A moment to-share

Creativity

2012-02-16T10:23:00.001+08:00

Where are you hiding?

Saint Valentin!

2012-02-14T09:22:00.000+08:00

Joyeux St. Valentin! Qui va donner les roses aux parents en disant Bonne Santé, ou donner les à la copine en demandant une journée ensemble? Mais attention, cette année, beaucoup de surveillance devant des motels et ils sont sur place maintenant je crois. LoL!!! Les parents vont être bouleversés s'ils seront demandés à singer pour que leurs enfants soient libre de bureau de la police. Devez penser à vos Parents! Dites les "Joyeux St. Valentin!" et donnez les une bisou en disant "Bonne Santé"!
C'est inestimable!!!

Three wishes!

2012-02-11T12:21:00.002+08:00

A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods.
She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.
The frog said to her, 'If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes.'
The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, 'Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.

Whatever you wish for, your husband will get ten times of it!' The woman said, 'That's okay.'

For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world.
The frog warned her, 'You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to'.
The woman replied, 'That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will have eyes only for me.'
So, KAZAM- she's the most beautiful Woman in the world!

For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world.
The frog said, 'That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than
you. '
The woman said, 'That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine.'
So, KAZAM- she's the richest woman in the world!

The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, 'I'd like to have a mild heart attack.'

Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.

Attention

Female Readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good!

Male readers: Please scroll down....

The man had a heart attack ten times 'milder' than his wife!!!

Moral of the story : Women always think they're really smart .

PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!

One wish

2012-01-10T08:57:00.001+08:00

A biker was riding along a California beach when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.” The biker pulled over and said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.”

The Lord said, “Your request is materialistic. Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for Me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind.”

The biker thought about it for a long time Finally he said, “Lord, I wish that I and all men could understand our wives. I want to know how she feels inside, what she’s thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing’s wrong, and how I can make a woman truly happy.”

The Lord replied, “You want two lanes or four on that bridge?.”

Mom or dad?

2011-12-14T07:14:00.001+08:00

Father: Do you love me or your mum more?

Son: I love both of you equally much.

Father: What if I go America and your mum goes to Paris, where will you go?

Son: Paris of course, it is much beautiful there.

Father: Then what if I go Paris and your mum goes America, where will you go?

Son: America!

Father: So you're bent on following your mum?

Son: No, it's because I already went to Paris earlier!

Clear your environment

2011-12-02T10:12:00.000+08:00

Fear of future
If you are surrounded by more things than you can manage, you feel a weakness on a subliminal level. This feeling can transfer to other areas of life in which you would otherwise be fully effective. Clutter impairs your development, because things that are piled up are frequently associated with memories, so they bind you to the past.

Solution?

à ce moment

2011-11-30T20:26:00.000+08:00

Un joli matin, il faut bien préparer et bien faire. Apres ça, on va 'rock' :)
Mais cette nuit ci, je vais la passer blanc.

50 Productive Things To Do to Organize Your Life

2011-11-26T02:08:00.000+08:00

Learning and exploring Linux and open source technologies requires lot of free time in hand.

The best way to get free time is to eliminate unnecessary things from your life, and try to organize your life.

Even if you adapt handful of ideas from this list, you’ve taken a huge step towards organizing your life and being productive.

Organize your schedule using Google Calendar. Add only the things that you have to absolutely do at a certain time in the calendar. Calendar is not a place to organize your to-do list.
Organize your tasks using a To-Do List Manager.
Adapt a highly flexible productivity framework like Getting Things Done
For your bigger projects that contains several dependent tasks, use a free project management software.
When you focus on getting things done, turn-off everything else. Put your phone in silent mode, disconnect internet, log-out of IM. While getting things done, your focus should only be on that action, and nothing else. Be present in everything you do. This is true whether you are working on a critical project, or playing with your kids.
Throw away all the junk foods from your refrigerator. Go to grocery store and purchasefresh and healthy food. Learn how to read the Nutrition Facts Label effectively.
Exercise regularly. Don’t exercise because you have to, do it because it is fun to do. If you hate to go to gym, run outside, or pick a sport that you enjoy and play regularly.
Create routines for everything. Try to do the chores exactly at the same day and time every week. For example, laundry routine, house cleaning routine, digital clean-up routine, etc. Add these routines to your calender to commit yourself to do it at that time.
Organize all your digital pictures and videos online. Most of you might be taking 100′s of pictures every month, and might not even go back and view it later. I recommend that you have two sets of pictures and videos. The first is a big set contains all the pictures and videos you take. The second is a small set that contains only the pictures and videos that you like the most. I usually do this every month. So, I have the pictures and videos organized by month in two sets.
Use dual monitors. Once you start using two monitors, you’ll never go back to using single monitor ever again.
Automate all your bill payments. Enroll for online bill pay with your banking. If your credit card company (or anybody who sends you a statement) have a automatic payment option, where they can take money directly from your bank account, enroll for that.
Identify and eliminate conflicts within yourself. To be productive it is important to make peace with yourself. If you decide not to organize certain aspects of your life, it is fine, but should not feel bad when you think about it. It should naturally feel Ok for you not to do certain things. Identifying the inner conflicts is the hard part, as for most part, it is not obvious. A simple and critical example is your work. If your current employer/job doesn’t match what you think as a job that you should be doing, you have a conflict here. Unless you resolve this, it is hard to be productive and organize your life.
To be productive (in both personal life and work life), you should do what you love, and love what you do. This is true on big things like working on a multi-million dollar project, or on small things like cleaning-up your closet.
Define a clear outcome for everything you do. Don’t do anything without having a clear idea on what you expect out of it. You need to know the outcome you expect even before you perform the task.
To be productive in front of the computer, you need to learn the keyboard shortcuts of your most frequently used applications.
Donate things that you don’t use to a charity organization of your choice. You also get tax benefit from this.
Take some time to think about how you can make some of your chores easy to perform. Do you have the most efficient tools to clean your floor, tiles, etc. If not, research on those and buy appropriate tools and accessories that are required to make these jobs easier.
Create a list of the best restaurants in your area that you want to try out. Later when you feel like eating out, don’t go to the same restaurant you go every time. Instead, pick one from the list you created.
Go digital. Scan all your papers and covert them to PDF. Use a high speed bulk double-side scanner. I use Fujitsu ScanSnap S1500 Instant PDF Sheet-Fed Scanner for PC and I love it.
For those documents that still need to be kept as paper (for example, legal documents),use a good filling cabinet to organize them in folders that are labeled by alphabets. I recommend any HON filling cabinets, they are well made and worth the money you spend on it. I have the HON 510 Series Drawer Full-Suspension Letter File and I highly recommended it.
If there are items that you keep purchasing at a certain interval, use the Amazon Subscribe and Save service that will automatically deliver the items that you choose on an on-going basis at regular intervals. As an added bonus, you’ll also get additional savings on these items.
Every item in your home needs to have its own place. Take time to assign a place for every item in your home. If you see things scatter around in your house, don’t just pick it up and stuff it somewhere, instead assign a place for it, and tell everybody in your family that this item needs to go to that specific location. This way everybody in your family knows where to look for that specific item when they are searching for it.
Doing nothing and just relaxing is extremely productive. You need to unwind frequently to be productive. Watching TV doesn’t belong in this category.
Stop watching TV! If that is not possible, at least plan to reduce your TV watching time. List out your favorites shows and record them to DVR, and watch them later, by skipping the commercials.
During the weekends, take time to plan for next week, review your calendar appointments, review your goal list, and create appropriate tasks for next week. This is also a good time to organize the cloths and shoes that you are planning to wear next week, and make sure they are nicely folded or hanged and ready to go when want it fast next week.
Your wallet is not the place to dump everything. Clean-up your wallet and keep only the things you need in it. I have only three items in my slim wallet–driver license, one credit card, and a 20 dollar bill.
Don’t run around in the last minute trying to figure out what gifts to get for your loved ones for their birthday. Take time to think about this now. Once you finalize it, and add it to your calendar with the specific item name that you want to purchase. When the time comes, you just have to order it for their birthday.
Learn and educate yourself constantly. Create an Amazon Wish List and add the books that you want to read at some point.
Ask yourself this question: “If I had only one year to live, how would I use the next 365 days?”. If you take time to give this a deep thought, you’ll absolutely be productive and do only the most important thing in your life every minute of your day.
Pick one room (or closet) at a time, and clean it up. The best and productive way to clean-up a mess is: 1) Empty everything from the room/closet to the floor 2) Group the items into three categories–Need it, Don’t need it, May be. 3) Organize the items from “Need it” group back in the room/closet 4) Put the items from “Don’t need it” group in a box and donate it. 5) Put the items from “May be” group in a box and store it in the garage. If you don’t open the “May be” box in the next 6 months, donate it.
Get a big inbox (or a heavy duty wall hanger) and mount it on the inside of your front door (or next to the front door). When you come inside your home, hang your bags, keys, cellphones, etc in this inbox/hanger. Also, if you have to take something when you to go office tomorrow, and don’t want to forget it, hang it immediately in this inbox/hanger next to the front door. This way when you leave, you’ll always check this and don’t forget to take the things you need.
Schedule an appointment for your annual health checkup, dental checkup and vision checkup. Add this to your calendar so that you don’t forget to do this every year.
More organizing tools: Get rid of physical receipts and business cards using shoeboxed,Pageonce – organize online accounts, Zefty – Manage kids allowances (virtual, no money involved), evite - For party planning and invitations.
Play around with these tools and choose only the things that fits your need: Gurulib - organize your home library, Bookbump, Tune-up – organize your music collections.
Take time to think about how you like to manage your finance. Make it a point to save at least 25% of your monthly income into a dedicated retirement savings account.
If you have valuable things that you don’t need it anymore, sell it online on craigslist or ebay.
Project Gutenberg has over 36,000 free ebooks that can be downloaded to your PC, or mobile devices. Browse their top 100 ebooks list.
Browse the diy network and bookmark the projects that you are interested in doing it yourself, and do those later.
Don’t multitask. There is a misunderstanding that doing multiple tasks at once is very productive. This is not true. When you muti-task, there is no focus. For example, when you try to do three things at once, it might take 30 mins to complete all those three tasks. If you do those three tasks one-by-one, it might still take the same 30 mins to complete all of them. But, there is a big difference. The quality of the work when you multi-task is not the same as the quality of the work when you just focus on one task at a time.
Eliminate paper statements. Are you still getting your cell phone statements (and other statements) in postal mail? Pretty much every consumer businesses offers estatements. But you have to sign-up for those. Anytime you get a paper statement in paper mail, go to their website and sign-up for estatement.
Organize all your bookmarks online using delicious.
Schedule an automatic backup of your system. Use windows backup software, or linux backup solutions accordingly.
Backup your critical documents online. Dropbox offers 2GB of free online storage. Once you drop a file in dropbox, you can work on them like a local file from Windows, Linux, Mac, iPad, iPhone, Android and Blackberry.
More online to-do list management software: Play around with these and choose the one that fits your need. VitaList for GTD, Now Do This (I like this, it is very simple), zenbe list
Take baby steps. If you’ve never organized your life before, it will be overwhelming to even start. All you have to do is take one baby step towards organizing and being productive. Pick the one small thing that you want to organize today. It may just be cleaning up and organizing the items on your desk. Even when you start small, have a system in place, so that next time when your desk gets messed-up, you can clean it up in seconds without even thinking about it. This is the fundamental of kaizen philosophy. Read the “One small step can change your life, The Kaizen Way book” to understand how to apply this philosophy in your day to day activities.
Create a dedicated emergency backpack. When there is an emergency you won’t have time to collect all the necessary document and rush to hospital. So, take time now to assign a backpack dedicated for emergency purpose. Create a emergency info sheet that contains your SSN number, name, dob, age, birthdate, medical issue list, etc, for each and every one of your family member. Take a copy of your license, insurance, and related documents that might be required for emergency hospital visit and keep that in the backpack. Put anything else that you think is necessary for emergency in this backpack. I even have a cellphone charger in this backpack which I never take it out for day-to-day use.
There are lot of ways to get free book, or swap your existing books for something you like. Explore services like Bookmooch, Paper Back Swap.
Even if you don’t feel like doing any of the items in this list, don’t just browse random funny videos online. Watch educational and inspiring videos at TED talks. One of these videos might give you the inspiration to do meaningful work that will keep you productive.
If you want to be productive and organize your life, you should focus on identifying the time wasters in your life and eliminate it. This is an ongoing process for me, but I’ve got very good at this. Not watching TV was the biggest improvement I’ve made in my life. It just gave me so much free time that I can productively use on things that makes my life better. Some other typical time wasters that you should reduce or eliminate are: Internet surfing, chatting online with friends, social media websites, email, shopping, useless long water-cooler discussions, etc.
Focus only on the essentials. We have way too many projects at work and home. Some of them are essential and critical that will have a big impact. But most of them are useless and we just do it thinking those are critical. If you want to be productive, you should focus only on the high impact essential projects that will enhance your life (and the life of everybody around you). You should focus on simplifying your life. Once you pair it down to the essentials, you’ll love life and every body around you, and you’ll be extremely productive and happy in both work and personal life.

Set Back!

2011-11-22T13:45:00.002+08:00

Lord, forgive what I have done!
Forgive me if I have forgotten you!
Sorry if I broke your heart! But I know you are always welcome me back with your warm hugs.
I am like a flower, quickly fading.. Reign my heart Lord.

Shoalin - Enlightenment

2011-11-20T23:17:00.000+08:00

An unconditional heart brings great blessings with no boundary
Without boundaries, our fragile lives are all connected through love
Why do you turn a blind eye and let yourselves be restricted by the status quo?
Willingly, I finally come to my senses to realize my character and my emptiness

Let go of your inverted dreams, let go of the things which will one day fade away
Let go of your leisure, desire, pleasure, and let go of suspense
With one more thing in hand, more danger will follow
With less things, greed will lessen as well
If this is fate, no matter how bitter life can be you are always contented
Yet if it isn’t, just bury this love in your heart
In this live of ours, everything’s interconnected, and it takes only a split second to look back
Let me plant a seed of good will and walk down this road of life together with you

Only someone whose heart is not bounded can accomplish great things
Only someone whose heart does not have a story is indigenous above all
I’ve considered heaven and earth, and I’ve considered everything from my past
Yet I still cannot make out the days of life and death
Do not hate your eyes which deceive you
Do not resent, for happiness is not far away
As thoughts are built around your desires, it only takes a split second to decide between good and evil

With a heart of repentance, let me walk down this road of life together with you
No matter how firm your lies may be, they cannot escape the eyes of God
Before dawn, your heart is being dragged further away
As the clouds are able to blind our eyes in an instant, so do human hearts change
Bitterness have been accumulated since long before, and is bound to keep coming

Birth is a happy occasion

2011-11-08T11:25:00.002+08:00

Congratulation Shahanov Azat, who become father today!
You are a real man, be a great father ever!

Rasulullah (saws) said, "When the son of Adam (human being) dies, his deeds are stopped except for three things, namely, his good deeds, his knowledge, and his pious child who prays for him."

2011-11-08T10:17:00.000+08:00

A couple lost their 25 year old son in a fire at home on June 4th. The son who had graduated with MBA from the University of Wisconsin-Madis on two weeks earlier had come home for a while.

He had lunch with his dad at home and decided to go back to clean up his hostel room. His father told him to wait, to meet his mother, before he went back for a few days.
He decided to take a napwhile waiting for his mom to come back home from work.

Some time later their neighbors called 911 when they saw black smoke coming out of the house.
Unfortunately, the 25 years old died in the three year old house.
It took several days of investigation to find out the cause of the fire.
It was determined that the fire was caused by the laptop resting on the bed. When the laptop was on the bed cooling fan did not get the air to cool the computer and that is what caused the fire. He did not even wake up to get out of the bed because he died of breathing in carbon monoxide.

The reason I am writing this to all of you is that I have seen many of us and also our sons & daughters using the laptop while in bed. Let us all decide and make it a practice not to do that. The risk is real. Let us make it a rule not to use the laptop on bed with blankets and pillows around. Please educate as many people as you can.

"Precaution is better than cure" (SF)

The game

2011-11-05T01:20:00.001+08:00

If you didnt hear your girl, don't pretend like you did. You will never win the game.

Otaku

2011-11-04T03:09:00.002+08:00

Otaku in japanese is used primarily to describe someone who is obsessed with something to the point of un-healthiness. They lose their grip on reality so to speak. 'Gun-Otaku,' one who is obsessed with guns. 'porn-otaku,' one obsessed with porn. so on and so forth. The american meaning, maybe its used else where to...I dunno. any way, otaku over here is someone who likes anime a wwhhoollee lot, though they normally lead a normal life (unlike jap. otaku). Not really a bad term, though many see it as such.

Joke

2011-10-31T12:58:00.001+08:00

Share a joke~

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always....

ហេតុអ្វីបានជាអ្នកហូរទឹកភ្នែកពេលស្ងាប?

2011-10-22T16:14:00.002+08:00

វាប្រហែលជាមិនកើតឡើងចំពោះមនុស្សគ្រប់រូបនោះទេ ប៉ុន្តែមនុស្សមួយចំនួនតែងតែហូរទឹកភ្នែកនៅពេលដែលពួកគេស្ងាប។ ហើយចំពោះអ្នកខ្លះវិញប្រហែលជាអាចមានករណីហូរទឹកភ្នែកនៅពេលដែល បត់ជើងធំ។ ករណីទាំងពីរនេះប្រហែលជាមានមូលហេតុដូចគ្នា។
តាមទ្រឹស្តី នៅពេលដែលអ្នកស្ងាបឬបត់ជើងធំ អ្នកនឹងបង្រួមសាច់ដុំមុខ។ ការកន្ត្រាក់នៃសាច់ដុំទាំងនេះអាចសង្កត់បំពង់និងក្រពេញទឹកភ្នែក ដែលបង្ខំឱ្យទឹកភ្នែកហូរចេញមក។
ទឹកភ្នែកបែងចែកចេញជាបីក្រុមធំៗគឺ៖ ទឹកភ្នែកខាងក្រោយ មានតួនាទីធ្វើឱ្យភ្នែកមានចលនាស្រួល, ប្រតិកម្មទឹកភ្នែក (ពេលប៉ះត្រូវចំហាយខ្ទឹមបារាំង), និងទឹកភ្នែករបស់អារម្មណ៍។

Most beautiful thing

2011-10-21T19:51:00.002+08:00

The Most Beautiful Thing In This WorLD

Is To See Your Parents Smiling & The Next Best ThinG

Is To Know That You Are The Reason Behind ThaT Smile

Bigger is better

2011-10-20T13:31:00.001+08:00

The 7 qualities for the perfect girlfriend:

Beautiful,
Intelligent,
Gentle,
Thoughtful,
Innocent,
Trustworthy,
Sensible.

The 7 qualities for the Ideal boyfriend:

Bold
Independent
Generous
Determined
Innovative
Charming
Kind

Laugh if you get what I meant

It happens

2011-10-20T07:59:00.003+08:00

Roti tulur can be served with susu.

How to bully your Muslim friend!

2011-10-13T00:37:00.001+08:00

1- wake up in the morning and get yourself well washed
2- eat bak yong with your right hand, and don't clean ur hand after eating,
3- go to class and shake hand with all your friends

The shit list

2011-10-11T12:44:00.001+08:00

Ghost Shit:
The kind of shit where you feel the shit come out, but there is no shit in the toilet.

Clean Shit:
The kind of shit where you shit it out, see it in the toilet, but when you wipe your ass there is nothing on the toilet paper.

Wet Shit:
The kind of shit where you wipe your ass so many times, and it feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper up your asshole so you will not ruin your underwear with a nasty shit stain.

2nd Wave Shit:
This happens when you are done shitting, pulled up your pants to your waist, and you have to shit some more.

Pop-a-Vein-in-Your-Head Shit:
The kind of shit where you strain so much to get it out that you practically have a stroke.

Lincoln Log Shit:
The kind of shit where it is so huge you are affraid to flush it without breaking it into small pieces with the toilet brush.

Gassy Shit:
The kind of shit so noisy, everyone in
hearing range is giggling.

The Dangling Shit:
The kind of shit that refuses to drop even though you are done shitting. You just pray that a shake or two will cut it loose.

Drinker Shit:
The kind of shit you have in the morning after a long night of drinking; the most noticible trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet bowl.

Corn Shit:
(Self Explanatory)

Gee-I-Wish-I-Could-Shit Shit:
The kind of shit where you want to shit so bad, but all you can do is sit on the toilet and fart a few times.

Spinal Tap Shit:
That is where it hurts so badly you could swear it was leaving your body sideways.

Wet Cheeks Shit (Power Dump):
The kind of shit that comes out so fast your ass gets splashed with water.

Mexican Shit:
The kind of shit that smells so bad your nose hairs burn off.

Upper Class Shit:
The kind of shit that comes out perfectly: doesn’t touch the bottom of the toilet, doesn’t smell, and defies all laws of shitting.

Liquid Shit:
The kind of shit where the yellow-brownish liquid shoots out of your asshole and splashes all over the toilet bowl.

The Never-ending Shit:
The kind of shit that you feel it come out, look into the toilet bowl, see the beginning, but never see the end.

Five-Alarm-Fire Shit:
This is when you take a Liquid Shit and it burns you asshole so badly that you want to take a 50 foot lawn hose, put it on full power and shove it all the way up your ass.

The Surprise Shit:
That is when you are not even at the toilet because you are sure that you have to fart, but oops ... a piece of shit.

I HOPE THIS MADE YOU SHIT OUT OF LAUGHTER

Plz don't copy

Did you know

2011-10-08T21:56:00.001+08:00

The animal with the largest brain in relation to its body is the ant.

Is it ???

2011-10-08T10:54:00.000+08:00

"Girls really don't mind you playing video games, but if there's something they really need to you about, you should give them undivided attention."

With this I believe DV will agree to certain extend, better the previous quote.

Tips

2011-10-04T20:03:00.001+08:00

The doc told Bob that masturbating before sex helped men last longer during the act.
Bob reckoned, "What the hell, I'll give it a try." So, he spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it. He couldn't do it in his office. He thought about the restroom, but that was too open. He considered an alley, but figured that was too unsafe. Finally, he realized a solution.

On his way home, he pulled his pick-up truck over on the side of the highway. He got out and crawled underneath as if he was examining the truck.

Satisfied with the privacy, he undid his pants and started stroking his penis.

He closed his eyes and thought of the gorgeous girl who lived next door. As he grew closer to orgasm, he felt a quick tug at the bottom of his pants. Bob didn't want to lose his mental fantasy or the orgasm, so he kept his eyes shut, replying, "What?"

He heard, "This is the police. What's going on down there?"

Bob replied, "I'm checking out the rear axle, it's busted."

The officer replied, "Well, you should check your brakes while you're down there because your truck rolled down the hill five minutes ago."

Like if you laugh..

Fun time reading

2011-10-03T11:25:00.001+08:00

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS:-
-Smart man + smart woman = romance.
-Smart man + dumb woman = affair.
-Dumb man + smart woman = marriage.
-Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy.
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OFFICE ARITHMETIC:-
-Smart boss + smart employee = profit.
-Smart boss + dumb employee = production.
-Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion.
-Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime.
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SHOPPING MATH:-
-A man will pay
N2000 for a N1000 item he needs.
-A woman will pay N1000 for a
N2000 item that she doesn't need.
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GENERAL EQUATIONS &STATISTICS:-
-A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
-A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
-A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
-A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
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HAPPINESS:-
-To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
-To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
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LONGEVITY:-
-Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
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PROPENSITY TO CHANGE:-
-A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
-A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
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DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE:-
-A woman has the last word in any argument.
-Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.