Parenting Builds Character

To the mama who “ended up” with an epidural

2014-09-05T14:56:00.000-04:00

To the mama who “ended up” with an epidural,

You are not a failure. Let me repeat. You. Are. NOT. A. Failure. Stop rolling your eyes, grab a tissue for those tears welling up, and exhale. You are not a failure. Now, I know, I know… you read and read and studied and studied for your labor. You know more about the birthing process than you even knew existed 10 months ago. You and your husband planned and processed and decided. You worked for this, you prepped for this, you ate for this, you exercised for this, and you even took more vitamins, supplements and herbs than you can count for this. You lay awake at night thinking about it. You practiced relaxing and breathing, you took classes, and you knew just what to expect. And yet you still ended up with an epidural.

You’re still not a failure.

I get it. It happened to me too. And for years, literally years, Satan whispered my failures and shortcomings in my ear- and I listened.

I didn’t have what it took.

I wasn’t as strong as those other moms.

I didn’t fight hard enough.

I gave in.

I had disappointed everyone.

I was a wimp.

I couldn’t handle it.

‘She’ was better than me.

I needed to make up for it elsewhere.

I would never be ‘mom’ enough.

I was a failure.

With my first born, I read it all and took the class and had the greatest birth plan… my due date came and went and then, finally, at 2am on a Monday morning, my first contraction. And like I could sleep after that… I crept down to the couch and timed every single contraction… 10 minutes apart… then 9 minutes apart… then 8 minutes apart…. By morning I was walking the neighborhood, dreaming of meeting my little man in a matter of hours… but at 9pm that night, when I went to the hospital and found out I was on 2cm, I literally crumbled. 19 hours of labor to get to a 2??? So we went back home… more labor… more walking… hot showers and cold showers and snacks…. And contraction after contraction…. We went back to the hospital the next night, 43 hours into labor… I was a 4. I kid you not. But this time, I wouldn’t leave the hospital. I walked around, I went up and down the steps in the lobby, pausing every 2-3 minutes for a brutal contraction. I finally made it to a 5 and so the nurses filled up the pool so I could have a water birth. But let me tell you what I hate- laboring in water. So back out of the tub I came, after 50 hours of labor, with no end in sight, and I started sobbing… “I’m so sorry” I said to my husband and my midwife, “I can’t do it.” I cried like there was no tomorrow. I finally “caved” and “ended up” with an epidural. 5 short hours later, after a good nap, my little man came into the world. 55 hours from start to finish and I was exhausted, but my Max was in my arms.

With baby #2, my water broke at 35 weeks to the day, only God knows why, so not only did I “end up” with an epidural but also a big dose of pitocin… you know the drug I had vowed “never” to get… And my sweet Jack, all 5lbs of him, was in my arms before the day was over.

With baby #3, my water broke around 9:30pm, and my midwife was at my house by about 10:30pm for a homebirth. It was only a matter of an hour or two before those contraction were radiating through my body every few minutes. I walked and swayed, I was in and out of the shower, I worked and labored and threw up and whimpered, and then I met my 3^rd little man, Sam my sunshine… 16 hours later. So much for a “quick” labor your 3^rd time around. It was my first unmedicated birth. 3rd times the charm, I guess?!

All three of those babies made me a mama… one no more than another. All three of those babies took perseverance, wise choices, hard work, and lots of heart. Little did I know, labor was only the beginning of that process.

So, you “ended up” with an epidural. You are not a failure… you’re a mama. You worked and labored for what you thought was best for your child, and in the end you had to go a different route… you are a mama. You fought until you couldn’t breathe, literally, you are a mama. You had to change the course, veer from the original plan even when you didn’t want to… you are a mama. It was grueling, arduous, sometimes crippling, full of love and devotion… you are a mama.

Motherhood is unknown and hard and ever-changing. It is never what you plan for, more unexpected than you care to recount, and a lot of work. It takes your breath away, knocks you to your knees, makes you weep, and does things to your insides that you didn’t know was possible. It’s the very best thing you’ve ever done… and you got a crash course during labor. You are a mama. As I sit here with baby #4 wiggling around in my belly, can I just say, “Welcome to the best club, ever!” You’ll never be the same, nor will you ever want to be. No, you are not a failure, YOU ARE A MAMA!

Surprise! Happy 30th to Me!

2013-11-04T17:18:00.002-05:00

For the most part, you can find my birthday weekend on the same weekend as the GA/FLA game and the time change.... as in getting an extra hour of sleep. When I was in college, it also coincided with fall break. It was a win/win/win/win situation and truly one of my favorite times of the year. I already explained my obsession with fall. And this particular weekend encompassed it all. And that was even true for years after I had kids.

But on this particular year, not so much. Let's start with the time change. For the first time, it has really messed up my kids and by 8:30 last night, Chad and I were literally both in bed, feeling like we had been hit by a Mack truck. It started with an early wake up call because the kids didn't get the memo about an extra hour of sleep, so by 9am we had already cleaned the whole house and I had made some baby food. So Chad went to mow the yard- before church- naturally. The kids' stomachs were all whacked out too-- they were literally hungry all day and thought they were being starved... until dinner time, when they were no longer hungry. I guess their stomach was off-duty by that point?! They were so tired by the time we made it home for naps that 2 of the 3 didn't nap and Jack napped so long that I had to wake him up and he woke up a grumpy ole poot. And to top it off, the baby slept from 6pm last night til 7:30 this morning. Today has been a little better, but barely. And I won't even mention the Dawgs and the GA/FLA game- we came out with the W, barely, which was just all kinds of wrong. AND somehow, it was all messed up enough that my birthday actually fell the weekend before. Which turned out to be the silver lining... and it was the reason I found myself standing in the middle of a pizza place surrounded by about 30 of my friends and family on my actual birthday.

Let's rewind. Last weekend, I turned 30. And the Dawgs were not playing at all. And somehow, my husband managed to pull off a completely surprising surprise party. You know how after the fact, you usually remember some things that should've been red flags? Well, there weren't even any of those. And I didn't even know Chad had something like this in him, honestly. But the man conspired with my mom and Danielle and the rest is all history....

I had requested that we keep our kiddos with us for the night of my birthday so Chad suggested a picnic with my parents, and that would be that. Or not. Due to an out-of-nowhere cold snap, we decided to pick somewhere to eat on the Marietta square instead of an actual picnic My Dad said he was hungry for pizza and I fell right for the bait with an "oh, there's a great pizza place right there- let's do that." As Chad pulled open the door, I rounded the doorway and found myself in the middle of lots of my friends screaming "surprise!" Then I did what any normal human would do... cried?!??! Ha!

We had pizza....

A balloon guy stopped by....

And Danielle had picked the perfect "cake" for me....

Donuts!

The room was full of my favorite people (most of them anyway!) my favorite kids, lots of cards, and everyone there to celebrate. To say I left feeling loved would be an understatement-- my heart was overflowing! I'm so thankful for my husband- working to pull it all off- he said it was so hard and had him super stressed out! And apparently some of the ladies were a bit concerned because a lot of the communication went through the men, ha! But I was so grateful- actually I still am! Thank you!

Awards Day...

2013-11-02T08:00:00.000-04:00

On Monday morning, while I was getting the boys fed, Chad said that my phone was ringing from a number I didn't know... a few minutes later my voicemail beeped and it was a little Gabe voice saying

"Hey. It's me. Today is awards day and I forgot to tell you. I'd really like it if you could be there. Thanks bye."

Ummmm.... so around 1pm, me and my 3 little people showed up at Gabe's school, OBVIOUSLY, because who wouldn't after that??

Now let me tell you, it's less than ideal to take a 4 year old, a 2 year old, and a baby into that AT NAP TIME.... yucko. But luckily Laura from our church was there and made sure Jack didn't fall off the chair and crack his head open :) And I may have let them eat 3-4 pieces of candy. Each.

But it was all worth it because Gabe received 2 great awards...
Perfect attendance:

And Honor roll!

This is a really cool awards thing that his school does every 9 weeks- and I loved what the principal said-- she said "you all are my 5th graders, so when I call your name, you come up and give me a good hand shake, look me in the eye and say thanks". I love that she is worried about teaching them this stuff- because honestly, we care WAY more about that than grades anyway!

We also had Gabe's conference last week and he got rave reviews-- more than once, his two teachers said "Oh, we love our Gabe!" And they spoke about him being kind and helpful and aware of his classmates. Oh my heart-- way to go Gabe-- those are the compliments and comments that make us so so proud of you!

Trick-or-Treat 2013

2013-11-01T10:00:00.000-04:00

Halloween was a whole new ballgame for us this year.... mainly because Max and Jack decided that they would actually speak this year-- you know a "trick-or-treat" at the door, screamed in sheer ecstasy, followed with a "THANK YOU!" that was genuinely filled with gratitude, because a holiday that includes getting oodles of candy? Why yes, that is the best idea ever, for which they are most certainly thankful!

Meet our baby bear:

And Mickey Mouse:

And Peter Pan:

And our Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, Donatello:

And we tried for some family shots, but..... this was the best one of like 10000! Sam thought he should eat that weapon.... yummmmmy!

But of course when I was trying to take a picture of Gabe, then all of a sudden, a picture sounded like a great idea.... and they appeared right behind the tree :) And it ended up being a super cute shot!

We started out in Downtown Woodstock because I knew Gabe's mom would want to see him all dressed up and Gabe would love seeing his sister... they were cute as can be and Kimbrel did NOT understand why Gabe wouldn't be joining her in her wagon- so adorable!

There were tons of games and fun set up in downtown Woodstock but it was a total zoo- like might lose your children among the throes of costumed kiddos which just wouldn't be good. Anna and her girls met us there too-- once again, our children had themed costumes... Max and Lizzy were Peter Pan and Tinkerbell and ABSOLUTELY adorable! I got Gabe a really great Captain Hook costume, which at one point he said he wanted, but it turns out he completely did not want to be that and tried to pretend like I wasn't standing in front of him holding it. I picked up what he was putting down and offered to take it back so he could pick another- obviously that IS the direction he decided to go!

Man oh man does Max love his Lizzy. They are such good friends!

Jack and Evie were Mickey and Minnie and quite the adorable pair as well, BUT Evie was sick, poor baby, and spent most of her time in the stroller, not smiling. BUT she didn't want to miss the fun altogether and go inside.

Uncle Eli joined us too- which with wild man Jack, we seriously needed his adult help. Speaking of Jack.... this was the BEST thing that ever happened to him. He strutted down the street as people shouted about how adorable he was, he ran up to a house, said "trick or treat" was handed candy and preceded to immediately pop it in his mouth if he could get the wrapper off before I could get to him. He was so elated after every single house. Which would sometimes send him running with shouts of glee... into the street! Thankfully, I could be on candy-to-bag duty, Chad could be on stroller duty, and Eli would be on street duty/ save the child from being ran over. Then we would switch. Max also informed me that we would not need a wagon because "actually Eli would like to hold him and Daddy could hold Jack," It also helped having Gabe there to show the kids the ropes- it took no more than 2 houses for them to understand that speed was their friend and if they ran fast enough the adults would give up shouting for them to wait and just keep up.

Now all of this fun wore the baby smack out. He was sound asleep before we even made it out of the Prusa's yard. It's rough being the 4th boy....

Happy Halloween from the cutest boys around!

It's Fall Y'all!

2013-10-27T21:59:00.000-04:00

Fall is my favorite time of year- for many reasons-- I love the crisp weather and the smells and the colors. I love the activities that go along with this time of year, and the clothes, and the food too. I love football on tv, and for some reason, fall just gives you more reasons to get together with people.

The beginning of fall is marked by football season-- and I really do love my Dawgs. This season has been a bit rough- we were flying high and then plummeted, but red and black nonetheless, woof woof! And it's been fun celebrating and watching with friends too, and making sure my boys know that Saturdays mean it's time for our jerseys.

The North Georgia Fair was also on our list for this fall-- Gabe earned it after reaching some goals at school and so we dropped the baby off with Annie and headed out for a family night. The boys loved it- even Chad- but I've got to tell you, the food used to be "good" me-- and now the smells alone make me nauseated... I'm getting so old. And when you break down the actual seconds you spend on rides with how much it costs, it ain't pretty. But again, I'm old. The BOYS loved it- grinned all night and talked about it for days afterwards, which of course makes it worth it.

We visited the pumpkin patch and corn maze-- it's our annual tradition with the Spivas-- this is our 4th year and we've managed to add a new pumpkin each year... and next year will be no different! They're expecting punkin number 3 in May, yayyyyy!!! We saw lots of pumpkins, shot a corn cannon, fed goats (nasty!), did the corn maze and the hay ride, but the boys had the most fun on this big pile of tires and a kiddie maze made from soy bean plants- they ran around that thing like nuts. It was so cute. And then of course Jack was covered in mud by the end....

We also got to go to the fall festival at Gabe's school. It was extra fun because it was put on by our church- so we got to work the hayride and meet and talk to people, as well as bump into Gabe's classmates. They decorated pumpkins, Gabe did the cake walk until he won, which was like 100988 times, they rode the hay ride, passed out candy, loved on the animals in the petting zoo (again, yucko!) and of course had to play in the jumpy. By the time we got home, we were all worn smack out. Just how I like it... there is nothing quite like a good Saturday afternoon nap!

And we're closed out "fall festivities" by carving and decorating pumpkins tonight. This has always been something for Chad and the boys and I just stand back and take pictures-- I get to stick my hands in enough goo between all the diapers, snot noses, and spitting up going on in these parts, so it's the least I can do :) This year, Gabe was our designer, Chad is still the only one yielding knives, Max was all about scooping out the guts, Sam watched and laughed, and Jack was all over the place in typical Jack form.

(Man I love these boys!)

I'm so thankful for this time of year-- you can see God's creativity, beauty, and love everywhere you look.

The 30 Best Moments in my first 30 years on Earth

2013-10-26T08:00:00.000-04:00

I decided that in celebration of my 30th birthday, and in an effort to break my blog silence, I'd compose a list of the 30 best things that have happened to me during my tenure here on earth. Thinking through this has been emotional, to say the least, and I will never have the words to adequately express my gratitude. Everything on this list has shaped and drawn my closer to Jesus in ways that I can't always explain-- just typing them makes me choke up!

(This list is in chronological order....ish!)

1. The Gift of Jesus

2. Following Jesus at a young age. Mainly because I carry very little baggage. Now, I didn't always feel this way... I used to lay in bed fussing at God, telling Him that I wished He could have called me to Himself later in life... I was convinced I'd have more fun if I didn't know Him, but since I did, I couldn't turn my back on Him so I followed the "Christian rules" begrudgingly! (If you knew me during this phase of my life and my walk with Jesus, I am SO sorry- there is so much more to following Jesus than rules and I'd love to tell you about it and apologize to you in person)

3. My Mom- from providing for my every need from birth, all the way to being my favorite friend and confidant to date- there are not enough words in my head to adequately express how she’s shaped me and how blessed I am to be her daughter.

4. My Dad- he woke me up every morning, even when “I didn’t want him to”, he was the doctor when I was sick, he made me hold his hand at church long after I thought it was socially acceptable, and he always picks out the best gifts. He loves my mom and really likes her too. He fights for us kids even when we don’t think he’s right or when we don’t want the help. And he has given me a lifelong example of what it looks like to live a life of daily integrity and trusting God.

5. Being born into my family. When I first typed that sentence, I was meaning my mom and dad and my brothers- but then I thought about my grandparents who love the Lord and are leaving a great legacy... then I thought about all of my aunts and uncles and cousins-- so really, I mean the whole bunch of them!

6. When my Papaw flew in from Indiana to baptize me in front of my Concord Christian Church family when I was 9 years old

7. Having Erin "Shirl" Burks as my ever-loving, always protective, forever faithful best friend for a decade plus

8. When my mom made me go to small group when I was in High School and even to the book study at Steak n' Shake on Saturday mornings... which led to meeting my very pregnant small group leader, Kellee Hall, which drew me to her immediately. Her heart, wisdom, encouragement and love have helped to shape me in so many ways that I'm sure I've forgotten over half of them

9. Deciding to go to the University of Georgia for college

10. Rooming with Anna McCulloch Prusa's next door neighbor my freshmen year... it allowed me to meet Anna, which led to incredible roommates and a bushel of other life long friends, AND becoming a part of Campus Outreach

11. The Christmas we went skiing in West Virigina as a family instead of having a big Christmas celebration... it was the first time I saw my brothers as my friends-- and they were fun.... and funny.... and I liked them!

12. The moment I realized that Jesus was 100% Truth AND 100% grace, 100% of the time.

13. Interning with Ruth Van Yperen McCord the summer of 2004... I literally fell in love with her heart at first sight.

14. Taking a job at North Metro Church after college- the relationships, the lessons, and the battle scars have shaped me in more ways than I can count. I also gained several LOYAL, “if you’re going down, they’re going down with you” friends who continue to be a part of my daily life.

15. Calling off a wedding. Man, it was absolute hell at the time- I hurt like I didn't know was possible, but BOY oh BOY did I get what I looks like to "need Jesus". I wouldn't wish heartbreak like that on anyone, but I'd do it again in a second to know Jesus like I do now.

16. Marrying Chad. His friendship. His love. His heart. Even fighting with him- it makes me CRAZY but it also makes me better.

17. Becoming a stepmom. There is NOTHING God has used/ is using to refine me more, and teach me to lean into Him more than this role.

18. Getting my in-laws as my family as well-- they are kind and accepting, 100% of the time. They consider me a daughter/ sister, and have treated me like family from the very second they met me. And if we called and said "we need y'all" they'd jump in their car and drive straight to us without another question.

19. Joining a small group with the Morgans, the Rouses, and the Weavers right when Chad and I got married- we learned how to be married well with them.

20. Gathering a group of wonderful ladies and becoming the queso loving “Porton Posse” to get together and meet for Mexican and encourage each other in life, marriage, spirituality, relationships, praying about babies and then actually birthing babies and learning how to be mamas

21. August 19, 2009 at 8:41am-- Max was born, I became a mom, and every fiber in me changed forever.

22. Watching my parents love my babies

23. Standing beside Chad as he baptized Gabe, and hearing that blue-eyed boy proudly profess Jesus as his LORD and Savior

24. Raising kids with a like-minded friend like Danielle Morgan—God wasn't kidding when He said “As iron sharpens iron,  so one person sharpens another. Prov 27:17”

25. Becoming a part of Sanctuary church

26. When Jack Henry Bowman entered my world over 5 weeks before I expected him... that was just the beginning of how he was going to shake up my sense of control, but it's worth every gray hair and fist clench. He's passionate about everything he does-- and he's especially passionate about his mama. And I am passionate about him.

27. The year my brother Eli lived with us. I know it was torture for him, but it was so sweet for me.

28. The moment I got to quit my job to become a stay-at-home Mom

29. Starting BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) and committing to a yearly in depth walk through scripture.

30. Birthing our sweet baby Sam at home- the accomplishment I felt to have the strength and stamina to do that is awesome, but the baby surpasses all words. He is straight sugar and sunshine. Being a mama is the best job, ever!

On Marriage

2013-08-30T08:30:00.000-04:00

So we were riding along in the car and Max asked when Averi and Brian were coming again. They are our sitters who keep our boys when we go out on dates, but the problem is we had a baby and forgot about dates. Oops.

Anyway, I responded something like "oh yeah, we need to have them over again really soon." (Hint, Chad, hint.)

So after a few moments of silence, Max asked "Why don't they have any boys or girls?"

Umm.... I decided that talking about premarital sex at the age of 4 would probably be a bit much and just decided to shape his over all thinking on the subject with a simple "Averi and Brian are not married yet-- you get married and then when you're ready you have a family."

Max responded with an "I know."

(Well then leave me alone so I don't have panic attacks trying to pick words for such a question little smarty pants.)

Again, some more moments of silence.

Max: "Well why do "so and so" have a girl and they got unmarried?.... guess they won't be having anymore babies."

So now I'm really sweating, because obviously divorce is something that is all around us- hello, Max has a brother from another mother, Max's Daddy is divorced, and all that really not fun stuff that will one day be openly discussed with our kids- but for now I just responded with the super mature "Who told you that?"

Max: "Mommy, I know they were married and then they got unmarried last year. (Long pause) Are you and Daddy going to get unmarried?"

AHhhhh finally a question I know how to answer! "No Max, we are married forever. God tells us in the bible that marriage is forever and we believe it's really important to obey God- when we obey Him, it's the best way. You know how sometimes you disobey Mommy and get in trouble? Well when you get unmarried, you disobey God and it causes A LOT of trouble."

I then go into how God is going to show him someone who's really special when he grows up, and he will marry her, and leave mommy and daddy and start his own family. And I add for good measure "and you'll be married forever and you'll have lots of fun and be in deep love."

His next response was the best yet, but you must know the back story first...

At the beginning of this week, Max had his first sleepover at his friend Lizzy's house. When we met up with them to pass Max off, Lizzy asked "Do you want to sleepover, Max?" And he replied, "Yes, because you're my best friend." And Lizzy responded "Well if you marry me, we can have sleepovers every night." Max grinned ear to ear but was a little taken aback by the whole thing. Let's be honest, he comes from a long line of men who don't like to share their feelings and all this marriage talk was a bit much. He also doesn't have a sister or anything that makes him play bride and groom or any of that fun stuff. And truthfully, we avoid all "girlfriend" talk with our kids because we feel really strongly that you date to find who you're going to marry, and well no one from this house is getting married anytime soon, so all of this is just a really foreign concept for him. Well Anna and I just died laughing nonetheless, and it was so sweet and hilarous. But it all never came up again.

Or so I thought.

Now back to the car discussion....

Max says "Well Lizzy wants to marry me, but maybe I'll marry Molly when she's 6 or 12. Is she two yet? When is her birthday?"

Of course I sent this information to Molly's mom (Danielle) and dad (Matt) who happens to be the family pastor at our church... he responded that he is beginning to work on a curriculum about marriage for our preschool department :)

Oh kids these days... make your mama sweat! I just pray that the Lord gives me the right words when it really counts- you never know what's going in one ear and out the other, and what is going to pop back up when you lease expect. Thank you Lord for these kiddos and these moments- but I pray you're the One shaping them through me-- not me, of my own accord!

Batter Up!

2013-08-29T08:00:00.000-04:00

I've decided that I'd be more effective at blogging if I actually learned to tell a quick story "quickly"-- imagine that. So here goes my first attempt...

So Max is obsessed with baseball. Really obsessed isn't a big enough word for what he is- the moment he awakes, he's ready to play. Of course this meant that we signed him up to play tball this fall, thinking it would relieve some pressure on the rest of us to pretend like we want to pitch it and watch him play imaginary ball all day long. But no, there has been no relief. We've just stepped it up to a new level.

Once we got the email informing us that Max's team would be the Orioles, we had to head to Dick's (what he calls "the ball store" the next day because he needed gray baseball pants and a helmet.

This is serious business folks.

Then I had already picked out new cleats for him for his birthday and let him open them 3 day before his birthday and 1 day before his first practice ever.

The child was elated. He floated on a cloud as he ran bases around my living room for the rest of the day.

Well, early Saturday morning (8am) was his first practice... and none of us wanted to miss it, so we loaded up the van.... all 6 of us.... to go watch Max practice tball.

And when we got there, our little athlete wouldn't speak or make eye contact or throw the ball for the first 15 minutes. Um, can you say anticlimactic?

Finally he loosened up a bit-- they were supposed to throw the ball towards the bucket which served as a target. Most of the kids had a hard time getting it in the general vicinity. But Max? Well, he either got it IN the bucket or hit the bucket every single time.

Then he moved to some hitting practice. The coach tried to tell him where to stand and how to hold the bat. Max looked at him with disgust, turned and got himself ready, and then bunted it off the tee. He is very proud of his bunting skill. We're just glad he didn't switch hit for them.

And then he fielded some ground balls before running the bases.

By this point, my child who has dreamed of running the bases since he escaped my womb was overtaken by his introversion and melted down. Luckily Chad was able to maneuver him through the last 5 minutes without any permanent damage. But after Max was able to process through it all, he declared his first practice as the greatest day of his life.

Slowly but surely, our little Jock is relaxing a bit-- although communication is not his forte, and he won't be caught dead actually speaking audibly to his teammates or coach. It really is too bad there is no "i" in TEAM for Max's sake-- but this will be good for him.

Life can be properly divided into 5 compartments now-- we play baseball, watch baseball, read about baseball, talk about baseball, or GO to baseball.

And that's it!

His first game is September 4th- it should be highly entertaining! Details to follow....

Lately

2013-08-28T13:40:00.000-04:00

Motherhood is not for the faint of heart. Let me just make that clear. Somedays, it seriously is survival of the fittest. Beginning at 11:30 last night, I was up about every 30 minutes for some reason or another, and then Max and Jack have been up since Max's 5am potty break. And by up, and I mean "HELLO WORLD, LET'S PARTY!! ISN'T THIS A FINE TIME TO START THE DAY!!!???!!!!!" It really isn't good. But I've come to the conclusion that I need a t-shirt that reads "I'm not nearly as stressed as you are watching me". This rambunctious 4 year old, the rambunctious 2 year old and their baby brother are my sidekicks all the live long day. I can do nothing "real quick" and I'll never again "jump in the car really fast" or "run a few quick errands" BUT loading and unloading this crew, eating meals and simultaneously carrying on conversations, holding one fussy kid while scraping another fussy kid off the floor, cleaning up one mess while new ones are made, etc... well that is just normal life for me. There are several times a day where I literally break out in a sweat because getting a certain task completed- like nap times, clean up, getting dressed, baths, etc...- literally leads my body to believe that it's exercising. But again, it just doesn't even faze me... besides the fact that I always feel greasy! Sometimes I get "that look" from strangers and friends alike, and it takes me a minute to realize they are overwhelmed by me and my brood and assume that I am too.

Case in point: Yesterday, Danielle and I took our crew of 5 between the two of us... ages 4,3,2,1,and 0 and played at the gymnastics place for a bit then headed to Moe's for lunch. While at Moe's our kiddos, on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the best behavior in the world, were steadily at a 9. But by the end, as we were trying to parade out the door, there was a long line of others trying to obtain their lunch, and our cute little crazies decided to do happy screams as we made our way out. Like loud. But again, they were all happy and just being silly. The high school students in there literally looked over their shoulders in disgust. I saw it as my contribution to their own personal birth control. The people in line were cringing. And Danielle and I, literally laughing! This is after some random man came up to our table and said "Does one of you drive a Toyota Sienna? Well you left the door open." (Wonder why he assumed it was us.....)

I do not want to live in the stage forever- I just don't think it would be good for my health, my blood pressure, or the bags under my eyes- but for now, I just really do enjoy it and it always makes me laugh. My days are busy and long, ohhhhh yes they are. But who else has stories like this?

But because of aforementioned busy days, my blog memories are suffering, so I'd like to perform an iphone camera dump of "Lately" in order to get certain things on the books forever!

So... Jack learned to roller skate...

And he also choked on a Mentos while I was driving. Like I had to do the heimlich maneuver and it is by the grace of God that he is still with us. I am not joking. But I cannot discuss it or else I'll be in the fetal position. I was so shaken by this that it took me about 30 minutes before I could drive again-- it took Jack about 30 seconds before he fell asleep. At least one of us wasn't scarred for life.

Jack also has started "disappearing" for a few minutes every day and coming back with a wad of wipes and a diaper declaring that he's "stinky shoo-wee"-- I know I should take this as a sign to potty train the boy seriously, but I'm not mature enough for that yet.

One Sunday morning I laid out clothes and asked Chad to get the baby dressed... when I went to get the baby out of the car I noticed a huge white floppy tag under his chin like a beard... Chad hadn't seen it and couldn't believe that baby clothes would be buttoned in the back. I would elaborate, but I'll just stop after pointing out that this baby is Chad's 4th. Fourth.

My bathroom always looks like this- I hang that towel, wipe the bright blue kid toothpaste from the sink, and stack the stools away multiple times a day. Chad had mentioned several times that I am wasting my energy and that such tasks are pointless... I respond by pointing out that 99% of my daily tasks could be categorized the same way... why do laundry, it's just going to get dirty again? Why feed them and clean the kitchen, I'm just going to have to repeat it all in 2 hours? Why get them out of bed, I'm just to put them all back again shortly. But someday folks, there will be no toothpaste to wipe and they'll be able to reach the towel hanger, and my life will then again have a point :)

This is 3 of the 4 brothers the day before Gabe headed back to school- we ended the summer with one last swim at my parents before it was time to buckle down and have a real bed time. These boys melt me.

This is the day Jack decided that his helmet would be part of his attire for the day... it even had to go with us in the car... guess he's afraid of my driving... but before I knew it, he was out like a light. It's hard work holding up that head and a helmet!

We also went for some exercise on the Silver Comet Trail with my mom-- both Max and Jack insisted on riding their scooters... so this is how my mom had to walk:

And this was my view. I was having one of those "living the dream" moments as I captured this picture.

Jack has also taken to dressing himself-- he sees Max do this regularly too. The problem is that Max picks gym shorts and a t-shirt every day, while Jack's style is really more his own... there really aren't words to categorize it. And at least a day or two a week, the control freak in me releases all control and I actually take him in public like this.

Jack also got this hat in the mail from Grandpa and he refused to be without it for about 10 days. At this point, I snuck it away to wash it because it was stinky and haven't given it back yet... bad mommy!

And because Max likes to wear baseball pants everyday, Jack has talked him into sharing. And it's just the most adorable sight. They are rolled a time or two-- but he just loves to "dress baseball and play bases like Maxie."

Meanwhile, over the summer, Max and Jack became best friends. I think it happened around the time that they started sharing a room, but they can be found together all of their waking hours. And when one is away, the other misses them dearly. Last week, Max went to Wednesday night church and Jack stayed home with my mom-- on the way home, Max confessed "I just hoped that Jack would be there all night." They fight like cats and dogs, but they are each other's BEST BUDDY, too. It's exactly what I hoped for in my children.

In Gabe's book bag this week, I found this wrinkled up at the bottom-- it's his "about me" paper for the year-- here is what it read: "My name is Gabe and I am 10 years old. I was born in 2003. I have 3 brothers and 1 sister. I like to play soccer. I have a very good teacher. My brother Max is very chatty. I had a whole week with my grandparents last summer. My little brother Jack just turned two, double trouble. Now you know about me."

SO FUNNY!!!

And lastly, this is the face that bring me joy and tickles my soul each time I see his sweet face. He is my baby sunshine and he lights up my already bright world!

5th grade, here we come

2013-08-07T18:12:00.001-04:00

On Monday, we went to Gabe's meet n' greet at his new school. We met his 5th grade teacher and we both loved her. He came home and said he was now excited to start school. Yay! We had been talking through his fears for a couple of weeks-- fear of not knowing anyone and a new school- but I kept telling him that he's great at making friends, teachers love him because he's respectful, and that he's a quick learner so he'll adjust quick. I guess after being in the school, he was convinced of that too!

So Tuesday night he packed his own lunch, picked out his own clothes and set his alarm. For 6am. That's brutal folks. His bus comes at 6:50am at the end of our street. I just can't imagine if he was a kindergartener. Truthfully, he probably won't ride the bus many days, but we want to establish the habit for him and for the bus driver so that if we ever need him to ride, it's an option.

This morning he was in the kitchen before we were. He was chatty cathy and I was bleary eyed trying to find the coffee pot!

He fixed his own breakfast... a cereal bar and a protein shake and he snatched up his book bag and headed off!

I reminded him that no first day is complete without a picture and he obliged :)

Chad on the other hand wasn't quite ready for the barely lit walk to the bus stop...

And so the rest of us waited until 2:30pm....

The little boys voted for late naps so they could see his bus....

And took off running when I told them it was time....

We had to stand near the mailbox so the baby's monitor would still work while we waited for the sight of that big ole' yellow cheese carrying our Gabe home...

And when they spotted it....

They took off!
Some a little faster than others....

And all was well in the Bowman nest!

He came in the door all smiles and and stories-- he was handing me forms and telling me about the day. He loves a good day of organizing, and that's mostly what today was-- learning the ropes, labeling notebooks, making cover pages and color coding... be still my heart :)

Gabe- we can't believe you're in 5th grade! We're excited about your year and watching you keep growing into the man God wants you to be! We pray that you're always brave enough to be a leader and do the right thing, even when it's hard, and that you'll live and love like Jesus! Now just know that even though you think you're too old, I will continue to hide notes in your lunchbox from time to time, and your brothers will always be awaiting your arrival back home. Have fun, learn a lot, and slow down the whole growing up thing, geez! Love you buddy- more than you know or understand!

Tour of The Rooms

2013-08-06T21:50:00.000-04:00

My list of things to blog is pretty long-- hopefully I'll do doing one of my infamous blog pile ups over the next couple days-- babies are hitting milestones, big kids are starting school, we're all winding down our summer, God is working my heart over in a new way-- but tonight, we're just going to have to let a room tour suffice. Now really, 99.76% of you won't care one bit about this post, but since I do print my blog posts into a book to serve as lovely memories for me some day down the road when blogs and little blonde boys are a thing of my past, I need to post this.

We moved into this house in February when I was big as a house and eagerly awaiting lil Sam's birth while simultaneously doing my best to keep him in as long as necessary. So things basically just got put where they were supposed to get if they were necessary for living everyday life. Life a bed, per say, and clothes. Pictures and decor were a thing of the future... like if/when mama got her head back on straight. Give or take a year or 20. Well somehow, this baby came out a sleeper. And. Gasp. He stayed that way. We are 3 months in and we've barely had a bad night- and only one was him. Which leads to my point.... I've finally gotten all of the boys rooms mostly together and the way I want them- give or take a detail or two.

Now, you should know that all of my boys and Chad were totally losing sleep until I got everything just so. Or not. Whatever.

But I am now resting quite well, because.... Ta da....

Baby Sam's Nursery:

This is what you see when you walk in....

And this is you look right...

This is the twin bed in his room with the banner left over from his baby party... my friend Danielle made it for his munch n' meet and I just love it, so it's a part of his decor now :) And I have a twin bed in their for the nights when it's a waste of time to go back to your own bed. Which hasn't happened yet except for one night when he had a stuffy nose.

Here is Sam's changing table, some pictures and a glimpse of his glider. I feed him about 50% of the time in this chair that was given to us by our wonderful friends the Canups.

And here are his curtains, made by my mama of course! I love them. And she always puts black out stuff on the shades so their rooms are D-A-R-K for naps! That's a blessing in itself.

Here is an "up close" of the pictures on the wall above the twin bed. These were also made by my mama. And no, she's not for sale. We're keeping her.

And his crib. I love how plain it is. It seems so soft and dreamy. That wild things picture is left over from Max's nursery but somehow we ended up with the same color scheme again, so I get a second use out of it- love when that happens! His shelves have a few baby books, a couple bins of baby toys, and lots of how-to mommy books... and of course his sound machine, my clock because I always have to know what time it is and how long he eats, even though he can eat as long as he likes, and my #1 favorite mom thing- his video camera.

Up close of the pictures over his changing table: a picture frame gift, a little cork board, and a picture I painted at one of those painting classes, made to go with his theme-- it says "This is the day that the Lord has made"

Remaining detail that needs done: recovering the glider

Now onto Max and Jack's big boy room:

from the door....

Max's pictures are taken by the one and only BrandelynLee Photography-- she's amazing! And of course their room is sports themed- what else?

This is Max's dresses and both of them have knick knacks on the shelves. Jack has a big dresser in the closet and they both have lots of hanging clothes room in the closet as well. We found the dresser on Craig's List and the knobs on the internet and the shelves from IKEA.

Here is the beloved bookshelf. They both love books- on their own and when I read to them-- they learned this from mom my who is a sucker for a good book. They could listen to her for house. Come to think of it, I could too. She does voices and sound effects and all. They also have a cork board to display all their church pictures-- my fridge just isn't big enough for them all!

The curtains are again made by the lovely and talented Vicki Noblitt and the dust ruffle too- all coordinating with the bed spread and sports theme but not matchy matchy. Jack also has pictures by the aforementioned BrandelynLee-- and those baby rolls get me every time I pause for a peek. What a boy, that Jack. And that Max. And Gabe. And Sam. Chad too. Ok, all my boys.

Here is Jack's bed-- it's also passed down from the Canups- with matching stuff made by my mom. And yes he's 2 and in a crib for as long as it lasts... meaning, as long as he doesn't crawl out. Why? In a word? Containment. And it's a glorious thing. Of course they have a set of golf clubs, my old rocking chair painted to match, and a laundry hamper so they can clean up after themselves.

Remaining detail that needs done: The valances need pinned so that their more squared and the inhabitants of the room need to learn to go to sleep.

(please send me a note, a detailed letter, some bullet points, or a poem on how to get them to GO TO SLEEP, when sharing a room, if you have any advice on the matter. They think it's a party. Every night. A party that last many hours. But once they got to sleep, they sleep like little angels til morning. Don't you after a good party? Go figure.)

And Gabe's Man-Cave (he named it!)

The view when you walk in....

His bed, and yes, he makes it that neat himself, seriously.

His cute lamp I found at Target, and his picture from Homegoods.

His Hawks banner his Pawpaw won for him, along with his desk. He did lots of his work here when he home schooled, and still does his bible study here, too. His board is for "important things" as he says and not many things make the cut!

And here is his Gabe-collage made from some of my favorite pictures as he's grown up-- I want to keep adding to it, not only because he's adorable, but as a reminder of how God has grown him up. The black dots are wall decals from Target and you can write on them with chalk-- right now they are some great verses from the bible that I want him to focus on during his 5th grade year. There is nothing better than clothing yourself in scripture!

And his shelves are covered in his favorite books, bins of toys, and lots of lego creations.

Remaining detail that needs done: A picture of some sort for over his shelves-- hoping to find a good soccer one but nothing has grabbed my attention yet.

And that does it for the tour, thanks for visiting!

No Longer Sappy, Just Sticky.

2013-07-29T17:49:00.001-04:00

Remember in my last post how I was reminsicing about my sweet babies and how they're growing without my permission. Well, I'm completely over that today. 100%.

It all started on Thursday night. Chad got home late from work, my parents had dropped off a load of furniture to store here, and everyone was wound WAY up. So bedtimes were like 2+ hours later than they were supposed to be. By the time I crawled into bed, it was about 11:30 which is an hour and a half past my own bedtime. The last sound I remember hearing was the rattle of Chad popping a benadryl because something had gotten to him. That was the last sound for about 4 minutes, when all of a sudden, I hear Jack screaming and wailing. I quickly got him and put him in our bed, and I'm pretty sure it was night terrors of some sort. He was cantankerous and not to be calmed. I finally turned on disney junior and rolled over. About an hour later, his eyes were good and glazed over, so I turned off the tv. He promptly went to sleep right in the middle of my pillow. And from there, all 3 boys were in and out of sleep for the entire night. No one was sick. There was nary a boogie man to be found. Yet they all needed my attention in the middle of the night. The only time I got solid sleep was from 2a-3a. That's an hour folks. That's also about 8 hours less than I normally get/ need.

I should've seen the signs. This is so abnormal that I should've kept us in pj's all day and started a fresh on Saturday. Shoulda, coulda, woulda... that's all I can say about that.

So instead, I got up Friday morning on an hour of sleep, and got the 3 boys dressed. Gabe had gone with his Granny for a week-long staycation to end his summer, so it was just me and the littles. I decided breakfast prep was beyond my abilities and offered up Cracker Barrel instead. But no, they would only hear of donuts, and quite frankly, I wasn't in the mood to coerce about which type of sugar they were going to be getting, so I gave in. The was bad decision #1, because taking a dieting donut lover who is desperately trying to lose baby weight to Krispy Kreme when the light is on is like taking an alcoholic to an open bar. It wasn't pretty.

Next, I ran a few errands- took back a picture to Homegoods, mailed at package at the Post Office, ran to the bank, and fed the baby in the car. None of these are for the faint of heart if you're a mom to a 3 year old, a 2 year old, and a newborn. Namely because of those ages, approximately zero of them can buckle themselves and load themselves in and out of the car. But I had a little touch of "I am woman, hear me roar" and "can't nobody hold me down" going on, and I told these errands what was up!

Then I showed up at the Regal movie theater. (Insert laughter here). The plan was to meet 4 other girlfriends and their 8 children and see "Turbo". We had bought our tickets early, planned to arrive before the show started to potty and get popcorn and were all excited for the show. (It's ok if you're still laughing.) My girlfriend Jolynn who is pregnant with #4, and has a 4 year old, a 3 year old, and an 18 meh old even said to me, "you're lucky you still have one in the carrier". I just nodded and smiled because I was under the impression that this was going to be a good experience. I'm an idiot.

We went our own way when we got into the theater-- going potty while everyone got snacks. By the time we were in the snack line, it was long and my little guys were really excited and running amuck! I ordered a medium popcorn for us all to share, a medium cherry coke for me and Jack, and a small fruit punch for Max. $17 dollars and 95 pounds of sugar later, we headed into the movie. I had the baby in his carrier on one arm, my diaper bag on the other, a bag of pop corn, and a huge coke in my hands. Max was behind me with his cup, and Jack doing his waltz behind us. But Jack has never been to a movie before. And he's kinda skittish right now. And we entered the theatre once it was already dark and after the loud previews had started... Jack flipped, but I had no hands to help. So I went up to the middle, set the baby down, and then snacks and bags, got Max in his seat and went to rescue Jack. I got him comfortably settled in my lap, the popcorn helped him calm down quickly, the baby was on my right, buckled in, freshly fed and changed and ready for his nap, and Max on my left. I was sweating, but breathed in a sigh of relief- we were here, it was a cute mom-moment, and I was relishing my boys.

This lasted for 4 minutes.

Then the baby, my angel baby who never fusses, lost it. And I don't mean started with an easy fuss and worked his way up-- nope, he freaked! I got him out of his seat and moved to the end of the aisle to bounce as quickly I could... and it didn't help one bit. All of a sudden, the theatre of about 40 people morphed into 400 people and then 4000. I was dying. So I set the baby down on his blanket ON THE STEPS and ran back to my bag that was positioned behind Max to help him sit upright and hold the seat down and grabbed my Moby Wrap. The baby loves to be tied to me and it would certainly put him to sleep. During this, Jack decided he was going to the end of the aisle with me and nonchalantly picked up the full-to-the-top huge cherry coke that happened to be bigger than his head and dropped the entire thing. The whole theatre gasped- all 4 million people, and it had nothing to do with the movie. At this point, I was covered in cherry coke, Jack was covered in cherry coke and very upset that he had nothing to drink and my baby was on the floor at the end of the aisle, screaming his brains out.

I grabbed them as fast as I could and ran out of the movie. Without Max. Without my bag. Without my phone. Without my keys. Without the baby's seat. When I got out in the hall I just prayed that Max was ok and that he didn't feel abandoned although that is what he must certainly was! Now of course he was sitting right behind my girlfriends and his little friends, but he's my shy one who only likes to talk to me, so I just pictured him weeping silently. When I got outside, I put the baby back on the floor, no joke, to put my wrap on, and got the baby in it and waited for his instant settling. It never came. I bounced and walked and swayed and held the paci in his mouth, and still he cried. And honestly, I still have no idea what was going on. I eventually crept back in to check on Max with my still crying baby and saw that he was fine and ran back out. Jack was following along, and really as happy and complacent as could be, even though the circumstances were much less than ideal. We walked up and down every hallway, pointing to movie posters and discussing whether each person had a grumpy face or a happy face. We found squares on the floor to leap over. We used the mirrors on the ceiling to talk to and fake laugh at... and yes, we were the only ones in the whole lobby. The movie started at 11:45 and so at 1p, I asked the ticket attendant when Turbo was going to end, certain that time was almost up. He responded "at 1:35". I almost gave him my baby and left. Forever.

I was stuck. Stuck to the floor because of the cherry coke. Stuck because I had none of the things necessary to get me to my car and back to my house. Stuck because I didn't have my phone to call in back up. And stuck because my first born was still in the theatre (with all of my stuff!) enjoying the movie. I couldn't feed the baby to calm him down because there was no where to sit and no leash to tether Jack to me! I couldn't get the stroller because it was locked in my car. And I couldn't go back in the theatre for fear of my fellow movie goers who might not appreciate paying for a movie with the soundtrack of a screaming baby to go along with it. If the baby would've calmed down for even just a few minutes, I would've gone in and retrieved everything and ran away. But instead, I had to put my big girl panties on and continue bouncing around an empty movie theatre hoping my baby would fall asleep while trying to entertain a very busy 2 year old.

Finally, with 10 minutes left to the movie, the baby fell asleep. By this time, Jack was beside himself with his need for popcorn and of course I had nothing, so I couldn't buy him anymore and he was dying for a drink. So I decided to tiptoe back in and see what would happen... the baby stayed asleep... Jack got his rations... and I leaned back in the seat just in time to........ see the credits. When the lights came back on, and I collected my stuff, I apologized to Max for leaving him and he said "it's ok, I didn't say one word while you were gone." He also said it was the best movie he had seen yet.

Thanks for rubbing it in.

And as I drove home, I went over ways in my head on how to do it better next time. Where to position people, how to manage. I planned and thought and planned some more. Until it dawned on me. There will NEVER be a next time. I hope everyone enjoyed the last movie they will ever see in the theatre.

And by the way, my shoes are still sticky from the cherry coke incident.

Sappy

2013-07-25T16:16:00.003-04:00

I just left Gabe's new school- he will be going back to public school this fall and I registered him for 5th grade. I'm getting a little sappy over here as all these kiddos are hitting milestones, at the same time. Someone hand mama a brown paper bag, she's about to hyperventilate!

I remember picking Gabe up from kindergarten once a week and he would fall asleep before we were out of the parking lot- like mouth open, drooling, asleep. And now, his feet are bigger than mine, he makes his own bed daily and cleans his own room and bathroom weekly. He does his own bible study each morning, showers and dresses himself, and fixes his own breakfast. And really, that's a brief list. He's 10- that means we're over half way to the point that we'll be dropping him off at college instead of just the school around the corner.

To make matters worse, I came home and got to work on my to do list, which included making Max's 4 year check up. That's right, my baby Max is turning 4 next month. And really, he's just grown up so much all of a sudden. His brain, thinking process, and communication are that of a little boy, no longer a toddler. There is very little chub on his body- come to think of it, there may not be any left... I've been examining his legs and feet lately, and there just so long and lean, that I can't stand it. He is still my little buddy, and wants to go wherever I go, but the problem is that he's just not as little as he used to be.

And all of this happened the same week Jack put on undies for the first time. We are at the very beginning of the potty training process with him. I learned like 57 million things from the last time I did this, so I'm in no hurry, I'm not following any dumb formula, and I refuse to lose my mind over it. But seeing my little man in undies KILLS me! It's so grown up. As I looked through the pictures on my phone this morning, it just rubbed it in... at the beginning of May, Jack was my baby- this is a picture Chad sent me when him and Jack were running errands 2 days after baby Sam was born...

And then here is my little man now.

How can one baby lose all the chub and grow up in less than 3 months? He's like 2 going on 10. And he is DELECTABLE!

And speaking of baby, as if I didn't have enough milestones in the past 48 hours to send me into the fetal position, I started breaking the baby's swaddle, his little cacoon of safety, bit by bit. Saying goodbye to my sweet Paco Taco is rough. It feels like it marks the end of the newborn stage. Please, no! Do you know what that means? Sam's heading right on over to the baby stage and before I know it, he'll be bouncing in his jumparoo. And I did the math the other day- he's been here for 84 days. That's a big number but in my heart, it's only been like 5 minutes and I just can't get enough of him.

It's such a blessing to be in this place, with these healthy and happy boys, all hitting wonderful milestones. I know that it is all a gift from God. But that doesn't mean that I'm happy about the pace. If I could, I'd freeze time and drink all of this in a little longer. So boys, from here, let's do these things one at a time... with about 10 years in-between to give me time to adjust, ok my little men? Mama isn't a tough as she likes to think!

I'm In Trouble, BIG Trouble!

2013-07-24T16:16:00.000-04:00

So I realized recently that I'm in trouble in a big way. I always text my mom about things that happen in these parts and she's responded more than once with a "I can't wait for the blog on that one". And the fact that "it" was blog worthy, never even crossed my mind until she mentioned it. Did you catch that this has happened multiple times. I really must be going numb to the boys, their liveliness and (mis)adventures! It appears to be normal, daily life, when it reality, the things I've been encountering are anything but!

Here's a list that is in no way comprehensive or exhaustive, but it should give you a taste of "normal"these past weeks...

I regularly hear myself say things like "if you want to stand on Mommy, take your shoes off" and "don't drive trucks or motorcycles on the baby." If I had a nickle for each time I told Jack not to yell, I'd be rich-- his volume level include ear piercing, brain rattling, and asleep.

Max regularly starts a sentence with "Hey Mommy, can you come here? I peed on the wall because..." and honestly the ending doesn't matter. There is never a good reason, son, never. Why is it so hard to hit the bowl? It's like 1000 times bigger than the pee stream.

The other day, I was fixing water bottles for the boys and noticed something in Jack's lid- like the spout that lifts up and attaches to the straw. I always take them a part to wash each thing separately, so it was like peanut butter had gotten up in there. I couldn't think of how, but I took it apart again nonetheless to examine and it was a ROACH that had crawled up in there and died. Either Jack would've been drinking roach water or he would've sucked it into his mouth. Gives me the hee-bee jeebeez!

Max and Jack now share a room which could basically be an entertainment show each night. This includes jumping on beds, diving into the corners, cackling, singing every song they know at the top of their lungs, and "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" multiple times and at multiple speeds. It also includes different "levels" of night time... at first, the rule is no screaming (this is for Jack, mainly.) And then within 20 minutes or so, we go back in and add on level 2... keep your head on the pillow... and then before too long level 3: no talking. But really, fun with your brother is worth any cost, so it also usually includes a spanking or two for each boy. Now we can see them on the monitor and watch their every move and Jack can go from having a ball, the time of his life really, to flat on his back yelling "I no want spanking" in under .002 seconds at the mere sound of the door knob twisting. And how am I supposed to keep a straight face?

I've been working out again, post-baby, doing BeachBody's Focus T-25, and Jack likes to sit with me while I do it. I literally cannot breathe and he's offering me apple sticks, doing squats and giving a loud "whew" each time I'm sucking wind and moaning.

At least once a week, I cook dinner with the baby tied to me in his moby wrap and do all kind of yoga maneuvers to make sure nothing hot comes near him. I also get "help" with my bible study each day and even managed to get a special drawing in my bible when I wasn't looking. I tried to discipline and reinforce that we draw only on paper, not books, but let's be honest, this page will be my favorite in about 20 years when my nest is empty! I've recently said "aw man, the baby has toothpaste in his hair" and in one lunch, fed Gabe a completely pizza from Pizza Hut and an entire protein shake with a banana and OJ, and it was only then that he was full.

Gabe also found a frog of some sort in the back yard and it was their pride and joy for about 24 hours. They put him in the baby pool on our back porch and constantly had their hands in that water... and then came in my house flinging them all over the place like I don't have OCD or something. Hello boys... keep your frog germs outside lest you want your momma to lose it! And so what did they do after this lecture? Came in with frog hands to the paper towel roll, rubbed their hands all over the whole thing, before tearing off a tiny towel. Is this sanitary? The proceeded to name the frog "Toady" and spoke often of him, until Gabe noticed that he was "taking a stiff nap"... oops, they killed the little thing. Darn.

There are balls flying about 24/7, indoors, often coming off of a bat and I get hit at least once a day. At least one boy also gets a bump or bruise worthy of an ice pack daily as well. Blood is present more than I'd like to admit. These are things that once would've caused me to panic, and now, when I hear "the scream" it doesn't even do a number on my blood pressure. I get there when I can, ice in hand, and dole out kisses as necessary, and off we go, back to our regularly scheduled programming.

Gabe gets hung up semi-regularly on "keeping score" with his brothers so I asked him to make a list of the responsibilities of being 10 versus the rewards of being 10... I was trying to point out that while he may have more chores and have to fix his own breakfast, that he got to go to his friends house without me, have sleepovers, stay home alone, etc... but in his eyes, the rewards for being 10? Getting to read chapter books and not having to take naps. Hilarious!

So as I sit here and search my brain and text messages for reminders of all these funny things that are happening around me daily, things that I want to remember in 20 years although the seem like no big deal now adays, and as I get nervous that these things don't even phase me anymore, I can't help but also point out the things that will get me each and every time... I will never get over pudgy baby hands... I will never not appreciate "Mommy hold Jack"... I will never get over hearing any of the boys utter the best phrase ever, "I love you, Mommy"... Max will outgrow our naps times and hand holding long before I will, and hearing the boys tell each other "You're my best pal" will melt me every. single. time. Looking at their faces while they sleep will always be one of my favorite pastimes and just listening as they all play together and giggle will always be music to my hears. Watching Gabe, Max, and Jack scramble to find a paci the second Sam begins to fuss will always cause my heart to swell, and driving my extra full minivan will always be a source of pride and joy.

I may be growing numb... moreso each day... and the mud and muck is just a part of this life. But I can assure you that raising these boys, being entrusted with their hearts, being chosen as their mom, well now that is my treasure, my gift from God, and I will NOT get over it- it WILL get me every time. Man, I LOVE BEING A MOM.

House Guests

2013-07-23T21:45:00.002-04:00

Chad's brother, his wife, and their two teenagers arrived at our house last Sunday night and stayed until yesterday. And you know what they say about house guests...

Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days. -Benjamin Franklin

Well in this case, that was completely NOT true. Which really, to have that many people in our house- half big grown people and half little high maintenance people, is more than amazing. Now if you've ever been a house guest of ours, don't take this personally, but they are my favorite house guests I've ever had! Let me explain:

First of all, it doubled the amount of capable people in the house who love our boys. And it also doubled the entertainment. My boys always had a playmate and I always had help. Like I was left standing wondering what to do with my hands multiple times. That never happens to me. My arms are always full of babies, their stuff, their clothes, their food, their bags, and countless other items. I didn't push a stroller, clean the kitchen, load 47 children into the car, or have to pitch a baseball once all week. Technically it was their vacation, but I'm certain I got the better end of the deal! My kitchen was always cleared and cleaned after meals and I was never involved in the process, I had help with laundry, they helped clean up the playroom multiple times, and they even provided us with lots of donuts... my love language :)

We went to the food trucks for dinner, we had a day at the big aquatic center, we went to the grand opening of the new outlet mall, we spent the day at Stone Mountain, shopped downtown, there was LOTS of baseball and comics and beyblades, and we ate a lot! Guess that's what happens when you have a family consisting of mostly boys! Chad and Jeff fished a couple times, Zach went on the hunt of skate parks but never really found any that were open, Carrie got to see an old friend at Fort Gordon in Augusta and we even played at the kid park some. The only thing we (I!) forgot to do was to take pictures of all this as it happened, bummer!

We truly had such a great visit and all of my boys are convinced that the other Bowmans should move to Georgia. I explained that their jobs were in Texas to which Max decided that Uncle Jeff could certainly drive a police car in Georgia and that we had lots of cakes for Aunt Carrie... the simplicity of little minds :) We finally reached some peace when Gabe explained that they had to go back to Texas to see Grandma and Grandpa and Max and Jack decided that they'd be ok with that if necessary.

Thanks for the visit Bowmans, we miss y'all already!

2 months already!

2013-07-05T19:38:00.002-04:00

We need to freeze this baby right where he is! I've said this with all my babies, but Sam's first few months are flying even faster than the others! And I wanted them to slow down, so he needs to just freeze altogether for like a year. Seriously, I'd like him to be just like he is for another year or two. Anybody know anything about making that possible?

Sam is such an easy baby, filled with smiles and coos- he loves being held and cuddled but will sit just fine in his swing or bouncy seat when I need my hands. He's a great napper- even if the naps are on the go- and an even better night time sleeper-- we're talking at least 9-10 hours at night without eating, whaaaa??!! He sleeps swaddled tightly in his Momsoncall.com swaddle blanket and he also sleeps on his side most of the time, in a positioner. He really wanted to sleep on his tummy, but I'm too much of a rule follower/ worrier for that, so I opted for the "middle" which was side sleeping. I really do have a lot of fear around SIDS but I know it's not something I can control- I just have to do what I decide is best for my baby and trust the LORD. I know it it my head, it's just easier said than done! Anyway, he is starting to sleep on his back more, but before I know it, it will be time to break the swaddle and he'll probably find a way to end up on his tummy anyway, ha! He also sleeps with a sound machine, as all the boys still do, which is primarily so they will keep sleeping despite house noises and brother noises... which are at a high in these parts all the time! And he is my most hot-natured child to date and sleeps with his fan going and his room really chilly. It makes me happy too... wonder where he got that? :)

Sam's hair is always a conversation starter... mainly because he has so much of it and it's stark white AND it tends to stick straight up or out, depending on the day! If we let it get dirty enough, it will lay down, or if Jack gives him enough sloppy kisses then that seems to do the trick too. But I do love running my hand over his head and smelling him and just altogether nuzzling his head, so I can't say I blame Jack :) Jack is still the most affectionate with the baby, always wanting to see him and "hold it" and "Kiss" "one more" etc.... and this is multiple times a day and has not let up since birth! Max is great with the baby, very helpful and loves to be "put in charge" while I run to do something. He always tells me that he will take care of Sam and then he's quick to bring him his paci or find it in the swing if it's popped out. Gabe isn't all over the baby like the other two, but when no one's paying attention, he chats with the baby and is on paci brigade in the car. Really, Gabe has no tolerance for the baby crying so always wants to jump out of his seatbelt to fix the problem, but I won't let him unless we're stopped which is hard on him! But again, there is not an inhabitant in this house that doesn't ohh and ahhh over the baby- he's quite popular in these parts!

Sam's typical schedule starts around 7am when he eats, and then goes straight back to bed. Then he eats at 9am, noon, 3p, 6p, and 9p each day. About an hour after each feeding, he heads for a 2 hour nap, except for the 6p feeding, when I don't let him nap, although he'd like to! He may doze in our arms or in his swing, but no more than 20 minutes before I move his position just because I don't want it to get to a deep sleep. He gets a bath around 8:30 every night and then some cuddles and whispers from me or Chad until his last feeding. He is such a doll baby that just typing this makes me excited for bed time tonight- ah, love him! I am trying to move his bedtime up a little bit, without dropping any feedings because he still needs to eat 6 times a day, but I haven't figured out the best way to do that yet-- especially because we're all so used to these feed times, it makes it easy. It's hard to mess with something that's working so well!

Sam is slowly but surely outgrowing all his newborn clothes too! I really need to pack up a bin and get out the next, but I'm delaying as much as possible- I just need this baby to stop growing. On his 2 month day, we went to his pediatrician for his well check. He was perfect and they oogled him as expected :) Unfortunately, when you are well, that also means you get shots- boo. I have yet to do the vaccines the same way for any of the boys, but won't get into all that! Basically- I just do what I have decided is best at the time, for each of them. I am all in favor of vaccines, I just spread them out a little here and there and opt to wait until later on a few, etc... and we have a great doctor who talks through it all with me and helps me arrive at my decision. Here are Sam's stats from the visit:

Height: 22 3/4 (almost 75th percentile)
Weight: 11 lbs 3oz (50th percentile)
Head: 40cm (50th percentile and our smallest head to date in the family!)

Compared to Jack who was 10 lbs and 12oz and 21.7 inches at his 2 month appointment, and Max who was 11 lbs 15oz and 22.75 inches long. Jack is our little guy, but he was also 5 weeks early and had actually doubled his birth weight by 2 months!

Oh our dear Sam- we love you like crazy and the addition that you are to our family is perfection! You have melted me in way I didn't know was possible and I thought your brothers had already taking care of this completely. I love how my heart always has enough room to love a whole new person completely and crazily! I love talking with you and how my face makes you smile always- I wish I could clone you and pass you around to anyone having a bad day, you would cheer them up instantly! I'm so grateful that God gave me you- you are a gift! I love you more than you'll ever know, and that's true of your Daddy too! But what's even truer and bigger and perfect is God's love for you- I can't wait to tell you all about as you grow! Happy 2 months my baby Sam!

A Quick Rewind

2013-07-02T19:39:00.002-04:00

So about 2 weeks ago, Chad went on a mission trip for a week-- lots of things happened that needed to make the blog but he warned me not to post anything anywhere about him being gone so I basically remained silent for the week. All I could think was that if I posted something, I might accidentally post something about being a single mom or something and then the boogey man would read it and come sneak into our house in the middle of the night and I'd be all "seriously? I'm so tired, come back later." But he wouldn't so I'd be grumpy and wow, it was just too much. So I chose silence and picture-less instead.

So let's rewind. On Monday of that week, we dropped Gabe at Camp Highland in Ellijay, GA. It's the camp I worked at years ago and let's just say it has gotten quite the facelift from my days! BUT still the same great stuff and same great God working and moving there. He was SO nervous about it- it was his very first time at an overnight thing like that and it was for a whole week- Monday to Saturday- but I pushed because I knew he'd love it and that's exactly what happened! When I picked him up on Saturday, he was exhausted and hoarse and said three things to me immediately:
1) I can't believe it's already been a week, I feel like I've been here for like 2 days
2) When I come back next year.... yadda yadda
3) Can I go to sleep as soon as we get in the car?

It was a hit! And anytime we're on a woodsy road Jack shouts "Gabe, had fun at camp?" And we all says "yes Jack, Gabe had fun at camp" in that for the "1000 millionth time tone".

So it was just me and the younger 3 for the week. I knew that dinner would consist of cereal, mac n' cheese, and the likes, and that Max would sleep with me all week which would make bedtime much easier, and I set my goals really low for the week- for instance: feed the children. Keep them alive. Have some fun. And we achieved all my goals.

On Monday, Maddie, the family dog from my childhood who has lived with us for the past while got old and sick really quick, like overnight, so we had to put her to sleep. I am not/ was not attached to her at all and yet is still made me so sad I couldn't even stop thinking about it. My brother was so sad- she was his dog- and my mom, too. Oh- I am SO bad at loss- and it's not even my heart-- blah! Remind me to avoid feeling that way- I'll stick with joy and butterflies and giggles- I'm way better at that.

On Tuesday our church has mother's morning out- the first one ever- and it was just because and for free. Um, now that's the kind of joy I was referring to! Max and Jack were stoked to go play and made sure I understood I was to leave- funny. It was nice running errands and only loading the baby in and out. That afternoon, my mom came and kept al 3 boys and I even left her a bottle for the baby (I've never been away that long!) but it was for a great cause... getting my hair did! I had hombre going and not the kind you pay for... um, skunk roots! Then we met Danielle and her kiddos for dinner- Matt was on the same trip with Chad and she was doing the single mom thing as well.

Then on Wednesday, a skating rink near our house had what's called "Tiny Tots" which is only for 5 year olds and younger and they get to bring their own riding toys and take over the place and ride all over the skating rink. It was so great because the set up meant I actually got to sit and chill and chat with mom friends because they boys were loving it and right out on the floor in front of me. They're doing another next month and we will SO be there!

I have decided that this is the week that I'm going to move Jack to his new bed in Max's room- it's a big room so they both have their own beds in their now- and then move the baby out of our room into the nursery. My reason for doing it this week was to surprise Chad- he isn't a fan of the sound machine and baby noises in our room and plus, I was going to bed when the baby did in our room which meant Chad had to tiptoe to bed whenever he was ready- kinda like he was a visitor in his own room. Well Jack had done great all week and was so proud of his big bed and so it was time to move the baby. But I was DREADING it. Mainly because he's such a cute and easy baby and since I'm not going back to work, I just don't give a rat's patootie about his schedule or if he wakes me up or if he wants me to hold him all day, so I was LOVING him in our room. I loved his noises and just watching him and smelling him, and oh yummy. But I did it nonetheless. Aren't you proud? Well his first night in his crib was Wednesday which also happened to be the first night in his entire life that he woke up twice in one night to eat. Which reminded me why moms of newborns are tired. Once a night after pregnancy is seriously no big deal, but twice, umm, things get a little more hairy...blurry... foggy! So Thursday is when things get a little interesting. Mainly because I'm sleepy and this was my day that had a plan that mattered...

My mom was coming to get Max and Jack for the night because I needed to clean my house and decorate for a 30th surprise party... Danielle's 30th surprise party... the same Danielle I was hanging out with and checking in with all week... I was SO nervous she was going to stop by so I faked exhaustion and a 7pm bedtime and went to work. And all afternoon and evening as I worked like crazy, pausing to feed the baby every 3 hours, I just laughed at myself. When I just has Max, I could seriously get NOTHING done. It was not an act or perceived- it was just how it was. I could take care of a baby. That's it. But now, after living in my world that includes a big ole' bushel of boys, a whole afternoon and evening with only the baby produced incredible results-- I'm talking deep cleaning, mopping of floors and wiping of baseboards, dusting, vacuuming, and lots of decorating! After confirming with Danielle that she was staying over night at her parent's Thursday night, I even hung the decor and started setting out stuff on the tables, knowing that Friday I'd be busy retrieving my boys from my moms and Saturday we'd be picking Gabe up from camp... perfection.

Friday morning I continued working and cleaning and doing the last grocery run for the party- Danielle is a very loved lady so the party we going to include about 45 of her favorite people including kiddos. I had made lists and lists about my list and by Friday afternoon, everything was basically checked off except for the things that had to be done on Sunday. That afternoon, I drove to my parents for dinner and got Max and Jack and we headed home. I pulled in the driveway in time to put everyone straight to bed which was totally on purpose so that my house could stay in tip top shape. And I collapsed into bed too, exhausted, as well.

Saturday morning we had to hurry out of the house to pick up Gabe. YAY-- another way to keep the house clean :) I fed them an easy, neat breakfast and we were off. Now, to tell the truth, this part of the week got a bit rough- I'm not sure if it was because I was loading all the boys in and out and driving 3+ hours round trip, retrieving luggage and trying to feed a baby on his schedule, in public, while keeping the others alive and well, or if it was just because I was ready for Chad to be home, but I started wearing down. We had to eat lunch on the way home and got home just in time for naps... which left me only 24 more hours of keeping that house "ready" before the party. At this point, Danielle and I were planning to get together so I just had all these reasons why I had to get out of the house to make sure she didn't suggest playing at our house for the evening. Thankfully, it worked, and the plan was to meet at the park with dinner, let everyone play, and celebrate her last evening in her 20's, It was delightful, for the most part, with the exception of some bugs and a heat stroke while I had to feed the baby, but I'm not complaining, because once again, we made it to another sleep session without messing up my house!

Sunday morning included church, a great balloon pickup... I'm talking 4 boys, a mom, 30 latex balloons and 2 mylar balloons in one minivan. We were all laughing and giggling so hard, I had tears coming down my face. There was some lunch and then more naps and when we got up, CHAD WAS HOME!!!!!! Par-tay!

And then it was time for the actual party! It went off without a hitch... well except for the part where we left the garage door open to "look natural" and so they came in that door like all friends would, but the party guests were all posed by the front door for the surprise- oops!

We had such a wonderful time celebrating such a great friend- I loved every second of the prep and the party. She is such a joy to be around, I'm so grateful that God crossed our paths!

All in all the week was a great success- I enjoyed low key time with my boys and was totally fine on that front, I just missed Chad like crazy at the end of each day, because, hello, he's my person and who was I supposed to talk to?? It's really weird when you're used to knowing the in's and out's of a person's day, and then all of a sudden it's like you live separate lives for 7 days! I also always have great help/ relief/ back up from my mom- the world's best grandmother, so it's not like I'm ever roughing it by any means! So by the time Chad and Gabe got back home, we were super ready, but the nice part was that we weren't run down-- and that's a good thing, because after the party on Sunday evening, a new week started again bright and early the next day!

Celebration

2013-06-25T11:50:00.000-04:00

So last night, I had bible study at my girlfriend's house and I hurried out afterwards to get the baby home, bathed, fed and in bed. His last feeding is typically at 9, but I adjust on Mondays to make it around 9:30 so that I can take him to bible study with me. Chad has never done bed time with this little booger and really just doesn't know much about his routine so I can't leave him yet- and just know that this is not a complaint-- Chad knew the other two inside and out and even kept Max at home one day a week starting at his 6 wk mark- it's just that this baby is so sweet that I just love every single feeding, and so appreciate being home with him and not going back to work that I don't want him to do bottle- so really it's selfish :) Also, Chad isn't up to speed on the Moms on Call methods that I've used with this little guy- honestly, he doesn't EVER read those kind of parenting books or put much thought into it- I just tell him what I've read and what I've decided and ask for input when needed and he's A-ok with that... I think this is called being a man :)

Anyway, so back to last night- we did the routine a little later than normal, and then as I was swaddling him around 10pm and whispering my normal "I love you, baby-- see you soon" I decided to add "actually, I'll see you in the morning, ok?" And I did a soft little laugh and laid him in his bed. He always snuggles in for about 3 minutes and this fusses until I come back and give him his paci again, and then he's out. He never has to be picked up again or rocked or any of that (see, easiest baby ever!) and that's exactly what happened last night. Afterwards, I finished some laundry, did my bedtime routine, and we crawled into our own bed around 11-- honestly, that's really late for me- I go to bed at 10p usually and Chad goes to bed at the same time about 3-4 nights a week... mainly if the Spurs aren't playing (Thank you Jesus that basketball is over!) or some other tv program doesn't have a hold on him.

Next thing I know, I wake up and it's around 5:30am and there is no sounds from the baby. I search my brain trying to remember if I fed him and just forgot?? But "the girls" let me know that I have definitely not fed him in a very long time. (TMI?!?!) So I stare at the monitor and see this:

So I pray and ask God to please make him move or make a noise so I know he's ok AND He does! So I set the monitor down, and I praise God and go back to sleep for another hour... still nothing from the baby! At this point, "the girls" are ready to explode so I start making little noises so Sam will wake up and finally he does around 6:40. 6:40 people! He's 7 weeks old! This is a modern day miracle because I've NEVER had a baby sleep through the night before 9 months and that takes many nights of going in the room repetitively to shush without feeding to "teach" them that they can indeed go 8 hours without me-- I refer to this a Bowman Baby Bootcamp. Hate it. And apparently I'm not going to have to do it this go around. Oh what an angel baby!

So after I fed the baby, I went and made coffee and did my bible study alone. Alone! Did you read that? ALONE! Whhaaaa???? It seriously was a gift from God- I haven't slept through the night since I got pregnant with Sam and I feel like a new woman!

In other news, after all that, I went back to my room and Chad was still in bed sending texts and emails for the day. Jack came in batting a balloon around and saying the phrase Chad seriously hears 10000 times a day "Watch, Daddy, watch!" and of course we were watching and giggling at how cute he was and how hard he was working when all of a sudden Jack screams "gum!" and bends down and picks up something from the carpet and eats it. In our house, gum is mentos, and I was sure that there weren't any mentos in our room- I generally pass those out in the car to quiet chaos or keep people awake- and so I jumped up to see what Jack had put in his mouth. It was a bug. Jack ate a bug this morning. So it's not all sunshine and lollipops around here- I don't want you to get the wrong message. Our babies may sleep through the night but our toddlers also eat bugs.

And in case you forgot, today is my day :) Thank you baby Sam, and thank you Jesus!

The Day I Ran Out of Diapers...

2013-06-06T15:12:00.002-04:00

Just FYI, my mom came and got Jack yesterday for an over-nighter because he's so high maintence and needy right now that I can't even think straight. Basically I have a 1 month old who requires skin to skin for obvious reasons and then a 2 year old who also requires it, I think because the baby does, and he doesn't appreciate sharing. It gets ugly. So anyway, my mother, Lord bless her, made 24 hours of nothingness so she could do nothing but hold Jack and sing and read books. And do you know what happened? He went to bed like an angel at 8:15p and got up at 10am. That has happened zero times in the history of ever for any child I have ever given birth to. Really Jack?

But this post isn't about that. It's about the day that I, Lauren Marie Noblitt Bowman, ran out of diapers. Just that statement alone is monumental in itself because I'm known for being prepared- like over the top, embarrassingly so. I pack weeks before a trip, I plan months before a party, and if there's a chance of a change in weather, you can bet I'm prepared. This is also the reason that I always seem to be carrying a lot!

Anyway. So Tuesday, Chad left at the crack of dawn, reminding me that he would be home in time to fall into bed himself, and in my "I get up to feed a baby so mornings are a little rougher these days" fog, I nodded, rolled over, and continued snoozing. For about 9 more minutes. At which time Max showed up "hungry" and began the "will you get me's". But that's neither here not there.

So Tuesday, no husband, no problem. I'm a praying woman, so I beseech the Lord for a days worth of extras in all the areas I'm running dry, and before I know it, we've been to the Library, the park, Sonic for cheeseburgers and slushies, and all the babes are down for a nap. I take a hint and crawl in my own bed... Until the J-man who always naps for at least 2.5 hours blesses me with his shouts 1.5 hours early. I walk into his room and get slammed with a stench- hence the early waking- and so he got fresh pants at which time I noticed that the diapers were really low. But I have his little diaper bag for backup and the shared diaper bag for back up backup (prepared, remember?) so I decided to play with fire and make it a "to-do" for tomorrow because I was NOT loading up the 4 boys yet again. I was all out in that department.

And then something bad happened... Jack's new molars did something to his insides and the child went through 5 diapers in 30 minutes. And somehow I managed to put him in the last one in our whole house without knowing it, while barely making it to dinner time. At this point all the people are whining and needy but luckily I can see the light at the end of the tunnel... It's bath and bed time, folks! I start to gather pj's and wait, there's no diaper. Not. even. one. Any. Where.

I panic.

My mind races.

I panic some more.

It's 7:36 and I'm going to load up 4 boys and go to the grocery store. Fail. Like monumental. I send Gabe to the car with Max and Jack and I strap the baby in his seat. And I make a rash decision to strip my list off the side of the fridge, finish out the menu for the rest of the week, and get any groceries we might need for the remainder of the week, because if I have to go on Tuesday night, after bed time, with 4 boys, I better NOT have to go again for at least 5 days, come hell or high-water. The boys are in the car sweating, literally, as I dash around like a nut and finally plop in the driver's seat and blast the AC and some kid songs CD all the way to Kroger.

After getting Max and Jack into the car cart, the baby's seat into the basket, and instructing Gabe that he has to walk in front or behind because we are just too wide for him to walk beside me, we're off, in search of all the things on my list in 20 minutes or less, help me Jesus! (Side note: Gabe decides to walk in front and gets Max to honk the car horn every time I stop the cart to notify him to stop. I seriously appreciate the cleverness and teamwork in this plan!)

I grab the diapers first, in case we hve to bail at any point, and before I know it, my whole list is crossed off and all 4 Bowman boys have behaved beautifully. So naturally this calls for ice cream. For me. Ice cream of my choosing of course, which is how Heath Klondike Bars ended up in the cart, and like all moms have the ability of doing, this happened without any boy noticing... well baby Sam may have noticed but he's sworn to secrecy. Everyone starts to get cranky in the check out, while every employee convenes to gush over the 4 blonde hair blue eyed boys and gives me the "are you going to try for a girl?" and "oh you poor thing" a million times and I just bite my tongue for fear of screaming "get me outta here, can't you see I'm sweating and they're screeching?" So here is where I make my second terrible decision of the day- you'd think the waiting til tomorrow for diapers would've been enough, but no, I like to torture myself, so I waved the ice cream in front of them and promised they could have one at home, if they ceased all noise until they saw our driveway.

And tht is exactly what they did, which is why I found myself stripping down ice cream covered, bug spray covered, sweat covered boys 20 minutes later... Shoulda kept the ice cream all to myself, dumbo! But alas, after everyone showered and dressed and we met in Jack's room for one big family prayer because I didn't have the energy to pray and sing with each boy, I throw them all into the appropriate beds. DONE!

I collapsed onto the couch- my back hurt, I was still kicking myself of the stupidity, my teeth are still clenched, and yet I had made it. Barely. That's when I clicked over to Facebook, Klondike bar in hand, to see what comments, if any, I had gotten since posting my debacle for the world to see... AND I DIED. They were sweet, funny, resourceful, helpful, sympathizing, and could not have been more perfect if any way shape or form. And people knew this required ice cream! Hallelujah!

And so I fell into my own bed, at 9:47, with a grin on my face, because I knew I was the most blessed lady on this planet.

Happy 1 Month Baby Sam

2013-06-04T17:56:00.002-04:00

I can't believe our sweet baby Sam is already a month old! He's been a precious angel since day 1. I keep waiting for vampire baby, up all night baby, scream through dinner baby, but nope, just perfect baby! If he gets "fussy" it's this level of fussy that can barely even qualify and it's easily fixed with a few minutes in mommy's arms. He is rarely needed and he's a great sleeper. And when it's awake time, those baby blues are so precious that I just want to kiss his cheeks incessantly! His skin is oh so soft and we're working hard to fatten the lil man up! He was born at 7lbs 1oz, and dropped to 6 lbs 15oz. At his 2 week check up, he was 8lbs 8oz and that's when they just want you back to your birth weight! And then at 3 weeks, when we were at the ENT for the tongue/ lip tie clipping, he was already 9lbs 2 oz!! And one week later, I can't even imagine, because he looks so much fuller... just like mama ordered :)

Sam eats aroudn 7am, 9am, 12p, 3p, 6p, and 9p, and then we usually don't hear from him until around 3am- perfection. After his 7am feeding, he wants to go straight back to sleep, but after the others, he'll stay up and look around and smile at us and I just eat him up. Jack and Max are especially smitten with him, and comes around for all the awake times, supplying lots of kisses and pointing out things about him. And although Gabe isn't usually drooling all over him during the day, he loves showing him off when we're out and about and is quick to spout off all his stats-- he knows his exact age, how big he is, and anything anyone wants to ask. This baby is ADORED... and that's putting it lightly!

After the other boys go to bed, Sam usually gets about 30 minutes on the floor with Daddy- they discuss their day and solve the world's problems while I run around and pick up and hop in the shower. His hair is still a hit to all those we meet- and after every bath, it stands straight out like a new fluffy puppy. He doesn't mind his baths, he'll do a nice stint in the swing, usually around dinner prep, he's a great car rider, loves his momsoncall.com swaddle and schedule, and prefers to be on his tummy... which is hard for his rule follower of a mom!

And in his first month of life, Sam has already been to the pool a couple times... he slept right through it! He's taken several trips to the park... he slept right through that too. And he even had his first overnight across town with mommy. We had the hotel room to ourselves, and a weekend with the girls to hear Beth Moore and "get a word"-- it was awesome- and he slept right through that too!

This is how much stuff it takes for me and Sam to go across town for one night....

Isn't he cute sleeping in a hotel... and not waking up extra because he's in a weird place... good baby!

Plus, I got a whole weekend with just holding him and cuddling him- I enjoyed having one baby for 24 hours although we missed the others by the time we got back home! And then, Sam also went to his first Braves game this weekend, when they squeaked out another win in the 10th inning- he's a fan!

Check out the play by play...

Sam's Birthday:

1 Week Old:

2 Weeks Old:

3 Weeks Old:

4 Weeks Old:

1 Month Old:

Baby Sam, you're the perfect addition to our family! We love you more than words allow and are so thankful that God saw it fit to bless our family with you-- couldn't ask for anything more!

Sam's Munch n' Meet

2013-06-03T21:36:00.000-04:00

When we first decided not to find out if baby Sam was a boy or girl, it obviously put a wrench in any sort of shower or baby party... so my sweet friend Danielle decided that once the baby arrived that we must have a "sip n' see" type party. Of course, if the baby was a girl, there would be a great need for all things pink, ruffles, and girly, and if the baby was a boy, there'd be a need for ummm... nothing... but he'd be precious and people would want to meet him!

So Danielle gathered my list and made a plan on the front end, and then as soon as Sam was born, she sprang into action. First she decided that the sip n' see was a tad bit more girly and tad bit more middle of the day rather than evening so she came up with a "munch n' meet" instead. She enlisted the help of several other wonderful friends (aka Sam's fan club) and we decided that it'd be best to do it at my house so I wouldn't have to pack up and worry about feedings and all that. It was also sort of a drop in- with lots of yummy food- and mostly just chatting and passing the little precious man around... only after slathering on plenty of hand sanitizer of course.

The party was such a success- it was right in between 2 feedings, it was the perfect length, it was full of wonderful guests loving on my sweet baby, I got to have some adult interaction and feel human for a bit, and did I mention the food?? Yummmmmm!! Sam (me) also got lots of great gifts-- the practical stuff like tons of wipes, which only a seasoned mom truly knows the value of, and then new blankets and picture frames and decor for his nursery and clothes that are just his, not hand-me-downs from his brothers. By the end of the night, I was so overwhelmed with just how blessed I am with amazing friends and family. It was such a sweet time and I enjoyed it so much!

Bloglovin

2013-06-03T20:20:00.001-04:00

Did you know google reader is disappearing soon? Yep, hate that! But I'm starting to transfer all the blogs I read over to bloglovin and let's just say I'm lovin it, alright :) Cheesy, I know, but it's so easy and I'm a fan, what can I say? ANYWAY... just using this post for verification. But I do think you should head over to blog lovin and set up your own and add my blog, ok? Ok!

<a href="http://www.bloglovin.com/blog/5946873/?claim=j76yuwpy6nv">Follow my blog with Bloglovin</a>

The Pooh That's Not Hitting The Fan...

2013-05-30T15:01:00.001-04:00

You know, with this baby, I haven't had any of those moments where my head spins off and I cry and heave and shout and holler. It usually hits me within the first week, and again at the three week hump, but Sam turns 4wks tomorrow and there have been no emotional breakdowns or temper tantrums from me. I dare not call it a success yet, but I'm beginning to think we've escaped it.

I can think of a couple reasons why-- because of the home birth, I never went into that crazy exhaustion because night time nurses think everyone should be awake if they are and let's go check on that new mom every 24 minutes to make sure she never rests. And let's be honest, we were on the crazy train leading up to the birth- moving, acquiring Gabe and homeschooling, and growing said baby Sam among all the other nutty commitments we live in normally. Or it could be because this is the 3rd time we've done this in under 4 years and now we're just numb. I don't know, but I'll take it, because those post-partum lose it attacks are not pretty and it takes a loooooong time for recovery. Especially on your husband's part. He's all tip-toeing around and yes dear and nodding his head while backing himself out of the house. It's a good thing men don't call their friends and vent or else men would stop having children. They'd compare notes, hear about the post-baby crazy, and quit reproducing. The end of humanity would come quickly.

Anyway, let me tell you what is happening around here and you will see that the grace of God in resting atop this place! 1) Chad is in his busy season, aka we never see him. He is taking tomorrow off which makes me do the happy dance every time I think about it. But I'm leaving for abBeth Moore conference with girlfriends (and baby Sam) and then he's back to work Saturday so it's really a facade. But don't tell me. 2) Since Chad is in his busy season and I'm raising 4 boys, including one that is nourished by my own person every 3 hours, we've resigned to not really talking or connecting-- just more of a zone defense sort of game plan-- who's on what and when? Texting with location and ETA and all converging at the dinner table for a minute or two. I'm not complaining totally, because it's working, but I am resting in the fact that this is only a stage. 3) Sam was tongue and lip tied... I say was because I took him to an ENT on Tuesday and they clipped it WHILE I was holding him... Need I say more? 4) I need parenting advice from seasoned parents on how to handle Gabe. He is VERY respectful of me and never disobeys on purpose, but this 10 year old is so spacey and forgetful and just has his head in the clouds so often that I find myself fussing the majority of the time. He doesn't do what he's supposed to do and say's "oh I forgot" a million times a day and loses things like it's his purpose in life. How do you train and discipline that? How do you teach responsibility and let him suffer consequences even though he's not really doing it on purpose- he's just not paying attention, ever!!!?!! Help please! 5) Jack is acting out because of the baby... Huge fits at bed time, never obeying, following me around all day crying "mommy I need you" every second that I'm not holding him. (reminder, I feed a baby a bazillion times a day so poor Jack!) He even had my mother ready to give him away yesterday and that's basically impossible. 6) Max is actually in his prime right now-- wanting to do everything by himself including making his own bed and dressing himself and sleeping in big boy undies all night and seriously never wetting. Just all of a sudden he was like "hey, I'm gonna go from 3 to 13, watch mom!" and I'm all huddled up, weeping in the corner, praising his independence on the outside but hating it on the inside. Let's be honest- its a gift from God during this time- I can't be all thing to all people- but I'm still not ready to accept that he isn't as needing of me anymore. Tear(s). 7) And last but not least, I packed up my maternity clothes because there's nothing like the threat of having to go naked to get you to make good food choices. But I have like 2 things I can wear. People are going to start noticing...

8) These people dirty up 486 loads of laundry a week and yesterday, while folding laundry during nap time, Sam filled his diaper, then his cup runneth over... Onto my bed, and me, through the sheets, to the mattress pad and managed to get it on 3 blankets and a burp cloth. Thank you for more laundry- I had nothing better to do.

And see. I write all that- there's probably 10 more but my brain is only functioning at 47% right now- and there's still no break downs. Now tell me there's not a God all up in this place! He's spreading some serious peace and chill pills and we're all even smiling and liking each other, going places, and enjoying the sunshine. I can't promise the same for next week, unless the Lord continues to intervene- but let's just say that if God can relax this OCD uptight type A crazy woman, into this new me- more laid back, enjoying all these precious moments, basking in this stage- with no help or cooperation on my part, then He is certainly still in the business of miracles!

Thank you Father!

That's all from the Bowmans for now... Hopefully I'll get a Sam update, including how fast he's growing up soon-- what a baby!!! He's amazing :)

Sam's Peeps and other firsts...

2013-05-22T08:00:00.000-04:00

A day late and a dollar short seems to be the name of the game right now!! But I've got some major catching up to do on our sweet baby Sam!

First of all, there was a slew of big brothers just waiting to meet Sam... they all were shipped out in their sleep and waited for the news all day. Lucky for Max and Jack, time doesn't really apply, but to Gabe, he knew there should be news, and just couldn't wait to know... finally, once Sam arrived, he talked his grandparents into bringing him over almost immediately- he was there by about 4:30pm! Gabe and Grandma and Grandpa were baby Sam's first visitors. They snapped lots of pictures and oohhed and ahhhed over his headful of hair!

Next, Max and Jack, along with Annie, Pop, Uncle Eli, and my dinner :) arrived. Max was so in love- it was like a scene from a movie. He was proud and beaming... kind of like me and Chad! Jack was so excited, he was screaming "baby Sam!" and giving him kisses all over. Chad had to hover to protect Sam from Jack, totally because Jack just didn't understand how gentle he needed to be- never has he shown any roughness or ill-will towards Sam... just love, bull-in-a-china-shop style. Of course Annie and Pop and Eli thought he was perfect- which he is- and everyone took turns holding him and being in awe of him.

Later in the weekend, my friends Jill and Danielle stopped by too, and of course, melted, because he is that precious. And from there, we took it really easy and remained low key. This is really the first time we took that route- typically we've had some visitors in the hospital and then lots right when we get home, but with the home birth, it just changed all that- I'm not sure why! We didn't scare anyone off or anything, but me and Sam did a lot of feeding and sleeping and Chad joined us for naps when he could. And then even when the big brothers came home, I took more time than I normally do just to soak in my baby. It was an incredible time because Chad and my mom were here running everything and playing with the little men, and I felt so good and wasn't sore at all, so I seriously got to just hold my baby close and smell him and take in his every inch. He was within a foot of my body at all times for the first 5 days! It was such a sweet time. I honestly don't know why us women are in such a hurry to get back into the swing of things, because doing the opposite was such a precious few days that I'll never get again... and that I'll never forget! I'm blessed to have people around me that made this
possible!

By Sam's 1 week day, Chad had returned to work and my mom stayed home (but remained on call if needed!) and I was itching to get out. It's very unlike me to stay at my house for a week straight so I needed an adventure. It was mother's day weekend and the weekend of Sam's munch n' meet, so I decided the little boys needed a hair cut... in the worst way! Typically, my cousin does all of our hair, but it's a longer drive than I was willing to make and I hadn't planned ahead at all, so we headed around the corner to the kid haircut place, Pigtales and Crew cuts, after making a stop at Dunkin Donuts of course... this was Sam's first outing besides his weigh in at the doctor, which was really like a 2 minute excursion, and obviously I had to train up a child in the way he should go, which obviously calls for donuts on the first outing. He was impressed.

This was how Max prepared Sam for his weigh in at the doc... gave him a book to read while he waited :)

Sam also had his first bath to celebrate his first week in the world!

The next day, Saturday, Sam's 8th day, was his munch n' meet that my sweet friend Danielle put together, along with some other sweet girlfriends-- Jolynn, Lisa, Anna, Heather, and Jenny. I'll do another post on this once I get the pictures from Danielle, but to say we were blessed and loved on is an understatement!

On Sunday, we made it to church for Mother's Day and then went to my aunt's house for lunch with my Dad's side of the family... my Dad's parents were there, along with their 6 great grand children (including my 3) and everyone enjoyed great weather, watched the boys play baseball, and held our sweet bundle. This was Sam's introduction to the Noblitt's and he did some of his best work wooing them... with his eyes closed :)

When Sam was 11 days old, I took all 3 boys to my last BSF bible study of the year... I missed the girls in my group BAD and they had prayed me all the way through my pregnancy- I was literally just like 8 weeks when it started, so I wanted them to meet Sam so bad! It was totally uneventful- I got us in and out of the car like I'd been doing it for weeks, we were even a few minutes early! AND then we joined the Prusa ladies for Chick-fila lunch... until Jack totally melted down like he was about to be 2... and then I ran to the safe haven of the minivan faster than you can say lickety-split!

The next day, with Chad's help, all 6 of us went to the last youth group of the year... once again, my sweet 6th grade girls have been so excited about this baby and before we broke for the summer, they needed to lay eyes on the little precious man! They were thoroughly impressed, as was my sweet co-leader, and I kept him tied to me in the moby wrap to keep hands off for a bit longer... I just let people peek and explained that they could all hold him in a few weeks, that I just wasn't ready for germs or to pass him around. Even as 12 year olds, they were totally on board with this and just stared at him in amazement! Some people are just baby people at birth, and we have a group full of those!

And then on Sam's 2 week day, we ventured to my mom's for the day, which included some shopping at the mall for new shoes for Max, and the first swim of the year... Sam was thoroughly impressed by this as well!

Basically, Sam is THE sweetest, most laid back baby. He's a great eater- he's gained over a pound and a half in 2 weeks... they usually just want you back to your birth weight by then, but our boy has jumped from 7lbs 1oz to 8lbs 8oz- he's also a great sleeper, barely gets upset and if he does, he just makes a noise or two for a moment and then chills again. He is pretty hot-natured, so doesn't love to be bundled except after baths, but does think cuddling and sleeping on my chest is the way to go. He's already a paci baby, although he spits it out as soon as he gets good and asleep. He sleeps for about 5 hours at night, eats, and then goes 4 more-- which makes for awesome nights for his mama as long as his reflux doesn't act up. He potentially has a lip and tongue tie, after being assessed by a lactation specialist, but his pediatrician doesn't think this is the case, so we'll see an ENT next week to have everything checked out. I keep waiting for vampire baby to strike or that lovely witching hour, but so far, he's a dream baby! Needless to say, we've all voted and we're in favor of keeping him! I seriously feel like God is playing favorites and somehow we made the list :) All I can do is say thank you Jesus again and again and again!

Sweet Jack is 2!

2013-05-21T18:01:00.004-04:00

I cannot believe our wild man Jack turns 2 today... in some ways he's aged me a good 20 years... you know, diving off things, scaling walls, driving his little coupe over a cliff... but in other ways, he's showed me how important it is to just sit and soak life in, he's slowed me down-- he's shown me love and joy and laughter in ways I've never known before there was Jack. Anytime I survey his still chubby hands, his legs, the light in his eyes, and watch how his brain works, I find myself basking in the glory of God-- because man, was God on his A-game the day he made Jack!

Unfortunately, Jack has really figured out how to act two... crying and hollering to get his way, make his opinion VERY clear, fighting tooth and nail to get his way. The terrible two's. But he's also figured out how to talk so clearly, he knows his letters, his numbers, all his colors, and can sing a bushel of songs. He is constantly figuring things out and he's become really independent-- wanting to do it all by himself... "Jack do it, JACK DO IT!" He's full of energy and doesn't stop unless he sleeps... and when he sleeps, he sleeps hard. The terrific two's. It amazing how this age can make you smile like crazy one minute and require a stiff drink the next... there's a reason I'm getting gray hairs... but man, that reason is cute!

We hit two major milestones this week-- one broke my heart and one is going to break me... the first is the paci: Jack has been a paci baby since the beginning and was rarely without it. He's even a pro at talking with it. But he also sucks on the thing so dang hard that he eventually puts a hole in and then all of a sudden he'll toss is at me and say "I don't like it". It took me a while to figure out what was going on, but once the paci get's a hole, it takes away the whole premise of a paci with air flowing in and out, making a whistling sound. Jack despises this. Well a couple days ago, they all got holes on the same day- like all 5 in his basket. It was nuts. I kept popping them in my mouth when he'd toss them at me and sure enough, it was broken. It ususally happened about once every 2 weeks, which means I'd buy a new pack or two every month, no big deal. But when they all fell apart on the same day, a day when our new baby wasn't even 2 weeks old and when the mama wasn't prepared to leave the house for any reason, we found ourselves at nap time with no paci. I expected gnashing of teeth, screaming and thrashing about, but he just laid down and slept. Certainly it was a mistake- he was a baby, my baby, for pete's sake... and he needed a paci, but then we found ourselves at bedtime without a paci and again, laid down and slept like an angel. It was no mistake- my baby was getting big and everyone was excited but me! If you ask Jack what happened to his paci he'll say "Paci broken, paci in trash, bummer!" It's adorable! If things get rough, he'll mention it briefly and we'll discuss what happened and then he's fine again. But just fyi, I'm still not fine. I wasn't prepared for this milestone!

The second is the potty- Jack is so ready- he tells you when he has "things" in his pants and needs changed, he knows all about the potty and flushing, he join me and Max in the bathroom ALL the time, and I just need to start the process. The other night, because Chad doesn't obsess with plans and methods and dates, he asked Jack if he needed to go potty, Jack said yes, Chad put him on the potty, AND just like that the child peed in it. There was no book. No discussion. Just pottying. And this is going to break me-- mainly because I despise potty training. Give me any other obstacle in parenting small people and I'll embrace it, but potty training, please NO! It's messy, obviously, it's a hassle, yes, but that isn't what gets me... what gets me is the loss of control. I know I'll find myself in impossible predicaments, hoisting myself and 4 boys into nasty public bathrooms, scurrying off the road, and running across the house at just the mention of peeing. I understand the argument of buying less diapers, but you see, with the diaper, I get to decide when he gets changed-- it's all on my time table, said the control freak. But alas, as soon as baby Sam settles a little more into life on the outside, we'll tackle potty training with Jack... and I'll fight it every step of the way.

For Jack's birthday today, my mom and Uncle Eli came over and while we had big plans to check out a new aquatic center, it was actually closed, so we found ourselves at CatchAir with 4 sweaty little boys... Gabe, Max, and Jack because they ran around and played like crazy people, and baby Sam because he's a hot natured little thing! Uncle Eli played the whole time and me and my mom watched and chatted and took pictures... I think we got the better end of the deal, but don't tell Uncle E! But I guess that's what happens when you give yourself the nickname of Fun Uncle Eli: "Funcleli". My brother Sam is coming in town this weekend to meet baby Sam and to celebrate Jack some more... but Jack is certainly up for as much cake/ cupcakes/ ice cream/ popsicles as is necessitated by many celebrations. (Btw, Jack did insist on a popsicle this morning for breakfast, and we couldn't resist such an adorable birthday boy's wish!)

When you ask Jack how old he is, this is how he does "2"!

Little Jack man, you are such a joy and we love you more and more each day. Thank you for filling our home with noise and love and laughter-- you bless us and we are proud to be your parents! Your Daddy is wrapped around your finger and Gabe and Max don't fare much better! Of course I'm putty when you say things like "Mommy, I need you!" and I miss my little shadow if you run off for too long! You are an incredible big brother to baby Sam- you took to it right away and beg to "hold it" all the time! And if you can't hold "it" you are kissing his head and feet incessantly. That is you, my boy- an incredible asset to our family and a marvelous display of God's brilliance! Love you so much-- there are no words!