But hey, as of today, we’re onto the 2nd uprising! (Have you <a href=”http://revoltnowfitness.com?affiliates=d9d4f495e875a2e075a1a4a6e1b9770f”>signed up?</a>) The next 4 weeks are going to bring a lot more trials & tribulations. But why on Earth am I willing to do this again? Let’s look at the measurements!

Weight: 241.6 = -2.8 from last week (4.8)

Neck: 36.2 = -.2 from last week (1.2)

Arm: 38 = STS (3)

Chest 108.5 = STS (3.5)

Waist 92.5 = STS (7.5)

Stomach 110 = -5 (14)

Hips 126 = -1 (5)

Thigh 74 = STS (4)

Bringing this week’s loss to 8cm or 3 inches.

You might’ve noticed another figure after this week’s results. Those, my friends, are the total loss for this uprising. In total, in just the last 4 weeks, I’ve lost 4.8 lb’s (healthy 1.2lb’s/week!), 38.2cm or 15 whole goddamn inches around my body. I’ve gone down a dress size and a half, and I’m feeling all kinds of better.

Results speak louder than any blabber I might have. Trust the program. Because it works. You don’t need that gym membership; this is where I’ve built up my musculays;

in my living room, in the middle of all the clutter that is there. Everything gets shoved to the side whilst I’m squatting, lifting, hopping and sweating my ass off. All I’ve needed are two free weights (5lb’s. Any kettlebell exercise can be done with a freeweight!), a gym ball & an exercise mat. Even that is optional; this is a brand new addition to my home “gym”! I’m used to hopping about on our wooden floor, in my tootsies (as socks just slide about everywhere!).

Best thing about working out at home? Watching Hollyoaks at the same time. Although my squat schedule is at times interrupted by all the necessary shouting (“can you not see it was HIM?! HE did it! Daaaaamn!”).

The 2nd uprising starts with 1 week Detox. Which I will not be doing, by the way. Just because I tried it in the beginning of last Uprising, but could not complete. It’s just not worth it for the headache, and the hunger, the grumpiness and constant ill feeling. It’s good when you’re just starting out a new healthy eating regime, but for me, it’s just not worth the trouble. With Revolt!, you make your own choices. And it’s never a wrong choice.

I’m going to leave you with a few thoughts that one of the girls doing the program posted on the Revolt! facebook page:

*I was given access to Revolt! programme for 12 weeks, in exchange for blog posts, however my thoughts are my own, beit positive or not.

At 8am on a Sunday (Who knew that there’s an 8 am in a Sunday? I normally wake up round about 12 if I want to get up early…) and set off for a trip towards a small town called Elgin. We made a small detour via the Thainstone car boot sale (if you’re ever in Aberdeenshire and looking for a good car boot sale, this is it. We toddled around for an hour, and saw about 1/4 of the tables.), but mostly we were hotfooting it towards our end destination.

(and let’s not talk about how many times we ALMOST DIED due to the stupidity of other drivers. I mean, who overtakes in a corner? Or who tailgates a car with P-plates, driving at the speed limit? Stupid, stupid, STUPID people!)

You see, we’ve not done much towards the wedding in a while. In all honesty, the last year has been a bit of a non-wedding zone. Nothing’s more has been booked, and very little has been bought. With a year and a bit to go to our wedding, it’s very easy to become complacent. “we still have time” is a dangerous concept! So, we’ve decided to do the final bookings. This includes the cars, the buses, block-booking of hotel rooms for the guests, the cake and the PA system. Everything else can be bought & made little by little (as we’re doing our own decorations, there’s no florist/day-of coordinator to book!).

So, why did we travel to Elgin? Surely booking anything 75 miles away from our wedding venue would be counter-intuitive? Well, turns out that it’s not.

In the beginning of this year, we went to the biggest wedding expo you can find in Aberdeen. We’d booked our venue, photographer and I knew where I was getting my dress from. So there wasn’t much to find. Cake was one of the things we were looking for (hel-lo free cake!), and we found one. She’d just set up her business two months before, and it was her first wedding expo.

Don’t get the wrong idea though; she’s done cakes for YEARS, it’s just that she used to live in ‘murica (the U, S of A for those of you not down with the lingo of kids these days), and didn’t start her business over in the UK after moving across.

At her booth, she had a couple of samples of cakes she can do, and they were stunning. For her tasters, she gave out cupcakes. Her portion sizes were bigger than other cake makers, and absolutely delicious! The only problem was that she lived so far away. The delivery charges would be shocking.

Before our meeting with her, I sent her a couple of inspiration pictures;

(all pics from Google – can’t remember where as I’ve had them on my computer for a good while!)

There’s a definite theme there, eh?! Pink & black (our colour scheme), most of them delicate, almost vintagey designs. But we had a challenge for her; we wanted buttercream icing. No fondant to be found anywhere. Cakemakers kept on telling us it cannot be done with our designs in mind. It wasn’t possible and it wouldn’t look good. Andrea disagreed.

So, armed with our pictures and some ideas of how the cake should look, we went to her wee shop and discussed cake. And boy, did we make the right decision. She was able to pick out what we were looking for, and we ended up deciding on an absolutely fantastic design, using some of the ideas in the inspiration pictures, as well as a cake she’d done that week. You’ll have to wait for the wedding to see the actual design though; some of our guests read here and I don’t want to spoil the surprise. Suffice to say though; it’s going to be amazing.

After an hour and a bit of talking cake, we headed back home, a few hundred pounds lighter and with a box of cake in hand. And, look what arrived today as well!

t/l to t/r; lemon, chocolate, vanilla

b/l to b/r; toffee, red velvet, chocolate orange More cakes! Lovingly wrapped in plastic cupcake holder-thingies, still intact even after going through the Royal Mail trail! The bottom picture is of her Red Velvet cake – yum-myy! Suffice to say, there is only one of the 6 left. And its future is questionable as I’ve got a hankering…

So, let’s talk about pricing. With our design and the size of the cake (~70 dessert-sized portions; 3 levels -6/8/10), we were looking at around £600 for the cake.

£600

For cake.

I’ll just let that sink in for a while.

You okay?

Survived?

Well, our cakemaker (Glamourcakes) has to charge us for delivery. Which is £130.

Ouch.

Expectations were high. I’d probably have to go on the game to pay for this bleeding thing. We’re talking intricate design with complicated sugarcraft & unusual designs.

BUT

(Wait for it)

In the end…

we put in a 50% deposit, at £230.

Our cake, INCLUDING delivery will be £460.

£140 saved by going out of town. Result!

And the thing is, we’re not compromising anything. In fact, we’re getting the most delicious cakes I have ever tasted (by far!), an original design, and wonderful service.

I believe I’m in love!

However, that last cupcake is calling my name… Want a piece? Tough. You can’t have any. Actually, I’m not sure if I’ll want to share at the wedding either. I think it’ll be Costco cake for our guests whilst we sit there, admiring our actual wedding cake, before taking it up to the honeymoon suite and completely demolishing it in about 5 minutes.

Who’da thunk wedding cakes were so complicated?!

why does nobody do bras with mismatched cups? As in, you’ve got a 34″ waist, L-B R-C. So your left cup would be a ‘b’ and your right one a ‘c’. Cos, you know, surely there are people whose puppies are a bit… Lopsided.

Me for an example – left one is DD, right’een an E. When looking at them, you can’t see the difference. When I chuck them in an over-the-shoulder-boulder-holder, the left one fits all snugly and the right one always takes a little gander to the outside world. It would be nice to have them both tucked in nicely.

I think I may have an idea for Lord Sugar…

But I can’t do it today. Simply because despite what I said last week, I never got back on the wagon. There was too much driving going on, and too much excitement. So, the food prep didn’t happen, and the exercises didn’t happen.

That’s life though; sometimes things just get in the way. And if you’re not prepared, you’re going to get off-road, majorly.

I’ve learned though. Not for this week as I’m doing all my foods etc. on a day by day basis, but for next week.

Prior Preparation Prevents Piss-Poor Performance.

I just need to follow the five P’s. And I’ll be fine. Not just diet-wise, but blogging-wise (I really have to start scheduling some posts! I used to write up ideas during my commute, but now I’m driving, it ain’t happening!), and life-wise.

Back to normal tomorrow. Maybe. If I get round to it.

At 12 pm on Sunday, we took a 15-minute bus ride that ended up costing us a heck of a lot. Because we came home with a wee nipper…

That’s it in all its beauty – not the very same car, but the same model, in the same colour. Beautiful, isn’t it? It’s a used car, and a bit more than a tad grubby on the inside, but it’s such a nice drive, and in the end – it’s a bloody car!

I’ve cut my commute in half. And I don’t have to smell other people. I can sit there, light up and smoke, WHILST ON MY COMMUTE!

When it’s hot, I can put the aircon on. When it’s cold, I can put the heating on. And I can blast my stereo, yowling along to a crappy cd. It’s ace.

I know very well that it’s a novelty that will wear off in the next few weeks, but meanwhile I’m enjoying it. I’m loving the freedom, and goshdarnit, I’m driving everywhere.

So, I’ve spent the last 3 days just driving. Nowhere exciting, just to shops that we otherwise couldn’t get to (Hel-lo Costco!), and just around town.

Do I even need to say that everything else has taken a back seat (no pun intended)? Blogging, reading, TV, the diet… All in all, I have not been a good girl at all. The diet has totally gone out of the window. I mean, I’ve been eating within my daily calories, but I have not been eating particularly healthy, and it shows. It’s carb central over here, and it is NOT good. Don’t get me wrong – when it’s going in my mouth, it’s goo-ood, and when it’s in my mouth, it’s goo-ood. But when it’s past that, it’s not so good. I am bloated, I have a constant stomachache, and things aren’t as… normal… in the bathroom as I’d like (sorry for the TMI!). It makes me wonder if I was like this all the time – I can’t remember, it feels like ages ago! And in all honesty, I do not want to feel like this ever again. So, as soon as I’ve finished this blog post (and the slice of pizza), I’m going to go and prep my garlic chicken for tomorrow’s lunch, and I’ll be back on it.

Besides, Revolt works!

I’m going to give you this week’s results in a minty.. But first. Want to try this Revolt thing? Hop onto their website and Nichole will give you a week for free. Nutrition plan, yummy recipes and brutal but effective workouts. FOC. None pounds. Try it, and you’ll love it! Afterwards you can sign up and reap the benefits. How much do you pay for the gym at the moment? £20 a month? 30? 50? Add to that the fact that you do your own food plans. You never know exactly what foods to put together. How can you make sure that you’re going to be full from breakfast to lunch? For $10 a month, Nichole will do all of this for you. $10 is what, 8 quid? 3 months is $27 (or £20 methinks?), and a year is $50. For a month’s gym fees you can get a year of Nichole kicking your butt. Do it. Now. You’ll hate me for it. But you’ll thank me for it.

But… Here’s this weeks’ measurements + results (I also track online on Myfitnesspal, so if you’ve got an account there, add me so we can be friendsies!)

Weight: 244.4 (-1.8. I actually did a sneaky peek this morning, and I’d dropped to 242, so another 2 pounds gone. We’ll count that next week! )

Waist: 92.5 (-1.5)

Hips: 125 (-2)

Thigh: 74 (-2)

Arm: 38 (STS)

Neck: 37 (-1, lost the cm I “gained” last week)

Stomach: 115 (-5)

Chest: 108.5 (+.5)

All in all, it’s a loss of 12.8cm, or about 5 inches I think?

So guess what.. In three weeks, I’ve lost 18 inches all over. 18! If that ain’t a result, I don’t know what is!

See below for other posts from the wonderful Revolt bloggers. And if you’re a Revolt blogger – LINK UP!

But I’m going to say it again; just in case.

I don’t do exams/tests very well.

When I was at uni, when all my classmates would head to ‘The Bobbin’ (the uni local) for a pint, I’d take a bus home and spend the evening nursing a humongous headache. You see, my stress levels very well profess themselves physically. I have a bad habit of grinding my teeth in my sleep (it’s called bruxism apparently. I really should get a mouthguard before I ruin my teeth completely..) and when I’m not concentrating on NOT grinding my teeth. This then leads to increased tightness in my jaw, which then leads to headaches & tightness in the shoulders. From the shoulders the tightness then moves downwards until the stress stops. During the final weeks before I handed in my dissertation, my whole body was so tight I couldn’t turn my head, and walking felt like someone was stabbing me each time I took a step.

So it can be said that I don’t deal with stress very well.

Add in driving as well. You know, where you have to pay attention, and if your attention wavers, you could potentially kill someone. That is NOT the ideal situation.

But I had to do it.

Because of reasons. The day had come; it was time for my driving test.

The culmination on 10 months and 66 hours of driving at the cost of £1824.

My hands were shaking & I was chain-smoking all morning. Stepping into the car was a terrifying experience.

But once I sat down and started up, I relaxed. Moving towards the test centre wasn’t terrifying; I had done it before. We’d driven those routes before and I had my instructor with me, barking at me for my non-existent mirror usage. It was familiar, and it was comforting.

None of that during the actual test drive though. My instructor wasn’t with me, and he was in a bad mood. He didn’t do anything to calm my nerves, and it was terrifying. I made stupid mistakes that I wouldn’t have done normally. About halfway through my drive I’d given up hope on passing, and with each sigh from the examiner, any hope of driving away in my own toot toot within the next few weeks just withered away.

WRONG!

Passed. Not with flying colours, but not by the skin of my teeth either. A comfortable halfway mark. I’m okay with that.

Now to buy something shiny. Because I have things to do & places to go to.

Toot toot. Watch out. Cos I’ll be on the roads, y’all! I might’ve convinced one silly person that I can drive. But in reality? Don’t think so…

There are weeks when you feel great doing your new exercise routine.

And then there are days/weeks when you absolutely hate it. You struggle shoveling salad in your mouth, and if you see any more chicken, you might very well throw up.

With Revolt, you’ve got a community behind you. You’ve got your (very active!) facebook group cheering you on. And Nichole is there all the way. She’s active in the facebook group, giving you advice and talking you through troublesome spots.

It’s still not easy though. It never is. It probably took years to pile that weight on, it’s not going to go away in a few days. It’s a lot of hard work, and there are days when you just wish you could give up. The exercises are too tough, the food too bland. You’re missing chocolate and nothing is going right.

This is all in your head. It really is. Have a positive attitude towards your routine, and things feel a heck of a lot easier. The exercise are hard, but think how good they are for you. Think of how you’ll feel in a few weeks when you can feel the muscles in your body. Think of how light you’ll feel in a few weeks when it no longer takes so much effort to carry yourself around as your muscles have grown.

The food is good for you. You’ll have a lot more energy and need a lot less sleep. You’ll feel a lot less bloated, and you won’t suffer from lack of food. Your skin will be less dry and those pesky spots you’ve been getting will just disappear. For me, the headaches I’ve been getting regularly for years are slowly but surely disappearing. It’s amazing what two weeks of clean eating can do!

Keep your mind on the end goal, and you’ll get through the bad days, bad weeks. This isn’t just for Revolt; it’s for life in general. Keep at it and you’ll succeed. If you give up, you’ll get absolutely nowhere.

So, this week’s results:

Weight: 246.2 (+.4lb)

Neck: 38 (+1 – think I measured from a different spot this week?)

Arm: 38 (-1cm)

Chest: 108 (-2cm)

Waist: 94 (stay the same)

Stomach: 110 (-9!)

Hips: 127 (stay the same)

Thigh: 76 (+1)

Bringing this week’s losses to -10cm, or 4 inches. Not as impressive as last week, but still a great result! I’m feeling it too – things are sagging a bit less and my trousers are feeling looser (still not lost enough to swap to a smaller size though). Let’s hope I’ll keep on losing at this rate, and my 12-week final measurements are going to be fantastic!

(next week on top of my Week 3 results, I’m going to tell you a bit more Revolt and what’s the whole ethos of it. And how you can join! (as I’d highly recommend it. After my 12-week free cycle ends, I will still keep going. Because this is just too good to let go.))

I’ve been spared of such horror. Mainly because I don’t have that many followers. I suppose if I get a few (hundred)more, this “anonymous” will find his/her way to my blog as well. But I’m not here to talk about this “anonymous” person. I’m here to talk about spammers. Well, one in particular.

What I’ve found that the spammers are amazingly positive about your blog. No matter what you write about, your blog is always very informative & they use it for their college essays. Even the post where I talk about getting my period.

Until the other day.

Because I got an email through to my inbox, asking me to approve a comment on a post of mine.

“certainly like your website but you have to take a look at the spelling on several of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling problems and I find it very troublesome to inform the truth nevertheless I will surely come back again.”

Thanks, spammer. Thank you for liking my website, and thank you for criticizing my spelling. Most of all, thank you for surely coming back again.

Spot the sarcasm?

When did spammers start sending semi-mean comments to random blogs? Surely they’ll get a lot more traffic onto their pseudo-official blog/website through being nice & finding everything incredibly useful when they’re writing those amazing articles to amazing website magazines on their amazing desktop computahs?

Never mind me, I’m just depressed because my spelling is bad & troublesome for some. I’m going to go and eat some pie now. (not really. It’s not cheat day until tomorrow!)

It’s been a pleasant, wet experience. I’ve just had a wet, steaming hot hour-long session with my newest love in the world.

The shower.

You see, I’m not sure whether I told you this. But we’ve been shower-free for the last 3 weeks. It started with a temperamental shower which then decided it was time for it to go to shower-heaven. And we were stuck in bath land.

Baths are fun.

Once a week.

Twice a week.

Maybe even three times a week if it’s been a particularly tough week.

But when it’s 6.30 in the morning and you have to wait 15 minutes for the bath to fill up with lukewarm water as your partner’s used most of the hot water when he had a bath earlier… It isn’t too much fun. It isn’t fun AT ALL.

The first week, you deal with it. You drag the martini shaker from your kitchen to the bathroom so you can get SOME running water on your hair to get it somewhat washed.

The second week, you’re already bored of it. It takes too much time in the mornings, and when you’re doing a new exercise routine, lowering yourself to the bath hurts and your arms end up giving away, making you phwlomp into the bath, making stormy waves all over the bathroom floor.

The third week you’ve totally had enough. Enough, enough, enough. You have no more bubbles for your bath, and your hair is starting to feel a bit grimey from the conditioner build-up from all the conditioner your martini-shaker cannot banish. (and let’s not talk about what people might think about you when you have cocktail-related accessories in your bathroom)

So when you finally get that email, telling you that when you get home from work, there will be a fully functional shower waiting for you, you cannot concentrate on your work, and your legs shake a bit when you get on the bus to go home.

So, again, I do apologize, but I have plans for the next half an hour. I’m sure the novelty will wear off, but for now…