How To Be An Optimist

Optimism and Whatever...

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 18:55:00 +0000

You might have come across the saying "Oh, she's a true "Psalm 31 Woman" but have you heard about the "Philippians 4:8 Positive Thinker?" I have been meditating lately on various presenters I hear in Church or on DVD who go beyond the usual 'great sermon' or 'motivational presentation' who open my ears to something beyond meeting my own needs. What do they say out loud in this age of sage advice and inspiration overload that re-boots a keen desire to serve others as Jesus did-- to let hurting people know that there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother/sister?

Today it came to me that the presenters I am most inspired by (or lately, at least) are living out the recommendations of St. Paul to the Philippian believers:

King James

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

New King James

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.

21st Century New King James

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report, if there be any virtue and if there be any praise, think on these things.

NIV (New International Version)

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Today’s New International

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

NAS (New American Standard)

Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.

The Message
Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious—the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realized. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

Amplified Bible

For the rest, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is worthy of reverence and is honorable and seemly, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely and lovable, whatever is kind and winsome and gracious, if there is any virtue and excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think on and weigh and take account of these things [fix your minds on them].

Contemporary English

Finally, my friends, keep your minds on whatever is true, pure, right, holy, friendly, and proper. Don't ever stop thinking about what is truly worthwhile and worthy of praise.

American Standard

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honorable, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

New International Readers’

Finally, my brothers and sisters, always think about what is true. Think about what is noble, right and pure. Think about what is lovely and worthy of respect. If anything is excellent or worthy of praise, think about those kinds of things.

My husband and I read the passage aloud from different translations above. Put all the wonderful descriptors together and you have a vocabulary well worth meditating upon and, under the words is the Word, Jesus Christ, the only true embodiment of all of these characteristics. You have a solid, positive guide to making choices that will uplift, encourage, and inspire. Others and yourself. And you will notice those other "Philippians 4:8 Positive Thinkers" you come across in your life.

Some Exercises Towards Becoming a Philippians 4:8 Positive Thinker:

Take your favourite translation of the passage and commit it to paper. Place it around your home and on your car visor, etc. so that you are able to memorize it to share with others, to repeat when you are feeling less than positive.
Make an effort to use Philippians 4:8 as an assessment guide around what movies you choose to watch, what books you pick to read, how you relate your day's events to your spouse, the dinner table conversation you engage in, etc. __________________________________________

The Descriptors from Philippians 4:8 (different versions)
true honest just pure lovely of good report virtue praise noble praise-worthy right admirable excellent honorable of good repute worthy of praise authentic compelling gracious best beautiful things to praise worthy of reverence seemly lovable kind winsome admirable holy friendly proper truly worthwhile worthy of respect

**Bible image courtesty of abcdz2000 via sxc at http://www.sxc.hu/gallery/abcdz2000
With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Prepare for the Best- Building Optimism in Your Children

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Thu, 06 May 2010 17:45:00 +0000

by Sheila Gregoire

Pessimism and optimism are character traits that our children are born with. But that doesn't mean that we have to accept them! Steering our children towards optimism helps them embrace life better.

Last summer, for instance, my family took a trip to an orphanage in Kenya. Before leaving, we were all required to get several shots. Being a parent who believes in full disclosure, I told my kids when I made the appointment. Big mistake. Rebecca, my older daughter, took it in stride. Katie, my younger one, didn't sleep for a week. Rebecca laughed at her mercilessly.

Then came the big day. Katie went first, and she didn't even flinch. She said, at the end of it all, “that wasn't that bad." And Rebecca? We had to peel her off the ceiling.

Optimistic Kids vs. Pessimistic Kids

Afterward, I asked both of them which was better: to worry incessantly about something that may turn out badly, or to not worry at all, and then be surprised when life kicks you in the teeth? In other words, would you rather be a pessimist or an optimist? Would you rather trust and have faith, or would you rather worry? Pessimism believes in preparing for the worst, just like my youngest daughter did. She cried, she worried, she visualized, she whined. That way, she said, there was no way it could possibly be as bad as she imagined.

Preparing for the Best is more Fun

Optimism, on the other hand, is embodied in my Rebecca who, as a firstborn, thinks she's invincible. Nothing bad is really going to happen, so when it does, boy is she surprised. She may not handle it as well as Katie, but she still emerges on the other side. I tend towards the Katie side of life myself, but in watching Rebecca, I really believe life would be a lot more fun if we all prepared for the best, rather than the worst.

Pessimistic Children Lose Out on Life

That doesn't mean we should all be carefree; just that if we're so focused on the bad that may happen, we may miss out on the good. And we're far less likely to try new things or take those big leaps because something-we're never sure quite what-may be lurking just around the corner. So we live a safe life. A comfortable life. But not a very big life.

Pessimistic Children are Risk-Averse

An aversion to risk is closely related to pessimism. My Katie, as talented as she is, won't take dance lessons, though she dances around the house. She might not like it, you see. She didn't volunteer to do a solo in the Christmas play, though after watching all her friends do it, she remarked she could have, after all. And the piano competition we entered them in this year? She dreaded it, until it came time for her to play. As we were leaving, she said, “that was actually kind of fun. Can I do it again?" After listening to her whine about it for two weeks, I almost strangled her. Those kids who have a “prepare for the worst" personality need to be pushed to try new things. But once they do try these things, and the sky doesn't fall, they're more likely to do it again.

Create Opportunities to Kick-Start Optimism

Require your pessimistic child to do at least one new thing every season. For Katie it has meant certain sports and certain competitions, but in your family it may be something else. Support them through it, encourage them, pray with them, and even quit if it becomes too much. But make the effort. The more a pessimistic child is stretched, and finds out that the world actually is fun, the more optimism can grow.

Pessimism is not a fixed personality trait. Continue to nudge your little one towards new adventures, and encourage them to aim for the sky. You just may wake up one morning to hear your child say, “I just can't wait!". And that's a moment I'm looking forward to as well!

Sheila Wray Gregoire is the author of four books specializing in marriage and household organization!
To encourage responsibility in your children, get your FREE household organization charts,
including kids’ chore sheets, family organization checklists, household planners, and more!

Article Directory: http://www.ArticleSlash.net
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Brits are Demonstrating Saving Optimism (Nationwide)

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Wed, 28 Apr 2010 19:57:00 +0000

Article Submitted by: Sam Gooch

Wednesday, 21 April 2010

Britons are taking an increasingly positive view towards saving money, research from one building society shows.

People appear increasingly willing to make use of savings accounts, if a new set of figures are anything to by.

Data released by Nationwide in its latest Savings Index revealed an overall score of 94 points for March. Not only is such a figure three points above that recorded in the previous month, it is also 15 higher than the tally of 79 noted in March 2009.

Such growth appears to be driven by an increased propensity for regular saving, as some 51 per cent of people now claim they are setting cash aside into UK accounts on a regular basis, up three percentage points from February. Meanwhile, an increasing number of people believe government policy is encouraging them to set aside money for a rainy day.

And having a particular impact on people's opinions on saving, however, appears to be individual saving accounts (ISAs). With March the last full month consumers had to invest in the account before the end of the fiscal year, the building society claims many people have focused on making the most of the tax-free savings that such products offer.

The building society goes on to report that two-thirds of the total ISA business in the savings industry takes place between February and May, making March a particularly popular month to make use of such products. However, with the next financial year now underway consumers may be keen to continue making contributions to such products.

Andy Hutchinson, head of savings for Nationwide, states: "Now that the new tax year has started, some savers' attention will be switched on to saving as early as possible in an ISA to maximise their tax benefit. With this in mind, it wouldn't be a surprise to me if the Savings Index rose again in April. There has already been a nine-point increase since January 2010."

With such comments in mind, those keen to make use of an ISA could be well advised to be aware of how much they will be able to place into such accounts. Recent research from Clydesdale and Yorkshire Banks showed nine out of ten (89 per cent) Britons are unaware of how much they can place in the tax-free savings products, while one-fifth state they did not know they could make regular deposits into such accounts rather than investing lump sums.

Article Source: http://www.ArticleBlast.com

__________________________________________ With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Good News for Post-Menopausal Optimists: You Live Longer

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Sun, 28 Mar 2010 20:07:00 +0000

Thursday, April 23, 2009
by: Reuben Chow, citizen journalist
See all articles by this author
Email this author

(NaturalNews) A large study conducted by researchers at the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine and presented at the American Psychosomatic Society's annual meeting in Chicago has found that optimistic post-menopausal women were healthier and lived longer than their less upbeat counterparts.

Details and Findings of Study

The study team, which was led by Hilary Tindle, an assistant professor of medicine at the University, had looked at data from almost 100,000 women who were part of the Women's Health Initiative, a study which follows women aged 50 and above and has been ongoing since 1994. On average, the women's health status was tracked for a period of about 8 years.

The researchers defined "optimism" as the expectation that good things, as opposed to bad things, will take place. It was found that such women had 14% lower risk of dying from any cause and 30% lower risk of dying from heart disease during the study's follow-up period, as compared to their pessimistic counterparts. In addition, the optimists were less likely to have hypertension and diabetes, as well as to smoke cigarettes.

The study team also looked at another trait - the tendency to be "cynically hostile" towards other people. Women with this trait were more likely to agree with statements like "I've often had to take orders from someone who didn't know as much as I did" and "It's safest to trust nobody." Generally speaking, such a tendency indicates an overall mistrust of people.

Women in this group also suffered poorer health, having 16% higher risk of dying from any cause and 23% higher risk of dying from cancer during the follow-up period, as compared to women who were the least cynically hostile.

Significantly, even after the researchers accounted for influencing factors such as health status, lifestyle, income, education, physical activity, alcohol consumption and cigarette smoking, the same trends remained, with optimists enjoying better longevity than pessimists. The researchers are unclear if negative attitudes do indeed directly cause poor health, although their findings do imply an association of some sort.

Being Optimistic and Positive

And it's not just about health. Optimists, it seems, are better achievers in life, are better able to cope with stress, and can take on life challenges more resiliently; these traits had been revealed in previous research.

For the skeptics, consider the following point. In his book "Being Happy!", author Andrew Matthews points out scientific experiments showing the incredibly powerful and toxic effects of negative emotions. When blood samples from people who were experiencing serious anger of fear were injected into guinea pigs, the animals dropped dead within a mere two minutes.

Now imagine what the toxins created by negative emotions such as anger, fear, frustration and stress are doing to our own bodies on a daily basis. It is arguable, but these toxins could even be more potent health-destroyers and killers than the external poisons we ingest, inhale, and absorb every minute of every day.

For people who are somewhat naturally upbeat and positive, the findings of the Pittsburgh study will come as good news. But those who tend to be a little more negative and easily discouraged should not fret, because, according to some experts, optimism is a trait that can be picked up and applied.

Some useful suggestions for becoming more optimistic include staying away from negative environments, staying in the company of persons with brighter outlooks, and focusing and celebrating one's strong points instead of concentrating on the weak ones.

Stay cheerful!

References

Optimism May Have Life-Extending Benefits (http://www.healthnews.com/family-he...)

Optimists live longer and healthier lives: study (http://www.reuters.com/article/heal...)

"Being Happy!" by Andrew Matthews
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About the author

Reuben Chow has a keen interest in natural health and healing as well as personal growth. His website, All 4 Natural Health, offers a basic guide on natural health information. It details simple, effective and natural ways, such as the use of nutrition, various herbs, herb remedies, supplements and other natural remedies, to deal with various health conditions as well as to attain good health. His other websites also cover topics such as depression help, omega 3 fatty acids, as well as cancer research and information.

**above image courtesy of Horton Group

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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Positivity: A Working Definition

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Sat, 13 Feb 2010 02:39:00 +0000

by Wendy Strgar

I believe, in some ways, agitating for social change is the most positive form of thinking there is. In order to do so, we must believe that one person can make a difference, that our opinion is worth voicing, and that the world can become better - if we are willing to make an effort to shape it that way.” Barbara Ehrenriech

Every now and again I get suggestions about topics for the positivity quest. I have been pondering Barbara Ehrenreich’s latest release Bright-Sided and how her important criticisms and well pointed shortcomings of the practice of positivity impact my own goals to change my mind. Ms. Ehrenreich is trained in biological research and her previous works put her at the forefront of the pack in underlining the realities of social inequity.

It was during her own recent battle with cancer that the prevailing therapeutic model of positive thinking came to enrage her. She was indignant about the idea that her cancer and the “barbaric” chemo treatments that she endured were in her mind, sugar coated to be a wise teacher. Bright-Sided starts with her questioning the scientific method and findings of studies which support the correlation between positive mind training and health crisis outcomes. She then expands the critique of positivity to include the many ways that in her view, the current cultural mechanism of expecting positive mindsets is equal to silencing the opposition and demanding complacence.

In her worldview, positive thinking places the blame for any life situation on bad thinking practices. She links positive thinking to the 70’s new age thought and the more recent magical “secret” thinking that sells big in waves. All of these positive thinking movements “blames the victim.” Whether the illness is physical disease, mental instability or socio economic poverty and despair. She traces the roots of positive psychology to many right wing, conservative organizations like the Templeton Foundation whose primary aim has been in maintaining the status quo.

In reflecting on her position, it occurs to me that the question she is asking about positivity is not properly framed. Her version of realism juxtaposes negativity and positivity. Re-framing the issue by reflecting on the relationship that the individual has to their life situation is a more helpful view of what positive thinking can bring to life. From a Buddhist perspective, situations are always neutral. They come in all shapes and sizes and realistically provoke an equally wide range of emotions including painful and difficult challenges of grief, loss, sadness, disappointment, anxiety and fear.

True positivity would never look to dismiss or diminish the honest experience of these emotions. Applying positive thinking to these emotions gives them an opportunity to move through you and transform your relationship to yourself and the world. Negative thought can often leave you stuck with the feelings and unable to see the range of choices available to you.

Human brain development is unique in all mammals because of our ability to think about how we think. Choosing a positive relationship to your personal situation in life gives you the advantage of looking for the love, peace and joy that we all hope for in our time on the planet. Illness can be a profound wake up call and the process of healing can present life transforming evolution which is true whether you live or die.

Even considering the vast extremes of socio economic realities that much of humanity lives in, studies have shown that this is not the final determinant in happiness or life satisfaction. Poverty of stuff is not always equal to poverty of spirit. Extreme wealth does not ensure happiness, wisdom or peace. The capacity for positive thinking is not magical thinking or wishing- it is about choosing how to relate to what is happening to you. Human empathy and the capacity towards altruistic action are not determined by a person’s net worth.

Mother Teresa was a channel of life energy and resources that she did not own. She is a good example of where positivity is grounded in truth and action in the world. After her death records of her own pain and doubt were uncovered. She did not live a Pollyanna positivity, facing the illness, poverty and death around her, but she chose to see the light in people that were lucky enough to meet her. How people deal with life situations has everything to do with whether or not they are open to learn something.

Choosing to find moments of joy, meeting people who are awe-inspiring and being graced by experiences of gratitude are ways of seeing that change you and give you the potential to make both your immediate world and the larger community better. They are defined as positive because they retain a reverence for life and hope for the highest part of who we can be.

Wendy Strgar is a loveologist who writes and lectures on Making Love Sustainable, a green philosophy of relationships which teaches the importance of valuing the renewable resources of love and family. Wendy helps couples tackle the questions and concerns of intimacy and relationships, providing honest answers and innovative advice. Wendy lives in Eugene, Oregon with her husband, a psychiatrist, and their four children ages 11-20.

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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Optimism is One of the Benefits of A Good Sleep

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 23:57:00 +0000

For the optimist, there are amazing benefits to routinely getting a good night's sleep. Encouraging news for anyone who might be having sleep problems: if you successfully overcome whatever is preventing you from sleeping soundly — either on your own or with a sleep specialist's assistance — you have a lot to look forward to.

Recent research outlines the improvements that can come with treatment:

According to a 2004 study in the Archives of Internal Medicine, subjects with chronic insomnia who had five sessions of cognitive behaviour focusing on proper sleep techniques reduced the average time it took to fall asleep from 68 minutes a night to 34 minutes. Many persons with sleep difficulties have reported wonderful results using energy psychology (eg., Emotional Freedom Technique or Meridian Tapping). You will find a number of helpful articles by going to the EFT web site

People with sleep apnia who used CPAP for one year reported quality of life increases that brought them to the same level as the general population, according to a 2004 study in Chest.

Sleep review

For such a natural and necessary thing, sleep is the source of much anxiety Here are some basic steps to follow if you're having trouble maintaining normal, healthy sleep patterns:

Practice good sleep hygiene, such as making sure your bedroom is sleep-friendly, avoiding caffeine, alcohol and TV news before bedtime, and going to bed and waking up at the same time every day
Make sure you're getting proper treatment for any underlying illnesses, such as cardiovascular disease or diabetes, that may interfere with sleep. Ask your health care provider about dietary ways to deal with your health concerns.
Keep a sleep diary to look for patterns you may not be aware of and to track progress.
Make sure your primary care physician is aware of any over-the-counter or pharmaceutical medicines you take to help you sleep.

So if you're struggling to get a good night's rest, there is much cause for optimism. While there's no guarantee you'll always get eight hours of uninterrupted sleep, with the right information and resources, you can reasonably expect improvements in both your nighttime sleep and your overall quality of life. ~content for this article is adapted from content provided by the Faculty of the Harvard Medical School

With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Weight Issues and Optimism

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 21:36:00 +0000

It is possible to be optimistic as someone who is somewhat obese... AND to be unhappy and pessimistic as someone who is not obese.

While there definitely IS an upsurge in the rates of obesity in our society--almost twice as many women as men who are not overweight think that they are. 25.3% of men and 47.9% of women defined as within their normal weight range think they weigh too much. The group least forgiving of itself consists of white women between 40 and 59 years who are within their target weight range—a full 59.6% of these women are convinced that they are overweight when they actually aren't.

If you are unsure of whether your perception of your being overweight is distorted, you could calculate your Body Mass Index, or BMI. Go here to find out how you can do that: http://www.nhlbisupport.com/bmi/

Source: U.S. National Center for Health Statistics, unpublished data covering 1988–1994.
** Image of singer Karen Carpenter. Karen was one of the first celebrities to die from Anorexia. Karen perceived herself to be "fat". Go HERE to see Todd Haynes movie about Karen and her body image (done with Barbies).
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Taking Charge of Your Health: What Optimists Do

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 20:39:00 +0000

As with so much to do with the powerful mind-body connection, if you believe you are healthy, you feel usually feel healthy-- research actually shows that optimists with this set of beliefs about their health live longer than pessimists whose doctor has given them a 'clean bill of health'. And what about the study at Duke University that asked 3,000 cardio patients to indicate whether they rated their health as "poor", "fair", "good" or "very good"... those rating their health as "poor" were more likely to die in the three years following the study than those who chose "very good".

Manage your PERCEPTION of your health and you will be managing your health! Optimists truly believe that they have power in their own lives to make changes and go forward. This "internal locus of control" influences attitude and behaviour. Optimists are more likely to opt for "healthy" changes in their lives-- try a different diet that has solid evidence of being helpful in achieving results, exercise more, etc. Optimists value good health.

Do you have this "high internal locus of control" (i.e., do you believe that you have a high level of control over various aspects of your life)? To find out how empowered you are, go here and scroll down to the questionnaire.
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

The Optimist and the Health Diary

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 00:39:00 +0000

Wow, how many times have you gone to your health care professional and when s/he asks "when did you first notice...?" you really have to double-guess yourself? Or you move to a new community and have to do your health history all over again with someone new... would it not be nice to have a small health diary you could consult? A place where you mentioned the first time you were alarmed with ______ and what it looked like and what you tried to alleviate the symptoms and what the effects of that were? You guessed it-- keeping a health diary, particularly if you have a chronic condition, such as Crohn's Disease, is a smart way of taking charge of your health.
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Optimism and Taking Control of your Own Health

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Fri, 29 Jan 2010 23:39:00 +0000

Back in the 70s I recall reading a book called The People's Pharmacy where I was told that there were things I could do to take charge of my own health-- that I didn't need to run to a doctor when I didn't know what was going on. Man, I gobbled all those self-help books up.

In later years, I began to look at several alternative models of self-care... and I believe that I have at the very least met at least one person who has tried something of everything out there : )

Optimists are more apt to look into health issues early (maybe just by researching them on the Internet), follow through on the advice of their respected health care provider, and eat healthy and exercise. The pessimist is more apt to take a fatalistic attitude-- "everybody is going to die sometime-- I could quit smoking and then step out onto the street and be hit by a truck!"

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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Optimism and Physical Health

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 22:48:00 +0000

Today we are well aware of the connection between our minds and our physical bodies. I remember as a teenager hearing my mother and her friend complaining about their ever-complaining friend... she had this, she had that, her husband did and said this, her kids never...blah blah blah. The more down she got, the less attractive she was to the very people she sought out as supports. Not long after my memory of the gossip,
she became ill, it was discovered she had breast cancer, and she died.

Fortunately, the mind-body connection can also work the opposite way. If you take care of yourself-- eat well but not too much, exercise, get enough rest, you will likely have a positive outlook on life. I know that when I am crabby that if I take a short nap, I am good to live with after that : )

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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Reframing the Negative for the Optimist

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 22:07:00 +0000

"Positive Reframing" is the technique optimists use to find the positive features of an apparent negative situation. Once you have practiced 'reframing' a couple of times you will find that it comes almost naturally. If you are around an active group of re-framers, you will learn even faster. Look for a positive support group-- anything from a group on Children's Literature at the library to an aquafitness class at the local pool to studying the Gospel of John with a Church group... Reframing reduces distress and anxiety and gives one the boost of confidence that is often the motivation to overcome the problem regardless of how challenging it might look.

The table below has some examples of how you can flip words over to reframe certain situations. When you start to feel pressured or tense in a situation, try to use reframing to look at the situation differently.

Negative Oulook	Positive Reframe
stubborn	determined/tenacious/ambitious/committed
stingy	thrifty/fiscally responsible/disciplined
bossy	a leader/an organizer/visionary
loud	uninhibited/gregarious/extroverted/
shy	quiet/thoughtful/deep-thinking/reserved
picky	attends to details/fastidious/thorough
won't follow rules	creative/innovative/has leadership potential
talks too much	outgoing/problem-solves verbally/sociable/knowledgeable

**structure for above table is found at http://edis.ifas.ufl.edu/fy517
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Celebrity Advice for the Optimist

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 21:05:00 +0000

When one is relaxed and able to access the right hemispheres of the brain to do some creative problem-solving, one will find that exercises that take you off your usual neuropathways can often provide profound results. Here is a venture that is particularly fun and productive with another person (with synergy, 1 + 1=3+) contributing.

1. Clearly define the problem

2. Choose five celebrities you admire and look up to because of their life experiences and philosophies and/or skills. Have each of the famous persons give you a piece of advice from their perspective.

3. Now imagine taking the advice-- what do you imagine the outcomes would be? Go as far as to imagine what the steps might be that would allow you to actually apply your favourite "celebrity advice" to your problem. Notice how laughter aids in the creative process.

4. Whenever you feel discouraged, depressed, or stressed out, think of different perspectives to bringing yourself back to the attitude of optimism that you desire.
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Setbacks & the Optimist

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 05:24:00 +0000

You know how Thomas Edison put up with his setbacks? He apparently experimented over 10,000 times before producing the first incandescent lightbulb and when asked about the repeated "failures" he replied, "Oh, I have not failed-- I have found 10,000 ways that do not work."

Edison was the quintessential optimist. We not only can benefit a lot from his inventions, but also from the way he dealt with failure. Setbacks can actually bring you closer to your goal-- can you believe that?

Cope with Failure

"Failure" is part of learning. Believe that you have what it takes to overcome the obstacles that will (inevitably)land in your path. Here is an inspiring story from the BBC Devon:

A woman from Devon who finally passed her driving test after 23 years is now hoping to use her wealth of experience to help others.
Maria McCarthy from Sidmouth ripped up her L-plates after taking about 250 lessons, which cost her between £2,000 and £3,000.
The 42-year-old said getting her licence has given her a "badge of adulthood" and changed her life.
She has now written a book aimed at helping other women succeed.
'Terrifying' ordeal
"When I started learning to drive, I absolutely hated it," she told BBC News.
"I was quite good academically, but I knew immediately I wasn't going to be a natural. I was so clumsy.
"It was taking all the things I'm bad at and putting them all together.
"I was an aid worker in Romania, working in dodgy areas and seeing some really awful things, but I didn't bat an eyelid. Driving was something else entirely."
Her saving grace was a stubborn streak which would not let her give up, but she said her two driving tests were the "most nerve-racking experiences" of her life.
"I was a bit like Scarlett O'Hara in Gone With the Wind - shaking my hands at the heavens," she said.

If I'd asked my instructor if I could put in for my test, he would just have laughed at me

Maria McCarthy

When she finally passed her test two years ago, she set out to write her book - The Girls' Guide to Losing Your L-Plates - because of an "evangelical desire to spread the word".
The book has information, advice and some humorous anecdotes.
"I wrote about a woman who booked five tests, but failed to get out the test centre for three of them because of nerves."
Ms McCarthy said the reason it took her so many years to pass her test was simple.
Automatic success
"I just wasn't prepared. If I'd asked my instructor if I could put in for my test, he would just have laughed at me."
She finally passed her test at the second attempt after swapping to an automatic and taking a period of intensive lessons.
Ms McCarthy has presented her long-suffering driving instructor with a copy of her new book.
"He was quite pleased when I passed my test, but I think he was glad to see the back of me."

You can learn quite a bit about failure just by reading the above and thinking over how Mary ultimately handled the "notoriety" that surely came from taking 23 years to get her driver's licence.

Believe that you WILL SUCCEED next time.

Remember not to take the 'failure' personally-- true optimists don't blame themselves for failures but are ready to take the credit for success... that they do take seriously and personally!

Just keep on truckin' as we used to say back in the 60s. Edison is famous for the quote that "Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration"

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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Optimism When You Are NOT Living An Abundant Life

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 06:29:00 +0000

You probably already know that the Law of Attraction says that you can create your own reality. What you might not know is that the reality that is created is controlled by something much more powerful than your conscious mind.

In this one of a kind program, you will soon discover that your subconscious mind occupies 85% of your brain power. How many times have you started working on yourself using the Law of Attraction, only to discover that after a couple of days, you get frustrated with the lack of results?

How would you like to put an end to that brilliant sabotage and FINALLY take control of your own life and destiny?

Imagine what you could do if you could double or even triple your income... Earlier I asked you to think about what it would be like if you could create the world of your dreams. Can you feel the excitement of being in control of what you do with your time and money?

Ask yourself these questions:
What am I waiting for?

What am I afraid of?

With the "Secret of Intentional Wealth" you will take a journey into yourself. You will learn to decode the messages that are being sent from your subconscious mind. With this new knowledge, you will be able to move forward into the life of your dreams. Interested? What does the Optimist in you say? Click here to find out more.
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

More on Optimism and Abundance

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 06:12:00 +0000

As you have probably noticed, there is a lot of overlap between optimism, abundance, and the principles of the Law of Attraction that we read and hear so much about.

Perhaps you have watched "the Secret" numerous times and bought a bunch of Law of Attraction materials but for whatever reason, you just haven't been able to "manifest" the abundance that you know is awaiting you.

Dr. Carol Look, a conventionally trained psychotherapist has worked for a number of years using the energy psychology technique called Meridian Tapping or Emotional Freedom Technique. She states:

What if you were finally offered the right tools that really work to clear your blocks to attracting success and abundance into your life? My personal passion and professional specialty is helping people attract success and live fulfilling and prosperous lives by combining the cutting-edge energy therapy technique called EFT with the Law of Attraction. I will teach you advanced versions of these techniques to help you raise your vibration and release the blocks and limiting beliefs you have absorbed, inherited, adopted or picked up during your lifetime. Find out more about the Abundance Tapping that Carol does by clicking here.

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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Optimists and an Attitude of Abundance

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 05:44:00 +0000

Abundance could be described as being satisfied with what you have while being able to strongly envision what you desire. If you have an attitude of abundance you believe that there are more than enough resources to go around-- this can be a tough concept to deal with in this time of economic upheaval that we are all exposed to.

You are likely familiar with the idea of the "Dream Board" or the "Abundance Collage". Next to my computer I have a dream board that is made up of images of what I hope to see manifest over my life: pictures of two women on scales, one plump, one slender (and I have the statement beside this: "I choose to weigh a HEALTHY, youthful, sexy, agile, slender, delightful 130# by July 30, 2110" and "Nothing tastes as good as being slim feels". I also have a picture of a man and woman screaming around on bikes with huge smiles on their faces, a picture of a woman doing Yoga, a medieval-looking street in an English village, a couple walking with their dog that is captioned "Learn new ways to have fun", and another picture of a rag-to-riches fellow with the headline: "Never quit, and will conquer". As well I have statements that read: "I believe in Jesus and Jesus believes in me", "Your wealth can last for Generations", "Keep doing what you Love" and "Financial Freedom and Stability" in a long green strip along the bottom of my board. At some near future time I will take some time to assess whether I want to expand on the current board. You can try something like this as well if you like.

1. Find a relaxing place to start your project, perhaps with music and soft lighting or candles, and maybe with a pot of herbal tea.
2.Take a stack of magazines and tear out pages that contain images and statements that you appreciate now or would like to have in your life. (I collect magazines over the course of the year that have great images and inspiring stories-- seniors magazines do that for me... my local library sells their overflow magazines for 20 cents. I also like seed catalogs)
3. Put your collage somewhere where you will see it often. Take a couple of minutes to enjoy what you already have each time you look at your collage.

-Over the next couple of days I will provide a couple of other ideas for harnessing abundance that you may not have considered. Stay tuned!
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Optimism and Gratitude

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 02:47:00 +0000

Even though it is challenging to be reminded, when we are down, that we have much to be grateful for (a roof over our heads, etc. etc), this is precisely what needs to be done. Here is an exercise to help you to recognize and celebrate your many blessings:

1. Write in your Optimism or Gratitude Journal what you have to be grateful for in your life. Write anything that occurs for you. Start with the basics (food, clothing, shelter, family, friends, etc.) Then list recent positive events, goals you have achieved, or some near-time that kindness has been received.

2. To jog your memory, take a walk around your home... use all five senses. Perhaps you are grateful for the internet, for a particular piece of music, a lovely meal you have just eaten, or your health.

3. Looking at your list, consider all the ways that each listed item has enriched your life. Find a way to express your gratitude to the people on your list.

4. At the end of the day review your blessings and fall to sleep thinking about them!

Amazon.com Widgets

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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Take Your Optimism Wherever You Go...

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 13:21:00 +0000

Before we get to the blog proper, I would like to announce an exciting opportunity to download a FREE mp3 to take with you on your run or busride or whatever... Brian Johnson's Zaads Notes about positive proofs of the effects of Learned Optimism... today click here and download away!

Who would you rather hang around-- the person with an optimistic attitude or the person who is always complaining and fearful? You can have that pervasive optimistic attitude that will prepare you to anticipate success and bounce back from setbacks. The Internet has a lot of wonderful resources for you to learn to tackle problems with confidence and imagination!

Tip for Today: Read autobiographies and biographies of successful and adventurous people and study how they overcome their challenges through efforts and attitudes. If you are less into reading and more into the visual, then visit a bright and beautiful exhibition at an art gallery, walk through a gorgeous formal garden like the Butchart Gardens in Victoria, BC, or watch some of the free documentaries about inspiring people online. Attend "introductory" motivational presentations that are usually free (promotions for more expensive presentations). I once saw and heard motivational speaker Brian Tracey for a good hour-- I have since read all of his books and was impressed by his suggestion to spend 10% of everything you earn on your own education and self-improvement.
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Logging your Optimism

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Tue, 19 Jan 2010 01:18:00 +0000

Journaling is always an excellent method to monitor progress. Get into the habit of regularly making entries--write down your feelings, build your confidence, increase self-awareness and watch your self-image grow in positivity.

Record your reactions to key events in your life. As yourself questions such as, "What did I tell myself about this?", "How would an optimist explain this situation?", "What am I grateful for today?", "What did I worry about today?", "What was today's break-through?" You might be interested in downloading this Optimism for Mental Health 3.1 Diary and making the adjustments that you want.
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Positive Self-Talk for the Optimist or How to Shave Off 25 Pounds

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 00:30:00 +0000

Did you know that your most important conversations are those that you have with yourself? We have an adult son living with us-- he's an inventor and I often ask, "Say, what?", thinking that he is talking to me... but he inevitably answers, "Just talking to myself, Mom". It's pretty funny, but you know, these self-conversations of his are instructive and encouraging... at least the ones I hear him engaging in.

Unfortunately, not all of our self-talk is positive. What we need to do is to recognize that our self-talk reflects our emotional state. And our emotional state affects our mental and physical wellbeing, right?

Here is a handy little object lesson that helps to clarify just how often we rag on ourselves, and gives us a simple way to shift from negativity and self-injury to more positive, kinder self-talk.
1.- Place two jars on your work desk, near your computer, on your kitchen counter... wherever it is that is your hub for most of your day, one filled with pennies or buttons or beans, the other empty. Everytime you are aware of a negative thought, transfer a marker from the full jar to the empty one. At the end of the day which jar contains the most markers?
2.- The day after this exercise, list 28 negative things that you think about yourself, eg., "I'll never get this HTML code". Take 28 index cards (one for each day of the next four weeks) and write a positive version of the negative phrase on each card (eg., "I can ask my son to help me this HTML code".)
3.- Put each day's card where you will see it often. Whenever you see it, read it (aloud, if possible) 5 times
4.-At the end of the 4 weeks, repeat Step #1-- are there fewer markers in the negative marker jar?

With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Sun, 17 Jan 2010 01:09:00 +0000

Is it REALLY possible to learn to be an optimist if you are a little on the curmudgeonly side and say, in your 50s? Well, interestingly, the proof that optimism can be learned comes from studies that show that pessimism can be learned...

Psychologist Martin Seligman exposed dogs to mild electrical shocks that they could not escape. After a while the dogs gave up. In the next stage of the experiment, the dogs were given opportunities to escape. Did they? You guessed it-- NO. And while the applications of findings in this experiment has proved to be a lot more complicated and controversial when moved from canines to human examples, Seligman and co-researchers showed that loss of motivation, confidence, and trust is a sure-fire way to guarantee apathy, despair and a pervasive sense of failure.

However, after showing the development of pessimistic thought patterns Seligman set out to prove that it is equally possible to learn how to think like an optimist. Children in a treatment center with a "depression" diagnosis were taught techniques for coping with challenges using optimism. After two years, ALL of the children in this particular group had been moved off the "depression" diagnosis. Here are 4 of the techniques that were used in the Penn Prevention Program:

Thought-Catching - learn to identify and arrest any defeating thoughts-- check out that "inner tape"-- when you are depressed, stressed or sad.
Thought Evaluation- Pick out the inaccuracies of the thoughts you have when feeling depressed, sad or stressed
Accurate Explanation- Switch your negative and inaccurate thoughts with more positive, realistic ones
Decatastrophizing- Instead of being paralyzed by the possible disasters, focus on solving the problem at hand

And, although I will be talking about it later, I will state briefly here that I believe that the energy psychology called Meridian Tapping or Emotional Freedom Technique is a much quicker method of dealing with releasing your chronically stressed, depressed, sad feelings and becoming more sunny-natured. We will talk about Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) in posts to come! Go here to read more about this simple, easy to learn and apply meridian tapping technique-->emofree.com

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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Just How Optimistic Are You?

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Sat, 16 Jan 2010 05:01:00 +0000

As you read this post you may be thinking back to a recent time when you reacted-- good or bad-- to an event in your life. While it is helpful to examine some of our behaviours to see how we measure up as an optimist, there are actually a number of tests that have been devised by psychologists to do just that, and that are offered here free on the Internet.

Martin Seligman devised the Attributional Style Questionnaire originally as a measurement of prospective success of applicants to become life insurance sales people.

The Life Orientation Test was designed to measure the degree of tendancy to believe that over time one will cope better and be more successful than not. Click here to take this short test.

If you happen to score higher on the Pessimism end of things, please don't despair! The Internet is teeming with opportunities to learn to be an optimist... and you can practice in "real life". If you want daily tips, please subscribe to this blog. If you have comments or questions, please post them (you can do so anonymously) below.
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.

Reality and the Optimist

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 06:14:00 +0000

It seems clear that optimists live more interesting, fun-filled lives and actually do achieve more of their goals. They live longer than pessimists in general. However, some optimists are idealistic, with an airy-fairy world view and can lose focus and drift in an infinite opiate haze of unreality. This is when hooking up with a pessimistic buddy ("the critic") can be helpful. (I propose that we are talking about a LOVING critic and not referring to children with their tender egos.) Here is a story of Walt Disney that illustrates my point:

The famous Walt Disney paid testament to the importance of having an internal critic as well as an internal optimistic during the creation of some of his most spectacular work. By combining the two mindsets, Disney was able to produce balanced work that was well grounded and equally ambitious.

~Mind Sport Live_________________________________________

How does an Optimist cope with Grief and Sadness?

noreply@blogger.com (Cynthia) — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 06:10:00 +0000

Grief is, in its simplest form, a sense of loss. We can experience loss every day-- everything from a loss of self-esteem ("I can't zip up my favourite jeans any more!") to the more classic traumatic grief of the death of a loved one or a serious injury or illness. Although we each grieve in different ways and on different schedules, we commonly deal with a number of impactful and painful emotions: anguish, distress, anger, shock, confusion, despair and guilt. When these emotions hit, an optimistic point of view is particularly helpful.

While optimism cannot prevent the feelings associated with loss, the skills of an optimist certainly come to the fore to help cushion the blows. Accepting and expressing loss is healthy, and drawing something positive from the experience is an optimist's forté. Learning what our strengths are as a result of loss is positive in our continued development as human beings. Coming to terms with a loved one's death and actually addressing the coming loss with the loved one is often very comforting for the person saying "goodbye" and the person letting go of this life. The following chart shows strong indications that there is greater health to be found in releasing strong feelings than in repressing or suppressing them:

World Research Links Cancer To Repressed Feelings

A team of researchers at Stanford University in California found that women who repressed their emotions were more likely to show disruptions in the normal balance of the stress hormone cortisol, compared with those who did not. Earlier studies have shown that the unbalanced cortisol fluctuations can predict early death in women with breast cancer that has spread to other areas of the body.

"People who have repressive styles tend to be more prone to illness, particularly [immune-system related] diseases, such as rheumatoid arthritis, infections, and cancers. The concept is of unexpressed anger. If one doesn't let it out, that could have adverse consequences." [University of California Los Angeles]

"Extreme suppression of anger was the most commonly identified characteristic of 160 breast cancer patients who were given a detailed psychological interview and self-administered questionnaire. Repressing anger magnified exposure to physiological stress, thereby increasing the risk of cancer" [Journal of Psychosomatic Research]

"Extremely low anger scores have been noted in numerous studies of patients with cancer. Such low scores suggest suppression, repression, or restraint of anger. There is evidence to show that suppressed anger can be a precursor to the development of cancer, and also a factor in its progression after diagnosis." [Cancer Nursing - International Journal]

A 1979 study comparing long-term survivors of breast cancer with those who did not survive, scientists at John Hopkins University found that long-term survivors expressed much higher levels of anxiety, hostility and other negative emotions. Patients who were able to express their feelings lived longer than those who had difficulty in doing so. [Journal of the American Medical Association]

In a study conducted at the University of Colorado in the US, researchers found that people who repressed their emotions after a traumatic event had lowered immune systems compared to those who shared their feelings.

"Our work suggests that emotional disclosure may influence immune responsiveness as well as having general health benefits. We are investigating the effects of emotional expression in women with breast cancer." [University of Auckland Medical & Health Sciences]

Cancer surgeon Dr Ryke-Geerd Hamer from Germany has examined 20,000 cancer patients with all types of cancer. Dr Hamer noticed that all his patients seemed to have something in common: there had been some kind of psycho-emotional conflict prior to the onset of their cancer - usually a few years before - a conflict that had never fully resolved. Dr Hamer started including psychotherapy as an important part of the healing process and found that when the specific conflict was resolved, the cancer immediately stopped growing at a cellular level. Dr Hamer believes that cancer people are unable to share their thoughts, emotions, fears and joys with other people. He calls this "psycho-emotional isolation". These people tend to hide away sadness and grief behind a brave face, appear ‘nice’ and avoid open conflict. Some are not even aware of their emotions, and are therefore not only isolated from other people, but also from themselves.

*The above information comes from Cancer Counseling at Alternative-Cancer-Care.com
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With gratitude, I base this blog on the book "Learn to be an Optimist: A Practical Guide to Achieving Happiness" by Lucy MacDonald, a Quebec-based motivational speaker with an academic background in psychology and counseling.