The Garden

The simple things in life....

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Sun, 15 May 2011 13:04:00 +0000

Sometimes you see something that really makes you stop and think. Sometimes you see something so out of the ordinary that you just have to wonder how it actually happened. Well, that happened to me recently, but not because of what I saw, but for the reason I saw it.

I was watching the news not that long ago, and a story came on about a man who received a package in the mail, but it was not his address on the box. The man went to the address on the box and gave it to the person the box belonged to. Inside this box, as the owner would later say, was a $15,000 watch. The person who originally received the package did not open it, nor did he know what was inside. So here is the part that really makes me wonder about the world we live in:

The news story was about a man who received someone else's property, and returned it to the rightful owner! Is this morally correct act now so rare that when it happens we send a news team out to cover the event? Are we so far away of doing what's good and what's right in this world that we have to broadcast when someone actually does the right thing?

I have an old blog entitled "Uncommon Courtesy", because society is becoming filled with the idea of entitlement , and selfishness. People no longer say thank you when you hold the door open for them, because they EXPECT you to do that. They have lost sight of someone extending courtesy to them. No one is required to say "Bless you" when you sneeze, pick up something that you dropped, let your car into the lane of traffic, or to wait, and hold the door open for you. Although these people do it because they know it is the courteous thing to do, and do it because they want to, not because they want acknowledgement, it is up to you to realize that they are going out of their way for you; a complete stranger. Why would you not acknowledge their kind deed? And it is because of these actions on the individual level that leads us to send out a news team to cover when someone actually does the right thing. If this sense of selfishness and entitlement continues, we will soon be sending out a news team to cover the breaking story of someone holding a door open for a stranger.

It can be frustrating when you are the one always doing these small, kind acts for others without receiving acknowledgment. But continue to remember why you do it: Because you are living from your highest self, and putting others needs before your own. This does not require a thank you, because doing the right thing shouldn't have to be complimented. It is what we should be doing anyway. And hopefully, we will inspire someone who sees us to then start living from their higher self. And if that continues, then we won't sit through the news story about the person who said "Bless you" to a stranger at the mall when they sneezed.

Love and light......

Thoughts to ponder....

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Mon, 09 May 2011 00:51:00 +0000

Hello all.... Wow, what a month! I took time to get stuff together, and boy did the abundance flow! The website is coming along well, and I've been doing a bunch of writing for some spiritual productions coming up. But I have been a little lax writing here, and for that, I'm truly sorry.

However, I do tweet a few spiritual thoughts a day, so if you're not following me yet, come and follow me at @thegardensgate. So I figured I'd catch you up on some random thoughts you may have missed while I've been away, but have sent out via twitter. Enjoy!

Opinion looks inward, while judgment lashes out.

Peace isn't something you seek, it's something you create.

We get information when we need to hear it, not when we want to hear it. It is always a message of work we have to do.

Do not be afraid when negative feelings fill you. It is a sign from the Universe of the things we need to address.

Given the choice, I choose to see the good in people.

Your problems are much like a weed. You must pull the root to solve them, not just keep cutting off the leaves.

Even the largest oak tree started from a seed.

When you find peace within yourself, you find peace in the world.

What you are is never as important as who you are.

So, there you go. Some random thoughts to keep the positive energy flowing! I hope you enjoyed them. I really like sending those thoughts out on twitter. It just feels like I can keep the positive flow of energy flowing through the Universe! I hope you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy writing them!

Love and light to you all...

Why ask why?

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Thu, 31 Mar 2011 21:44:00 +0000

Recently, I had a conversation with someone lost in the question of "why", so I thought it would be a good time to bring back an older blog for a little insight on the question "why"? Enjoy!

Most times, when something goes wrong in our lives, the very first question we ask ourselves is "Why?" Unfortunately, this is the worst question we can ask ourselves. Some people live so much in the question of why, that they never get past the event that made them say it to begin with. Why, you see, is a useless question. It never really matters why. Remember when you were a kid, and you wanted to do something, and your parents said no, and you asked them "Why?" and they answered, "Because I said so, that's why." That, in essence, is actually the best answer to your question. Because it doesn't matter why. It only matters that you can't do whatever they told you you couldn't do. "Mom, John's having a party, can I go?" Your mother responds "No." "Why?" You ask. It doesn't matter why. Maybe it's because you have to do something else. Maybe it's because your mom doesn't think much of John. Maybe it's because she knows that no one wants you at the party, or maybe it's none of those things. The fact of the matter is, you can't go. So "Why" you can't go becomes irrelevant.

"Why are we here?" "Why did this have to happen to me now?" "Why is the store always sold out of what I came for?" So many questions of why, and in each case, it doesn't matter why. It doesn't matter why you're here, because you are indeed here. It doesn't matter why something happened to you now, because it did indeed happen. And it certainly doesn't matter why the store is out of what you came for, because nothing is going to make it magically appear in their stock. So as you can see, "Why" is a useless question.

It's useless because it only leads to more questions. It never leads to action. And in this way, many people get locked into the trap of "Why". The question of "Why" also leads to all the "what if's" that take people out of the present moment, and lost in a hypothetical world of things that don't exist. And no matter how much you wish that they would, they don't. You only have NOW. Asking "What if this would have happened instead?" is just a way of mentally torturing yourself. With that in mind, the correct questions to ask yourself instead of "Why", are "What", and "How".

You must first accept the situation as it is. This is important. Acceptance is the first phase of overcoming any obstacle. Then, ask yourself the questions of "What" and "How". So, in the example above of "Why did this have to happen to me now?" The replacement for the question of "Why" is "Ok, this happened to me. What can I do to make this situation better, or how can I prevent this from either getting worse, or happening to me again?" "What" and "How" are calls to action. And when you are taking action, you have control over the situation, instead of the situation having control over you. Remember, if you feel that something has happened to you, then you are a victim. Victims never overcome their obstacle. You are only a victim in the moment that something is happening in your life. Once that moment is over, how you choose to react to that situation will define you either as a victim, or, for lack of a better word, a survivor. Some people are a victim of an event for the rest of their life. They use it as an excuse to never be able to achieve things in their lives. They'll tell you "You don't understand what happened to me". The ego is in full force. You may not have control over what happened to you at the time it happened, but you certainly have control over every single moment after that. How will you choose to react to that? From weakness, or strength?

There are so many beautiful cases in which someone has overcome so much. I recently read about a quadriplegic that swam the English Channel. He lost his limbs after being electrocuted on a ladder. But he did not remain a victim of that accident. He has been living his life, including not only swimming the English Channel in just over 14 hours, (10 hours less than even he thought it would take him), but skydiving, and things like that. He could have lived the rest of his life lost in the question of "Why". "Why did this have to happen to me". But he chose the "What" and the "How". What could he do to keep living his life? How can he make his life better? He was only a victim for the moment of the electrocution, now he is a survivor, and deals from a place of strength.

"Why" is a trap of the ego. It begs for sympathy for us from others. It wants others to do for us what we feel we cannot do for ourselves, because we are a victim. If you live your life lost in the question of "Why", it will be a very unhappy place to live. If you turn your mind into the action questions of "What" and "How", you will see amazing changes start to take place in your life.

Love and light.........

A simple story about a fisherman....

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Fri, 25 Mar 2011 01:18:00 +0000

There once was a man that lived in a farming village, yet he was a fisherman. The river that passed this village was too swift to provide any fish for the fisherman, and it was very dangerous by the shore. But this man fished every day. Some days he would catch a fish, but most days he did not. But he had friends in the farming village, and even though he couldn't make the living he wanted to make, he stayed at the village, because that's what was comfortable to him.

One windy day, the fisherman went to the river's edge to cast his line into the river. He did not notice that the jagged rocks on which he stepped were wet from the crashing of the waves with the wind. Upon casting his line out into the water, the man slipped, and fell into the brisk river. In a panic, he grasped tightly to a few small jagged rocks protrouding from the river.

The waves on this windy day crashed upon the man, smashing his body into the rocks, yet he continued to grasp onto the rocks with all his might. "I can't let go", cried the man. He thought of his friends in the village that he would never see again if he were to drown. He thought "even though I do not have the life I have wanted, I still want to stay right here!". So the man clinged to the rocks as if it were his lifeline.

What the man did not realize, was that what he clinged to so tightly, was actually killing him. By remaining on those rocks, the waves from the swift river were pummeling his body into the rocks, slowly ending his life. What he thought was the comfort of safety, was the pinnacle of danger.

More waves came crashing in, and the man smashed his face upon the rocks. As his pain grew worse, finally the light went off. "What I cling to is actually hurting me!" "If I keep holding on, I will surely die. But if I let go, there's a chance that I will not drown." So the man took a deep breath, gathered his courage, and with faith, let go of the rocks.

The man was quickly swept into the river, but to his surprise, he did not get pulled under the water. In fact, he was able to float! The river whisked him away, and as it did, he began to see things he had never seen before. "This land is so beautiful! I've only seen the farming village where I lived. I never knew such beauty existed!". The man continued to float on the river, and soon, he realized that he could also control where he was going. "I can control which way I move, just by using my arms!". As the river twisted left and right, so did the man, now in control of where he was floating.

After a while, the river started to become peaceful. The man looked around with wonder. "I can't believe I'm here", he thought. After a few minutes, he saw a fisherman on the shore. The man on the shore called out to him. "Are you ok?" "Yes", relied the man. The river was now calm enough that the man was able to swim to the shore. He explained to the man on the shore that he was a fisherman from a farming village way up the stream. The other man laughed. "Why would you be fishing in a farming village? That seems awfully silly". The man thought about it and said "Now that you mention it, it is. I never really caught anything". The other man asked "Then why did you stay?" The man replied "I didn't know anything else, and I was comfortable there. Even though I didn't have the life I wanted, it wasn't bad. It just wasn't..... good." The other man laughed. "Well, you will like it here then. This is a prosperous village. We have both farmers AND fisherman! But we need some more. Would you be interested in staying with us?" The man did not have to think about it at all. After all he had been through, he saw now what the Universe intended for him to see all the time.

If he would have continued to hold on to something that wasn't good for him, he would not have been able to find where he fit in. And although the journey was frightening at first, he soon learned that he had much more control than he thought he did. And finally, he found out that what he thought he wanted, was not what he wanted at all. And when he got what he needed, he realized that's what he wanted the whole time.

The Universe dreams dreams for us that are so much bigger than anything you could possibly dream for yourself. But if you are holding on to something that you need to let go of, those things will never manifest themselves in your life.

So, are you going to continue to hold on to the rocks and get battered, or are you going to move forward with faith, and see all of the infinite number of possibilites that are in store for you?

Move foward with faith, not fear.

Love and light to you all..

Judgement, Understanding, and Acceptance

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Tue, 15 Mar 2011 22:32:00 +0000

Did you ever wonder where judgment comes from? Why people judge someone for what they wear, who they are, or even what they practice? Most people confuse judgment with opinion, in that they do not feel they are being judgmental, just expressing their opinion. The difference, is that judgement is outward, and opinion is inward. Take for instance someone wearing a shirt that a person doesn't like. They might say "that shirt is ugly". That is a judgment. The shirt is neither ugly, nor is it pretty; it is just a shirt. An opinion, which looks inward, is "I personally don't care for that shirt." Since you make it about you, and not about the shirt or the person wearing it, your opinion is not destructive. It is simply a reflection of you. Another example of this, is "That tv show is stupid". By saying that, you are judging not only the show itself, but the creator of the show, the cast, crew, and people who watch it. After all, if the show is stupid, you must be stupid to watch it! But the show is neither stupid, nor smart. It is simply a show on television. When you say "I don't care for that show", the only implication is on yourself, and therefore, is an opinion.

But where does this judgment come from? Well, if you continued that last judgment above, it may give you a clue. "That tv show is stupid. I don't understand how anyone can watch that!" And there you have it. Most people are afraid of the things they don't understand, and it usually comes out in the form of judgment. Now, for a tv show, that might not be too big of a deal. But what happens when you are talking about another human?

Whether it is alternative lifestyles, clothing, traditions, or behaviors, many people do not find peace within themselves because they "just don't understand". Why is understanding so important to humans? Why is it they have to have a clear cut, determining word or action to have something they can try to understand? The insecure feelings on a subconscious level with people that do not understand something, causes fear, and negative reactions to the things, or people, in which they don't understand. But let me ask you this. How many people understand how the motor in their car works? With electronic fuel injections, valves in the cylinders, compression, and all the many other factors that make your car go forward, how many people truly understand all the hundreds of instantaneous actions that happen in their engines to make their car go forward? Yet they don't hate their car. They don't ignore or berate their cars because they don't understand how they operate. What they do is accept that the motor drives their car. And with that acceptance, comes peace. How many people truly understand how electricity is created in a nuclear power plant, and is then transmitted all the way to the light switch in their bedroom? Do you think about that every time you turn on the light? Of course not. Because you simply accept that when you flip the switch, the power comes on.

Yet when it comes to people that are different from themselves, there is no acceptance, only judement, followed by the wonderful "I just don't understand why you _______________". You can fill in the blank with anything, it really doesn't matter. If people can accept others for who they are, instead of judging them because they don't understand why they do something, peace will come into the world. After all, everyone, and I mean everyone on this planet wants to be accepted for who they are, yet most everyone is not ready to give that same respect back to others. Since you only see the world from your eyes, and since you don't understand why someone is doing that, or wearing that, or wants to live like that, then you judge them based solely on your own beliefs in your own life. If you would fall back on opinion, instead of judgment, no dis-comfort would arise inside of you. You would simply accept, and say "I choose not to do ____________". With no dis-comfort, fear cannot exist. Without fear, no negative energy would be created towards the other person.

If you think it can't be that simple, go back to your car. Have you ever had a verbal altercation with your car because you didn't understand engine viscosity? No, you just let your car do what it does, and you do so in peace. You can do the same in this world towards others. You do not need to understand everything. Just accept things for the way they are, and if you don't like it, realize that is simply inside of you, and has no business being directed outside of you.

So, next time you hear yourself saying "that guy is stupid", or "That person should live their lives different", bring it back to yourself. Start the sentence off with you as the subject. "I don't like the way that person is living their lives". It will be an interesting insight into yourself. What about you does not like it? It is because you do not accept it. Once you accept, the judgment is gone, and there is peace. And when there is peace, understanding is possible.

Remember, we are the human race. Which means we are all humans. Which means we are all the same. Only people, inside of themselves, create separation.

Follow me on Twitter!

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Tue, 15 Mar 2011 21:05:00 +0000

Need a little spiritual boost in your day? Want a nice spiritual quote to pick you up on a blah day? Come and follow me on twitter! Each day, I send out a spiritual quote or two to keep you thinking, growing, and feeling good!

Go to twitter and search for "thegardensgate", and click on follow!

Thanks, and enjoy the tweets!

You can't go out in your robe!

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Mon, 14 Mar 2011 14:37:00 +0000

Hey everyone! Ok, so my little hiatus is over... and some good things are coming. My main website is being built, and I will now have time to continue to update that and this blog, as well as my spiritual productions! WHOO HOO! But on the lighter side of enlightenment....

I was with some friends this weekend, and one pointed out to me that I am always joking around. How can such a spiritual person joke around so much? And so I wondered, what do people want me to do, walk around in my robe with birds on my shoulders, and animals following me around? Is that many people's idea of a spiritual teacher? And while there are many monks who practice traditions that are thousands of years old, with great dilligence, you don't have to be set in traditions to be spiritual. You just have to "Be".

I admire the sheer level of dedication to the lifestyle that the Tibetan monks live. I often feel like I want to run away and live that lifestyle, as I continue to grow. But I am who I am. I am a beautiful representation of the Universe in human form, as we all are. How could I not be me? As I've said before, there's beauty in differences. If we were all the same, the world would be a boring place. The Universe made me just like this, so how could I possible question it, or not be me?

I think some people get lost in this idea. They think they are going to lose part of themselves once they start releasing attachment, bringing the peace within to outside experiences, and living from one's higher self. The only parts you lose when you start on the path are the ones that keep you attached to worldly things. But the best of you will shine! Your light will be brighter than ever.

What people seem to notice most about me when they meet me, is my peaceful energy. That's because that's where I come from. My inner peace. But I still like to laugh! I still think the world is funny! I still hug my friends, I still attempt to dance.... (Notice the word "attempt"), and I still have an outgoing personality. Most of that helps me connect very quickly with people, and in turn, help the teaching process. Because all I can be, is me. And I am me, and I am on a spiritual journey; no robe required.

So enlighten up! It's not the end of you, it's the beginning of a more peaceful you! Buckle up, and enjoy the ride!

March 5th is coming!!

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Sun, 20 Feb 2011 16:53:00 +0000

Well, there may not be anything too special about March 5th, but I am anxiously awaiting its arrival! Because that's when I make a huge change in my life!

As you all see, there are a lot of days in between my posts here.... mostly because I have not had a lot of time. But after March 5th, I will have more time to write! I am leaving a job that has given me a sense of security for some time, but it has gotten in the way of me being able to move forward with my spiritual teaching. For this reason, I am taking the leap of faith and leaving that security behind to concentrate on continuing waking up the world to a new way of being! Have you noticed that the world needs it? I have!

So, the full business will be launching soon, complete with my new website, new blog entries, and lots and lots of other good things! I can't wait!!

So get ready world, because I'm coming to make a difference!

Random Thoughts

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Wed, 02 Feb 2011 01:59:00 +0000

I have so much to write about right now..... lot's on my mind. This isn't going to be like my regular blogs, but some random thoughts on things I've seen recently. Welcome to my world..... enjoy your stay.

Only you can help yourself. Others cannot help you. You are the one who has to do the work. When you choose to do the work, you will find everything you need enter your life. If you were drowning, and a boat came by, would you ever think about not getting into it because you thought it was too small? If you were starving, and someone offered you a sandwich, would you really not accept it because it wasn't your favorite sandwich meat? It's amazing how many people live thier lives this way, crying out for help, but deciding it is not the help they want. In the end, these are the people with nothing, even though they had everything offered to them. Remember this: Miracles do not have to be big to be miracles.

I find the phrase "Common Courtesy" to be misleading. Too many people are in too much of a rush for courtesy. In fact, it's quite uncommon to find courtesy in the world any longer. It is amazing that you will have a reaction like "I can't believe you did that!" when you do something nice. Shouldn't that be the norm? I am always amazed when someone is so suprised that I held the door for them, or pick up something that they dropped. These things happen without me even thinking about them. Strangely enough, there then are those who will not even say thank you for helping them. I feel a great deal of compassion for them, as it must be tough to hurt like that inside that when you are shown loving kindness, you turn away from it. I will always be the love I wish to see in the world, and I will always have compassion for those who at this time, are not able to feel it.

Do not dwell in the past, nor stay adrift in the future. There is only now. This seems like a simple concept, but so many people live like the past or the future is so much more important than the only thing they actually have some control over: The present. Everything you need is right here, right now. What you choose to do with it is up to you. But one thing is for sure, if you are not present in this moment, it will turn into those dreaded past moments you are continuously lamenting.

Finally.... Just "be", people! Be you! Be the best version of you you can be! Do not wish to be someone else. You are a beautiful and intricate part of the Universe, and without you, other things could not be. Be happy! Be the love you wish to see in the world. Be the peace you wish to have in your life. See how beautiful things happen when you put other's needs ahead of your own. Do not want! All pain comes from want and desire. Set your goals, then let it go. If you don't reach them, you may find that you got something else that you wanted even more! The Universe dreams dreams for you that are so much larger than anything you can dream for yourself. Let it go. Free your mind.

Be.

Love and light to you all....

Life Insurance

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Sun, 30 Jan 2011 01:26:00 +0000

A friend of mine was very concerned the other day about life insurance. He was worried about what would happen to those he cared about if he died. Of course, my simple comment to him was "IF you die?" He stopped, thought, and proceeded slowly... "When I die?" "Yes, when you die." I replied. Noting the look on his face, I reassured him that there are many ways to protect those in your life when you die. "But have you thought about death insurance?" I quipped. "Death insurance?" he said with a laugh. Then I looked at him seriously, and asked him "What are you doing in this lifetime to insure what happens to you when you die?"

We had quite an amazing talk, and I had taken him in directions he has never thought of going before. The first area is Karma. Are you erasing your Karma on this earth, or creating it? Are you learning the lessons you were meant to learn here, or are you blindly going through life living the lie of society? Are you playing the game of "He with the most toys at the end wins?" Or, are you releasing yourself from attachment, and instead of taking something from this world, are you working on bringing something to this world?

Most people believe that life and death are two distinctly different things. You live, then you die. The mind continues to separate in this world. There is no life without death, just as there is no death without life. At this very instant, you are living and dying at the same time. You are doing both-- rather, you ARE both. So what are you doing in relation to the world at this moment? As my friend is so focused and scared about what happens to his family when he dies, is he putting in the same effort to insure a peaceful transition when his life on this plane ends?

If you can free your mind of the division, the separation that you create on this planet, you can see that we are all one. And if we are all one, then what you want for you, you cannot help but want for all. If you are hungry, then you will want to eat. If we are all one, then we all want to eat. So when you think of eating, why not think "Who can I feed tonight?" When you want to get dressed in the morning, think "Who can I clothe today?" And when you move into this awareness, then you are walking firmly on the path. There is no more worry about life and death, for you see that it all exists simultaneously, and that it is ok. There is nothing to fear, and there is nothing to plan for. You cannot help but develop a deep sense of peace: a "oneness" with the world. You have created your "death insurance" policy.

Remember that what you have, will fade much quicker than what you have done. So while you are out there getting your life insurance, maybe it's time to stop and think about what you're doing about your "death insurance". Because the Karma related to what you have done on this planet will stick with you much longer than any insurance policy can pay out.

Words with friends

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Sun, 23 Jan 2011 15:47:00 +0000

We all have them. Those strange but wonderful friendships where we talk to them differently than anyone else around. Where if someone were to overhear, and not know you're friends, they might be astounded at what you're saying to each other. But to you and your friend, it's just fun, lighthearted banter.

But what are your words really saying, and how can they affect your world? We see them simply as little jokes, the private ones you share only with that person, or perhaps even a particular group of people. Can those words you use in jest really disrupt your world? The answer, suprisingly, is yes.

All words have an energy field, a tone, a degree of emotion behind them. destructive word is a destructive word, regardless of if it is used in a lighthearted fashion. They set a tone for a feeling inside you. The idea is, if everything you say comes from a place of love, then a word not associated with love cannot come from your mouth. You cannot use the word "ugly", if all you see is beauty around you. This word cannot be used in jest, because it would basically cease to exist in your vocabulary. And if you take away the word "ugly" from your vocabulary, then all you can see is beauty, because you know nothing else. This is how words come from a place of love.

To illustrate this point, think about a moment that you were very intimate with someone. That moment where you felt so much love you just got lost in each other's eyes. Now imagine feeling that moment in your car when you're driving, and someone cuts you off. How difficult would it be to come out of that place of love and yell at the driver that cut you off? Because you are so far away from the feeling of anger, anger cannot come through. Now, imagine you are joking around with your best friend, and they are telling a story, and you're calling them stupid (in jest), and poking fun at them sarcastically for what they did. (Which, by the way, is part of who they are). Suddenly, that same car cuts you off. How easy would it be to get angry with that driver by calling him stupid, because the "feeling" of that word is already in play within you? We create our world with our thoughts, and we contribute to our environment with our words. If our words, even in jest, are negative in nature, our reactions to other things around us will be more apt to have a negative response to it. Remember the old phrase: "Be careful of our thoughts, for they become our words. Be careful for our words, for they become our actions." (They phrase continues, but this is the main point I am getting at now.) Our words become our actions, and if the words we use everyday are hateful, destructive, negative words, how can we not react in a negative way when advirsity arises?

I have a friend like this, and we've made the pact to no longer use any words with each other that do not come from love, even in jest. The strange side effect of this is that we laugh much more together now. (and we laugh all the time anyway) Partly because we say things like "I'm glad you called to tell me that, because I appreciate the opportunity to hear from you", and those things, even possibly said with a slight hint of sarcasm, are words of love. They make you smile. They make you laugh. They make you feel good. And when you are smiling and laughing, how can anger exist?

It's a no brainer that we should use words of love with the world. Be the love you want to see in the world. And if you get away from using words with negative connotations, even in jest, then the negative feelings associated with those words cannot exist in your world. Remember, when you remove ugly from your life, all you can see is beauty.

Love and light.........

Welcome back....

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Sun, 23 Jan 2011 15:23:00 +0000

Welcome back to my blog, and welcome to 2011! Sorry again for the leave of absence. Getting the new website up and writing the book have consumed my time, and for that I'm sorry. But wonderful things are coming. Thank you for being patient, and continuing to read my blog!

2011 is a great year for change and growth. Do not be afraid. Know that good things are coming to you and they will come. Be the love you want to see in your world. Be the peace you want to have in your life.

Remember that everything stems from INSIDE of us. Our exterior circumstances do not control us. Be who you are, do not look to be anyone else.

And most important, just "be".

Welcome back to my blog. Let's make it a great year!

Love and light to you all.

Brian

Do your actions match your goals?

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Fri, 03 Dec 2010 21:51:00 +0000

You hear it all the time, in so many situations. A friend, a loved one, and perhaps even you, say something like "I really need to save money", or "I really need to get out of this relationship", or even, "I'm going to start my own business". And how many times have you seen the person saying that just continuing to do the same things as always? This brings up an interesting question. Do your actions take you further towards your goals, or further away from them? Most people say those comments with the best intentions, but intentions are not actions. When it comes down to the action part, we see them fall away of what they said they wanted so passionately. Looking at it from the outside, we see it so very clearly, but with them looking at it from the inside, it is much more difficult to see the reasons why their goals and their actions don't match.

As I've often said, the hardest part of spiritual growth is admitting the things about yourself that you don't like. The ego doesn't want to hear that we are afraid, or angry, or jealous, or anything other than we are doing just fine! Looking into the mirror and admitting to yourself that you are not perfect may seem like an easy thing to do, but it is quite difficult when you actually have to do it. When you find that your actions are not leading you towards your goals, you must look inside and say "What about me is keeping me from my goals?" If it is a relationship, it's simply "What about me is staying in this relationship when I know it isn't fulfilling for me?" If it's money, it may be "What about me has trouble saving money?", or "What about me creates bad spending habits?". The answer is always inside of us, and the number one answer is usually fear. Fear can paralyze us from doing even the simplest of things, even if we want desperately to do it. You must remember, that doing the right thing, is very rarely doing the easiest thing. So what scares you? Being alone? Not having the security of a bank account? Not being able to be successful? On the surface as you read this, it may seem pretty silly that those things can get in the way of your goals, but when you are actually going through it, you will find your insecurities will be on the front lines, and those fears become very real.

How then, do you get past that fear and get back on track for your goals? Again, the first thing is to find out what about you is preventing you from moving forward. Let's say you are in a relationship, but you feel unfulfilled. You know it is not the best relationship for you to be in. So, you start making excuses on why you should stay. And maybe you feel that the relationship is better than being alone. Notice that you are only focused on one part of the equation. It is not all about THAT relationship, but also, the millions of possibilities that the Universe offers. A thought process such as "Who is waiting out there for me that cannot see me because I am with this person?" can start to open your mind to the infinite number of possibilities that exist out there. Another way of saying the same thing is "What am I missing while I waste my time here?" Once you put the power back within you, you can create the change you seek in your life. When you start thinking about the better things that exist out there, your fear is overcome, because you start to look at the benefits of leaving, instead of the insecurities.

Remember that fear is just misguided intention. It's when we focus more on what could happen, than what we want to happen. When you make a strong choice in what you want to achieve, and stand by that choice, then fear dissipates, and the positive change starts to manifest in your life. So, take a few minutes and write down some of your immediate goals, then see if you actions are bringing you closer or farther away from those goals. If you find that your actions do not match your goals, identify why that is, overcome that obstacle, make a strong, committed choice, and get back on the path to your goals. When you look back in the rear view mirror, you'll wonder why you weren't doing this all along.

Question of the week: How to have better meditations at home

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Mon, 29 Nov 2010 23:58:00 +0000

Q- Why can't I meditate at home like I do in a class setting?

A- That's a great question, and one that I get frequently. The answer is actually pretty simple. When you go to a class, or go to a guided meditation, or any other function where you know you are going to do a group meditation, you put your mind in a position to concentrate on what you are there for. Because you are leaving your house, driving to a location, and then looking forward to the event once you get there, your mind is already looking forward to the meditation to come. When you are at home, you have a plethora of other things on your mind, if you're like most people on this earth. When to pick up the kids, what to make for dinner, do you have time to run to the grocery store, and when you think about meditation, you are trying to "squeeze it in" in your mind. Unfortunately, the mind fits this in with all the other "chores" that you have to do, and your meditation will suffer.

Remember, meditation is actually great concentration. If your mind is believing that this is something that you have to fit into your day, then the meditation does not have your full, undivided, attention. When you go out to do a meditation, your mind is only focused on that; going to do a meditation. The kids have been picked up, you went to the grocery store, and now the only thing you want to do is go and do this meditation. You are focused. And, since then you enter the proper environment to meditate (usually group meditations are filled with beautiful energy, and the place where the meditation is going to be held is set up in Zen fashion.), your mind and body are focused and ready.

So, the answer to your question is easy. You must create your meditation space. Find a place in your house that you can set up a small area. It doesn't have to be very large, but put some of your spiritual items in here. Set the stage for your small spiritual space. Cleanse it, feel it, and breathe it in. Create and feel the sense of peace you have in your new meditation space. This is the first step. You may also use incense, candles, and even music in your space. Be careful not to make the music too loud, as you are not supposed to be focused on the music, but it should blend in the background of the ambiance.

Once you have your space, the next step is to find time to meditate. Try to find a time where you can do your meditation everyday. Whether it's first thing in the morning, or the last thing you do before bed, having a specific time to do your meditation helps, because you get into a routine. Once in a routine, if you break the routine, you feel a bit weird about it. This will keep you on track, and continue your meditation practice. This does not need to be the ONLY time of the day that you meditate, but it is the minimum required work. My teacher always said that you must meditate for 40 days without missing a day before you can be in the habit of meditation. Once in the habit, it is very difficult to break. If on the 38th day you forget, or skip it, the 40 days starts all over. Also, do not set a time limit on how long you are going to meditate. As long as you do it at the same time every day, if it lasts 5 minutes or 65 minutes, it is fine. Quality of meditation is much better than quantity of meditation. Sitting in your thoughts for 25 minutes isn't going to help the process, but 5 minutes in a good, healthy meditation will do quite a bit for you.

Lastly, get yourself comfortable. I HIGHLY recommend the use of a zafu. A zafu is a pillow of sorts, usually made out of buckwheat, or kapok, that you sit on during meditation. I find the buckwheat hulls are the best for me, but every one's taste varies. What a zafu does, is it raises the hips above the level of the knees, which opens up your spine, and with that, your energy pathways. You can see what I mean by

clicking here.

Notice that his knees are quite a bit below the level of his hips. When you sit on the bare floor, you actually start to close your energy centers and spine. You can do this on a chair to feel the difference. Sit on a chair with your feet on the ground in front of you. Your knees are bent, and your feet are flush to the floor. Now, move your feet back behind the chair, letting your knees drop, and feel the difference on your back. Feel your energy centers open up, and your spine come into alignment. The zafu does the same thing, plus, it will be much more comfortable on longer meditations.

This should get you on your way to better meditations at home! It really is only a change in the thought process. When you realize that you are in charge of your meditations, you will be able to start to meditate anywhere, even in the most distracting of environments! Good luck!

The Entitled Society

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Thu, 25 Nov 2010 01:40:00 +0000

Sorry for my hiatus. I've been meditating about a lot of things lately, and the same thing keeps popping up into my head, on TV, in the papers, and on the streets. There is such an amazing sense of entitlement in the world today. With tomorrow being Thanksgiving, and people giving thanks for the things they have in their lives, it seems like the time to call out to the world to stop the idea of entitlement.

You are not entitled to anything on this planet. You are not entitled to anything at work, in the financial markets, in housing or education, or anything else this world has to offer. What this means, is that no matter what you have, you should be grateful for it, even if it's just a small studio apartment with barely any furniture in it. You are not entitled to more; do not think you are.

In the early stages of the United States, when the colonists came, it was a dual edged sword. They thought they were entitled to the land here, even though it was already occupied by the American Indians. On the other hand, they (as well as the Indians) built strong communities based on what the needs of the community were, not on the needs of the individual. If you did not help build your shelter, then you had no shelter. You were not entitled to shelter just because you were there. If you did not go out and look for food, hunt for food, or work in the fields to cultivate food, then you ate no food. You were not entitled to it. The idea was, you either work for it, or you don't get it. That idea in the USA is long gone.

If you want more, then you have to go out and get more. Not by stealing, not by begging, and certainly not by expecting others to get it for you. You need to go out there and work for it. You are entitled to nothing on this earth. Instead of thinking how you always want more, you should be aware that you could always have less. What a difference in thinking that is, to realize that all that you have now, may be the most you ever have, and while you're out there telling everyone how much more you deserve, what would happen if you lost what you already have?

Gratitude is not in wanting. It is only in what is here and now. I've seen cancer patients, who undergo horrible treatment, making them so very weak and ill, just to be able to spend a few more weeks with their loved ones, and they are grateful for the time. Imagine, all that you want right now, and somewhere someone is hoping just for a few more days with their spouse, their child, or their friend. Gratitude is the present moment. It must lie within us, and must be one of our highest priorities. How many of you have said thank you recently just for the ability to read this? For your eyesight, your hearing, the ability to see the sunset, or hear a child's laughter? To be able to touch the face of your loved one, and have the fingers and hands to do that with?

The world is becoming such a reactionary and greedy society. The idea of "me" at all costs, no matter who it hurts. I have a great deal of compassion for those individuals out there so blind to the ways of the world, so blind to their own responsibilities on this world, those creating unwanted Karma in this world, instead of erasing it. It is with much compassion that I write this, calling out to the world to awaken. You are not entitled to anything. And when you are truly grateful for what you have, and I mean heartfelt gratitude for what you have, you will realize that you don't need anything else. One of the first questions that I ask people when I work with them is, "If your life never changes from what it is right now; your relationship status, job status, living status would never change, would you be happy?" And nearly 100% of the time the answer is "no". Well, this just may be the pinnacle of your life. You may look back at this time in the future and wish you had what you have now. So, if your answer is "no", then your job is to find a way to be happy inside with where you are now. Because you are not entitled to anything else, and there's no guarantee that you'll have tomorrow what you have today.

It's time to wake up. It's time we help the world wake up. It is up to us on the path to bring peace and joy to the world, and awaken it to a new way to see things. I am committed to this act. So, this Thanksgiving, take some time to reevaluate where you are, and what is important to you. Go a step beyond giving thanks for your food (knowing that the food you throw away is more than what 60% of the world eats), and to really, truly look inside yourself and say "thank you", for being here, for breathing (without difficulty), and for being open to all the amazing possibilities that the Universe can offer you. And know, that your happiness does not come from anything outside yourself. It is all within you.

Peace and Love to all my readers. Thank you for reading, and thank you for being patient in my absence.

Question of the week- How can I fight off desperation?

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Mon, 08 Nov 2010 13:27:00 +0000

Q- How do you keep up positive thoughts when things appear desperate?

A- First off, I want to say that if you truly feel your situation is desperate, then please, reach out and get some one on one help. Whether with a clinical psychologist, or a spiritual teacher, it is of the upmost importance that you talk more about this other than through a blog site. I am available if you would like to work with me, but again, find someone and open up.

Now, to your question. Usually when things get desperate, it is because we have been going down the wrong path for a while. We have been shown our lesson, and our path, but have decided to continue going down the path that we want to go down. It then becomes like walking against the current of a river. The key to turning this around, (and also turning yourself around), is by creating a different thought process. And the main thought process, is stop asking yourself "why", and start asking yourself "what" and "how". Instead of asking why this is happening to you, and creating the victim mentality, start asking yourself what you can do to move out of this situation, or how can you make things better. Remember, even if something bad happens to you, you are only a victim for the instant that happens. Every action of yours after that is something you have control over. But if you chose to stay in the victim role, you will not be able to move forward. Also, instead of focusing on what you don't have, start taking a hard look at what you do have. Again, this is just reprogramming your mind to stop focusing on the negative, and turning your thoughts to the positive. Even if there is only the smallest bit of something positive around you, focus solely on that then, instead of the negative. You'll find that you can see many positive things in your life if you choose to look in that direction.

If anything else, remember this: You are alive. You are here, and you are a beautiful, intricate part of the divine order. And today is a day where anything can happen. Fear is just us focusing on what could happen, instead of what we want to happen, so start focusing on what you want to happen, as long as it's from your highest self. In other words, don't want something bad to happen to someone else, because those thoughts will only come back on us tenfold. Your highest self does not think in terms of greed, revenge, or materialistic things. Our highest self only concerns itself with peace, love, joy, and equanimity. If you want to see love in your world, then bring love into your world. Everything can change, but it has to start with you. If you want a different outcome, you must do something different yourself.

This is obviously a difficult time in your life, but remember that it is only temporary. Things can get better starting today, but look for the change you seek inside yourself first. If you change what is inside, you will begin to see the change on the outside as well. And again, please, find some help. Talk to someone that can help you work through this stage you are in. Writing a question to me is a good first step, but having someone to work with on a regular basis can increase the speed of healing. If I can do anything, please contact me and I will do whatever I can to help. Love and light to you, you wonderful spiritual being!!

Controlling stress with breath work

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Tue, 02 Nov 2010 00:39:00 +0000

Ah, the holidays are upon us. For many, this time of year creates a lot of stress in their lives. As my readers know, nothing exterior can cause an internal reaction unless you let it. So, what is stress? Stress is an emotional reaction within to an external circumstance. In other words, it doesn't exist. You cannot take a can and go capture stress. It is within us, based on our reactions to a situation. And since we control our reactions, then we can control stress. But, needless to say, many people still do not do this. So, how can you start getting a peaceful reaction to your surroundings and eliminate stress? The very first rule seems simple, but it is always overlooked. Don't forget to breathe!! Our respiration controls our body systems. If we increase our respiratory rate, our heart rate will increase, along with our blood pressure, and if we keep increasing the rate, eventually your hands will cramp up and you will pass out. It's called hyperventilation syndrome, and once it starts, it is very hard to control. On the other hand, when we breathe rhythmically with controlled deep breaths, we lower both our heart rates and blood pressure, and we can create a sense of peace.

When people get stressed, they tend to hold it in a particular area; their foreheads, chest, legs, and some even start moving their feet or hands to combat the stress. It is important to identify where you hold your stress, so you can work on releasing it. The other thing that happens, is we lose track of our respiration. The pattern that develops is small, shallow breaths, usually with a period of holding that breath in between. If you consider 100% a good, full, deep breath, then the situation above would be about 33% of a normal, controlled breath. This is subconscious in nature, but it actually adds to the anxiety of the stress. The body knows something is wrong, even though consciously, you are not aware that your breathing pattern has changed. So now, you can start seeing a pattern in my teaching. As always, the first thing you need to do to be able to change your respiratory pattern, and change the stressful reaction, is to be aware that you are holding stress, and breathing improperly. Only when you are aware can you change your environment. (Have you heard that before?) Once you are aware, then simply exhale, and exhale fully, relaxing your body along the way. When you do this, it will feel really good! The tension is suddenly gone, and the body relaxes. Now you can take control of your breathing.

There are many different breath exercises to do, but this one is one of my favorites, and it is by far the easiest to teach, and easiest for the student to do. Breathe in through your nose for about 4 seconds, counting the seconds in your head. (you can use one, one thousand, two, one thousand, etc as a guide). You can shorten this or lengthen the time if you need to, but 4 seconds is a good time period. Then, hold your breath for 4 seconds, then exhale through your mouth, controlled for 4 seconds, and finally, don't inhale for 4 seconds after you fully exhale. This end part is the most important part of the exercise, as the body is in its most still position. Notice the feeling that you have when you have exhaled fully. After a few times, you will notice that you do not need to take a breath in right away. That's good. Just sit in the emptiness. Feel it. Experience it. This is where you will find your calm, and alleviate your stress. Do not pay attention to any thoughts that pop into your head. If thoughts come in, start breathing again, concentrating on the counting of the seconds. That is why we do that, to concentrate on something other than the runaway thoughts in your brain. After a while, you will notice that you are not counting anymore, yet you are not thinking of anything. Welcome to a meditative state! This is a great exercise to do on a regular basis, but it also is something simple you can do anytime you feel stressed. Combine this with relaxing your muscles when you exhale, and you will feel a calm, relaxed state. Stay here for a while, and then continue with your activities.

When you control your breathing, you control your body systems, and you will find a calm place inside of you. When you are calm on the inside, nothing outside can create the "stress" within you, since that place is already filled with calm. Remember, an external situation only effects you if you let it. If you approach the situation with calm from deep within you, then your reaction to the situation will be calm. If you react from an emotional or egotistical place, then your reaction will be filled with stress and dis-comfort. Know that you have a choice. Practicing good breath work will continuously keep you in a calm place.

Taking responsibility for your actions

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Thu, 28 Oct 2010 15:33:00 +0000

It's interesting that I'm going to write about something that should be a very basic concept, yet I'm going to write about it anyway. It's a simple matter of taking responsibility for your actions. When you always live from your highest self, taking responsibility is easy. It is easy to admit mistakes, because we all make them, and we are all constantly growing. But there are many who find it difficult to admit their mistakes, and take responsibility for their actions, as I have found out twice this week by people in my immediate circle. Remember, the ego is always in a defensive position. It is always trying to reinforce the idea that you are "right", and sometimes, it goes the path of proving that simply by not admitting that you were "wrong". In other words, if you did something wrong, as long as you don't admit to it, then you're not wrong. That is the trick of the ego, to always prevent something from happening "to" you, while it shuns your responsibility in a given situation. You are only responsible, and have control of, your actions and reactions. If you're reaction from a situation is to deny your responsibility, then you are not coming from your highest self.

How do you know when this is happening? Well, the easiest tip off, is when confronted on something that you did, you start to tell the other person what they could do to make the situation better. The lesson here is simple, if you screw something up, you fix it. By telling someone else what they could do to make the situation better, your ego is denying responsibility, because the ego never wants you to be wrong. It is absolutely amazing what happens when you say "Yep! It was my fault, what can I do to make it better?" The situation immediately becomes peaceful. There is no more anxiety between the parties, and a peaceful resolution can be found. You have also come from your highest self and bypassed your ego, and you'll find it's not that hard to do! This is a tremendous step in growth! I've said before, that one of the hardest parts of spiritual growth is admitting all the things about yourself that you don't like, and that's including that you have done things wrong in your past. And chances are, if you are addressing that concern, it is because you didn't fully take responsibility for those actions. Sometimes it is not pleasant to admit you made a mistake, or screwed something else, or your actions hurt someone else, but that is simply the ego. If you take it as a learning experience, and openly admit to what your responsibility was, you begin to find a beautiful peace, and that peace will continuously make it easier to take responsibility for your actions next time.

The dis-comfort that we feel when we are arguing over something we did, and we try to tell the others what they could do to make it better, is not caused by the situation itself, but by our reaction to the situation. You will always experience some sort of dis-comfort when you are not coming from your highest self. It is our soul pointing out to us that we need to address something. Again, when you feel pain in your knee if you injure it, it is your body telling you to pay attention to that area and fix it before you keep walking on it. The same is true in a spiritual sense. When you feel that discomfort, it is your consciousness telling you to pay attention to your actions and reactions, because there is something not right with it. If you are open to this energy, you will find it's a perfect road map to overcome ego, and it starts with taking responsibility for your actions.

Don't be afraid. It is absolutely 100% ok to make mistakes. We all do it, and we will continue to do it until we reach that enlightened state. And while admitting to your mistakes and taking responsibility for your actions will propel you down your path, not taking responsibility and making it about something or someone else will only prevent you from walking farther down your path. And your ego will keep you firmly planted where you are until you overcome it. "I'm sorry" can be the most powerful sentence you've ever spoken, both for you and for the other parties involved.

Laugh, love, learn, and enjoy the process. You will make mistakes, but they are only pointers to show you the correct way to go. Enjoy them, learn from them, and realize that they are a part of spiritual growth. And when you can openly admit to them, you will find a beautiful peace in yourself and your surroundings.

Question of the week: How long should I meditate?

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 01:33:00 +0000

Q- How long do you recommend meditating each day?

A- That's a great question, and it's a question that is asked a lot when I teach meditation. The simplest of answers is: There is no recommended time. While some say you should have a time frame in mind, I feel that once you start putting your thoughts on "time" (Which, technically, doesn't exist), then you start putting outside influence on your internal process. The fact is, I will always take QUALITY of meditation, over QUANTITY. As I tell my beginners , if they get to sit in their emptiness for only 10-15 seconds, that is much better than sitting in your thoughts for 30 minutes.

There are going to be days where you can seemingly meditate forever. I love those days. With a strong meditative practice, you can find yourself meditating for as long as you want to. But even in that practice, you may have days where you just can't get out of your own head. Even if the thoughts are good, positive, affirming thoughts, you are still in your thoughts. And unless you are doing a positive affirmation meditation, then that's really not the goal. So your meditation on those days may only be 10 minutes. It can be frustrating when the day before you were having a great 45 minute meditation, and the next day you can't "get there". Unfortunately, that adds to the anxiousness, and you start thinking about how you can't get there, and soon, you are swimming in your thoughts. On days like that when you can't get out of your own head, I really recommend starting a positive affirmation meditation, keeping your thoughts positive, and then coming out of your meditation. If you can find a minute or two to be in your emptiness, then that is better than nothing.

If you are just starting off, don't have any expectations of what it is supposed to be. Just go through your meditation and approach it with focus and concentration. If you are able to get to that place of emptiness for a few minutes, then expand on that next time. But don't set a time frame, or a schedule, as that takes away from the idea of what you're there to do to begin with. If you are an "expert", then simply let your inner self talk to you. You will know when you are done. But most of all, just enjoy the experience. Getting frustrated with meditation will never lead you to better meditations.

The only thing that I will say about "time", is that you do try to set a time to do your meditation. Not a specific time, like 11:06am, but after breakfast, or before bed. Just something that you can put into a routine, so that it becomes part of who you are, instead of something on your list of things to do for the day. In the long run, you'll get much more out of it. So, that's about it! Thanks for the question!

Seeing with different eyes.

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Fri, 22 Oct 2010 00:32:00 +0000

Sorry it's been a while since I last posted. I've been working on trying to do a video blog, and I should have one up shortly. In the mean time, I've watched a lot of people around me being very opinionated about a lot of things recently, ranging from big stuff, to little stuff. One thing I've really noticed, is that whether it's big stuff, or little stuff, it most certainly is their stuff. They are only able to see the world through their own eyes, and thus, can only see a situation from their own reality.

This is actually a quite normal function of most the population of the world. And it stands to reason, that if a person who always has life go their way meets up with a person who always seems to have life go against them, neither one of them would be able to see the others point of view. The person with the good "luck" would tell the other person how to change their life around, while the person with the bad luck would debate those ideas with all the things that go wrong in their life. This is a simple cause and effect because the person with all the good luck has never been in the person with bad luck's shoes, and vice versa, so how can you possibly know any better?

As I've said before, it is not for you to understand everything in the world, but to accept that others are not you is very important. It is also just as important to realize that you are not anyone else. This concept will help fight jealousy and envy, when you realize that what is for you is for you. But it is very important for you to be OPEN. Open to the Universe around you, open to ideas and situations that are not your own, and open to the fact that others may not share your ideas, views, or opinions. This does not make anyone right or wrong. Only ego says that to you. And more than that, if you are not open, then you have a great possibility of getting "stuck" right where you are.

The best example of this is in a relationship. If you've only ever known bad relationships, when one comes along that is better than the others, it is easy to stick to that relationship because compared to the others, it is good. But all relationships stand on their own. A person is either good for you, or they are not good for you. At some point you have to come to a realization of what you deem acceptable in your life, and how you feel you would like to be treated by others. Unfortunately, without being open to the infinite possibilities that are offered to you, you may find yourself stuck in a relationship that isn't good for you, for no other reason than it is simply a little better than all your other ones. Because you are living only your version of what your reality is, and not seeing that there can be an entirely different version all together. You are fixated on looking at your situation only through your eyes. Imagine what you could see if you pull back and look from a different perspective?

Remember that the Universe dreams dreams for you that are so much greater than anything you can dream for yourself. Also remember that your opinions end within you. They have no value outside of yourself. Remember to keep your opinions directed inside. Instead of "that's a stupid TV show", it's simply "I personally don't care for that show". This way, your opinion does not lash out at anyone else.

It is very difficult sometimes to look at something with another set of eyes. Many times, the only time we can do that is when we look back on a situation and think to ourselves "What was I thinking"? Those are fresh eyes. Now, imagine that you can have those eyes in the present moment, without having to wait years to look backwards. Well, you do have those eyes, you just have to use them. They are within you, and when you look at yourself from your highest self, with love, you will see things in a different perspective. I have often found that the Universe does not give me what I want, it gives me what I need. And pretty much every time I receive it, I realize that it is exactly what I wanted all along, whether I knew it at the time or not. So don't cling to the idea of what you "need". Just know that what you truly need is coming to you. You just have to remain OPEN.

Question of the week- Spiritual advice for losing weight.

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Mon, 18 Oct 2010 00:48:00 +0000

Q- Do you have any spiritual advice for losing weight?

A- Well, not spiritual advice that will magically shed pounds, but there are a lot of spiritual practices that you can put into your situation of losing weight to focus on your goal, and stay away from disappointment.

First of all, don't look at a scale. If you want to step on the scale to mark your "starting weight", that's fine, but then stay off of it. When you start focusing on a number, you start focusing on something that is outside of yourself. When you look at something external for solace, you will only be disappointed. You must continue to look inside. Go by how your clothes fit. And even then, don't pay attention to it every day. If you really, truly, have to get on a scale, don't do it any more than once every two weeks. I'd even say once a month. Focus on what you want to accomplish, not a number.

Second, understand that losing weight is a long term process. If I told you I could help you lose 30 lbs in 30 days, you'd probably be very happy with that. If I told you then, that it would take 9 months, you'd probably feel some sense of disappointment. What does time have to do with your intention to lose weight? Losing 30 lbs is losing 30 lbs. Don't put a time frame on it. Stay within the moment. An easy way to do this, and stay motivated, is make yourself a calendar each month, and every day, cross out the day. This way, you show that today, you did something. And after a while, you can see that you have been continuing a good habit, and accomplishing your goal. If you combine looking at the scale and the calendar, soon you will feel like giving up, because you won't feel like things are happening fast enough for you. Crossing off the days means that every day, you will do something to move closer to your goal. Stay in the moment.

Lastly, know in your heart you are doing something that is good for you. If you need to do positive affirmations, then do it! When you're working out, tell yourself that you can do it! That you are losing weight. It is imperative that you keep a healthy state of mind. If you know that you are doing something that is good for you, you will be more apt to continue to do it. So make yourself know, and believe, that you are indeed doing something good for yourself.

The path to losing weight is just like the path we're walking on. It takes time, dedication, and practice. Just keep the focus within yourself, not outside of yourself. Don't set a number you want to "be", just continue your routine until you feel like you are where you would like to be, and above all, remain aware of your thoughts. Keep the negative thoughts away, and reinforce a positive state of mind.

Good luck, and thanks for the question!!

Awesome Green Smoothies!!

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Sun, 17 Oct 2010 02:45:00 +0000

Well, I think I may have just about perfected the Green Smoothie.... well, at least to my liking. I was a bit nervous about drinking them, but I looked for recipes I thought I'd like, and finally came up with a combination that I call my own. It's good, and good for you! So, here it is:

6- medium strawberries
1-kiwi (not the skin)
Small handful of baby greens (leafy greens!)
Small handful of spinach
Small handful fresh kale greens
1/2 to 1 tblspn ground flax seed
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1-2 splenda (optional.. if it's too bitter for you, try splenda!)
Optional- small handful of frozen blueberries

Blend well, for 1-2 minutes until smooth. Add a handful of ice, blend until smooth again, and drink up!

It's packed with nutrients and anti-oxidants, but one thing to be careful of.... Go slow until you see how your body digests them. There's lots of fiber, and it will prompt you to move your bowels, which is good. You can increase to two a day after your body adjusts.

That's it! Hope you enjoy them!

What is your idea of a "Spiritual Community"?

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 01:29:00 +0000

A lot of people are interested in going somewhere for a spiritual retreat. We all have different ideas of where we would like to go. Depending on what you are interested in doing, there are so many places in the world to go and forward your spiritual path. Often times, I hear people wondering why there's no "spiritual community" in their area. As I point out to them, there are many resources available to them in their own community.

But with the different ideas of what makes up a "spiritual community", I thought I would put the question to my readers. What to you would make up a spiritual community? What would you like to have in that spiritual community to be made available to you?

Please email me by clicking here to use The Garden's main email address. Tell me what you think, and I'm going to write about what I get in an upcoming blog. Thanks, and I'm looking forward to hearing from you!!

Being Spiritual in tough times....

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Tue, 12 Oct 2010 00:34:00 +0000

So, you're on your spiritual path. You meditate, you live in the moment, you're open to, and see abundance in your life, but what happens when things go bad? This is something I do see in people, myself included. Spirituality is easy when things are going great, but what happens to you during the tough times? For me, I find it's a time of great reflection. I like to see if there's a test in front of me, or maybe something is calling to a lesson I have not fully learned yet. What is your reaction to when things get tough? I always like to say that you see someone's character when they face adversity. Adversity can bring out the drive in people, or the worst in people. Again, it is in the way you look at things. You're world is created with your thoughts, so what are you thinking? Remember the genie on your shoulder? Are you having thoughts like "This will never work for me", or "Why are these things happening to me?" Or are you in the mindset of "what am I missing?" or "What can I do to make this better?" It is when things get difficult that we are to use what we learned in our spiritual practice to approach the situation from our center with peace.

Just as you use what you have learned about math to solve a math problem, so must you use the lessons you've learned on your path to solve the problem facing you. That may be easier said than done, so here are some tips to help you out.

First, is there anything about this situation that is the same as something that I have gone through before? This question is important because not only may it help you to overcome something happening in your life similar to something else, but it may also help you to realize that you may have not completed the lesson the first time around. The Universe constantly tests us. If you find you are in the same situation again, there's a very good chance that you are the one that put yourself there. There were no thoughts or changes in behavior within yourself to create a different outcome. Remember, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome.

Second, what about this is different than what I've been through before. Reflecting on this question will awaken you to a new side of something. It may be the first time you're seeing it, or, you may realize that it's been there before, you just never looked at it in a certain way before. It may also awaken you to something new inside yourself. You may find the answer flows freely from inside of you when you take time out to reflect and see "what is" in front of you. Finding time to sit and meditate in times of crisis is very important, because you must free your mind of the clutter of not only the everyday "stuff", but also the emotional reaction to the situation you are in right now. As Dr. Dyer says, "when you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change."

Third, be aware of your actions and reactions during the tough times. It is a great insight into what's in your heart, and where you still can grow. My weakness is traffic. I am fully aware that traffic cannot affect me, but I do let it. I'm getting better, and I will overcome this. But I am fully aware when it is happening. In fact, most times I just look up, smile and say "Ok, I failed this test again, but keep it coming! I'll pass it someday!" Also, realize that it is absolutely 100% ok to fail a test! We are on the path, not at the end of it. Some lessons we learn quickly, some we repeat daily. But being aware that it is within you, and not the external circumstance will help the growth process. When you blame someone else for your reaction, ie: "That guy cut me off! What a *@#!@&!" Well, you can choose to be upset, or you can choose not to be. The judgment is in place because you are blaming him for something, and he is at fault. That means you are right, and he is wrong. That, of course, is ego. It also stems from the connection to "I want". "I want to drive without someone cutting me off and I want to get to my destination." And when something stands in your way, then out comes the dis-comfort. But when you are aware that it is within you, you relieve the situation of doing something "to" you, and your ego is in check. You are responsible for your actions and reactions. And even if you didn't handle it the best that you could, you are aware of it, and you can then continue to grow.

There are always going to be times in which we feel disconnected. It is worse for us when we have felt connected for a long time, because now we "feel" that something is wrong. As I mentioned in another blog, that "dis-comfort" is only telling us that we need to work on something within us. Using the above methods can help you tremendously to get through these times, and as I've found out again and again, there is usually a period of tremendous growth after a period of "disconnection", as long as you continue to do the work. Remember, it's a spiritual practice, which means we must continue to practice. The more you practice, the better you will be. And with time, you will overcome all obstacles.

The Beauty of Differences....

thegardensgate@gmail.com (The Garden) — Fri, 08 Oct 2010 17:35:00 +0000

I overheard two people talking about the baseball playoffs the other day at the grocery store. As they walked away, the guy bagging my groceries said bluntly: "Who cares." I said, "obviously they do", to which he replied "I don't like baseball". Now, I didn't get involved in the conversation, but it reminded me of an old saying which I rather like. It says "a fanatic is someone who is passionate about a subject in which you have no interest". I love people who are passionate about something. If you've ever seen someone passionate about sports, they'll say "Well, we won last night". It's not that he actually had anything to do with his team winning, but he feels he is a part of something, and in a way, he is. I've always looked at sports as an amazing ability to draw people from all walks of life towards a common goal. During that game, the fans don't care about race, creed, or color, they're all high fiving each other when their team does well, and they all feel the disappointment of defeat if they lose. And for a few hours that day, people that would normally never talk or socialize with each other shared smiles, highs, and lows. So, what is it about people that they can't do that in everyday life? If you can view people as having the same goal as you; ie wanting to be happy, wanting to be themselves, wanting to love and be loved, then you'll see that we are not really different from each other afterall.

Getting back to my interaction with the grocery bagger, what an amazing difference he could have felt inside himself by recognizing the passion in the individuals, and seeing the good that was happening. Instead, he only saw his dislike in himself, and felt the annoyance of that situation. We cannot judge someone for being interested in something that we are not. It is not "wrong" that they are interested in it, just as much as it is not "right" that we are not interested in it. But, if left unchecked, these attitudes flow over into how we interact with the world around us. Someone's clothing style, someone's sexual preference, someone's political affiliations. All these things can cause a great amount of discomfort when we put our "opinions" on it. It's always amazed me that when I tell someone I don't like tomatoes that there is never a reaction, but if I don't like something that someone else holds some sort of attachment to, they will argue with you like mad for not agreeing with them.

There is great beauty in differences of opinion. If used correctly, they can open up new thoughts and ideas that maybe you haven't seen or thought of before. Or, maybe not, but you have to be able to give the person the permission to be them. It only affects you if you let it affect you. Remember, you don't have to understand why the person does something, or believes in something, but we do have to accept it. Because all the arguing in the world is not going to make the situation any different. And when you start feeling that discomfort inside of you that questions "How on earth can they DO that?", realize that it's their stuff, not your stuff, and it's perfectly ok for them to do that. Then turn within and ask yourself what about you can't seem to handle that. You may be amazed at what you find.