DreamBuilders Ministry in Motion Blog

Measuring Transformation

2008-10-09T00:17:00.002-04:00

In a recent interview at the Hillsong Conference (June 5,2008), in Sydney Australia, pastor Bill Hybels discussed church growth. One of the golden nuggets from this discussion w/ Pastor Brian Houston was the idea that sometimes ministers confuse church size with spiritual growth of our church members. According to Hybels, a transformational church’s success is measured by its effectiveness of the latter, not the former.

How long has it been since you stepped back and asked “What do I use to measure the effectiveness of my church / ministry?” A successful church will grow. Pursuing Christ’s command to make disciples must intrinsically include increasing numbers of members. However, increasing numbers does not mean that people are becoming disciples, being transformed and released into ministry. Yet the church’s call is to form the life of Christ within another life . . . to see individuals transformed.

So how do you measure your effectiveness of your church? Being and becoming a Christ centered, transformational, spiritual maturing church is a matter of being focused on the right goal, using the right measuring stick, asking the right questions.

Willow Creek Church and Willow Resources have recently published “Reveal:” an online study in which your church can participate. Reveal measures the spiritual temperature within your ministry. This cutting edge study was built over 4 years, on the contributions of 200 churches, and 80,000 participants. The Reveal study zeros in on spiritual continuum of a church, and identifies these 4 unique kinds of people at different stages of spiritual development.

1. Exploring Christ
2. Growing in Christ
3. Close to Christ
4. Christ-Centered.

According to the Reveal website (http://www.revealnow.com/index.asp), each of these groups have uniquely defining characteristics. Therefore measuring the success of your church, measuring the Kingdom Impact that your ministry is having is a matter of getting a hold of, and measuring these internally transcendent personal characteristics.

We will talk more about this concept, and the Reveal study in the next few posts.

For more information, click http://www.revealnow.com/index.asp

Timothy Burns, Associate Editor Ministry in Motion Blog
Author, Forged in the Fire - Shaped by the Master
http://www.timothyburns.com

2008-09-22T00:21:00.004-04:00

Beyond Me: Living You-First in a Me-First World
By: Kathi Macias
Published by: New Hope Publishers, Birmingham, Al 2008

Ever had mornings you don’t want to get out of bed, days you don’t feel like going to work? What do you do when the issue is obeying God? You love him; you are his child. Yet you still don’t want to obey, to allow yourself to transformed into his image through your obedience.

The heart of Kathi Macias’ new book Beyond Me – Living a You-First Life in a Me-First World balances tenuously on this question. When the honeymoon is over - What Then? Inspired by a cosmetic line marketed as “It Is All About Me,” Kathi digs deeply into her 30 year personal Christian history to grapple with the issue of discipleship.

“Jesus didn't call us to make converts,” Kathi said during our interview. “We aren’t called to sit and listen to teaching, or (passively) expect to be blessed. He called us to make disciples. . . When you are all wrapped up in yourself, you make a pretty small package.” According to Kathi, making disciples is about modeling a changed life. When we become a Christian, we learn how to live for Christ. The next step is modeling a changed life, living you-first in a me-first world.

As Kathi and I talked for nearly 30 minutes, she returned to a number of themes which are woven throughout the text. As people, we often have layers of emotional issues, learned habits which run counter to a discipled, disciplined Christian lifestyle. Living ‘you-first’ means allowing Christ to remove the layers in order to reveal the person he has called and equipped you to become.

As Americans, we often hold onto an “I can do it, and have to do it myself” kind of attitude. Yet Jesus calls us to participate with him. WE have the choice to allow Him to participate in our lives. When we do, we build his kingdom, not our own.

A third theme is that Christians expect that they are now members of God's “Bless Me Club.” Too often Kathi has seen that Christians' thoughts and prayers revolve in a fixed orbit around our own desires. Kathi’s book is an encouragement, and a challenge to take the message of the gospel and make it personal. It’s not about being served, but serving others.

Toward the end of our interview, I asked Kathi what she believed opened the door to this kind of lifestyle. I have often heard these words from a church podium, yet not taken up the charge to change? She responded, “The bottom line to every sin, everything that takes us away from God’s call on our life is a broken relationship with Him.” The external sermon becomes an internal motivation when we understand God’s heart toward us. He takes upon himself the shame of sin, he doesn’t give it. He reaches and forgives rather than standing aloof and demanding of us. For Kathi, as she writes in this book, God so loved that he gave. He calls us to do the same.

I want to thank Kathi for writing this book, and highly recommend it for anyone tired of living an average Christian life. We aren’t called to be average. we are called to be disciples, to live you-first in a me-first world. You can find more about Kathi, and her writing and speaking ministry at http://www.kathimacias.com/

Posted by:

Timothy Burns, Associate Editor Ministry in Motion Blog
Author, Forged in the Fire - Shaped by the Master
http://www.timothyburns.com

Evangelizing the Churched

2008-09-16T00:08:00.007-04:00

Evangelizing the Churched
by: Timothy Burns

The challenge for every generation of Christian evangelicals is to communicate the gospel message in a way that is relevant to their culture and community. In a way, we are all missionaries. Our message never changes, but our methods must constantly evolve if we are to connect in a relevant way with our neighbors and cities, friends and communities.

The following is the conclusion of a survey undertaken by the Barna Research group. The entire article is online, and available from the link in the footnote. Here is Barna’s conclusion.

"The data provide a distinct image of each faith group," Barna commented. "Evangelicals are intensely driven by their faith: their life is substantially influenced by their beliefs and their lifestyle choices and aspirations reflect the centrality of their spirituality. Non-evangelical born again adults consider faith to be important but it is not the defining aspect of their existence; it is influential but not the determining factor. Notional Christians treat faith as just one of many dimensions of their life that serves a purpose, but it is not a driving force at all. Skeptics have replaced faith with a passion for healthy longevity and personal pleasure gained through world travel, sexual experiences, and obtaining knowledge. They are substantially less focused on relationships and legacy than are other groups. They tend to be less concerned about finding or pursuing a purpose in life because a majority of them believe life has no purpose beyond comfort and pleasure." (1)

How long has it been since you objectively evaluated the composition of your mission field. Who is in your community? Who comes through the doors of your church? Who doesn’t?

Barna continues:

"It is intriguing to study the ebb and flow of spirituality in a person’s life," he noted. "Those who fall into the evangelical stream have determined that life is all about the pursuit of God and the development of a life-altering faith. Atheists and agnostics, who slightly outnumber evangelicals, have arrived at exactly the opposite conclusion. And then there are the 80% or so who are at every other conceivable point along the continuum in between those two extremes. (2)

Barna adds that further research shows the evangelical church losing influence in the world. Instead, teens are on their way to constructing their own moral codes, as are many other societal segments. In the absence of relevant, influential moral and spiritual leadership from the Church who carries this responsibility, “Everyone did what was right in their own eyes.” (Judges 17.6)

Reading deeply into the conclusion above, Barna’s research highlights the solution for those willing to respond. Eighty percent of our population falls on a continuous line stretching between atheist and evangelical, and most have been exposed to a Christian influence, evidenced by their use of that exposure to create their own spiritual manifesto. Evangelicals’ task, it would seem, is not preaching the message anew, but communicating the message in a relevant way that encourages and equips the nominally committed to take steps along that continuum toward the “development of a life-altering faith.”

What does that look like? What would it look like in your church?

(1) Taken from: “Survey Reveals the Life Christians Desire” www.barna.org, July 21, 2008, Retrieved Sept 13, 2008

(2) Ibid, as quoted from Revolution; Barna, George; Tyndale House Publ; 2006

Without Rules

2008-09-02T09:14:00.003-04:00

Published author Tim Burns shares his take on the modernday Christian Coffeehouse...

In the 1960’s, coffeehouses didn’t sell pricey designer latte’s and iced cappuccinos. The 60’s altered the country’s culture, and significant population segment wanted a place to hang out, unbound from cultural norms. The coffeehouse was born without rules, a counter-culture haven. They were called ‘Hippies,’ and wanted to be ‘cool,’ ‘far out’ and ‘hang loose.’ A new generation wanted a place to call their own. The Coffeehouse was born.

Following the turbulent 60’s, a sovereign movement of God birthed the Jesus people, street Christians. They, or should I say we, also wanted a place to kick back, without the uptight rules of traditional churches and their people who didn’t “understand where we were coming from.” Christian coffeehouses were an intersection of these two new generational forces, counter culture and born again Christianity. Coffeehouses were a place where we felt accepted, welcomed, even loved. The coffeehouse was also a place to evangelize – preach the gospel in the street’s language. The new generation wanted to hear the gospel, and it had to be in their language.

Letters to Street Christians (Zondervan Publishing House, 1971) sits on my bookshelf; one of my last artifacts of this era. The tattered pages retell a 60’s street slang version of Paul’s epistles, - reminders that Christ and the gospel are meant to be communicated to the people in their language, not expounded from elevated podiums surrounded by stain glass.

What does this have to do with today’s coffeehouse?

Our culture is again segmented, fractured. Multicultural ideologues have separated us, and again we face significant communi-chasms. Neighbors don’t know how to talk to each other when we share little in common.

The coffeehouse is again a place to invite churched and non-churched alike. Seekers, pre-believers, suspicious, churched and backslider can come with their questions. The coffeehouse meets the unchurched person’s need as a place to interact, where their genuine questions can be met with love, understanding and biblical answers. A coffeehouse MUST BE a place for everyone, steeped in an ethos where seekers can express unpolished thoughts, or emotional hurts and still be accepted for who they are. Like the woman who washed Jesus feet with her tears – acceptance will open the doors to their hearts, enabling steps toward a new life.

To be effective, a coffeehouse ministry should be organized by believers who have a desire to communicate the gospel with unchurched and pre-believers who may have deep questions. Christ followers who staff a Christian coffeehouse need to be equipped with an Ephesians 4.11-15 ministry mindset. Each Christian has something to contribute – an ability to minister out of what God has given them.

From God’s point of view, the coffeehouse exists as a bridge between the Christ follower and the seeker. Traditional church rules don’t fit here. If a coffeehouse forgets this purpose, or tries to become church-like, it will sidestep God’s purpose, and slide toward spiritual irrelevance.

If a coffeehouse is to prosper, those leading it must be willing to take a dangerous step outside of Christian-ese and convention. The first coffeehouses existed without cultural rules in order to attract those outside social norms. No Rules, except maybe this one:

I pray that you be active in sharing your faith, so that you may come to know all the good things Christ has for you.
(Philemon 6 NIV)

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Teena Stewart, Editor DreamBuilders Ministry in Motion Blog

Author, Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice

http://www.ministryinmotion.net/teena_stewart.html

Skittering Sideways Down the Highway

2008-08-10T16:05:00.005-04:00

Living in the Midwest, winter time driving is a unique seasonal experience. It may be due to black ice hiding over a hill crest, or a pile of strategically placed slush – sooner or later a Michigan winter driver will find himself sliding sideways across lanes of traffic, praying desperately for a patch of dry pavement. For example, while navigating a four lane expressway, I looked out my passenger side window just in time to see my trailer sliding up along side my van. I had just changed lanes, and a heavy slush ridge lurking where the dotted white line should have been launched my trailer and van sideways.

While you may not know the out of control thrill of traveling sideways at 65 MPH, how do you respond when your life looses traction, like a car on ice? Suddenly you’re sliding backwards, surveying the landscape of where you’ve been, rather than calmly enjoying today, and joyfully planning for tomorrow? Something or someone has thrown you the proverbial curve ball, and all you can think about is getting the car over to the curb, and drawing a few deep, cleansing breaths.

Forged in the Fire - Shaped by the Masterdigs into this question. Life is not always placid. When we expect that unplanned ice patches will never happen, a life changing event can be just like the slush pile that sent my van sideways. What I didn’t expect erupted directly in my path. Now I’m skittering sideways down the life’s highway.

WHERE IS GOD NOW? Why did He let this happen? Why do my prayers for help, healing, courage of change fall on the floor like stone balloons?

Forged in the Fire – Shaped by the Master, by Hensley Publishers, 2004, declares that these events are not evidence that God has deserted you. Rather, our loving Father uses these events to cultivate your character. Through the lives of four Old Testament kings, God demonstrates his purpose - how these events can transform you for better, or reveal the serious fault lines in your spiritual foundation. In the end, what comes out of these events is not about how God answers your prayers, but how you respond to what God has allowed. Do you respond, draw on God’s resources, and live from the lessons he has taught you? Or do you react, reverting to your own wisdom and character, and “become filled with the fruit of our own doing” (Prov 14.14)

Forged in the Fire is a 12 week work book, suited for personal study or as a small group guidebook. Each week, you will read a specific scripture, dig deep to unpack the events, and then answer personally penetrating questions. Through this book, you will:

1. Learn to see God’s hand in the midst of challenging life-events.
2. Ask and answer the question of “What is God up to?”
3. Develop an individual action plan to draw closer to your Father God.
4. Participate with Him as you are changed into his image.

You can read a chapter at http://www.inkwellcommunication.com/forgedinthefire.htm. Copies can be purchased through major online retail outlets such as Amazon or Barnes and Noble, or you can get signed copies directly from the author. Discounts available for small groups.

Teena Stewart, Editor DreamBuilders Ministry in Motion Blog

Author, Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice

http://www.ministryinmotion.net/teena_stewart.html

WHAT'S ALL THE HOOPLA ABOUT THE SHACK?

2008-07-23T14:56:00.010-04:00

Recently Amy Deardon, an acquaintance of mine, emailed me and asked my opinion about the book The Shack. Every now and then a book will create a buying frenzy and catapult to the best seller list for reasons we can't always pinpoint.

Cases in point would include the Left Behind Series, the Prayer of Jabez, and the Davinci Code. This seems to indicate that people are spiritually hungry and may gravitate toward books that scratch their itch, even when some might seem a bit bent in their theology. (I won't name which of this list fall into that grouping.) There's nothing new under the sun, just a new way of putting a spin on it.

Whatever the case, the Shack ,which is a fiction work and, unless I mistaken an allegory, hit this quirky niche and the rest is history. Not having read the book (I usually tend to steer clear of books that create buying frenzies because I am naturally suspicious of them.) I could not give my friend much feedback.

One person on one of my writers' lists couldn't stomach the book because she felt it was wrong to depict God with feminine charactersistics and it was disrespectful to him. I did tell Amy that I took issue with at least the feminine characteristic argument, having read the scripture passages in Genesis which talk about "Let us create man in our own image," didn't feel we could rule out God having a feminine side.

We try to disect him with our finite brains, but he still defies description. Therefore, it is very possible that he does have feminine characteristics, especially since he created both male and female in his image.

That said, Amy wrote back and gave several sources that have looked at the Shack and reached their own conclusions. She also posted her own thoughts regarding the book on her blog.

http://amydeardon.blogspot.com/2008/07/shack.html

Two that give a negative/cautionary tone are:

http://www.mynameisrush.com/blog

http://www.challies.com/archives/book-reviews/the-shack-by-william-p-young.php

More balanced views can be found here

http://www.breakpoint.org/listingarticle.asp?ID=7830

http://lifestream.org/blog/?p=530

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Teena Stewart, Editor DreamBuilders Ministry in Motion Blog

Author, Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice

http://www.ministryinmotion.net/teena_stewart.html

DISCIPLESHIP IN A DIGITAL WORLD

2008-07-15T15:07:00.006-04:00

This week we welcome guest blogger Timothy Burns, author of Forged in the Fire - Shaped by the Master. Below Timothy gives his insight on Discipleship in a Digital World.

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Discipleship in a Digital World

You and I are called to communicate unchanging truth to a continually evolving world. This dynamic tension often strains our ability to connect, and relevantly influence our cultural toward Christ. Yet Jesus’ final desires were for his followers to create disciples, and change the culture. Mark’s gospel says “Go into the world and preach to every creature, baptizing them. . .” (Mark 16.15) John recalls Jesus said “as the Father sent me, now I send you.” (John 20.21) Matthew, writing to the Jewish community directly responsible to expand the gospel’s influence, grabs Jesus words. “Go ye therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing and teaching them” (Matt 28.19-20)

If we are called to make disciples, what does that mean? What is disciple building? What is discipleship’s place in today’s digital, live-streaming, instant world? Can a modern church reach the digital generation and fulfill the great commission with these modern, plugged in, wired, but personally disconnected tools? Well, as Dr. Phil would ask, “How is that working for you?” How much lasting, life changing impact is the church having with respect to the increasing commitment to technology and multi-media resources dedicated to preaching to the masses?

Has our nation taken on more or less of the image of Christ in the past 30 years? Are our children more, or less transformed by the power of Love incarnate? Just how is this working for us, the Church?

Discipleship is the means to transform a person into the image of Christ. Discipleship takes time, effort, love, prayer, and a commitment to walk with another person until you see Christ formed in them. Without discipleship, a new convert is likely to remain culturally connected the world outside of Christ. Old habits remain unchanged - former personal identity untransformed. The new life that started out with great hope and expectation tragically fades, like a seed planted in shallow soil, withered and dry.

Discipleship isn’t simple. But If we are to be the church, be the salt that keeps the world from decaying, be a light set on a hill for all to see, we have make a personal investment, and change our approach from building a church to building the Kingdom. Here are 5 points to ponder.

Win: The process starts when one person wins another to Christ. Paul was willing to become all things to all men so that by all means some might be saved. When Jesus called Peter, James and John to leave their boats, their journey was just beginning. Salvation, getting saved, praying a sinner’s prayer, coming forward to an altar call, making a profession of faith, is just a beginning. (1 Cor. 9.19-22, Jude 22-23)

Build: Like any newly born child, a newly born Christ follower must learn how to follow. Babies are fed, with milk, mush and then meat. Our task is to walk alongside these new believers, for 6 months, a year or longer, and teach them to walk with Christ. They will fall, and disappoint you. But without your example of faith and friendship, a new believer will likely return to what they knew, when what is new isn’t working out so well. (Philippians 4.6-9, 1 Thess. 5.11ff)

Equip: “You give a man a fish, and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish . . .” You know the rest. Each and every Christian can, and should feed themselves daily. Then we learn the power, and reach toward our potential in god’s kingdom. We are called to share what Christ has given to us with others. (2 Tim. 2.2, 2 Peter 1.3-8, Eph 4.8, 11-15)

Release: The Discipleship cycle completes when the new Christ follower engages, giving of his life, gifts, resources and time to the life of the church and others. Jesus spent 2 years with his disciples, and then sent them out 2 x 2, preaching and demonstrating with miraculous signs that the kingdom of God was come. Today’s disciples are called to the same work. (Luke 10.1-18)

Duplicate: Start the process again, this time two people work to build the kingdom.

If the Church is to look like the Church, and be the bride of our Bridegroom, the body of Christ . . . we must take on the work of the church, which is the work of making disciples and transforming the world. Then we will be changed. Then we will be like Him. Then we will be ready for his return.

2 Cor. 5.17-20

Win: Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creation,
Build: Old things have passed away, behold, all things are become new
Equip: And all things are of God, who has reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation.
Release: To know, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself . . . and has committed unto us the world of reconciliation.
Duplicate: Now then, we are ambassadors for Christ.

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Timothy Burns lives in West Michigan, and has written professionally for over 8 years. Timothy writes with a deep connection to cultural influences, and how these unwritten patterns often influence behaviors and beliefs. While personalities and cultures differ by continent and decade, human nature does not. Often the ability to identify the human element or organizational culture sets Timothy’s work apart from what can be otherwise commonplace copy. His writing spans topics of Christian living, apologetics, and the hidden benefits that often surface through personal trials. In the professional fields, Timothy's insight into human dynamics is also evident in many sociology, psychology, management, and educational white papers to which he has contributed.

You are welcome to visit Tim’s website at www.inkwellcommunication.comOr his Myspace blog at www.myspace.com/timothy_burns

CHILDREN’S MINISTRY: ENTERTAINING OR MAKING DISCIPLES

2008-07-06T10:46:00.001-04:00

We welcome Tamara Kraft as our guest blogger this week...

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Paul is prepared for children’s church every week. The children are excited and can’t wait to see what he has planned. They have fun playing the elaborate games. They ooh and ahh over the gospel illusions and creative object lessons. They love the motions to the activity songs. It’s even fun listening to the illustrated Bible stories.

However, Paul is frustrated because the children in his children’s ministry don’t really grow spiritually. Week after week they come and enjoy themselves. Paul doesn’t seem to be making a lasting impact upon their lives, and he doesn’t know what to do about it.

Jim also uses games, gospel illusions, and creative teaching techniques, but the children in his ministry are growing spiritually. Brittany’s mom came to him last week to thank him. Brittany went to her mom after being convicted in children’s church for being disrespectful and asked her mother’s forgiveness.

Tommy led four of his classmates to the Lord and brings visitors almost every week. Kyle asked Jim last week if there was anything he could pray with him about. He told Jim that he felt led by God to be a prayer support for him. When an altar call is given, children swarm to the altar to pray for other children who go to the altar.
What makes the difference between Paul’s and Jim’s ministries? They both do pretty much the same thing in children’s church. They spend the same amount of time preparing and praying. But there’s a major difference in the children. The reason is that Paul entertains the children; Jim disciples the children.

You might wonder how Jim manages to do this. It’s not difficult if you understand that we are called to be a part of the body of Christ, not only as adults but also as children. Here are some of the steps you can take to disciple the children in your ministry:

Disciple children in prayer. Teach your children to pray. Then let them have opportunities to pray. Too often we let children pray, and we comment on how cute their prayers are. When we do that, we reduce their prayers to entertainment. We should be teaching children how to reach heaven with their prayers. We should be encouraging them to pray every day, and we should give them something to pray about.

When I need healing, I ask children to lay hands on me and pray for my body. I teach them scriptures to pray over me. When I need encouragement, I ask children to pray for me. When I need wisdom, you guessed it, I ask children to pray for me. I teach them how to pray, what scriptures to use, and then I ask them to pray. I don’t ask them to pray because it’s cute. I ask them to reach heaven for me.

One resource I’ve found very helpful in teaching children to pray is the magazine, Pray Kids. This magazine is published by Prayer Magazine and every issue is written to disciple children to pray. These magazines come in bulk, so you can order enough to place in the children’s hands.

Disciple children in evangelism. Teach your children to witness. Teach them to share the message. Teach them the scriptures to use. Give them illustrations to use when they witness. Then take them places where they can have the opportunity to share their faith.

One easy tool to help children learn to witness is the witness bracelet. You can purchase these or have the children make them. Just like the wordless book, they use colors convey salvation. Yellow represents heaven where God lives and wants us to someday live. Black represents the sin that stops us from living with God in heaven. Red is the blood of Jesus that was shed for our sins. White means that, if we ask Jesus to forgive us, He will cleanse us as white as snow. Green means we need to grow in our faith.

There are many places you can go to give children an opportunity to share their faith. You can have them help with a benevolence ministry, or take them to a nursing home, or you can take them to the park for a day, instructing them to look for opportunities to witness.

Disciple children in service. Many in the church have the habit of telling children over and over to sit and be quiet until they’re eighteen years old. Then when they reach adulthood, the same people will complain that all they do is sit in the pews and listen. If we are to disciple a generation to serve God, we need to start when they are young.

Think about the things that need to be done in your children’s ministry. Do you need someone to run the sound? Train a group of children to do it. Do you need people who are gifted in helps to take attendance, check children in, set up chairs, and tear down after church? Again, train children to do it.

The opportunities for children to serve in the church are only limited by your understanding of how much a child is capable of doing. I have used children for sound, Power Point, registration, praise and worship leaders, altar workers, skits, object lessons, puppets, monitors, and many other things. I’ve even had eleven and twelve year olds preach for me in children’s church. You heard me right. They preached. Those children are now adults who are in full time ministry.

There are other areas that children can be discipled in also. The only limitations are the ones we choose to place on our children. When they are discipled in ministry, something amazing happens. Children grow closer to God. They learn to listen for His voice. They learn that God can use them. He has a plan for their lives. So which are you doing? Are you entertaining children or are you discipling them?

Brief Bio:
Tamera Kraft has been a children’s pastor for over 20 years. She is the leader of a ministry called Revival Fire For Kids where she mentors other children’s leaders, teaches workshops, and is a children’s ministry consultant and children’s evangelist. She is also a writer and has curriculum published including Kid Konnection 5: Kids Entering the Presence of God published by Pathway Press. She is a recipient of the 2007 National Children’s Leaders Association Shepherd’s Cup for lifetime achievement in children’s ministry.

Her website and blog are located at www.tamerakraft.net.

ARE VANITY LICENSE PLATES REALLY A WITNESS?

2008-06-27T16:45:00.003-04:00

There's a discussion currently going on in the state of North Carolina about whether the powers that be should issue vanity license plates with a Christian message. Here in the Bible belt it seems that people are more open to wearing their faith on their sleeve, or ahem, in this case on the rear of their car.

My understanding is that they were going to allow it, the rationale being that it generated more money for the state. But then someone got wind of it and started yelling "BUT THAT'S A VIOLATION OF CHURCH AND STATE!"

Frankly, I could care less whether they issue them or not. I truly don't believe that people come to Christ from seeing signs like "Jesus Saves" or "I'm going to heaven, how about you?" or stickers with a fish outline on them. And, if you're going to slap a bumper sticker on your car or a plate on your backside, and then drive like a maniac or putt along at 35 in a 55 mph zone, thereby ticking people off, you'd better think twice about the image you're projecting. People are watching you all the time. They will watch you even more closely if you have a message posted on your car.

If you are going to label yourself, your walk, er, or in this case, your drive, should match your sqawk. I would be interested to hear what others think on this subject.

Teena Stewart, Editor DreamBuilders Ministry in Motion Blog

Author, Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice

http://www.ministryinmotion.net/teena_stewart.html

Life Journals: Excellent Discipling Resources

2008-06-17T08:34:00.004-04:00

There is a superb discipling resource I would like to recommend. They came out of Pastor Wayne Cordero's church in Hawaii. I learned about these journals when I was reviewing a Christian book that mentioned them. I purchased two different ones to have handy as resources. The First Steps one is for new believers. It says, "First Steps is a handy guide for those new to faith in Christ as well as to daily devotions. The reading plan is streamlined for those just getting familiar with the Bible."

They're intended to help people capture and catalog lessons God teaches in a way that will help them grow.

How to use them. They provide a daily Bible reading plan. The person reads the passages. When they find a life lesson in their passage they write the date, give their lesson a title, write down the main scripture and what they see in the scripture and how it will be different today because of waht they have just read (application). Then they write out a prayer. Then they conclude their devo time by praying for what they have written.

What's really cool is there is a Bible reading plan included that they can start in whatever month they choose to start in. I think Cordero actually has small groups formed around these journals. Anyway, my thought was in our community as we seek to lead people to Christ and help them mature, these would be excellent tools to present someone with and also including a basic Bible for new believers.

I realize that not everyone will be into journaling, but I think it's a very useful for the right person or groups.

Our coffee shop ministry Java Journey (which is in the process of launching), may possibly provide these at no cost along with Bibles for new believers as part of our outreach. There is more info on them here http://www.lifejournal.cc/yourdevotions/

Teena Stewart, Editor DreamBuilders Ministry in Motion Blog

Author, Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice

http://www.ministryinmotion.net/teena_stewart.html

Colossians 1:22 Ministry

2008-06-14T16:00:00.012-04:00

We like to point out ministries that can help encourage and equip people in ministry. Colossians 1:22 Ministry is a new ministry that features writings and discussions meant to be thought-provoking and encouraging to Christians. If you like a good discussion. This might be a good blog site to visit. Stop by and give them a shout out. Here's their blog site Colossians 1:22 Ministry.

Teena Stewart

Author, Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice

http://www.ministryinmotion.net/teena_stewart.html

HERE'S TO YOU, TRISH

2008-05-06T16:03:00.005-04:00

I find it interesting that on the tail end of guest blogger Richard Mabry's post on coping with grief that I am now coping with grief myself. Just yesterday I received a phone call notifying me that a very dear friend was lost to cancer this week.

I had only known Trish for little more than a year but in that year even when she was struggling with cancer, we became close. We had celebrated her healing, believing she was in remission when Jeff and I picked up and moved away from CA to NC in November of 2007 to start our coffee shop ministry (http://www.javajourney.org).

Several months later I had the oddest urging to call Trish. Inwardly I think I sensed what the call confirmed. Miraculously I got a hold of Trish despite the three hour time difference. That's when I learned that her cancer had returned.

Trish responded in her usual cheerful voice telling me that things had been really bad for a while but that she was feeling better. If anyone could lick this thing, she could. But healing was not meant to be. Just a few weeks later I was notified that she was sent home by doctors. There was nothing more they could do. Yesterday came the phone call. Trish had lost the fight.

She will be greatly missed but I celebrate that Trish knew Christ very intimately. Those she left behind have a peace knowing she's in the arms of the Father. Trish taught me several things, how to laugh, even when you're going through a life and death battle, how to be a servant, volunteering her time to help out in the church office, even cleaning the church bathrooms when they asked small groups to volunteer to help. Most of all she taught me how to seize the day with zest. She was the most positive, upbeat, energetic person I have ever known.

So, here's to you, Trish, for being an inspiration, for making our lives a little brighter, even if it was just for a short time.

I urge our blog readers to take a moment to post a tribute comment to someone you've lost who inspired you.

MINISTERING DURING GRIEF- CONTINUED DISCUSSION

2008-04-21T09:16:00.003-04:00

Dr. Richard L. Mabry Ccontinues his discussion of ministering to those that are grieving. Mabry's book, Tender Scar, The: Life After the Death of a Spousecame out of his own grief experience, the loss of a wife.

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Feed the hunger

Initially, there’s an abundance of food in the home
where death has struck. Casseroles abound, and
desserts fill kitchen tables and counters. After a
week or so, the food that remains is consigned to the
freezer. The family has dispersed, friends don’t drop
by, and the widow or widower sits alone. Grief robs
them of any semblance of appetite. It’s just too much
trouble to even reheat something.

How can you help? Bring food, of course, but don’t
stop there. Wait a bit until things settle down, and
then invite the grieving person to your home for a
meal. Include several of their friends. Find out
their favorite dishes and prepare them. Don’t make it
a contest among you to see who can make the guest of
honor eat. Instead, simply make it easy for them to
engage in the social interaction and watch for the
results.

Give a gentle touch

Hugs are the best medicine, and help fill the void
left by the absence of a loved one’s touch. The
Message translation of the Bible renders Romans 16:16
as “Holy embraces all around!” What a wonderful
characterization of the family of faith. Enfold your
friend in your arms, and show them you’re holding them
in your heart.

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We invite our readers to Talk Back by posting their comments and questions.

MINISTERING DURING GRIEF

2008-04-16T19:17:00.004-04:00

We're honored to have Dr. Richard L. Mabry as a guest blogger this week. Dr. Mabry's book, Tender Scar, The: Life After the Death of a Spousecame out of his own grief experience, the loss of a wife. Below he shares some insights regarding helping people through the grief process.

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Since the publication of my book, The Tender Scar:
Life After The Death Of A Spouse, I’m often asked how
we can minister during a time of grief: to family, to
friends, to church members. I wish I had all the
answers, but here are a few thoughts that might help.

Penetrate the wall of isolation

In the throes of my own grief, I hungered for
conversation and human contact, so much so that I
welcomed phone calls from telephone solicitors. I
checked my email a dozen times a day, hoping for
something from friends but willing to settle for spam.

Give your grieving friend a call a couple of times a
week. What can you say? Just ask, “How are you
feeling?” If that doesn’t lead to a conversation, try
“Do you want to talk about it?” The substance of the
conversation will be forgotten soon, but the effort
won’t. The most important thing is to care, and to
show it.

Send an email, if the bereaved one is as tied to a
computer as most folks are nowadays. Let them know
you’re thinking of them. Point them to an
inspirational web site you like. Send them something
that made you laugh. The content of the message is
important, but more important still is the fact that
you cared enough to reach out to them.

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Be sure to visit again as Dr. Mabry continues his talk on Ministering During Grief

As always, your comments are welcome

INTERVIEW WITH PAT J. SIKORA

2008-03-29T20:20:00.009-04:00

Popular writer, speaker, consultant, and founder of Mighty Oak Ministries (http://www.mightyoakministries.com/), Pat Sikora is author of Why Didn’t You Warn Me? How to Deal with Challenging Group Members.

MIM: I’ve really enjoyed reading your book, Why Didn’t You Warn Me? How to Deal with Challenging Group Members. Tell us how you came to write this book.

PAT: Much of the material in this book began as a chapter in my first book, Small Group Bible Studies: How to Lead Them (Standard Publishing, 1999). That chapter was the most popular in the book, so when the book went out of print, I began photocopying that chapter and a couple of others for my book table when I would speak at conferences. This one was always the best seller. Then back in 2006, I got a call from Mike Mack, who had always been a champion of my book, and especially the “Why Didn’t You Warn Me?” chapter. He had just become an editor at Standard and was working on a four-book series of Small Group Help! Guides. He wanted Why Didn’t You Warn Me? as the fourth book in the series and told me I had two months to get it to him!

MIM: Two months! Isn’t that pretty fast to write a book?

PAT: It sure is! Especially that year. The deadline coincided with my son’s college graduation, which was to be followed a couple of months later by his wedding. I actually had less than two months to complete the book because of my prior commitments. Fortunately, God knew about my crazy schedule. I had edited and expanded the book a year or so earlier. I had toyed with the idea of self-publishing it, but just couldn’t bring myself to take on all the business details that would entail. So it was sitting there, mocking me, for at least a year before Mike called. But it was almost ready to go. I just needed to put it in the series format. It was exciting to see how God had it all planned out!

MIM: How did you become an expert in dealing with challenging people?

Pat: I’m not sure we ever become experts in this, but I’ve been involved with small groups for over 30 years. In that time, I’ve seen it all and have either dealt well with most challenges or learned from my mistakes.

My first small group experiences were as a baby Christian in a singles ministry that operated primarily though small groups. The lay leaders in that group were some of the best I’ve ever seen in terms of managing challenges and bringing even the most difficult people to maturity. I absorbed all I could in those years, and then took those skills into other ministries. I’ve led just about every kind of group except for a men’s group. I started and managed a mom’s ministry in our church for a few years. More recently, I’ve worked with a lot of women who were profoundly abused as children and now have a variety of more serious mental and emotional health issues. I have a heart for the wounded and they seem to gravitate to me. I believe they can grow, mature, and heal when given the proper environment—and so they do.

MIM: And what do you consider the proper environment?

PAT: A healthy environment for growth includes several factors.

First, they need to be welcomed into a group and treated like a “normal” person, regardless of the baggage they bring. I’m big on increasing the joy capacity of members. This is a concept I learned from Jim Wilder, a Christian psychologist who has written about it in The Life Model: Living From the Heart Jesus Gave You. Basically, what he says is that in order to heal from just about any emotional trauma, we need to be able to return to joy from negative emotions. We do this based on our joy capacity, which is supposed to be developed in a child’s first 18 months by good parents. All too often, it isn’t, so the church ends up needing to re-parent wounded people. We increase their joy capacity by simply communicating, “I’m glad to be with you” in an authentic way. Think about the way we usually treat people who are different. We sort of cringe and give off the message, “I’m sorry you’re here.” Simply by changing that subliminal message, letting our eyes and hearts delight in them, we’ll increase their joy and thus their ability to heal. I’ve seen people in my groups heal from this factor alone. When they were finally loved, appreciated, and valued, they began to change before our eyes.

Second, people need to be in a safe environment. As leaders, we can’t allow any member to act out. We need to make the group safe for everyone by dealing effectively with the challenging people.

Third, we need to structure the group for maximum growth. This includes paying attention to the type of study we do—working from the Bible rather than from a good book and working on application rather than theory.

Finally, but equally important, it includes leading from principle. In my book, I list seven principles that need to under gird any small group that I lead. When I keep those principles in mind, I can deal with a little discomfort from challenging people because I know why I’m doing this.

MIM: What is the biggest problem you see in small group ministries?

Pat: By far the biggest problem I see is leaders who are unwilling to get a little messy and welcome challenging people into their groups. They want their groups to run well, be fun, and meet their needs. And even if the leader is willing to take on a challenging person, often the group members aren’t. They want to be in a group of people like themselves, and that doesn’t include challenging! I understand this reaction. People are tired, overstressed, and busy. In the little free time they have, they want to be ministered to. But if we all take this approach, who will love the unlovely?

Leaders, perhaps unconsciously, want to look good. They want a group of people they know how to manage. They don’t want to live in the messies, as I call the real lives of challenging people. I don’t blame them. We all want to be successful. But perhaps we need to redefine what success is. Perhaps it’s loving someone to wholeness.

MIM: Why don’t we see more of this type of leadership?

Pat: Frankly, I don’t think it’s being modeled for us. It isn’t being taught or encouraged. Recovery ministries are often “over there” rather than right here in the middle of the church. The people who attend them are branded, labeled—and excluded.
If I’m an average, middle class person in the average, middle class church, I probably haven’t seen real people transformed into the likeness of Jesus. Most of us want instant success. It would be nice if these people could get it together by next Tuesday. Sorry, transformational ministry can take years. Many years and many different forms of ministry.

MIM: Can you give me an example?

Pat: I could give you many, but I’m thinking of a single mom I began praying with after church about 10 years ago. Maybe longer. Week after week, she’d wait in my line for prayer. Sometimes for an hour or more because I had several women who came to me every week. We’d sit down and she’d start dumping. Fifteen minutes later she’d take a breath and dump some more. It was clear that I was the only person in her world who would just listen to her and not judge. It was hard to know where to begin. Her lifestyle was out of alignment. Her thinking was out of alignment. Her emotions were all over the place. After a few years of this, I invited her to be part of a group I started for challenging women who didn’t fit in the church’s regular small group ministry. We did that for a long time. Then I began discipling her one on one. When she had grown to a point of stability, we stopped for awhile. And she kept growing. We reconnect periodically. I now consider her a spiritual peer. She prays for me. Effectively. Her faith is solid. She dresses differently. She looks different. Her kids have turned around and are following the Lord. Just because someone took the time to listen, hold her accountable, and love her.

MIM: That sounds exciting. What can people do to get started?

PAT: Begin by praying that God would give you a heart for the challenging and the ability to see His image in them. Ask Him to bring you the one person He wants you to love to wholeness. He won’t give you more than you can handle. My book gives simple, step-by-step tips for dealing with 19 of the most common challenges. My blog at www.whydidntyouwarnme.com/blog is available with more information and I’m always happy to answer questions on the blog. I’m also available to consult with churches that want to become better at ministering to challenging people.

Pat’s book Why Didn’t You Warn Me? How to Deal with Challenging Group Members (Standard Publishing: 2007) is available from your local Christian bookstore and most online booksellers, or from Pat at http://whydidntyouwarnme.com/resources/.

Talk Back

DreamBuilders invites our readers to talk back to Pat Sikora by making related comments or commenting on the following questions:

Have you ever had difficulty with a challenging group member? If so, how did you handle it?

Pat said that success is loving someone to wholeness. Do you agree or disagree. Why or why not?

Has anything Pat said changed your perspective of difficult group members?

To respond, leave your comments below.

Square One: Starting a Small Group

2008-01-19T16:21:00.000-05:00

By Teena Stewart

Teena Stewart is married to an ordained minister and is a published author, ministry consultant and coach. She works in collaboration with DreamBuilders Ministry in Motion (ministryinmotion.net/), an organization that equips church leaders. Click here to order her new book, Successful Small Groups from Concept to Practice (Beacon Hill) or on her small groups page (www.inistryinmotion.net/group_bibles_studies.html.) The Stewarts are in the process of starting a coffee shop ministry in North Carolina. (www.javajourney.org/)

My husband Jeff and I just recently left behind church ministry positions in California to relocate to North Carolina. Our plan--to start a coffee shop ministry. One of our goals is to reach unchurched people for Christ. A small group community will, we hope, be a key feature of this coffee shop fellowship.

I’m already growing impatient as we put preliminary pieces in place to make this dream happen. But, as is often the case, we need to walk before we can run. We met with Dennis and Jeannie, our two key leaders out here in NC and talked about the direction to take. After batting around ideas, we all agreed that rather than wait until the coffee shop opens to start our ministry, we should move ahead and use a small group venue and meet in homes. (Only we can’t meet in our home since we don’t have one yet.)

Our next challenge, deciding who to invite to the group. We’re relying primarily on Dennis and Jeannie since they know people in the area. And we’ve got more of a challenge since we are starting a small group without already being part of a church. Dennis and Jeannie brainstormed potential group member contacts. But their spiritual standing was very diverse. One couple was notorious for church hopping and never seemed satisfied with whatever fellowship they chose to join. Another couple who came to mind fell into the seeker and possible new age category since the husband seemed open to spiritual discussion but the wife, who was from another country, had some peculiar beliefs. Then there was the potential couple we’d been told about by a friend who said they were unchurched.

Would inviting this odd mix of characters really gel into a small group? Though we want to reach the unchurched, we feel it is important to carefully consider who we inviteto the group because it will dictate the personality of the group andperhaps even its health.

TALK BACK
What advice would you give to us as we launch this new group? What lessons have you learned? What precautions would you take? Click on "comments" below and let us know what you think!