A Day In The Life

Is innovation dead?

2009-11-10T15:48:00.002-06:00

It's a vague question but in the current rather dire times where the economy seems to be stuck in neutral and you're supposed to "just be happy you have a job at all" it seems that innovation has taken a back seat to survival. When's the last time something at your place of employment was truly an innovation? When was the last time you saw truly innovative programming on one of the big four television networks?

Think about that last one for a minute. This is the year that gave us a second NCIS series on CBS. We were given a spinoff of the animated Family Guy series on FOX. NBC generously gave us a burned out and stale Jay Leno 90 minutes earlier and without a damn desk. ABC even dug up a series from the 80s and re-imagined it - and "V" is back again tonight, it's probably the one retread I actually like. They claim survival is the reason and that this is "what people actually want" but if they were actually in touch they'd know what we truly want or that we're only watching some of those rather pathetic offerings because it's the best of the worst. If they hadn't gone through multiple decades of greed and sure cash, they'd be more willing to innovate.

But it doesn't stop with television. Innovation seems to have come to a standstill in all forms of traditional venues. Radio, outside of The Current locally, sucks. Hell, saying that radio sucks is being generous. Radio, in all its sameness from sea to plastic-filled sea, is less innovative today than it was a decade ago and that's quite a feat.

Most of the blame for the sameness and lack of innovation from traditional venues is placed squarely on the internet. Yes, the internet is a great venue to try an idea for next to nothing in terms of monetary expense but the internet is also vast and can be rather tough to gain traction in terms of what could be considered a mass audience. I have found some success with MinnPics and its unique twist on a photo blog but that's even small potatoes. The big audiences, for whatever reason, still lie with those traditional venues. Maybe it's due to convenience. I can see that because the computer has yet to truly make its way in to the American living room and replace or meld with the television. That time is coming but it will take some level of innovation for a computer/TV hybrid to become mainstream. And then there's the connectivity issue - we're pretty much at the mercy, still, of the cable companies who control high speed internet access. Rather than offer truly high speed access at an affordable price, they price it high enough that it's still cheaper to shell out the bucks for cable television because streaming something full screen is jittery and full of more hiccups than Otis the drunk from good ole' Mayberry, R.F.D.

So while innovation isn't dead it is definitely being stifled by greater powers. After all, if there's money to be made on something old why on Earth would someone spend time, energy and money promoting, developing and being innovative with something new?

Speaking of new, MinnPics has some new photos posted today - even a couple discovered via Twitter. Check it out for yourself.

Who used the restroom before me?

2009-11-09T15:24:00.000-06:00

"Wow it smells in here. I must be in the wrong restroom."

As I opened the door, I peeked around it expecting to see a graphical depiction of an elephant with the phrase "ELEPHANT" below it. Nope, it says "MEN". I'm apparently in the correct place.

"This just isn't right. There are two cans of Oust air sanitizer here, there's no reason for it to smell this terrible. It's a hate crime for any place inhabited by civilized humans to smell this bad. Did someone tape a dead fish under the counter?"

I decided to crouch down and verify the potential rotting seafood scenario. It didn't pan out.

"My skin is beginning to itch. This has to be some sort of insidious chemical attack. What kind of bastard would carry out a chemical attack on a restroom in a suburban office building?"

I investigated as much as one can investigate a 7 foot square room and found nothing out of the ordinary that would even lead one to believe that a chemical attack was underway.

"Someone must have upper-deckered in here."

Afraid to pop the cover off of the toilet tank, I hurriedly went about my business and wondered to myself, "who used the restroom before me?"

MinnPics is back after a warm Minnesota weekend with another week of stunning photos from all corners of the state.

Project Runway sends the Minnesotan home

2009-11-06T09:50:00.000-06:00

I won't say that I've watched the entire season of "Project Runway" on Lifetime because I haven't. I have, however, watched the final fifteen minutes or so of each episode because it always amazes me who gets "aufed" by Heidi Klum and her band of fashionistas.

Chris Straub, or Shakopee as I call him (because he's from Shakopee, MN - represent!) did amazingly well early in the competition. He actually won the first competition and I was excited to see that someone from Minnesota - especially the suburbs - was recognized for their creative skills. Then, as the series went on, Straub seemed to be strung along. His work wasn't terrible but the judges consistently billed it as such but kept him in the competition. It seemed almost mean for Heidi Klum and her band of fashion divas to keep Shakopee's Chris Straub on the show as they kept berating his designs. He was a near-permanent fixture in the show's bottom two or three designers.

I hoped that Straub was being strung along for a good reason. Hopefully they realized that he had immense potential. I rarely saw huge negatives in Straub's designs but maybe I'm just a homer who hates seeing the home team lose.

Then last night, on the final episode before "Project Runway's" big Bryant Park Fashion Week finale, Chris Straub was eliminated. The judges sent two designers packing leaving three young women to duke it out in New York City on next week's episode. So for many months now Shakopee's home town deisgner has been working away in the basement of his townhome - which us graphic designers in my office have determined the general location of - creating new fashion trends on his own. The difference is that he now has a significant amount of national television exposure to help his career. Something tells me that he'll be alright.

If you are fond of Minnesotans and all things Minnesota, check out MinnPics to tour Minnesota via photographs.

Jails vs. Schools: which one benefits society?

2009-11-04T11:17:00.001-06:00

Back in my old hometown of Austin, MN the school levy referendum failed. It would have raised taxes $84/yr on a $100,000 home. To many, any additional money paid in taxes is too much but this is the same city that approved the construction of a $30,000,000 jail/justice center shared by the city and county. In contrast, the school levy referendum would have provided the school district with just over $1,000,000/yr. in additional operating funds.

Which of the two - schools or a jail - benefits society more in the long run? Schools prepare the next generation for jobs. Those buildings need to be stocked with equipment and teachers who are at the top of their game - they need to be of the highest quality and the best of the best. Schools serve the children of everyone and everyone who has ever reached the age of five has benefitted from schools - the majority benefitting from public schools which are taxpayer funded.

Then there are jails. They are filled with people who didn't see the value or need to abide by our city, state or nation's laws. They are arrested, booked and placed in jail. Some go to trial while many serve their time and consider it their debt to society for doing wrong. In either case, they stay in these buildings on the taxpayer's dime. I see no reason why a jail needs to provide anything beyond the most basic of necessities. The simple fact that jails have televisions anywhere inside them is nothing short of excessive to me. I don't care if the televisions are for employees, visitors, stray cats or those who are locked up - a television is a luxury and is unnecessary if you are being punished for a crime. And housing law breakers in a $30,000,000 building is so far beyond excessive that I can't even think of words for it.

Why do we feel the need to spend $30,000,000 on a building to house criminals when there are millions and millions of square feet of warehouse and commercial space sitting vacant? Is our government so spend happy that even those who many see as the bottom rung of society need a special building to live in at the expense of others? How many cities and counties require their inmates to actually work doing something while they serve their time? I know for certain that in Scott County (Minnesota) the inmates spend every waking hour indoors at the jail. To some the simple fact that they are not allowed outdoors adds to the punishment but I feel that working to pay your debt to society builds more character and could actually lead to a better place for them down the road than sitting around for days on end doing little to nothing.

Yes, inmates, prisoners, criminals - whatever you choose to call them - sit in relative luxury doing nothing while our schools who are asking for far, far less in the way of operating funds have to do without. They do without modern computers and they do without the best teachers because the best teachers realize that they can make more money in private schools.

So, which one - jails or schools - would you rather have your tax dollars spent on?

After you ponder that question, check out the equally compelling MinnPics and take a photographic journey through Minnesota.

Christmas comes AFTER Thanksgiving

2009-11-03T10:34:00.000-06:00

It's apparently Christmas. I found this out yesterday as I sprinted through the local Target store for a bag of cat food. I realized it was Christmas yesterday, November 2nd, because Christmas had relentlessly vomited across from the general area of the pet supplies. Christmas had vomited so much, in fact, that it was running in to the area where the Halloween candy and remaining costumes had been relegated to. I knew it was coming because after the back-to-school supplies disappeared in the second week of September a back-wall aisle popped up entirely full of Christmas goods.

Yes, Christmas had in fact been lurking inside the walls of Target since early September and I hate that.

It's not that I hate Christmas. Entirely the opposite, in fact. I love Christmas. My house is that house during the month of December. I deck it out classily in white Christmas lights and a Santa's Village scene because it makes kids smile and I don't mind freezing my ass off dragging all of that stuff out from the basement each year. I just don't display all of my Santa-riffic goodnes suntil an appropriate time. The day after Thanksgiving. In case retailers and shoppers everywhere have forgotten, Thanksgiving celebrates the day that the pilgrims and Native Americans sat down and shared a bountiful meal in celebration of the year's harvest. We celebrate it on the final Thursday of November. Then the next day we feverishly plow full-on in to Christmas mere hours later but at least Thanksgiving gets its moment in the spotlight.

Well, at least it used to. I can understand and even tolerate retailers having Christmas displays up shortly after Halloween. It's big business and those advertising dollars that retailers spend keep my bills paid. But if we can find time to recognize such stupid crap as Administrative Professionals Day then Thanksgiving deserves its own space and time without being whored up by the commercialism that is Christmas.

That means no Christmas music - no matter what - before Thanksgiving dinner is over.
Don't turn your Christmas lights on until the day after Thanksgiving.
Decorate the inside of your house whenever you damn well please but be aware that others will ridicule you for having garland and tinsel adorning your home on November 10th.
Keep indoor Christmas decor away from windows visible from outdoors until after Thanksgiving.
Turn off outdoor and dismantle indoor Christmas displays by January 2nd. A grace period of three days is available if you partied like it was 1999 on New Year's Eve.

All I'm saying is that holidays don't overlap. Keep them separate and if KOOL 108 or Lite FM start spinning Christmas music this year before Thanksgiving is over I am going to drive to their respective studios (closets with a computer inside) and smash that Christmas computer into tiny bits fit for decorating the station's Christmas tree.

I also promise to keep MinnPics seasonally appropriate. The photos of Minnesota will always be pleasant and compelling and rarely induce anger.

Fitness clubs as a status symbol

2009-11-02T12:36:00.000-06:00

Everyone has some awareness about status symbols. We see the douchebag sporting personalized license plates driving a Mercedes Benz fast enough to both get noticed and pulled over. We see someone wearing a $300 t-shirt but only because they casually mention its cost in conversation at a louder-than-normal volume. Then there are less obvious status symbols. Take gyms and fitness centers for example.

In the past five years the Twin Cities area has experienced a huge boom in fitness clubs. The original full-service gym - Northwest Athletic Club - is a piece of history. It's been replaced by the far more prestigious Lifetime Fitness Club. Around these parts Lifetime is sort of the gold standard for full-service gyms. Older stalwarts such as Gold's Gym are trying to make inroads but they are facing the Rainbow Foods situation - it's difficult to change habits of Minnesotans and Gold's Gym has that image of roided up weightlifters thanks to t-shirts from the 1980s - Lifetime Fitness is the status symbol (to me). Any place with monthly dues over $100 for one person is considered as a luxury and a status symbol by your's truly.

Of course there are a ton of other options like Anytime Fitness and Snap Fitness. A membership there is $30-$40/mo. It's not lofty but it's still not the cheapest. However, I'm willing to bet that the equipment at these strip mall fitness clubs is at least similar to the equipment found by the status symbol seekers who populate Lifetime Fitness. The cheapest that I've seen in the fitness club game is a strip mall outlet in Excelsior or Shorewood - somewhere along Highway 7 on the south shore - advertising $9/month memberships. That, for me, is the price where it negates having your own elliptical trainer taking up precious space in your basement or home office.

The final piece of the fitness game puzzle is the community aspect. Most cities have a community center or YMCA. The community centers are generally rather cheap for monthly memberships. The thing they lack is exclusivity. The memberships are affordable enough that Joe and Jane Average can afford a family membership. Their 2.5 kids are busy with swimming lessons and they are going to ride home together in their 2002 Dodge Caravan minivan. The only difference is that they live just a block away from Doug Douchebag and his 2009 Mercedes Benz. So who's the one living life with a bunch of status symbols?

I, for one, am happy with the occasional run through town and time training on my Wii Fit and driving one of our two Toyotas.

I'm also happy curating MinnPics. The amount of amazing photography from Minnesotans is shocking and deserving of your attention. Check it out today.

The myth of low grocery prices

2009-10-28T11:30:00.004-05:00

Every big metro area has that one local grocery store chain that claims to be the low price leader. Their weekly newspaper inserts are loaded with coupons which price conscious shoppers feverishly clip out because a coupon is always a good price. Around the Twin Cities our "low price" grocery chain is Cub Foods. They've been around for about 40 years and from what I can tell began as a warehouse-type store where boxes of products were displayed with one side cut off for access when placed on store shelves. It's a logical way to keep prices low.

However, they aren't the low price leader any more. Sure, their image - using the American Typewriter font - would seem to instantly convey low prices but they just aren't consistently cheap any more. Their ads are still littered with coupons but their new low price model seems to be that of raising the regular price and then marking it down for the sale. The buy one, get one free coupon this week for a 20 oz. package of Gold 'n' Plump boneless, skinless chicken breasts comes to mind. They claim savings of a whopping $6.99! That not only seems artificially inflated but downright insanely high for 1.25 lbs. of chicken. I am fairly confident that, if it weren't for that BOGO special, I could pick up two packages for at least a dollar each less at the local Super Target store.

The puzzling fact is that people still shop at the area Cub Foods store in hordes. They did so after a very nice Rainbow Foods Fresh Store opened across the street. Rainbow's prices were equal to or lower than on most products than at the neighboring Cub Foods store. That just goes to show that either Cub Foods has totally nailed their marketing and branding image or that Minnesotans are very loyal to certain brands.

But how, in the face of decades of successful branding and imaging, does a competitor succeed in winning over new customers? Rainbow Foods is really the only legitimate grocery-only competitor to Cub Foods in the Twin Cities. The services they offer are comparable and so are the prices but Rainbow Foods has fallen flat on their face countless times since entering the market. Their image has been all over the map and they have failed to gain footing on a community organization level (Boy Scouts, youth hockey, etc.) like Cub Foods has done so well. Rainbow has bombed, I think, because their radio ads are flat out pointless and needlessly gimmicky. The Cub radio ads feature real people and mention the specials of the week. This is one case where Rainbow would be better for imitating rather than trying to be original and unique. Grocery customers do not give a damn about unique, they want low prices and Cub Foods mentions their seemingly low prices and those numbers, voiced by a female "interviewing" Cub customers, stick with people far more than a male doing the same because women buy the bulk of a family's groceries.

But you don't have to look cheap to grab customers. Target has a simple, even classy image. They are so successful that years ago Dayton changed the corporate name to Target Corp. Which one of those two names is still around? Target has succeeded by offering not only low prices but a customer experience. The prices are comparable to competitors, the brands are recognizable but they stick out because of their customer service and image. They are the classy discount department store and, I'm guessing, are more successful in the grocery field in the Twin Cities than Rainbow Foods is or ever will be. Still, it pays to shop around so do it and find out for yourself which store gets you the best deal and listen to those radio ads - which ones grab your attention?

If you want something more entertaining, may I suggest the photos of Minnesota at MinnPics. Something fresh and engaging to look at every day.

Is Trick or Treating Dead?

2009-10-26T15:32:00.000-05:00

"Is Trick or Treating Dead?" WCCO Good Question guy Jason DeRusha asked this question earlier today on his blog and his general reaction was that it's moving from a neighborhood event to a mall/event-centric "holiday". Hell, calling Halloween a holiday, in the traditional sense, is a bit of a stretch but it's marked as such on calendars so holiday it is.

Halloween, in my experience, isn't becoming any more of a mall-centric holiday for kids than it was when I was a wee-little goblin shaking down neighbors for candy. Halloween has always been about the kids because, let's face it, you look like a total dick if you're walking through the neighborhood smoking a cigarette in costume. That's either a sign that you're too damn old to beg for candy in your "costume" (turning your hat backwards and wearing your dad's uniform is NOT a costume) or you're a delinquent who needs to be locked up for your own good. And as much as I appreciate a nice cleavage-sporting costume, fifteen years old is not the appropriate age for that costume, now nineteen is a totally different story.

But back to the candy. The prices of candy are what piss me off - I spent about twenty bucks this year because I'm actually a nice guy. I willingly throw on my porch light each Halloween night and hand out candy to those who come to the door. It's usually the only time each year that I see 99% of these kids and they know damn well that they're leaving with at least one piece of candy.

Which brings me to another point. At least have the decency to say "Trick or Treat" when you hold out your pillowcase, shopping bag or plastic pumpkin. Don't be some ungrateful little prick who feels entitled to candy just because you had to walk all the way from your mom's minivan to my front door. And say "Thanks" after I drop the piece of candy into your little bag. Where the hell are your manners? That's why I like the under-five crowd. They are always the most polite (or shy) and they usually have mom or dad in tow with them. The ten-plus crowd is where they get to be "too cool" to try. They've taken on the mentality of their group leader and follow whatever attitude he or she displays - rarely is it a polite one. This is the douche crowd. They are too cool to even mutter a single word after I open the door. They are the ones who sometimes just walk around without a costume. Come on, even I wear a costume. This year, trick or treaters will either be greeted by hula girl Sornie or slutty nurse Sornie (both costumes I've previously worn - I like to recycle).

Which brings me to my final point. Halloween is one of the few "holidays" which is equally enjoyed by a broad group of ages. We all know that kids love it because they get "free" candy. But adults love it because they get to dress up like hula dancers or slutty nurses. And the adult women also get to dress up. That's what I like seeing...

If you like seeing photos from all corners of Minnesota, check out MinnPics. Updated multiple times daily, it's a virtual tour of the Northstar state.

A milestone I'd rather not achieve

2009-10-22T11:40:00.002-05:00

Within the next couple weeks I'll be forced to achieve a milestone that most people hit well over a decade earlier. Call me a late bloomer if you want but this milestone has me more pissed off than anything.

This past summer we bought a 2007 Toyota Rav4. It was decided just after the birth of The Toddler that my old lady's Toyota Solara, a two-door luxury wanna-be sports car, wouldn't work much longer as we spent time crawling in and out of the back seat to retrieve an increasingly heavy car seat.

My old lady's back sucks without being hunched over and retrieving a wiggling infant so we began our search for an official grown-up vehicle. We decided that my fifteen year-old Pontiac Grand Prix could be sold and we'd be back to two vehicles and all would work out.

The vehicle search began over a year ago. We test drove a Dodge something 4-door. That car sucked. Sorry Dodge but you need to do better but I'll never know about the Dodge Caliber because the douchebag at a certain now-closed Denny Hecker dealership wouldn't even let us testdrive it. We tried out a couple of Volkswagen Jettas. They were small, nimble and fast as hell but we were really looking for something around the same size as the Solara. After a doctor's appointment at the famed Mayo Clinic in Rochester, MN we test drove a Scion Xb, a Scion Xd, a Toyota Camry and a Toyota Corolla. At this point I was liking the pleasantly ugly Scion Xb.

Then this summer, after hitting the magical number in savings for a down payment, we test drove more vehicles. The next Friday, after scouring the internet for just the right vehicle, we hit the road to Mankato and 90 minutes later we were driving that 2007 Toyota Rav4.

A few months later it was time to change the oil. I located the appropriate oil filter - a crazy paper cartridge type - and bought a couple large jugs of oil. A couple nights later I got my gear together and crawled under the Rav4. I muddled and grumbled and cursed. This things was a damn nightmare. Something I had never seen in my fifteen years of changing oil in my vehicles. And the "can" housing the paper cartridge oil filter was so over-tightened that no amount of torque would budge it. I even called my brother-in-law mechanic who had no ideas or tools to aide me. I finally gave up, frustrated, and just drained the existing oil and replaced it with new. Then the cycle began again last weekend. The second oil change and I was prepared. I had what was promised to be a "damn good filter wrench" from NAPA and this time I would win the battle.

Then it happened. I was under the Rav4 again and the "damn good filter wrench" was constantly slipping. I needed something with more gripping power so off to another auto parts store where I found a kick-ass gripping jaws model that I KNEW would put me in the winner's circle.

Thirty minutes later the NAPA wrench was broken in half and my hand was nearly raw from torquing on the jaw-style wrench with my ratchet. Again I resorted to replacing only the oil and was left with a rather angry wife - angry about how much time I had spent to "accomplish nothing" and the amount of money I spent doing something "that I knew I could never do". Way to be supportive.

So in the next couple weeks I need to find an oil change place that won't cost a damn fortune. I've never had to pay someone to change my oil because it was ingrained in me growing up that you'd be foolish to ever pay for something so simple. Apparently my dad had never met this oil filter.

Today I sit as a defeated man in search of a lube and filter shop that will be able to remove the impossible oil filter can and make it possible for me to finally be able to change my own oil in the old lady's crossover. Yes, these are the battles I stupidly face every day.

One battle I enjoy is finding stunning photos to showcase at MinnPics. Check out what treasures of Minnesota await you today!

My hometown is going to hell

2009-10-20T12:31:00.000-05:00

I grew up in Austin, MN. Yeah, it sounds like that first statement from an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting but with the headlines on my hometown newspaper's website it is a bit shameful to say that I'm a former Austinite.

Chief stands by department's actions
Mace was used, three were arrested at an illegal immigration rally Saturday in Austin
The Austin police chief said Monday that his officers acted appropriately Saturday when using a chemical spray and making three arrests at a downtown protest.

Austin resident and member of the National Socialist Movement Samuel Johnson organized the illegal immigration protest at the Veterans Memorial in front of the courthouse, but things escalated when a large group of counter protesters — including many from an anti-racism coalition arrived.

Woman charged for allegedly slashing boyfriend
An Austin woman has been charged with felony assault for allegedly slashing her boyfriend with a knife, punching him and biting him Saturday.

Juana Viviana Lopez, 21, is scheduled to appear in court Tuesday. Along with the second-degree assault with a dangerous weapon charge, she faces a felony count of terroristic threats, as well as one lesser charge.

Austin resident pleads guilty to prostitution count
An Austin man charged with hiring a 17-year-old prostitute who later stole his shorts from a motel room pleaded guilty Monday in Mower County.

Carlos Lennin Batista-Quintana, 24, will be sentenced March 18 on one gross misdemeanor count of prostitution for hiring a 16- or 17-year-old.

**************

Okay, that last story about the prostitute is sort of funny. No, not because it's about paying for sex with a school-age teen but because the prostitute, who was doing her business at a motel known for prostitution, stole the guy's shorts. If you can't trust a hooker, who can you trust?

I promise to keep it classy at MinnPics. It's a photographic journey through Minnesota that you should really check out. And yes, I do portray Austin in a positive light there.

Food I've never eaten

2009-10-19T12:37:00.001-05:00

I'm something of an anomaly. I'll eat copious amounts of most anything you put in front of me but the things I've never eaten would make most people wonder if I'm acutally human (I am).

I've never eaten a McDonald's Big Mac sandwich. For one, I don't really trust much outside of the breakfast items - especially after a friend of mine from high school freaked out in the passenger seat of my car because he insisted that his Chicken McNugget contained a cyst and he had just bitten in to it. Even if his freak out was crazy, that sort of sealed the deal. Plus, I don't trust their slimy beef - I'm sure it has either soy or shredded newspapers in it as fillers. And the special sauce, I don't care what it is - good beef (which this clearly isn't) doesn't need to be covered in some mystery sauce to make it palatable.

A staple of kids all over America - which may explain the obesity problem - is macaroni and cheese. It's also something I've never once eaten. I don't trust cheese - powdered or melted - from a pouch. It goes against nature and that may be another reason why kids are little fatties. I don't care what my old lady says, even if her mac & cheese is the best thing this side of sex, I'm having nothing to do with it.

Mayonnaise. It just seems so unnatural to me. Really, who thought to themselves one day "Hey, I'm gonna combine oil and eggs and spread it on my sammich"? That's just fucked up when you break it down like that. Those are two items that, separately, have no business being near a sandwich but people, for whatever reason, think it's perfectly fine to slather them on their white bread and bologna sammich and gobble the crap right up. Again, I'm steering clear of it.

There are plenty more foods I've never eaten that are totally normal to most Americans but for the sake of time I'm ending it here for now. Am I strange for never eating these staples of Americana? Am I alone in omitting rather common foods from my diet?

Are you sick of this and would rather soak in the beauty of some amazing photos of Minnesota. Check out MinnPics for the latest photos!

A stadium conundrum

2009-10-19T11:09:00.001-05:00

I don't normally write about sports here because my audience, for whatever reason, is mainly females and the remainder are drive-bys searching for nipples, boobs and camel toe photos. But despite my rather obvious obsession with the female form I do at least casually follow sports and find myself almost infatuated with the role that stadiums play in professional and collegiate sports in America. Most every major metropolitan area has one huge stadium. It could be for college football, an NFL team or Major League Baseball but they are definitely a cornerstone of sorts in their respective city.

What amazes me is the cost of these stadiums. Locally, the Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome (The Dome) was built in the first years of the 1980s for what is now the paltry sum of $30 million. It has been the home of major league baseball's Minnesota Twins, the NFL's Minnesota Vikings and, up until last year, was also the home of the University of Minnesota's Golden Gopher football team. Yep, three teams occupied The Dome for the bulk of dates for eight months every year. It was also host to monster truck rallies, concerts, trade shows, the Super Bowl, the NBA's Minnesota Timberwolves for a year and the NCAA Final Four college basketball tournament. This ass-ugly but functional stadium has stood for nearly thirty years and could still very well be used for many more years with a substantial overhaul.

And that's about the only way I see The Metrodome as being functional beyond the next couple of years. It is hopelessly outdated. The concourses are dark and can become very crowded. The concession stands are set up poorly which leads to insanely long lines and the restrooms (the the troughs guys have to piss in) are too small and there are too few to serve the crowds during a Vikings game.

But the pricetag, coupled with a rather shitty location (eastern downtown Minneapolis) of the Metrodome, to remodel the domed stadium is lofty at best but a complete overhaul is still cheaper than building a completely new, single tenant stadium for $900 million which could sit on the same spot as The Metrodome or as far out as Blaine. The Vikes want amenities like luxury suites, parking revenue and money from concessions. As it stands right now they are merely tenants at The Dome. They lease the place and are now the sole tenant in the rat infested Dome.

But why do they need their own stadium? If The Dome won't suit your needs and you want amenities and the money from those the Vikings should have been forced a few years ago to team up with the Gophers when they built their new open air football stadium on the University of Minnesota campus. But the shortsighted fools begging for cash never though that two football teams could share a stadium - especially one where one team plays on Saturday and the other on Sunday. No, that kind of shared solution would have actually made sense and when it comes to politics and money that just doesn't register.

So now we're stuck with a college football stadium that was built to suit a college team. It isn't chock full of the amenities that an NFL team wants and needs and retrofitting a brand new stadium is actually stupid. So we're back to remodeling The Metrodome and unless hell freezes over shortly that will never happen and I don't see tax payers willing to pony up any more in the way of additional sales tax to fund another playground for millionaires. So the two unlikely scenarios remain - the Vikings owner Zygi Wilf performs a drastic overhaul of The Metrodome and builds the surrounding area into a year around venue as MinnPost suggests or the Vikings pay for some crazy-spendy overhauls to the new Gophers stadium and still compromise alot in the process.

Or the Vikings move to that eventual stadium in Los Angeles. It is designed with purple seats and it wouldn't be the first time a Minnesota team relocated to Los Angeles. Oh well, I've never been to a Vikings game anyway but I do hear that the nearly vacant Brookdale Center could be had on the cheap. Think it over Zygi.

Or Zygi Wilf could check out MinnPics. Hey, if Zygi is loving the stunning photos of Minnesota you should check them out too!

Meghan McCain shows boobs, internet freaks out

2009-10-15T13:38:00.002-05:00

Sometimes accidents happen. We aren't always aware of how we look in a self-portrait. Women are especially victims of this. Whether it be a nipple-slip or cleavage up to their necks as is the case with Meghan McCain, there is nobody to blam but yourself. Or is there.

Let's throw aside political affiliations for a moment. Sure, Meghan McCain is the daughter of one John McCain. She is also an active Republican. Those two things put her at least somewhat in the public eye and as we know in the celebrity-obsessed world where papparazzi stalk the likes of Jon and Kate Gosselin, even the boobs of a Republican are fair game for criticism.

But I don't think so. Meghan McCain is more than entitled to have a personal life. She has the right, by way of our freedom of speech, to post whatever the hell she wants on her Twitter account. McCain, however, has to walk that fine line. Republicans, by name alone, are supposed to be the party of virtues, dignity and sort of the poster children for upstanding citizens. So posting a photo where your huge, delectable, juicy boobs are trying to escape from your tank top does start to erode your entire party's stance against displaying any amount of sexuality.

The difference, again, is that the comments - some bordering on hate speech - are uncalled for. Meghan McCain apologized for her gaffe. She was just simply trying to show how tame her weeknights are as she curled up with an Andy Warhol book and snuggled with her lady lumps. Nobody deserves the kind of verbal attacks spineless and anonymous people lobbed at her via Twitter. Hey, at least she owned up to her curvaceous mistake and has deleted the photo in question from her TwitPic account but something like this never actually vanishes. So, what would you have done? Would you take pride in an accidental boob photo like her's?

If that photo made you uneasy, check out MinnPics. Come along as we explore the hidden photogenic treasures of Minnesota.

The real deal with local music

2009-10-14T10:38:00.001-05:00

This past summer marked a breakthrough of sorts for a musician from the southern Minnesota city of Owatonna. He had achieved plenty of notoriety via MySpace for his electronica-type music but finally found mainstream success when the single "Fireflies" found its way on to the radio which, like it or not, is still the sort of passive way of finding new music.

The only problem with radio is that they are extremely slow to pick up on new music. Sure, some radio stations add a couple of tracks each week but those are only added because some label executive paid the radio stations a few wheelbarrows of money and gave the station's executives tropical trips complete with the necessary hookers and blow. That doesn't bode well for new music, it bodes well for record labels with a lot of cash to throw around.

I have basically zero faith in local commercial radio. While there is some new music played, it boils down to a half-dozen or so overplayed paid-for pop songs. That creates a problem for a Minnesota artist like Adam Young who is Owl City. Yeah, "Fireflies" is getting radio airplay in the Twin Cities on KDWB but that didn't happen until mid-September. I first heard "Fireflies" in early August via the webstream of WFNX in Boston, Massachussets.

Yep, it took me listening to the stream of a radio station half the country away to discover a musician who is based an hour away from my house. Local commercial radio can burn in hell if I ever once hear any station claim to play local music or even serve the interests of the public because if you have to wait over a month between first hearing a song and hearing it on a radio station you can get in your car then the entire process is broken. And yes, I'm well aware that an example like this is exactly why iTunes exists but if the old ways of media want to compete in an age of increasing fragmentation then they need to break the mold and shake off the old ways of doing business. Yes, Ryan Seacrest is a big name but what does he know about Minnesota?

This is precisely why MinnPics exists. I am at least from Minnesota and sort through literally hundreds of photos each day to find those which you need to look at. Check 'em out today!

Describing myself in five (hundred) words

2009-10-13T09:45:00.000-05:00

We've all been there - that job interview where the interviewer says "Describe yourself in five words for me." You then proceed to rattle off the standard answers - diligent, hard-working, motivated, blah, blah, blah...

The problem with that standard job interview question is that most everyone uses the same five answers. Nobody ever answers with "sporadic" or "scatterbrained". That's why people in the hiring position at companies rarely get the best employee for the position. I have to admit that I'd rather be allowed to basically hang myself during in an interview without being limited to a handful of words. Instead of five words, why not five-hundred? What would you say about yourself in five-hundred words? Here's what I'd say in a bit more than five words.

I'm not using the standard answers you're used to hearing but I am a hard worker. I don't need anybody telling me what needs to be done because, unlike some people, I can see what needs my attention and I take care of those tasks while I prioritize the other necessary tasks. My desk will always look like a typhoon just made landfall but it's how I work. I'm the guy that steps up his game in a crunch. When there's a pile of work sitting there and there doesn't seem to be nearly enough time to get it all done, I'm the one the gets it done. Sure, I might not be the most pleasant person to be around during those few hours but in the end the work gets done and it looks great and the clients are happy. I always have their best interests in mind even if they don't seem to care about their image. I, and I know this sounds like a cliche, can easily be accused of caring too much. Most times, that first concept is the best and great ideas don't always need endless tweaks and adjustments and especially additions. I can convey a message without having to write a story. The best messages often times leave the potential customer asking a few questions and the client is just the person to answer tham and that leads to sales. It's the ultimate goal in advertising - to move your product - whatever it is and my work leads to positive results while putting your business' best image possible in front of potential customers.

As far as my temperament, I treat people exactly how they treat me. If you have a gruff attitude or lack common sense or decency, you'll get that right back. I don't roll over and I take a stand for what is best. Treat me well and you'll get that in return. Believe in what I'm doing but know that even the best ideas sometimes fall flat on their face. Work with me and the ideas, concepts and results will impress you.

Now that I've done my fake job interview, feel free to take it and run with it on your own time. Share the results and we'll at least all come out of this having a vague idea of what each other does.

And do me a HUGE favor and check out MinnPics. It's chock full of killer photos from every corner of Minnesota and currently obsessed with fall.

Bad engagement photos keep on coming

2009-10-13T06:51:00.000-05:00

Sometimes it's not the overall style of the photo (or lack of style) or downright hillbilly-esque dressing habits that make for a bad engagement photo. This one, from the south metro of Minneapolis, features one of the most common way to ruin a photo - a crazy expression.

The bride-to-be in this particular bad engagement photo seems like she had just been pinched on the ass by her fiance. Or maybe she just noticed a closet full of dead bodies directly in front of her in the photographer's studio.

Or maybe the bride-to-be is trying to brainwash anyone who looks at her for more than ten seconds. Try staring at this photo for even one minute. She has something sinister planned.

MinnPics keeps finding classy and amazing photos. Click on over today to find out what's next.

Were your neighbors just having sex?

2009-10-12T13:32:00.004-05:00

Let's face it, without sex we wouldn't be walking the Earth, going about our live or reading such fantastic blogs as this. So in this ultra-connected, ultra-shared web-centric world we live in it was only a matter of time until someone started a website that let users share their erotic encounters on a worldwide map. That's probably why I Just Made Love (h/t) was born.

It's handy to me so I can tell if the next door neighbors were screaming due to an argument or flat-out, wall-rattling, glass shattering, crazy sex. It's the newest way to be an anonymous voyeur and while it's not for everyone, I think it's worth a few moments of your time to clock and scroll around and read the quick notes about user's sexual encounters.

And on another, semi-related note, today is Columbus Day so banks are closed. Seriously, quit Googling for an answer. Banks are closed - it's a government holiday but some would argue that with the way our government works that every day must be a government holiday.

Now go do something woth your life that you'll be proud of - check out MinnPics. It's freshly updated a complete with photographic evidence of our ultra-early Twin Cities snowfall.

Another bad engagement photo

2009-10-11T19:07:00.001-05:00

In the sure-to-be long-lived tradition started last week right here, I bring you another bad engagement photo.

I'm all for letting your personality shine through in portrait photography (the last wedding I photographed featured the bride and groom in their sunglasses) but camouflage hats for your engagement photo - that's just tacky. And put on something besides a t-shirt.

MinnPics has higher standards when selecting photos to feature. Check it out now and see what corner of Minnesota shines today.

Bad Engagement Photos

2009-10-08T13:47:00.005-05:00

In the vein of "Bad Family Photos", I'm starting a collection of "Bad Engagement Photos". We've all seen them, hell, some of us have even been featured in them (not me - our engagement photos were damn classy). I could go on and on with stereotypes about what would make an engagement photo a truly bad engagement photo but you can let your imagination run wild. Think mullets, slogan t-shirts, lame backdrops, soft focus and 80s bangs (this is, after all, 2009).

This first one is from my old hometown's newspaper, the Austin Daily Herald. I have a feeling that it will be a complete goldmine for material but if you see a bad engagement photo posted on a newspaper website (hopefully in Minnesota) send the link my way.

Notice a slogan t-shirt and some sort of bad effect as a border on the photo. I am also venturing out a limb here in saying that her carpet DOES NOT match the drapes.

MinnPics explores autumn today from a few perspectives. Check them out now.

The problem with medical care

2009-10-07T10:38:00.001-05:00

The biggest problem is the overall lack of care in the medical world. I say this with one caveat: there are plenty of medical professionals who truly care about their work (a certain friend from back home comes to mind) and go way beyond the extra mile to do their jobs. They come in early, stay late, work tons of extra hours but I think they do so because they feel the need to compensate for those around them who don't pull their own weight. Those problems exist in every profession but are more obvious in a business which people's very lives depend on.

Those who do the bulk of the work are stretched thin - and it shows. They sometimes work at multiple locations and have to travel frequently. It's all about providing shareholders with the best return and giving CEOs ever-increasing bonuses. It's the American way. The work of the best supports the lack of work from the rest. Sure, sometimes the hard work is recognized but rarely is the lack of work called out.

This all stems from a visit to the doctor's office I had Saturday morning. First off, it's nearly impossible to find a doctor on a Saturday morning but when you're sick you can't really schedule it. The only available place within a reasonable driving distance that could accomodate my crappy schedule for the rest of the day along with my list of duties was a minute clinic-type office inside a retail store.

I arrived promptly at the exact minute which the office opened. I filled out the paperwork and in two minutes I had been checked with the standard stuff (blood pressure, temperature, etc.) by the office's nurse. Then I waited. I played a few hands of poker on my phone. I blew my nose a half-dozen times. I called my old lady. I even dozed off. Forty minutes in to my wait, after the nurse had called the doctor, I was informed that the doctor was running late. She cordially apologized and explained that he'd be in the office in about ten minutes.

About ten minutes passed and the doctor arrived. He quickly asked a few questions. He moved his stethoscope around while having me cough and in less than two minutes had written things off as simply a cold and out the door I went with a prescription for cough syrup and nasal spray.

Let me repeat that. I waited fifty minutes for two minutes of this doctor's time. I was able to ask just one question before he nearly pushed me out the door. But what choice do I have on a Saturday morning? I could have visited an emergency room like so many recommend but what would the outcome have been? My shoddy insurance isn't going to pay a dime for what I did because of my insanely high (normal) deductible. So here I am, ten days after I first noticed symptoms and I still can't sleep through the night, I sometimes cough just short of the point of vomiting and I've blown my nose so many times that it's dry and nearly bloody. I don't feel like I'm getting any better but it's just a cold according to Dr. Two Minutes. Yeah, our medical system works just fine.

MinnPics has returned. After a long weekend it's back with some fresh Minnesota photos that you need to check out.

Wind turbines too controversial?

2009-09-30T14:38:00.001-05:00

While some southern Minnesota counties have literally hundreds of wind turbines dotting the corn and soybean-filled landscape, another south-central county has basically banned them. Nicollet County, just outside of Mankato, has just made it nearly impossible (h/t) to build the clean energy-generating windmills.

By requiring a one-half mile setback from any dwelling/residence, Nicollet County has effectively stifled any hopes of wind energy spurring a monetary infusion into the county and it's also crushed the hopes of Gustavus Adolphus whose college campus in the city of St. Peter wanted to erect a wind turbine both as a symbolic measure of their commitment to the environment and as a working model that a large business can make strides to be self-sustained.
Oh, sure, cities use the argument that wind turbines can be an eyesore and are unpleasant to see in a city's skyline. Well, in case most cities haven't noticed - especially in the suburbs - their skylines are defined by water towers and cell phone antennas. Those aren't exactly landmarks when every damn city looks like its neighbor. Maybe these head-up-their-ass elected officials need to look to the future instead of their oh-so-pristine skylines and think about the next generation because if every kilowatt continues to come from coal, the skies could be so dirty that you wouldn't be able to see your water towers and cell phone antennas.

MinnPics is also on board with the majestic coolness of wind turbines dotting Minnesota's farmscapes because they look awesome in photos.

Phlegm and energy drinks

2009-09-28T10:15:00.000-05:00

It is unbelievable what interrupted sleep does to a guy. Granted, I wasn't awake for 90 minutes like my old lady was but even the 30 minutes in which I was awake and the 30 minutes early I had to wake up takes it toll.

It all started Saturday night. The baby was coughing alot. She even managed to turn it in to a game. With each cough, regardless of its intensity, she'd physically remove her pacifier and throw it. This was because it happened without her help one time that she coughed but I congratulated her on making a cough at least entertaining for herself. She eventually hacked up a puddle of phlegm. Thankfully we have hardwood floors in her bedroom.

But last night her coughing was a bit more consistent. Her tiny coughs shook her body. Her face turned red and she cried... alot. The only difference was that, before putting her to bed, she hadn't hacked up any phlegm. We took this as a good sign.

And it was a good sign until I was awakened at 3:55 AM by my old lady asking if I planned on doing anything. That is when she informed me that she had already been up for an hour and that the baby was sitting up in the corner of her crib crying and hacking. I slowly stumbled out of bed and picked up the little ball of rage and made my way down stairs to make her a bottle to at least soothe her somewhat.

Upon returning upstairs and her successfully hacking up a tiny pool of phlegm, I noticed something in her hair just above her ear. It was phlegm. Yes, the baby had managed, during her hacking, to launch some lung snot into her brown hair.

So, after all that, and her sleeping in our bed last night, here I am. Sleep deprived, unfocused and with a slight headache. I dread returning home after work because I know that my old lady will be crabby. And I know that plenty of other parents have much worse ordeals with their children but this is out of the ordinary. The baby is almost perfect. She always sleeps all night and is rarely a hand full. She's even rather drink from a galss like an adult.

But to get through the day, I have a 16 oz. can of Plasma Fusion Energy drink waiting in the refrigerator for me. It's from a company based just up the road (or down the road, or across town) in Eden Prairie, Minnesota. And it has real cane sugar in it. I'm thinking that it's worthy of its own review this week.

If I make it through the day, expect updated photographic goodness at MinnPics.

A letter to myself in 1997

2009-09-25T13:32:00.000-05:00

What would you write, in letter form, to yourself in the year you graduated high school? Would you tell yourself to totally change your course? Would you advise taking a year off from life and travel and explore the world? Would you tell yourself to chase more tail or to keep it in your pants? What the hell would I tell myself to do?

Dear 18 year-old me,

I know you're starting college this fall and that's a good thing. I also know that you're not going to get much in the way of a meaningful degree. Stay in college longer. There's no shame in sticking around for five or six years - it's a good time and the education and degree you get out of it will actually offset the tremendous amount of debt you'll incur. Oh, and you might want to expand your educational horizons a bit as well. I know you're set on being a graphic designer and websites which you see as cool but boring in their design will change drastically in the next twelve years.

It's fine that you want to get a degree in graphic design but have a fallback plan - learn as much as you can about websites - design, language, etc. because by 2007 you'll realize that shit's gonna hit the fan and your dream of making it really, really big in print graphic design will be just a dream.

Secondly, don't be apprehensive about leaving the area you already know. Move, travel, lighten the fuck up. That one friend who opened your mind to all of that cool music was a great first step. Be sure to keep in touch with her. That's one of those friendships you'll still have when you're fumbling with your dentures.

And that friend with cool tastes in music, she's going to be totally right about that girl, who in a year, will want to date you. Sure she's totally fun and wild but she's also crazy and not in a good way. Oh, she's also pregnant. You won't see that one coming.

Moving on now. Immerse yourself in something and dream big. No, bigger.

Finally, don't be a dumbass. I know you'll do some pretty stupid shit in your early twenties. Enjoy it but you're gonna come close to actually offing yourself because of your stupidity. Oh, sure, you'll laugh about it later but that's only because your friends were there to save your stupid ass from almost certain death or at least very, very painful injuries.

In the end, thing turn out alright. At 30 years old you own a house, you're married, you own a couple of Toyotas and a swingset you built. Oh, and you have a kid. She's pretty damn cute, too. Sure, you still want more but the things you want are only to further challenge yourself so that's a good thing. But that idea you have at thirty of eventually owning an apple orchard, I'll just tell 18 year-old me (you) to remember that the apple business is rather crowded and way too damn competitive to be worth the trouble.

Speaking of apples, MinnPics will probably have some orchard photos as fall kicks in to gear.

Cougars in the suburbs?

2009-09-23T08:58:00.000-05:00

By now we all know that the suburban cougar is alive and well. The suburban cougar is pursued by young males everywhere. If I weren't married, I'd probably be pursuing a cougar for myself because she'd probably have a few tricks up her sleeve. But today I'm not talking about that suburban cougar that hangs out at bars and wears seductive clothing. Today I'm talking about real cougars in the giant feline form.

A local thoroughbred who was supposed to be a spokeshorse of sorts for other retired ponies was attacked by what many think to be a cougar on a farm in Prior Lake near a Shakopee elementary school. I've always had my doubts about the tales I've heard since moving here about cougars and coyotes roaming the valleys along the Minnesota River. My wife is particularly adamant about the existence of coyotes. She recounts memories of hearing them on the farm she grew up on just above the Minnesota River. Her brothers had seen coyotes in the woods near the farm and her dad had shot at them to scare them away on numerous occasions.

Again, I had my doubts. I never believe something until I've seen it with my own eyes. Then one night while driving in the Belle Plaine area along Highway 169 I actually saw a small dog-like animal standing on the shoulder of the road. I knew it wasn't a fox - I have seen plenty of those while growing up in far southern Minnesota. My wife immediately told me that it was a coyote.

And that is exactly what the Minnesota DNR thinks attacked My Friend Deke, the horse that was stabling in Prior Lake. If I lived in that immediate area or had kids who attended that particular elementary school, I'd be alreat but not concerned. After all, we are the ones who encroached on the area which these wild animals call home. Six years ago when I moved here, that particular area was still corn fields and woods. Now it is leveled and full of half-million dollar homes and strip malls. When humans and animals try to co-exist, it's usually the animals who end up losing the battle in the end but a cougar or a coyote attacking a farm animal should serve as a wake-up call that we are all pissing nature off.

If you like nature and want to embrace it, check out MinnPics which often times showcases fabulous photos of Minnesota's natural beauty.

Contemplating pubic baldness

2009-09-21T12:54:00.004-05:00

From a curious mind come bizarre questions. Most of my questions relate to pubic hair and baldness. It was only a matter of time until the two topics collided.

I'm no scientist but if general baldness can happen (of the cranium) who's to say that pubic baldness couldn't happen? Sure, some view pubic hair as nothing more than another hassle to maintain what with the constant trimming, washing, combing, perming and braiding so these people would likely view pubic balding as more of a blessing than a curse.

However, I see pubic balding among the general population as a potential profit center. Think of the millions of dollars made by the makers of Rogaine. The men buying these cans of foam are desperate to hold on to and re-grow their hair. It makes sense that vanity, as fair as hair goes, would continue to one's nether regions and extend below the belt. Pubic hair, in spite of the general view that presentation of it and the pubic region is best left behind closed doors, is nothing to be ashamed of.

Maybe we're to the point in our evolution that pubic baldness isn't actually baldness, it could just be the natural course of things to come. Maybe three generations from now all those places doing full Brazilian waxing will be out of business because nobody has any nether-regional hair left to be excruciatingly ripped out. It would really be a blessing for all of those strippers giving table dances at King of Diamonds in Inver Grove Heights but what aabout all of those unemployed waxing technicians? What about my grandiose plans for Pubic Rogaine?

What about visiting MinnPics to make yourself clean after reading an entire post about pubic hair?