My Two Cents

Victoria's Secret Isn't The Only One To Blame

2013-03-27T09:59:00.001-07:00

Let me start by saying that I am 100% against Victoria's Secret and their new underwear/bra line for middle school aged girls. They call it "Bright Young Things" It will include lace panties, thongs and printed sayings such as "Feeling Lucky?" and "call me" Again, it's aimed at middle school aged girls which would be ages 11-14. This is disturbing and disgusting to me on so many levels.

I learned about this through facebook. Several of my friends have been posting about it and posting letters and posts from parents to Victoria's Secret. I'm glad those parents wrote those letters. I agree with what they are saying. After reading all these posts and after much thought, some other things started bothering me.

Victoria's secret is a huge company. They don't just think up a clothing line for no reason. They do their research. Most companies of this size come up with these ideas based on demand and need for a product. They wouldn't waste their time on a line of clothing that would NOT sell. They want their line ot be a success. They spend a lot of time finding out what's going to work and what won't. Their goal is to make money. What/where do you think they got the idea that this line would sell?
Victoria's secret is not the only ones to blame here. There is a reason they have come to the conclusion that there is a market for thongs that say "call me" on them for middle school aged kids.

I have a 5 (almost 6) year old daughter and a 16 year old son. I am well aware of what kids are wearing today. To school and everywhere else. I see it every day and so many times I have been disturbed by it. I have been vocal about taking a firm stand against this when it comes to choosing my daughters clothing, now and in the future. A lot of parents dress their daughters in dresses and skirts and send them to school. I won't and don't. In fact my daughter doesn't even own a dress. When kids are at school they do things like go out on the playground. I have been witness on way too may occasions where a little girl hangs upside down on the monkey bars and her skirt falls over her head and exposes her crotch to all of her classmates. I find this to be inappropriate. I was at my daughters school once and a young girl with a FULL LENGTH dress on was laying on the sidewalk drawing with chalk. She rolled over and lifted her legs in the air and exposed her crotch to everyone who could see. I have seen younger girls, babies even that are dressed so cute in their little dresses and when they bend over or they are crawling around, everything that shouldn't be exposed is. I don't want anyone seeing those parts of my daughter so I choose to dress her in pants and shorts. The way (most) people dress their daughters is disturbing to me.

I have taken this same stand on bikinis. I have seen babies, toddlers and elementary school aged girls wearing bikinis. I won't allow my daughter to wear a bikini. I find it 100% revolting and wrong. A lot of people see it as cute. I see nothing cute about it. What I find most disturbing is that it's seen as cute when they are young but when they start to develop, it's seen as revealing too much. Parents allow their daughters to weat bikinis from birth and then when they get to a certain age, those same parents say it's not appropriate. They say it's too revealing, suddenly they see it as exposing too much skin.

I have to talk about cheerleading too. I hope my daughter never wants to be a cheerleader because until she gets older, the answer will be "NO WAY!" Even when she is older, I am going to have serious issues if she wants to partake in cheerleading. I'm not at all sure why cheerleading even exists. I find it odd that females jumping around in short skirts, shouting, waving pompoms and jumping in the air is somehow a way of cheering on the football team. That however isn't my point here. The point is that we have these young girls dressed in skirts that clearly show way too much and if that wasn't bad enough, they jump in the air doing splits and exposing their crotches. They do this on display for a crowd of people. Seriously, i thinks it's creepy. Take a moment to think about how cheerleaders are viewed by men and young boys/men. They are seen flat out as sexual objects. The outfits alone are seen as sexual and it's well known that men have sexual fantasies about cheerleaders.

A few years ago my son's school had an end of the year pool party. The girls had to wear t-shirts over their bathing suits because they "showed too much" yet that Friday night at the local football game, 13 year old girls wear in their short skirts, wearing make-up looking like women, looking like one of the top fantasies and sexual desires of men and boys around the world, jumping up in the air and bending over showing their crotches as butt cheeks and that is accepted. That is seen as fine. Let me assure you that there is plenty of males in the crowd watching your daughter do that split and they are thinking "I'm feeling lucky" and "I should call her" and they don't have to be wearing a lace thong with the writing on it.

A sexy nurses costume is almost the same outfit as a cheerleaders. I am pretty sure if you 5 or 11 year old wanted to dress up as a sexy nurse, your answer would be "NO" but the cheerleader outfit is fine.

I have also been witness to young girls of all ages wearing clothes that are too tight or too revealing. From jeans to shirts and everything in between. These girls are dressed more like women than girls.

Keep in mind that underwear and bras are worn under clothing where it cannot be seen. Dresses, skirts, bikinis, too tight or too revealing clothes, clothes that make your daughter look like a woman and cheerleading outfits are worn over the undergarments and they are for everyone to see. So as I see it, a lot of you will allow your daughters to prance around in these clothing items and you don't see anything wrong with it but find it disturbing that Victoria's Secret would come out with the "Bright Young Things" line. Again I ask where do you think Victoria's Secret got the idea that this line of clothes would sell? Again let me state that I am against the production and sale of thongs and bras that are lace and say things like "Call Me" and "Feeling Lucky?"

Now correct me if I am wrong here but until these girls are 18, isn't it the parents responsibility to say what their daughter can and cannot wear? Even if these girls go out and buy these panties and bras, it's our responsibility as parents to know what they are wearing and allow them to wear it or not. I wouldn't buy these underwear for my daughter and if i found them in her drawer, I'd throw them out.

At first I had no intention on even commenting on any of this other than to say I didn't agree with Victoria's Secret. But I kept reading all the posts and it occurred to me that several of you that were posting, are also the ones who let their daughters wear bikinis and or have daughters that are cheerleaders and I found it strange that you are so outraged with VS. Victoria's Secret didn't just pull this idea out of their ass. They see what girls are wearing, they know what parents are buying for their daughters and they know what age those girls are. If you are willing to sexual your Daughter, don't be surprised when a company decides to profit from that.

$318 Worth of Groceries for $123

2013-02-04T14:18:00.004-08:00

Did some shopping today. I got all of the groceries in the 5 pictures below for $123. The Retail Cost would have been $318. I will break each one down separately.

THE BREAKDOWN

Bi-Lo
Meal Deal:
Buy (2) Digiorno pizzas for $13.98
Get the following free:
Bread sticks
TGI Fridays snacks
Drive Thru sandwiches
Used: Buy 2 Digiorno pizzas get 1 FREE coupon $7 value

Marcal Toilet paper on sale $4.99 each
Used: (2) $1 off Marcal
Makes them $3.99 each

Yogurts 4 for $5
Used: (2) 50 cents off (2) yogurts doubles to $1 off
Makes them 75 cents each

Dawn on sale $2.99
Used: 50 cents off Dawn doubles to $1 off
Makes it $1.99 (more than I usually pay but I needed it

Soup on clearance 74 cents

Pie crust on sale $1.50

Clear wrap $1.37

Cream cheese on sale $1.50 each

Retail subtotal: $74.52
Final Total: $38.15

Food Lion
Unilever promotion: Buy $30 worth of participating products and get $10 off instantly at register
I will break this down further after totals.

Dove bar soap on sale $6.99 each
Used (2) $4 off dove bar soap
Makes them $2.99 each

Dove body wash on sale $4.26 each
Used (2) $2 off body wash
Makes them $2.26 each

Dove shampoo on sale 2 for $3
Used $1.50 off conditioner when you buy shampoo

Wishbone salad dressing on sale 2 for $5
Used (2) 70 cents off wishbone
Makes them $1.80 each (more than I usually spend but I needed it and it qualified me for promotion)

Johnsonville sausage on sale $2.99 each
Used (2) $1 off 2 johnsonville
and food lion $2 off $10 in meat dept
Makes them $2 each

Brown rice on sale 77 cents
Used food lion (in store kiosk) 75 cents any food lion rice
Makes it 2 cents
you read that right 2 cents

Food Lion ice cream on sale $2.59
Used food lion (kiosk) 75 cents off any food lion ice cream
Makes it $1.84

Ball Park hot dogs on sale 2 for $5
Used Food lion (kiosk) $1 off 2 hot dogs
Makes them $2 each

Food lion coffee on sale $2.59
Used food lion (kiosk) $1 off any food lion coffee
Makes it $1.59

Hot dog buns on sale 2 for $4

Oranges on sale $2.99

Retail Subtotal: $70.26
Final Total: $34.74

Unilever promotion break down

Retail before sales and coupons for the above: $42.48
Sale Price total: $33.56 (gets me above $30 to qualify for $10 off)
Total after $10 off promotion deduction: $23.56
Total after the $14.90 in coupons that I used: $8.66 (that is less than the $8.99 retail price of 1 pack of bar soap)
Savings: $33.82

Tomorrow is the last day of this sale and I am going back to do it again with different products lol

Ingles
Nothing to brag about here except the pretzels. I needed the pecans and caramel for a pie my husband is begging me to make. I also needed the gatorade.

The pecans were on sale for $6.98 ($1 off retail price)

The pretzels were B1G1 @ $2.58
Makes them $1.49 each
Used (2) 50 cent off 1 which doubles to $1 off 1
Makes them 49 cents each

My total was $23.62 for 5 items...compared to the other stores, this is not good lol

Walgreens
This is a complicated transaction with many coupons, sales, register rewards and balance reward points. I am not going to write it all out. I usually do smaller transactions so I call roll over my register rewards and balance points. I did not do that this time. I made 2 transactions the above pic shows both combined. Because I didn't make smaller transactions, I spent more out of pocket than I would have liked to but I will not be going to town enough times this week to do enough of them so I had to make this work.

Total before sales, coupons, register rewards and balance points: $140.16
Final total: $36.70
Savings of: $103.46

CVS

Renu on sale $7.99 with $5 ECB back
Used: $2 off renu
Makes it $5.99 with $5 ECB back

Rapid sleep on sale $1.99 with $1.99 ECB back (FREE)

Used: $6 ECB from last week

Paid: $2.65
Got back $7.99 ECB
(earned $1 ECB with my green bag tag)
PROFIT of: $5.34

Retail Total for all above purchases: approx $318
Final Total: $123
Savings: approx $195

This Weeks Food Lion Deals and Food Lions Newer Perks

2013-01-30T10:34:00.003-08:00

Food Lion
Retail: $65.21
Paid: $41.78

I saved $11.13 just in store sales and I used $12.80 in coupons.
Food Lion is really steeping up their game in prices, sales, promotions and in store coupons. Instead of my usual price break down of each item, I'd rather tell you more about Food Lion cause I know some of my friends don't shop there much.

The past few weeks, FL was running there store brand promotion. They do this ALL the time. You buy their brand (food lion or my essentials) of participating items and save a certain dollar amount for a certain number of items bought. Sometimes you save instantly which means the price comes off at the register. sometimes you get a catalina coupon (comes out with receipt) The promotion usually runs for a couple of weeks at a time. This past sale was for a catalina coupon. The savings look like this:
Buy 4 Save $1
Buy 6 Save $1.50
Buy 8 Save $2
Buy 10 Save $2.50
Buy 20 Save $5
Buy 40 Save $10

Last week I earned a $3.25 off coupon for my purchases.

FL also prints out catalina coupons, quite frequently for money off your next shopping order. That same week I got a $3.50 off a purchase of $35.00 or more.

FL also gives great online coupons (register/sign up on food lions website) This week I got and used a $1 off 3 cans of hunts tomatoes (on sale $1 each)
I also got and used a $2 off produce purchase of $7 or more

FL also has a in store kiosk now. I love this kiosk lol It prints food lion specific coupons for that day only and manufacturers coupons with future expiration dates. It is a sheet or more of coupons plus extras like recipes. They are different every day. My 2 faves are $1 off FL butter (1lb) and $1 off FL peanut butter. REGULAR price of butter is $2.47 so $1.47 for a lb of butter is awesome. The peanut butter is $8.48 for 4 lb container making it $7.48 and that is just awesome too. Today I also got and used a $1 off FL brand frozen potatoes (fries) Regular price is $1.99 per bag. Again, 99 cents for a bag of fries or tater tots is pretty damn good. I also got and used a 50 cent off 3 celeste pizzas on sale for 99 cents each. My son loves these (one of his unhealthy treats lol)

Today I ended up using $12.25 cents in JUST Food Lion coupons and a 55 cent manufacturer coupon. I saved a total of $23.93 in store sales and coupons! I'm loving Food Lion!!

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CVS Deals 4/16

2012-04-21T06:55:00.004-07:00

Transaction #1

Naturelief on sale $8.49 with $8.49 ECB back
Act on sale $3.99 with $1 ECB back

Retail: $13.58
Sale price: $12.48
Used $1 ECB from prior trip
and $1 off Act coupon
Paid: $11.32
Got back: $9.49

Transaction #2

Lysol no touch soap dispenser on sale $6.99

Colgate on sale $2.99 with $2 ECB back

Tums freshers on sale $2.99

Hersheys on sale $1.19

Retail: $26.94

Sale price: $24.14

Used:

(2) $3 off Lysol no touch coupons

(2) $1 off colgate coupons

$1.50 off tums coupon

$9.49 ECB from transaction #1

Paid: $6.78

Got back $4 ECB

** the only reason I bought the hersheys was because I got a 50 cent off coupon from the CVS in store kiosk and then I FORGOT to use it *GASP* oh the horror. Makes me so damn mad when I do that and I seem to do it all the time**

Total for both trips:

Retail: $40.52

Sale price: $36.62

Paid: $18.10

Got back $4 ECB

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$103.84 Worth Of Stuff At Walgreens For $26.78 And 99 Cents Back!

2012-04-21T05:57:00.003-07:00

TRANSACTION #1

Similasan nasal allergy relief drops on sale $6 with $6 RR back

Pepsi next on sale 99 cents with 99 cents RR back

Retail: $10.05

Sale price: $7.46

Used $1.50 off Similasan coupon

Paid: $5.96

Got back $6.99 RR

Profit $1.04

Transaction #1

Nasal Ease allergy reliever on sale $9 with $9 RR back

Goody ouchless hair bands on sale $1.99 with $1 RR back

Retail: $16.72

Sale price: $11.73

Used $6.99 RR from Transaction #1

Paid: $4.74

Got back: $10 RR

Profit $5.26

Transaction #3

Olives on sale 99 cents each with in-ad coupon

Mac and cheese on sale B1G1 @ $1.79 with in-ad coupon

Raisins on sale $1.99 with in-ad coupon

Pepsi next on sale 99 cents with 99 cents RR back

Pants on clearance $1.74

Foil on sale 99 cents each with in-ad coupon

Hunts tomato sauce on sale 3/$1 with in-ad coupon

Egg gum on clearance 12 cents each

Cookies and cream bunny on clearance 18 cents each

Peeps on clearance 44 cents

Lg. bunnies with filling 32 cents each

Retail: $43.31

sale price: $18.37

Used $10RR from Transaction #2

Paid: $8.37

Got back 99 cents RR

My original plan was to buy more of the 2 allergy meds with RR's back. I would have rolled over my RR's and did a few more smaller transactions to buy the stuff that didn't have RR's back. BUT they were out of stock by Tues. so I had to do this larger transaction in order to get the things I wanted that were on sale.

Transaction # 4 and 5

Transaction #4

Similasan allergy relief on sale $6 with $6 RR back

Pants on clearance $1.74

Retail: $15.50

Sale price: $8.26

Used $1.50 off Similasan coupon and 99 cents RR from transaction #3

Paid $5.77

Got back $6 RR

Profit 23 cents

** when I went back this time, they had 1 Similasan back in stock**

Transaction #5

Foil on sale 99 cents with in-ad coupon

Pants on clearance $1.74 each

Pepsi next on sale 99 cents with 99 cents RR back **NOT SHOWN**

Retail: $18.26

Sale price: $7.94

Used $6 RR from transaction #4

Paid: $1.94

Got back 99 cents RR

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Bi-Lo Trip $161.95 worth of groceries for $81.35 Saved more than I spent!!

2012-04-07T18:00:00.000-07:00

Bi-Lo is by far my favorite store for deals, promotions and their coupon policy.

Total before sales and coupons was $161.95

Total out of pocket $81.35

Total saved $83.96

Total Bi-Lo advertised savings $58.41

Total savings in coupons $25.55

Some of the deals:

Southern Home (SH, Bi-Lo store brand) Chicken Nuggets B1G1 @ $8.99

Kosher salt on sale 89 cents used bi-lo e-coupon 50 cents off makes it 39 cents. reg. $1.19

Pam cooking spray on sale $2.50 Bi-lo e-coupon 51 cents off makes it $1.99 also have mail in rebate for the full amount paid so in the end, it's FREE reg. $3.29

Smart Balance cooking spray on sale $2.50 used 75 cent off coupon making it $1.75 reg. price $2.95

Hefty Cups on sale B1G1 @ $3.18 making them $1.59 each

Almond breeze almond milk $3.18 used 55 cents off coupon (doubles to $1.10 thanks to bi-lo's coupon policy which doubles up to 60 cent off coupons) Making it $2.08

Silk almond milk on sale $3.00 used $1 off coupon makes it $2 reg. $3.19

Spinach on sale $1.97 each. reg. $2.79 each.

Dole frozen fruit on sale B1G1 @ $5.99 makes $2.99 each used $1 off 2 coupon makes them $2.49 each

Planters peanut butter on sale $2.50 each used (4) $1 off coupons makes $1.50 each plus *fuel perks promotion: buy 4 participating products and get 20 cents off per gallon*

Weber chicago steak seasoning on sale $2 used 75 cent off coupon makes it $1.25 reg. $2.89

Got2b hair gel on sale B1G1 @ 5.99 makes them $2.99 each used (4) $3 off coupons makes all 4 FREE

Vlasic relish on sale B1G1 @ $1.89 makes them 94 cents each used (2) 75 cent off coupons makes them 19 cents each.

Voskos greek yogurt B1G1 @ $1.49 makes them 74 cents each used (2) $1 off 3 coupons makes them 41 cents each. reg.

Dixie crystals sugar 4lb. on sale $2.89 used $1 off coupon makes it $1.89 reg. $3.19

Southern Home brown rice on sale 4 for $3 makes them 75 cents each reg. 97 cents each

croutons B1G1 @ $1.50 makes them 75 cents each

Dog food on sale $9.99 used $1 off coupon makes it $8.99 reg. $12.99

Ingles Trip! $190.50 worth of groceries for $115.22

2012-04-07T16:38:00.000-07:00

There is not much to tell here. This wasn't the greatest in deals, but then again, I got produce, meats and frozen veggies and overall, that makes it pretty damn good for $115.22 if you ask me.
Some of the great deals were:
Head and shoulders $4.48 each but I had a coupon for B1G1 making them $2.24 each
The frozen veggies were $1 each. I bought 20 bags. $20. I had 10 coupons for $1 off 2 So $10 off 20 makes it 20 bags of frozen veggies for $10 or 50 cents each.

CVS Trip!

2012-04-07T16:19:00.000-07:00

So I headed out to CVS to pick up a few things that were on sale and things I needed.

I actually did 2 separate transactions this day.
First:
Complete multi purpose solution on sale $8.99 with $8.99 ECB back Retail price $12.99
I had a $3 ECB from the in store kiosk
and a $3.90 gift card
I used both
Total out of pocket $2.49
Got back $8.99 ECB
Making it free + $6.50 profit

Next I bought:
Coke on sale $2.50 reg. price $5.29
CVS allergy liquid $12.99
Tums $3.99 with $1 ECB back reg. price $5.29
Dawn 99 cents each reg. price $1.77
Total retail $30.65
Paid out of pocket $12.96
Got back $1 ECB

So the totals for this whole trip:
Retail price $39.64
Out of pocket $15.45
Savings $24.19
and $1 ECB back

Homemade Healthy Granola Swap!

2012-04-03T16:12:00.000-07:00

On the same show that I saw the Kale chip recipe, I saw a swap for granola. I love granola so this was something I really wanted to try too. I should say that the show is Hungry Girl on Food Network.

Granola is something I have always loved. It can be loaded with Fat, calories and sugar though and that's just no good. This recipe is so simple and easy and it is really tasty. You can flavor it too.

Here is the actual recipe:

1/4 cup old fashioned slow cooking oats

1/4 cup puffed rice

1/4 cup puffed wheat

1 1/2 TBSP sugar free pancake syrup

Freeze dried apples

Mix everything EXCEPT apples.

Spray baking sheet or dish with cooking spray

Put granola in dish

Bake @ 275 for 30-35 min flipping once halfway through

add apples when done

Now I didn't have the apples and I do not like maple syrup. I used honey. I also doubled the recipe. I also added a few drops of vanilla and almond extract and some cinnamon to the honey and mixed well before mixing it in the granola. I say add whatever you like and make it your own.

This granola is a pretty healthy snack. It is also great as a topping. I mixed it in greek yogurt. YUMMY! Kids also like this snack.

Kale Chips. My New Favorite Healthy Snack.

2012-04-03T15:50:00.000-07:00

Recently I watched a cooking show in which Kale Chips were made. I had heard of them several times before but never really thought about making them. Since I have changed my eating habits and cut out 98% of processed foods, I figured now was the time to try them.

I worked in the deli dept of a grocery store for a short while when i was a teenager. Kale was used in the display case as garnish and decoration around the meats and such. I never even knew you could eat it. I have been eating it in salads and using it in my green protein shakes (up coming blog post) I really like it and it's really good for you.

So Last night I made Kale chips for the first time. OH. MY. GOD. I can't even get over how good I think they are. The Kale was on sale 99 cents/lb so it was cheap too.

So basically you wash and DRY the Kale. Make sure it is dry for best results. My first batch I tossed the kale in olive oil. I shouldn't have. The second batch I made using cooking spray and they came out much better.

I sprayed a baking sheet lightly with olive oil cooking spray. Placed kale on baking sheet in single layer. Sprayed them lightly with cooking spray and sprinkled with salt and pepper. Bake @ 425 for 5-8 minutes. It's that easy. This bowl has about 60+ calories. I swear to you, I can't stop eating them!

They are light and crispy and full of flavor. I'm on a mission to try new foods that are healthy but that also taste good. I refuse to eat something I don't like. I hope you will all try these. It's cheap, quick, easy and worth trying, even if you don't end up liking them. I have heard a lot of people say that kids really like them too!

I Made Veggie Stock This Weekend!

2012-04-03T11:55:00.000-07:00

Here is the link for my original post about saving your veggie scraps for veggie stock, if you haven't read it already.

http://mytwocents-meliss.blogspot.com/2012/03/save-your-veggie-scraps-for-soup-stock.html

This weekend I had enough to make a nice stock.

I had enough to fill my 22 quart stock pot 3/4 of the way full.

The finished product.

Great Grocery Trip This Week $73.33 worth of groceries for $27.79

2012-04-03T11:01:00.000-07:00

Bi-Lo

Total before sales and coupons $73.33

Total after sales and coupons $27.79

Savings of $45.54

Kale was on sale 99 cents/lb

Spinach on sale $1.97 each

Caffeine tablets on sale $2.49 (40 count)

Wisk on sale $3.99 used $2 off manufacturers coupon, made it $1.99

Pantene gel on sale 2 for $7 Used Bi-Lo E-coupon $1 off 2 and manufacturers coupon $1 off 2 made it $2.50 each

Lysol no touch kitchen system on sale B1G1 @ $10.49 used 4 manufacturers coupons for $3 off each made then $2.25 each

My Quest For A Healthier, Better ME!

2012-03-12T17:34:00.000-07:00

In my quest for a healthier and better me, I have been working on exercising daily and eating healthier. I refuse to count calories or points or anything else. I know what the right foods are and I know what the wrong ones are. I have been working really hard on eating MORE whole foods and LESS processed foods. I'm also doing that on a tight budget.

BREAKFAST
Protein shake:
vanilla whey powder
almond milk
spinach
flax seed meal
banana

SNACK
orange

LUNCH
oatmeal with:
almond milk
plum amazins
grapenuts

DINNER
Beef and broccoli with carrots
Harri covert
brown rice/bulgar wheat mix
Mixed greens salad:
tomato, red and green pepper,
pineapple, radish, scallion
pomegranate balsamic vinegar for dressing
Fat free skim milk to drink

DESSERT
Greek yogurt
grape fruit

Drank 90 oz. water throughout day

EXERCISE
Pilates
5 miles on treadmill
incline 6
1 mile in morning
1 mile at noon
3 miles late afternoon
1 mile worth of sprints at 6.0 1/10 mile at a time

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5 Walgreens Transactions. All FREE Plus PROFIT!

2012-03-08T11:00:00.001-08:00

TRANSACTION #1

Nasal spray on sale $5 with $5 RR back (FREE)

Toothpaste on sale $3 with $3 RR back (FREE)

Gum on sale 69 cents each (with in store coupon found in weekly circular)

Total retail $14.69

Total sale price $10.01

Used $8 RR **(4) $2 RR's**

Paid $2.01

Got back $8 ($3 and $5)

Making all of it free + $5.99 profit

TRANSACTION #2

See Transaction #1 details for prices

Total retail $12.02

Total sale price $8.54

Used $4 RR

Paid $4.54

Got back $8 RR ($3 and $5)

Making both FREE with $3.46 profit

TRANSACTION # 3

See Transaction #1 for prices

Razor on sale $9.99 with $4 RR back

Total retail $20.03

Total sale price $15.34

Used:

$4 off razor coupon (from sunday paper)

$5 RR

Paid $6.34

Got back $7 RR ($3 and $4)

Making it all FREE with 66 cents profit

TRANSACTION #4

See Transaction #1 and for prices

Razor on sale $9.99 with $4 RR back

Total retail $20.03

Total sale price $15.34

Used:

$4 off razor coupon (from sunday paper)

$5 RR

Paid $6.34

Got back $7 RR ($3 and $4)

Making it all FREE with 66 cents profit

TRANSACTION #5

See transaction #1 for prices

Gaz-it modeling fun $1

Total retail $12.07

Total sale prices $7.88

Used (2) $3 RR

Paid $1.88

Got back $5 RR

Making it all FREE with $3.12 profit

All 5 transactions plus the one from yesterday came to:

Total retail $107.67

Paid $25.56

Got back $27 RR

Making ALL of it Free with $1.44

I'd like to thank Walgreens GIVING me all of this stuff for free and PAYING me $1.44 on top of that!

This week I have a master plan in mind here. I have been rolling over and saving up my RR's so at the end of the week, I can buy 4 lbs of whey protein powder for FREE Retail value $40 on sale for $30. I already have $27 RR to put towards it and I will earn more tomorrow.

Chicken and Mixed Veggies in Brown sauce

2012-03-07T14:46:00.001-08:00

I baked split chicken breasts the other night and used the leftover chicken in this dish. I didn't measure it, I just used what I had. I also used whatever veggies I had. I just eye ball the amounts to a ratio I like. You can use any meat you like and any combo of veggies for this dish.

You all know I love split chicken breasts because they are always on sale for 99 cents/lb. I baked all the chicken at once and made a couple meals out of it. #1 baked chicken with gravy. #2 chicken salad #3 BBQ chicken (just for 2 lunches) and this dish. I pulled the chicken off the bone for the chicken salad, BBQ chicken and this chicken and veggies in brown sauce.

1 bottle of low sodium soy sauce (kikoman is the brand I like most by far)
3 TBSP corn starch
1-2 cups of water
3 TBSP brown sugar
3 cloves of garlic. minced or pressed, whatever you like
1 TBSP minced onion
1/2 tsp fresh ginger. crushed, minced, whatever you like
Use as much or as little ginger as you like.
I cut 2 chunks of ginger and cook in sauce but remove before eating.
I am not the biggest fan of ginger but without it, it doesn't taste right

Make this sauce your own. Use more or less of any of the ingredients.
This is just how we like it. The above recipe makes about 4-6 servings.
There are times when I doubled it to make more.

Cook all ingredients in pot on med heat then simmer until thickened. (corn starch needs to be cooked out)
Pour over meat and veggies and bake just to meld all ingredients together. 10-20 minutes @ 350

I used frozen veggies in this dish. I use frozen veggies OFTEN. They go on sale all the time at our 3 local grocery stores for $1 and I try to keep stocked up. The broccoli I actually purchase mostly in bulk because we eat a lot of it. It is my Sons favorite. I always do the broccoli florets. I put all the veggies in a baking dish or any dish that is appropriate size and I defrost them in the microwave. This way they will never be over cooked and all the nutrients won't cook out. Also, I made this whole meal for about $10! That's about $1.70 cents per serving!

Tuesday Drugstore Deals

2012-03-07T10:08:00.000-08:00

On sale at CVS for 99 cents with 99 cent ECB back

Paid $1.06 got 99 cent ECB back.

It's like getting jelly beans for 7 cents.

WALGREENS

Razor on sale $9.99 with $4 RR back

Nasal mist on sale $5 with $5 RR back

Colgate on sale $3 with $3 RR back

Orange slices on sale 69 cents each (must use in store coupon in circular)

Skittles on clearance 69 cents

Total Retail $28.83

Total sale price $20.06

Used:

$4 off razor coupon (from sunday paper)

(3) $2 RR's

(2) $4 RR's

Paid $4.05

Got back $12 RR ($3, $4 and $5)
So I got all of the above for free + $7.95 profit

AWESOME! CVS Deals

2012-03-06T07:19:00.000-08:00

TRANSACTION #1

CVS was running a sale: buy $20 worth of participating pet products and get $5 Extra Care Bucks (EBC) back

Beneful dog food on sale $4.50 (reg. $6.99)

Total Retail $14

Total sale price $9

Used (2) $2.50 off bag of beneful (from sunday paper)

AND $3 ECB from prior week

Paid $1.61

I only bought the 2 bags this time so I won't get the $5 EBC till I reach the $20 needed to earn it. Which I will do in my last transaction.

TRANSACTION #2

**NOTE: Please notice at the bottom of the above receipt my year to date savings are $223.05. My year to date spending is ONLY $168.52 Since January I have saved MORE than I spent out of pocket. To think that for years, I thought CVS was to expensive for me to even shop there at all is LAUGHABLE now! **

UP2U gum on sale 99 cents ea.(reg. $1.49 ea.)

Razor on sale $9.99 with $4 ECB back (reg. $12.79)

Total retail $16.27

Total sale price $11.97

Used $3.79 ECB (from week before)

(2) $1.00 off pack of gum (from sunday paper)

$4 0ff razor (from sunday paper)

Paid $3.01

Got back $4 ECB

TRANSACTION #3

Beneful dog food on sale $4.50 ea. (reg $6.99)

Fructopia shampoo $2.50 ea. (reg. $3.39 ea.)

Candy on sale 2/$1 (reg. 87 cents ea.)

Total retail $32.97

Total sale price $21.50

Used:

(3) $2.50 off bag of beneful (from sunday paper)

(2) $2.00 off bottle shampoo (from CVS in store coupon booklet) *found on rack where circulars are*

(3) 25 cent off 2 candy (from CVS in store coupon kiosk) *found in front of store*

$4 ECB

$1 ECB (from my CVS green bag tag) *need to purchase bag tag. you get $1 ECB every 4th time it's scanned*

Total paid $5.50

Got back $10 ECB (should have been $5 EBC but due to and thanks to error, it printed twice YAY me!)

Great Week Of Deals At Walgreens

2012-03-05T19:33:00.000-08:00

This was an extreme week at Walgreens for me. They were running sales on things that I really wanted and needed and also on some thing I know I can turn around and sell. I also made bigger purchases than I normally do in a single transaction. I did this because I really wanted to make sure I got as many of these items as I could in the week they were running the sale. Our store is a small one so more often than not, they run out of the item I want within a few days of the sale start date.

I have been so unorganized at home lately and I really wanted to blog each transaction right after I made them. However, nothing in my life seems to ever work out the way it's supposed to, no matter how well I plan it all out. So now that the week is over, I have a whole load of info to have to post at once. I also lost a receipt. I also didn't price check the reg. retail prices. I will give a round about price as best I can. I am so annoyed with myself right now lol So i am going to do my best to lay it all out minus the fine details. I am really working on getting my shit together and finding/making the time to blog more often. If anyone has any questions on further details, feel free to ask. I added the receipts this time so you could see the break down.

TRANSACTION #1

I started the week with $2 in RR (register rewards)

Bluscience on sale $10 with $10 RR (reg price about $25)

On the go drink mix on sale $8 with $8 RR (reg price about $16 I think)

Total Retail $ $41.98

Total sale price $19.22

Used $2 RR

Paid $17.22

Got back $18 RR (10 and 8)

TRANSACTION #2

Act on sale 2/$8 with $2 RR back (reg. about $5 each)

Ultimate Flora on sale $10 with $10 RR (reg. price $24.99)

Walgreens bags on sale $1.19 (must use in ad coupon) (reg. about $2.05 each)

Note: I love the quality of wags bags. I buy them as filler items even though I could just buy something for 10 cents and bring down my cost. Wags runs this same sale on bags ALL the time and I stock up every time.

Wags only lets you use 1 coupon per item (RR is considered a coupon) so if you had 4 RR's and wanted to buy only 2 items but use all your RR's, you need to buy filler items. If you have 4 coupons you need to purchase 4 items.

Another note: The ultimate flora rang up reg price but they refunded me. My prices below will be different from what the receipt says.

Total retail $40.58

Total sale price $23.03

Used the $18 I had in RR ($10 and $8)

Total out of pocket $5.03

Got back $12 RR ($2 and $10)

TRANSACTION #3

Glade on sale $3.49 with $1.50 RR (reg. price unknown)

Melatonin on sale $4 with $4 RR (reg. price unknown)

Bags $1.19 each (reg. $2.05 each)

On the go on sale $8 with $8 RR (reg. $16)

Burts Bees cough drops on sale $1.99 with $2 RR (reg. unknown)

Spinner thingy (for Isabella) $1

Total retail $38.02

Total sale price $23.54

Used $12 RR and $2 off glade (from paper)

Paid $9.54

Got back $15.50 RR

TRANSACTION #4

Bags $1.19 each (reg. about $2 each)

Ultimate Flora $10 with $10 RR (reg. $24.99)

Razor on sale $9.99 with $4 RR back (reg $12.99)

Nivea lip balm on sale $2.99 with $2 RR

Pez 37 cents hearts 12 cents (valentines clearance)

Total Retail $51.85

Total sale price $28.87

Used $15.50 in RR and $4 0ff razor (from Sunday paper)

Total paid $9.37

Got back $16 RR ($10, $4 and $2)

NOTE: I won't list prices for each item again unless they items that weren't mentioned above!

TRANSACTION #5

Conair Dryer on sale $17.99 (reg price unknown)

Total retail $44.21

Total sale price $29.32

Used $16 RR and $2 off glade (from sunday paper)

Paid $11.32

Got back $7.50 RR ($4, $2 and $1.50)

TRANSACTION #6

Total Retail $13.94

Total sale price $7

Used $6 RR NOTE: Still have $1.50 from last week that I didn't use here

Paid $3.96

Got back $6 RR ($4 and $2)

TRANSACTION #7

Candy on sale 2/$1

Total Retail $26.75

Total sale price $11.76

Used $10 RR

Paid $1.74

Got back $10 RR

Here is where filler items come in I used (3) RR's a $4, $4 and $2 since I wanted to use 3 I needed to buy 3 items!

TRANSACTION #8

Belvita breakfast biscuits on sale $2.99 with $2 RR back (reg. $3.99)

Total retail $75.99

Total sale price $41.51

Used $10 RR and $4 off razor (from sunday paper)

Paid $27.51

Got back $25.50 RR

NOTE: This was one of my larger transactions. If you go with fewer items at a time using as many RR's as you can, your out of pocket prices will be so much lower. I had to do this because the week was almost over so it was my last chance to stock up on these needed items.

TRANSACTION #9

All candy on clearance and bought as filler items. I will not list each price, they are on receipt

Total retail $42.77

Total sale price $16.82

Used $13.50 RR

Paid $3.32

Got back $12 RR

TRANSACTION #10

Total retail $58.36

Total sale price $34.48

Used $20 RR

Paid $14.48

Got back $21.50 RR

TRANSACTION #11

Total retail $20.91

Total sale price $16.91

Used $12.50 RR and $4 off razor (from sunday paper)

Paid $1.41

Got back $8 RR

TRANSACTION #12

Total Retail $4.05

Total sale price $3.05

Used $2 RR

Paid $1.05

Got back $2 RR

After all was said and done this week I spent $105.95 and got back the $22 RR shown in above picture

That's like paying $83.95 for $414.27 worth of stuff.

The $22 RR will be rolled over in this weeks sales. Unfortunately, there aren't as many items on sale this week that I need or want.

Also note that most of the items I bought were needed items. Household, vitamins/supplements, beauty supplies, food, hair dryer that was needed to replace mine (it just broke) and a FEW goodies.

FYI I never heard of those Belvita breakfast biscuits. They are really really good. Everyone is my house loved them. This is the kind of thing I love about Wags and CVS. I get to try new things for a fraction of the price.

Save Your Veggie Scraps For Soup Stock

2012-03-01T07:59:00.000-08:00

While I am on the topic of soup, I should give you this little tip that I LOVE!

When I was younger I have the privilege of living with my Aunt and Uncle for a while and spending summers at their house. My Aunt was a bit of a health freak to say the least and very big on nutrition and making everything from scratch. I learned a lot of tips and recipes from her that I still use today 20 years later. My Creamy Corn Chowder is actually her recipe. They had a garden and ate a ton of fresh veggies. She would save all veggie scraps for cutting, ends, peels, seeds, etc or a veggie that was going to go bad before it could be used. She would throw all these veggies in a ziploc or clean (of course) garbage bag and pop them into the freezer. Each time she had more, she would add to the bag. I use a garbage bag. When she had enough veggies frozen and saved up, she would dump them into a stock pot, fill it with water and let it simmer away for the most AMAZING veggie stock. You can also use these with bones of whatever meat/poultry and make whatever kind of stock you want.

I also freeze carcases, bones and scraps from meats/ poultry so they will keep until I am ready to use them. I also do this in a garbage bag. I do it in it's own bag though so I have my choice for a veggie only stock if I want. I don't eat much meat and prefer veggie stock anyway. I crush all of it down as much as I can before putting it in the bag, to save space in my freezer. It will keep for a long time. I don't want to or can't always make stock as soon as I have the bones etc ready for it so this is a really great tip.

Once the stock was finished and cooled, she would fill a bunch of containers or even ziploc bags and freeze those. I like to use a bunch of assorted size containers AND bags. Some of them very small, only fitting a cup or 2 cups or even just a half cup of stock. I do this because you can take out a little or a lot as needed. This stock is not just good for soup bases. You can cook your rice in it, instead of plain water for extra flavor. You can also add small amounts to sauces. Use small amounts to deglaze pans for a pan sauce. Use it in gravy instead of water for flavor. Boil pasta in it for a tasty side dish or to amp up whatever pasta dish you are making. There are really an endless amount of possibilities for this gem.It's so easy and saves on cost and it's a lot more healthy for you than any stock you can buy. Saves time too when you always have it frozen and on hand.

I love this idea so much that my Mom bought me a 16 quart stock pot for my 16th Birthday. I still have that pot and I use it all the time.

CREAMY CORN CHOWDER

2012-03-01T07:33:00.000-08:00

A friend requested the recipe for my creamy corn chowder, so here it is.
A lot of people cringe when I mention this soup. I have to admit that I did too when I first heard of it. I am also not really a big soup eater. That being said, the minute I tasted it, I was in love. It has been one of my favorites and I crave it often. I love pairing it with grilled cheese on whole wheat. I break up the sandwich and throw it right in my bowl. My husband is more of a dipper. I also like to sprinkle some Parmesan cheese on it as well. Try that out.

INGREDIENTS:

3 small potatoes
diced into 1/2 inch cubes

2 cups boiling water

1/2 tsp. salt

1/2 medium onion

2 TBSP. butter

1 3/4 cups fresh, frozen or canned corn
about 1 pkg if frozen
if you use canned, drain well

2 TBSP sliced canned, jarred or fresh pimento *optional*

2 cups of milk

1/2 cup half and half

1 TBSP. brown sugar

1/2 tsp. Paprika

salt and pepper to taste

DIRECTIONS:

1. Cook potatoes in boiling water and salt until tender. About 20 min. Drain.

2. Saute onion in butter until tender.

3. Stir onions into potato, corn, pimento, milk, half and half, brown sugar and paprika. Salt and pepper to taste.

4. Simmer 20 to 30 min longer until soup is thickened.

So that is the original recipe but of course, I like to stray off the beaten path and make it my own. This is really the kind of soup that you can make to your liking. I have no idea how many servings this recipe makes but I do know that it is not enough for me. I make at least double and I freeze a bunch of it. I also don't use the same ratio's of ingredients. I like my soup thick, chunky and hearty, with lots or corn, potatoes and onion and not so much broth. Now I sure don't measure water to boil potatoes lol Sometimes if I have a vegetable stock made or frozen, I use that instead of water to boil potatoes for extra flavor. I also like this soup to be sweet and spicy which it kind of is on it's own but I amp it up a bit. I use a bit more sugar, paprika and pepper, lots of pepper. I do this little by little, tasting each time until I like the way it tastes.

On a side note. Cream does not agree so I would rather not use the half and half at all. The majority of the time that I make this soup, I use a rue. Equal amounts of butter and flour that you cook off in the pot first then add the milk and simmer for a few min before adding any of the other ingredients. I also use fat free skim milk. This also cuts calories :)

Sorry Ladies But I'm Tired Of Your Bullshit

2011-12-14T16:34:00.000-08:00

Let me warn you in advance, this blog post has foul language among other things. It is not a post for everyone and it is not to please any of you. Some of you will not like it at all. I could have taken more time and written it to please the masses. That however goes against everything I believe in. If I wrote it any other way, it would be taking my personality right out of it. That is just never going to happen. I'm not one bit sorry about it either. This is my blog and my point of view. If you don't like it, that is really fine with me. I have been kind enough to warn you in advance. I hope that all of you will at least read it, whether it's your thing or not.

Dear Women,

PART 1
This is what I keep hearing too many of you saying, way too often:

Your proud of being a bitch and/or a cunt
A large penis is a must if a guy wants to fuck you
You make fun of guys who have a small dick
You rip him apart in public or to other people, especially your friends and his friends
You cut him down for everything and anything
A fat wallet is also a must, because he must be able to buy you this and that and shoes and purses and DIAMONDS or jewels and take you on a vacation and provide you with all the finer things in life.
You want men to act like and have the emotions of a woman
You make excuses to NOT have sex.
You make excuses to NOT suck a dick
You use sex as a weapon and/or a threat
You think you are above serving a man. For instance, making him a sandwich as if that makes you some kind of a slave
You talk shit about your exes

PART 2
This is what you say you can't find:

A good quality man who treats you right
A man who is loyal to you
A man who makes you happy
A man who is happy with and because of you
LOVE, unconditional love

PART 3
Now let me state the obvious:

No man wants a bitch or a cunt for a partner. You will never here a guy utter the words: "Well if only she were a bitch or a cunt, I'd date her and/or be able to fall in love with her" or " could you be more of a bitch and a cunt, i'd really appreciate it"

Not all men have a big dick. Lets just be real, it's not the size that matters if he knows what he's doing. If he doesn't, try teaching him instead of expecting him to somehow read your fucking mind and then complaining about how he isn't good in bed. Maybe he is good, maybe you just suck at asking for what you want and telling him what would make it better and then actually giving him the chance to try to please you. P.S maybe your pussy is just blown out and sorry, but that's just not his problem. Nor can the size of his dick be blamed for that.

Guys have feelings too ya know, they are humans and have feelings just like us females. Those feelings can be and are hurt by your words and actions. Maybe they don't express that as much because society tells us that doing so isn't manly. I am a female so I know what you ladies say about men to other females. Since I am a female, I also know that if your man talked about you like that to your friends, you would be heartbroken. In tears. Your friends would all be in disbelief that he would treat you like that and feel sooo sorry for you. You'd probably get rid of the guy too, for treating you like that. Yet somehow, it's ok and FUNNY to you to do it to men. This one really fucking pisses me off.

Not all guys make or have the same amount of money. Money is also something you can make and save. Meaning, he may not be rich but that doesn't mean he can't provide for you. You can also save up for the things you want. Including the "bullshit objects you MUST have" I am really disgusted with how materialistic you ladies have become. Seriously, you need to reevaluate what is really important an necessary in life.

Men are men, they are not women so become a lesbo or deal with what comes with the territory. If you want you man to understand your emotions, try explaining them in man terms. You can't expect him to understand things they way you would express them to your girl friends. It like with kids, if you want them to understand something, you cannot tell them in adult terms, you have to break it down to what a kid understands. We are women, this should come very easy to you. It does for me. He may never feel the same way as you, but he can and will understand your feelings and that's what counts.

SEX! Oh lord. I don't expect everyone to love sex as much as i do, or to want to do it as much as i do. I'm not saying it's bad if you aren't really into it. I mean everyone is different. Let me explain this to you though. When you are in a relationship with someone, what that basically means, is that you promise to not have sex with anyone else lol If you are married, it's the same thing only now you have made that shit legal and binding lol
Serving your man does not make you a slave. Here is the definition of a slave:

slave/slāv/
Noun:
A person who is the legal property of another and is forced to obey them.
Verb:
Work excessively hard: "slaving away for all those years".

Making him a sandwich or getting him a drink doesn't make you a slave. You chose to be in a relationship. You aren't being forced against your will and you are not his property. So this doesn't make you a slave. It makes you a woman who is willing to do nice things for your man. A woman who will tend to your man in the way a man would like and appreciate. If he doesn't appreciate it, well, sorry but you picked that kind of guy to be with. You expect him to give you things and do things for you, so this just needs to stop. Sure, he is capable of making his own sandwich just like you are capable of buying your own fucking shoes.

When you put a man down, especially your exes, how attractive do you think that is to a man. If you are trash talking an ex, that probably means you are single. Do you really think any man wants to be next on that list? Do you really think you are going to find a good man by doing that? I mean really, when you hear a guy talking shit about a woman, especially an ex, what does that make YOU think of him? Take a moment and think about that...EXACTLY!!!!! that's what he is thinking about you. Not too smart ladies, you're fucking yourselves on this one. An ex, is an ex, because they are history so stop making them the present and get over it!

To sum this all up, a lot of you ladies are the cause of your own problems. You say you can't find the things in part 2 and by say, i mean complain and bitch about it. meanwhile not one of the things in part one, has anything to do with what's in part 2. You make no sense to me at all lol If you ask for the things in part 1, that's what you are going to get. Start asking for the things in part 2. Part 2 should be the things you look for first. Part 3 are all the reasons why. Lastly, if you don't see the problems here and you don't agree, there is something very wrong with you and I don't feel sorry for you that you are unhappy in life and can't find the things in part 2!

If I had a dollar for every time a girl said to me: "He's so mean to me, I am so unhappy, why can't he just... I don't know what to do, BUT he does have a big dick *giggle*" I'd be a fucking millionaire!

Now ladies, I am one of you, I love you all but I had to do this. I can't take listening to your bullshit any more. Since I have to hear you cunts bitch and cry, you're going to have to hear me tell you how it's your own fault. If you don't like what i have to say, it's because you know i am right. Get over it and get over yourself. You ladies are making "women" look bad. It needs to end now. I cringe when I think that some of you are or will be raising Daughters. I hope they don't turn out like you. They deserve to be happy. Set a good example and smarten up!

One last thing. I am thankful to know a bunch of women who are not like what I have described above. This is not directed to all women. Man or woman, whether you like this or not, we ALL know what I am saying is true. Also, in no way am I saying that men aren't fucked up in their beliefs and ways too. I may post about that in the future. I wrote about women today, mostly because I am one of them and I am insulted and offended that I am grouped in and viewed as being like most women.

No Bake Pumpkin Pie Cheesecake!

2011-11-22T13:49:00.000-08:00

I have been making this pie for years and years. Everyone loves it! It is a fan favorite lol It used to be me who always made it every year. Now I have several friends who make it on their own. Today my favorite Sister in law called me to go over the recipe, like she does every year since she started making it on her own ;) She reminded me that maybe I should post it to my blog, so I can share it with the rest of you.

It is a pretty easy pie to make. I use the easy pumpkin (the one with the spices already in it) I just like the taste better and it's less ingredients and steps. You can make this pie for under $10. If you plan ahead and follow sales and use coupons, well you know, it'll be a lot cheaper. Sorry I am so late with this seeing as Thanksgiving is in 2 days. It's really a good pie for the whole season. Most people think this pie is a weird combo and I did too, until I tasted it. Sooo GOOD!!

http://www.kraftrecipes.com/recipes/double-layer-pumpkin-pie-54636.aspx

Food Lion's MVP Big Deal Promotion Got Me $63 Worth Of Groceries For Only $24.40

2011-10-25T11:58:00.000-07:00

Most of you won't be familiar with the grocery store Food Lion. Those of you who are, know that they are not the best store to get great deals on a regular basis. They do run some great sales here and there. This month they were running their big deal promotion. If you buy 10 participating items, you get $5 off your bill instantly at the register. Buy 20 items, get $10 off, buy 30 items, get $15 off. I did my best to buy only things we needed and as many things I could with matching coupons. I got everything in the pic below for $24.40. They are worth about a total of $63!

Here is the list of the items and quantities I bought:
1 box Frosted Flakes
1 box Special K
4 boxes Cheerios
12 Yoplait Greek yogurts
2 boxes Eggo Waffles
4 boxes Pillsbury Toaster Strudels
6 Single Rolls Brawny papaer towel

The retail price for these items are:
Frosted Flakes $3.29
Special K $3.29
Cheerios $3.89 (4 boxes) $15.56
Yoplait Greek 5/$5 (12) $12.00
Eggo Waffles $2.59 (2 boxes) $5.18
Toaster Strudel $2.59 (4 boxes) $10.36
Paper Towel $1.50 (6) $9.00

Total if I paid retail $59.38 + tax

The sale prices were:
Frosted Flakes $3.00
Special K $2.50
Cheerios $2.50 (4) $10.00
Yoplait Greek 5/$5 (12) $12.00
Eggo Waffles 2/$4 (2) $4
Toaster Strudel 2/$4 (4) $8.00
Paper Towel 10/$10 (6) $6.00

Total if I paid just sale prices $43.50 + tax

I had the following coupons:
$1 off 2 boxes of Kellogg's cereals (Frosted Flakes and Special K)
(2) $1 off 2 boxes of Cheerios
(6) 50 cent of 2 Yoplait Greek (Food Lion doesn't double Q's either...booo)
(2) 50 cent off 2 boxes of Toaster Strudel

Total in coupons $7

So I can deduct the $7 in coupons and the $15 off instantly cause I bought 30 participating items. $22 off the $43.50 sale prices before tax
Total $21.50 + tax = $24.40

Now in the coupon world, that makes each item about 82 cents!!!!!

Some Great Steals And Deals From The Past Few Weeks

2011-10-24T11:44:00.000-07:00

Dollar General has has summer toys on clearance for a few weeks now. I got a bunch of stuff that i didn't take pics of when the sale was 50% off. Then I got a few more things at 70% off. I picked up a few more at 90% off too. I love sales like this because I can pick up some random toys for Isabella. I often hide them and save them for a distraction. Some of them, especially the outdoor summer toys, come in very handy when we take the girls to the playground for afternoon playdates or when us Moms want to walk the track at the elementary school.

@ 70% off, I got everything in the pic below for $4+ I lost my receipt so I can't remember what the change was. Reatil would have been about $19.00

The chalk and garden sets were a great buy because they are things that can be used year round, inside and outside! Isabella loves to use small watering cans in the tub!

@ 90% off I got the 2 fishing pole sets and kite strings for $1.07 Retail would have been $10.60
She loves these fishing poles for the tub too! The kite string comes in handy for things around the house so for me, that's a great buy too.
Notice the bottom of the receipt, there is a survey and a $5 off a $25 purchase. I do these surveys almost everytime I get one and the $5 off coupons come in handy, especiall when matched with sales and coupons. Always check your receipts!!

All in all I got $20 worth of toys for less than $6!

Next up,Walgreens! Oh how I just love Walgreens. We were out of Ester-C, something that 3 of us in my house take daily. It's pretty expensive right off the shelf. I can usually always find a $1, $2 or $3 off coupon. Walgreens, CVS and Rite-Aid run regular sales on Ester-C @ B1G1, I always stock up as much as I can when it's on sale!
I had (2) $2off coupons (remember you can use 2 coupons on the B1G1 sale because each rings up separate. When I got to the store, the larger bottles of 1,000 mg had a coupon on the box for $3 off...NICE!!!
They sell 2 different kinds, a 90 count bottle of 1,000 mg @ $14.99 and a 104 count bottle of 500 mg for $10.99
So right off the bat, I could get 2 bottles of 1,000 mg for $14.99 making them $7.49 each. Match it with my $3off coupons and they become $4.49 each, that's already a savings of $10.48 per bottle! That's all well and good but it get's better. Walgreen's also had maxi pads and razors on sale, both of which are needed in this house. The pads were Walgreen's brand ultra thin maxi pads 18 count for $2 with $2 RR (register rewards) back. The razors were shcick hydro 3 or 5 started kit or 4 pack of hyro 3 or 5 cartridges. Both on sale for $8.49 with $4.50 RR back. I had coupons for the razor and cartridges, $2 off razor and $2 off cartridges.

DAY #1 I did 2 seperate transaction at the same time. I bought the maxi's and razor cartridges, it came to $9.20 and I got $6.50 RR back. a $2 RR and a $4.50 RR
Next I bought the Ester-C and coke. I had to purchase 2 more items with the Ester-C beacuse I was planning on using 4 coupons and Walgreens coupon policy is 1 coupon per item, so with 4 coupons, I needed 4 items. The RR's count as coupons. The coke was on sale 2 for $3. I could have bought a 10 cent filler item but we needed the coke, well, my husband needed it lol. So The total before sales and coupons would have been $33 and change. Take off $14.99 for the B1G1 Eater-C, $6.00 thanks to the (2) $3 off Ester-C coupons and the $6.50 in RR's which is a toatl of $27.50 off the $33 total. So I ended up paying $6.70!

So on day #1 I spent $15.90 out of pocket for $50 worth of stuff. Stuff that was NEEDED!

DAY #2
I bought a razor and the maxi pads again. $9.20 out of pocket, $6.50 RR back
They only had the $10.99 bottles of ester-c 500 mg so I had to get those. I had (2) $2 off coupons
I also bought Orbitz gum on sale (2) 3 packs for $5 and I had a $1off/(2) 3 pks. coupon.
I also bought a half gal of milk $2.49 and 2 halloween plastic cups for Isabella 13 cents each
I needed the milk and gum but I could have just bought the cups to give me 2 more items so I could use my 4 coupons again. The Total before sales and coupons would be $32. I only paid $8.94! That's a savings of $27!! I got a rain check for the big bottle of ester-c so I can get more when they have it back in stock...always get your rain checks!

So on day #2 I spent $18.16 for $43 worth of stuff!

DAY #3
I bought another pkg of maxi pads. $2 with $2 RR back and colgate sensitive toothpaste $4.99 with $3 RR back. I had a $1 off coupon for toothpaste. I paid $6.46 and got $5 RR back.
I didn't pay cash though. I got a walgreens gift card in the mail for $22 from a rebate I did a while back!

Day #4
I bought Theramax cold and flu nasal spray. $7.99 with $8 RR back, which makes it free! I also bought a trial size of scotch reusable sticky tabs to hang stuff like posters for 10 cents and a pkg of balloons 100pk for 40 cents, both on clearance. I could have just bout the 10 cent tape just so I had 2 items so I could use 2 coupons but i wanted the balloons too! I used my $2 and my $3 RR. The total came to $3.98 (I used gift card) and I got $8 RR back. That's a $4 profit! Now if they get the ester-c back in stock soon, I will use the (2) $3 off coupons and my $8 RR which will be $14 off . If I buy 2 bottles and 2 cheap filler items, I can get it all, $30+ worth of stuff for less than $2. Did I meantion that I love Walgreens!

In less than 2 weeks, I bought about $141 worth of stuff for $50!!! Nice!

My next post will be how I got over $50 worth of groceries for $24.40.....stay tuned. I love this deal!

I Am The Parent Of A Special Needs Child

2011-10-11T14:08:00.000-07:00

I am starting this post with a note I wrote and posted on facebook at the beginning of this year. I know some of you have already read it. I also know that I will repeat some of this info in the last part of my post. It was just easier for me to do it that way!

Facebook note:
When Isabella was about 1 I started to notice that she just wasn't developing like she should. It wasn't long before I knew it was more than a kid who was just slower getting to those targets and milestones. She didn't walk when she should have, even crawled weird. She would rather pull herself with her arms than get up on her knees. Then she wasn't saying mama or Dada or baba and she had odd behaviors. It would take me a novels worth of words to lay all the details out so I am just leaving most of them out here. I was always forth coming with the Dr. and he was like "it's ok for now but let's keep an eye on it" He was most worried about her speech. Time went on with little improvement so he set up a speech evaluation.....then we lost out medical benefits and couldn't afford it on our own (still can't so we have to self pay in full out of pocket every time) so the Dr. said "well, we can put it off a bit" so we did. Her speech improved and she seemed to be progressing but still slow. As she grew, new problems arose. You have all seen my pics and read my stories of some of this stuff....well you can multiply that by at least 100 and that is how it really is. The climbing, getting into things she shouldn't and everything in between. We would take her to a playground (or anywhere) and she didn't care about the toys, she just wanted to run away from us hysterically laughing and I don't mean run around...I mean RUNNNNNNNNNNN out into the street or out of a gate or into the woods, she didn't care. Going to the grocery store with her could induce suicide and I am not kidding. I would love to see anyone try to get her into a cart without breaking her leg. I kind of force her into the back where the groceries go cause she won't sit in the part where kids should go and then practically lay on top of her to keep her in as I start sprinting through the store begging her to be quiet and bribing her to please sit still. If she can reach something she will throw it on the floor so I have to make sure she is far enough from everything. I can't use the basket either cause she will throw shit out of it so I use the bottom and hand basket if I have to. She will throw her shoes too so I usually have to take them off. She tries to climb out every chance she can.Sometimes she thinks this is funny so it's like a game and laughing and the other times it's like a tantrum and there is no laughter and it's not a game for sure. If it's a good day and she wants to shop she will sing as loud as possible and do the "echo...echo..." cause she loves to hear herself. She thinks it's all funny too. Either way, no one in the store thinks it's funny. People have been so rude to me I almost cannot believe it told me I should leave, they guess I can't make her be quiet, she should be sitting (not standing) in the cart etc. etc. I have been asked to leave the library and no joke I only went in, walked up to the desk, got my book that was on hold and was checking it out and the lady said "do you want to come back? No bitch, I don't, cause she's gonna be like this every time and we are 4 fucking seconds away from walking out the door any way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I didn't say that mind you I just said no and that was it. One of the most horrific things for me that she does is scream "Help, stop, don't, I'm hurt, I'm sick, I'm stuck, no, please, don't, HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" all of it, at once over and over. She does this everywhere in public, like the library and grocery store but TWICE in front of the police. Once I had to pay a speeding ticket at the court house and right around the corner from the metal detector where all the cops are. I told her we had to wait and stay here and I was holding her on the little counter in front of the clerks window and she screams all that while we are in an intense struggle for her to get away from me and I turn my head and the cops are looking around the corner. The second time, we were at the police station pressing charges on that kid Anthony had a fight with and she starts doing it again! You can imagine I am sure, the horror that would be right? She doesn't stay in her car seat. Everything in my house is on secure lock down. I have had to remove so many things from and put them in locked rooms cause she will destroy them. I have more gates than anyone I have ever know, they have been zip tied and arranged so many diff ways lol as pics have shown, we even made a cage once for around the wood stove but she just learned to climb over and into it. She is like Houdini. Then there was the time she learned how to open doors. I planned to get locks or door knob covers on my next trip to the store but within a few days she got out of the house. Joe was in the shower, I was getting her bath ready and Tyson had left muddy paw prints in the tub. I had to use cleaner so I had to shut the door or she would get into whatever in the bathroom or the cleaner. I cleaned the bottom of the tub only, it was 3 min tops and when I came out she was gone. I noticed the door to our garage was open, I ran out and the door to outside was open. I ran out into the driveway screaming her name, I hear nothing (and she didn't answer to her name when you called her anyway, not with words) I see nothing. We live in the woods in all directions, I was spinning around in the worst panic I have even felt and I am thinking...which way do I go???? I ran back to the house screaming for Anthony, we both go out running and calling her. I see a car coming down the street and I want to stop her and ask if she's seen her but as she approaches, I see Isabella on her lap. I couldn't speak, I was gasping for breath, she handed her to me out the window and then got out and hugged me saying, it's ok, she's ok are you ok? I could only nod and she told me that she had run 3/4 of the way down our street...towards the main road. My neighbor (Carl) snatched her up as the other (Crystal) was driving towards Isabella. So she drove her home to me. Isabella was barefoot, it was dusk, cold and rainy and she didn't have a mark on her. I put her in the tub just as Joe got out of the shower I told him quick what happened and walked away. I went into our bathroom and puked and cried and just broke down in sobs like I never have. I have been scared many times in my life but never have I felt pure terror like I did that day. She has broke our TV, our toilet A light bulb, glass and everything in between.

So when I started taking her to the family place, they had people come in and talk all the time about services in the community. One place was called the hand in hand program and they screen and evaluate for learning disabilities. I was reluctant for a short bit before I decided to do it. Turns out she is developmentally delayed. That's their official diagnosis. She does have characteristics of autism but very few. Also a few characteristics of ADHD. Their services are free and they give 14 kids in our county grants to go to a preschool for "special needs" kids. Isabella got one of those grants and had been going half and 3/4 days since August. She has made significant progress already. They feel like she she will be on target by the time she is ready for kindergarten. If she is not or does not progress at any time, she will be evaluated again. She has an I.E.P ( individualized education plan) so they do things dif for her than the other kids. One of the things being picture cards. Isabella doesn't like to comply and/or it takes her a few mins to adjust to what is going on or a transition. It's kinda like snooze on your alarm clock. LOL So they have pictures like a calm face and the group circle and when she sees them, she says "calm down, it's time for group" and in her mind it's like she is deciding, she is not being told. It works well and we use it at home to.

So all and all things are improving but 1 bad day can just break me. Raising her in general has been the hardest thing I have ever done. It's exhausting, it's soooooo frustrating and stressful. When she started school, it was the first time in 3 years that I had spent one moment....yes one single moment in my house without her with me. Trying to get anything done until then was just not even possible most times. Now with her in school it's almost impossible to get her to get ready, get dressed, get in the car, take a bath, eat, or whatever on time and it's just very overwhelming. It's like she's a full time job from 6-7 and I still have a full time job of home maker to do from 7-6 and then there is the rest of life on top of all this.For me the hardest part is that I do lose my patience and yell and snap out and it's not pretty sometimes. Sometimes I am just like "how am I going to get through this day, how much more can I take" I feel horrible because I know it's like "not her fault" I don't have a bad kid, she just can't do some of the things she needs to be doing. I know everyone will say that I am only human and all and yeah, I feel that way too but what kind of person would I be if I didn't feel guilty about it ya know? I AM doing my best, there is no doubt in my mind about that. There are a lot of power struggles and "negative" times and I hate that. I want to have fun with her, she's my Daughter. I can't do the same things that other people can with their kids. I can't even enjoy her sometimes. It's rough.

So there you have it (most of it anyway LOL)

Current post:
In June 2011, Isabella finished her first full year of school. She had met all goals set for her. Her behavior had improved dramatically. Over the summer, she made even more improvements. We had her potty trained, with only pull-ups at night. I was able to take her places, playdates, playgrounds, public places and most importantly, shopping. She actually really likes going to the store. There were very little outbursts in public and even less at home. She was no longer this huge disruption to our lives, hers included. I was getting everything in order and back on track. Life became manageable and that was really more than I could ask for. A huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. She was however a bit bored at home and didn't really seem to understand why she couldn't go to school. When the new school year began in August, she seemed so happy to be going back. A few weeks into the beginning of school, all hell broke loose.

Her school is a preschool for special needs kids. So 5 years old is the max age. Last year the majority of kids in her class were at the tail end of their "treatment" so they were very well behaved with little to no issues remaining. Isabella was just starting her treatment and although she had some issues, she pretty much fell into place. The other kids seemed to be good behavior role models. There were only a couple of kids still having a hard time or outbursts and poor behavior. One of the kids was also new and just starting, like Isabella so they were on the same level. This year, most of the kids are younger and/or just starting out in the school. Isabella and another boy are the only kids that were also at the school last year. One of the teachers is new. There are quite a few kids who are really having a hard time. It's still all new to them and they are having trouble adjusting. There are a lot of outbursts and "bad" behaviors. The first 2 weeks of school had passed with no problems. Isabella seemed to be falling right back into place. Then all of the sudden she starting acting in up school. She then started acting up at home. Some of her behaviors were old ones and some were very new. Things she had never done before, things that had never been an issue. I stayed on top of it and talked at length with her teachers about it. We all seem to agree that we think she is regressing due to all the changes in her class. We also think that she is feeding off of the behaviors of the other kids. Behaviors that she really wasn't subjected to as much last year. We are in agreement that this is most likely a phase. We hope that it's just a phase and that she will adjust in time and fall back into place and be back on track. It's been over a month since this all began and it doesn't really seem to be getting any better. Nap time has been very difficult for her. Some days she lays right down and falls asleep with a little help. Some days she doesn't want to nap but she will stay on her cot and read or do a quiet activity. Nap time is from 1-3. Even last year she wouldn't nap the whole time so I had to pick her up everyday at 2, because once she woke up, she had a hard time staying quiet and it was disruptive to the other children who were trying to sleep. Recently she has been refusing to lay down and will not stay on her cot or be quiet for that matter. She starts screaming and carrying on and is extremely disruptive during that time. Last week they informed me that if her behavior didn't improve, that I may have to start picking her up at 12:30, after lunch and before nap time. Friday I was on my way into town to do the weekly grocery shopping and they called me and asked me to pick her up. She was out of control, throwing a tantrum. She is no longer able to stay for nap time at least for a while. They hope they can work on the other kids and get them adjusted and then bring Isabella back in slowly as time goes on.

This news was a little heart breaking for me, as it directly impacts my daily life in several negative ways. I know I am repeating myself a bit here with these details so bare with me. We live about 20+ miles from "town" where all the stores are for grocery shopping etc. Her school is also in town so I have to drive there and back twice a day. This year they decided to change the schools start time from 8:15 to 8:30. 8:15 was already an inconvenience for me, 8:30 is a huge inconvenience. I have to drop my son off at 7:45, his school is about half the distance from home to Isabella's school. So I leave at about 7:30-ish. I drop him off and then I have 30-45 min till I can drop her off. I was running a quick errand every morn to kill time which worked out, until she started acting up again. Now taking her to the store is not pleasant in any way. Also I don't always have an errand to run so I take the long way or drive a bit further and go back to her school JUST to kill time. Since we are so far from her school, my weekly gas bill is already about $80+ which isn't easy for us to pull off on our income. She also was getting picked up at 2 and my son doesn't get out until 3 so again I would have to leave at 1:30 to pick her up and then do something to kill that hour gap till I had to get Anthony. I can't afford to drive back home either in the morn or the afternoon. I have a friend with a Daughter Isabella's age who met up with me several days a week at a local playground for playdates to kill that hour. I was losing 4 hours of my day just dropping off and picking up my kids at school. Every week I planned my shopping around school hours since I have to drive all the way to town to shop. I can't afford to make one more trip into town just for shopping. I had to make sure I did it when I was already in town. Now that I have to pick her up at 12:30, my days will go like this: Leave at 7:45, drop off both kids, get home by 9am. Then I walk with friends every morn for 1.5-2 hours so I am done by 11 at the latest. I will then have 1 hour till I have to leave to pick her up. Then I have to drive all the way back home, we will be home by 1pm. Then I have 2 hours till I have to go back out to pick Anthony up. This leads to an extra trip back home, it's like an extra 14+ miles a day. That's gonna cost me money for gas that we just don't even have right now. I have no idea how I am going to pull this all off.

Life with a special needs child isn't easy. Being a parent and mostly sole caregiver to one is so difficult. With Isabella, I never know when she will act up. from one minute to the next, I have no idea what to expect. The simplest task can become a nightmare in an instant. Even though she loves school, for a while she would cry and carry on when I would drop her off. This is something she never did before, not even once. She would beg me to bring her home. I had to walk away and leave her crying and fighting the teachers. It killed me inside but I wouldn't show that to her. She will pick up on your weakness and take full advantage of it. Every day I told her, I was giving her one kiss and saying goodbye one time and then I had to leave, whether she was crying or not. This went on for a couple of weeks but she seems to be back to her normal self with the morning routine. I drop her off with ease the last 2 weeks or so and she just says bye and kisses me without a care in the world, just like she always had. I hope it stays that way. When I pick her up, she would be so excited to go to the playground. She would go on and on about how she was gonna see her friend Kyra and play on the slide etc. We would get there and she would have a blast. Then 2 weeks or so ago, she started throwing a fit when I would pick her up, she didn't want to leave school. A few days it took me 10-20 min just to get her in the car and get her in her carseat. She would be screaming "No mommy, no playground. I don't like it, take me back to school" Then she would calm down and we'd be off to the playground like nothing ever happened. Other days she would be fine about leaving and she's be excited to go to the playground, until we got there. We would pull in the parking lot and she would just flip out. She would scream about how she didn't want to go, she wanted to go back home etc. I can't afford to take her back home. We have no choice but to go to the playground. Eventually she would settle down and then she'd play and have fun, again, as if nothing ever happened. The other day after she settled down, she was still acting up by taking her friends toys and running away laughing. She climbed the fence trying to get out of the playground several times. Sometimes when we pull into our driveway she doesn't want to be home, she wants to go back to school, or back to the playground. She refuses to get out of the car. I have to leave her in there for a few min till she settles down, then she comes in the house as happy as can be, again like nothing ever happened. Transitions have always been an area she has been delayed in and had difficulties with but never have they been this bad. She has taken it to new levels of impossible. In the moment, I try my hardest to stay calm with her. If I feed into it one bit or lose my cool, it will turn a 15 min battle into a half hour of misery for both of us. It's not easy and I am not always able to keep my cool as well as I'd like to.

Potty training has been another area where she has regressed. It's one of the only areas where I have given in. I know how to pick my battles and this is one I can afford to give up on. Sometimes she wears underwear and sometimes she won't. If she wants to wear a pull-up, I let her. There are too many other things that I refuse to give in on. One of those is getting her to stay in her carseat. Sometimes she stays in without one problem. Other times, I have to pull over 5 times to put her back in her seat. It can turn a 15 min drive into a half hour trip. Not to mention it's very frustrating while I am trying to drive. She has started name calling and talking back. This is also something she has never done. Yesterday as she was getting out of her carseat, I told her if she did, I was pulling over, she screamed at me to "hush mommy" and told me "I going to kill you" I was horrified. She has never been hateful or spoke to me like that and I have no idea where she even learned "kill you" from. She has been feeding the dog things like paper, tissues, toilet paper, candy, her dinner, any and all of her food and snacks, a whole bag of popcorn the other day. She doesn't try to hide it either, she comes and tells me if she hadn't done it right in front of my face. Then she praises him and tells me what a good job she did. In the tub, she has been splashing and throwing water, refusing to stand up and get washed. She been throwing things when she gets mad. Yesterday when I picked her up at school, she had refused to even sit at the table for lunch so she didn't even eat. She has also gone back to acting up in public and throwing a fit in any store I bring her into. On Friday when I had to pick her up early, I was on my way to do the weekly grocery shopping. Since I can't afford to add another trip into town to shop and it was the end of the school week, I had no choice but to bring her with me. I had a 50/50 chance of things going well. I had to go to 3 different stores. The first was walmart. I only had to get 5 things. She flipped out as soon as we walked in. She screamed and cried about how she didn't want to go. She tore down a display of pet hair mitts to brush your pet that was hanging from the shelf. I had to pick up and rehang about 20 mitts. She was so loud that a friend of mine was in the store too and she heard her and knew it was her so she came to say hello, she located us just by following the screaming. I made it through that store and was on to the next. Her behavior was worse in the second store. I honestly thought I was going to just have to leave. People were starring and giving me dirty looks AS USUAL! At one point we strolled by sponge bob cheese nips and she begged me for them. I thought it might help so I got them and put them under the cart where I have to put everything, cause she throws anything she can get her hands on out of the cart. She asked me if she could have the box and she had calmed down a bit so I gave them to her, she threw them out and laughed about it. she was trying to pull things off the shelf. I have to keep the cart in the middle of the isle and make sure we are not near a display. She saw some kids (walking nicely holding hands with their parents and behaving) she was talking to them and saying hello but as soon as they went one way and we went another, she started screaming "No mommy, go that way, go back to those kids" I tried my usual trick of telling her she could play that game/machine where you grab a stuffed animal and try to get it into the drop box, she loves that game and this usually works well for me. It did not work at all this time and so we left both stores with her screaming even worse when she realized I was not going to let her play it and I didn't. She was better behaved in the third store. Not good but it wasn't as bad. I can't take her to many places, like birthday parties, restaurants (she also has food allergies and we never eat out anyway) the library, or any other place that is kid friendly. She doesn't do well yet in these situations.

Going through the struggles I do with her has made me realize just how ignorant, judgemental, disgraceful and sad people in this world are. I have never in my life been looked at the way people look at me in public when she is having an outburst. 90% of these adult humans just assume that I am a bad parent of a misbehaved child. I know this because they tell me with the ugly faces of disgust I get. For the most part I pay them no mind but it hurts my feeling all the same. They make me feel more embarrassed then she does. Some of them even comment and are extremely rude about it too. It takes everything I have left in me to not slap them right in the face. They have no idea why my kid is behaving like this, there is no way for them to know. I can remember as a young kid seeing parents in stores with out of control kids and even then I would give them a kind smile. Even then I felt bad for them and couldn't imagine what it was like. I would see other people giving them the looks that I now get and even then I knew it wasn't nice. I knew all of this because I am a compassionate, non judgemental KID who never assumed anything of anyone. Some people do give me a kind look or say something kind to me. I have even had people come up to me that saw someone give me a look or say something to me and tell me how wrong that person was. It's those people that I take the time to say, my Daughter has special needs and it's hard for her to be in public. After this last incident, I have decided to do something radical, something that I have thought about doing many times. If her behavior in public doesn't improve soon. I am going to make a sign that I will either wear or hang on my shopping cart. That sign will read something to the effect of: "My 4 year old Daughter may scream and throw a tantrum while we are in this store. If I don't take her in public she will never learn how to act right in public. Many of you will stare and give me dirty looks, or say something rude to us. Her behavior is due to developmental delays and being a child with special needs. What's your excuse for your behavior??"

I'd like to add that children who are autistic, developmentally delayed, have sensory disorders, behavioral problems, ADD, ADHD and so many others. These kids look "normal" from all appearances, they don't seem to have anything wrong with them. I think society is hardest on them. They judge a book by it's cover. They see a kid who looks like any other and just assume that they are bad. If a kid who had down syndrome was in the store, they would take one look and know that child had down syndrome. With kids like Isabella, this isn't so. I learned not to judge a book by it's cover when I was a child. Anyone who still doesn't as an adult or in this day and age is just plain ignorant and me and Isabella or any parent or child like us shouldn't have to suffer the consequences of your ignorance and your actions because of it.

This brings me to the people who aren't just some asshole strangers. The people who know us, even family and friends. I have been told I should smack her, punish her, give her time outs. I have been told I am not doing anything about her behaviors (I'll get to why next) I have been asked why is she like that? I have been told I am too easy on her that I give in too much. People have said how they wouldn't "put up" with that type of behavior from their kids or any kid. I can't tell you how angry this makes me. I mean she has issues, delays, problems, struggles, etc and whatever you want to call them. I wonder and often ask these people: "If she were blind and couldn't tell you what color something was, would you punish her for that? If she were deaf and couldn't hear what you said to her, would you smack her for it? Give her a time out perhaps? Would you "put up" with that behavior. I am doing the very best I can. No one gave me a rule book or directions to raising a child with special needs. I go mostly by what the experts tell me. I get, ask, search for and take any advice I can from the people who have been educated in dealing with children like Isabella. People who deal with children like her everyday. Her teachers and therapists etc. I also use my own judgement as her parent, the one who deals with her all day every day.

Before we got her evaluated and into this school, I was pretty much at a loss as to what to do, how to handle her, how to manage her behaviors. I was doing all the things I had done with my Son and all the other kids I'd cared for over the years. My view on discipline is different than most peoples in the first place. That will be another blog topic of it's own. I am not big on spanking and I have and will spank my child if I feel they need it. Usually there's not really a reason that a spanking is needed, it's usually dome because I lose my cool. I don't think it's the end of the world to spank your kid. I just don't think it's effective. It's less effective with Isabella. She thinks it's funny and often asks to be smacked or if you ask her if she needs a smack she says "yes" I learned way before I was introduced to this program that Isabella lives for reactions of any kind, good or bad. If she does something that makes you laugh, she loves it and tries her hardest to make you laugh again. If she does something that makes you angry, she loves that even more and will do "bad" things to get you to the point of anger. Even when I yell at the dog, she thinks it's the funniest things she has ever seen. She will often be bad for no other reason besides getting a reaction out of me. She loves any kind of emotion even, again, good or bad. Even though I already knew this, I didn't know how much my disciplining her was actually feeding into her behavior and often causing her to act worse. I thought that I HAD to do something discipline wise to gain control of her actions and behaviors. WRONG! Distracting her from the behaviors. Ignoring the behaviors. Showing little or no emotion and having little or no reaction. These are all what is considered a punishment in her mind. Her pay off is the reaction. If she climbs the counter and I come around the corner and see her and gasp out of fear, just that gasp is like a reward for her. So that day she may climb the counter 20 times to try to get me to react in the same way. She even tells me to gasp when she can't get me to do it. If I just see her on the counter, show no emotion and just pick her up and put her on the floor. Then with little emotion say "It's very dangerous to climb on the counter If you climb up there again, I will take such and such away" or something to that effect. I have to use whatever she sees as valuable at that moment. She may still climb the counter that day in hopes of a gasp but it may only be 5 times instead of 20. Once she realizes what she's doing is working, the behavior stops. When we were at the playground and she climbed the fence, of course that was really dangerous and I had to run from one side of the playground to the other where she was. I had no choice but to run or she would have been over that fence before I got there. Just me running had her in hysterics and she kept telling me to run and laughing. She takes things she knows she is not supposed to have and she takes off running and laughing just to get you to chase her. This is all difficult because there are those times where I can't help but react, either because I have to or because I can't control myself or forget. Once she gets the reaction once, it's hard for her to forget it and let it go. Time outs don't work because she gets up on purpose so you will go get her and out her back. Lots of times she will have her eyes right on you the whole time she is about to and while doing something she shouldn't. She's even got a smile on her face, just waiting for you to react to it. So what they have taught me is that it's ok to ignore her, it's what needs to be done in her case. Unless of course in those times when it can't be ignored for safety reasons for instance. I have to stay calm and not show any emotion, she doesn't like it one bit.

Just getting through an average day is rough and has become even worse in the last month. It's near impossible to get chores done, cook a meal, get to where we need to go and get there on time. I can't take her many places. her behaviors take up a great deal of time, time that really needs to be spent on something else. I end up with not many choices. I have to deal with her before I can get to other things. If she starts acting up, I have to stop what I am doing to deal with her. I have burnt a few dinners and forgot many many things that I really needed to remember. I have had to let a lot of things go, such as cleaning my house and doing other chores, simply because there isn't enough time in a day. Things pile up on me quickly and it's very stressful. It makes me feel as if I have no control over my own home. In actuality I have complete control over it. I could chose to stay up late and mop the floors. I could choose to burn myself out just to get it all done. I don't though. Instead I choose to deal with what is most important. I choose to do what must be done and let the rest go. I chose to go for a walk every morning even though I know my house is a mess. I choose to take care of myself and make sure I have what I need in life. I choose to do that because I know how important it is for me to be in tip top shape for I am the one who has to deal with most of the stress this life has dished out on me. I refuse to forget about me, I refuse to let this all get the best of me and beat me down. I know how easy it would be for that to happen. Even when I am taking care of myself, I still feel like any moment could be the last moment of my sanity.

When I posted my first note about Isabella and her issues on facebook, I got a mixed bag of comments. Some peopled applauded me for putting it out there, for sharing. Some people thanked me for making them feel like they are not the only ones with a chaotic life. I was also thanked for admitting that I lose my cool and I am not always perfect. I was praised for being so dedicated and so involved with Isabella. I was also chastised for putting it out there, for airing my dirty laundry. I was even asked why I would write that and post it publicly...by a family member. I posted a copy and paste facebook status about autism awareness day, which in it's quote added children with special needs and sensory disorders. I was asked why I posted that if Isabella is not autistic. Some people obviously read that whole paragraph and only really saw the word autistic. That person was also a family member. That showed me their ignorance but worse it showed me shame. None of those things would have been said to me if there wasn't some shame on their parts to have a child with special needs in their family. Since I don't have time nor would I take the time if I had it to deal with the ignorance of some people, those people have been cut out of our lives. Family or not, I really couldn't care less. I care about how people treat me and my children and I don't care who you are, if you treat me badly enough times, you can consider your self dead to me. I can't have negative influences in my life or the lives of my husband and children.

I have also realized through the response of others, that my ability to be so open about this and any other parts of my life seem to be rare. That is just so sad to me. People are actually reluctant for many reasons to stand up and say HI. my name is Melissa, I am the parent of a special needs child and it's not easy and my life is a mess because of it. Really??? Like it's socially unacceptable to have a child that is not "normal" Like it's a family secret that should stay a secret and not be talked about. I would write this and tell the world on any given day about the good and the bad, because it's the kind of person I am, open and not ashamed or fearful. However now I feel like it's my duty of sorts to say it. I feel like more of us should come forward and tell our stories, blurt out the horror of it all. I promise you, that you will be relieved. I promise you that it will open the door for a neighbor or old friend or stranger to say hey, me too!. If more of us came forward and talked about these issues, it would educate the ignorant and maybe people would think twice before they talk shit about me in the grocery store.

I realize this post is extremely long. It needed to be in order for me to get most of it out. I know I am leaving things out but I wanted to get the basics down so I can update you all with shorter posts without having to give the background of it all over and over. I also realize how all over the place this post is. I am going to edit it and spell check it to some degree but I am not going out of my way to make it perfect. It's 4pm and I started this blog at 9am. I had to stop twice to get both kids and half the time I was writing jumbled and all over the place, well, it's a perfect representation of my reality.

I would like to end on 2 happy notes:

The first is Isabella herself. This whole post has been about her negative side but that is not her only side. She is absolutely beautiful. She is extremely intelligent and above average as far as academics are concerned. She is very compassionate and picks up on peoples feelings really well. She is extremely giving and thoughtful. She is hilarious and a goof and very silly and she can brighten a room with happiness just as well as she can bring it down with disorder. She's not really afraid of anything, she's a risk taker and seems to love danger and thrills. She is very loving and loves to cuddle and hug and be rubbed or tickled. She loves affection, LOVES IT and she is very affectionate. She is musically gifted and impresses me with her musical talents. She is unbelievably coordinated. She can play video games and games on the computer and navigate on the computer like no kid I have ever seen that is her age. She is really a joy to be around a lot of the time. She is so strong in these traits that most people who meet her just adore her, instantly.

last but certainly not least, I would like to say that I am blessed with many family members, close friends, online friends and strangers who have been understanding of my situation. They have praised me a job well done in raising her. They are there for me when I need to vent, cry scream or laugh at the chaos that is my life. They have given me the support that is very much needed to survive this kind of life. Most importantly they love Isabella with all of their heart and unconditionally. I am both grateful and thankful to have people like that in my life. I couldn't do it as well as I do without all of their support. You all know who you are.