Personal Fulfillment

The Intriguing Icebreaker!

2020-05-11T14:34:00.000+07:00

As I walked into meeting room in 2017, a genuine smile greeted me. While I smiled & tried to refresh my memory, quiet a few questions were racing in my mind:

Do I know him? Why is he smiling as if he knows me well?
Is he an employee or a contractor?
Why is he trying to be nice to me?

When I started my professional career 2 decades ago, one of the definitions of professionalism was seriousness. In general, seriousness is associated with strength, seriousness is associated with intelligence, seriousness is associated with results.

We were in the storming phase of a large initiative & we were building a large team with new members. As I had just traveled back and as it was a large meeting with a regular cadence, we didn't get introduced during the meeting. Soon I met Sudheer Ravella & I understood that he is a Business Analyst in our department. We started working together as he was part of our cross functional team.

I always believed and practiced that professionalism is not anti-human. Few characteristics that should exemplify our professionalism in thoughts, words & actions are:

Integrity - no compromise on ethics
Equilibrium - in good & bad times
Competence - be on top of our game
Confidence - in the known & unknown
Commitment - for results

A genuine smile starts from the heart & connects to the hearts of humanity

Seriousness term in professionalism is used to keep the focus but not to ban smiles.

If professionalism is not built with humanity, we know that the career will not last long

As I observed Sudheer, apart from the sincere efforts he puts at work, I could see that he interacts with anyone he comes across even if they are not remotely related to what we do at work. He instantly connects to someone working in the same floor if he meets them in pantry, the chef or the cashier in the cafeteria, etc. We in team think that he is secretly planning to be the next mayor. He knows all people he interacts by their name (not just a hi/bye), not just to kill time but to understand & keeps the tone of interaction upbeat. People who work with him are also ready to go the extra mile (beyond contractual obligations); support him to accomplish our Product goals. He starts all this with a genuine smile.

Smiling is not giving up our our guards:

Our smile is an intent expressed that I trust

An intent that I choose to trust first, until it's broken.

Smile says that we still have hope in humanity

Our smile shows that we are interested in genuine connections.

Our smile shows the inner state of our being despite the challenges we might be facing

Our smile says that we can add positive value.

Our instincts tell us not to trust someone if the smile is not genuine; in the same way our instincts tell us to trust someone if their smile is genuine.

If you haven't realized yet, trust is the biggest asset; it can start with a genuine smile!

Due to reorg, Sudheer has been reporting to me for more than a year now. As I have been coaching him, it has been a delight watching him learn our business/application-implementation everyday & becoming an indispensable team player.

I am glad that Sudheer is now successfully transitioning to Product Management job family in our Lowe's Canada Digital space.

Next time when you meet someone, genuinely greet them with a smile. You don't know how you will ending up adding value in each other's lives!

The panic strike!

2020-05-11T14:32:00.001+07:00

Cleaning/washing delivered groceries has become our routine now. The fun part of shopping is gone & the thought of cleaning makes it a dreaded experience.

Now we all know what an emergency feels like. Even in these trying times, when we see things in the right context, we can continue to stay calm and focus on our goals.

We all have different leadership styles.

Inspire or bully
Create the way or wait
Work with team to unblock or appear only for postmortems

One of the leadership styles I have observed is the panic strike mode. To make team understand the sense of urgency, some leaders use this method of "crying wolf". We know it only works until associates realize. Then the leader has to resort to new levels of escalation & eventually team get's completely disengaged instead of scaling up as intended by the leader.

Some user stories will be high risk but accepted into sprint to see how much we can make progress.
Some user stories will be more complicated than how it initially seemed.
After our solution goes live, we will face challenges of the ever evolving world.

To help team to perform with the best of their abilities & to help them understand the sense of urgency:

Help team understand how their contributions helps team/department goals & eventually that of the organization.

Give team the big picture

Ensure team works from user perspective (Customers - internal or external).

Trust that team is doing their best

Look for options to unblock their challenges while encouraging out of the box thinking.

Not every block is technical

If it is a challenge with employee(s)' morale address it appropriately.

Improving productivity is a long term activity

Only few things can be fine tuned immediately.

Foresee & plan for skill refresh

The impulsive reactions to every challenge drains the team. Sustaining the context & showing support to help instead of finding a scape goat improves the team moral. Let's respect the emergency button.

What's your start of day strategy?

Mine is to plan for end of day shopping groceries if delivery slots are not available.

The Dizzy Climb

2020-05-11T14:30:00.001+07:00

As we (me & my family) were exiting from the IHOP restaurant in Brevard, Florida we saw a sign for Brevard Zoo. We were very clear that we didn't want to visit Disney or Universal parks to avoid year end holiday frenzy. When wait times were multiple times longer than ride time, it didn't make it worth the park visit. As we didn't have any other plan we decided to explore Brevard Zoo. Finding the parking lot full at 10 AM was a good sign that we found a happening place though it is relatively unknown. In addition to the zoo, we were excited to hear about the obstacle course. I knew that there is more than one day of exciting fun to engage kids. We chose the toughest obstacle course (Black Diamond) to align to our adventurous spirit but wasn't sure if we can finish as we didn't know what exactly is in store.

As we went through the obstacle course, we realized how critical the safety rope hooked to our harness is. We were trained to shout "clear" as we reach each level and remember to unhook & throw the support rope to next in line.

It was a beautiful learning experience which reminded me of leadership in realtime:

As we climb up, it is inspiring to see our associates climb along or ahead of us.

Appreciate other's growth to feel inspired

or

choose to feel jealous to stun our growth!

Throwing the safety rope down is like mentoring to uncover team's blind spots, providing visibility for efforts from the team instead of taking all the credit, not showing favoritism and making them feel that we have their back.

It shouldn't feel lonely on top!

If we are focused only on ourselves then obviously we will feel lonely wherever we go, we can't trust anyone & we can only go so far as we can go alone. The magic of synergy is never realized.

Our team's success is our success.

We should also be ready to discover our own safety rope instead of waiting (more on this later).

Shoot your web & create your rope!

We should find our niche to keep our momentum.

Momentum is not just in moving up but having the discipline to consistently sharpen our skills to add value everyday.

Some obstacles were really challenging & pushed our limits but we were a happy bunch as we emerged as Black Diamonds from the toughest obstacle course in Brevard!

The "Energy Intelligence"

2020-05-11T14:29:00.001+07:00

As I finished work for the day, I came to the living room. It was the early days of lockdown & the school break was extended. There was a strange silence in the house.

There was lot of hustle bustle during spring break with both the kids at home. When it was announced that kid's won't be back to school for an unforeseeable period, it was a new stress for kids to handle. Our high school son couldn't meet his friends in school & obviously his sleepover requests won't be honored. As he is an older kid, he had his ways to manage the stress (online gaming, home gym, time with Leo our pet, etc).

For our daughter in middle school, it was little more difficult to get adjusted. She was curled up on the living room couch with her fleece on. As I sat next to her she started making long howling noises. She was not crying but when I hugged her, I could feel a sharp pain in my heart. I told her once softly to stop howling as the sound was annoying. The burden I felt hugging her made me feel what she must be going through. I didn't stop her after that, I didn't tell her anything. I just held her as I tried to process the stress and burden I was feeling. I had never felt so out of place & helpless before when I didn't have a way to comfort her.

As the howling continued, I understood that :

Lot of times when we speak in these times, it spoils the effort though the intent is right. Words become noise, bounces off & sometimes bounces back colored with pain.
We know that we easily offend people and trigger reactions by speaking our mind. In our mind layer, there 'might' be logic but there is no connection. So, people just hear and don't process what we say. Hearing & not listening is a way of shielding our emotional balance.

When we speak based on how we feel, we instantly connect to people as we add less colors to our words. Empathetic words born out of feelings open the channels of listening as they are lot more refined than impersonal words from our mind. Thus, a human face to leadership is born. This is what we call emotional intelligence.

Our words have their limitations. Most of what we feel we can categorize as "Unknown, No words, Inexplicable" as it is beyond the human mind. As our friends in psychology continue with their research to tag the feelings with a name, it certainly is like over engineering our life if we try to know what is the scientific term for every feeling we experience.

This is where, we can make people feel what our intent is, without uttering a word. The level of "Energy Intelligence". If we can harness this, we can make people around us feel that energy, yes with just our presence without us uttering a word.

What we need in these times is energy; an energy that can give hope that everything will be alright, that we can go through this & that we can come out of this as better people.

As the howling continued for minutes (certainly looked long as I lost count of time), I had to remind myself that I am a reservoir of unlimited energy (so are all of us). Just like how the sun gives rays of hope to all living beings in this planet 'without uttering a word', I felt I too can provide the required comfort. As I felt the pain & burden in me reduce, I could hearing my daughter calm down. The moments of silence we felt after that was priceless.

In a few seconds, she threw the fleece & became her usual bubbly self. Since then I am glad to see that she has adjusted very well to the current routine of the unknown & learnt how to thrive well in the abstract.

Step #1 to conquering 'Space & Time'

2020-05-11T14:27:00.001+07:00

Before my travel back to US from India, we (my Lowe's India team & me) wanted to plan a team outing. We chose a weekend with minimum work commitments, and decided to start "early" to beat Bangalore traffic. The "early" time I was told was 3 to 3:30 AM to assemble near our 1st pick up point (Manyata) so that we can leave by 3:30 AM. I was one of the luckiest ones as I had to take 27 km journey to reach the first pickup point. As usual I planned in reverse to pack everything the previous evening, wake up at 2 AM, leave from my condo (near Doddaballapura) by 2:30 AM, reach office by 3:05 AM & take the ~1 km walk to the pickup point. Due to a sprain in my leg, I was completely incapacitated 2 days back & I wasn't sure if I can make it to the trip we have been planning few a months. With Ultracet (most powerful analgesic yet - for me), I was able to drive 27 kms and take the ~1 km walk to reach the finish line by 3:30 AM, on time! I was expecting to see 10 of our associates (all but me) so that we can start; I was greeted by 2. Then the scrambling started to find where the rest were. While some where untraceable (on the way and couldn't pick phone or update location), some were still at home waiting for their Cab. One of the key planners of the trip surprised me at 3:45 AM by saying, "I booked the Cab for 3:30 AM & still waiting". Despite the 10 minute journey for him, I couldn't understand how he can plan for all of us to leave by 3:30 AM without accounting for unforeseen delays & travel time.

Space & Time are the 2 most inspiring & impactful constraints in our physical world.
Though many lives (including that of Einstein, Hawking Et. al) were dedicated to study & demystify them, in simple terms we know that "Despite being the right person, we also have to be in the right place at the right time to be successful".
The whole world is tightly connected by space & time despite the spatial & time zone differences. Our every action (proactive or reactive) has a domino effect on this world.
Where we stand now in our life is a summary of our choices (we made & didn't make).
The only way to beat these constraints of 'Space & Time', is to take control of them instead of being controlled by them.
Step #1 to conquering 'Space & Time' is to be on time.

As we left the first pickup point by 4:30 AM, the key planner sighed in relief, "on-time!". Yes, you read it right. Looks like the planned ETD was 4:30 AM & conveyed time was 3:30 AM. How I wish this notion of "Indian Standard Time" can be banished forever!

I was glad this happened as I took this opportunity to talk to team about this most important aspect in life. Nevertheless, this is one of the best trips yet - Coorg, October 2019!

The Mini-Me Syndrome

2014-04-19T14:26:00.001+07:00

When you are brainstorming, doesn't it become distracting when someone tries to push themselves instead of just sharing their ideas?

Isn't it annoying when someone tries to stick to their idea and justify that their idea is the one which gets implemented irrespective of whether it is flawed?

Isn't it enervating when someone says that it is only because of them & only them that everything is going great in the whole organization or the universe?

ALERT! You are near someone who has the Mini-Me Syndrome. This Mini-Me syndrome is very contagious. It drains your energy every time you are near the infected and gives you an impression of pseudo energy when you get infected.

We all thrive to be at our best. We all have our genius moments and we come up with great ideas to improve. We show signs of evolution when we express our ideas in a constructive manner but our true nature shows up when our idea gets rejected. If you take a moment to reflect you will realize that we have been in both the sides of the fence (Perceived Genius - the "Mini-Me" & Perceived Dumbo - the "Mini-Me" prey) in different situations.

How to handle a situation when you are near someone infected by the "Mini-Me Syndrome"?

If it is a hallway discussion:

Discourage behavior by politely excusing yourself from the scene. You can focus on better things in life instead of hearing their Mini-Me stories.
There is no use in arguing when they think the whole world revolves around them.
The pause will help the "Mini-Me" infected friend to realize and get back to normal.

If it is an organized meeting:

Get to the root cause so that everybody's focus can be on the problem instead of their "Mini-Me" area.
Always be alert to bring the discussion back on track with the focus on "task at hand".
"Mini-Me" will keep popping up, politely make it clear to all in the discussion that the focus should be on the problem statement instead of creating new problems due to the "Mini-Me" syndrome.

How to share your views without being infected by the "Mini-Me Syndrome"?

Don't think you are the only smart person in the room! (read this again & again)
Understand the situation from all possible perspectives and share your "genius" solution along with the details on why you think it will help.
When someone says "No", instead of pressing the panic button, ask respectfully and understand why they feel it will not work.
If you feel lost that your idea is not accepted then understand that you are getting infected or already infected by the "Mini-Me" syndrome.
ANTIDOTE: Change your focus "from you to the problem" and "from you to others" in the room. You will be able to come up with better suggestions.
Encourage all in the room to come up with solutions. The timid ones might have the greatest of all the ideas.
List all ideas from all in the room along with pros & cons.
Take the best of all the ideas and finalize the approach as a group.
If you don't have an agreement, meet again later to give enough time for all to digest the "task at hand" and possible solutions.
Ensure everybody feels appreciated for their contribution & everyone should feel like a winner at the end of the discussion!

Tell me how you deal with the "Mini-Me"s at work or elsewhere.

Hopefully your company culture strongly DISCOURAGES "Mini-Me" behavior and encourages collaboration. If not, try changing the company culture or simply join Lowe's (http://careers.lowes.com)!

"Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people."
- Eleanor Roosevelt

Interesting article on similar lines - http://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20140418192430-15342750-working-with-a-narcissist-tips-to-identify-the-signs?trk=tod-home-art-list-large_0

The World is Large Enough!

2013-04-05T20:31:00.002+07:00

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This is the content of my speech in Toastmaster's Area level International speech contest. I won 2nd in my club level, I could only manage 3rd place in the Area level.

Though I will not be moving to the District Level competition, I thoroughly enjoyed giving the speech, hope you will enjoy this blog and I will be glad if this inspires you!

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No, this is not about the next James Bond movie.

Friends, this is about the inspirations in my life who keep telling me that I shouldn’t get discouraged as this world is large enough for all of us! Though there are many inspirations, in the best interest of time I would like to talk about 2 of my biggest inspirations.

First is Dr. Wayne Dyer

In the world of motivation, Dr. Wayne Dyer is a Rock Star. He helped me realize the power of nature. We can call nature as God, Super Intelligence or Life. If I take a moment to think, from a single cell, I have grown this big. This hand has so much of complexity inside it and yet so simple that I need not know everything inside it to use it. Whether we realize it or not, we are completely surrounded by this super Intelligence and its miracles. Irrespective of the religion we believe in, the culture we are from, the language we speak, this super intelligence unconditionally loves us and is constantly at work to give us the best.

In Jan 2009, when I was working as a consultant for Lowe’s in Wilkesboro, the CEO of my Indian Consulting Company Satyam sent a letter to Security Exchange Board of India and Stock Exchanges that the 8 Billion Dollars that is supposed to be in the bank doesn’t really exist. Yes, another accounting scandal like the Enron Story. I had been with the company for more than 5 years at that time and this news shook my roots. Medical Insurance Company stopped processing our bills for a week, I wasn’t sure if I will get my next paycheck, the company was a black mark in the corporate history of India. Scores of clients were stopping projects and it was bad news after bad news. I didn’t have a visa that allowed me to move to another company in US and the job market in India wasn’t great either. The only option I had was to stick to my company Satyam and get sucked into the abyss if it went that way. When I came back home, I didn’t know how to break the news to my wife; my son was 4 and daughter was 6 months at that time. For the sake of my colleagues & my family, I put on a brave face and did what best I can in the situation. I had to sell off all that I had, give up my faith in the great American Dream and go back to India with family. When I was in India, I was passionately involved in presales activities to bag a new client project and moved back to California within 2 months. After few months, I applied for an open position in Lowe’s. The first interview question (from my manager Muthu) was, when are you going to come back? It was a great refresher. Yes, after 6 years in Satyam and after more than 1 year of the scandal I joined Lowe’s as an Employee. (Contrary to market expectations, Satyam is doing great still)

The journey was tiring but when I reached the next destination, it reinforced my trust in nature. The lesson I learnt are,

• Never burn the bridges. You should leave a mark that people should feel like working with you, not find excuses to avoid you.

• If we can deal with uncertainty, we will become calm and open enough to identify the opportunities and say “yes, the world is large enough”!

Let us talk about my second inspiration

I strongly believe in one concept....life looks at the state we are in and desperately wants to talk to us. It chooses anybody we come across to tell us how to improve. For me, this super intelligence almost all the time chooses my wife to talk to me. She is my most honest critic and my biggest support. My wife always has very high expectations from me. Trust me friends, it is nothing less than being a Super Hero!

Either I can grow to meet the expectation that life poses through my wife or I can give up and let it spiral down.

Dr. Wayne Dyer gives lectures in YouTube and leaves my life, he is a good guy....but life though my wife is my 24/7 performance appraiser. How am I performing?...my scores are not that great, but I have not given up. She is the one who untiringly reminds me that this world is large enough if we make ourselves eligible!

• My perspective changes when I look at my wife’s feedback as the life’s feedback to me.

• Instead of showing resistance this perspective helps me to evolve and say yes the world is large enough.

I have a question for you, “Are you living the dream which you dreamt of when you were a child?”

Let me ask the question differently, “Do you have better resources now than you had during your childhood to achieve what you want in life?”

Let me simplify the question, “Are you alive now?” If you are reading this, Congratulations, you are already a winner! As a kid you never knew for how long you will be alive, you have already outlived your expectations and now you have a solid foundation to start!

We wait for a lottery to change our live. No, don’t wait for a lottery to change your life, YOU are your lottery. Invest in yourself, evolve and you will realize that this world is large enough for all of us!

Listen, life wants to tell you something, “Don’t you worry, don’t you worry child, this world is large enough!”

Sorry, you have to try harder to discourage me!

2013-03-26T15:40:00.003+07:00

It was one of those busy mornings and I was trying to grab a coffee from my office café before the 8 AM meeting. As I was mixing the coffee with sugar, a piece of sugar pack I tore fell in my coffee. One of my colleagues standing next to me exclaimed, “oh ooh, not a good way to start the day!”. I smiled and replied, “No Ma’m, it has to try harder. I don’t get discouraged that easily”.

Dare to be upbeat!

In the Seas(Cs) of Succccccccess!

2013-03-20T21:01:00.003+07:00

In the Seas(Cs) of Succccccccess!

Here are some Cs to help you swim in the seas of success.

Cs of Success

Content

This is the foundation of success.
If we don't have content, we can only hoodwink for a short term.
Get yourself clear about your area of interest & take a deep dive!

Courage

Small drops create a flood, small atoms make this universe.
Small steps can take you places; get courageous and be open to fail. As Edison said, "learn one more way it doesn't work" and be courageous to move ahead.

Commitment

To protect its home a bee is ready to sting and die.
The passion needn’t be to that extend, but a COMMITMENT TO GIVE YOUR BEST IN ANY SITUATION can change the course of your life, even the world!

Charisma

Charisma is not in the way you look but the way you carry yourself.
Anybody & everybody will like to be around a person who is always enthusiastic and exuberant.
Find out what ticks you, what keeps your morale high…use it in all situations!

Connect

We are social animals.
Unless we are comfortable with ourselves, we will never be ready to get out of our comfort zone to connect to somebody new.
When we connect, we realize that we can achieve more with our potential & that we can achieve more as a team!

Communicate

With all respect to our listeners & readers, it is very important that we present our thoughts & ideas clearly.
If my listeners asks me to repeat again, it doesn’t mean they are stupid; it is because I have not communicated clearly.
Unless one knows to communicate effectively, we can never let the world know what we want!
Listen attentively if somebody is talking to you, in hallway or in a meeting (with closed laptop/phones away).
Join a Toastmaster’s or a Dale Carnegie club near you and improve your communication skills!

Coflict Management

Let us accept that no initiatives can be conflict free.
If viewed with right perspective, conflicts can be source of new ideas if each idea is respected irrespective of the idea source.
Unless we know to channelize the conflicts, we cannot move us or our organization ahead.

Collaborate

To collaborate better we have to have Content, be Courageous, be Committed, be Charismatic, be well Connected to all we work with, Communicate clearly on what we want and manage Conflicts better.

Make your success sweeter & stronger by adding more Cs! Have a fantastic one!

The Magic Word!

2012-05-28T21:37:00.001+07:00

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This is the content of my speech that helped me win 1st place in 2012 Area 23 (NC, USA) Toastmasters International Speech Contest representing my organization (Lowe's Companies Inc.). I will be glad if this inspires you.
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When was the last time your life was magical? Was it few days or a few decades ago?

I recently saw a Jim Carrey Movie. He is single, his job sucks and his life is a mess. Based on advice from his friend he goes to a seminar. In the seminar the Guru goes "Life, we are all living it. Change, is generated from consciousness. Where is consciousness generated? From the external. How do we control the external? With one word and what is that word?" The crowd erupts "YES". Jim Carrey ends up making a covenant that he will say YES, no matter what and his life becomes magical.

Please take a moment to think how many times your life has become magical by saying YES. How many times you have regretted that you said NO without even giving it a try? Probably to your friend or a new opportunity.

Watching this movie "Yes Man", made me reflect on lot of incidents in my life which changed the entire course of my life due to these 2 simple words YES and NO. I would like to recount 2 incidents from my life and connect the dots.

Incident 1:

During my college days in India, I had Windows desktop and a musical keyboard. I used to compose small bits of music. I used to play it to my friends and family. I don’t what others thought about my music, but I loved my composition a lot. I was thinking I was a very good composer. Unfortunately I didn’t really build on this interest in music. After college, I joined the rat race and became a regular guy. 8 to 5 work in a metropolitan city in India and fun with friends in the evening. When I met one of my college mates after 2 years, I got to know that she was working as a marketing executive for a music training company. She jokingly said, “As you compose music I am going to make you my victim, why don’t you take up training in music composition”. What do you think I said? I said “NO”. I thought, “How can somebody teach you to compose music? Music should come from within”. I thought it was a scam.

After a few years I saw an advertisement for Digital Music Composition and Audio Engineering. I went to that facility. The place was like heaven; each student’s desk had a Mac, a musical keyboard and head sets. This was the same place my college mate wanted to me join few years back and the same place where Oscar winning Music Composer A R Rehman’s students were getting their skills built. I was supposed to leave India in a few days. So although I wanted to join, I couldn’t take it up; life didn’t give me a second chance. That remains as one of the biggest regrets of my life! If I had said YES the first time, probably I would have got an Oscar in 2010 with AR Rehman and would be singing “Jai Ho…jai ho”. Alas!

Incident 2:

When I was working in Bangkok, Thailand I wanted to try scuba diving. I was inspired by watching James Bond doing a sky dive from a flight and changing to scuba gear before landing in the ocean. I didn’t want to try the entire part but just the Scuba one. When I was talking to my colleagues, one of them suggested that I should talk to the Program Manager as he goes scuba diving. What do you think I said? I said “YES”. When I asked about it to the Program Manager, what do you think he said? He said “YES”! He mentioned that he was planning to go to Koh Tao Island in Thailand which is supposed to be one of the top 10 most beautiful islands in the world for Scuba Diving and he wanted to know if I would be interested in joining him. What do you think I said? I said “YES”. You see, it requires so many YESes to get things moving.

After training in the island, when I was about to take my first dive I realized the gravity of the situation. From a world of certainty, where human beings have done their best to destroy nature; I was getting into an entire new world of the wilderness and especially unarmed. I couldn’t understand when the instructors said I cannot carry any knives. All the scuba diving I have watched was in James Bond movies where he carries harpoon or some weapon! What do you think I still said for the Dive? I said “YES”. During the training classes at 30 feet below the surface of water, my dive buddy tapped on my shoulder and pointed me to a surprise visitor. I was frozen. It was a medium sized shark swimming around; suddenly it turned and started coming towards us. I felt like it was coming for me. There was no mind, there was no feeling, there was me and the shark. As the water was crystal clear, it made the moment even more intense. Fortunately he was not hungry, he turned around and left. After facing the threat of becoming completely extinct, I lost fear of a lot of things in life.

From then on, my life became magical. I said YES and ran a 12 K Marathon nonstop in Thailand. If I can gain weight, I can lose weight too. I said YES and lost 25 pounds in 2 months. I said YES to food and gained the lost pounds back; that’s a different story. I said YES and tried ice skating and skiing in Belgium. I said YES and tried mountain biking in Wilkesboro and hiking in California.

•Life always wants you to experience the magic.

•Open yourself and keep listening to the cues.

•Be courageous; challenge yourself and dare to get out of your comfort zone.

I am asking each and every one of you the same question, “Every time an opportunity presents itself, no matter what, what will you say?” - YES! This is my gift to you today, use the gift and make your life magical!

It's never late!

2006-07-20T05:45:00.000+07:00

Everyone has a dream. Everybody has a purpose to achieve. Everybody has a target in life. Everyone has an 'ideal life', 'ideal relationship', 'ideal career', etc. in mind.

Do we pursue it?! Do we put in efforts to go towards it? Do we take initiatives to do it NOW?

It is very important to check if we are moving towards our destiny. Always we are busy with so many things in life that we don't see the direction in which we are heading. We should stop now and then to check our compass to recalibrate the trajectory. The problem with our modern life style is, we close our eyes and compete in the rat race without knowing were it might lead. If we do not stop to contemplate every now and then, we might not even realize that we might be drifting further and further away from our destiny.

Our distance from our destiny will be directly proportional to the time we have wasted in wrong directions. If we have wasted more time, we will have to spend more efforts and more time to bring us back to track. Lot of things once done will require efforts and additional time to undo, redo or to realign. For e.g., if you do not have a solid educational background or a good relationship, as time goes, your commitments will increase more and more that you will not be able to pursue your educational or the better relationship pursuits.

If you realize now that something is missing in your life, do it NOW or at least take steps to move towards it NOW....IT IS NEVER LATE!

Courtesy: The ‘two lines’ motivation is that of my 12th standard tuition teacher, Mr. Manivanan.

Locus of Control

2006-07-12T16:49:00.000+07:00

~ There is an ardeous task at hand, and you are not confident as this is the first time you are tackling the issue.
~ You see some useless guys (according to you) succeed in life.
~ You took up something that you are not sure about and it was a fiasco.
~ There are too many problems in this world that you are not able to succeed.
~ Your career seems to go nowhere.
~ You are having lot of financial troubles.
~ You do not get along with people.

In these situations do you,
1) Get overwhelmed by these situations and get carried away? Do you also react with hatred, ego, anger or frustration?

2) Or, do you remain calm and see how you can set things right and make the parties involved to understand and feel better?

Do you see the difference between the two approaches? Approach 1 is REACTING and Approach 2 is RESPONDING.

Both the words seem to have the same meaning. Do you wonder ‘what the heck is the difference?!!'

Well the explanation given by the philosophers, yogis and gyanis is that, if you are able to be with awareness and let your Consciousness, Virtues and Values guide you then you are RESPONDING. If you get carried away by the negativity of the situation and you also take the same emotional shades of the negative situation, then you are reacting!

Hmm...so you are thinking this is another philosophy funda that is good to talk/hear and not so good to implement. Well, first to give you confidence on this concept, I would like to bring to your notice that, all that the philosophers talk about is actually a MANAGEMENT FUNDA! Yes, it is scientifically classified under LOCUS OF CONTROL in human psychology!! The point of this article is not to argue on who copied from whom, but to help you implement these better in life.

LOCUS OF CONTROL says, there are two kinds of people in this world. The people who have an EXTERNAL locus of control that they get influenced by the external environment and second the people with INTERNAL locus of control, who are mature and strong enough to influence the external environment to make it better. So, concept says that the best personalities are the ones who are ones who are with the INTERNAL LOCUS OF CONTROL. They are able to succeed better as they do not waste their energy by making things worse by reacting and believe that they control their own destiny.

From my experience, I would like to list out the ‘know hows’ and ‘to dos’ to achieve INTERNAL LOCUS OF CONTROL

1) RESPOND, don't react.
2) Understand that ANY human being's core virtues are PEACE, LOVE and HAPPINESS. Either you know it or you are yet to know it, but it always is your core virtue.
3) Stress Management - You might have observed that chances of you REACTING is more when you are enervated/exhausted and you RESPOND better when you feel fresh and energetic. Don't carry any luggage anytime; from office-to-home or home-to-office or office-to-office or home-to-home. Find ways to relieve your stress.
4) Believe in yourself. Have RESPECT for yourself and others as one of your core values. Always react to all with respect and respect yourself by not spoiling your mood.
5) Be aware at all times, keep the balance and respond with consciousness. All situations in life are trying to teach you something. See if you are learning the lesson.
Do you want to know what your locus of control is?! Click on this link to check it out!
Don't choose the best answer, choose the best answer that suits your current personality!

Don't run away!

2006-07-10T07:35:00.002+07:00

It was a Sunday morning in 2003. I was in Marina Beach, Chennai, India for a get-together. We formed two groups for a game. Group 1 were to be in the outer most circle and Group 2 inside a circle. The people in the outer circle group have to hit the people in the inner circle with a ball and people in inner circle getting hit are out of the game. After the first round, the groups switch places.

As I was in the outer circle in first round, I was observing to understand the secret as we played. Lot of people were trying to hide in the inner part of the circle. Who do you think is the most vulnerable to get hit?! The ones facing the ball? Yes, I also thought so; but it is the ones who were hiding behind were getting out of the game very fast. That struck me that ones who were facing the ball were able to easily avoid it as they were able to see where the ball is coming. The ones hiding had left it to chance and got hit as soon as the ones facing the ball avoided it.

I was glad that my secret worked when I played in round 2 and I was able to avoid the ball easily. It also increased my focus as I had to respond very fast when the ball was thrown in my direction. Once when I couldn’t manage to face the ball I got hit. Though I was out of the game, I was overjoyed that I had used my awareness to help me have my best game.

As I came out, I was contemplating on what I learnt. It dawned on me that this is how real life is. It was an enlightening moment when I sensed that this might be a secret to success in life!

* FACE challenges in life head on, you'll feel the acceleration of energy and the satisfaction of being courageous.
* As popularly said, "ACTION CURES FEAR"; do what u fear!
* Hiding and escaping only makes the problem big; at the least, in your mind!
* By being aware, even if you lose, you'll be satisfied that you did the best and you'll know where you failed. So success might be just another try away.

I tell this real life incident to the ones who try to avoid problems. Whether they get excited or not, I get excited whenever I get a chance to narrate this.

Don't run away, your best resources are inbuilt. You Can!

Empty cup and a Hollow bamboo

2006-07-08T08:09:00.000+07:00

Though there are lots of dimensions to personal fulfillment, I believe that it starts from self and ends in the self. So, I would like to start from the self.

A plant grows only if it takes in the nutrients, water and sunlight. The fruits of the plant will be as better as the amount of energy it is able to assimilate. The quest for learning will fulfill the needs to nourish our minds. The key to learn new things is in the attitude to listen and receive.

Answer these questions to know if you are open:

Do you listen to people and their suggestions despite their difference in economic, social, cultural, or racial background or their difference in age, color or language from yours?
Do you process criticisms (positive or negatively presented) properly by looking at only what the person wants me to improve rather than focusing on the feelings (hatred, jelousy, or egoistic) with which it was presented? ....well yea, a positive criticism will emotinonally uplift you to make the changes easily...but do you respond to a +ive criticism +ively?
Do you read (either technical, philosophical or general based on your interests) extensively? Even if the ideas presented are conflicting with your beliefs, do you atleast take some time to think about it?
If you are in a tough situtation in your life, do you try to see what is the good that life is trying to make us learn from that incident?
If you have done some mistake, do you waste your time repenting or do you open yourself to accept it as a good teacher and learn to lead a better life by not repeating it again?

Even if the opportunity to learn is vast are we ready to learn?

To create an internal learning enviroment, see if your mind is like an empty cup and your whole self is like a hollow bamboo.

Spend some time with yourself to see how ready you are to RECEIVE, LEARN and to GROW!