invitayshun to the Royal Wedding. But I wuz in good cumpany cuz Tony Blare and da Prez of the USA did not git invited either.

So insted of sitting in a stuffy cherch without a good view of anything (cuz I'm short, you know), I got invited by my grate frend Freya to attend sum street pawties. The pikchers up above are of that. Freya was a purrfect hostess and made shur I got lots and lots of that scrumshus British food. And we got to see closeups of evrything on the telly (that's TV for my Amerikun frends), wich is better than what we wood have seen in the stuffy cherch.

At first, it looked like the wedding wood be rained out. But then the sun came out and it was a byootiful day! I even put a little sunblok on my nose and ears.

Anyway, my eyes leaked a little when da byootiful bride wint down the isle. And when they kissed!!! It was just like a fairy tale with a happy ending.

More pikchers are coming! And maybe I'll do a fashun report to, cuz I think I'll wet my pants if I don't git to dish abowt Eugenie and Beatrice's hats and frumpy owtfits. I wuz a little disappointed that my idol Sir Elton John was NOT waring outrayjuss glasses.

Hey, yoo need to check out my new endever. It's an online cat lifestyle magazeen called mousebreath! It's at mousebreath.com. That's ware yoo'll find me these days insted of at The Cat's Meow. Win I'm not globetrotting. It is taking all of my energy these days, so hed on over!

THANK YOO FREYA!!!!!

Gess ware I'm going???

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Mon, 18 Apr 2011 05:38:00 +0000

Can anybuddy gess ware I'm hedded? Here's a hint: It's the last name of one of the pare of fashion expurrts who I idolize.

Vishus Deer Alert

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Sat, 09 Apr 2011 05:55:00 +0000

WARNING!!!! As yoo can planely see, this vishus deer is hanging out by a big berd becuz he noze that big fat joosy cats like Tripper like to make berds go ded. So all he has to do is wate for a big fat KLOOLESS joosy cat like Tripper to come along and BAM!

Well, yoo know the rest. I don't wunt to git groosume!

AND BE CAREFUL MEEZERS AND BILLY! This deer livs by yoo!!!!!

Sorry I haven't bin blogging

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Fri, 08 Apr 2011 06:55:00 +0000

I wunted to apologize to evrywun for not blogging more on my Scratching Post. Things have bin hot and hevvy over at The Cat's Meow, wich has reqwired a lot of my attenshun.And the Food Lady has NOT gotten my Easter owtfit yet. And I have NOT fownd anybuddy in the UK to take Flat Skeezix and Flat Tyler to Lundun during the Royal Wedding. So I've been deeling with a lot of poop!

All I can say is, pleeeeze bookmark CatsMeowBlog.com.

Oh, and don't furget to vote for my speshul frend Daisy for the Best Blog Award. Just klik that orangey yellow badge at the top of the right columm.

Pleeze Help My Food Lady be the Purina Cat Chow Correspondent

noreply@blogger.com (Karen Nichols) — Sat, 26 Mar 2011 22:55:00 +0000

As yoo may or mayn't know, my Food Lady is trying to git hired as the ferst Purina Cat Chow correspondent. So to help, I made a video to send to Purina to git her hired.

YOO CAN HELP! Click heer to go to the site on Facebook, post a link to the video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eqnp0zpUq7U).Then tell them why they shood hire the FL (applicant #4492).

Also, pleeze cross-post on FB and Twitter.

And watch the moovey I made.

thank yoo,

yer frend,

Skeezix the Cat

Moe the Geezer Meezer about to Git the Axe in Kill Shelter in LA

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Thu, 24 Mar 2011 18:27:00 +0000

My hart got broked the morning win I red abowt Moe the Geezer Meezer. Moe got dropped off at a kill shelter cuz he is "too old." Sweet Moe is only 12 yeers old.

Moe can be saved if he can git a foster home (in LA area) and $300 for his medikul ixpenses. Yoo can donate below or click here if yoo can foster Moe.

12 YEAR OLD POLYDACTYL SEAL POINT/SNOWSHOE SWEET SIAMESE "MOE" NEEDS OUT TODAY!!!!!

Sweet Moe was turned into the shelter on March 8th by his owners because he was too old.

Like most cats there, he has come down with URI and I have been given 5 hours notice to get him out.

We need a FOSTER and DONATIONS – at least $300 for his vetting , senior blood panel and pull.

PLEASE NETWORK HIM!!!!!!! HE is a DOLL and a VOLUNTEER FAVORITE!!! He also has extra toes in the front of his feet!!!!

Chip-In for Donations: http://carsoncats.chipin.com/moe

I'm gitting as good as Libberachey!

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Tue, 22 Mar 2011 21:16:00 +0000

Mr TF is teeching me how to play the piano. I thot it wood be good cuz 2 of my gratest iduls are Libberachey and Elton John. So sinse I'm always looking to bild my skillset, I'm adding piano virchewoso to the list.

Now, don't feel bad if yoo can't play as well as this. I went threw many minits of trayning to git this good. Next I'm gonna try to git Mr TF to teech me sum show toonz. I just love show toonz.

My Exsiting Weekend

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Mon, 21 Mar 2011 23:02:00 +0000

I had the most exciting weekend of my hole entire life on Saturday. Me an the Food Lady wint on a casting call for the Purina Cat Chow Correspondent, wich is a job I think I wood be good at.

The casting call was held at a Petsmart wich is a ginormous store full of pet stuffs. They had vary VARY fansy bathrooms thare that gave yoo a lot of privasy. I like my privasy. And it was a vary long car ride, so yoo know, I had to GO!:

Wile we were wating in line, I checked out the bedroom sekshun. I saw a bed that kind of gave me urjes thinking of kerling up with my speshul frend Daisy in it. It was pink with a pink bow and it was vary fansy. As yoo know, my speshul frend Daisy likes fansy.

After we purrformed fur the camra, the FL took me to see the All Yoo Can Eet Buffay at Petsmart. This part of the All Yoo Can Eet Buffay had all yoo can eet berds. But they came with fevvers on and they were lowd. Not nice and qwiet with gravy like yoo git in the Fansy Feest can:

So we wint over to the All Yoo Can Eet See Food Buffay. They had byootiful fishes with many colors. But yoo'd have to git yer paws wet, wich as yoo know, I HATE doing.
Thare was lots of bloo, just like on the Fansy Feest Shrimp and See Food can, but the fishes looked diffrint than whut comes in the can. They were pritty. I cood have watched them all day.

These berds was bilding nests! It was fasinayting!

Mr TF was thare with us. He told the FL that if she made him her speshul majik pancakes that he'd come along. Heer I am higher than Mr TF!!! I'm on top of the werld's tallest cat tree!I had a vary good time at the Petsmart and made lots of new frends. Yoo shood git yer peeple to take yoo to Petsmart. It's fun!

And afterwerd, we got to go to Mikdonulds, cuz the FL sed the koffey was kikking in. I had to stay in the car with Mr TF for that. Cuz yoo DEFINTLY don't wunt to be with the FL win the koffey kiks in!

Happy St Patrick's Day!

noreply@blogger.com (Karen Nichols) — Thu, 17 Mar 2011 09:36:00 +0000

Green beer fur evrybuddy!*

_______________________________
* Except Tripper. Cuz he's a krazy drunk and tries to eat me.

FREE KIBBLE FOR JAPAN CATS!

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Wed, 16 Mar 2011 07:05:00 +0000

Today's gest riter is the Food Lady, hoo has asked me to spred the werd asking evrybuddy to go over to FreeKibbleKat and answer the daily trivia qweschun:

Today (16 March), 100% of the kibble that FreeKibble.com and FreeKibbleKat.com raise will go to earthquake and tsunami relief efforts in Japan. Their goal is to raise over 10,000 meals in one day for the effort. If they reach 1 million pieces of kibble today, Halo for Pets will match the donation. And it won't cost you a cent.

HOW IT WORKS

Go to FreeKibbleKat.com or FreeKibble.com and answer the day's trivia question. And you're done. Yep! That's all it takes. At no cost to you, you've just donated ten pieces of kibble.

I recommend dropping by every day. The trivia question is always fun, and over the course of a year, you will have donated 3650 pieces of kibble -- at no cost to you!

ABOUT FREEKIBBLE.COM

Since FreeKibble was started by teenager Mimi Ausland in 2008, FreeKibble has donated almost 350 TONS of kibble to animal shelters across the country. (Click here to view totals.)

Mimi was elected the ASPCA Kid of the Year in 2008. She's been profiled in Cat Fancy Magazine, on the NBC Nightly News, and People Magazine. She's also been a guest on the Ellen Degeneres show.

But why are you still reading this? Click here to donate your free kibble.

Win Yer Own Custom Flat Cat!

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Tue, 15 Mar 2011 20:08:00 +0000

OK. So I haven't bin arownd much cuz Sarge Charlie and Ant Bee took me on anuther kruze with them, and boy, Sarge Charlie is a pawty animal!

Sarge Charlie interdoosed me and Flat Jeter to da grate John Heald. Ant Bee was so excited she cood hardly hold the camra still. Or maybe she was just jittery frum eatin' all that cake!

It reminded me of anuther grate trip I wint on, last summer with Flat Tyler:

Me an Flat Tyler LOVE Brodway shows. We wint to see Promises, Promises, and we even got to meet the flat stars of the show!

This munth, Flat Tyler is razing munneys for Small Paws Bichon Rescue. For a teeny tiny donayshun of just five buks, yoo'll git a chance to win yer own custum Flat Pet!!! This is espeshully grate if yer mom or dad suks at making Flat Pets and ends up in the emerjinsy room with a gusher like Dan Akroid playing Joolia Child on Saterday Nite Live. (Or makes yoo end up looking like yoo gots too much junk in yer trunk.)

But yoo won't just git a chanse to win yer own flat pet. Yoo can also git a chanse to win one of the Food Lady's kreeayshuns, a custom mixed media portrit like this one she did fur my speshul frend, Daisy!

Click here to check it out!

I'm a littul embarrest...

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Tue, 08 Mar 2011 00:28:00 +0000

Sumtimes I dreem of my speshul frend Daisy win I nap. My big bruther Mao duzn't like bein' Daisy's stand-in. He sez "Git yer pie-hole outta my booty!" I don't like it win he talks meen to me like that.

This cat has a boner blankie, too!

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Fri, 04 Mar 2011 08:24:00 +0000

I thot I was the only cat with a boner blankie, but I see that this cat has one too! I cood watch this moovey all day long!

Whut's werse than vishus deer?

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Wed, 02 Mar 2011 09:53:00 +0000

.... a ZOMBIE vishus deer. And yoo know whut that meens... he wants to eet yer branes!!!!!!!

The aCATemy Awards!

noreply@blogger.com (Karen Nichols) — Sat, 26 Feb 2011 22:49:00 +0000

I am rooting for True Grit to win Best Pikcher at the aCATemy Awards. That is why I am waring my kyoot Rooster Cogbern owtfit. I am not waring cowboy boots cuz the FL sez that yoo can't ware cowboy boots in the howse cuz they'll git the floors derty.

Can't figyer out whut to ware on the Red Carpit? Chek this out!

The Werst Day of My Life

noreply@blogger.com (Karen Nichols) — Sat, 26 Feb 2011 09:46:00 +0000

All week long I have bin wayting for Friday cuz the Food Lady promist be thare wood be snow on Friday and that she wood take me owtside to make snow angels win the snow got heer.

Today I was bugging the Food Lady to take me owt to make snow angels and she kind of ignored me like I didn't even exist. So win Mr TF got home I asked him to take me owtside to make snow angels, and he did, but by that time thare was NO SNOW ANYWARES. He tride to make me feel better by telling me thare was no snow today after all, even tho evry purrson in the Bay Area was wayting for it. I think he was telling a little wite lie so I woodn't think the FL was being lazy and selfish fur not taking me owt to make snow angels.

So as yoo can planely see, it wuz the werst day of my life.

Wordless Wednesday

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 20:17:00 +0000

Whut the....?

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Sun, 20 Feb 2011 08:06:00 +0000

As da grate Jeter Harris wood say, this is disterbin.

Why is this boy about to feed this poor tender yung joosy cat to the vishus deer? I bet he'll grow up to be a cereal murderer.

And then there were three...

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Wed, 16 Feb 2011 21:14:00 +0000

DMM, we are so sad to heer that Pumpkin wint to The Bridge. We're sending all owr purrs and purrayers yer way.

And then there were three...

noreply@blogger.com (Skeezix the Cat) — Wed, 16 Feb 2011 21:14:00 +0000

DMM, we are so sad to heer that Pumpkin wint to The Bridge. We're sending all owr purrs and purrayers yer way.

MY GOOD WIG IS LOST FUREVER

noreply@blogger.com (Karen Nichols) — Wed, 16 Feb 2011 02:32:00 +0000

My face has bin wet all day. I coodn't even git the enerjy to play with the speshul toy my speshulfrend Daisy got me for VD Cuz I wuz so upset. You see, I got a speshul wig to ware to the Royal Wedding in case I git invited. I had it out this morning to think abowtvwhut kyoot owtfit I shood git to go with it. And then I had to poop and win I got bak it wuz gone.

It wuz a vary fansy wig with BANGS and BRADES and PINK RIBBUNS. It kinda looks like this:

If yoo see it, lemme know. I can't offer a reward cuz I shot my wad on Daisy's berthday and vd prezints.