My Life... in a Blog.

Breast is Best - Long & Gross but OH SO IMPORTANT

2012-05-08T19:38:00.002-05:00

With Devin, I only breastfed him for 4 months. That's when I realized I wasn't producing enough milk (mainly because I didn't know the importance of a hearty diet and excessive water consumption). At around 2 months old, we thought he was "colicky". He stayed "colicky" until 4 months, when I realized he was just hungry :( I was very sad. I wanted to breastfeed him until he was 6-8 onths at least. I felt guilty about quitting for almost a year after. At the time, I didn't know there was such a thing as relactation, or that having a healthier diet would make a difference, so, I just stopped.

With Emmy, I knew I would have a hard time with breastfeeding. Not because I wasn't armed with knowledge - I was. Since Devin, I have researched an enormous amout of info on the topic. I was very well-prepared, and determined to stick it out this time.

December 2010 - I noticed a lump in my left breast that never went away. I had it looked at many times. I knew it was infected (bright green pus coming out of my nipple was a dead giveaway). I was on antibiotics almost constantly for almost 5 months, and it never got better. Around May 2011, it became less bothersome (mainly because I was more preoccupied with finishing nursing school), so I let it fly under the radar for awhile. Then, I got pregnant in July. By the time I had my first prenatal appointment in September, the lump had gotten bigger, so I had my OB look at it. He decided we would continue to monitor it. So, at every single visit, I took my top off and had Lefty poked and prodded, because it just kept getting bigger. In December 2011, it started to hurt, so January 3rd, 2012, we did another sonogram on it. January 25th, we attempted to drain the abcess in office. We could not get any fluid out of it, just some more pus. It was the next day my preterm labor started, so we had to hold off on messing with my boob anymore for the time being.

March 25th - Lefty busted open on its' own. It hurt so bad, but the pressure was somewhat gon since I expressed all of the pus.. but the lump was still there. Possibly a cell wall, my OB said. We'd look into it more after delivery.

April 5th- Emmalyn was born. Yay! Now we can look at my boob that still had a gaping hole in it). Negative. Let's establish breastfeeding and bonding first.

April 12th - Lefty busted open again, in the same spot. Not just pus this time. Lots of blood, for days. Go to the ER the next day (4/13), they send me home without so much as a pain pill.

Weeks drag on as I try to get in to see the surgeon I was referred to. I had to change my primary care provider with my insurance *10* times (no exaggeration).

April 26th - FINALLY! I get to see the surgeon. He takes one look at the hole in my boob (that is now bigger AND has a chunck of tissue the size of a pencil eraser coming out of it) and says we'll do surgery ASAP. I went in for an ultrasound at the radiology dept the next day (4/27). Follow up appt Tuesday, May 1st. Surgery on Wednesday, May 2nd. The surgeon warned me that I might be losing an extensive amount of breast tissue; that I wouldn't be able to breastfeed on that breast for a long time during healing, but possibly never again. I just didn't realize how bad it was really going to be until we removed the surgical dressing the next day.

Milk running out of the hole....

Side view....

Inside... The hole started out being "L" shaped, and about 6-7 inches in length. My middle finger would easily fit inside the hole.

That was the 1st day post op. It's already healing quite nicely, but I still have a long way to go. I have dressing changes twice a day, where it has to be packed full of gauze. It's really pretty gross. And I'm very angry about this for many reasons, but the main two are:

1) Why didn't anyone take the time to treat me before it got to this point? I know different doctors tried antibiotics, I know we monitored it, but OBVIOUSLY it was getting bigger and worse, so someone should've tried something else. And considering I already have a personal history of cancer... someone should've done something ALOT sooner.

2) I cannot breastfeed my little girl. Since the day she was born, I was nursing her off of Righty only. That was hard all by itself. But because of the surgery, and all the pain meds, I can't even feed her off of that one anymore. I did make it until she was 3 1/2 weeks old. But then, it got to where every time I nursed ger or even just fed her breastmilk in a bottle, she threw it all right back up. I was afraid the infection had spread, and that's why she was getting sick. I couldn't risk getting her sick. So I stopped nursing 2 days before the surgery. I was cleared to nurse her on the right side now, but she is still getting sick every time I do (but NOT AT ALL with the formula), so I am just going to take a break from it until I'm completely healed, and then attempt relactation.

Anyways, let this be a lesson. Do regular self breast exams on yourself. When you find something unusual, get it checked out immediately. And if the initial treatments do not work, make your doctor try something else. Or get a second opinion. Or a third. But trust your instincts, and don't try to wait it out. Here is a link explaining breast self-exams. Check it out.

http://ww5.komen.org/breastcancer/breastselfexam.html

It's Been Awhile....

2012-05-08T01:08:00.000-05:00

As usual, there's never a dull moment in the Morris household, so I've got quite a bit to catch my readers up on... but for this post, I'll just tell you why I've been gone, and why I'm back now. Juicy details to follow in the next post!

I know I've been an absentee blogger for awhile now, but have no fear - I am back!! We finally have internet at our house (not the stupid Sprint hotspot thing... REAL internet!). And, let me tell you, we are ALL excited!! For tose who don't know, we haven't had satellite or cable in years. We used to live off of our internet. We haven't had internet at this house since we moved in, which was December 2011 (6 months ago)! So we've been stuck with reruns of shows we have saved on our hard drive for WAY too long!! And since I've been converted into a stay-at-home mom in the last few months, I've been going CRAZY!!!

Anyways, no big deal, I was gone, but now I'm back, and I promise to update MUCH more frequently. Keep an eye out in the coming days for multiple posts explaining the trials and tribulations we've been faced with recently.

((**SPOILER ALTER** - next post has gorey photos you will probably (not?) want to miss lol!!!**))

Emmalyn Paige has Arrived!!

2012-04-17T21:38:00.000-05:00

I am pleased to announce that Emmalyn Paige was born on April 5th, 2012 at 3:19pm. She weighed 6lbs 4oz and was 19 inches long. She came into this world after only 3 pushes during a since contraction!! (No tearing, no episiotomy for those weirdos wanting to know lol). I *did* get the epidural at 11:21am, BUT I did accomplish my goal of waiting at least 30 minutes from the time I requested pain relief until I actually got it. Everything until the epidural pretty much sucked. I was a wimp. But the pain relief was well worth it, and me being able to relax actually sped the process along nicely. So it was win-win.

My first thought when I saw her.... "She doesn't look like either one of us" (referring in my head to Matt & me of course). I honestly wasn't very excited like I remember being with Devin. Instead, I think I felt more accomplished than anything.

And hungry! As soon as the whole family too Emmy to be weighed, I started chowing down on a several hour old breakfast burrito my mom had brought me!! Then, the whole family caught me with a mouthful!! I'll never live that one down....

So, there is the baby update. I realize the whole labor story isn't included. I think I will save that for another day... That means you'll just have to keep reading!!!

36 weeks

2012-03-29T22:41:00.000-05:00

I'm finally nearing the end of my pregnancy. Yes, that IS a good thing. However, I am not that enthused about it. I am ready to have my little girl here, and to not be pregnant anymore.I have become so miserable lately... I have soooo many contractions, all day, every day. I wound up in the hospital again on Tuesday night because of contractions that were 2 minutes apart, lasting 45 seconds or a minute each. They gave me the Demerol/Phenergan combo again, just like last week. That shot worked wonders last week!! This week, not so much. My contractions slowed to 4-5 minutes apart, but stayed strong, never went away, and then after just an hour and a half, they were back at 2 minutes apart again. That's when I asked to be discharged....

Anyways, the contractions still haven't stopped. I've still been having them every few minutes for days upon days. My back is killing me. I'm not sleeping hardly at all. I've been seeing stars at least a time or two a day for the last few days. It's making me very moody, which in turn is making me very short-tempered. That means Matt is very short-tempered, too, which is not a good combination.....

I'm just ready to be done with all this crap, healing from the last 9 months, and holding my baby girl. I'm exhausted, overwhelmed, and highly emotional.I need a hug, and a back rub.

That is all. I will update everyone after my doctor's appointment tomorrow morning.

9 Months Pregnant!!

2012-03-25T14:38:00.000-05:00

I made it!!! I didn’t really think it would happen, but, sure enough, I made it! As I’ve told just about everyone, I think Emmalyn is going to be a March baby. Well, there’s only 1 week left of March, so I guess we’ll see!! I only made it to 36w 4d with Devin, & “they” say you’re 2^nd one comes earlier than the first, so HOPEFULLY Little Miss will be here in the next 3 days (since I’m exactly 36 weeks today)!

Actually, what’s funny about all of that is the fact that with Devin, my little black dog, Evan, had her litter of puppies THE NIGHT BEFORE I went to the hospital to have Devin. Well, the same dog got knocked up again about 2 months ago, so her “due date” should’ve been about April 24^th (2 days after my due date).

*~WRONG*~!!

She had her litter either late last night or early this morning!!!!! No KiDDING!!

So now I’m really happy & excited & HOPING that the same pattern holds true!!!!!!!!! Speaking of dogs, Matt’s German Shepherd, Roxy, has been super clingy lately, too, which Matt insists she did when it was time to have Devin. I CAN HOPE!! I’m currently at the point where I feel like I’ll be pregnant for FOREVER & A DAY; last night, my feet were so swollen that I literally couldn’t even bend my toes!!! Emm has dropped really low, and just when I think she isn’t gonna get any lower without making an appearance, she does. I’ve been wearing my pre-pregnancy jeans the ENTIRE pregnancy, and it’s only been in the last few days that I can’t really button them.

What I’m getting at is I’M READY FOR EMMALYN PAIGE MORRIS TO MAKE AN APPEARANCE!! She’s been threatening to for 2 months now… we have taken every possible precautionary measure to ensure she is safe & sound… we know she is practicing breathing on her own already… we know she has an awesome sucking reflex, too… so since we are really sure she will be ok to come into this world, I WANT HER HERE NOW!!!

Everyone please pray that either I get less anxious, stop nesting, and become a little more comfortable… or for Emmalyn to come meet her family SOON!!!!!! Lol J

34 weeks 5 days!

2012-03-16T13:45:00.000-05:00

Went back to the doctor today, and got to see our little girl via ultrasound. We were supposed to try for a 3D u/s again today (wouldn’t work last time because she was breech and caused the image to suck), but she was head down & face down this time, so we still missed out on that. BUT, we did confirm that Emmalyn is still a girl!!

So, the latest is that the doctor is still a little concerned about all the contractions I still have (had to make another trip to LDR on Wednesday night because after doing EVERYTHING in my power to stop them at home, I couldn’t). So, I’m still on the Procardia as needed, & I’ll see him weekly from now on. The doctor specifically said that Emmalyn is “all lined up and in position” for labor, so that’s exciting!! That means we are not scheduling a c-section at this point!! He said that she is perfectly on track growth-wise for her age, but I forgot to ask him how much she weighs/what she’s measuring, so no actual numbers this week.

Oh, the best part….. I am *STILL* on bedrest, but he said I can go walking in my yard or get up & do a thing at a time, so that’s great! Our new goal is to make it to 37 weeks (April 1^st), but he said before that he would not stop my labor any more after 35 weeks (March 18^th), so I guess we’re still playing the waiting game.

I have to say, I love my doctor. Not just because he’s pretty to look at (women of Brownwood know what I’m talking about!), but he is REALLY an amazing medical professional. I didn’t even have to tell him I went to LDR again on Wednesday, because he already knew from when the nurses called him about me. He remembered me with me having to refresh his memory. He’s probably delivered a dozen babies since I was at LDR a couple of nights ago, and he’s probably seen at least 40-80 patients in his office since then, too, yet he remembered specifics of my 4 hour visit there. That is an awesome doctor by any standards. I’m proud to be a patient of Dr. Daniel Stewart.

Preterm Labor Statistics

2012-03-09T19:57:00.002-06:00

Just because I was curious…. Here are some facts that I found interesting!!

v More than a half million babies in the United States—that's 1 in every 8—are born premature each year.

v A baby born at 35 weeks is more likely to have—

· Jaundice,

· Breathing problems, and

· Longer hospital stays.

v Health care providers currently have no way of knowing which women will experience preterm labor or deliver their babies preterm.

v More than 70 percent of premature babies are born between 34 and 36 weeks gestation.

v The latest research suggests that many cases [of preterm labor] are triggered by the body’s natural response. In about half of all cases of premature birth, providers cannot determine why a woman delivered prematurely.

Are babies born at 34 to 36 weeks gestation (late preterm) at risk for medical problems?
Late preterm infants are usually healthier than babies born earlier. More than 99 percent of these babies survive, though they are (16):

· 6 times more likely than full-term infants to die in the first week of life (2.8 per 1,000 vs. 0.5 per 1,000)

· 3 times more likely to die in the first year of life (7.9 per 1,000 vs. 2.4 per 1,000)

Late preterm babies often weigh between 4½ and 6 pounds, and they may appear thinner than full-term babies. These babies remain at higher risk than full-term babies for newborn health problems, including breathing and feeding problems, difficulties regulating body temperature, and jaundice (17). These problems are usually mild. Most of these babies can breast- or bottle-feed, although some (especially those with mild breathing problems) may need tube-feeding for a brief time.

A baby's brain at 35 weeks weighs only two-thirds of what it will weigh at 40 weeks (17). Because their brain development is not complete, these babies may be at increased risk for learning and behavioral problems (17). Most do not develop serious disabilities resulting from premature birth.

A recent study, however, found that late preterm infants are more than 3 times as likely to develop cerebral palsy and are slightly more likely to have developmental delays than babies born full term (18). Another study found that adults who were born at 34 to 36 weeks gestation may be more likely than those born full-term to have mild disabilities and to earn lower long-term wages (19).

http://www.cdc.gov/features/prematurebirth/

http://www.marchofdimes.com/baby/premature_indepth.html

Round #2

2012-03-09T19:56:00.003-06:00

Well, today was round #2. I wasn’t quite in and out, but I was only up at LDR for about 30 minutes total, so that was refreshing. The nurse wanted to put me on the monitors to check on Emmalyn because I’ve had decreased movement since yesterday, but that is only because yesterday, she was SUPER active. I wasn’t concerned, and they way I see it is that if I am not concerned, being a hypochondriac and all, then it’s probably ok lol. So other than that, we were good to go!

The game plan as of now is to keep her in at least until Sunday night. I don’t think that will be a problem as I’ve been feeling a lot better lately as far as the labor issues go. There are a couple or few hours every night I seem to feel WAY worse, like I’m about to pop her out any second, and then once that passes, it’s all ok again. The overall plan is to make it past next Sunday though. I’m figuring that now that we have taken every precaution for an early arrival, she’ll come a week or two late ;p

Only time will tell!!

Round #1 of Steroids - (Late Post from Thursday)

2012-03-09T19:56:00.000-06:00

Today was Round #1 of the steroid shots. Those that are close to me know that I was really freaking out about the whole situation. I started reading up last night about the whole procedure, risks, and contraindications for me and for Emmalyn. I figured that information was power, and I wouldn’t be so anxious if I knew what to expect. Let me just tell you, THAT WAS A BAD IDEA. I found information on credible medical websites (including but not limited to the FDA website, and the website of the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology) stating that a doctor prescribes the corticosteroids when labor is expected within 7 days, and that there are explicit contraindications between the steroids and the blood pressure medicine I’m on to stop contractions, etc…. That just made things so much worse. I couldn’t put my mind at ease after my research, but I did manage to just ignore my worst thoughts.

We got up to LDR around 1pm, expecting to get the shot right away, be monitored for any kind of reaction, and on our way within an hour or so. Well, because I had my bloody show late last night (I’ll say again- it’s a blog about pregnancy… what’d you expect?), they decided to check to see if my water had broken, and the nurse and/or doctor decided to monitor me and Em for almost 2 hours before I got the shot. No, my water hadn’t broken, Yes, I was having mostly painless regular contractions on the monitor the entire time we were there. But they decided I was ok enough for the shot around 2:45pm. THAT CRAP HURTS. It has to be given in the butt, apparently. It burns like crazy, and the burning feeling spreads like a wildfire! But as soon as my nurse gave me the shot, she answered a few questions for Matt and I, told me I could get dressed and leave. Apparently tomorrow I just go up there to et the shot between 2p-3p, no monitoring necessary. We’ll see if it really happens that fast J

The Bedrest Chronicles

2012-03-06T20:22:00.000-06:00

Well, today was successful, I guess. I did NOT:

Ø Clean up the living room…

Ø Unload the dishwasher OR reload it….

Ø Cook anything (ok, I’ll admit I did heat up some hot pockets for lunch, but that’s it)…

Ø organize Emmalyn’s room (even though I’m kinda freaking out that it’s not cleaned/organized yet and she could literally be here ANY day)…

I did, however, figure out that a nice, long, 2 hour nap with Devin is very beneficial in helping pass the time J So that was nice. We all got up this morning around 9:15am, then Matt left the house to go take care of some business around 9:30am. About 10:30am, I decided that I was still tired, and that Devin must be, too (he was SOOOO whiny), so we went and laid back down, fell asleep about 11am, and didn’t wake up until about 1pm!! Yeah, naps are a definite MUST in the coming days!!

All in all, I did pretty well. I decided yesterday that I couldn’t look at bedrest as sitting around for the next however many days or weeks potentially, that if I did I would keep doing things and justifying them by saying “I’ll rest tomorrow, but I really need to do [insert task here] today”. So, today, I just took it a few hours at a time & desperately tried to ignore my growing to-do list. I’ll try to keep it up tomorrow, but for now, I’m just gonna try to relax for a few more hours before bed, and I’ll worry about tomorrow when it comes…

One last thing before I sign off – I need to give credit where credit is due. Today’s relaxing wouldn’t have been possible if it weren’t for my husband. He may not be going around doing spring cleaning every day like I tend to, but he is definitely fetching me beverages, fixing me plates of food, moving several feet at a time to hand me things that are only a few inches (sometimes less) out of my reach. He’s been awesome (even if he is following me around from room to room occasionally to harp on me until I go sit down!).

I also wanna thank my sister& brother-in-law, Steph & Sreeni. I’m not gonna go into details, but y’all are amazing people, and even though I’ve already said, THANK YOU for everything you’ve done for our family. We love you guys!!!

See ya tomorrow J

Here’s the 411

2012-03-05T22:14:00.001-06:00

Let me just say that preterm labor sucks. You spend a huge amount of time trying to convince others that you’re “just fine”, when really, you’re not. You try to keep up with the justifications & reassuring other people that “everything’s ok”, when really, everything’s falling apart & you feel like crap & you’re worried sick about you & you’re unborn child…. But you try to keep up the act regardless.

Ok, I’m sure my readers have figured out, the “you” I’m referring to is “me”.

So here’s the latest with Little Miss Emmalyn & me…

As of my last trip to the LDR (trip #5 I think??) at Cedar Park Regional on 2/26, I’m dilated to 1cm internal OS & a “stretchy 2 ½”cm external OS. As of those nurses, I’m supposedly not effaced; however, I know my body & compared to just a couple of weeks ago, there is a BIG difference (oh c’mon, don’t act grossed out – when it comes to pregnancy, everybody seems to want to know what’s going on down there, so I went ahead & gave you all details! Plus, the only male I know of that even reads my blog is my husband, & I get a lot more in-depth with him!). So at my appointment on 3/2, my doctor ordered me to be on bedrest. No working, no cooking, no cleaning, no toddler-chasing, nothing. Just bed, to couch, to pee, to couch. WOOOO HOOOO. I’ve been on “bedrest” for 3 days now, & I have yet to comply 100% for even a single day (I’m trying, I swear it!!!).

Anyways, the medical goal is to keep Emmalyn in until this coming Sunday, March 11^th, when I’ll officially be 34 weeks. In the meantime, we go in to LDR here in Brownwood on Thursday & Friday for fetal monitoring & to receive steroid shots to help develop Little Emm’s lungs.

The social goal is to keep her in until 5:01pm on March 11^th, because my baby shower happens to be this Sunday from 3p-5p, & being the guest of honor means I simply MUST attend (plus I’m REALLY excited to see what an awesome shower my friends Amanda & Melody have put together!)!!!!!! Oh, & I guess I’m kinda excited (*INSERT SARCASM HERE*) about seeing all my friends, too... AND ALL THE PINK AND/OR GIRLY THINGS!!!!!!!

My personal goal is much simpler; I plan on doing NOTHING tomorrow. Just sitting & laying, lounging about… I’m determined to follow my doctor’s orders (as amusing as my dear husband may find that).

In conclusion, plan on seeing several more blogs from me in the next few days. I figure it’ll help keep me still, at least for a little while J

Until tomorrow, loves!!

Week #29 : Preterm Labor

2012-02-06T12:48:00.001-06:00

This post is coming to you all from my phone, so I'll apologize now for misspellings and slang... Well, I've made it to week #29, & let me just say it hasn't been easy these last few weeks. I've been having a lot of contractions that I finally decided to have checked out last Tuesday night at labor and delivery. Turns out, it was a form of preterm labor caused by uterine hyperstimulation. They gave me an injection of terbutaline to stop the contractions and told me to come back if i had more than 4 in an hour that are not relieved by rest and increasing fluids. As I walked downstairs, I started having a few, but decided to go home anyways so i could relax. The next morning, I was still having contractions, but got called into work, so against my husband's better judgement and continual warnings, I went in. It was a hell of a shift, and i was working side by side with the Dr regarding several patients for almost the whole time. He called me out on the contractions I was trying pretty hard to hide, so not wanting to be the nurse that "lies about herself, so we can't assume she won't lie about her patients, too" (that's what was going on in my head), I confided in the Dr that yes, just 12 hours earlier I was released from LDR, and yes, I was in fact having several contractions an hour that were pretty painful.

As soon as the seemingly sympathetic Dr left for the night, I received a call at work from my DON telling me she had heard from an anonymous source that i was in labor, and that i needed to leave the facility to go to the hospital, that i could drop everything to go, or I could call an ambulance to take me. I tried to assure her it wasn't necessary, and decided to stay late and finish my charting. Once I sat down, the contractions became less painful, and less frequent, so i decided to just go home... The contractions never really went away. Just kept coming and going for a few more days. I was tempted many times to go back to the hospital, especially Thursday night when I had 11 contractions in an hour and a few minutes. But I was stubborn still, so I didn't. Then Friday, I felt mostly better again. So when i was asked to work from 7p-1a, I agreed. The contractions came on strong again. As my luck would have it, my relief came in an hour early, so i decided to just go to the hospital to get checked out again. The nurse that took care of me wasn't the same nurse from Tuesday night, but she did remember me. She asked why I hadn't followed up with the Dr (the other nurse NEVER told me to, and I have discharge instructions to prove it!), and decided to give me the full workup. She gave me a bolus of lactated ringers solution with sugar (for my nurse friends, she set the pump to 999ml/hr), then once that had infused, she started another. She also gave me Procardia (PO) and told me if that didn't work, she had orders from my Dr to put me into a drug-induced sleep with Demerol, phenergan, and a muscle relaxer. Thankfully after a couple of hours, the Procardia worked, and I was sent home with strict instructions for no work/traveling at least until I see my Dr on Wednesday morning. Starting again last night, I've been having a few contractions here and there again, so i called my Dr. He put me on Procardia again, but I'm just taking it every 6 hours as needed.for the contractions, and i can do that from the comfort of my home. I'm just waiting until Wednesday to see where we go from here. There's my update!! I'll keep you all informed as I find stuff out!

I've Been Tagged by The Princess!!

2012-01-25T19:29:00.000-06:00

**One - the rules**
one. you must post the rules.
two. post eleven fun facts about yourself on the blog post.
three. answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post, and then create eleven new questions to ask the people you've tagged.
four. tag eleven people and link them on your post
five. let them know you've tagged them!

**Two - About Me**

1.I'm a Sagittarius.

2. I've had 5 surgeries in my lifetime.

3. I've had more broken bones than I can remember.

4. Rules of Engagement is one of my all time favorite shows.

5. Our Christmas tree is still up in our living room (I've said it before, & I'll say it again - I'VE BEEN BUSY!!)

6. I’m the new owner of a 2012 Chevy Cruze, and it’s amazing!!

7. Maternity pajamas are my absolute favorite thing to wear these days!!

8. Devin has the same initials as Matt’s dad (Devin William Morris – Dennis William Morris)

9. I used to COMPLETELY LOATHE Will Ferrell, whereas now he’s one of my favorite actors!!

10. I never wanted to be a nurse. Actually, when I was growing up, I wanted to be a scientist or a doctor.

11. I *LOVE* being a nurse more than anything, but….. I *REALLY* want to be a nurse practicioner!!! That’s my next big career move!

**Three –Questions from the Princess**

1. Would you rather be lazy in your sweat pants or out all dolled up?

A. Dolled up – I always prefer to look my best.

2. What is your favorite thing to do in your spare time?

A. I just like hanging out with my little family.

3. If you could be anywhere right now, where would you be?

A. Corpus Christi, on the beach, watching my kids play while soaking up some sun.

4. Do you read the news? Or watch the news?

A. We haven’t had TV in years, so both Matt & I just read it.

5. What's your favorite kitchen gadget?

A. I love my brand new cutting boards I got for Christmas… I’m fascinated with them because they’re flexible and so useful!!

6. Favorite recipe you've ever cooked?

A. I just really enjoy cooking (except when I’m not rushed or sick or pregnant lol).

7. Do you subscribe to any magazines?

A. Thanks to my mother-in-law, I now subscribe to Entertainment Weekly J

8. Favorite person to see in concert?

A. I REALLY want to see The Toadies in concert. As far as concerts I have seen, I really liked seeing the Red Hot Chili Peppers at the American Airlines Center in Dallas in 2007. Next favorite would have to be acoustic performance by Jonathan Davis at the Hosue of Blues in Dallas, also in 2007.

9. Favorite sushi?

A. I love California rolls!!

10. Favorite workout tip?

A. Hahaha…uhm…??

11. Favorite "adult beverage"?

A. I really love fruity, girly drinks. Different flavored margaritas, mojitos, etc…

**Four – Tag Others**

Unfortunately, I can’t!!! I don’t know enough bloggers to tag… so instead, my new goal is to sort through blogs and follow at least 11 new people!!

**Five – See Above**

Different Kind of Pregnancy Survey

2012-01-25T15:25:00.000-06:00

A little survey for my readers, thanks for continuing to read Sorry I haven't been on too much lately... it's been a very busy couple of months! But I promise I'll try to update alot more regularly now!
How far along? 27 weeks & some change
What was the first thing you bought for your baby? I bought a GORGEOUS pink/brown pack and play from my bestie Melody. (Not the exact one, but pretty close!!)
Total weight gain/loss? Total gain so far is about 15lbs
How are the maternity clothes? Not really wearing any still. The pants won't stay up, and the tops don't show off my bump as well as I'd like, so I'm sticking to my regular jeans (that still fit perfectly) and cute tops!
Stretch marks? A few little white lines are showing up here and there, but nothing too bad so far.
How’s the sleep? Usually not that good. I'm up every couple of hours to pee, and wake frequently in between that to reposition.
Best moment this week? Getting the windows tinted on my car FREE OF CHARGE :)
Movement? This little girl is moving like crazy nowadays, but she still appears to be head down and in position, so that pretty much confines her kicks to my ribs and punches to my bladder.
Have you taken a birthing class? We never did with Devin, and we won't this time around, either. I am, however, reading Husband Coached Childbirth, which I find really interesting. I think it may be helpful in my goal of a drug-free labor/delivery.
Type of delivery you’re planning on? Hoping for a natural, drug-free labor. Preparing myself for the likelihood of getting an epidural if I can't handle the pain (no IV meds though). But I have "a feeling" that I'm gonna have to have a C Section this time, so I'm also preparing myself for that, too.
Biggest change in your body besides belly? Nothing, really??
Food cravings? Mostly sweets.
Gender? Female as far as we know, but we'll do a gender confirmation ultrasound on February 8th.
Labor Signs? Been having alot of pressure down below, but that's probably just because she's so far down. Frequent BH as usual, but no biggie.
Belly Button in or out? Not in like it used to be, but not out yet, either.
What are you missing? All the vanities: being skinny (or skinnier, anyways), a thinner face, fitting into my clothes...
What are you looking forward to? Dressing Emmalyn in her cute outfits,, letting Devin meet her, getting into shape (a shape other than round…), losing weight, holding my very own newborn again!
Other Updates? Wanting to blog about the nursery soon, so stay tuned!! I literally haven't done anything to prepare for Em's arrival, so I need to get started on that soon!!
Only a little over 12 weeks left, if she stays in that long!! Her big brother didn't wait until his due date, so if the same thing happens this time, this little girl will be here in about 9 weeks or so!

Updates!!

2011-12-22T01:14:00.001-06:00

I'm now 22 weeks 4 days. Been super busy with moving, working, and holiday stuff. We still haven't decided on a name for Little Miss (we've come close but we are still just going over our options). I've been trying to work as many hours as possible so we can come close to affording everything we have going on at the moment... It hasn't been easy these last few weeks, but we are working on it. This little girl has been giving me fits, and I've been having tons of Braxton Hicks. Devin has been giving us a run for our money, between getting into everything and having SO much energy! But other than all of that, everything is fine!!! We are doing great!!! My next appointment is on December 28th. I fully.expect to hear that everything is as it should be, so i guess ill just keep updating you all from my phone as I get the time!!!

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Last post for awhile....

2011-12-13T17:04:00.000-06:00

We have alot going on in our lives right now, and we won't have access to internet too much (other than on our phones), so I just wanted to give everyone a heads up!! I promise I'll post pics of the baby bump, and posts about the other new things that are happening, SOON. But for now, everyone needs to know that our life has taking an exciting turn for the better, but I still continue to accept well-wishes and prayers!!! I'll talk to you all soon!!!!

Baby Names

2011-12-02T21:43:00.000-06:00

When I was pregnant with Devin, Matt & I had discussed the name Emmalyn. I love that name. He never had a preference because we already knew we were having a boy.

Well, at the beginning of the pregnancy this time around, I suggested it again. We decided on Emmalyn Elizabeth for a girl, or Jackson Brian for a boy (Elizabeth is my mom's middle name; Brian is my brother's middle name). So, the day we found out, I automatically assumed we were going with Emmalyn Elizabeth. But, Matt & I decided that the name is quite a mouthful, and she's gotta learn to spell it one day, so maybe that's not the best choice. I hadn't told my mom the middle name choice yet, because I didn't want to be locked in to it (since it's her middle name, I assumed she'd be rooting for it). Well, my mother, being the teacher she is, also vetoed the name for the same reasons (ATTENTION, ATTENTION - mark this day on all of your calendars, because my mother & husband NEVER, EVER, EVER agree!!).

So, we set out to find a new middle name. That's when my bestie, Melody, mentioned Emmalyn Grace. I FELL IN LOVE with the name!! Then , I realized a friend of mine from nursing school (who I still see and talk to, but our kids don't hang out) has a daughter named Aklynn Grace (she goes by Gracie). THEN Melody mentioned that another of our friends is thinking of using Sawyer Grace if she's having a girl (we find out at the first of January - yay!!). Being the paranoid preggo I am, I debated on the name, had long discussions with many different people about the name, if it was "acceptable" to use or if I'd be "stealing" it, etc.... I even went straight to the horse's mouth & asked Amanda (preggo friend) if it would make a difference to her [& I quote "I don't get my panties in a bunch over stupid stuff" - hahaha]. By the time I decided for myself that the name was indeed NOT off limits, I didn't want it any more!!

So Melody, being the inspiration/baby lover she is, mentioned Emmalyn Paige, which I ALSO fell in love with!! I checked with Matt, he's never dated a girl named Paige, has only known 1 Paige with whom he associates only good memories (from 1st grade, no less), and I don't believe I've ever had any problems with a girl by that name; therefore, the name is acceptable (lol, not like there's alot of criteria or anything)!!

But now, Matt isn't sure, simply because we haven't really talked about any other names. Funny thing is, every time I try to talk to him about names, he has no other opinions/interest!!

So, I guess what I'm saying is, the name thing is still up in the air. But for now, I will refer to my growing belly as "Emmalyn Paige Morris", and we'll see if it sticks :)

(Her little foot!!!)

Baby #2 - IT'S A GIRL!!!

2011-12-02T21:22:00.000-06:00

We found out on Tuesday, November 29th (my mom's birthday). We took Devin with us so that he would be the first to know whether we were having a Jackson or an Emmalyn. As the doctor waved his "wand" over my stomach, he stated very nonchalantly, "Looks like a girl." I smile (because I "knew" all along) and look over at Matt just in time to see his excited smile quickly change to a worried, fake-looking smile, and both of his eyes started twitching simultaneously as he just stared at the screen in bewilderment. I quickly spouted off an "I told you so" about the same time that I also commented about Matt's demeanor. Right about then, Devin took it upon himself to laugh the most exaggerated laugh possible (impeccable timing, son), which sent Dr. Stewart, Matt & me into a giggle fit!!

After some more checking around, the doctor confirmed that everything looked great, all of my labs thus far have come back normal, and we are both right on track. In fact, she's already 11oz now!!! We go back on December 28th for another well-checkup.

Something I have to throw out there is that, as previously mentioned, I "knew" it was a girl from day #1. I was so confident that Matt & I decided to bet on it a few weeks ago at our friend's house (so we'd have witnesses). What did I win, you ask? Well, I'll tell you!!!!

I won 3 back rubs && a complaint-free house cleaning PER WEEK!! This is to last the duration of the pregnancy (amazing, I know!!)!!! In addition, I also get a complaint-free photo shoot for family maternity photos at the time of my choosing!! I'm pretty excited!!! So, those of you who know my husband, PLEASE, take every opportunity you have to rub it in my dear husband's face that HE WAS WRONG!!!! :)

(This is my "I told you so" face!!!)

Baby #2 (& Hubby #1)!!!! :)

2011-11-27T12:48:00.000-06:00

Well, it's officially a little over 24 hours until we find out the sex of the newest addition to the family!! I'm getting pretty excited!! Matt, on the other hand, is still just kinda "blah" about the whole thing. Now, I know that some of the ladies reading this will get a little upset because "a child is a joyful thing, something to be excited over, and if you're not, you're a bad parent, etc..." But that's not the case, which is what I often have to remind myself of throughout the duration of this pregnancy. In truth, my husband was the same way when I was pregnant with our first. He just doesn't connect to a pregnancy (not that the associated hormones make it easy for him to!). But once that little miracle is about to make it's arrival (such as in the delivery room), THAT is when he gets excited! The previous 9 months is otherwise inconsequential to him.

I do have to admit, this apathy scared the crap out of me with our first. He knows that, I'll admit it. But the first time he held Devin, I **KNEW** he was going to be a great father, and he has continued to exceed my expectations in that department. I know on any given day I can complain about him and every single thing he even thinks about doing, but in reality, he's not such a bad person, and something I've been trying to do these last few months is to give him more credit. He's not perfect, but neither am I (hence, I write this particular post, but haven't really mentioned it to him - whoops).

So anyways, this time around, I haven't freaked out on him (too much) for not touching my belly, not talking to the offspring inside of me, or not treating me like a princess. I know that pregnancy, to Matt, is a one-woman job that he simply has no part of (I said pregnancy, not conceiving). And with Baby #2 fast-approaching, I'm ok with it (now).

But don't tell Matt that : D
(I'm pretty sure that he's already tired of reading my blog, therefore this is a safe zone again!)

My Spin on 16 & Pregnant

2011-11-25T01:38:00.001-06:00

I vote that somebody should fund a show called "23, Married, Employed, Educated & Pregnant".

I'm sitting up here at work, got some downtime, and I'm just thinking about how ridiculous "16 & Pregnant" is.... Girls think that is hard?! (Well, of course it is) But they should try being an adult, dealing with all of the same stuff, but not being able to act like spoiled, ENTITLED, little brats who run right back to Mommy and Daddy when the real work bites them in the @$$.

I'm currently working my 2nd shift of Thanksgiving Day. I have barely seen my son today, and I've seen my husband even less. I have had 4.5 hours of sleep after working all night Wednesday and now all night Thursday. I'm starving because I was too exhausted go eat all day. But guess what? Part of me chose to work all these extra hours on a holiday, because I get paid DOUBLE TIME. My income is paying bills. It's paying for my son's birthday (which is just a few days away). It's paying for an awesome Christmas for my family. I'm sacrificing sleep, quality family time, R&R, and food to keep my family comfortable.

So all these ignorant little teenage girls who are jumping on the bandwagon to get pregnant, the girls who are CHOOSING to consent to underage sex, KNOWING THEY STILL DON'T HAVE TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR THEIR ACTIONS BECAUSE THEIR PARENTS WILL, etc... They can all kiss my butt. I'm busting my butt out in the real world, but nobody tells my tale. Why should we make these girls celebrities????

Rant over :)

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Marriage (It's a short one!)

2011-11-22T15:00:00.000-06:00

Marriage is a funny thing. Over the last year & a half that Matt & I have been married, I've learned alot. For instance, each partner usually wants the same thing - they just have different ways of going about getting it. Or, they feel the same exact way about a particular topic, but it usually SEEMS to come across as apples and oranges. Here is what has me thinking.......

Well, my dear husband has officially discovered my blog (I slipped up), and I finally agreed to let him read one of my posts... But I got to thinking - why haven't I let him read it before? Why haven't I even mentioned it?

Here's my conclusion:

My Theory) As I told Matt when he questioned me, I never feel like he listens to me when I speak directly to him, why would I ask him to read what is on my mind?

Matt's Theory) I'm probably just griping about him on here anyways (lol).

In conclusion, I guess I'm gonna go ahead and give him the URL.... I figure that this way, he'll know I really do think more of him than he gives me credit for, and just maybe, I'll give him more credit for paying attention to what's going on in my mind :)

Baby #2 - 18 weeks!

2011-11-22T14:40:00.000-06:00

How far along? 18 weeks 1 day

Total weight gain/loss: +/- 0lbs

Maternity clothes?: Still in regular jeans for now, but I'm loving the looks of maternity tops on my ever-growing bump!

Stretch marks? Still nothing!! (the left boob scare was a false alarm!!!)

Sleep: Slept REALLY well last night after a long day at work. Woke up at 3:45am feeling SO refreshed, so fantastic, not sore/hurting..... Then I went back to sleep and woke up about 10am with a crick in my neck =/

Best moment this week: (last week) I finally started working, and I LOVE IT!! So far this week, nothing!! **BUT** Thanksgiving is just 3 days away so I'm excited for every pregnant girl's favorite holiday!!

Miss Anything?: I miss my friends!! Hanging out, having a margarita, not having to chase down a screaming toddler!!

Movement: Matt finally got to feel Baby Bean do a flip (although he's still weirded out/not positive I'm not carrying an alien in there)

Food cravings: Anything Thanksgiving

Anything making you queasy or sick: Not this week!!

Gender: *I GUESS* we're gonna find out in 1 week!!! (Like anybody really needed to twist my arm alot lol)

Labor Signs: Tons of Braxton Hicks!

Symptoms: Growing belly

Belly Button in or out? in

Wedding rings on or off?: On

Happy or Moody most of the time: Frequently finding myself yelling at people for no good reason! (Poor Matt!!!)

Looking forward to: Gender scan next Tuesday!

Here's the Verdict

2011-11-15T19:01:00.000-06:00

So, we went to Cook's. We saw Dr. Honeycutt. He was a very intelligent, very personable, and very respectful doctor. He broke the news to us as gently as possible.................

DEVIN DOESN'T NEED SURGERY!

Yes, he has "true Chiari". The cerebellar tonsillar herniation is about 9mm (Devin's brain pokes through the foramen magnum about 9mm, or almost 1 centimeter). But according to Dr. Honeycutt, Devin *is asymptomatic* as far as his Chiari goes. This means that the Chiari DOES NOT cause seizures. Therefore, we still have to follow up with the neurologist (on January 24th) to determine the cause of Devin's seizures.

BUT FOR NOW, WE ARE IN THE CLEAR!!

As far as the Chiari goes, we do a follow up MRI in 1 year. Then, if that's normal/unchanged, we do another in 2 years! Basically, we'll just be monitoring it to make sure the growth of the brain doesn't place any pressure on anything it doesn't need to....

SO THIS WAS THE **BEST** POSSIBLE OUTCOME!!!

Thank you all for your prayers.

Today is the day....

2011-11-15T09:21:00.000-06:00

Well, it's finally come. Tuesday, November 15th. Today is the day we meet with Devin's newly assigned neurosurgeon to discuss treatment options for his condition. Matt's in the shower, Devin's still sleeping, and I've been up for hours, so now that I'm fully ready to go (before my alarm was even supposed to go off), I'm just gonna touch bases with my readers.

Matt and I have decided that we are no longer going to get a second opinion from another children's hospital. The one we were interested in going to (Dell Children's Center, Austin) will be at least a 6-8 week wait to do a new patient appointment, then we still have to wait for the appointment to discuss treatment and whether that doctor feels surgery is necessary. So scratch that. Instead, if they tell us today that yes, we do need surgery, I am going to stage a sit-in until they bring one of the other neurosurgeons doing appointments today (they have like 8 on staff so it's not too much to think there might be another one handy) into the room to tell us his(her) opinion.

But here's the way I see today. There's 2 possible outcomes.....

A.) They say no surgery is necessary. It "may be" later on, but they just want to monitor him for "x" amount of time.
Outcome --> We come home.

B.) They say surgery is necessary. We can do it asap or we can put it off a few weeks/months/years, but it's necessary nonetheless.
Outcome --> We schedule surgery for as soon as possible. I'm expecting another child in a few months, which is going to make scheduling a surgery for then even harder, let alone traveling with a sick toddler and an infant, and then caring for a sick toddler after... not to mention the prolonged hospital stay..... So I say we do it asap.

Plus, the earlier we do it, the better Devin will adjust. Especially if he loses any of his skills (walking, talking, eating, etc), then that's more time before he goes to school that we'll have to "retrain" him, so to speak. And therefore less time behind his peers.

So, now you all know what has been going through our minds. We really don't see any other outcomes to this situation. We are prepared for the worst, because it'd be dumb not to be. But we are still hoping for the best. So any prayers, well-wishes, positive energy, etc, would be greatly appreciated. Keep us in your thoughts around 2:30pm today.

Thanks in advance,

The Morris Family

Baby #2 - 17 weeks!!!!

2011-11-12T13:04:00.000-06:00

Ok, so this week, I'm gonna do something a little different than I have been in the last couple of weeks. This week, I wanna talk about my (tentative) birth plan.

With Devin, I went to the hospital at 9pm on Monday, November 30th, with contractions at 7 minutes apart. I had my membranes swept that morning about 10am (4cm dilated and 50% effaced), and contractions started almost immediately at 10 minutes apart. When I went in that night, I was told I was staying! I chose pain meds first, in an attempt to prevent getting the epidural. Well, I was DRUNK for hours and I hated it. Finally around 3am, I got the epidural. 7am, we broke my water. Then the doctor had to keep stopping my labor (4 or 5 different times) because contractions were lasting too long, were too close together and too strong. Finally at 5:23pm, December 1st, I gave birth!!! But not without almost having to have a C-section, not without several "complications", etc.

Since that day, I knew that my next birthing experience would be different.

This time, I don't want pain meds, I don't want an epidural, I don't want pitocin.I DO want to be able to walk around, change positions, or take a shower if I want to. I do want intermittent fetal monitoring instead of continuous monitoring so that I do have the freedom to move around. I want the baby to come when he or she is ready. and I *DO* want my iPod playing this time lol!!! I also want to stay at home until my contractions are 3 minutes apart (less time locked down in a bed, less time for doctors or nurses to try to convince me to have interventions, etc).

What brings all of this up? I'm watching The Business of Being Born, and it just confirms my wishes. My dear husband doesn't think this time around will go like I want it to. As he says, I'm a wimp and couldn't handle the pain of the contractions last time, so why this time? I'll admit, he has a good point (don't tell him I said that!). But I want to try it, at least. IF I don't succeed, then fine. BUT I WANT TO TRY. I think being more educated about the things I want this time will help me make better, informed decisions.

I encourage all of my pregnant friends to RESEARCH your birth options! KNOW what you want! Whether you want to do it naturally, or if you want every medical intervention possible, KNOW WHAT YOU WANT AND WHY, so that no one can talk you out of YOUR birth plan!!!