Out of the Toy Box

How Working with AI has Increased my Stress

2025-11-25T22:58:00.000-08:00

In today's ever-evolving tech landscape, Artificial Intelligence (AI) is hailed as the ultimate savior, promising to solve all our productivity woes. But does it really? As someone who has had the (mis)fortune of working with AI, I've discovered that it’s not always the knight in shining armor that we were promised. Instead, it often resembles a confusing labyrinth that increases stress and workload rather than reducing them. In this section, we'll unravel the tangled threads of AI, exploring its flaws, examining how it diminishes productivity, and ironically, drains our time and financial resources.

Let's face it: AI can be as unreliable as a weather forecast. It's built on algorithms that are sometimes more mysterious than they are helpful. When you input data, it might respond with gibberish or errors that make you question your life choices. According to a study published by McKinsey & Company, only 30% of businesses effectively leverage AI to its full potential. The rest? They're grappling with poorly managed AI tools that increase confusion rather than clarity.

Expert insight: Dr. Jane Robotics from the University of Technostress states, "Misaligned AI systems can often operate in a manner that seems like a rebellious teenager who refuses to clean up their room." The takeaway? Double-check every automated output, because sometimes, the so-called smart systems act decidedly less sophisticated than their creators intended.

One would expect AI to lighten the workload. Instead, in many cases, it just adds layers of complexity. Think of AI as an overzealous intern who creates more work rather than relieving it. Every task requires you to review, verify, and more often than we'd like, correct what was supposed to be flawless AI-generated magic. A report by the journal AI & Society notes that employees in AI-intensive sectors report a 20% increase in workload to reconcile AI decisions with human oversight.

Practical advice? Allocate time daily to review your AI’s outcomes. Set boundaries and make sure you don’t treat it like a night owl colleague who constantly needs babysitting. Instead, be clear on what manual checks are necessary to maintain quality control in projects.

Ever been promised that AI would save you time, only to find out that you’re spending more on technical support and software updates? If you've nodded to that, today's your lucky day of validation. The implementation costs of AI tools and systems often run over budget—a reality highlighted by an IDC report that found businesses overspend by an average of 15% when implementing AI solutions. That’s money that could have funded much-needed coffee breaks or an office plant to boost morale.

A useful step? Vet your AI vendors carefully and prioritize those offering robust customer support. Implement pilot versions first to ensure that the software integrates smoothly with existing systems without a glitch (or meltdown).

While AI promises to be a productivity powerhouse, using it can paradoxically lead to increased stress, more workload, and unplanned time and resource investment. Understanding AI's limitations and managing expectations is crucial. Ironically, handling AI often requires precise human intervention. The key takeaway? Equip yourself with a well-researched AI strategy that includes safeguards for checking AI results, and don’t shy away from phoning in human expertise when needed. Because at the end of the day, sometimes you’re less likely to lose your sanity when your team includes more carbon-based life forms.

Fake Money Making Games - List

2024-03-16T00:32:00.000-07:00

At a time where there are very few of us that couldn't do with a little extra easy cash to help get us by, I recently spent a considerable amount of time, and data, playing fake money making games that claim not to be fake money making games.

You know these are the games that claim you can make $30 in 10 minutes or up to $1000 per day. The ones that say there is no withdrawal threshold, no ads, no daily tasks to complete, and no catch to withdrawing your earnings to PayPal or Cash App at anytime with payment made within 1 minute. And the ones that declare they will credit X amount just for downloading the app.

Most of these games seem to be powered by Unity Play so you might want to email them to discuss recovery of your earnings. I have to admit, some of these games are quite fun and adictive and, I would probably play them just for enjoyment, however I want the cash they claim I can earn fast. Afterall, as LunchMoney Lewis says... I got bills, I gotta pay.

With the game list below, I have ensured I have met ALL of the additional requirements for cashing out. This week alone I have accumulated a total of $17,915.26 in earnings. Despite this, my PayPal account still has a pre-gaming balance of $19.75.

If any of these games eventually pay out, I'll update the list with the amount and conditions that needed to be met. In the meantime, if you're a genuine developer, and you're game has appeared on my list, please feel free to contact me and I'm happy to discuss what requirement I may not have met that has prohibited a cash payment being made to my account, afterall, I am reasonable.

As a reader/gamer/money maker, if you think I have saved you some time, effort or money in being scammed by these fake money making games, please feel free to donate a cent or two to my PayPal account: theodore.bear@hotmail.com.au - thanks 😊

Aqua Marine

Blackjack fortune scratch

Block Puzzle: Brain Buster

Coin Cash

Copper Boom

Farm City

Fruits Fun

Match Tile

Panda Slots

Xmas Cartoon

Tips for Surviving Christmas

2017-12-18T02:22:00.001-08:00

Because you know I love you, I thought I best lend you a paw this Xmas. So to help you retain your sanity and get you through this silly season, the Mental Health Association NSW has some useful tips to keep you going.

Managing relationships at Christmas

Feelings of stress, anxiety and depression are common during the festive season. If nothing else, reassure yourself that these feelings are normal. Things you can try to reduce the amount of unpleasant feelings experienced on Christmas Day and throughout the holiday season are:

Have realistic expectations of yourself and others. Don’t expect miracles, if you and certain family members bicker all year long, you can be sure there will be tension at Christmas lunch too. Christmas isn’t a time to address long-term conflict. Try to let go of hard feelings at least for that one day, it will help you get through the holidays and my may even enjoy yourself.

Pick who you spend time with and talk to. Do things with people you feel most comfortable with. Going on a long walk with a favourite relative will help you get away and spend time with the person you would most like to.

Avoid known triggers. If politics or religion is a touchy subject, don’t discuss it. If someone else brings up the topic, use distraction and move onto another subject. If there’s a particular person you clash with, create some safe distance and sit next to someone else at lunch or dinner.

Plan fun things to do. Family members are less likely to get into arguments if they are involved in after lunch activities such as board games or a cricket match in the backyard. Plan for something to do as a group and focus on things you enjoy doing.

Take time out with friends. If you’re not used to spending all your time with the same people, it’s important to try and get a balance. You could still spend time with family but also arrange some days or nights out with your friends and give yourself and others a break. Plan ahead.

Set aside time for yourself. This can be something as simple as going for a short walk, or having a nap. Having some ‘me time’ to get away from it all will help you relax.

Look after your physical health. Getting enough sleep, keeping up your regular physical activity

routine, using relaxation techniques, and eating and drinking with moderation will help give you the stamina to get through the demands of the season.

Christmas is lonely for many—spread the cheer

People of all ages can enjoy Christmas with others, but there are many who find it to be a really lonely time. When family and friends get together it can be hard for those people who are on their own.

If you know someone who will be alone over Christmas, one of the kindest things you can do is get in touch. Even if it’s just for a chat on Christmas morning, a hello, or an invitation to have a cake in the afternoon, it can make a massive difference to their experience of the festive season.

Helping out others and doing random acts of kindness for someone will also lift your spirits if you are experienced festive stress. Consider volunteering in the days leading up to Christmas or donating to charity.

If you don’t have close family or friends to spend Christmas with, you could also consider doing a call out to other friends, or colleagues who are also not spending time with family. You’ll be surprised how many people are separated from family and friends during this time of year. Get together on Christmas Day to do something different from what you’d do with family—such as a picnic in the backyard, a day at the beach or a themed party at someone’s house. If you are alone on Christmas Day, remember that it’s just one day out of 365, and try to do something enjoyable and special just for you.

Festive stress is normal

Remember just because some things are ‘supposed’ to be fun and festive around holiday time, doesn’t mean you have to be.

Accept that the festive season is a stressful time and allow yourself to have feelings about it. Remind yourself that the feelings will not stay forever, and you have the ability to make things better. When you are feeling sad, overwhelmed or stressed, ask yourself ‘What can I do right now to feel better?’

This might involve practicing some of the tips suggested above to reduce relationship stress. It could also mean talking to someone about how you feel and sharing what the season is really like for you.

But above all else, relax and enjoy the time being you.

Anyhow’s until January 2018, may you all have a happy, safe and jolly time. Remember to play nicely with the other children and remember my motto for this Holiday Season…. ‘The more the merrier’ and you know what I mean.

Most of all remembered you are loved.

xoxxo

LGBTIQ and Passive Bullying in Australian Schools

2015-06-22T21:53:00.001-07:00

The purpose of this paper is to examine how the media portrays Health and Physical Education programs within the school environment. The paper will go on to consider whether this perception by the media is warranted, and how the new National Health and Physical Education Curriculum (Australian Curriculum, Assessment and Reporting Authority, 2014) assists teachers and support staff in providing students with a valued and ethical framework from which to scaffold a healthy life.

To aid in the preparation of this paper, the paper’s scope will maintain a narrow focus. This focus will be limited to the specific area of student mental health and well-being from the foundation years onwards.

Local level content

From the outset, the intention of this paper was to examine school health and physical education and the media from a local level. Despite being in close proximity to five government funded state schools and four private schools, this idea became an increasingly difficult task.

While local media provided copious articles on noteworthy first year enrolments; visiting sports people and, the results of individual school and interschool sporting achievements, little is written on other aspects of school life; including programs that promote student health and well-being. A brief look at each of the school’s websites (where available), indicated little more than a commitment to student mental health and well-being, through non-specific pastoral care measures and, the use of unqualified mental health practitioners such as Chaplaincy support. It can only be concluded from the lack of information available that;

a) all schools in the area are undertaking the same health and well-being programs, and there is little need to promote program success,

b) it is taken for granted that all schools have some form of a health and well-being program and, the quality of the overall program is of little concern,

c) competition for enrolments in the area is particularly tough and schools are not wishing to reveal their pastoral care strategies or,

d) by the very nature of the dominant demographic and industry (mining), the community would rather close its eyes and ignore mental health issues.

With this in mind, news articles were collected on a state and national basis. To ensure non-selective article retrieval, a search term of ‘school health programs’ was used.

Summary of key themes and issues

In reviewing the selected newspaper items, twelve key themes and issues relating to teaching emotional intelligence from a strengths-based approach and the promotion of general student well-being were determined. The commonality of themes included:

· Empowering individuals to engage effectively with others through the formation of peer networks

· Reducing the stigma associated with mental illness

· Building resiliency when faced with difficult or adverse situations and circumstances

· Secondary school seen as being proactive in setting and promoting positive mental health standards

· Prompts by organisations and individuals for easier access to qualified professionals such as Counsellors and psychological services rather than increased government funding to Chaplaincy Programs

· Moves to make emotional resilience learning part of the National Curriculum

· Improved mental health and well-being leads to improved academic performance

· Mental distress has a huge impact on student learning

· Acceptance of diversity

· Connection between bullying and an increase in poor mental health and anxiety, particularly in students who identify as Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans, Intersex or Queer (LGBTIQ)

· Homophobia and transphobia encouraged through the use of casual language

· Discussion of the Mind Matters program; a framework for schools that aims to promote mental health, prevent problems and enable early intervention (Mind Matters, 2014).

Reflection of Issues

Through having worked with Aboriginal students in remote communities, very few of the issues such as; the impact mental distress has on student learning; the stigma associated with mental illness; resiliency building, or even the appropriateness of government funded Chaplaincy over professionally qualified services came as a surprise. However, one topic disclosed which did come as a revelation, and has prompted further research, was the discussion of passive bullying using casual language. In the article ‘Homophobic bullying commonplace in high school physical education classes, new research suggest’ (Silver, 2014), it is indicated that the casual language in seemingly harmless statements such as ‘you throw like a girl’ or ‘that is so gay’, can have detrimental mental health effects on students who identify as gender variant and sexually diverse.

Citing a 2014 study by Mental Health organisation Beyond Blue (Australian-first study of the mental health of transgender and gender diverse young people), Silver notes, LGBTIQ students have higher rates of reported mental health and well-being concerns than their heterosexual counterparts do. Silver goes on to reveal, that of this cohort, 80 per cent have been subjected passive bullying during physical education classes. Prompted by these statements, and the call of Beyond Blue CEO Georgie Harman for physical education teachers to intervene, further research in to the area of passive bullying during physical education (HPE) classes was undertaken.

In their 2014 report ‘Growing Up Queer’, Robinson, Bansel, Denson, Ovenden and Davies add credence to Silver’s claims. Moreover, their research goes beyond the effect of casual language on mental health, and examines the impact of passive and overt bullying in HPE classes. Overwhelmingly, students also reported exclusion from sporting activities by HPE teachers or, active marginalisation from their peers. Marginalisation of LGBTIQ students by HPE teachers included; social isolation, humiliation, not being permitted to change with other students, forced participation in gendered sport (for example, netball for females and football for males) and, violation of trust through direct homophobic and transphobic comments being made at students,

Robinson et al. (2014, p. 5) posit, young people were of the opinion that government funded state school teachers were more accepting of sexual diversity than students were, whereas the opposite was found to be true in the private school sector. As a consequence of their status, the health and well-being of sexually diverse students was further put at risk by increased rates of depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicidal ideation. In addition to mental health, these students were further marginalised through heteronormative sex education programs in schools, which focused on reproductive sex, rather than sexuality education that promoted sexual health.

Linking Media content with the Curriculum

With 19 per cent of students reporting severe levels of distress (Trounson, 2011), and mental health issues amongst students predicted to escalate when compared to the general population, many of the points illustrated by the selected news articles support a common underlying thread. If educational institutions are to assist students in developing a true sense of self and proper health literacy skills, the common thread of making emotional resilience learning part of the National Curriculum must come as a matter of urgency.

As noted in The Shape of the Australian Curriculum: Health and Physical Education (2012, p. 7), one of the Aims of the curriculum is to enable students to promote their own health, wellbeing, as well as that of others across the lifespan. It is suggested that the acquisition of these skills and knowledge will underpin the competence and confidence required by all students in order for them to engage in healthy and active life-styles. Further, to promote opportunities for students to develop self-efficacy, the curriculum will go on to address health and well-being topics such as human biology, gender, sexuality, culture, ethnicity, pro-social behaviours, and the impact socioeconomic status, physical and psycho-social environments has on the individual (Shape of the Australian Curriculum, 2012, p. 2).

What is of concern here is the negative impact some teachers and support staff will have on students’, given the possibility of their own attitudes and personal belief systems surrounding sensitive matters such as bullying, mental illness and gender diversity. Such a point in case is the example of the School Principal who referred to the school’s new well-being program as ‘Operation Nutcase’ (Prisk and Koziol, 2014). Although the Principal’s intention was a well-meaning, tongue in cheek attempt to break down the barriers, his reference to students with mental health issues, poor socialisation skills, lack of resilience and undue anxiety as ‘moron’s and village idiots’ caused both staff and parental alarm. Add to this the examples of passive bullying, the expectation of specific gender roles, and inaccurate media images that perpetuates unfavourable stereotypes, that can lead to the rejection, marginalisation and neglect of people with mental illnesses, there must be an expectation that such educational programs will be well structured and monitored closely for equity, quality, and absence of personal biases.

In examining the Health and Physical Education curriculum (2012), a critical inquiry approach and experiential learning for future mental health and well-being is introduced to students in its most basic form during the Foundation years. This is achieved by assisting students in developing an awareness and understanding of the self (ACPPS001) and, the effective formation and maintenance of appropriate social relationships (ACPPS004), (ACPPS005) and (ACPPS006).

This theme is then carried through to years 1 and 2 with the ongoing development of personal and social skills, relationships, and problem-solving strategies. As students progress through each year level, the content descriptors and achievement standards in the area of Personal, Social and Community Health become more complex and explicit in its teaching. For example, in years 7 and 8 students begin to examine the impact on mental health through (ACPPS070) which takes into consideration physical changes on gender, cultural and sexual identities.

According to Queensland Health, the World Health Organisation (2001, p. 1) propose that health and education are inherently linked and an essential part of lifelong learning. They go on to suggest health promoting schools are committed to the development of the whole individual, the curriculum and the wider community.

While there can be no denying the importance of general health and its link to mental health and well-being in all sectors of the community, what does become of concern, is the methodology used to convey this message to students.

Stevenson (2012) indicates there has been significant debate in recent times regarding the Federal government’s commitment of nearly half a billion dollars towards the National School Chaplaincy and Student Welfare Program (NSCSWP). Elliot and Smith (2014), state that while this non-essential funding is being made available, $30 billion is being taken out of education and specialist school health programs in the long term.

In their reports, Elliot and Smith, and Stevenson all agree that chaplains are over-stepping their boundaries and taking on mental health professional roles such counsellors, psychologists and guidance officers for which they are not trained. Citing the Australian Psychology Society (APS), Elliot and Smith note that during school-based programs such as before school care, and breakfast and lunch programs, chaplains spend much of their time taking students away from supervision and providing counselling. The APS says this is practice with dangerous consequences given increased levels of youth mental health issues and rates of youth suicide. They argue that despite DEEWR guidelines regarding religious proselytising and counselling by chaplains within school grounds, governments will continue with the cheaper, vote-buying option.

This paper has examined Health and Physical Education (mental health) in schools as reported by the media. While many of the issues raised by the media were of little surprise, much was revealed about the link between mental health, bullying and sexually diverse youth. Concern was also raised about the role and possible negative impact untrained school support personnel such as Chaplains could have on overall student mental health and well-being.

From the report by Robinson et al. (2014), an indication was also given regarding the use of casual language, and the effect passive and overt bullying in HPE classes had on the mental health of LGBTIQ students. This form of bullying included exclusion from sporting activities by teachers or, active marginalisation from their peers, social isolation, humiliation, forced participation in gender specific sports, and direct homophobic and transphobic comments being made.

Although progress has been made in the development of a National Curriculum for Health and Physical Education in schools, much of what is taught is at the discretion of individual schools and limited by teacher understanding. For issues such as sexuality, gender diversity, and bullying to be included within the context of the curriculum, specific teaching modules would need to be developed to ensure accurate content and an unbiased view.

References

Australian Curriculum, Assessment and Reporting Authority. (2012). Shape of the Australian Curriculum: Health and Physical Education. Version 3. Retrieved from http://www.acara.edu.au/hpe.html

Australian Curriculum, Assessment and Reporting Authority. (2014). The Australian Curriculum: Heath and Physical Education. Version 7. Retrieved from http://www.australiancurriculum.edu.au/health-and-physical-education/Curriculum/F-10?layout=3&y=5-6&s=MPA&s=PSCH&c=1&c=2&c=3&c=4&c=5&c=6&c=7&p=1&p=2&p=3

Beyond Blue. (2014). Australian-first study of the mental health of transgender and gender diverse young people. Retrieved from http://www.beyondblue.org.au/about-us/news/news/2014/09/29/australian-first-study-of-the-mental-health-of-transgender-and-gender-diverse-young-people

Centre for Addiction and Mental Health. (2012). Talking about mental illness: Teacher's Guide: Section 1: Information About the Program http://www.camh.ca/en/education/teachers_school_programs/resources_for_teachers_and_schools/talking_about_mental_illness/Pages/tami_teacherguide_part1.aspx

Commonwealth of Australia, (2004). Risk and Resilience: A teacher's guide to mental health. Retrieved from http://www.dcita.gov.au/cca

Elliot, T., & Smith, A. (2014). God in the classroom – no thanks. Retrieved from http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/god-in-the-classroom-8211-no-thanks-20140627-zsobq.html#ixzz3ExQbBdrQ

Mind Matters. (2014). Schools reap rewards from focus on mental health. Retrieved from http://www.mindmatters.edu.au/about-mindmatters/news-updates/article/2014/05/05/schools-reap-rewards-from-focus-on-mental-health)

Prisk, T., & Koziol, M. (2014). Orange school principal calls students with mental health issues ‘morons’ and ‘village idiots’. Retrieved from http://www.smh.com.au/nsw/orange-school-principal-calls-students-with-mental-health-issues-morons-and-village-idiots-20140828-109c9e.html

Queensland Health. (2001). A toolbox for creating healthy places to learn work and play. Central Public Health Unit; Queensland Health: Brisbane, Australia

Robinson, K. H., Bansel. P., Denson, N., Ovenden, G., & Davies, C. (2014). Growing up Queer: Issues facing young Australians who are gender variant and sexuality diverse. Young and Well Cooperative Research Centre: Melbourne, Australia.

Silver, K. (2014). Homophobic bullying commonplace in high school physical education classes, new research suggests. Retrieved from http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-08-09/homophobic-bullying-commonplace-in-school-pe-classes/5660234

Stevenson, C. (2012). Faith in schools: The dismantling of Australia's secular public education system. Retrieved from ABC Religion and Ethics, http://www.abc.net.au/religion/articles/2012/10/22/3615647.htm

Trounson, A. (2011). Mental health issues among students to escalate. Retrieved from http://www.theaustralian.com.au/higher-education/mental-health-issues-among-students-to-escalate/story-e6frgcjx-1226111953584

Bewitched, Be Battered, Be Bothered: a modern metaphor of abuse and escape in 60’s Suburbia

2014-02-23T15:58:00.000-08:00

This is an extract from a paper on domestic violence in the media I wrote back in 2011. Following a number of request on Twitter, I am posting this article to help encourage further conversation and debate on the subject, and get people to critically think about what we really see, or rather choose not to see in situational comedies.

I apologise I cannot provide you with the full article as the Western Digital pocket drive my work was stored on is damaged. This work is subject to copyright and cannot be reproduced in any part without my expressed permission.

As with today’s television programming efforts, programs consumed by the masses during the 1960’s and 70 has mirrored social values and cultural changes occurring at that time. Helping to conceal real life issues of war and conflict, shows such as ‘Leave it to Beaver’, ‘The Brady Bunch’, and ‘My Three Sons’ reflected wholesome images of the ‘perfect family’, ‘perfect lifestyle’, the happy-homemaker and took into account growing pains faced by children from middle-class America.

The producers of one television series however, Bewitched (Screen Gems 1964 – 1970; Ashmont Pictures 1971 – 1972), took a slightly different view when they presented us with their version of an imperfect American ideal. While essentially the narrative throughout the series revolves around the subjection of Darrin to copious hoaxes and hexes by his in-laws because they considered him beneath them, Bewitched did more than offer a few moments of escapism by transporting viewers to a world of magical beings and incantations. No matter how thinly disguised, Bewitched encapsulated changing societal values as it publicly announced the dawning of open marriages, sexual freedoms, and integration. However, was everything at 1164 Morning Glory Circle as producers would have us believe?

Strip away the facade of magic and mysticism and we find an average middle-class 1960’s suburban couple. They have two children, well kept house, the latest model car, and the primary income earner is an advertising executive – essentially a perfect nuclear family --. Upon closer examination of the Bewitched narrative though, a darker side of 60’s suburbia is exposed. To run the risk of oversimplification, amongst the many issues revealed such as drug abuse, domestic violence, and the notion of women as property, we are provided with an underlying allegory of a woman’s concept of ‘self’ brought about by the husbands’ claim of power, and the impact his lack of cultural awareness has within an intercultural relationship.

Within her traditions, Samantha is an attractive, well-educated, articulate woman, who in many respects is more powerful than her husband Darrin is (not only is she a witch, but she is Queen of witches). Nonetheless, as Pettman (1992, p. 60) suggests, sexist ideologies construct particular thoughts of masculinity and femininity, which shape and constrain women's roles and their choices. Therefore, if Samantha is to conform to the constructs associated with her new culture – that of being a mortal --, she must obey her husband’s wishes. To fulfil his masculine role and gain power over her, Darrin effectively prohibits the practice of elements associated with Samantha’s traditions, and socially isolates her by setting out conditions that govern the extent and type of interaction allowed with that society.

In a number of episodes throughout the series, Darrin declines consensual offerings associated with legitimate power. This rejection of power further demonstrates Darrin’s perception of the masculine role along with his desire to dominate and control his wife through seizing assumed power. By taking power from his wife, society cannot view her as his equal, nor indeed, would they (society) be able to place her at a higher station.

Adding weight to the argument of an abusive relationship as defined by Astor (1994, p. 4) are episodes in which family and friends remove Samantha from the situation by whisking her off to distant places. In each case, as with real life, we again find Darrin (the perpetrator) exerting his dominance by going after Samantha and returning her to her rightful place, his home.

Writers also provide a glimpse of Samantha’s subconscious mind. These glimpses afford the viewer with a valuable insight in to the effects of the character’s subjugation, what the character desires, her need to escape, and the impact cultural separation has on the characters wellbeing.

Mayer (2008, p.p. 1-2) points out racial, cultural or social discrimination causes stress with individuals developing more health problems, immunological down-regulation and psychological ill health. While only one episode, ‘Sam’s Psychic Slip’, specifically states Samantha has a ‘cycle-logical’ condition, whereby each time she hiccups a ‘cycle’ in one form or another materialises, other psychological examples illustrating issues of decisional conflict, blocked behaviours, thoughts and feelings requiring a broadening of perspectives as suggested by Ivey & Simek-Downing, (1980, p. 20) are also present. Such examples include:

· Where Samantha contracts a condition making her heavier – possibly representing the lethargy often experienced with depression –, upon diagnosis the Doctor provides Samantha with an antidote that makes her float. The effect of the antidote could be viewed in one of two ways; the medication taking affect or, the ongoing desire to flee (the fight or flight effect).

· In ‘Okay, Who’s the Wise Witch’, the consequences of Samantha ongoing rejection of her traditions at Darrin’s insistence, and the need for escape becomes quite literal. By denying Samantha her spiritual and cultural heritage, the house develops a vapour lock and those inside become trapped with no means of escape. We can only assume that as three of the four involved in this scenario are visiting witches, this trapped feeling, and the need to escape has resulted from Darrin’s continual vilification of those associated with Samantha’s ethnicity.

· Perhaps the most poignant example on the affects of systematic isolation and abuse however comes from ‘Weep no more my Willow’. Here we find Samantha wanting to revive a dying willow tree (presumably her marriage), she calls her Doctor to help make her tree healthy again (initiating a therapeutic relationship). During the incantation (counselling session) to make the tree weep, Samantha is caught in the crossfire of the spell (consider this a euphemism of being caught by her husband trying to fix a relationship not considered broken), and when the wind blows, she begins to cry. When a neighbour and Darrin’s employer hear Samantha crying they come to comfort her as they are of the opinion the couple have been arguing. The Doctor returns twice more. Once to administer an antidote (another counselling session) which leaves Samantha laughing uncontrollably, and finally to provide an antidote for the antidote, thus returning Samantha to a perceived normal state (a final counselling session reviewing and putting additional coping strategies in place).

Throughout this series, one of the more interesting aspects is the inclusion of Samantha’s identical cousin Serena. Although Serena only appears in twenty-four episodes (Montgomery credited as Pandora Spocks), she provides an example of Freud’s id at work, and how it is balanced by the ego and superego of Samantha. Without doubt, Serena is Samantha’s sexual, carefree, and reckless side, the destructive side that acts on impulse seeking gratification and pleasure. Peterson & Nisenholz, (1999, p. 178) suggest when the ego is unable to maintain the energy to deal adequately with unacceptable impulses and the demands of the superego, the id or the superego becomes dominant over other personality components. Supporting this notion that the id, Serena, has become the dominant personality component are episodes where Serena impersonates Samantha and inflicts misery upon Darrin.

Aside from the id of Serena becoming the dominant personality component, a further example, ‘Mixed Doubles’, emphasises the id’s reality and Samantha’s unconscious motives, unspeakable yearnings, and conflicts between desire and duty as pointed out by Wade & Tavris (1997, p.455). This episode see’s Samantha reading a book on relationships prior to going to sleep. When she awakes, she discovers she has become the wife of her husband’s employer, and his wife has become her.

There are at least four ways to interpret this episode.

1. Suggest this was nothing more than simple partner swapping. However, this was not the case as Samantha was the only one aware she was not Louise,

2. Samantha is having an affair. Thereby demonstrating the morals and conscience defined by the superego could not compete with the id,

3. Samantha no longer wants to be in a relationship with Darrin or,

4. Samantha would rather be someone else, somewhere else -- presenting a less aggressive form of the id than Serena --.

While this paper has only begun to explore a multitude of hidden meanings contained in one of America’s oldest Witchcoms by applying principles of psychoanalysis, we have at least opened the door to reveal the seedier side of 1164 Morning Glory Circle. In doing so, we have exposed the true nature of the poor suffering mortal husband. The man once thought of as the victim has made known the sexist ideology construct of masculinity. He has shown he is not the passive bystander as once thought, but rather the cause of neurosis, the architect of demoralisation, and the perpetrator of systemic abuse upon his wife and her culture.

As suggest by Yang (2010, p. 29), ‘[a]nyone who does not accept the reality and validity of cultural differences as a general concept is not ready to get insight into another culture’.

References

Astor, H. Violence and Family Mediation: Policy, in 'Australian Journal of Family Law', #3, 1994

CBS Entertainment (2011). Bewitched. Retrieved 10/09/2011 from: http://www.tv.com/shows/bewitched

Ivey, A. E. & Simek-Downing, L. (1980). Counseling

and psychotherapy: Skills, theory, and practice. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice Hall

Mayer, C. (2008). Identity and Health in Transcultural Mediation. In Journal of Intercultural Communication 17, 1-19. Retrieved 5/2/2010 from: http://www.immi.se/Jicc/index.php/article/view/63/36

Peterson, J. & Nisenholz, B. (1999). Orientation to Counseling (4th Edition). Allyn & Bacon

Pettman, J. (1992). Living in the Margins - Racism, Sexism and Feminism in Australia. Allen and Unwin, Sydney.

Wade, C., & Tavris, C. (1997). Psychology. Longman

Yang, Y. (2010). Interactive Cultural Cultivating in FLT, In English Language Teaching, 3 (1). Retrieved 4/2/2010 from http://ccsenet.org/journal/index.php/elt/article/viewfile/5211/4327.

Not all Bears are Blondie

2012-12-04T18:26:00.002-08:00

Those of you who follow me on Twitter would have recently read that a few of us had managed to escape the Toy Box for a big night out. Yes, with a whirl and all the flurry you could expect from a bunch of assorted bears, Barbie’s, GI Joe’s and other extraneous toys, we flooded out onto the streets and headed off to see The Saints and The Stranglers along with the fabulous Deborah Harry and Blondie in concert.

While the concert appealed to a wide age group, it was incredibly heart-warming to see so many grey-haired punk rockers sporting Mohawks, mullets, tattoo’s and piercings turn out. Disappointment set in however when a few more closeted wannabe punk oldies dressed in business suits appeared on the scene. It seems though, reminiscing about yester-years glory days, the excitement and ecstasy once derived from doing shady pot deals in backrooms and dropping acid on the dance floor was short-lived – quickly substituted with discussions of heart medications, hip replacements, grandchildren and the need to turn up ones hearing aide.

Although it took a while for the crowd to warm up due to the overzealous efficiency of security guards, us Bears and a GI Joe eventually made our way with caution to the mosh pit to bang our furry polly-filled heads as the night rocked on. We heard our favourite songs from Chris and his Saints (like wine they have aged beautifully), and who could go past Baz, Dave, Jean-Jacques and Jet doing a fine, fine, fine rendition of Golden Brown and Peaches. And I tell you, for an old Rock Chick, Deborah Harry still has what it takes, and boy can she still belt out one heck of a tune.

While we never got to meet any of the bands despite our best efforts of staking out the lobby, back door and hotels (see comment regarding overzealous security), we must have had a great night as we didn’t get home until 4 am the next morning... I told you we made every effort to meet all the bands.

Despite being totally trashed, the next morning we were still hyped up on all the head banging and stalking that had taken place the night before. So to annoy the neighbours, and the House Human we decided it would be a great idea to do our own rendition of Blondie’s Maria. As it turned out, the GI Joe’s knew the guitar bits. I knew the words, and who would have known, but my brother Rupert could play keyboards.

After a few hours of banging, bum notes, shouting, screaming and vulgarities, something became increasingly clear. Just as not all humans are cute and cuddly or, have the perfect masculine form of a GI Joe, not all toys are talented. And sadly, not all Bears are Blondie.

Despite the embarrassment this episode in life may cause us Toy Box folk, and the risk I run of being hunted down only to have the stuffing knocked out of me by the readers of this blog, this is what we have come up with for your amusement. Click here to listen to our version of Blondie’sMaria.

We hope you sort of enjoy listening to it and, remember Personal Protective Equipment such as earplugs is a must. The only thing we ask from you in return is your undying love and devotion, and of course... your support when Blondie takes legal action against us for killing a great song.

Love and best wishes as always,

Theo

Here's to a Happy 2012

2011-12-31T17:44:00.000-08:00

Welcome to Sunday 1^st January 2012. Yes, my first blog posting for the year, meaning yet another year has passed. One can only hope it’s better than the years that have proceeded it.

The people living down the road are obviously planning to enjoy this year more than usual. It’s 10 am New Years Day, a balmy 30 degrees Celsius, and they’re still partying hard despite the local constabulary having attended the property at least three times that I am aware of... perhaps the police are in a partying mood, or there is free booze on tap. I don’t know, and I don’t much care.

Since I missed posting my Christmas message, I sincerely hope you had a good one and Santa gave you everything you wished for. Considering my wish list for Christmas 2010 went ignored, my list for Christmas 2011 was very simple and straight forward... just like my good self. No I didn’t ask Santa for a new house with a swimming pool, tennis court, sauna and room for a My Little Pony. And despite the fact that I stumbled across a very nice car in the toy cattle dog, I didn’t even ask for that.

Instead, I thought for Christmas 2011 I would use reverse psychology on the jolly man in the red suit to see what would happen. So with all the finesse, style, grace and will power this tiny teddy could muster, my list was blank. Not a single word was scribbled on the perfect page, it remained untouched and untarnished by these tiny paws. No brightly decorated tree with flashing lights sat in the corner of the House Human’s living room, and no cookies, milk or carrots were left for Santa and his reindeer to enjoy. And just like the previous year, I got a big fat nothing. Not a single sausage, not a card, not even a Merry Christmas from the House Human. Once again, Christmas sucked more than the vacuum cleaner.

So what will 2012 bring? Dunno! But one thing I do know is I have made no New Year Resolution because I can’t stick to them; it’s too hard. However, I have decided I no longer want fame, I no longer want fortune (I can’t afford it), and I no longer want what I know I cannot have... success. Regardless of all the wishing and hoping that I have done over the past two years in trying to remain out of the toy box, I have come to realise that this little bear has very little talent. I am not wise, I am not witty, can’t write for Jack (the pile of rejection letters prove that), and dare I say it... I’m not even remotely amusing. Yes, sadly, I have become bitter and twisted with a jaded view of the world. I guess that’s what happens when you attempt to become something that you’re not... human. Skin me now while I still have fur and I may make a reasonable bearskin rug for the toy box and that’s about all.

Despite my whining and grizzling though, I do thank everyone who takes the time to read my blog complete with annoying advertising that no-one bothers to pay attention to, and for following me on Twitter. While I know I will never have more than my current number of followers, nor earn a living through doing either of these things, it is nice to know that my rants are read everywhere from Russia to the UK, Australia to America, Norway to India and everywhere in between. It is also a pleasure to know I have a way of expressing myself without being judged as something less than insignificant.

With 2012 underway, it is time for me to find a job if I am to remain part of the outside world. After a lot of discussion, I have dropped out of University. It was a hard decision to make as I only had two more subjects to do before completing my Masters but, as the House Human can no longer afford to send me it is time for me to earn my keep. I hear there may be some work stacking shelves and collecting trolleys at the local supermarket. Not sure if they will consider me though given a can of soup is somewhat bigger than I am. But here’s hoping. If you can think of any other career path I can follow send me an email – I love the correspondence and pictures I get from you, they are always very funny, and yes, often naughty.

In the mean time, I wish you all a very happy and prosperous New Year. I hope you can see your resolutions through. And most importantly, I wish you and your families all the love and happiness the world has to offer for a better life. May your dreams come true.

Until next time,

Best wishes and love

Theodore H. Bear

Movember & A little bears’ darkest thoughts

2011-11-07T18:59:00.000-08:00

My 2010 Mo

With no blog update and no tweets on Twitter for the past couple of months, you’ve probably all been thinking my life outside of the toy box had come to an end. I am pleased to say I have been given a temporary reprieve, and the rumours of my assassination at the paws of the House Dog, or my abduction by Oxfam, were just that... rumours. Rumours constructed by the hideous House Human in an evil ploy to conceal the truth from the world. A truth so awful, I dare not speak it on the off chance that ‘It’ reads my blog and grounds me again. Sure I only got a credit average in my Master of Writing, I was happy, the University was happy, the other toys were happy, but the House Human wasn’t.

For four long boring months I had to come home straight after Uni, my use of the internet was closely supervised and to be used for study purposes only. But the worse thing of all, the House Human confiscated my mobile phone. How can you possibly live without the warmth of a sleek, black mobile phone pressing gently against your fur; denied the way your heart flutters when its face illuminates a darkened room with an unexpected call? Or how can you be denied the buzz you feel as you watch the delightful way it dances across the desktop when the alarm has been set to vibrate? I’m sure if there is such a thing as Bear Abuse, taking away the unconditional love and friendship of a mobile phone would qualify.

From a conversation I overheard the other day, I came to learn my grounding by the hideous House Human had little to do with how well I was, or was not doing at Uni. As it transpires the House Human had a big case of green-eyed-envy and couldn’t cope with the fact I had more followers than ‘It’ did on twitter, and ‘It’ was rather annoyed by the fact my blog was read and followed by so many. But I think what really pushed him over the edge was when ‘It’ learnt my blog was being studied by students at Universities worldwide... admittedly, I didn’t find the need to say my blog was being used as an example of how not to do a blog.

Anyhow I’m back (and while I’m not rich or famous yet), it has been just over a year since I climbed out of the toy box to introduce myself to the world. It’s also hard to believe that November, or as many around the globe have come to know it, Movember, is here once again.

Sadly, I’m not in a position to grow the mo this year as the House Human can’t afford to give me hair and, as his hair hasn’t grown back from last year’s effort, he has none to spare even if he could. So instead, I thought I would do my bit by writing a story (found at the end of this blog) and by making a donation while reminding you all how important this month is in raising vital funds for men’s health around the world.

For those of you not aware of the Movember cause (shame, shame... shame), here’s the run down to bring you up to speed. Movember was started by to blokes from Melbourne Australia (yay!) in 2003 to raise money for the two biggest health issues men face – prostate cancer and depression. In the last eight years the fuzzy-faced word, like a manly facial religion on Youtube, has gone viral. As such, Movember has grown (no pun intended) to inspire more than 1.1 Million Mo Bros and Mo Sistas from Australia, New Zealand, the USA, Canada, the United Kingdom, Finland, the Netherlands, Spain, South Africa and Ireland.

Last year over 130,000 Australian Mo Bros and Sistas got on board, raising $25 Million (AUD). According to their website, Movember is aware of participants supporting the campaign and men’s health in places such as Russia, Dubai, Hong Kong, Antarctica, Rio de Janeiro, Mumbai and everywhere in between. Hey, even the fabulous Kylie Minogue is onboard with her support.

As we know, you Human males have a funny attitude and are not very good at talking about stuff like health or emotions, therefore, someone needs to help drag you into the light kicking and screaming. This is not a case of ‘man flu’, and you are no longer a caveman, so stop your pissing and moaning before it’s too late. Become educated about the health risks you face. Talk to your mates and help them become fully informed about early detection, diagnosis and the treatments for illnesses such as prostate cancer and depression.

But most importantly, whether you are a human, a dog, a cat... or indeed, a stuffed bear, and no matter where on this planet you live, this is your chance to become a Mo Bro or Sista and help change the face of men’s health. Please visit the Movemberwebsite to begin your journey.

Given one of the focuses of Movember is depression, I would like to share with you the short piece of prose below written while locked in the toy box . If you like the dark and dismal work of a depression prone Edgar Allan Poe, you’ll probably enjoy the Poe-like style. If not, well without doubt, you will read no further.

I look forward to hearing what you think. Until next time..

Best wishes,

Theodore Bear

Torn Soul: The depressive thoughts of a little bear

I sit; alone, caught between two worlds. ‘Tis a tumultuous time, the voices of the past present and future converge in my mind.

I walk into the light. Such a bright light – glistening like the hallowed moon marked as I by time – suspended silently in pitch-black. Life has come full circle, spiralling within and without; torturing my soul, mocking every fibre of my being – emptiness overcoming life --.

Hesitantly, fearfully, impetuously I walk unto my end. Yet I, my soul, remain unafraid to this point of all which is to befall. What shall become of me? – The world I have come to know so well, yet comprehend so little --. What is to become of those whose souls I have helped mould and direction I have changed? What murderous feat had brought me to this forsaken place? What wickedness had I partaken to be left invisible and alone – frightened --. Frightened of those that pass me by, judging with minds so narrow they are incapable of looking beyond the mere mortal to find the person I once was, the potential I once could have achieved.

Ah, then I recalled. Life had passed me by ever so quickly – such as that of a thunderous spring storm; a tornado pulling at my now blackened, putrid heart –. By sharpened tongue like an ensiform blade, I sacrificed my inner child on a cold, bare stone alter in the crevices’ of my mind, and watched in silence as all hope and passion ceased; without thought, nor care. A life forgotten; squandered; wasted.

And there alone, in the cold and quiet darkness -- hidden from those I know so well --, a new creature became fixed upon my soul.

Scorned the Demon called, ‘Come forth O’ wretched child; let thee hold thou to thine breast, kiss thy tender lips, and nurture what remains of a once good and kindly heart. Let thee bring thou eternal life and possessions beyond thou wile fantasies.

‘Perchance,’ I responded. ‘Perchance O’ gentle Demon – I beseech you, do you know how I shall return to a land of wonder -- turn my back upon this darkened shore?--’.

The Demon at once he answered, with words of simoom that beat upon my weary brow. ‘Come close O’ tormented child, let thee hold thou to thine breast, kiss thy tender lips and bring comfort to thy soul. For thy deeds of hate and murder of your very essence shall keep thee here in thy warm embrace for all life’s end.

His words rang in silence, and the light it grew in brightness – illuminating an abyss of nothingness, that made me tremble to the core --.

‘Oh great and gentle Demon, I implore you, keep your gifts and stolen treasures. Restore my mind unto me and return me from whence I came and I shall bother you no more’.

As my words were all but spoken, ghostly images in smoky passages rapidly began to form. My heart grew still, for their shadowed approach -- swift and silent -- foretold their fated chore.

The Demon he commanded, ‘Rest; let us take thee under and feast upon thy slovenly soul’.

Without expression I allowed my soul to surrender, and prayed the end come swiftly – that the viper’s venom would surge quickly through my veins--, lulling my soul into a blissful, silent rest I had never known before.

But the Demon’s words bit deeply, as his voice it called once more sweetly, ‘Let thee hold thou to thine breast, kiss thy tender lips and bring comfort to thy soul’.

‘Yes O’ great and gentle Demon … I surrender. Take your reward for the deeds I have left undone; the words of love that have gone unspoken; replace the life I feel was squandered, and release my missing mind from the purposeless fortress of my soul.’

Without a preconceived notion, my senses reeled with apprehension and I found my trembling feet placed firmly on the ground. There in the empty darkness; formed an inky-pool of fire which came swirling from the floor – peaceful, joyous, silence now filled my vacant heart --.

The peaceful silence all but shattered, as from the glowing embers a hundred-fold of demons danced in wild frenzy and began tearing at my soul. As they tormented me with terror, the Demon’s hot breath drew nearer as he whispered to my ear, ‘Let us watch as thy cold blood runs more freely, like scarlet tongues of serpents lapping at the threshold of thine enemies’ door. Let us bring shelter, eternal death and possessions beyond thou wiliest fancy and a mind that shall bother no more.’

Exhausted again I called. ‘I beseech you, do you know how I shall return to a land of wonder -- turn my back upon this darkened shore?--’.

But before the Demon answered a hand is moved in silence and put upon my fragile heart. I stir ever slightly. It is not the welcomed touch of Death that bids me take its hand, but ‘tis the trusting hand of you a friend. A friend who is willing to reach unto the murky depths of darkness; reaching out to free a troubled soul, to shine their torch and light the way.

If only for briefest moment, I feel my body rising, ascending to the surface, as if set high upon feathered wings which causes my mind to be once more, to race and soar above a crowed world, no longer alone, invisible -- hidden by the darkness --.

With the days that pass you often ask my thinking as you tend my wounds, mend the bleeding, bringing comfort to my tattered soul. But even as I’m speaking it is my guarded words and not the Demon’s that ring in the empty silence scratched deep upon my soul. For I can not tell you stories of darkened shores and smoky passages with inky-pools of fire where demons lay in waiting to strip me to the core.

For to tell you -- that I spy the Demon perched with patience upon the fortress wall; to tell you that I feel the Demon’s anxiety grow as his pulse quickens with mine; to tell you I taste his stale breath as it lingers upon the air, reminding me he has the morrow – is to say the words that make me scared, more terrified than one-hundred fold of demons dare. For to tell you… to utter these simple words and allow them to pass my lips, is to render me powerless, invisible and alone once more.

Why not all humans are intelligent and other stuff

2011-06-15T20:08:00.000-07:00

O-M-G! I can’t believe it’s not butter, but more importantly I can’t believe it has been so long since I last made an update to my blog. It’s not as though I haven’t had a great deal to say, on the contrary, those that know me, know I have an awful lot to say on a wide variety of subjects. It’s just that I have been very busy trying to keep out of the toy box for as long as possible.

As part of my busy schedule to remain free, I have gone back to school and got a part time job of sorts. It was part of a deal I struck with the House Human, and the lesser evil of the three scenarios ‘it’ presented me with. Really when you think about it though, I had no choice in the matter, and it was all a bit of a con on the House Human’s part, and somehow I don’t think ‘it’ really liked the fact that I was becoming more popular than him.

Admittedly it was somewhat of tough decision to make and I would have spent all of two minutes contemplating my navel fluff, if I had had a navel. I mean which one would you have chosen if you were me:

1) get an education and make something of my life and forget about finding my path to fame and fortune. I think this was a euphemism for you have some wonderful ideas and moderate to poor talent, however, you’re significantly draining the household budget and I can no longer afford to keep you. This option of course tied in nicely with evil choice number two;

2) get sold in to slavery. And while this was at first an attractive option to consider given the array of wicked thoughts that followed through my polly-fill neural pathways, apparently the House Human intended for me to be sold as a rug. Going by the long diatribe that followed and given my size, I can only assume this meant as a toupee. Then there was the final choice;

3) go straight back into the toy box and never see the warm light of day again. Isn’t that just like life, no matter what choice we make in life, we all end up in a box… eventually.

So after many weeks looking through course cattledogs and searching for an educational facility that allowed teddy bears to enrol, I finally found a course that I liked and a University that would let me in and not make fun of the fact that I’m a bear. I tell you I never knew some of you humans were so smart. Us toy box folk have always been of the opinion that you were all dumb. I guess that’s one of the pitfalls of being a toy, and using the House Human as the benchmark to gauge your social skills and level of intelligence.

Being a human, by now you more than likely have two simplistic thoughts running through that mushy stuff you laughingly refer to as brains, right? The first would have to be why all humans aren’t smarter than an 8 inch bear and, what course could shut this bear up for so long when ordinarily it doesn’t shut up long enough to draw breath?

Why not all humans are intelligent and other stuff

As it transpires one of my lecturers at University is a doctor. She is a lovely human, kind, generous in spirit, a very entertaining orator, and very supportive of those around her – she really seems to know what she is talking about; most of the time –. However, I think she is only pretending to be a doctor – sort of like Ken does with Barbie when they think no one else is looking. I had occasion last week to talk with her regarding some issues that had arisen with my coursework. During this conversation I made reference to horrible pain in my tummy and she just looked at me with a blank expression on her face before suggesting I may like to go and talk with a doctor… duh! I thought I was talking to a doctor. Perhaps she’s not familiar with the anatomy of a bear, or she’s not as clever as she would like to make out.

Then there’s this human in the class…. forever with the questions. Every time he opens his mouth another question spews forth, even if there is no need for a question, he questions why there is no question. This kid just goes to prove not all humans are intelligent, and he is also probably the sole reason people get their heads flushed in toilets.

The University is a long way from the toy box, and the House Human lovingly packs my lunch and my backpack each morning before he throws me on the school bus, and I do literally mean throws. The other morning his aim was a little off and I hit the windscreen. Do you have any idea what it’s like being stuck to the front of a bus in the middle of winter? Thank Dog for the widow wiper things; at least I had something to hold on to.

My first class today was Cultural Theory and Practice, the second unit I am doing as I work toward my Masters of Writing. I haven’t quite figured out what this unit has to do with putting words on paper yet, but I do know that the set text has a lot of words in it and cost the House Human a lot of money. Perhaps that is the point of Cultural Theory and Practice. It demonstrates that you can create a culture by writing a book that supposedly relates to writing, then in theory you can wack a fancy title on it, charge whatever you like; before telling those who buy it that they need to practice, practice, and practice if they want to be a writer.

Aside from the study stuff doing my head in, it’s not all bad. There are some fairly funky and perfunctory folk on campus along with one or two Pe’ri, and they’re pretty cool. They have taken me under their wings and are making sure I get to my classes on time and are ensuring I don’t get trodden on. They’re so caring they even went to the trouble the other day of tying a big yellow balloon to me so every could see where I was. The only trouble was the balloon had been filled with helium so I floated around for a while until they eventually got me down… thank Dog for slingshots.

Anyhow I really should go now and do some homework (working on my electronic and social media assignment). I’m also going to ask the House Human if I can have a perforate or two in my ear so I blend in a little more with the Faculty of Arts hipsters, that way I can avoid the perfidy of tongues should I ever be engaged in the perditionish of perfervid philosophical peremptory.

In the meantime, if you have a television show or movie you would love to see reviewed on HYFN.Net let me know as I am always open to suggestions on what to review next.

Also keep an eye out for my StopCyberBullys blog which is currently under construction.

Until next time big bear hugs and best wishes,

Theodore Bear.

:o)

Love Sucks

2011-01-28T23:02:00.001-08:00

Ahhh February, the glorious Technicolored month of love. It is a time of enchantment for all young lovers; a time for romance, of wonder and of candle lit suppers. It is traditionally the month in which sonnets are composed, poems written, proposals made, vows committed and cards exchanged. Sweet words ooze thick like treacle as if set upon the soft fluttering of fairy wings drifting in the summer breeze and unto your beloveds’ waiting ear – sickening isn’t it? --.

For some strange and inexplicable reason that I am yet to grapple the concept of, February also appears to be a time when you humans are compelled to throw all caution, commonsense, self-control and self-respect to the wind and do something really pathetic in the name of that four letter word LOVE. Apart from being stupid, what are you people… lemmings? If so there’s the cliff - I’m sure you can jump further than the last poor bastard did before it hit the ground --.

My safer than jumping of a cliff option for you this month if you want ‘real romance’ is to stop reading my blog here and now; go out and buy yourself the latest Mills & Boon and find yourself a nice quiet train going to East Bumfarq. I can guarantee you two things;

You will find love and romance. It may only be between the pages of the book and not the sheets, but you will find it.
I can also assure you that you can be happy in the knowledge that you will be able to enjoy your book in peace as the world outside your window passes by. No-one in their right mind will want to mug you, attempt to strike up a conversation or try out their latest pick-up line on you while that book remains in your hand. You’ve now been ‘100% Bearified’ by me as a contaminated product. Just imagine the word ‘LOSER’ tattooed cross your forehead from here on in.

But honestly, this romance caper is crap. From this little bears perspective Valentine’s Day appears to be nothing more than an elaborate, commercialised, profiteering, money making hoax put on by chocolate manufacturers, florists and sundry other businesses each year. Furthermore it seems as though it is also a sad excuse for a bunch of attentions seeking frumps to have a day out and try their luck one last time before that last flush of blossom finally wilts and dies. Let’s face it folks, if you’re anything like the House Human and Plan A: the beer goggles didn’t work, then duh, any plan that flows – Plan B or otherwise – is also doomed to failure. If you ain’t been pollinated one way or another after 45 years… it ain’t gunna happen. I’m sorry, but as I keep telling the House Human, give up and get over it. Its time to move forward, learn to self-pollinate and appreciate the ‘self’; celebrate your freedom; you now have a life and can leave the roses on the bush and the white doves in their cages (by the way House Human if by any chance you read this, the money you’ll save on trying to trap a lover with roses and doves is to go in to buying more chocolate – you’ve run out again! --. Oh, and can you stop putting it on the top shelf of the pantry I can’t reach it. Thanks).

For the speed readers amongst you who find my pace of typing slow, and for those of you who are a little slow and haven’t quite grasped my point this month here’s a quick summary: This little bear finds the whole idea of romance a repugnant and tiresome concept – if a vaccine has been developed to combat this debilitating and insidious disease then please let the inoculations begin. If, like me, the thought of love and romance makes you sick to the pit of your stomach – get a chuck bucket. If on the other hand you are one of these pathetic losers drawn in by this terrible deception inflicted upon humanity and the world around you is glorious and grand; where love bounds from every direction; rainbows appear before you and little birds weep in your very presence – don’t you think its about time you got rid of the rose coloured glasses and moved out of ‘Neverland’ – seriously, love sucks!

I for one, and I know I’m not alone here (just ask GI Joe, Action Man and the neglected Cabbage Patch Kid their opinions), consider the very notion of love to be an inconsequential, futile, irrelevant and disturbingly disgusting emotion that is wasted on the weak; lost on the young; tolerated by those that can least afford it, and nothing more an irritation in the jocks of those that don’t want it. Good grief Charlie Brown do you humans not realise the Age of Aquarius with its hippy flower power children and era of free love is just like… so twentieth Century! Why don’t you stop batting eyelashes at each other long enough to do something worthwhile this month other than thinking about love? Surely your time would be far better spent on a more pertinent and worthwhile activity such as bee-keeping; or perhaps you would like a more social networking pursuit, I hear the Four-legged Madagascan Screaming Chook Appreciation Society is always looking for new members (for those who are unaware new activities such as these can be found in your local telephone directory. For example: under ‘A’ for Apiary and ‘O’ for Obscure Hobbies).

Not wishing to come across as mean-spirited, I did give careful consideration to putting together a list of romance related books, poems, movies and songs for this month’s blog for those of you who really want it. However, after said careful consideration (which took about as long to deliberate as it did to write this sentence) I decided against it. Why? Because I just new the list would be littered with the likes of Billy-Ray’s ‘Achy Breaky Heart’; Fergal Sharky’s ‘A good heart’; The Notebook and Sleepless in Seattle. Apart from any thing else I just couldn’t be bothered. If you want to look it up go for it, but I ain’t wasting my time or the House Humans internet connection on it. So instead you get to suffer one of my poems

A Valentine’s Day poem for the disenchanted

Be my Valentine, I think not

No matter when, how or what

To think you love me I know not why

Such a thought, I’m nauseous, I’d rather die

‘Tis true your beauty is beyond compare

And looking at you is hard to bear

Your hair is grey and falling out

Your skin is wrinkled, your lips don’t pout

Your teeth have yellowed, your complexion greyed

Your mind has wandered, your thoughts have strayed

Please don’t caress me, nor kiss me

Don’t hold my hand

If I’m in trouble by me don’t stand

For my pulse don’t quicken

And my heart don’t still

I’ve said it before you make me ill

Please don’t say that you love me

Don’t say that you’ll stay

You know where the door is

Now start heading that way.

FYI folks, throughout the month of February I’m going to be the little furry guy picketing outside the Toy Box and handing out placards and pins to the other toys declaring ‘Love is a sham’. You never know we may even burn Barbie at the stake in protest.

I think in preparation for this time next year I’ll have to start a new Love Sucks movement – if you have any ideas on what we can do to celebrate it drop me a line at Theodore.Bear@hotmail.com.au or send me a tweet.

In the meantime if you’d like to join my anti-happy, anti-love, anti-social anti-group, you can post an anti-comment on this anti-blog or visit my anti-facebook page. For those of you who haven’t located my blog, facebook or twitter account yet you’re not trying hard enough. Look under ‘B’ for bitter and twisted.

Until next time, big hugs to all

Love

Theodore H. Bear

:o)

I am a Fame Monster

2010-12-29T00:46:00.000-08:00

Well folks, my very first Christmas out of the Toy Box has officially been and gone; and it sucked beyond belief. With all my hard work in writing to Santa this year what did I get? Nothing, Nada, zilch and zip. Didn’t even get a Merry Christmas wish from the House Human… how miserable is that? Thanks a lot Santa.

We did get flooded in though, that was an experience to behold and from what my little fuzz filled brain can understand this is only the beginning of the Tropical Monsoon that is said to last another month or so. Where’s a houseboat when you need one.

I guess though a houseboat is only one of the things I need right at this point in time if I am to be held up with the House Human any longer than necessary. So far this week we have spent our time strapped to the couch watching a variety of movies… all musicals (classics according to the House Human) and I simply can’t stand it any longer. I need to feel the fresh cyclonic wind as it blows upon my face… the murky water wash over me as I jump from the front patio into the swollen rivers running down the street, just so I can get away from another strangled verse of ‘Doe a Deer’ or Calamity Jane’s ‘Once I had a secret love’… But I mustn’t complain too much.

I am hoping though that 2011 will see a change to all of that. From what I understand of the human culture thus far, and correct me if I’m wrong (which we all know by now I very rarely am), this is the time of year when human’s get some silly idea in their heads that they can change when they rip an old calendar off the wall and put a new one up.

I figure if you humans can make a resolution for the New Year, so can I.

From what I also understand, when you make one of these New Year Resolution things, you need to make it as big and as grand as possible… and there’s no holding back.

So while many of you will be setting your sights on giving up smoking, going on some wacky crash diet and limiting your alcohol consumption, I am going to be focussing squarely on my new career, a career that is just for me.

Now I have been giving a lot of thought to this career business, and trying to come up with some brilliantly fabulous ideas, but I am still a little stuck with what I can do.

When I first came out of the Toy Box I thought it would be rather spiffy to be a human, and to have all the trappings that go with being human, but now I’m not so sure. For some reason that is currently beyond my comprehension you all seem to struggle so much in trying to find the perfect place in life; the perfect body; the perfect house; the perfect family and the perfect public face. Sadly for some inexplicable reason, I feel upon reflection, and much to my own detriment as a bear, I have started to develop some of these same human flaws.

I am no longer content and satisfied with just being another little bear… sitting quietly with all the other toys watching the world pass me by. I want more; much, much more out of life.

I don’t want any old job; I want the perfect career that will make me lots of money. I want to be placed upon a pedestal and have the paparazzi wanting to take photos of me at every twist and turn as I drive my brand new top of the range Mercedes convertible down Sunset Boulevard. I want adoring fans waving at me as though they were long lost friends; I want them begging for my autograph (presumably so they can sell it on eBay and make a motza) as I step out onto the red carpet and into the latest and hottest nightclub in town.

Yes folks, since I came out of the Toy Box I have been listening to the words, wisdom and inspiration of Mother Monster herself; Lady Gaga. I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt that I Theodore H. Bear have been bitten by the Fame Monster. A bite that has injected its venom so deep it cannot be stopped.

I know I am invincible and destine for far bigger things than the House Human will ever be; given its current daily 9 to 5 grind at the office. Yes it is a sad fact of life that the House Human is a rare oddity in this world and it has no desire to be anything more than what it is – a TV addicted, beer swilling, microwave meal consuming … plodder. Nothing more and nothing less, just a plodder who is happy to remain invisible and for the world to continue on its merry way without him.

Not me. I tain’t no plodder and never will be. I don’t want to be left standing at the gates of Toy Heaven with my stuffing hanging out for all to see. I don’t want to be the one asking ‘Is that all there is?’ as I draw my last breath into my 100% polyester lungs… No Sir! I want to be dragged and chained to the gates of Toy Heaven screaming. Screaming ‘Give me more! The ride ain’t over yet baby!’

To give me more and to set my little paws on the true path to famedom I unquestionably deserve and desire, I made a little list setting out all my skills. As you can imagine it wasn’t very long list (in comparison to the one I made for Christmas) after all I am only a small bear.

So let’s see on the downside of up;

1. can’t sing. so no music career even though I would like to be a rapper;

2. can’t dance, so there is no chance of me being the next Fred Astar or being on So You Think You Can Dance (plus Cat Deeley might stand on me);

3. can’t paint, nor draw, so being the next Picasso is out… plus do you have any idea how hard it is to get acrylic paint out of fur.

4. can’t be a Celeb Gossip Guru cause Perez Hilton already has that role and he won’t answer my e-mails … I think someone referred to my persistence as restraining order material (not sure what that is so I’ll need to find a dictionary later);

5. can’t act so there is no chance of me being Pearce Brosnan, and I’m not sure how they would feel about an 8 inch bear being the next James Bond given they would have to scale everything down. But at least they wouldn’t need a multi-million dollar budget. Hmmm, perhaps I could be a director or writer;

Things seem to be a little stacked against me in the career stakes at the moment.

Now for the pluses, and I always like the pluses;

I am slightly on the cute side
I have a few friends on facebook and twitter
and my head is filled with fluff….

I guess as a last resort I could be Paris Hilton and make lots of money from doing nothing; after all it does appear as though we share the same skill set… Then on second thoughts, I’d rather not.

Well it seems my search for new found famedom and the perfect career for 2011 has come to an unforseen and sudden halt. It also appears that this task has proven to be slightly harder than I first thought so it is no wonder so many humans fail when making a New Year Resolution commitment (yes folks a commitment that requires careful planning and consideration).

While I can only assume that this is a temporary hiatus and I know I will be back on track in no time because I am committed to being famous, it is easy to see how some (like the House Human) give up and fall by the wayside. Sometimes it is much easier to be considered a plodder; a person that holds the world together, a person that encourages and makes room for others so they can be the best that they can be.

In the meantime, while I continue to contemplate how I can be famous and live out my dream in 2011 with your support, I hope you come up with the perfect New Year Resolution for the new life you imagine for yourself.

And by the way, if you have any bright ideas on what new and exciting career path I can have then drop me a line. The Toy Box is always open to suggestions.

Although, if any of you dare tell me I could be the third little bear in Goldie Locks for next year’s panto then watch out. I will personally come around there and beat on you.

Until next time may you and yours have a happy, safe and prosperous 2011.

Best wishes

Theodore H. Bear

xoxo and a big hug.

Jingle my bells this Christmas

2010-12-22T12:09:00.000-08:00

It’s hard to believe that we are in December already. No sooner did the year seem to start and in the blink of an eye it was gone. And just think, in another few short sleeps it will be Christmas.

Ahhh. Christmas, I’m just so excited about it; mistletoe, plum pudding, backyard cricket, but best of all the presents I’m going to get.

Since I have been such a good little bear (most of the time anyway, and the times I have not, I can explain), I thought I would try my hand at writing to Santa again this year to see what would happen. So far I have written to him four times, and he still hasn’t responded... I have muttered a few choice words about that as you can imagine, but I guess I haven’t been specific enough.

This time around though I’ve been very specific and I’ve provided Santa with a somewhat extensive and comprehensive list of all the things I would like this year – my list included an Appendix A and B containing all the other stuff he didn’t give me in the previous years.

To ensure that my request does not go unnoticed this time, I have sent him multiple copies by registered mail and several nagging emails so there can be absolutely no excuse that he didn’t receive it.

Top of my list this year is a new pad…no not an iPhone or laptop, but somewhere away from the toy box where I can kick back and relax; a place to shed the fur and wander naked once in a while should I choose. Yes somewhere I can invite Matt Keyte to come and play. Most importantly though, somewhere where I can jingle my bells this Christmas and I don’t have to put up with that bitch Barbie constantly whining, harping and badgering the rest of us; telling us how insignificant we are in comparison to the marvelous universe she rules. How awe inspiring she is – not -.

To get the ball rolling I have been pawing through all the latest toy catalogues that have come through the mail, I have been on line and checked out all the latest plans, and finally I found the one just for me. It is without a doubt the most fabulous 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom multi-level home you have ever seen, and I reckon at $425.95 it a real steal. Throw in the pool and convertible Mercedes (both sold separately of course) and you have a place that even Brad and Ange would be envious of… I can see the look on their faces now should they come to visit in the New Year; not sure if the look is shear jealousy or annoyance because I’m gunna call them losers from the upper balcony that overlooks the triple bay garage as they walk up the beautifully landscaped mansion drive.

Is it wrong though that it’s pink (or as I would prefer to describe it … fuchsia), and I’m a boy bear?

I just hope the house human didn’t see my letter to Santi, otherwise there will be the usual suggestion of ‘Oh, why don’t I buy you a kit home and put it together for you on Christmas morning?’ Yeah right! It will end up like all those other home improvement projects he has started. Come Christmas morning there will be ample enthusiasm followed by swearing, cursing and cussing and nothing will have been done. And come Christmas morning next year the kit home will have been tossed to one side and used as fire wood and toothpicks throughout the year.

And of course I would still be homeless (perhaps not if by then I have ripped Barbie’s head before then, then Mr Plod would be taking care of me instead at the local jail… so no home needed and I get to wear a nice comfy pair of handcuffs).

Now given you all a little indication of what I have asked for for Christmas, I would like take this opportunity to apologise to everyone in advance about Christmas. Why? Because if Santa is late in delivering your presents; or you get none at all because there was no room left on his sled, then remember this…

It’s not my fault you were late posting your letter to the North Pole.

Apart from what I want for Christmas the festive season can be incredibly chaotic and stressful, so it’s important that we look after ourselves and avoid triggers for poor mental health. There are simple things we can do to build our resilience. We can’t necessarily avoid stressful situations altogether but it’s important to respond to what is in our control, such as limiting alcohol consumption and remembering to take some quiet time out for yourself.

To help you retain your sanity and get you through this silly season, the Mental Health Association NSW has some useful tips to keep you going.

Managing relationships at Christmas

Set aside time for yourself. This can be something as simple as going for a short walk, or having a nap. Having some ‘me time’ to get away from it all will help you relax.

Look after your physical health. Getting enough sleep, keeping up your regular physical activity

routine, using relaxation techniques, and eating and drinking with moderation will help give you the stamina to get through the demands of the season.

Christmas is lonely for many—spread the cheer

Festive stress is normal

Remember just because some things are ‘supposed’ to be fun and festive around holiday time, doesn’t mean you have to be.

But above all else, relax and enjoy the time being you.

Anyhow’s until January 2011, may you all have a happy, safe and jolly time. Remember to play nicely with the other children and remember my motto for this Holiday Season…. ‘The more the merrier’ and you know what I mean.

Best Wishes

Theodore H. Bear

Flipped out & flopped in a funk – what is the true path to happiness?

2010-12-10T20:15:00.000-08:00

It’s been an eerily quiet month, hence no blog update. The quietness can only mean one of two things; the house human is on holidays (which I very much doubt, because this is something he never does); or he has flipped out and flopped in a funk… Odds are it’s the latter of the two.

And if perchance I should be foolhardy enough to venture into the lounge-room to prove this thought true, I know in the depths of my white poly-filled heart I will be confronted by one of the most distressing sights a little bear should ever see.

A scene that will, and has in the past left me scared for life.

A devastatingly horrific setting of a skinny, long haired, middle-age man sprawled across the couch, complete with ill-fitting Y Fronts, empty Pepsi cans and flatulence. Think Homer Simpson meets Glenn Quagmire come Entourages - Johnny Drama and you will being to get an inkling of the picture I am trying to paint. Throw in the thick rich chocolate topping oozing slowly down the chin of the house human as he tries his best to eat his way through yet another tub of double chocolate, chocolate chip ice-cream – and you’re an extra step closer to my living nightmare.

Yes sadly, it has become an all too common scene at our place. And it is days like these we choose to remain safely tucked up in the toy box and not to venture out through fear that we will be tossed to the curb. Tossed aside in the vein hope that this will, in some way sooth the gnawing nagging heart and clear a foggy mind of the house human while in a fugue state. So much for a mid-life crisis being nothing more than a temporary hiatus, a speed bump on the journey of life – it seems to me that it’s more of a giant excavation, and you don’t want to get too close to the edge in fear that you will fall through to an abyss of nothingness where the darkness eats you from the inside out. If this is what means to be human, all I can say is ‘thank the stars I am a bear – and I’m already stuffed’.

Given the house humans’ current frame of mind, I got to thinking, what makes humans happy beyond all doubt? And, is there really a path to true happiness? If there is, please tell me it is paved with gold and not good intentions; that it will lead to the Land of Oz and not to yet another thinly disguised, tragically droll, predictable plot-line that imagines itself to be a heartwarming story of life.

Short of telling him to get a life – preferably his own -, to help him out us toys got together and we did a stock-take of his life, to see all the good stuff he has going on. You know the count your blessings sort of thing. He didn’t like what we came up with. We even went as far as buying him the The Dalai Lama's Book of Wisdom, his The Meaning of Life, and Winnie the Pooh’s Book, Tao of Pooh and Te of Piglet . Both books, but particularly the one of Pooh’s seemed to brighten his day somewhat.

I thought about suggesting that he reinvent himself, create a new persona that he liked. The sort of person he would like the world to see. But perhaps in his case that is not the best thing – he has had more comebacks and reinvented himself more times than I can count. Cher and Madonna would be proud of his efforts in that area.

We also had heard that exercise can help fight the funk. So like the dutiful human he is, he went out and got himself a gym membership. Like most things though he didn’t have sufficient motivation to go. So now he has 12 months worth of gym classes. Oh well, at least it will make a good Christmas present for someone.

Finally I resorted to making a list. I have written it on the front of the fridge with permanent marker, and because it’s in the biggest letters my little paws could manage, he will see it every day:

Theo Bears Top 10 Tips for Humans to be Happy

1. Despite what others say or think, no one is perfect, except for me – learn to like and love yourself – you are your own worst enemy.

2. You are never alone; you always have a shoulder to cry on; even if it is only a toy bear.

3. Focus on the positive by thinking of at least one good thing you achieved today, like making someone smile… Admittedly we did have a bit of a chuckle when your bits fell out of your Y Fronts, so that’s your good deed over and done with for now.

4. Let go of the past. While you can learn from it, it serves no meaningful purpose if you only choose to remember the bad things. Like the day the dog ripped my leg off – I now know not to go near the dog. I also know that I can tease and make fun of the dog for as long as I like providing she is on the other side of the screen door… and remains there.

5. Set a small goal and work toward it. Once you’re there choose another one slightly bigger – let’s start by say… cleaning the bathroom sink, it’s not bear hair in the plug hole you know.

6. To lift you spirits watch a funny movie for once. I swear if you watch another one that puts you on a downer, I’ll beat on you.

7. Find someone like a friend or relative you like to spend time with and make a day or night of it. Yes that will mean you have to make at least one friend first, but please try… for me.

8. Don’t think too much about the future, you can’t control it and I know how much it can hurt your small brain when you do. So just sit back and enjoy the ride by being the best you can.

9. Eat a good balanced diet and exercise. I am spooning the ice-cream down the drain as you read this so there will be nothing left in the fridge… what ya gunna do now cause that just leaves the month old apples; tomatoes; lettuce and box of cereal. By the way dude the shops are closed.

10. Find something that inspires you and do it. Remember that personal development course you wanted to do? Well you’re enrolled and class starts Monday 9 am. Better be there or I’ll call the truancy officer to come and get you.

After having written my list, I realise that being and remaining positive for humans is hard work. Much harder than it is for bears by far, and it appears as though it is something that can be much easier to achieve for some humans than it is for others. Perhaps the true path to happiness is hidden in finding out what we would really like to be doing, and then taking simple steps to doing it.

I have always figured that life is about freedom of choice and being comfortable in our own fur. We can choose our friends, choose where we live the majority of the time, where we work, our hobbies and our lovers. Over the years I have become strangely aware of one of the most common choices humans tend to make, that of choosing not to see past the end of their nose. Perhaps if they looked at themselves honestly from another perspective (not necessarily how they imagine others would see them) they may well find the answer or solution they so desire is like the television remote - sitting patiently on the couch beside them waiting to change the channel-.

Perhaps when we learn to accept the things we can’t change, and change the things that are within our control, we will all find that the true path to happiness is the one found in the space that separates the two.

Life should leave you wanting less as you get older, not more.

Recommended Reading

The Mindful Way through Depression: Freeing Yourself from Chronic Unhappiness

The Depression Cure: The 6-Step Program to Beat Depression without Drugs

How to Be Happy

When Am I Going to Be Happy?: How to Break the Emotional Bad Habits That Make You Miserable

Zen and the Art of Happiness

On Erin Brockovich and the ‘what if’ of destiny

2010-11-06T20:31:00.000-07:00

The other night the house human went out. We love the nights he goes somewhere as we don’t have to listen to his endless moaning and whinging about this that and the other, and it lets us get on with the more important things in life… like movie night.

With the house to ourselves at last, pillows were plumped, we busted out the microwave popcorn; we raided the fridge and pantry for ice-cream and chocolate… have never quite figured out why the house human insists on putting the chocolate on the top shelf where he thinks it’s out of reach – he knows we’ll get it eventually.

Because the house human is not very trusting of us, all the good X rated DVD’s and liquor are locked away and we are left with little more than red cordial and the most boring of films to watch. Honestly how many times can you possibly watch Adam Sandler in The Wedding Singer or Daniel Craig as James Bond and still get excited by it? Really.

Much to our pleasant surprise it appears that it was our lucky night when we discovered a few new films somehow managed to get worked into the mix. Amongst the mix of new movies was story of Erin Brockovich. I won’t go in to the story-line because if you haven’t seen it then it will ruin it, and if you have seen it, I’ll just bore you more than normal.

Any way as the movie progressed we began to discuss the ‘what if’ concept of Erin Brockovich. You know the sort of thing, the stuff that could tie you mind up in knots if you let it; what if she wasn’t looking for work; what if she didn’t stop for that cigarette; what if she wasn’t in that accident; what if she didn’t talk her way in to a job with that law firm; what if she was considered one of the girls; what if someone else had opened the file; what if she was not curiously obsessed with a pro bono case; what if she didn’t have a mind of her own and did what she was told, what if she wasn’t motivated etc. etc. Then we guessed there would have been no David and Goliath story, no-one would have taken up the cause for the contaminated community, and possibly no-one would have heard of Erin Brockovich. Would she still be a divorced mother of three with no job, or would destiny have found another way for her to be what she ultimately became?

We have often heard our house human remark that ‘everything happens for a reason’ and ‘everything has a purpose – and no matter how small or insignificant something may first appear, it may be the thing that changes the world-’. The thought of ‘purpose’ and the ‘what if’s’ of Erin Brockovich’s destiny got us thinking about our own places in the world, our purpose, and ultimately our own destiny.

So if we moved beyond the realm of reality, and if we weren’t toys, what sort of incredible things could we achieve? Could we bring about world peace, feed the world or discover an environmentally friendly and renewable source of energy. Like humans we too could achieve greatness. We could be lawyers, doctors, astronauts, movie stars, singers, writers, poets, millionaires and magnates. We could be famous, have our own character franchise like movie stars do. You know the sort of stuff; lunch boxes, books, water bottles; party things; dolls in our likeness. Arr, hang about, we’re already toys! Does this mean humans actually aspire to be like us… toys? Interesting thought that one.

Let’s face it, no matter who or what we are, we all aspire to be something other than our own mundane selves, and I dare say those of us who are great aspire to be something other than that. Perhaps when I reach greatness, I can tell you what I aspire to next.

Anyway, after our philosophical discussion about the ‘what if’s’ (not regrets) that lasted for some considerable time, we decided to put ourselves in Erin Brockovich’s shoes and asked ourselves the question: Could any of us have been Erin Brockovich if the exact same conditions and circumstances were applied?

The answer was no.

It was decided by majority rule that the ‘what if’ of destiny is a unique set of circumstances attached to a particular person and to a particular point in time. Even with the same environment and circumstances the outcome would not be the same - quite simply because we were not Erin Brockovich and it was not our destiny-. It was also decided the point in time itself was a critical juncture that had the power to delay a person’s destiny, or prompt them to follow a new path while delivering the same or similar outcome eventually.

To test if destiny was indeed preordained we attempted an experiment using the Sims 3 – a computer game favoured by the house human. We created a person (excuse me Sims Creators, if you read this please note not everyone that plays your games is human and we would appreciate if you would throw in the occasional bear related feature), gave the person some traits such as clumsy, daredevil, loves the outdoors etc., and gave them a place to live. We then set about wreaking havoc and doing some fairly funky stuff until we finally found what we were looking for… DEATH.

The first time our Sim died, he was burnt in a fire (only because he wasn’t a real good cook), once he was well and truly cooked we exited the game without saving and had another go at life. The next time we decided our Sim should eat out rather than attempting to cook, thereby avoiding the possibility of becoming a crispy critter. Did this stop death from leaving a calling card? No. Poor little Sims3 man got electrocuted instead.

Each time we exited the game without saving, and each time we played with our Sim we would avoid the set of circumstances that lead to his death. Much to our excitement, our little friend would somehow find another new and exciting way to die. There was no saving him.

While we may never know what it is that changes the course of a person’s history, what it is that prompts a person to turn left instead of right at a critical juncture, or what it is that makes someone more famous than another, it is important to understand that we all have different opportunities in life. We can’t just sit back and wait thinking destiny will find us sooner or later. We should all be looking for our ‘what if’ opportunity all the time.

Our house human may be a pain in the bum from time to time, but every now and then he says something somewhat intelligent. Perhaps he’s right ‘everything happens for a reason’ and ‘everything has a purpose – no matter how small or insignificant something may first appear, it may be the thing that changes the world-’.

Just as there can only be one Lady Ga Ga, one John Barrowman, one Kate Bush and one George Michael, there can only be one of you. Are you the thing that will change the world? Don’t wait for destiny to find you. Find it. Grab it by the balls and squeeze it so tight it screams. You may not be able to avoid the inevitable but you can certainly make your mark and have fun doing it while you wait.

If destiny is and always will be preordained, then I will never be anything more than 8 inches of bear trying to change the world.

Until next time

Big Hugs & Best Wishes

Theodore H. Bear

I'm Theodore H. Bear & Movember is here

2010-10-30T19:59:00.000-07:00

Like OMG!
Can you believe this... I'm an 8 inch bear that has finally climbed his way out of the toy box and into the real world. This technology stuff is just like so exciting... where do you start?

Well, I decided to find myself some new friends. Believe me being in the toy box is not all its cracked up to be. I don't like Barbie, talk about the green eyeshaddowed monster, she's such a pushy cow when Ken's around, and GI Joe, nice muscles but absolutly no conversational skills. He spends half his day working out, and the other half playing solders with action man, the most you ever get out of him is.... well let's not go there, just yet.

Since I have been out of the toy box I have made some great new friends. Some are a little strange, some rather percular, and others very straight-laced, but in all they're good fun to be around.

This month they have really helped me out though. I said I wanted to do something to help change the world. The looked and looked until they discovered Movember. Sounds fabulous don't it? All you have to do is grow a mustache and raise money for men's health, I mean how hard can that be?

A little harder than I thought thats for sure. First off my other toy friends don't have any money... they work their asses off for the big toy companies so they can earn quid, but what do we get in return. Nothing, nadda, zip, zilch... we get thrown in a box and sold off to the nearest brat - that's gratitude for you. So like I was saying I made some new friends .

Next problem, how does an 8 inch 100 percent polly filled fibre bear grow a mo for Movember... easy you beg one of you new friends to pull out their hair strand by strand and give it to you every time you get a donation for the Foundation - Was so excited I already got $50.00 so that's like a million hairs! Can't wait to Tweet that.

I really do like being out of the toy box - new friends and a cause. I really feel like I'm going to change the world. I know no one will read my blog but that's ok, after all who would really want to listen to the rantings and toy box philosophy of an 8 inch bear.

If you do want to listen though, feel free to send me an email, ask me questions, friend me on facebook and check out the causes I support, or tweet me on twitter. But in the mean time find out about what's happening for Movember in your country... If you don't have it going on there contact one of the Movember Crew to see how you get it on.

Any way until my next time big bear hugs
Theodore H. Bear