Life!!!

I wish ....

2015-07-10T11:48:00.002-07:00

I wish you were here,
beside me around my arms,
your body leaning against mine,
head resting under my chin

I wish you were here,
for that beautiful good morning
that first cup of coffee
and warm smile thereafter

I wish you were here
every time I crossed the road
holding hands tightly
looking over each others shoulders

I wish you were here
with your endless stories
stories of a parallel world
stories to fill the empty evenings

I wish you were here,
to spice up the Sunday noon,
to excite the evening walks
and the rains would have been better,

I wish you were here,
for the walk back home
for the last bite of the cone
for the last bye of the night

Life....

2014-09-12T02:47:00.004-07:00

time has flown by
and the black heads greyed
memories tolling up the mind
life has been a one way lane

the good the bad and the summers
have lived all the same
walking down the paths set long ago
learned and free yet reined and tamed

every evening returning back to the den
a day old but a decade aged
they say it's the chemicals acting
but deep down it's the alienation at work

I fancy meeting you somewhere,some time
you taking a moment to recognize me
the locks in your hair have gone grey
as the thing between you and me

The feeble cry pinches the ear
about an arm's length small
yet somehow it is supposed to rise
to live and fight, to love and to carry on

The Journey

2014-07-07T07:58:00.003-07:00

The grey shades of my hollow past
getting me down to the dark roads
clutching me tightly around my neck
the dementors of my past feed upon me

I have been running away from them
running away from the demons within
looking for the faintest ray of light
plotting my escape from this purgatory

That golden beacon of light is too far
filtering through the prism of cobwebs
I can feel the warmth it spreads
The many colors dancing on my skin

A new morning has filled up the canvas
and with it I continue my run
for the bright light that guides me
and keeps the creatures in hiding

I have waited a long time now
the winged angel is yet to come
the hours have taken away my faith
All I see is a light within

The wind has started to feel pleasant
The road ahead seems smooth enough
I do not fear the road ahead
for I just need to keep moving

Sometimes

2014-05-13T05:15:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I sit by my window
head resting against the sill
looking at the blank outside
rummaging the void within

Sometimes I just walk away
running off the normal day
and in those moments a few
I find myself thinking about you

Sometimes I just talk to myself
debating and discussing in silence
the things to say,the things to do
if ever I stay sober in front of you

Sometimes I picture you with me
walking down the road together
you rest you head on my heart
I have held you close by my side

Sometimes I forget who I am
lost everytime I see you smiling
your casual brushing your hair aside
makes me smile blankly everytime

Sometimes I wish all this was real
Us holding hands,you smiling at me
I wish you could see through me
come to me and be mine truly

A cup of tea with the hostile neighbours

2014-04-03T00:15:00.001-07:00

Well this happened last month when I had gone to home tutor a child. It was a one-time thing, as a friend of mine insisted me to go in his place. The address was in the worst area of Jankipuram and throughout the journey I was cursing that friend and praying for my Activa’s tire. Soon the hell ride ended as I reached the address and was greeted with a pleasing smile. I was asked to sit and the student came and we were off to books the next minute.

A few moments later, the student’s mother came in carrying a tray of tea and snacks. Now I am not a great fan of tea and I avoid it as much as possible. I won’t deny I have not drunk it but only a handful of times. So to be polite and gathering all the manners that my mother had taught me I told her I do not drink tea. She insisted and in the same gentle tone I refused the offer again. She on the other hand took this the other was round and said and I quote,” SIR KYA HINDU – MUSLIM KI WAJAH SE NAHI PEE RAHE KYA?”

I was shocked and felt electrocuted in my seat. Her this reply had left in a rage nonetheless speechless. I was in so much anger and agony that words would definitely fail to do justice with my feelings. For a minute or so I failed to manage a reply and in the end just settled for a lame shake of my head. Sheepishly, I tried to convince her that it was not the issue but all I could think of was leaving that place as soon as possible and I would have left had it not been my word to keep.

Of all the things that those words made me feel, I felt humiliated the most. I didn’t know from where she came or which world she lived in but I sure knew her thinking was unhealthy. It was an insult, not only mine but of all those principles of equality that this country is built upon.

What I fail to grasp is the fact that it has been 66 years of independence, 66 years of co-existence and we still have people dating back to the stone ages. And this is just the years after independence, not counting the fact that Hindus and Muslims have been living together for centuries. Centuries we have come together, grown together and walked together but still the hostility remains. Here I want to clarify that this attitude is shown by both the sides. I have seen my Muslim friends/elders displaying this sick notion. I too have been advised by some blatant person to be responsible towards my religion and not mingle with people outside it

There are people who would always be ready with stories of atrocities done by the other side and thus futily try to convince you to hate the other lot. I say why keep digging the past? What good could come by keeping the skeletons in the closet? No one denies there have been horrible and tragic events but should we stop there and make it our mission to brood over it? To harvest hate in the minds of our young ones that they become suicidal for the society? Or should we work together and help the man next to us get over the trauma and step ahead to a more successful future.

I would sign of with the words of my physics teacher Kavita ma'am

"Syed do something constructive than just sitting around and talking "!

I walk alone....

2014-02-05T11:42:00.000-08:00

I walk alone
amidst this sea
of flesh and limbs
walking with blindfolds
crawling beside me

there are faces
and faces on faces
there are no masks
just smiles to decieve
and promises to kill

i live in my burrow
fretting and petrified
the walls closing around
i stare at the light above
staring at the trove of colours

the darkness stares at me
blankly I search myself
for the reflection can lie
the void is like a mirror
the pensive for soul

They are the multitudes
the omnious off growth of mind
they are different,yet united
they are hollow inside
yet they have the loudest voice

i walk alone
surrounded by a crowd
of dreams and pride
of unsung heroes and lives
i see the lights dimming
as i turn and walk away....

Love

2013-11-26T14:33:00.002-08:00

I didn't ask for a thousand words dear
Nor did I want to always stay near
I never asked the long starry walks
All I wanted were our little talks

I didn't ask for a grand story
Or a spectacle befitting a jury
Never did I ask for rings or bands
I liked our walking hands in hands

I never urged for an expensive gift
I didn't ask for the surprise mood lift
But I cross my heart when I say this
Life with you has been eternal bliss

I never called for a cuddle or a hug
I never needed a proof of your care
For I knew that in times of despair
By my side always,You would be here

All I asked, was a smile from you
Bright as a sun,fresh as morning dew
All I wished, was the twinkle of your eye
All I wanted,was to be yours when I die

Death....

2013-11-16T10:51:00.003-08:00

O death! why are you here,
standing tall in your black hood?
spreading cold shivers and chills
darkening every spot you stood?

cold and harsh and full of void
snapping the colours from life
you come silently riding your high stead
plunging everything into an empty darkness

that woman you took away
was the soul of her house
with her around,the family was one
now they are just beads broken

the son sits like a stone, burning inside
while the little daughters cry and faint
for she was their anchor in sorrow
and in happiness the colours of their paints

O death! don't you look at their faces
the faces on whom she would put a smile
can't you see the tears flowing
down the very eyes she loved

"I took her,for I had to"
he said removing the long hood
"for there has to be an end to a start
and for every start there should be an end"

my existence is a masquerade
I am not the devil O mortal!
for your dear life is a journey
and I am merely the destination

you fear me,you curse me
but tell me what wrong have I done
I bring peace to the troubled souls
I take them back smiling, as friends

Let's....

2013-10-12T13:31:00.000-07:00

Let's wake up and make it true

the dream that we had

Let's light up the skies alike

with the sparks burning in our hearts

Let's walk down the road undiscovered

walking underneath skies new

Let's flow like a stream unbounded

thrashing away the boulders in our path

Let's work together sweat alike

beyond the borders,leaving languages behind

for the grains that hold together

are seldom disturbed by the mighty winds

Let's grow up together start up new

like a phoenix from it's ashes

leaving old failures behind

rising from the fire within

Let's hold hands and walk together

underneath the firelit sky

for when you feel the morning dew

be ready to shine on in a morning new...

something-rubbish-that-i-do-not-care-to-name

2013-08-27T11:57:00.000-07:00

.LOG
Dhaani woke up with a jolt and sat upright,she could see Veeru lying beside her. sumthing dark and shining was scattered around his arm and his once handsome,smiling face was filled with bruises,cuts and blood.
She could barely believe all that had happened through out the day,everything seemed to be like a dream,a dreadfull one but it was all true. She had faced it
. Only a few hours had passed when she had decided to end her life and now she is fighting for it. The only difference is now she has Veeru by her side,and that meant everything.
She tried to get up and realised she could not move. She tried to move her hands but failed. Something was tying her back,she looked around and realised her hands aere chained and legs were tied together. She could not see what it was,the dim light from the lantern was not helping. Dhani struggled her hands and legs,but nothing help. The grip didnt loose,instead doing so she had scratched her wrist.
The reality of the situation struck to her. the color of her face drained as she realised what lay ahead and these brought tears to her eyes. They were rare,her tears. Dhaani's father had made it a mission that his daughter wont ever cry. 'the poor soul has already lost her mother,nothing would steal her smile again'.

"Veeru! wake up! wake up shona,wake up" she mumbled shaking Veeru's unconcious body. As her hands slid past his left shoulder,she felt something warm and fluid. Terrified, she brought her fingers near her and looked closely. It was blood. This was getting worse.

Stray thoughts of what worse could happen next frightened her.Scared and afraid,her body shuddering she started shaking him vigourously,uttering inaudible prayers,calling every God she could summon for help. In between,talking to him,pleading him not to leave her alone. It was taking all her strength to wake him up. And like every miracle,it also happened when all the hope had been lost. Just when her strength was failing her Veeru stirred. It was like her heart skipped a beat. Wiping her tears off,she started patting his head lightly,carefull enough not to hurt any of the injuries,muttering the promises they had made to each other,the names she used to call him. She whispered everything and anything he loved,even sang for him and her spirits rose higher as Veeru stirred again. although still in a lot of pain due to that bullet wound,he was carrying. A few long tense minutes had passed when he opened his eyes.
"Veeru!?! Veeru can u hear me? can......can u see me?"she said looking him into the eyes.
He tried to speak but instead spat out blood, the laathi wounds had broken most of his jaw. All he could do was nod;that nod meant everything to her.

He raised his other arm and touched her face,wiped out the tears. She never looked good crying. But this didn't comfort her,instead pained by his condition she started to cry harder.
01:10 17-11-2012
"Why are you crying stupid? What's there to cry in it?"he asked her,spitting out words as slowly as he could.
But the tears were enough for Dhaani to speak,they choked her throat and when she tried to speak,all she could gather was a hiccup.
"What was that? Did u just say ' I LOVE YOU'? did you?"he asked,trying to force a smile. This made Dhaani give up sobbing and a weak smile crossed her face. She quickly wiped her eyes as they obstructed her vision.
"How are you feeling? Does it hurts??"she asked sobbing.
"It does" he replied "but you know what can cure it?"
"wh..wh..what?"she asked nervously.
"this"and saying it he threw the bunch of hairs off her face. She was completely off guard and smiled shyly at this gesture. "just this smile,I don't care what happens to us next". His words rose her hope high.
It was after a couple of odd silent moments that she finally found the courage and spilled the question she dreaded the most "Veeru what do you think they will do to us?"
But this was the one thought he was avoiding. He had seen that they meant to kill,even had faced death moments afar. But here they were alive and this troubled him more. Either something worse was going to happen them or they were free,something which was out of question.
'What could be worse than death?',he thought and the answer came to him as soon as the question. He shrugged it away,realising how insecure and unpredictably dangerous was their future.
"Well for sure they won't marry us?"he said "we have already done that,by the way where you want the reception to take place?"
"Vee....ru...."was all she could say and suddenly started to smile. An effortless smile swept her face spreading warmth.
She didn,t need to worry. Her man was there for her. His presence was enough for her.

20:51 18-11-2012

04:05 24-12-2012
II
The mood in the lawn was going gloomier by the second. Chaos and blabbers were increasing but still that didn't effect the man sitting on the wooden chair under the shed. Sardara Singh alias 'chaudhary sahab' was sitting in his age old chair under the shed of his porch,deeply lost in himself. He was a man to go by book,who took correct decisions at coorect time and got the best results. His 20 years tenure as the 'mukhiya' of the village was a validation of his excellence. It was the first time he didn't know what to do.
His mind was fighting a debate with itself,he knew the answer and still he was on cross-roads.
'They have commited a crime'he thought 'But they are role models,pioneers' and soon enough another clause disturbed him 'if left unpunished,it would start a trend,and what message would it give? that he is weak?'

He lighted a ciggerate,to calm his racing mind but it he knew tobacco won't help him here.
"If you don't mind,sir,may I listen your thoughts",Tiwari his accountant and child-hood friend spoke.
" I dont know Gopal,I can't settle on a single thought"
"Well then I would suggest to speak them out and then sort them"Tiwari advised
Sardara stood up and started walking into his study,Tewari followed him behind.
" I love them as my own children"he said "I am really proud of them,the only doctors from all the 10 neighbouring villages."
"I know that Sardara,but they have broken an eternal law. They have crossed all levels of morality" Tewari replied " A run away marriage,that too inter caste! how ashamed our ancestors would be?"

"I am aware of that"he said hanging his head low.
04:32 12-05-2013
"I think you know what to do tau ji"
Sardara and dashrath turned around to see jaspal singh,sardara's neice an orphan but the only heir of their ancestory walk in.
"you should learn to knock before coming in" sardara scolded.
"Yes tau ji, I am sorry",he said carelessly"but uncle u do know what to do,i always told u not to let that wretched bastard go to school leave alone college".
"What is your point",dashrath interrupted his neice. He always disliked that boy .
"I think that if that girl would not have ever gone to college,she would not have ever brought down such shame on our village".
"sending her to college was not my decision"sardara raised his voice,"it was her father's and it was the best decision to make"
"But don't u see how now she has defamed his name. stained the family honour"jaspal was too loosing control"if only u had tied that bitch back to the village pole,she would not have dared to run away with that pig"
"enough! enough of this non sense! "sardara said raising his hand. He didn't shout. He rarely did it. "The girl u called a bitch is much more educated and human than u drinking guter snipe"
" U have soft corner for them"he snarled" U won't punish them would u? U r not man enough to face them,wait till the panchayat learns it. U r a goner old man"
"I am man enough to throw a whoring addict like u out of this place. " He raised his hand and pointed at him"get out before i really loose my temper"
Jaspal could not take more. He had an urgent urge to hit some one real hard.And right now he just knew who it would be Breathing anger he stormed out of the room.
"You should be carefull around him,temper like him"tiwari said with a worried face.
"he is nothing but a disgrace."he sighed" i know he wont bite back"
"Well talking about disgrace,I think both of us have our share now"
Sardara walked towards the table and sat on the nearby chair.
"It's not him i fear but his words."he spoke after a long pause. His brow was engraved with deep lines." I fear this is going to be the general response"
"My friend I also fear so."Gopal said walking beside him "But i think hardly any one would say anything aloud"
He leaned back in his chair " pray sit here old friend"he motioned him to sit "power is a pretty awful thing,you have to trade it for your emotions and opinions. All that matters is doing the right thing or following our ancestors"

1:06 AM 5/29/2013
It was 4 years ago,when the state medical results declared when Veeru first saw Dhaani,precisely her photograph in the newspaper. She was the one of the three students who had qualified the exam from their city;Veeru was one of the other two. It was love at first sight.Althogh the photograph was not clear but those subtle brown eyes had made his senses fall. He gazed at her photograph,tracing every part of her face. Starting from her those beautifull perfectly shaped brown eyes that had the frshness of the morning dew in them and still managet to entice an unknown passion in him. He just loved them,them and the perfectly arched eye brows over them. It was just like out of some poetry. Moving from her eye brows to the tip of her nose and then sliding onto her lips. He spent a couple of odd mnutes just imagining how beautifull those lips would look in real,smiling just for him. A shy smile crossed his face,he was feeling something new ,something he had just read about in books. The way she carried all her hair on her left shoulder and those few hair that covered her right ear took his breath away. He kept on admiring her beauty like this for a long time and every time he thought it was enough something again got her attention,something else that was beautifull in her and was ready to be explored. After what seemed hours he finally gave it a last glance and put the news paper back again on the table.
'one day i would find her,and make her mine'he thought and went out to meet others who had come to congratulate him.

By evening time he was tired of explaining people that he was not a doctor yet,he was just admitted in a college but the simple villagers didn't listened.
"mubarak ho daaktar babu,khoob naam rausan kiyo hamaar sabka"cried an elderly women who had just come.
"arree amma pota bhi to tuhaar he hain",he replied touching her feet.
"oo rajjanwa ki bitiya bhi paas hui hai ka?"she spoke curtly in his ear.
"kaun amma"
"arree wahi kalmunhi Rani? Chalat to badi ainthan me hai jaise wahi kaabil hai"she said "arree aurat jaat bhi kabhi daakatary padhe hai"
"nahi amma,aisan to kauno naam nhi rhe akhbaar me"he replied. For a moment he thought of some possiblity but then he thought that the women was old enough for her brain to work properly.
"laagat rahe jhoot bolat hai. chamaar jaat hi neech howat hai"she smirked and moved in the house.
He stood perplexed,he would have to treat her first when he became a neurologist.
His train of thoughts was broken by the enterance of the sarpanch Sardara singh.
"Pranaam tau ji",he said bending low and touching his feet.
"aayushmaan bhavo"he blessed,pulling him up and embracing him in a tight warm hug."you have made all of us proud son,live longer than the sun"
"tau ji! now you are embarrasing me"he replied
"always the same !! modest and shy. I wish I had a son like you"SArdara's voice was filled with joy.
"am i not your son? do u take me as a stranger"Veeru asked softly.
"you are my son, and for my son I have brought the best gift i could find." saying this he produced a small packet"open it"
Like a small kid Veeru took the packet and opened it. It was a watch." It's gold plated tau ji,It's too exponsive! How can i have this?'Veeru said hesitantly.
"You are like my son and i want u to have it. isn't that reason enough??"he replied with a smile.
A silent "thanks" was all he could muster,nothing else was required.
2:48 AM 6/7/2013
Evening came early for Veerendra Tiwari,surrounded by all those who came to congratulate him or had called to convey their wishes to him. He had just ended a phone call from a distant uncle whom he had never seen and had entered the verandah when he heard someone.
"Enjoying all the lime light aren't you?"
Veeru turned around to find it was his father.
Gopal Tiwari,his father, was the son of the head priest of the village and had dreamt of his only son taking up that position. He was thoroughly bothered when he heard about his son's plan to study science. But his best friend and the sarpanch, Sardara had supported him. He could not argue with both of them but he never accepted him as his son ever.
"baba! i have told you a hundred times, I was born to be a doctor! Why don't you get that?"he got irritated by the taunt in Gopal's voice.
"I wonder why were you even born! That disgrace of your mother could not have produced anything better"he retorted.
"BABA!!"veeru lost control of his voice," I AM WARNING YOU,you don't talk about my mother like that"
"hurt you did I?"he smirked,"well she also knew how to throw a tantrum"
"Why her baba?,I am half you also and I don't feel very good from your side, infact i am ashamed that I even carry you name"he replied as he left out of the house,leaving Gopal staring at him helplessly.

2:28 AM 6/13/2013
It was getting dark when Veeru started to walk back home. The evening satrs were visible indicating the end of the day. The local tea stalls were buzzing with labour's back from their work,sitting with a cup of tea and discussing the mundeane issues surrounding their simple lives. He could see lamps being lit and hung outside home and mothers dragging their children back home. The older kids were parading their parents off the fields ,mostly carrying fire wood on thier heads.
Somewhere in distance he could listen a radio playing,and a crowd gathered around it,mostly youngsters waiting to listen the latest bollywood songs. He liked radio. It was like the lifeline of these people,the only source of entertainment. He remembered how a huge crowd sat together,listening to a match broadcast,living every word as if watching it themselves. He would be frequently called up whenever the commentary was in english. The elders never missed the late evening news which would officially mark the end of the day. People would be back in their homes,the whole famile ate together;males first,and then went to sleep. It was a simpler life here and he loved it.
"Beeru oye! listen up",he heard some one call his name and turned around to look. It was Ramzan,his childhood friend.
"Everyone's been waiting for you"he was panting too hard to speak clearly "hurry now! run along or you would be left behind as always" and he started to run again.
And it did the trick. For he was smiling now. He knew that if there was something that could chher him up was the man running next to him. Ramzan Ali was the fifth child of his parents from a total of seven. Forced to live in the poverty and desperation as a child,he had found relief in the company of Veerendra Tiwari. Both the boys were of same age and hit off together were they were in kinder garden. Sadly,due to his family's conditions Ramzan had to drop out from school,but the bond grew stronger. They were inseparable and were always seen together. Veeru would tell him all that he learnt at school while Ramzan would tell stories of working with his father as a weaver. Veeru knew most of them were made up but he never complained because they were vey beautifully weaved up. No matter what was thrown in their way but the boys passed every hurdle,for all the jokes hurled at their mental compatibility,their religious differences ,the boys moved on and cherished their friendship.

1:24 AM 6/16/2013
Jaspal was filled with anger as he rushed towards the cellar. The earlier insult had furiated him to an extent that he was going mad with anger. He was the only heir of the family and still he was treated like any commoner. He was above them all,born to rule but his uncle always mistreated him,always underestimated his potentials. His intentions were always in question,his schemes rejected even though they were more profitable. All his plans were rejected in the name of honour.
'Honour! what honour does that old hag finds in spitting on his own blood'he thought. The way he talked to him moments ago was as one talks to his slave. The old man always stood in his way to rise,pulling him down whenever possible. He was so over with impressing him,now he wanted to show him that he was not tob taken lightly. It was to hurt the old man in such a way that he would take ages to recover and the reign would fall in his hands. Call it luck or fate,he just had every thing in mind about what to do.
Heavy pounding footsteps broke their trance.A look of horror struck Dhaani's face,she could sense something was not right. Veeru, although pretending to be calm was trying to make out how many men were coming towards them,he guesssed 3.
"open this shit up",he heard Jaspal's voice coming from the other side of the door.
"Chhote saab u r not to go in there",a voice creaked."chaudhary saab himself asked me to stand watch"
"you mean to say that you are standing here,guarding these peice of shits"he chuckled,anger flowing under his words"what are u afraid will happen to them?? They are already dead. Heaven's have sealed their faith,but don't make me write yours"
In one fluid movement he threw the man guarding the door on his feets,blood gushing through his head he stormed through the cellar gate.
A jolt of ahock ran across their bodies to see Jaspal standing there with three of his men.
"how are you son of a bitch?",he spat on the floor "I find henious to even take your eveil name"
"is that so,or you don;t know how to spell"Dhaani retorted "it goes like this Dr.Veerrr........."
The slap was so severe that it left an impression on her cheek "shut up whore"he shouted.
"Jassu!! don't you dare hurt her again!" Veeru shouted on the top of his voice. His heart had started pumping harder,fits of anger took over him. He staggered and fell back on the floor as he tried to stand.
"seems u have grown some balls these days,did it pain?"he laughed looking at him.
"seems you have not grown ever since u were 5,hope that hurt"Veeru replied loosing his temper. He tried furiosly to stand but each time he failed.
"Feeling heroic? let me give u some action"hesaid in a slow whisper"hold him up"
The three men with him grabbed him by shoulders and lifted him up.
"you know what is funny,"he said with a smirk,"that you are a doctor but i know a hell more than u when it comes to hurt".
And with htis he landed a low punch on Veeru's rib cage. It hurt like hell. With all his bones battered already every next blow on them hurt him like molten lead flowing through them and he screamed ever so loudly.
"What was that?"Jaspal said laughing,he was enjoying this "did u say u want more!"
With every blow the pain increased,it was nothing like he had fealt ever. His screams grew more painfull and when she can't stand it anymore she started to cry out loudly.
"leave him"she shouted,tears rolling down her cheeks"for god's sake leave him alone,what has he done to you"
"stop barking bitch,you are next and start praying coz when i am done with beating the hell out of him i will salvage you and God help me I wont stop until I have destroyed your disgracefull soul itself"he shouted as another of his panch fell on Veeru's abdomnen. Madness had taken over him,he was too blood thirsty to stop. He was enjoying it. Adrenaline taking the good of him,he had lost all his senses and was blindly throwing punches at the broken structure of Veerendra. All he cared was to thrash him as hard as he did previously and have his revenge.
It was a nightmare for her,all her tears had dried up and yet she was crying. Pleading him to stop hurting her love. She went begging on her knees to each of the three men but they all kicked and insulted her.One of the men hit straight on her face but when she tried to shout she could not,her voice was drained off,all she could muster was a murmur . Her kajal had spread because of her crying and now formed line running down from her eyes to her cheeks.The tears had left their own marks on her face,eyes read from crying over and over. when she could not stand it anymore she passed out.

3:02 AM 6/16/2013
She didn't knw how long had she been out but when she opened her eyes she saw Veeru being thrashed by Jaspal. The poor boy had turned into unrecognisable pile of flesh. She could take it no more,gathering all her strengths she stood up and threw her hands On Jaspal with all her might from behind. for a moment he was taken my surprise but the next moment he went wild .
"Hold this bitch'she needs a lesson"he growled and waved at his men who abided his command"put her here so that he sees what i am going to do with her. I guess they didn't teach you how to fuck at college,did they?"
If she was terrified before this horrified her beyond her measures. Had she heard him correctly? And a loud shriek left her as she realised the truth of his words.
"This slut seems excited"jaspal said spitting on her "hold her tight,she might get wild in the beginning but then she would enjoy as she did with others".
Dhaani had lost sense of everything,she tilted her head and saw veeru lying on the floor,a single tear rested on his cheek. It was like a dam had broken in her as a fresh stream of tears flowed silently across her eyes.
"Let me go please"she cried,"i beg of you please let me go! show some mercy"
"Mercy! and to a whore like you? you know what a scandal you did? when they thought they were sending you to college you went whoring around every boy you could. Faking love and that too with a oonchi jaat brahmin!! u would be damned like this in hell too" saying this he ripped of her blouse.
Throwing every ounce of power she could to resist,tears rolled down her cheeks on the floor of hte cellar.
"Please don't do this,Let me go" was all she could muster but the monster went on tearing apart her cloths. Slapping and kicking evry inch of his body she could lay her hands upon she fought with all her might. and the she felt an unbearable pain and cried out loud but her cry was shadowed by Jaspal's high pitched laughter. She wriggled under him,trying to get off but it all failed. Minutes later she passed out again. It was pain she could not imagine,flaming like fire in her,burning her down it was more than she could have handled.
When she woke up she could not see clearly as her tears clouded her vision but she saw Jaspal adjusting his pants, a bile of anger rose in her as she souted at him "done with me are you mother fucker!!! you coward son of a bitch"
Jaspal did not loose his temper this time,he merely smiled "She wants more. Any volunteer?"
It was as if they were waiting for the signal when they leapt forward. Jaspal laughed at this," see bitch? you are the best whore around",then he turned to one of the men "you! go enjoy her" and then he sat down.
Dhani started shouting at the top of her voice and tried to get up but failed. All the men started laughing but then Veeru launched himself on that man. This took every one by surprise and left jaspal furiated.
"You two keep on beating him while he enjoys her. He seems to have forgotten the lesson"
The man advanced over Dhaani and started kissing her over but then there was a loud bang and the next moment that man lay on the floor. Dead. Chaudhary Sardara Singh was standing at the door ,his rifle aimed at where that man was before. Hius eyes were glaring ,face clearly showing his temper.
"What the hell is going on in here" he said as he stepped in. It happened so that the gate keeper had ran off to inform Sardara of Jaspal's entry.
"Tau ji i was just teaching them a lesson,Just tamin..........."he had not finishe dwhen Chaudhary slapped hi hard rith across his left cheek. Silence fell across the room,the two men thrashing Veeru stood dead.
2:56 AM 7/28/2013

12:26 AM 8/28/2013

a whatever of my life

2012-10-23T13:31:00.001-07:00

I was born as they say,
on a foggy January Sunday.
Dug up from the depths of cave,
shouting like a warrior brave.
i was passed hand to hand,
held aloft like a trophy grand

seventeen days had passed to my registry,
when i fell fr the nature's trickery
i was so ill as if i would die,
and the mounds of nappies rose high and high.
but God be praised,i was saved,
everyone's prayers were well paid

soon i learned things a few,
that the toy wont bite you.
In front of the lady u should always cry,
for she would love you and lift you high.
But beware of the small girl,
always bickering,sulky and dull

i set upon journeys new,
tottering to discover every hue.
I fell,i collapsed and i cried,
but set off before the tears had dried.
Fighting and conquering everything that came,
mind it was no child's game.,,......

As i grew life went on,
lyk an unhindered stream
destination unknown,flowing a dream
experience guiding it to the dawn
wat would happen next was unknown,
a journey i had to complete myself bt not alone

Lucky enough,i was baptised in an institution,
another soul living others ambition
screwed and polished with others of kin
and the system took us all in
Strong or weak,fast or slow all studied there
asking silently everyday am i here'

the caravan moved ahead,
with or without me,nobody cared
lyf became easier on many parts
fr Friends had taken the sail,
she had smiled wen we exchanged our hearts
bt love was a storm of hail

v didn't knew what fate had in store
unknown of wat may strike the door
v lived dis world in a world of ours
the world was another unit living fr themselves
fr v didn't lie on grass or stared the stars
but dreamt to dream about ourselves

one odd day the caravan stopped,
its an illusion i had hoped,
but the realty struck hard,
fr the toughest eyes were raining down tears,
standing on the crossroads,thinking about the past,
i walk ahead,staring at the lost mast.

untitled

2012-10-22T11:25:00.002-07:00

that was the last road i knew
of all the ones that hadn't been tried
i walked towards that faint hue
because walking meant i hadn't died

i could see the train whistle away,
its voice as faint as my heartbeat
it was dead,shunting alike each dayi
i was alive with hope for a destiny to meet

the sky was getting darker,the stars bright
without a mentor,without a godfather
i did things the way they seemed right
with heart by my side, i walked farther

i sensed her walking beside me and i looked
face covered in a mask,a robe too old
"i am luck" she said and smiled
take me and you will bathe in gold

and in an instant she vanished
a girl stood there,lovely as none
it was tempting and i was nearly famished
but something said she wasn't the one

i have walked far to b tired
the sand cuts my heels deeper
searching all the way from start
the answers to "what if's" and "what will's"

A thousand goodbye's unattended
A thousand smiles un returned
A thousand words unsaid
I remember them all as i move on

i can feel the gate dead ahead
alone i started alone i am
the colorful soap bubbles as friends
will they burst when i am dead???

mY scHOol My liFe

2012-10-22T11:20:00.002-07:00

I remembr the day i enterd here,
full of xctement and a little fear.
"ths is it!!!"my heart said;
its euphoria gripd me,toe to head.
when the day ended, i had sum frnds dear;
i was happy and loved to be here.

Frm draging of feets to battling for seats;
frm chalk fight to sneaking into exam sheets;
ths is where u and life meet
frm bangng on chair;
to playng truth and dare;
ths is my skul and my heaven was here

the bunkng of periods, the sleepng in class
oh! I am going to mis it alas!
Her first luk,the frst stare
frm imitatng teachers to hot gossip affairs
i am going to mis ths place,my heart lies here!

Here i discovrd myself, i made frndz
the journey which startd,i hope,never ends
frm weird hairstyles to crazy beards
frm tears to gosip evrythng we shared!
The ground,the buildng,the clases the air
i wil never forgt it,i made my lyf here

Now,when i am levng ths place, my eyes r wet
mind ful of memries,i wont forget
it kils me to thnk that i am leavng ths place
fr smthng stpid,filthy rat chase
my soul's wounded, my heart's bare
bt its gona be with me coz i lvd my life here

friends et al....

2012-10-22T11:08:00.002-07:00

while walking along the narrow stream,
i was lost in thots of u;
conjured by my daydream,
i thot abt our times of smile and rue;

tired of walkng,i sat on its banks,
lukng at the water flowng by;
a wave eruptd and then it sank,
revealing in the ripples ur face,smiling and shy

then sumthng broke my stare,
lazily i lukd at it,my senses nt agile;
the sparklng water was castng its glare,
i laughd feebly as i remembrd ur smile......

In the water i noticd a leaf flowing,
swirling with it jumping and bumping,
evrytime the water tried to swallow it,it escaped,
stil movng on its ride,enjoyng
the leaf was like you, always jolly and smiling,
wateva the situation was,fighting bt stil laughing ...

to be contd......