Random Cathy | life outside the lines

Realizing stuff about yourself...

2013-05-17T05:00:00.000-05:00

Yoga is often referenced as a path to self-realization. And while that sounds lofty, it is actually pretty simple. When you are quiet enough, you notice things about yourself that you may not have noticed before. I've been having this experience more and more lately.

Many of the practices in yoga focus on building agni.

Agni means fire. And while it is responsible for drive, willpower, etc, it is also about digestion. The thing is that yoga doesn't differentiate what you digest. Agni is as responsible for the digestion of emotions, learning and thoughts as it is for food.

My personal practice at the moment centers on building agni, and on the mat the other day I had a huge realization about myself. I rarely take time to savor.

Not food. Not ideas. Not emotions.

I've always had this sense that time is short, so I move at a rapid pace to be able learn, experience and get as many things done as I possibly can. The downside is that it takes time to digest the things we take in.

Digestion needs to be slow. You have to give it time.

I'm realizing it is important for me to slow the pace to savor more. To pause long enough to fully digest information, experience, and well...food. It is something that must become part of my practice.

An observation...

2013-05-16T11:02:00.001-05:00

Of love and isolation

2013-05-15T06:00:00.000-05:00

"Oh it's so typical, love leads to isolation. So you build that wall..." - Phil Collins

Ever been to a family gathering that was awkward? I've had the odd experience this week of both being part of these exchanges in my own family and of hearing others share their stories. (Mother's Day, Thanksgiving, and Christmas all seem to be petri dishes for this phenomena.)

As the stories have swirled around in my head, I can't help but look for the commonalities, and this is what I've discovered.

Each person has an idea in their head of right and wrong. To be sure, there are some things we all agree on—like maybe the 10 Commandments—but in areas of how people live day-to-day life, there is a great deal of variety in terms of what people think is rude, what is appropriate, how business should be done, lifestyle choices, politics, yada, yada. We are infinite in variety and life experiences, so it makes sense that we would vary in this, yet because we have a singular point of view, each person operates as if their standard of "right/wrong" is THE standard.

Kathryn Schulz, author of "Being Wrong: Adventures in the Margin of Error," has a brilliant illustration in her Ted Talk. She asks the audience how it feels to be wrong. They shout out a few answers: embarrassed, failure, just feels bad, etc. She pauses and says, "No. That's how it feels to find out you are wrong. Being wrong feels exactly like being right."

Most of us are wrong about a great many things. But to us—unless it is staring us in the face—most of us walk around feeling like we are right. The problem occurs when we engage the people in our lives by making sure that they are right too.

Something profound happens when we let this go. When we begin to engage people from a place of acceptance rather than a place of correction. Love occurs.

And this is the thing. Love is what all of us are looking for. In that deep part of us. From our hearts. In fact, we are absolutely starving for it.

When someone offers us correction instead of acceptance, we build walls. Our hearts can't handle "I can only love you if you are this."

There are many places in our lives where this is simply the way things are. At work, in school, even socially...our very being is judged and either accepted or rejected on a daily basis. Most of us get up each day, don our emotional bullet-proof vests and operate at a fairly high level in this place. But in our marriages, with our parents, and even with our closest friends, we have to be able to take those off.

This judgment challenge is even worse in our churches where people say, "The Bible is the standard" so that they create rules which are defended at the expense of love. Most don't realize that what really occurs is that their interpretation of the Bible becomes the defended standard—as evidenced by the infinite variety of denominations and interpretations in the Christian church alone.

It takes a great deal of humility to remove oneself as the standard of right/wrong and to offer ourselves as a gift of love to those around us. Thing is we have to do this openly and with a whole heart, because if we do it from a place of pride it becomes this sort of sick martyrdom that will mitigate the joy that is an essential characteristic of freely flowing love. (Not only that, but people can detect the lack of authenticity in a heartbeat.)

While most of us can identify the way others have forced us to create walls, we miss that to unlock it, we have to be willing to lay aside our own judgments of others and offer acceptance. This doesn't mean that any behavior is "okay." We still remain the arbitrators of how we allow other people to treat us. However, if we are honest, most often we don't limit our judgments to our own personhood and interactions. Instead we feel qualified to judge everything from a person's clothes to what they eat to their interactions with others. And even if we don't comment, just simply holding those views speaks volumes.

To be fair, some people will never be "safe" people to be around, and families are steeped in such patterns of behavior that it is often difficult to pave new roads. However, if we embrace love and acceptance as the power over "being right" it changes the game. And the Spirit of Love is there to offer help for the asking.

©Cathy Hutchison

You have magical powers

2013-05-13T06:00:00.000-05:00

When I was a little girl, I wanted magical powers.

So. Bad.

You see, I was certain they were real. After all, I had been told the fairy stories and had seen the Disney movies.

I've learned as an adult that we all have magical powers. That at any given moment we can make something special and unexpected happen. It only requires cultivating the creativity to see a moment, and the courage to take the risk and act.

The magic is small, but powerful. There is one defining rule however. The magic always has to be used for someone other than yourself. You might...

Purchase a latte for the store clerk who woke up too late to get coffee.
Randomly tell someone in your life they are beautiful.
Leave a piece of real jewelry that no longer has meaning for you in a park with a note to the person who finds it.
Smile.
Pay for the order in a drive through for the person behind you.
Take someone else's cart back to the grocery store for them.

With every magical act, you change the world we live in. The power is yours.

Um....about that spending fast

2013-05-10T05:00:00.000-05:00

Okay, so you know how when you are on a diet and you decide to eat a cookie, and then after you eat that cookie you decide "ah, what the heck...I'll just finish the bag"?

Yeah....this month, the spending fast has been kind of like that.

The "spending fast" (and yes, I feel like I have to put quotations around it) has made me aware of my spending habits and what I buy. It has made changes in the way I spend money. In that way the exercise has been really worthwhile. But, what I found is that I'm unwilling to not buy something when it is supporting a change I want to make in my life...like the composter, the produce bags, or the meditation cushion I bought this month. With that said, I also know that I also often buy these types of items and they don't work out the way I thought they would, so they end up at Goodwill.

It is with a good bit of chagrin that I declare an end to the boldly proclaimed spending fast. What I started with much enthusiasm in January is now defunct.

Tsk, tsk, tsk...

Just do it

2013-05-09T05:00:00.000-05:00

Multitasking vs. Mindfulness

2013-05-08T05:00:00.000-05:00

I've become keenly aware lately of the difference in multitasking vs. mindfulness.

Most of us are multitaskers. We know how to get a lot of things done at once. The thing is that it creates a bit of a fragmented existence. As our attention is divided and we strive to keep up, whole days rush past in a blur as our hands do one thing and our minds are someone else. It creates stress.

Mindfulness requires our full attention. We focus on—and enjoy fully—whatever we are doing at a given moment. Rather than having our thoughts in the past or the future, we focus on the present.

Here is the weird thing I've discovered. When I do this, it seems that time expands.

I don't actually get less done. Instead, I am more focused and can enjoy what I do. I have time to savor my food, enjoy a drive, have a conversation, complete a task. Each time I find myself getting caught up in old patterns of rushing, divided attention, stressful thoughts, I simply bring myself back--usually with a focus on my breath.

I always thought that multitasking made me productive. Now, I think it just makes me stressed.

This is an ongoing journey for me.

Perspective

2013-05-06T05:00:00.001-05:00

I am convinced that one of the reasons God does not oppose our infinite variety of opinions is that He allows our understanding of Him to unfold.

So He watches as we put Him into little boxes that we can hold in our hands and study.

I am convinced this is so because if we truly grasped the nature and depth of His great love for not only us but those around us, we couldn't bear it. We would be terrified by our smallness.

Besides, we prefer being evenly matched. It gives us a semblance of control.

The need for exposure...

2013-05-03T06:30:00.000-05:00

I'm not sure that there is real forgiveness without exposure. The need to cover up our sin is as instinctual as Adam hiding in Eden after the fall.

There is honesty in exposure.

I makes us acknowledge things as they really are without the usual stories we tell ourselves.

There is something about the painful moment of honesty that allows healing to begin. Forgiveness which hovered right out of reach seeps in.

There is no forgiveness without confession.

And in the end, honesty is a small price to pay for freedom.

Giveaway! Project 333 Microcourse Winner

2013-05-03T06:00:00.000-05:00

And the winner is Kristy!

I will connect with you via Facebook to get the details and send access info for the course.

Still time to enter | Project 333 Giveaway!

2013-05-02T10:30:00.001-05:00

Still time to "like us" and win Project 333's Dress with Less Microcourse.

What is a microcourse?

micro-schedule: learn something new in a week or less
micro-investment: always less than $20 (or in this case free to a winner)
micro-inbox commitment: all course material delivered in one folder via one click download

To enter, all you have to do is:

Like Random Cathy on Facebook.

Or, if you've already done that, then simply leave a comment at: https://www.facebook.com/randomcathy
The winner will be selected on Friday at 6:00 am and announced then. I will contact you via Facebook to get your e-mail address to send the download link for the course!

Simple Vegan | Cream of Mushroom and Spinach Soup

2013-05-01T06:00:00.000-05:00

I threw this together based on stuff I had in the house and it wound up super tasty and satisfying. The Vitamix made it very creamy.

2T olive oil
1 medium onion
1 pint of mushrooms
2 cups vegetable broth, heated (or 2 c boiling water with veggie bullion)
1/2 can of unsweetened coconut milk
2 handfuls of spinach leaves
2 t of thyme
Salt if needed

Heat olive oil in skillet, then saute onion until almost clear. Add mushrooms and continue to saute until really fragrant. Once onions are completely clear and the mushrooms are browned a bit, transfer entire contents of skillet to a high-speed blender.

Heat vegetable broth (I used a microwave) and add to blender along with coconut milk, spinach and thyme.

Spin on high setting until creamy. Taste and add salt if needed.

Another Giveaway! Project 333's Dress with Less Microcourse

2013-04-29T05:00:00.000-05:00

Yay! It's another giveaway! This time, the prize is Project 333's Dress with Less Microcourse.

What is a microcourse?

micro-schedule: learn something new in a week or less
micro-investment: always less than $20 (or in this case free to a winner)
micro-inbox commitment: all course material delivered in one folder via one click download

To enter, all you have to do is:

Like Random Cathy on Facebook.

Sometimes you have to honor the sentiment

2013-04-26T06:00:00.000-05:00

No matter how many passes I make through my things working toward a more minimalist lifestyle, I can never seem to get rid of this jewelry box. It is perfectly empty except for a couple of notes from John.

I bought it back in the days when we were poor. Like only-made-$1500-a-month-and-had-a-kid poor.

I remember I was really excited because we were buying laundry detergent at Walmart and walked down the clearance aisle. They were offloading jewelry boxes after Christmas and this one had broken glass in the door. I picked it up for $5.

I made a fabric panel out of a scrap of material left over from a valance I'd made for our living room, and it was good as new. (At least to me it was. Better, because it was something I'd always wanted.)

Even though I now have a large jewelry box with drawers that stands in my closet, I can't seem to let it go.

Sometimes, you have to honor the sentiment.

The Capsule Wardrobe

2013-04-24T06:00:00.000-05:00

So, one of the things I researched when getting ready for Project 333 is how to build a capsule wardrobe. The basic idea is to have a limited number of pieces that work well with each other so that you can effortlessly mix and match. (Think Garanimals for Grown Ups.)

There aren't exact rules because people's lives are so different. For example, a soccer mom's wardrobe would differ from an executive. Plus there is personal preference. Do you dress up to go out or are you more of the type to just casually have friends over to hang out? Is your office business casual or do you go to a lot of high-end social events.

My lifestyle is essentially casual. This is how my capsule wardrobe for the next three months looks:

And here are some of the looks from this week:

The idea is to not spend so much time thinking about clothes and to have something that fits your life without a lot of excess. I'll keep you posted on how it goes.

The Project 333 Experiment

2013-04-22T05:00:00.000-05:00

I was inspired by Project 333 this month to take the challenge of dressing with less. Here is how the project works:

For three months, you live with only 33 items in your closet. Everything else gets pared down to only the items you really love, then those are boxed up and put away.

The idea is that you spend less time thinking about what you wear and that you enjoy the space that "less" gives you both in time and square footage.

So, this is a photo of my minimized closet. The Project 333 encourages keeping only 33 items including shoes and accessories, but I love accessories and figured it was enough to get down to 33 items of clothing. I did minimize my shoes, donating any that weren't 100% comfortable, and I downsized my jewelry, scarves and bags as well. The result is that everything fits in my closet with space between the hangers and lots of room to spare. (I even had room to hang my bags and 2 swimsuit/sarangs at the back.) The entire lower bar is empty giving me room to "stage" my outfits for a work week.

After living like this for a couple of weeks, two things have surprised me.

1) Laundry is much simpler. (I kept very few things that need dry cleaning.)

2) Because I created a capsule wardrobe on a limited color pallet, it is really easy to create "new" outfits on the fly mixing in scarves and changing up the jewelry. The rest of the clothing I kept is in an under-the-bed box. I only kept pieces I loved and most are seasonal. I'm considering it my inventory of spares so that I can replace or rotate pieces as they wear out. More on the capsule wardrobe next.
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Side note: for those of you have been following, why yes, that is Samax Amen's Starving Artist print on the wall. It is hung at my eye height for daily inspiration when I'm getting ready in the morning.

Of water and blessing

2013-04-19T06:00:00.000-05:00

I read a book by Masaru Emoto once called the Hidden Messages in Water.

The idea behind the book is that as the temperature of frozen water rises and ice starts to melt, crystals emerge for just twenty or thirty seconds. Emoto began photographing these crystals.

He tested different types of tap water, water from ponds, streams...distilled water. But the breakthrough came when he began to test the affects of music on water. The experiment was simple. The water was put in a bottle then set between two speakers. Classical music resulted in well-formed crystals with distinct characteristics. In contrast, the water exposed to violent heavy-metal music resulted in fragmented and malformed crystals.

The music's effect could be explained by vibration, but Emoto tested something further. He wanted to know if simple words could change water. In Emoto's research, they did. According to the book, water exposed to ‘Thank you’ formed beautiful hexagonal crystals, but water exposed to the word ‘Fool’ produced crystals similar to the water exposed to heavy-metal music, malformed and fragmented.

I don't know if Emoto's research bears up under scientific scrutiny, but in some ways it doesn't have to. For one thing, it changed Emoto's life and the way he sees the universe. He has become a passionate believer in the beauty and responsiveness of water.

For me, I've begun to wonder if there isn't a physical aspect to blessing food—beyond what thankfulness does for our own hearts. What if the blessing of food actually makes our bodies more receptive? Is there a tangible change to the food itself?

I wouldn't set up a soap box on that idea, but it is something beautiful to think about. And it has definitely made me more mindful of the practice of blessing.

Never forget we are in a war

2013-04-17T05:00:00.001-05:00

The battle isn't over ideas, modes of worship, politics or dress.

The battle is about choosing love and kindness over fear and cruelty.

Our training happens in daily practice. Interactions with store clerks. Frustration in traffic. Family dynamics. We practice love and kindness in these small things, so that when evil scores a big win we are already trained to respond.

We are very much a part of this battle, and it can be easy to get discouraged. It takes intention to choose a side.

The End of the Scooter Experiment

2013-04-15T06:00:00.000-05:00

So, this weekend marked the end of the Scooter Experiment. Besides being a very economical mode of transportation, I also gained some other benefits:

1. Because riding a scooter requires all your concentration, it actually makes the commute less stressful. There is no multitasking.

2. I love the outdoors. There is something about wind, sun and smells that I miss in most of my day-to-day-life which is spent indoors.

3. It is worth it to try stuff--even if your friends think it is a little "out there."

The financial benefits were well worth the scooter experiment. We were able to pay off a long-standing debt and accomplish some things we wanted to accomplish. But I think the thing that is the most meaningful to me are the intangibles. It has forever changed my commute. Even in the car, I drive the residential streets with the windows down. Oh yeah, and I put my phone in the glove box.

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AND...the winner of the Crazy, Sexy Giveaway? Preston! I'll be in touch via Facebook to get the mailing address.

Crazy Sexy GIVEAWAY

2013-04-12T06:00:00.000-05:00

Want to win a free copy of Kris Carr's Crazy Sexy Kitchen?

Here is what you need to do to enter:

1. "Like" Random Cathy on Facebook. (If you've already liked it, move to steps 2 & 3.)
2. Comment below to let me know that you are a fan.
3. Share your favorite Random Cathy post on your Facebook page.

The winner will be announced on Monday, April 15 at 6:00 am and I will connect with you via Facebook to get your mailing address to send the book.

I have a mad girl crush...

2013-04-10T05:00:00.000-05:00

I have a mad girl-crush on Kris Carr.

In fact, as much as I love my job—and I ADORE my job—if Kris Carr called me to work for her in content development, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Activist, guru, and simply fun personality, Kris is on a mission to change the world. She is getting people to give up their Cheetos and embrace green juices.

Clear, articulate, and most of all, likeable...she is living it. Diagnosed with a rare and incurable Stage IV cancer affecting her liver and her lungs at the age of 30, Kris decided to become her own advocate. She discovered that we are killing ourselves with our lifestyle. Ten years later, she is thriving and deeply enjoying life. And not only did she change her own path, but she is devoted to developing resources for others.

Sign up for her newsletter at http://kriscarr.com/ and get the Crazy Sexy Manifesto. It is a fantastic blueprint for implementing healthy change in your life. Or order the book my sister bought me for my birthday (which is how I discovered Kris) Crazy Sexy Kitchen: 150 Plant-Empowered Recipes to Ignite a Mouthwatering Revolution.

Let Kris inspire you to start your own personal revolution.

Update on the Spending Fast | Month 3

2013-04-08T05:00:00.000-05:00

Month 3 is where the spending fast switched from creating awareness to creating annoyance. In other words, all the shiny wore off of it.

Things I broke down and bought...
- A Smart Car (yeah, kind of a big one)
- A new pair of yoga pants.
- A sketch pad and art journal book to play with on vacation.
- Bubble tea.

Things I miss...
- Trips to the Denton Community Market.
- New clothes just because they are fun.
- Amazon.com

This is probably the part of the fast that is supposed to "do its work." In any case, July seems very far away.

On neglect...

2013-04-05T06:25:00.000-05:00

A friend of mine talked about "neglect" this week. And ever since she said that word, it has sort of hung with me.

My mom is currently in a nursing home. Years of "neglect" have resulted in a body that cannot walk due to unmanaged diabetes. Not only that, but I'm pretty sure my mom neglected her heart too. I don't know that she ever took the time to cultivate her dreams or pull the weeds of old hurts and sorrows.

As John and I talked about it, I wondered if it were generational or cultural. Was the religious culture we were raised in so focused on service to others that we weren't allowed to take care of ourselves? My mom is very giving and caring for others.

John had a different thought. What if the problem wasn't the "service to others." What if the problem were the desire for perfection? In the religious culture I was raised in we were to avoid any "appearance of evil," but what resulted was a pursuit of the "appearance of perfection." Problems weren't acknowledged. And if everything is apparently perfect, then there is nothing to take care of.

In order to care for ourselves, we need a relentless pursuit of the real. I'm recently convinced that one of the most powerful prayers we can pray is: Holy Spirit, I am willing to see.

Neglect is just a form of blindness. It isn't that we don't care. It is simply that we don't see.

A birthday snapshot...

2013-04-03T05:00:00.000-05:00

I just turned 47 yesterday. It somehow seems weird to say that. Inside I feel like I'm not really a grown up, I just "play one on TV."

Birthdays make me introspective. Here is a snapshot of where I am right now....

I've learned I enjoy teaching. Not just yoga, but anything that is interesting to me. I'm not sure I fully understood before how teaching others results in more learning for yourself.
I need more friends who eat like I do. Food is such a social activity. I love it that the yogis are interested in vegan cuisine so that I'm not always the one modified for.
My personal yoga practice is deepening and growing me in ways I don't yet have words to articulate.
Sometimes it is the simple things. I really enjoy the times when it is just me, John and Pepper doing the mundane.
John and I have had the opportunity to "be parents" recently--something that isn't a daily occurrence when you have grown children. I treasure that.
I came to the end of my "scooter experiment." While it has been really fun and I've learned that I can do it, I really hate being cold.

A flagrant violation of the spending fast...

2013-04-01T05:30:00.000-05:00

This weekend, I bought something.

Something big. (In terms of dollars.)

But small. (In terms of transportation.)

Guess what?

I love it!